


Some Things Never Change

by LockDown



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, Other, whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-05
Updated: 2015-08-18
Packaged: 2018-04-05 04:35:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 181,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4166112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LockDown/pseuds/LockDown
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carmilla and Laura were best friends during childhood. Sparks fly, and Carmilla and Laura realize they probably don't like each other as just friends. But the good things never last, and Carmilla has to move due to living in a military family. <br/>What happens when they bump into each other 8 years later?</p>
<p>Featuring puppy dog Kirsch, the ginger squad, wonderful siblings William and Mattie, and Victorian Dandy JP</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Caramel and the Cupcake

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing, and I kinda threw this together in like 2 weeks. I was originally writing it as practice but then I kept working on it and eventually it became a finished story.  
> The first couple chapters are kinda short but they get longer in later chapters.  
> I hope you enjoy reading it!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We start off when they first meet on Carmilla's first day of elementary school in her new town. Carmilla is 7 and Laura is 6.

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla has moved countless of times in her life, and this was no different. It never got any easier, however. She’s moved a total of 3 times already, so she knew how it went down. Make a few acquaintances, don’t get too attached, work hard, and say goodbye. That’s how every year went for Carmilla thus far; and she has no plans to change the tide.

She walked into the small school holding onto her backpack straps tightly, hiding behind her bangs. It was November so the other students knew the schedule and their way around the school, and Carmilla knew that. So she landed her eye on a small girl with caramel colored hair she had seen on the bus and followed her.

Tightly by her side was a tall boy with buzzed brown hair. He was bouncing around all about with his black backpack swung over one shoulder. Carmilla decided to keep her distance from him; he had too much energy for her to handle and she was _not_ a morning person.

Carmilla followed the duo into the school and into a cafeteria. It was small, just like all the other features of the elementary. Blue tables scattered about in neatly packed rows, yellow, white, and blue tiles covering the floor, a large, white ceiling with dim lights. It wasn’t really welcoming; not at all. But Carmilla knew she wasn’t going to stay long anyhow, so it barely mattered to her.

The pair sat down at a table amongst other students, and Carmilla wondered if she was supposed to sit there as well. She looked around completely lost, feeling awkward and alone. Her eyes frantically darted around the caf in search for a teacher, but they all had their arms crossed with stern faces that reminded her of her mother, making her unable to approach them.

“Um… Excuse me?” Carmilla heard a soft voice speak to her. Carmilla ignored the voice, assuming it wasn’t directed towards her. Carmilla always had an aura that pushed people away. From her constant scowl to her dark eyes to the way she hid behind her bangs; people always took that as “unfriendly” - and Carmilla liked that. She loved being alone, not relying on anyone but herself. Sure she would get lonely, but it was better that way. She deserved the loneliness.

The fact that someone would talk to her is a ridiculous presumption. No one would dare speak to the broody child. It's idiotic to believe- Suddenly a hand waved in front of her face.

“Hellooo?” Carmilla followed the waving hand down to the caramel haired girl who she’d been following. Big brown eyes so full of hope beamed up at her. Carmilla stared at the girl for a moment and felt a blush reach her cheeks. “Are you lost?” The girl asked. Carmilla’s heart skipped a beat when she realized that yes; this girl was talking to her.

“Uh- um. I- I just…” Carmilla was never good talking, or speaking in general for that matter. “I’m new here.” Carmilla finally blurted out. She now could see the full features of the younger girl. She had a stub nose and a wide smile, her caramel hair stopping at her shoulders and parting down the middle of her forehead. She had a small frame and was wearing a blue dress with a white cupcake on it. This girl was no doubt adorable.

“Oh!” The tiny girl exclaimed. “Have you gone to the principle’s office?” Carmilla shook her head. Her mother had briefed her on what to do, but Carmilla didn’t listen. She was too upset on the fact of starting a new school again that she was too in her own head to care. “Do you know where it is?” Carmilla once again bobbed her head. The tiny girl abruptly stood up and took Carmilla’s hand, causing Carmilla to blush. “I’ll take you there!” The tiny girl started dragging Carmilla out of the cafeteria and down some hallway. Carmilla couldn’t help but wonder what she was feeling, and why her guard was let down around the tiny girl.

“My name is Laura!” Laura announced proudly. “What’s your name?”

“Carmilla.” Carmilla replied quietly. She was sure the girl didn't listen to her name, so Carmilla started to take in her surroundings. The walls were painted white but stained yellow with years of age, the dim lights carrying throughout the hall. Children’s paintings were hung all over them. Carmilla has always been mature for her age, and she scoffed at the terrible drawings of the children she thought to be far superior to. She knew that the teacher’s must have been on a fake expression of amazement upon seeing the terrible art. Carmilla almost felt bad for the children, because they must believe they were the next Leonardo Da Vinci.

They came to a halt at a small structure with large windows. Carmilla could see women working on computers and talking on phones. Carmilla felt scared upon seeing the middle-aged brunettes and blondes, reminding her of the woman she had to go home to. Carmilla squeezed Laura’s hand and suddenly she wasn’t so terrified anymore. Laura opened the door and led them inside.

“Excuse me!” Laura said boisterously. But none of the ladies cared to acknowledge her. Carmilla was about to give up, when Laura cleared her throat. “Excuse me!” Laura said a little more loudly, causing one of the ladies to look up from their computer. Carmilla smirked at the stubbornness to the girl, some secure feeling washing over her. The woman gave Laura a puzzled look and walked over to the two little kids.

“Yes sweetheart?” The woman said with a fake smile. Laura straightened her back.

“My friend here is new.” Laura proclaimed. Carmilla was taken aback for a moment. _Friend?_ Carmilla thought to herself. No one has ever dared to call Carmilla their friend, not in public at least.

“Oh, wonderful. You must be Carmilla." The woman said. _Must I be?_ Carmilla thought to herself. The lanky woman turned her attention back to Laura. "Thank you. Go back to the cafeteria now before they call up your class.” The woman said, bending down a bit to place a hand on Laura’s shoulder. Laura nodded. With that, Laura scurried off. Carmilla felt vulnerable again, and wondered if she would see more of this girl. 

 

**Laura**

 

Laura was surprised to see the girl from before sitting at a lone desk. Laura looked up to Kirsch, who was also eyeing Caramel. Or was it Carmel? Laura wasn't exactly sure. But, she took her over large friend's hand and dragged him over to the desk to sit with the brunette. He happily obliged. 

"Hey! My name's Wilson, but you can call me Kirsch!" He greeted excitedly as he plopped down next to her. Caramel stared at him with what was close to a glare. She clearly wasn't going to speak.

"This is Caramel!" Laura announced loudly. The girl chuckled, and Laura thinks it's the bestest chuckle she's ever heard.

"It's Carmilla, cupcake." Carmel said. Laura cocked her head.

"Cupcake?" Laura said. Caramel pointed to Laura's dress, which had a large cupcake on it.

"Cupcake." Carmel repeated. Laura smiled widely.

"Oh! So I'm cupcake, he's Kirsch, and you're Caramel!" Laura said with a giggle. She watched the girl's dark eyes light up a bit, and Laura wonders what made them so dark.

"It's Carmilla." She said. Laura nodded and furrowed her eyebrows in concentration.

"Carmilla." Laura retaliated. "Ugh, can I just call you Carm?" Carmilla shrugged.

"Why not?" Laura's smile got impossibly wider and she did a little happy dance in her seat. 

"Caramel, and the Cupcake." Carmilla said coolly. Laura laughed loudly.

"What about me!" Kirsch whined.

"Right. Caramel, Kirsch, and Cupcake!" Laura said, making sure to include her puppy-like friend. "We're like... We're like the three musketeers!" Kirsch exclaimed. Carmilla rolled her eyes and shrugged in agreement.

"Sure. The three musketeers." Carmilla said. Laura laughed and the three continued a conversation on their group names and whatever popped into the kid's heads. Carmilla had an odd calming aura that Laura was drawn to. She loved her snarky comments and high "smartness" as Laura liked to put it. She knew she wanted to be this girl's friend. 

 

**Carmilla**

 

It's been a few weeks since Laura and Carmilla became friends. Now, Carmilla was standing in front of Laura's doorstep, ringing the doorbell. It's the first time she's ever been to the girl's house. Turns out they only live 8 minutes from each other, so Carmilla walked here. A few moments later and the door flung open.

"Carm!" Laura exclaimed, pulling Carmilla into a bone crushing hug. Carmilla hugged the smaller girl back, glad that she didn't have any bruises this week. 

"Hey cupcake." Carmilla greeted as she pulled back. Carmilla could see inside the house, a staircase being the first thing she saw as it was directly behind Laura. On one side was what looked like a living room, and on the other a kitchen. It was small, but cozy. Nothing that Carmilla was ever used to.

"Come on inside and play!" Laura said, taking Carmilla's hand and dragging her inside. Carmilla smiled as the smaller girl brought her to an assortment of toys. She was never allowed to have toys, so seeing so many made her a bit excited. 

Carmilla picked up a stuffed animal cat while Laura gathered some legos.

"I'm gonna build it a house!" Laura said, starting to piece together legos. Carmilla huffed.

"Cats don't live in houses. They free roam." Carmilla pronounced, straightening her back to size Laura up. Laura shook her head.

"Well this cat does. And it has a pool!" Carmilla huffed again, irritated at the girl's ignorance toward, what Carmilla thought to be, actual cat facts.

"Uh, cats hate water. Duh." Carmilla replied, stroking the stuffed animal's fur. 

"No way you big dummy. Cat's drink water. If they hated water so much, why do they drink it?" She pondered the thought for a moment. Laura had a good point, but Carmilla always needed to be right. She is _not_ a dummy.

"They drink it 'cause they have to. But given the chance to swim in water, and they will hiss." Carmilla said, imitating a hissing sound. Laura huffed. "Dummy." Carmilla muttered.

"Hey! I'm not a dummy!" Laura said, placing her hands on her hips.

"Yuh huh!"

"Nuh uh!"

Yuh uh!" Laura jolted to her feet.

"Nuh UH!" Laura shouted. Carmilla raised her arms as a knee jerk reaction, fearing that Laura would punish her.

"I'm sorry!" Carmilla exclaimed, waiting for a hand to strike across her cheek. She could feel it now; she could feel her mother's cold stare, her mother's foot kicking into her ribs. She could feel her mother's hand smacking her face. Carmilla could hear the piercing sound that resonated after she was hit, but was surprised when she felt a soft hand on her shoulder. Carmilla lowered her arms to see Laura staring at her with those warm, brown eyes. It was an odd feeling; feeling so secure but also fearing punishment.

"Are you okay?" Laura asked softly. Carmilla cocked her head. She was confused at the kindness. Had she not just done wrong? Didn't she deserve to be punished?

"You... You're not going to hit me?" Carmilla stuttered out, surprised at the hospitality of the younger girl. Laura shook her head.

"No! Of course not, Carm. I'd never hurt you." Carmilla felt tears start to stream down her cheeks, and Laura wrapped her arms around Carmilla and pulled her into a hug. For the first time, Carmilla realized she felt secure. She's safe when she's with Laura; she'll never hurt her.

She's safe.

 

**Laura**

 

It was mid-way through the year. Carmilla and Laura have been friends for nearly 4 months now. Or, as Laura liked to call them: "Super Mega Awesome Ultimate Best Friends Forever!" It took an amazingly short amount of time for the two to become super close. So Laura wasn't surprised when Carmilla showed up at her house randomly, which she did a lot. But this time something was different. Carmilla looked sad, and there was a bruise under her chin. Her eyes were fighting back tears, but as soon as she saw Laura she broke down.

"Carm?" The girl replied with sobs and sniffles. Laura immediately dragged her friend inside her home and shut the door, rushing to bring Carmilla to her room. Laura asked if Carmilla was okay, but Carmilla didn't answer. Laura knew that when people didn't reply, to not push it- especially with people like Carmilla. But she had to do something for her dismal friend. She was clearly sad, and Laura couldn't just stand there and do nothing. 

Laura grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around Carmilla's shoulders. She darted back downstairs and made hot cocoa, grabbing a cookie package while she was at it because seriously, cookies make everything better. 

The small girl rushed back upstairs with her Tardis mug in hand and cookies in other. Laura bursted through her door and brought the gifts to her distraught friend, closing the door soon after. Laura plopped down next to Carmilla and rubbed her back, making sure she drank the hot cocoa and ate the cookies. They had to make her feel better at least a little bit. Cookies and hot cocoa always made Laura feel better on the worst of days. But it was clear the only thing that made Carmilla feel better was the small things coming from Laura, not the actual things themselves. Laura wrapped her arms around Carmilla and held her tightly.

She decided then that no matter what, she was going to be there for Carmilla. Laura decided that even if Carmilla didn't tell her what was wrong, she was going to protect and take care of her friend whenever she was sad.

Always.


	2. Late Night Secrets and the Ginger Squad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we do a little time hop here! Laura is now 8 and Carmilla is 9. The two are beginning 3rd grade and are two years into their friendship. This is when they meet Lafontaine, Danny, and Perry. In these early chapters however Lafontaine will be used with the incorrect she/her pronouns and will be called Susan. This is ONLY because they don’t know that they are non-binary and they don’t know what that is yet.  
> Hope you enjoy!

**Laura**

 

Laura was sitting on the bus, a small ball of energy just waiting to begin third grade. She kept the spot next to her open for Carmilla as she always has. Kirsch sat in the seat next to her. His large legs were swung into the aisle so he could face Laura and talk to her.

“I wonder what our teacher is going to be like Laura!” Kirsch exclaimed with that goofy smile. Kirsch had amazingly blue eyes, short brown hair, a large frame, and a big heart. Kirsch and Laura have been friends literally their whole life. They were born next to each other in the hospital, which caused their parents to talk. Their families instantly became best friends; they even live right next to each other. Kirsch and Laura have always been in the same class since Kindergarten - and this year was no different.

“I’m so excited!” Laura exclaimed giddily. She scooted to the edge of her seat to get closer to Kirsch, but she didn’t dare put her legs in the isle like Kirsch. The rules said you couldn’t do that (though her bus driver could not care any less if she did or not) and Laura was absolutely **NOT** a rule breaker.

“Do you think we’ll make new friends?” Kirsch asked with a glimmer of hope in his eyes. Laura smiled and nodded.

“Of course I do! We’ll make lots!” Laura replied. But in reality neither of them had many other friends besides Carmilla. Kirsch had a few sport friends, but none he was too close with. Laura was seen as annoying by most of the grade, so she didn’t have much luck with making friends either.

The bus came to a stop and Laura squirmed excitedly in her seat - this was Carmilla’s stop. Sure Carmilla visited Laura’s house nearly every day all summer, but that didn’t mean Laura wasn’t ecstatic to see her friend.

In their two years of friendship Laura was only over Carmilla’s house once, and it was to give her soup when she got the flu. It ended up with Carmilla saying Laura couldn’t be there over and over again and yelling at her for visiting. Carmilla has never explained why Laura can’t come over, but Laura has enough brains to know not to question it, as Carmilla was clearly sensitive to the subject.

Carmilla came onto the bus and Laura scooted so she could take the window seat as usual. Laura greeted Carmilla with a large hug, but Carmilla was too tired to put as much energy into it as Laura. So, she settled with throwing an arm around her shoulders and giving the tiny girl a quick squeeze.

“Hey dweeb!” Kirsch exclaimed. Carmilla shot him an angry look and replied with a vague threat, but Kirsch has known her long enough to know its empty and she wouldn’t actually hurt him. 8 minutes and a whole lot of talking later the three outcasts made their way into the small elementary school and into the cafeteria. Lucky for them they all shared the same homeroom teacher, so they got to stick together.

“We’re going to make so many friends!” Laura said giddily.

“God I hope not.” Carmilla grumbled as she continued to read her book. Carmilla was on a 5th grade reading level, and she was exceptional at everything she does. Really she could skip a couple grades, but Carmilla has always refused. Laura has always wondered why.

“Oh don’t be so grumpy!” Laura said, nudging the dark haired girl with her elbow. Carmilla rolled her eyes but couldn’t hide the smirk tugging on her lips. Eventually a woman announced for the students to pile in lines according to homeroom and follow the teacher there. After that, and entering their homeroom, the three decided on an empty table.

Laura and Kirsch excitedly set up their supplies whilst Carmilla simply continued her reading and plopped her feet up on an empty chair. Other students continued to pile in, and Laura has never been more excited. At least that’s what she says every year- every year she couldn't be more excited. Two girls with red hair walked in and took the two empty seats. _PEOPLE!_ Laura exclaimed in her head.

“Hi! I’m Laura! And this is Kirsch and Carmilla!” Laura said before the two girls got a chance to get comfortable. The curly haired girl gave a shy smile whilst the other smiled widely.

“I’m Susan. And this is Perry.” Susan greeted.

“Hi!” Kirsch greeted with the same enthusiasm. The four continued their conversation about what the teacher is going to be like, what they did over the summer, and Laura couldn’t help the excited fire bubbling in her stomach. It took everything she had to not act “weird” and burst out.

Suddenly, Laura spotted a tall girl with red hair. She looked like she didn’t have anywhere to sit, and Laura felt bad. With her friendly and caring nature, Laura wanted to help the girl.

“Hey! You!” Laura suddenly shouted over the chatter. Everyone at the table (including some other students) gave Laura a strange look that she didn’t seem to notice. Her only intent was to grab the attention of the strayed tall red head. To her luck, the girl turned. “Why don’t you sit with us?” Laura offered, pointing to (what she thought to be) an empty seat. The tall girl smiled and made her way over to the table. But she stopped when she saw Carmilla’s feet resting on the chair.

“Uh, do you mind moving your feet?” The tall girl said. Carmilla didn’t even bother to lift her gaze from her book.

“I do actually.” Carmilla replied. The tall girl scoffed.

“Do you think you’re better than me?” The tall girl threatened. Carmilla shrugged and turned a page in my book.

“Not necessarily. But I am more intelligent, so I do believe I have a right to do what I want.” Carmilla replied with the same arrogance Laura only knew to be a facade. Her extensive vocabulary seemed to shock the tall girl, and Laura knew she had to intervene.

Laura grabbed Carmilla’s feet and shoved them off the chair. The tall girl gave her a warm smile before sitting down.

“Thanks.” The tall red head said. “I’m Danny.”

“I’m Laura.” Laura greeted.

“Your hair reminds me of fire.” Kirsch suddenly said.

“Did someone say fire?” Susan added into the conversation. Laura smiled to herself. She did it; she made friends. Her mother would be so proud, and now she finally has something to tell her dad. 

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla was at Laura's house, swinging her duffle bag onto the floor. This is the first time Carmilla has slept over Laura's house, and she was beyond excited. This girl had a serious addiction to cookies, and was showing Carmilla all her secret hiding spots.

Laura lifted her yellow pillow and revealed a stash.

"I saved these for us!" Laura exclaimed, pulling them out and plopping down on the bed. Carmilla eyed the small bedroom as she made her way to the bed. 

The walls were painted a light yellow, two windows on the opposite wall to the door. White curtains hung to the windows, draping down a bit farther down the windowsill. Laura had a small bed pressed into one of the walls with colorful sheets and a dark wooden bed-frame. She had a closet with white doors, one of them broken and hanging loosely out to show a slither inside the closet. It was filled with an assortment of multi-colored clothing and a pile of messes. 

"I like your room." Carmilla said, taking a seat next to Laura.

"Thanks!" The girl said through a mouthful of food. "Cookie?" Carmilla smiled and took one of the treats out of the package, still eyeing the space.

Everything in Laura's house was so different compared to Carmilla's. Here, it was small and cozy, giving the real "home" feeling. Carmilla's was spacious and large, everything at least a foot apart. She liked how crammed it was; it gave her the security she never had. She never really had a home, and she knew it was supposed to be somewhere where you're safe and happy. That's at least what was said in all the literature she read.

Carmilla took a small bite into the cookie, careful not to spill any crumbs. Mother never liked messes- and messes meant punishment for Carmilla. Carmilla desperately cleaned up the crumbs falling, trying to keep the space tidy.

"Whatcha doing?" Laura asked, watching Carmilla work intently. 

"We can't leave any messes." Carmilla replied, determined to keep it spotless. 

"Pfft! Sure we can." Carmilla lifted her head to look at Laura.

"We can?" She asked, still unsure and afraid of punishment. Laura nodded her head.

"Mhm! My daddy will clean it up. It's his week on the chore wheel." Carmilla cocked an eyebrow.

"Chore wheel? Don't you have house maids?" Laura giggled.

"No silly! You clean up after yourself. That's how you learn to work hard." Laura announced, hopping to her feet and placing her hands on her hips. Carmilla tilted her head. 

"Doesn't your father punish you if you don't work hard?" Laura shook her head.

"Uh, no?" Carmilla blinked a few times. Is this how it's really supposed to be? Doesn't everything have to end in punishment? Laura leaned her elbow on Carmilla's shoulder. "You reward yourself for working hard. The only time for being mean is when you do something mean." Carmilla smiled, and took a bite out of Laura's cookie. "Hey!" Carmilla giggled.

"What? I was only rewarding myself." Laura broke out of her scrunched up angry face and laughed. 

"You play dirty."

"As dirty as your room." Laura laughed again and sat next to Carmilla. Carmilla realized that homes didn't have to be terrifying; that they are supposed to be somewhere you can go to break from the harshness of the world - a personal happy place.

Maybe Laura is Carmilla's home.

 

**Laura**

 

It was super late - like, _midnight_. Carmilla was tossing and turning in Laura's bed, and because of it Laura couldn't sleep. She was so excited to have Carmilla sleep over! Unfortunately though, they were now on the downfall of their sugar high, and Laura's dad told the girls to go to bed about 5 minutes ago. But Laura was too excited to even close her eyes, so she decided to tell something to her sleepy friend.

"Carm." Laura whispered, gently shaking Carmilla. She groaned in response. "Carm you wanna know a secret?" Carmilla opened one eye and peered at Laura for a moment. She grunted in response, and closed them again. "Oh come on, Carm! This is a big secret!" Carmilla sighed, and opened her eyes again.

"Why not?" Carmilla said, turning her body to look at Laura. Laura squealed and giddily hopped out of her bed. She went to her desk, and looked around to make sure no one was watching besides Carmilla. Then, Laura pulled out her secret hiding spot. She reached under her wooden desk and pulled out her small, red leather notebook. 

"What's that, cupcake?" Carmilla whispered. Laura smiled and plopped back down on the bed.

"Are you ready for my secret?" Laura asked, clutching the journal to her chest. She's never revealed this to anyone, but Carm is so... Trustworthy, and loyal. And she's really good at keeping secrets (mainly because she doesn't talk to a lot of people), so Laura knew she could tell her. Carmilla nodded her head, and Laura opened up her little book, showing her the writings inside. 

"What's all this?" Carmilla murmured, tracing her hand along the ink writing. Laura brought her hands up to Carmilla's ear, and did a double take again to make sure no one was listening.

"I'm a journalist." Laura pulled away and beamed at Carmilla, who raised their eyebrows. 

"That's..." Laura feared the worst; wondering if she'd pull out an insult. Laura was always made fun of, so it wouldn'tCarmilla smiled. "That's awesome. You should keep it up." Laura squealed out of excitement, and started sharing the stories behind the writings in the book. Carmilla listened to all of it, from why she wants to be a journalist (her mother was one), to the stories she's interested in, to why she never told anyone because she's scared she might be made fun of. Carmilla informed Laura that if anyone was mean to her, or bullied her, that she'd punch them in the face. Laura smiled, and continued to ramble on.

Laura realized that Carmilla will always keep her safe too.


	3. Their Spot and She Had To Shut Him Up Somehow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We do two time hops this chapter. The first one is later in the year and the kids are still in 3rd grade. It's Carmilla's birthday and it is Laura's mission to do something nice for her.  
> The second one is when Laura is 10 and Carmilla is 11. They go on a little adventure  
> In this chapter Lafontaine will be regarded with the incorrect pronouns of she/her and the name Susan, but this is ONLY because they don't know what non-binary is yet.  
> Hope you enjoy!

**Laura**

 

Laura had only ever met Mrs. Karnstein once in her life in her two years of friendship with Carmilla. It wasn't even on purpose; her dad had simply taken her to go grocery shopping with a promise of cookies. Laura's dad had recognized the woman, and when he tried to greet her she gave a tight lip smile and some excuse to leave. That was it, so deciding to drop off a present for Carmilla at her house meant possibly dealing with Mrs. Karnstein- and that terrified Laura. But her dad was driving her, so she felt safe enough to do so.

They pulled into the driveway of the large three-story home. Laura was a bundle of nerves and all too excited to deliver Carmilla her gift. It was a box of cookies and one of those friendship necklaces with half a heart. As cheesy and typical it looked to everyone else, Laura thought she was a genius. Laura knew that Carmilla hated her birthday; she hated parties, hated celebrations, and most of all hated receiving gifts. Laura only hoped it would go well and not blow up in her face.

Laura practically skipped up to the wooden blue door that sat in the center front of the home. She stood on her tippy toes and rang the doorbell, a moment later hearing it chime throughout the house. Laura was nervous, and she was going to try and make it quick. Carmilla never allowed Laura to her house, nor never invited her. Carmilla would always walk to Laura's, or allowed Laura to pick her up and pull into her driveway sometimes; but she was never allowed inside. Laura always wanted to press for information, but doing so always ended up with Carmilla being "mean", so Laura didn't push it.

Laura heard scurrying down the stairs and a few moments later, the door opened. Carmilla immediately grew pale-faced and her dark eyes widened. Laura extended her arms with the cookies into Carmilla's abdomen, causing the raven haired girl to let out a small "oof" from the force. 

"I got you this!" Laura exclaimed with a wide smile. Carmilla cautiously took the box of cookies, eyeing Laura suspiciously.

"Uh, thanks cupcake." Carmilla said with a lopsided smile. It was enough to encourage Laura to go on.

"And this!" Laura added, quickly shoving the small box with the necklace into Carmilla again, earning another small "oof" from the dark haired girl. Carmilla sighed and placed the cookies on a nearby table. She grabbed the box and eyed Laura carefully.

"You know I don't like gifts." Carmilla said in a low voice. Laura huffed. She was not taking no for an answer. Carmilla was going to open and receive this gift one way or another.

"Open it." Laura commanded. Carmilla's resistance to the gift was not enough to lower the never-ending energy of the caramel haired girl. Laura was so excited for Carmilla to receive her gift, that no amount of snark could bring that down. Carmilla stared down at the box for a moment, pondering over opening or not. But to Laura's delight, Carmilla slowly opened the box. With one pale hand she picked up the necklace and dangled it in front of her face. Laura couldn't contain her excitement anymore as she showed Carmilla the other half that clung tightly around Laura's neck. Carmilla smiled wide.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Laura exclaimed, not being able to contain the happiness inside of her. Carmilla was taken aback by the sudden shout, but soon giggled.

"Thanks!" Carmilla said with a wide grin. 

"Welcome!" Laura replied. "You have the best half, and I have the friends half." Laura added proudly. She knew Carmilla would be happy to be declared "best", even if that wasn't the original purpose. Laura brought Carmilla in for a bone crushing hug. Carmilla winced and stilled for a moment as she did with all their hugs, but eventually wrapped a loose arm around Laura's waist. Laura drew back and saw one of Carmilla's rare smiles. She wasn't sure why but it brought a weird feeling with a blush to her cheeks. 

"Thank you for the present, but you should go." Carmilla said, her smile slowly dissipating. Laura pouted but nodded.

"I'll see you in school, Carm." Laura replied. Laura kissed her friend's cheek and darted to the car, stumbling over a thousand words to her father as she talked about the exchange. Papa Hollis did his best to keep up, but it was useless from the amount of words per second coming out of Laura's mouth. 

She was glad to make Carmilla's birthday happy - even if it was with a cheap necklace and a box of cookies.

 

**Carmilla**

 

As soon as Laura left Carmilla immediately took her presents and darted to her room. She knew she would be in trouble if her mother found out someone had come to the house, and even worse if she had gotten gifts. Carmilla hid the box of cookies under her bed. She'd definitely be eating those when she knew her mother was fast asleep tonight.

Carmilla fiddled with getting the necklace around her neck for a bit, her tongue sticking out the corner of her mouth in concentration. _How do they do it in movies?_ Carmilla thought to herself as she struggled with the lock. It took a while for her to figure out that she should put the lock in her vision, then flip it back around so the half heart was facing the front again. Carmilla smiled for a moment as she looked in the mirror, playing with the necklace.

Normally, Carmilla hated gifts, feeling as though she didn't deserve them. She hated the sentimental value to a gift and the emotional moments shared between two people during the exchange. When she got a gift, it was usually from her mother. Whether being a hallmark letter that she simply added her name to, or a dress, and sometimes something like a way too expensive piece of jewelry- nothing with sentimental value. Compared to the necklaces she had, this looked to be something from the dollar tree. But to Carmilla, this was the best birthday gift she had ever received. It was only because Laura had given it to her.

Laura always made anything special.

 

_**TWO YEARS LATER** _

 

**Kirsch**

 

Carmilla arrived after her short walk to Laura's house- the last one to arrive to the party. It was a mini party, so to speak. It included Kirsch's favorite red heads, himself, and Laura and Carmilla. Kirsch was going to have the party at his place, but he ended up going to Laura's. They lived next door, so really it didn't matter. As long as he got to hang out with his friends - his real friends. Not his fake sport friends, or classmates - his true friends. Did he get made fun of for hanging out with all girls? Yes, but to Kirsch it didn't matter. He had fun with these guys - even if Danny could be a little mean to him, but he learned to take it with a grain of salt. Or was it take it with a grain of pepper? A gain of pepper? Kirsch was never good with metaphors.

"And she arrives!" Susan says sarcastically. Or at least Kirsch thinks that was sarcasm. He just learned the word from Carmilla in class yesterday, so he was trying to use it. 

The group was out in Laura's backyard on her porch, sitting at a table and talking about whatever cross their minds. There were some party assortments Kirsch had brought over. The usual stuff, you know: Soda, chips, more soda, more chips. His mom suggested maybe bringing something a little more healthy, but Kirsch shrugged it off and carried the bags of chips in one hand and the sodas in the other. Kirsch had big hands. And big arms. And big legs.

Kirsch was just overall a big guy.

Kirsch ran up to Carmilla and forced her into a bear hug as he picked her up. Carmilla squirmed in his arms and made empty threats as she swung her fists against his shoulder. Kirsch simply laughed, and set the broody girl back down on the ground. 

Kirsch liked Carmilla. He can recall a few times where she let her guard down and cheered him up, so she was legit. Kirsch has known her since who knows how long. He can't count the numbers in his head. All he knows is that he, Laura, and Carmilla are the OG's. At least in his book they were. And no amount of red heads will stop him from treating Laura and Carmilla like his younger sisters (which that is what they were like to him; especially Laura). 

"Let's play a game!" Laura suddenly announced giddily. Kirsch smiled. He always loved games- no matter the type.

"Okay!" Kirsch exclaimed, matching her enthusiasm. They were followed by a few more agreements and a grunt from Carmilla. One time Kirsch recorded Carmilla's grunt and made it her ringtone. Now every time she grunts she makes sure Kirsch isn't holding some iPod, and it never failed to make Kirsch laugh.

"What game?" Perry asked. Laura tapped her forefinger to her chin (Kirsch will never get over how small every feature of Laura Hollis is; even her hands. Seriously she was like a doll.)

"Hide and Go Seek!" Laura said.

"Okay. What are the teams?" Susan asked. In Kirsch's mind, Susan was the smartest person he ever met. She did like Science and stuff, so whatever team she was on he wanted to be with. He adored her and made no attempts to hide it, which only caused her to laugh and say she's no genius. (But to Kirsch she has yet to prove otherwise. Or at least prove she's not a wizard, which Kirsch is also convinced she is. But he'll conduct his investigation at a later time). 

"What about me, Carmilla, and Perry?" Laura suggested. 

"Perry, Carmilla, and I." Carmilla corrected. Laura rolled her eyes.

"Yes!" Kirsch exclaimed all too quickly. 

"Okay. We go hide, and you guys seek." Laura said. Kirsch nodded, and headed inside with Danny and Susan to count to 120 seconds. He also liked the idea of being on a team with Danny. He was competitive, and she was competitive; it would be best if they were on the same team instead of opposing ones.

 

**Laura**

 

Carmilla and Laura were wandering about the yard with Perry, looking for the best hiding spots. There weren't many - well, at least where you could sprint away easily if you were spotted. Laura noticed Carmilla looked to the trees across the road, and she couldn't help but wonder what her friend was thinking. 

"Let's go hide in the forest!" Carmilla suddenly exclaimed, and Perry looked like she just saw a ghost. Perry rapidly shook her head.

"No. No way! That is too dangerous." Perry refused. Carmilla frowned, and suddenly Laura wanted to wash away the pout. She hated seeing Carmilla being anything but happy; even if it's for a moment.

"Oh come on Perry. Don't be a Debby downer." Carmilla replied sourly.

"I'm not leaving this yard." Perry said, crossing her arms. Carmilla sighed. Laura wanted to wipe away her friend's disappointment. But did Laura really dare venture into the forest that she'd used to get lost in?

"Fine." Carmilla said with a huff. Yes. If that meant she could show Carmilla that she was just as brave. If that meant Carmilla wouldn't be disappointed, then yes. Laura always took extra care to Carmilla. The girl was all too mopey most of the time, and Laura always was determined to turn that frown upside down. 

"I'll go to the forest." Laura suddenly proclaimed. Carmilla's eyes brightened as she turned to her best friend of nearly 5 years. The brightness in Carmilla's eyes was worth the terror that came with the announcement.

"You will?" Carmilla exclaimed. Laura nodded, and grabbed Carmilla's hand in fear they have already wasted too much time by talking. Laura knew that Kirsch and Danny had long legs, and no doubt in a couple steps they could capture Laura.

"We gotta hurry though!" Laura said as she started sprinting down the street and into the nearby forest. The two girls ignored the looks Perry gave them as they headed into the confusing greens and tall trees.

 

  **Carmilla**

 

Carmilla let Laura lead her through the thick underbrush of the forest. Laura knew it far better than Carmilla, so she trusted her. They dodged a hoard of thorns and jumped over a bush.

"So where are we going?" Carmilla decided to ask, following Laura's every move.

"I don't know." Laura replied. A branch came close to smacking Carmilla's face, but she ducked just in time.

"You don't know?!" Carmilla exclaimed. Laura squeezed Carmilla's hand and suddenly she didn't care where they were going. A branch threatened to hit the smaller girl's head, and Carmilla forced Laura to duck, Carmilla taking the blow instead. Carmilla pretended that it she didn't get whacked, not wanting Laura to worry as she ventured her way through the trees. Laura can live with not knowing Carmilla took a brach to the face for her.

"Wait I think there's something up there." Laura said, eyes trained ahead. Carmilla groaned but allowed herself to be dragged away by the smaller girl. Laura leapt over a bush, and Carmilla did so with much less grace. Laura suddenly tugged Carmilla to the side, preventing her from running into a thorn bush she couldn't see. The trees were starting to thin and space out, and Carmilla could see something ahead. 

Suddenly, there was a clearing from the trees and untamed branches. It was sort of like a meadow, but smaller. Long grass shrouded the clearing of trees, and up ahead Carmilla could see what looked like to be an abandoned wooden structure. Laura and Carmilla exchanged a glance, and decided to walk ahead. As they trudged near, they could see that it was a ground-level tree house.

"Oh cool!" Laura exclaimed. The two girls took off running to the trees house. It only took a couple of strides until they were there. The tree house was small; the wood rotting a bit. The structure was slightly perched up on a curve in a tree; a mini ladder leading up to it. Deciding that the ladder probably wasn't as sturdy as it seemed, Carmilla lifted Laura up on her shoulder and allowed the girl to climb inside. Carmilla decided to sacrifice herself in climbing the ladder, to both of their surprises, didn't collapse into a two-foot fall tragedy. Carmilla scurried in after Laura, and inside were a few bugs and lots of foliage from the trees, but nothing too terrible. Laura took Carmilla's hand again as they examined their surroundings.

"Whoa." The girls said in unison. It was small enough for the girls to stand in, being about about a foot above their heads. There were carvings on the wood, weird drawings, dates, and phrases. Some of them were etched out, but it was clear a child used to come here. It was creepy, and a little eerie, but Carmilla liked that. And apparently so did Laura. 

"I wonder what happened to the last person in here." Laura said, tracing a carving with her hand. Carmilla shrugged and sat down on the floor, crossing her ankles and pulling her knees to her chest.

"Probably murdered." Carmilla teased. Laura squeaked a little but playfully kicked Carmilla's foot. Carmilla simply laughed and scooted so Laura could sit next to her. The caramel haired girl dusted off her hands and plopped down next to Carmilla.

"It's so creepy in here... But so cool." Laura said in awe. Carmilla looked to Laura, finding it adorable how invested she was in this tiny place.

"You should do your next Journalist Case on this tree house." Carmilla suggested, resting her head on Laura's shoulder. Laura shook her head, and grabbed Carmilla's hand.

"With a tree-house like this, I think the mystery will be better." Carmilla smiled, and the girls went on to talk about how they're totally going to win this game, and how no one will find them. 

This became known as "their spot".

 

**Danny**

 

Danny was kneeling in the bushes in the backyard. She saw Perry running to her next hiding spot, and she was ready to pounce. She was going to wait for Perry to stop at her destination, then sneak over and tag her before she had a chance to escape. Perry was surprisingly sneaky, so if she heard/saw Danny coming over, theres no doubt she would sneak away before Danny had a chance. 

Perry stopped behind a rock, and Danny smiled. She was ready to attack when -

"Danny!" She heard a harsh whisper. She whirled around so fast her hair whacked the fending whisperer. The large boy spat her hair out of his mouth, and nearly fell on his butt.

"Kirsch! What the heck!" Danny whispered back. She would've been annoyed if it was anyone who ruined her moment. But the fact that it was Kirsch was only fuel to the flame. 

"Sorry! I couldn't find Susan and I didn't want to be alone." He said, looking like a kicked puppy. Danny somehow found the pity in her for Kirsch, and sighed.

"Fine. But will you shut up! Now I have to wait for Perry's next move." Danny said, returning her gaze to the backyard. 

"Right." He whispered. He pressed his hands to his knees and was still for about .2 seconds before his energy got the better of him. He moved to a kneeling position, to standing, to laying down, to leaning on Danny, to kneeling again. And wow it's interesting how he can flex his calves like that, and boy oh boy aren't these leaves interesting? Maybe plucking them will be cool too, but wait now he has to stand. Nope, now he's kneeling again. Finally, Danny had had enough.

"Would you stop moving!" She whispered harshly. 

"I can't. I don't have to... Patient? Pat... Patent? The..." Danny huffed.

"Patience."

"The patience for this! I mean it's one thing I have to keep quiet, but I can't move either?" She rolled her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"I swear to god you're like a puppy. Just kneel down next to me and keep your mouth shut." 

"Okay." Kirsch knelt on one leg, his other popping out in front of him. He rested his elbow on his knee and let his arm drape down in front of him, his hand nervously fidgeting. Danny rolled her eyes. This kid is going to be the death of her. She was surprised when he remained silent and still, but it only lasted so long. "You know, I actually saw something like this in a movie once." Danny rolled her eyes. "They were like in war or something, and they watched the enemies from the hill. They spotted them and were like: two tangos! Or whatever they call them and-"

"Kirsch!" Danny exclaimed, trying her best to keep her voice down. "Shut up."

"Right... Sorry." Danny was relieved to find it was quiet. But that could only last so long. "You know, my mom actually thinks I have ADD or something. I got tested for it, but turns out I don't. It's just my brain." He scooted in closer. "Brains are weird like that. Like did you know if you hit your brain the wrong way all your memories can be gone? That's insane!" Danny started to get more and more aggravated as he went on, clenching her jaw and trying her best to ignore him. "It's so bizarre! Your brain can do so much! Like talking right now is all from my brain. My brain is telling my mouth to do so, and saying words! It's insane!" Finally, Danny had enough. She grabbed the boy's head in her hands and kissed him without really thinking about it. As she pulled back, the realization hit her and her cheeks turned red. But she was quickly distracted when she saw Perry sprinting out of the corner of her eye.

"There she goes! Time to move!" Danny said, grabbing Kirsch's hand and running to cut Perry off. She just kissed a boy. She really just kissed a boy... Danny shook it off. Whatever. She did it to shut him up.

Danny couldn't stop the smile forming on her cheeks as she ran hand in hand with Kirsch.


	4. It Must Be A Best Friend Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We do a time hop again where Laura is 11 and Carmilla is 12. Laura and Carmilla are at a sleepover with the ginger squad. Enjoy!

**Carmilla**

 

 _I can't believe I let her drag me into this_. Carmilla thought to herself. Originally, Carmilla was supposed to have a sleepover with just Laura. But Danny had invited her, the ginger twins, and Laura to a sleepover. Carmilla had no clue why she was invited in the first place; well she does. Being friends with Laura meant getting invited to these types of things. Even then, Danny inviting Carmilla was bizarre.

Danny and Carmilla always had an underlying hate from the first time they met- no doubt there. They only tried to get along because of Laura. Carmilla wasn't really close with the rest of the group either. Well, on a certain level she was close with them. They were friends, but Carmilla only talked to them in school. This year, Laura and Carmilla weren't in the same class. She had some with the ginger squad, so she was sort of forced to make friends and talk. Though, they weren't terrible. (Carmilla would never admit that out loud however).

Carmilla has also been pushing Laura away a bit. Carmilla gets this strange feeling when she's around Laura, and she's not sure what it is but she knows it freaks her out. But when Laura's big brown eyes stare into hers, Carmilla can't help but let the feelings go free. She always found herself not being able to avoid Laura anyhow as she was always so persistent, and Carmilla needed that. No amount of weird feelings will keep Carmilla away from Laura for too long.

"Oh come on Carm, don't pout." Laura said as she grabbed Carmilla's hand. Carmilla's cheeks did that peculiar thing where they turned red and her stomach had that weird feeling again. It was such an odd feeling, really. She was happy, confused, but at the same time weirded out.

"You know Danny doesn't like me." Carmilla grumbled as she let herself get dragged away to the front steps of the Lawrence's home. 

"Yes she does! She told me so." Laura replied, ringing the doorbell. _Telling you so doesn't mean she means it._ Carmilla thought in her head. But she bit her tongue to prevent herself from saying such. She didn't want to ruin another sleepover. The last attempt ended up with Danny shoving Carmilla into a wall. But Carmilla was already frustrated because Susan was plucking at her hair all night for "scientific reasons"- whatever that was supposed to mean. And when Danny had tried to tell Laura what to do, Carmilla got just that more angrier and said some cruel comments. Yeah, Carmilla definitely regrets that.

Hopefully this one goes better.

The door swung open and out came the Amazon's mother, who was a tall red head as well. She greeted them with a warm smile and gestured them inside. The two girls kicked off their shoes and went to the basement where the three were already hanging out. They were welcomed as they placed their bags with everyone else's. 

"Hey guys!" Danny greeted. 

"Hey!" Laura said, waving her hand. Carmilla replied with a grunt, practically hiding in Laura's shadow. The three redheads were on the floor in a circle, and Laura was quick to join them, immediately plopping down next to Danny. Carmilla took a seat in the small circle close to Laura. Some pop music was playing quietly on the TV, an assortment of soda's displayed on a small coffee table pushed a bit away so there was space on the floor, a bowl of chips placed in the middle of the circle. _Well,_ theres _a good enough reason to be here_. Carmilla thought as she began to devour the chips.

Eventually, everyone settled in. Hours passed as the time slowly drew nearing to 11. It was that time during a sleepover where everyone was relaxed, and slowly easing into a heart to heart. Carmilla always hated that part unless it was Laura speaking. Carmilla had learned a lot about Laura during those hours of a sleepover. She learned that Laura never really knew her mother, and how Laura felt bad that she doesn't feel sad about her mother dying; only at the fact that she doesn't have a mother. Carmilla learned that Laura wants to be some sort of a Journalist when she was older, and that she wants to live in London. Her favorite color is yellow; though that never surprised Carmilla. She learned why Laura would always ask if she was being annoying (caused by some jerk named Rachel called her annoying, saying why thats why she had no friends), why Laura loved pop culture, why she idolized Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She was always interesting to Carmilla, and she wondered how and why Laura even bothered to maintain friends with her. She'd worry about that later. Right now, she just needed to get past the inevitable heart to heart. 

"Do you have any crushes?" Perry asked Danny giddily, clasping her hands together. Danny blushed a bit at the sudden attention and shook her head. 

"No... But... I've kissed a boy." Danny admitted. The room was filled with gasps from the ginger twins and Laura, but Carmilla couldn't care less. A silence hung over the room for a moment.

"What was it like?" Laura asked, her mouth gaping and her attention full on Danny. Danny shrugged. 

"It was nice." Danny said sheepishly. Carmilla rolled her eyes. She was always disinterested in boy talk. She didn't care which boy was the cutest or who had a crush on who. Really, sometimes was a little concerned with her complete lack on interest in boys, but then again Carmilla was never one to roll with the crowd.

"Boys are immature." Carmilla said, completely unaffected by Danny's truth bomb. The attention turned to her and Carmilla wished she had kept her mouth shut. Danny glared at Carmilla, and opened her mouth to speak when Susan spoke instead.

"I think I want to be a boy." Susan suddenly said. And the attention shifted to her. The room fell silent for a moment. Susan had her knees hugged to her chest, staring blankly at the floor.

"What do you mean?" Perry asked. Everyone seemed a little shocked, though this was nothing new. Some kid in their grade announced that they were a boy, and the whole school had a lecture on what that meant. The boy was happy now with his identity, and Carmilla was glad the none of her friends had an issue with this gender thing. 

"I don't know. I don't want to be a girl." Susan said, shrugging her shoulders. Carmilla was emotionally intelligent enough to know that this was serious, and was not the time for snarky comments, but instead acceptance and sympathy. That much she can do for her friend.

"Do you want us to call you something different then?" Carmilla offered. The kid that said he wanted to be a boy changed his name, so Carmilla figured she could do as much. 

"Yeah, I think I'd like that." Susan said. "But I don't want it to be a boy's name, because I'm not sure if I'm a boy."

"What do you want us to call you then?" Laura asked with that smile that could warm the coldest of hearts. Susan pondered the thought for a moment, shifting his or her lips from side to side. 

"Lafontaine. I want to be called Lafontaine." Lafontaine announced. The girls nodded patiently with words of encouragement. 

"Do we start calling you a boy?" Perry asked. Carmilla could clearly see that Perry was uncomfortable with the situation, but she could also see she was trying. As long as she was trying, Carmilla wasn't going to bite her head off. But one wrong move and Carmilla would not hesitate to protect Sus- Lafontaine.

"I don't think I want to be a boy, but I don't want to be a girl either." Lafontaine announced with a small pout. Carmilla sighed, and recalled something from the lecture. She hoped she wasn't going to regret adding to this heart to heart.

"Are you non- binary?" Carmilla asked, trying to sound sympathetic but look disaffected. 

"What's that?" Laura chimed in with a curious gaze to Carmilla. 

"It's when you're not a boy or a girl. You use they/them pronouns." Carmilla replied, gazing over to Lafontaine. Lafontaine smiled widely at the knowledge.

"I think I'd like that." Lafontaine said, perking up a bit. Carmilla offered one of her rare smiles, and Lafontaine knew better than to make a big deal out of it, because they knew this was a rare sighting. They smiled shyly back as if to say thanks. Well, maybe if Ginger One was happy with themselves, contributing to a heart to heart isn't so bad. Just as long as Carmilla isn't dragged into it and spilling her secrets.

Somewhere along the way gender was dropped, and instead they looped back to the topic of kissing. All eyes were on Danny as she talked about her kiss, and even Carmilla showed an interest. _It's just a kiss_. Carmilla wanted to say, but she knew she just hated the fact that Laura was giving Danny so much attention. So she bit her tongue long enough until Perry spoke up.

"Has anyone else had a kiss?" She asked the group. There was a unison of no's and shaking of heads. Laura turned back to Danny, and Carmilla couldn't take it past that. Kisses were dumb. Not important enough for Laura to ignore Carmilla and give all of her attention to Xena.

"Whys a first kiss so special anyway?" Carmilla blurted out, staring at her folded hands. She never understood why it was such a big deal. Why the hype that was affiliated with a kiss was there in the first place. Yet again, she's never kissed anyone. So how is she to know?

"Because it's a first kiss!" Laura said, giving Carmilla a playful shove. "It's romantic, it's passion! It's-"

"Everything a first kiss is not?" Carmilla replied, causing Laura to pout. Carmilla couldn't help but smirk at Laura's reaction. 

"I think you're just being grumpy because you've never been kissed before." Danny teased. Carmilla turned her eyes to glare at Danny, who had a challenging smirk tugging at her lips. _Oh it's on, Xena._  

"That has nothing to do with it. I just believe they are over analyzed in the media. They really are no big deal." Carmilla said, trying to build up her argument in her head before Danny could finish her sentence. 

"I thought it was a big deal. Everyone thinks their first kiss is a big deal because it is. A first kiss is the doorway to so many other things." Danny retorted. _Well, crap._

"That must be false. It's only made to be such a big deal only to contribute to the economy." Carmilla wasn't just about to let Danny win; even if she was wrong. And if that meant she had to use big words and fake proposals, then so be it. "I mean ponder over it for a moment. Where would the media be without that lovely first kiss? There would be no love songs, no rom coms, no imbecilic teenage movies, and certainly no hallmark gift cards. I mean really it's just to build up a hype in people in order to add some contribution to the economy. Truly, it's idiotic and unrealistic." Really, Carmilla was just spewing out crap, crap, and more crap with big words. But to Carmilla, seeing Danny's smirk get wiped off of her face was totally worth it.

"Whatever." Danny said, and Carmilla couldn't help but feel offended that she completely disregarded her argument. Carmilla even used her extensive vocabulary. Danny should be impressed. Carmilla was about to speak up on the matter again, when Danny's mother called downstairs.

"Kids! Time to go to bed!" Danny's mother said. Everyone groaned and shuffled to their sleeping bags on the floor. Carmilla and Laura were tucked next to a couch, slightly moved away from everyone else. It was about that time when they would slowly die off on their sugar highs anyway, and Carmilla was grateful that she was stopped in her argument with Danny. Because once Carmilla got started, it was hard for her to stop. She always had to have the last word, and always had to be right.

It was about 1 AM when everyone was passed out- well, almost everyone. Carmilla hasn't slept a wink due to Laura's constant tossing and turning. Carmilla sighed. Maybe the heart to hearts weren't over yet. For the First Time by The Script was playing quietly off the TV, and Carmilla had seriously considered turning it off before talking to Laura, but she feared she might wake the others. So, with another huff she cleared her throat.

"Cupcake." Carmilla whispered softly, scooting closer in her sleeping bag next to Laura. 

"Mhm?" Laura replied, giving one last turn so she was facing Carmilla. In her years of friendship with Laura, she knew when Laura was upset. This was definitely one of those times.

"What's wrong?" Carmilla asked. She saw a flash of something behind Laura's eyes before she pretended she was fine again.

"Nothing's wrong. I'm fine." Laura replied bluntly. She went to turn, but Carmilla placed her hand on Laura's shoulder and stopped her. Carmilla's patience was running thin due to her weariness, but Laura came first. 

"Just tell me so you'll stop all this tossing and turning." Carmilla said with clear annoyance. Laura cringed a little, and Carmilla felt bad for her carelessness. So in a weird make-up gesture, she started tucking strands of Laura's hair behind her ear. 

"You're going to think it's stupid." Laura retaliated, easing into the touch. 

"I find everything stupid. What's wrong?" Carmilla pressed. Laura let out an exasperated sigh and continued to let Carmilla tuck her hair behind her ear. 

"I'm worried my first kiss won't be... Special." Laura said. Okay. Laura was right. Carmilla did find this completely and utterly stupid. _Laura's losing sleep over a silly problem like this?_  

"It doesn't have to be special cutie. It could just be with someone you care about. After all, it's just a kiss." Carmilla said, and suddenly she felt a blush to her cheeks. Associating the word "kiss" with Laura sent that weird feeling in her stomach. Those weird feelings came back again. The feelings in her stomach, the breathlessness, the heat to her cheeks and that overwhelming feeling in her chest that caused her to take a deep breath. Carmilla saw Laura gulp nervously.

"Can it... Can it be with you?" The words made Carmilla's stomach tumble and her head spin. _Can it what? Me? Her? KISS?_ Carmilla was too busy flirting with the thought in her mind to pay attention to Laura's reaction. "I mean. You don't have to." That was enough to get Carmilla talking again.

"No." Carmilla blurted out too quickly for her liking. Carmilla cleared her throat and recollected herself in an attempt to calm down, but to no avail. "It can." Carmilla was the one to gulp nervously this time. Laura fluttered her lashes a few times.

"After all it's just a kiss, right?" Laura said. There was a glimmer in her eyes that made Carmilla's heart pound in her chest. Is her heart okay? It needs to stop doing that.

"Just a kiss." Carmilla repeated. Carmilla realized her hand was caressing Laura's cheek (when did that happen?) and it made her palms sweat. The girls stared at each other for a long moment, looking into each other's eyes. They were both too scared to take action, and if it was just a kiss why was Carmilla acting this way? A few moments passed before either said anything.

"Um. Close your eyes." Laura said. Carmilla looked at Laura's lips for a moment, but squeezed them shut. She felt Laura's head move beneath her hand and suddenly, a pair of soft lips were pressing against hers. It felt like an explosion was happening all around. Carmilla's thoughts were shooting every which way like a game of pin ball. Her heat was beating fast, and suddenly she couldn't breath. That feeling in her stomach became intense, doing summer salts. Hell, performing a whole entire gymnastic show. Carmilla felt that overwhelming feeling again. She felt as though she could bust at that very moment. Her hands shook a bit, and her body felt like complete jello. Carmilla felt cool air touch her lips and her eyes opened only to see Laura's warm brown ones. Laura smiled softly.

"Goodnight Carm." She whispered, staring at Carmilla for a moment. Laura turned around before Carmilla could reply. She listened to the song For the First Time and indulged on the fireworks exploding inside of her.

Maybe first kisses were a big deal after all.

 

_**THE NEXT DAY** _

  
**Laura**

 

Laura woke up holding hands with Carmilla, and for a moment everything was normal. For a moment, Laura was simply waking up at a sleepover. But the very next, she realized she had kissed Carmilla. Carmilla had kissed her and she had kissed Carmilla. The scene replayed in Laura's head followed by an overwhelming feeling in her chest that caused her to take a deep breath.

Was she feeling panicked? Happy? Scared? Too many emotions jumbled up into one, and she'd definitely have to talk to Perry about this. She'd talk to Danny, but Danny was always too over protective of Laura, and she'd probably say something along the lines of being careful. Laura didn't need that. She'd talk to Susan but- Laura sighed. Lafontaine. She'd talk to Lafontaine but she knew they'd have that "I know something you don't know" grin, and really Laura didn't want to deal with that. She'd talk to Carmilla, but... Yeah.

Perry it is.

Laura carefully released Carmilla's slender hand and sneaked over to Perry's sleeping bag. Laura thought a spy should definitely be one of her career choices because dang- she was really good at crawling silently. 

Laura gently shook Perry's shoulder, but Perry was already awake. Oh right- Perry's a morning person. 

"Why are you awake?" Perry asked. Laura shrugged and motioned her to an empty sub-room with a couch. Perry nodded, and the two girls crawled their way over to the couch. Laura looked over the wall to make sure no one was awake, and took a seat next to Perry. _How do I start?_ Laura wondered to herself. Maybe she should just spill the beans and get it over with. That's how her dad always taught her to handle things. Never to "beat around the bush"- whatever that phrase meant. 

"If I tell you something, do you promise not to tell anyone? Not even Su-" Laura sighed. This was going to take some getting used to, but it was worth it if it meant her friend was happy. "Not even Lafontaine?" Perry nodded slowly, and with that Laura took a deep breath. _Well, here goes nothing._

And with that, Laura told Perry the whole entire kissing ordeal, but once she started she couldn't stop.

She divulged into the weird feelings she's been having for Carmilla, and how she's not exactly sure what they mean. She told Perry about how happy she is when she's with Carmilla- not that she's unhappy when she's with her other friends, but a different kind of happy. Perry listened intently, absorbing every word Laura was spewing out. It was times like these when Laura was grateful to have a friend like Perry. Sure she could be bossy, or a control freak, but in the end she was a good listener and a caring friend- and that's what Laura needed right now.

"I think I get what you mean." Perry said.

"Really?" Laura said, a little relieved she's not alone. Perry nodded.

"Mhm. I feel the same way towards Susan. I mean, Lafontaine." Perry took a big huff. She's not the only one struggling to make their friend happy. "Maybe its a some sort of, um," Perry motioned her hand as her voice did that thing where it slowly raised an octave, "a best friend thing." Perry said with a smile. 

"Maybe. Do all best friends kiss each other?" Laura said. Perry pursed her lips and thought about it for a moment.

"No. At least I don't think so. I've had thoughts of kissing Su-" Another huff. "Lafontaine. I think it's just a best friend thing." And with that, the two girls left it alone.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla heard Perry and Laura quietly chatting in the next room, but she hadn't a clue what. All Carmilla could think about was the fact that she had her first kiss. She understands all those love songs now, those romantic books, those weird hallmark cars and poems about love. But she didn't quite understand why it was with Laura. No. She should be having these feelings for a boy, right? Not a girl. 

Carmilla sighed. She needed to tell someone about this- anyone. And her only options were Xena and Lafontaine. She was not about to let Xena know that she agreed that first kisses may be a big deal, nor that she had one with Laura. Lafontaine it is. 

Carmilla scooted down to Lafontaine's bag, and shook their shoulder. They groaned, and Carmilla wasn't having the patience for this.

"Get up, dimwit." Carmilla whispered harshly. They groaned again, and Carmilla rolled her eyes. "Lafontaine. Come on. Get up." Lafontaine's eyes shot open and they looked up to Carmilla, a twinkle in their eyes. They smiled.

"Hey, uh... Thank you for last night. I-" Carmilla held up her hand. She hated being thanked, or even remotely being worshipped in anyway. 

"Don't mention it. I could use your help though, if you feel you need to return some sort of favor." Carmilla said as nonchalantly as she could. Lafontaine nodded and propped themselves up on their elbows, seeing that Laura and Perry weren't there.

"Yeah. Of course." Carmilla took a deep breath, and made sure Xena was still sleeping. How does she go about saying this? She knows Lafontaine won't judge, but yet again... Should she just say it? She should. Just out with it- just do it. _Here goes nothing._

"I kissed Laura." Lafontaine's eyes grew four times their size and their jaw dropped.

"YOU W-" Carmilla muffled Lafontaine with her palm, nervously looking around.

"SH!" Carmilla hissed. Lafontaine nodded, and she slowly lowered her hand. 

"What happened?" They asked. Carmilla took a deep breath. _What did happen?_

Carmilla made a thorough, bashful explanation of these past few months and the strange feelings she's been having around Laura. She explained how she related to romantic media only when she thought of Laura, and how she thought she was supposed to be having these feelings for boys, but maybe not. She went on to their kiss, before and after. Lafontaine listened intently.

"I think I understand how you're feeling." They said. Carmilla brightened up a bit. So much relief and comfort came over her from hearing those simple words. Validation- something she always craved.

"You do?" Lafontaine nodded.

"I get those feelings for Perry sometimes. I'm sure it's just one of those best friend things. I mean you and Laura are really close after all, like Perry and I. So it must be that- maybe. I'll have to run a few tests." Carmilla nodded. Normally, she'd hate Lafontaine's experiments. But right now, it's the only thing she has to figuring out what exactly is going on.

And she really needs that right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lafontaine figured it out! Hurrah!
> 
> Also, funny story. I started to realize I was prob not straight when a girl on my soccer team held my hand and pulled me away from an incoming soccer ball that would've broken my nose. And when I got to my mom's car For the First Time was playing and all I could think about was how she held my hand and you know, that sort of "WHAT AM I FEELING" type of panic.  
> Anyway, hope you enjoyed the Hollstein fluff. More to come soon!  
> Thanks for the comments and Kudos!!


	5. I Think I Like Girls. Well, A Girl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So its now the summer, months later since the last chapter. Young Laura Hollis is now 12 and Carmilla is 13. They're getting ready to have the best summer of their lives, when Carmilla receives bad news. What's in stock for the girls?

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla had just arrived home, and was surprised to see her mother and older brother sitting at the kitchen, deep in discussion. Will slammed his hand on the table and stormed upstairs, shoving past Carmilla. That was the third cue that something was definitely wrong.

The first being that her mother was home this early during a Weekday.  
The second being that William was home from military school.  
The third being he stormed off to his room without even greeting Carmilla. 

Her mother's empty blue eyes gazed coldly at Carmilla before an empty smile met her lips. Carmilla's seen this look- this is what she does when she thinks she should be showing a human emotion. She patted the barstool next to her.

"Come sit Carmilla." Carmilla's mother said in that sickly sweet tone that made her stomach churn. Carmilla's heart started to beat fast as she wondered if she did something wrong. _I've been careful_ , Carmilla thought to herself. _I haven't done anything wrong- or at least so I think. Oh God, please let it be nothing._

Carmilla found her feet working against her as she cautiously made her way to the barstool. She placed her book bag down on the table and eyed her mother. Her mother stared at her for a moment, sending an unpleasant shiver down her spine. Carmilla could feel all the places she's ever hurt her, the suffocating feeling of being locked in her gaze. Carmilla felt her necklace in her pocket and she started to calm down, memories of Laura pushing out the bad ones.

She's held onto this necklace since the first time Laura gave it to her. Carmilla never went anywhere without it; never did anything without it. It helped with the mistreatment, as in some weird way it felt as though Laura was there. Laura- the girl who made everything right. Laura- who shared Carmilla's first kiss. Laura- who's smile is so bright it could replace the sun and no one would know the difference. Carmilla felt more calm thinking of the girl, and prepared herself for whatever her mother was to do.

"I have news." Carmilla's mother said in a low voice. Carmilla gulped and blinked nervously. _Was "news" good or was news bad? Which one led to the beatings again?_ Carmilla couldn't remember as all she focus on was her mother's stone expression and fake smile.

"What news?" Carmilla murmured. She could tell her mother wanted to yell at her to speak up, and she was about to correct herself when her mother cut her off.

"We're moving again." Carmilla's mother said, the words piercing the air like a sharp blade to the skin. Carmilla could feel her heart drop to the pit of her stomach. Moving? No, she can't move. This is the longest she's ever stayed anywhere. This is where Laura is- this is where home is. This is the first place where she's ever felt safe, where she's actually made real friends. They can't move now- not when things are finally starting to piece together.

"We can't move." Carmilla found herself saying out loud. Carmilla's mother cocked her head.

"Is this because of that Hollis girl?" Carmilla's heart sunk even more at the mention of her name. She promised Laura lots of adventures this summer. Lost of sleep overs, lots of talks, lots of hanging out. This was going to be a great summer before Laura became a teen; a great summer as Carmilla began to be a teen. 

"No mother." Carmilla said through gritted teeth. Her mother gave Carmilla's forearm a tight squeeze, just hard enough to hurt, but not hard enough to leave a mark. Carmilla closed her eyes and waited for the pain to end.

"Good. You know she was never your real friend anyway." The words stung like alcohol on a open wound. Carmilla bit her tongue and fumbled with the necklace in her pocket. _That's not true._

"Yes mother." Carmilla quietly obeyed. The pain on her arm was finally gone, and she wished it was as easy to get rid of the pain in her heart. Carmilla's mother patted Carmilla's head and rose from her barstool. Her mother started to straighten out her blazer, making sure she was perfect.

"We're departing in a week. I suggest you begin packing your things and clear away any friendships you believe you may have." And with a wave of her mother's hand, her mother left. Carmilla sat there for a moment, completely stunned. She darted up the stairs and went to go to her room, but then she remembered her brother was home. Right now, Carmilla didn't have to be alone. And right now, she didn't want to. She welcomed herself in and laid down on the end of his bed.

"Just a few more weeks and I'll be in the military." Will said. "Just a few more weeks and I'll be a legal adult." He added proudly. Will went to a boarding military school. It started off as a punishment when Will was younger, but he started to like the strict lifestyle. And Carmilla hated that. She knew it also had to do with their dad being in the military, and Carmilla hated that as well. She never knew much of her father; just that when he was home he was an alcoholic. She couldn't bare the thought of Will turning out the same way. Of Will turning into a strict man who's only way to show affection was a slight nod. He already looked like their father in ways; and Carmilla hated that too. She hated that he was going to leave her like everyone else has and will.

"Just a few more weeks and you'll be gone..." Carmilla muttered. She hadn't told William of mother's abuse. She was planning to the day before he left. Carmilla's always had that plan from the moment she learned he was going to join the military. The only reason she never told him was in fear that he'd drop everything once he turned 18 and take care of Carmilla, and that might mean leaving here. But now that she was leaving, what did it matter anyway?

"I'll be back for holidays." William said in some attempt to comfort her. Carmilla crawled up next to her older brother and rested her head on his chest. 

"Just holidays." Carmilla said dismally. Will sighed, and oh how she was going to miss him. She's dealt with Will living at a boarding school for most of her life; it's why she's so fond of and used to being alone. But she sure as hell missed him- even when he was here.

"Look, I know you're going to miss me Kitty. I'm going to miss you too. But it's what I want, okay? And mother isn't that bad. She can be a raging bitch, but it's nothing you can't handle." Carmilla bit her lip and fought back tears. _You can't do this now, Carmilla. Let him be happy for once_. _Let him be happy for the while he's home._

"Yeah..." Carmilla murmured. _Good. Now switch the topic._ "Hey, can I tell you something?" Carmilla asked. She's been thinking about this for a while too, for a really long while. She's spent many hours talking about this with Lafontaine as well, who really she's grown to trust more than she ever thought she would. It hurt more than she hoped it to knowing she'd have to leave them too.

"Go for it." Will replied. Carmilla's heart started to pound, and she folded her hands over her abdomen and twiddled with her thumbs. She can do this. Carmilla felt the friendship necklace in her pocket, poking at her thigh. It gave her the bravery she needed.

"I think I like girls." Carmilla said, and she held in a breath. There was a brief moment of silence, and Carmilla could hear her pulse pounding in her ears. This was something she knew now, deep to her core now that she admitted it out loud. And hearing Will's reply allowed her to pronounce this announcement victorious.

"Same." Carmilla sighed in relief. She knew her brother would be accepting, but she sure as hell didn't expect such a casual response. She smiled to herself.

She's going to miss him.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura had been noticing how different Carmilla was acting all week. They were finally out of school and done with the 6th grade. This was supposed to be their summer. They were going to get boyfriends (though Laura wasn't too keen on that idea, and she was sure Carmilla wasn't either), go shopping, make friends, and transition their lives into the teenage years.

So why hasn't Carmilla replied to her messages in three days?

The two always texted non stop. It was their thing. Ever since that... _Incident_ , a few months prior the girls had become inseparable; even more than before if anyone thought possible. There weren't anymore... _Incidents_ , but they sure as hell got even more attached to each other. With this new closeness, the fact that Carmilla hasn't spoken to her since the last day of school bothered Laura. She knew something was wrong with Carmilla, and Carmilla couldn't hide forever. Or at least, so Laura thought.

It wasn't until her phone buzzed that her thoughts were disrupted. She quickly paced to the phone perched on her dresser and opened her texts. 

 _ **Carm:** Hey. I need to tell you something_. 

Laura's stomach dropped. This type of message was never a good sign. 

One: Carmilla said "Hey". Carmilla never started a text saying hey. It was always some snarky comment, or a weird sentence announcing what she was doing, but never hey.  
Two: Carmilla was always blunt and to the point. Sure sometimes she'd purposely leave Laura hanging on the edge of her seat, but never like this. It was always fun and sarcastic, not serious.   
Three: Need. Carmilla never said she needed anything; not even when she did. Whether large or small, Carmilla never showed that vulnerability of need to anyone. Unless it was serious and she was around Laura. Laura sent Carmilla a quick text to meet at their usual spot, and quickly rushed out the door.

Laura can only hope things are okay.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla was already at their spot. She had been there for a good 20 minutes. It took all that time to send Laura a text, and Laura was already on her way. Carmilla took a deep breath as she gazed at the carvings etched onto the wooden walls of the abandoned tree house. She reminisced in the countless times she's came close to telling Laura what was wrong, but withdrew. Laura knows little of her home life; only that her dad is in the military and her mother is evil.

And Carmilla wants to keep it that way.

Carmilla let her head rest back against the wooden support and stared at the ceiling. The girls were too tall to stand at full height now, so their only option was to sit. Carmilla had no problem with sitting; she sits all the time. It's her favorite thing to do. But when she's a bundle of nerves and all she wants to do is run around (or away) it's kind of hard. Carmilla settled with bobbing her leg up and down instead, wondering all the ways she could tell Laura the bad news. She still had three more days. Three more days until she was off to... Great. She doesn't even know where she's going.

_Great._

 

**Laura**

 

The tree house came into view and Laura took a deep breath. She hated bad news. Laura hated recognizing there was bad in the world, hated acknowledging that life isn't always made out for her, that sometimes things had to go south. Laura couldn't help the anxiety bubbling in her stomach, churning. Laura stopped mid way as a sudden thought struck her mind.

What if she wants to talk about... The _thing_?

Laura wasn't ready for that. No no, Laura can't talk about that now. Laura debated turning around and running, pretending she never showed up and say she forgot her dad came home early so she couldn't leave. Some dumb excuse to avoid this talk. They never mentioned what they did that night those long months ago, though there was never a day where it didn't cross Laura's mind. It was hard not to think about when she'd hold Carm's hand, when she would hug her, when there was little space between them and she wondered why she wanted to kiss her so bad again. No no, Laura was not ready for that talk.

_But what if it's not?_

What if it's something completely irrelevant? What if her dad died? What if something horrible happened and Laura just walked away? Laura let out a frustrated sigh.

No matter what, she had to be there for Carmilla. She was her best friend after all; what was the worst that she could say that would affect their friendship? Laura calmed down a bit and continued her walk to the treehouse.

She was being ridiculous.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla heard the creak of the wooden boards and her eyes shot open. _Had I fallen asleep?_ Carmilla wondered to herself. She saw Laura climb in, and her heart started pounding again. Her hands began to sweat, and she awkwardly smiled.

"Hey." Laura greeted shyly. 

"Hey." Carmilla said. Laura sat down across from her and there was a few moments of silence. Carmilla started fidgeting with her fingers, unable to stare into the honey brown eyes she'd gotten so accustomed to. Carmilla took a deep breath. 

"I need to tell you something." Carmilla finally said.

"Okay. Shoot." Laura replied. A million things sprung through Carmilla's head, different ways to say what's on her mind. Different ways to say that she's moving. Do she dare tell her she thinks she likes girls? Maybe she should start off by saying that she's moving. That would lessen the blow. Right? Well her intent when she first came here was to say that she was moving, but her mind wandered into wanting to tell Laura this new discovery. But Laura was part of this discovery, because Laura was the girl she liked. What does she say? She thinks she likes girls? Or that she's moving? 

"I think I like moving." Carmilla blurted out. _I think I like moving? REALLY?_ Carmilla lifted her panicked gaze to see confused brown eyes staring back at her. Laura furrowed her eyebrows.

"Uh... Okay?" Laura said. Carmilla shook her head to herself.

"I'm sorry. That came out wrong. I just- there's something I gotta tell you. Well, _somethings_. Something big." Carmilla managed to say past her bundle of nerves. Laura scooted next to Carmilla and placed a hand on the top of her thigh.

"I'm here for you. You know that, right?" Laura said. Carmilla nodded, and took a deep breath. Only Laura could ever get Carmilla to calm down in even a situation like this. How was she ever going to find someone like her again? She wasn't, plain and simple. No one in her life could ever replace Laura Hollis, and that stung Carmilla. The fact that she's keeping so many secrets from Laura hurt Carmilla.

Laura was an open book, and she was always there for Carmilla. Whenever she texted her to come to "their spot", Laura would always come. She wouldn't question why Carmilla was crying, or why she wouldn't talk. Laura would simply hold her and ramble on about nothing, even offering comforting words. And Carmilla couldn't even tell her she liked girls? Couldn't even tell her she was moving? She took another deep breaths.

"I think I like girls." Carmilla finally blurted out. And there it was. One of the many layers to her secrets revealed, hanging over their heads like a cloud. Laura's eyes went wide for a moment. Carmilla and Laura stared into each other's eyes, but to Carmilla's surprise, Laura nodded.

"I think I do too." Carmilla's jaw nearly hit the floor and her eyes grew three times their size. _WHAT!_ A million things ran through her head. She wanted to push it. If Laura liked girls too then maybe she felt the same, maybe if she said I think I like a girl that Laura would say the same, but she couldn't do that. If she continues then she'll never tell Laura she's moving. She has to get that out of the way. This is why she came here... She has to do it.

"There's something else, Laura." Laura bit her lip and nodded. How was Carmilla going to tell her? It was impossible staring into her warm brown eyes. It was impossible to face the fact that she was going to leave her, when all this time something could have happened. It going to be impossible to leave her, when she's been the best thing to happen to Carmilla.

Carmilla refrained from groaning. _Why must everything be so complicated? It doesn't_. Carmilla thought to herself. It doesn't have to be complicated. Carmilla worked up the courage and looked Laura in the eyes. _Here goes nothing._

"I'm moving."

 

**Laura**

 

"I'm moving." Carmilla said solemnly. 

Laura literally felt her world begin to crumble around her. Moving? No, Carmilla can't be moving. Laura's best friend of ever since she was 6 can not be moving. This can't be allowed. Is this some cruel trick? She just said she liked girls. Did the universe decide one day to slowly take away everything good in her life? Something could have happened between them. She likes girls too; Laura's not alone. Well, she likes a girl, one that's sitting in front of her... But now she was moving. Now she's being ripped away from her. Laura closed her eyes.

No.

She knew this would happen. Carmilla was in a military family; it was silly of her to believe Carmilla could stay here forever. It was dumb and naive of her to believe in such a perfect world where she and Carmilla could be friends forever and ignore every problem. But that's what Laura does. She ignores confrontation, and pretends things are fine. It's only so easy when she has Carmilla to make her feel better. But now... Who will keep her grounded now?

"When?" Laura managed to say.

"In three days." Laura choked back a sob. Three days. That's all she had and Carmilla was gone. Laura took a deep, shaky breath.

"Where are you going?" Her head was spiraling and she could feel herself slowly ebbing away. 

"I don't know." Laura rested her head on Carmilla's shoulder, in which the brunette returned the gesture by resting her hand on the one tightly squeezing her knee and her cheek on top of Laura's head. 

"I don't want you to go." Laura whispered. It was getting harder and harder to fight back the tears that threatened to spill. To hold back the urge to break down crying right then and there.

"I don't want to leave you." Carmilla whispered back. And it was those quiet words that sent Laura over the edge. She started bawling, tears falling down her cheeks and sobs breaking through. Carmilla threw her arm around Laura's shoulders and squeezed her tightly. Laura can't stand the thought of a world without Carmilla, but now it's going to be a reality. Now.... 

Now Carmilla is leaving for good.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla sat quietly in her room, her knees hugged tightly to her chest as she stared down at a photo she took of Laura on her phone. Carmilla and Laura talked for hours until it was dusk. They talked about everything, well almost everything. Carmilla cursed herself for not admitting her feelings for Laura, for wussing out. She was so close to. Just a few more words and it would've been over. They were talking on how they liked girls, but it only went so far.

 

_"So... You think you like girls too?" Laura said after they both calmed down a bit. Carmilla nodded._

_"I think I like girls." Carmilla took a deep breath. She had to tell her. Even if it's subtle, Laura has to know. "Well, a girl." She added. Carmilla gulped nervously._

_"I like a girl too." Laura muttered. It was silent for a few moments. Would she dare admit her feelings for Laura? Would she dare cross that line? That line was crossed when they kissed all those nights ago. When they kissed at that sleep over. But... What if she doesn't feel the same? What if Laura was talking about another girl? Carmilla couldn't take it if Laura didn't like her back. She wouldn't spend these last few days with her heartbroken. She can't cross that line... Not now. Not yet._

_"We seem to always have a lot in common, huh cupcake?" Laura smiled a teary smile and nodded._

_"Yeah, we do."_

 

And the conversation was dropped.

Carmilla went a little into her home life, and they even talked bit of her mother's mind games. Carmilla hoped by telling some of the secrets she kept from Laura, it would be easier for Laura to detach from Carmilla. But they only were met by tighter embraces and the occasional "Oh Carm..." that only made it worse. Carmilla decided she needed a better goodbye plan, and there was only one opportunity;

Town Day.

Town Day was when, you guessed it, the town celebrated their making. It was placed in a large field with students trying to work off required community hours by setting up booths, parents getting dragged along with their children to do fun activities, teens smoking pot and drinking, and cops trying their best (but doing a terrible job) to maintain the crowds. The night was filled with a half hour's worth of fireworks and pure magic.

That would be her goodbye. The next day she would be leaving in the early morning, so that had to be it. Friday night on Town Day. She's going to have to text Lafontaine about this. Lafontaine was the only person, besides her brother, she'd confided in about that night with Laura, and her feelings about her.

_Shit._

She's going to have to tell everyone that she's moving. This was the first time she'd ever have to do that. Carmilla's never stayed anywhere long enough, nor cared about anyone enough to tell people. But now... Now she had, dare she say it, friends. And good friends too. Friends who cared about her, who noticed when something was wrong, and when something was they'd do their best to comfort her. Worst of all though, she'd have to say goodbye to Laura. Laura...

_Shit._


	6. Fireworks and Goodbyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla prepares for her big goodbye with Lafontaine while Laura prepares for hers with Perry.  
> 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla wore a blue, loose, short-sleeved button down shirt accompanied by leather pants and combat boots. She checked herself in the mirror for the 15th time in the past 20 seconds, making sure everything looked as perfect as she could get. Carmilla was sitting at her desk, drumming her fingers against the wood, anxiously waiting for a text from Lafontaine saying they were in Carmilla's driveway. 

It was nearing 6PM, the fireworks began at 9:15PM. That leaves 3 hours to talk with Laura, 3 hours for her to work up the courage to say her final goodbye, and 3 hours to kiss Laura Hollis.

Yep, you read that right. Kiss Laura Hollis.

Carmilla and Lafontaine had a huge plan in stock. Everyone was already informed that Carmilla was leaving, so of course she was going to spend time with them, but as much as Carmilla loved her friends, her main focus was Laura. She was to hang out with the crew for at least 2 1/2 hours. Lafontaine informed the rest of them that Carmilla wanted to watch the fireworks alone with Laura in some way to say a final goodbye, but what they didn't know was that during that time Carmilla was going to kiss Laura Hollis.

Again, no need to check your vision. Kiss Laura Hollis.

Carmilla was to wait for the fireworks to begin, and at this point Carmilla hoped they'd be in some sort of a deep talk. By then, some how, Carmilla would kiss her. Of course the thought of Laura not liking or kissing her back crossed through her mind a billion and two times, but she was moving tomorrow. They didn't have to talk to each other again, didn't have to see each other again. And as depressing as the thought was, it was also the comfort Carmilla needed to go through with this plan.

At least she hoped.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Lafontaine sighed loudly as they waited for their dad to get dressed and come downstairs. They were texting Perry about the big night. Lafontaine and Perry have been texting and talking for months about Carmilla and Laura. Perry told Lafontaine one night over a sleepover between the two what Laura told her, and Lafontaine admitted what Carmilla told them. The two made a plan together to get the perfect end Laura and Carmilla wanted, telling each party the same version of a plan. So, Perry told Laura a Laura version of Carmilla's plan;  
1.) Talk to Carmilla.  
2.) Kiss her during the fireworks.

Really, together Perry and Lafontaine were unstoppable. But tonight was a big night for Lafontaine as well. They planned on coming out to their dad about their gender tonight after returning home. Their father was far more accepting than their mother, so they figured it would be easier to start with him.

_**Perry:** It's just a shame that Carmilla's moving. I mean, I can tell Laura likes her back- like a lot. So it's going to be soul crushing when Carmilla moves :(_

Lafontaine sighed. It was going to be an awful tragedy, but why not go out with a bang? Okay, maybe not a bang. Just a peck on the lips. 

_**Lafontaine:** Yeah, but it's what they want I gess :/_

_**Perry:** Aside from that, are you ready to come out to your dad after tonight?_

Lafontaine sighed again. They were ready, in terms of coming out. But there will never be a good time for these types of things. And they hated the way they cringed every time he called her Susan without telling him why. Or how they couldn't answer when he asked why everyone else called them Lafontaine with such patient and understanding eyes. It wasn't fair to hide this major part of themselves to their dad- especially when he's made it clear he's accepting of the LGBT+ community.

_**Lafontaine:** I'm ready, on terms of that accepting myself level. But I'm not like ready to do it, you know? I don't think I ever will tho. I hope that makes sense._

_**Perry:** I get what you mean- well as much as I can get what you mean. Or what you're going through. But just know I'm here for you no matter what, okay? It's going to be great! :) And even if it's not (tho I highly doubt that) I'll be here for you with a mug of tea and a bowl of popcorn. I promise either way you'll have a happy ending!_

Lafontaine couldn't stop the smile spreading on their cheeks. Perry always had a way of making them feel better- even at a time where they had to make two love birds kiss and come out to their dad. Perry always knew the right things to say to Lafontaine.

_**Lafontaine:** You always know how to make me feel better. Thanks, Perr_

Lafontaine relaxed and leaned against the counter, waiting for their father to scurry down the stairs and take off with them in his car.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura checked herself in the mirror for the thousandth time that night. She was wearing a yellow sundress with white bunnies all over them. It cut off above the knees and didn't cling to her skin. She wore flats and had her hair slightly curled, and okay she may have gone a little over board with the make up, but she wanted to make everything perfect. Though, it didn't matter if everything didn't go perfectly.

Well yeah, it did matter.

Perry and Laura had devised a plan to say a final goodbye to Carmilla. Laura was going to arrive around 6PM (which she really needs to call Perry and tell her to hurry her way over here 'cause Laura was getting more and more nervous with every passing minute), and hang out with everyone. Then she was going to spend some alone time with Carmilla to "say goodbye" during the fireworks, but in reality she was going to kiss Carmilla. Laura inhaled sharply.

_Kiss Carmilla._

Laura had recently come to terms- or her version of coming to terms- with her feelings for Carmilla. She called Perry and could no longer deny the odd feelings she was having for Carmilla, and Perry simply listened. Perry somehow turned into this weird plan to kiss Carmilla, which Laura wasn't even sure where she even thought of such an intricate plan, or how she was going to pull off to begin with. Should she just be blunt and do it? How does one even close off after that? _Bye have a great summer! It was nice kissing you. Hope you have a nice time in the forbidden land or wherever you're going._ Laura huffed and looked in the mirror again. 

_I just hope she notices that I dressed up for her._

 

**Carmilla**

 

Lafontaine and Carmilla arrived at the gathering; the sun just barely beginning to set. There was an orange glow over the field, but it wasn't quite sunset, and part of Carmilla hoped that it the sun never fell. Sunset meant a dark sky; a dark sky meant fireworks. Fireworks meant kissing Laura. Kissing Laura meant saying goodbye. Carmilla huffed and shook her head.

 _No. We're not letting the inevitable goodbye ruin this._ Carmilla thought to herself. She's not going to let herself ruin her night with Laura. She's not going to let her insecurities and doubts ruin her final goodbye. Lafontaine nudged Carmilla's side with their elbow.

"I think I see your wide-eyed maiden fair." Lafontaine said with a shit-eating grin that made Carmilla want to shove their face in the ground. But she was stopped from saying a snarky comment when she spotted Laura amongst the crowd of people.

There were her group of friends all sitting around a tree. Laura was standing up and talking to Perry. The two were a few feet away from Danny and Kirsch accompanied by a few other people she never bothered to learn the names of. Even if she did, she couldn't recall them because Laura looked absolutely stunning. She rarely saw Laura in dresses, and boy what a treat it was. Laura had her hair slightly curled, and to Carmilla it was absolutely gorgeous.

"I thought you said we'd get here before her?" Carmilla hissed, grabbing Lafontaine's arm. But not in an angry way, but in some sort of "help me" way. They shrugged.

"My dad was a bit slower." Carmilla shot them a look and they rolled their eyes. "Look, you want a prep talk or something?" Lafontaine said, shrugging their arm out of Carmilla's grip. Carmilla shoved her hands in her pockets, and to her and Lafontaine's surprise she actually thought about it. But Carmilla took a deep breath and shook her head.

"No, no I think I'm okay." Carmilla said. But all arrogance was shattered when Laura spotted her, waving her arm rapidly from across the yard. And just like that, Carmilla's breath was gone. "No. No not okay. I'm not okay please help me." Carmilla said, grabbing Lafontaine's arm once more and stopping mid-tracks. Lafontaine laughed and used their captured arm to drag Carmilla along.

"Come on. You have 3 hours, Carmilla. You can talk to her." Lafontaine said, giving a comforting nudge. Carmilla sighed. They were right. She's talked to Laura tons of times. This would be no different. No different in the way she actually wore make up, or how cute she looked in that dress, or how she was going to kiss her. Carmilla can talk to her. She's done it plenty of times. 3 hours. That's plenty of time to calm down. Carmilla looked to Lafontaine who was still dragging her along.

_They're doing something far more brave than I am tonight; the least I can do is kiss a pretty girl._

 

**Danny**

 

Danny knew something was going to happen between Carmilla and Laura. And for some reason, she felt a stab of... Jealousy maybe? Danny wasn't sure, but she felt an unknown need to intervene whatever was going to happen. Danny knew in her better judgement not to however. It was probably going to be some heartfelt goodbye or something like that... But Danny knew that couldn't be just it. There had to be something more.

She knew Laura well enough to know she was never this nervous to talk to Carmilla, and Carmilla never bowed her head and kicked at the ground when talking to Laura. Danny knew Laura never curled her hair or wore make up, and Carmilla sure as heck didn't dress up; never once. Carmilla and Laura never adverted their eyes from each other, and Carmilla certainly was never one to show that much vulnerability.

Despite their differences, Danny had to admit she was going to miss Carmilla. As much as they secretly hated each other, there was also some weird bond between them. Sometimes they were the only ones who put logic over emotions, and Danny would give her credit for that. But still, she hated the way she was looking at Laura tonight.

It wasn't until a large hand waved in front of her face that she realized she had been glaring. Danny shook her head and turned her attention to the owner of the hand; Kirsch. He was seated next to her, both of them leaning against the tree. He now had a small thing of fries in his hand.

"What's rocking your boat?" Kirsch asked as he popped a couple of french fries in his mouth. Danny shrugged.

"Nothing." Danny snapped back. Kirsch nodded, and held out his fries.

"Want to eat your feelings away?" Kirsch said past a mouthful of food. Danny did her best to fight her smile. Did she just find Kirsch... Cute? No. That did not happen. Wilson Kirsch is not cute.

"Not tonight." Danny said. She glanced toward the exchange between Laura and Carmilla, feeling the familiar tug at her chest.

"Don't knock it till you fry it." Kirsch said, recapturing her attention. Danny turned her head to see his goofy, lopsided grin. Danny couldn't stop the soft smile that danced across her lips. She rolled her eyes and took a handful of fries. Maybe, just for tonight, she could put aside her rivalry against the boy she had always found to be annoying. Maybe tonight, she'll let herself find him cute. Maybe tonight, she won't hide the way her heart skipped a bit when his eyes lit up at her giggle. 

Just for tonight.

 

**Carmilla**

 

A few hours had passed, and it was getting closer to fireworks time. Carmilla felt like she might pee her pants, or throw up. Maybe both. She also felt like she needed to run a mile, but that was probably not a good idea. Being a mile away from Laura right now meant no kiss, but then again that'd seems more appealing right now due to the bundle of nerves she was. Especially those nerves in the pit of her stomach, the ones that are making her hands shake and palms sweat. 

Laura and Carmilla decided on a spot far away from the crowd in the grass. They were close to the chain-linked fence that separated the fireworks from the crowd. They had a clear sight of the show that would happen in the night sky, though Carmilla wasn't worried about that. She was worried about the explosions happening in her chest and the thumping in her ears. God, Carmilla had never been this nervous in her life, and this slow build up to the final goodbye certainly wasn't helping either.

Laura plopped down on the grass and patted the spot next to her. Carmilla quickly shot down next to Laura, and it wasn't until she felt light headed that she realized she was forgetting breathe. _Right. Breathing. That's important. Especially if you're going to kiss someone. Kiss someone. Oh god._ Carmilla thought to herself. 

"Do you think the fireworks will be as good as last year?" Laura asked, her honey brown eyes not helping Carmilla's pounding heart. _They'd be nothing compared to a kiss with you._ Carmilla gulped at the thought.

"I hope so." Carmilla replied, her voice slightly trailing away. Carmilla leaned back on her palms, and her hand brushed against Laura's. Carmilla resisted the urge to immediately yank it away. That probably wouldn't score her any points. God, why is she acting like this? It's just Laura. But that's not it- she's not just Laura anymore. She's something more. She's something so much more to Carmilla than Carmilla could ever imagine. Carmilla stared up into the sky and at the stars, listening as the chatter of workmen whom tended to the fireworks, doing routine checks before they would set them off.

Carmilla peeked out of the corner of her eye to see Laura check her iPod, seeing the time to be 9:14.

**9:14 PM.**

In a minute she would go for a kiss with Laura. In a minute, the sky would explode into a thousand colors. Carmilla secretly wondered if she might explode too. With the overwhelming feelings happening inside her stomach, it just might be a possibility.

"The fireworks are starting soon." Laura murmured, and Carmilla swore she heard her breath shudder. Was she feeling the same rush that Carmilla was feeling? It sparked a hope in Carmilla, and she looked back to the stars.

"Yeah, they are." Carmilla muttered in reply. There were a few moments of silence, and the workmen slowly started to clear off around the fireworks. "You know, Laura, theres something I wanted to talk to you about actually." Carmilla murmured almost to a whisper, and she wondered if she spoke loud enough.

"What's up?" Laura asked. Carmilla took a deep breath, and looked to Laura. She waited for Laura to look back at her, and when she did she wore it made heaven and hell clash. Carmilla gulped for the thousandth time tonight, and she dared inched a little closer to Laura. 

"Laura I... I think I... No I know I..." Laura raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah?" Laura ebbed on, scooting closer. They were touching now, and that really didn't help with Carmilla's nerves. _It's now or never, Karnstein. You have had this planned for days. You can't back out now._ Carmilla thought to herself. There was a glimmer in Laura's eyes that Carmilla couldn't help but become drawn near. She took a deep breath, and swallowed past the tightening that happened in her throat.

"I think I like you more than a friend." Carmilla blurted out. Her muscles clenched and she couldn't move. _Kiss her, you lackwit!_ But Carmilla's body worked against her. Her heart thrashed violently, her stomach doing summersaults. Carmilla stared at Laura, desperate for a reply. Carmilla couldn't kiss Laura; her body protested against her own thoughts. Laura smiled warmly.

"Me too." Laura replied, causing a warmth to spread out through Carmilla's body. The exploding fireworks in the sky couldn't compare to the beauty that sat before her. Carmilla's smiled back shyly. And with that, they looked back to the colorful explosions in the sky. Their pinkies interlaced as they were entranced by the kaleidoscope of colors. Sure, Carmilla was disappointed that she didn't get her final kiss with Laura. Maybe it was even for the best. But for now, this was enough. For now, Laura was all she needed.

For now, this could be her final goodbye.

 

**Danny**

 

The fireworks had started and Danny was laying down on a blanket next to Kirsch. No, she got stuck next to Kirsch. Or at least that's what Danny was going to tell herself. This was against her free will- held hostage. There's no way she'd lay this close next to Kirsch willingly.

"Whoa." Kirsch murmured in awe. Danny turned her head to look at the boy to her left, his eyes glue to the sky with a look like he just discovered a million dollars. Danny fought the smile threatening to play on her lips. 

"Have you never seen fireworks before?" Danny teased. But to her surprise, Kirsch shook his large head.

"Nope. I've seen it in videos and stuff, but never in real life." Kirsch said. He turned his head to look at Danny, and Danny felt her stomach tumble. That was probably just her fighting the urge to punch him in the face. Yeah, that's probably it.

"Seriously?" Danny replied. Kirsch nodded his head, and looked back to the sky. He rested his left hand behind his head, and Danny allowed herself to inch a bit closer. What? It was a bit chilly, and Kirsch was warm. And he gave her french fries. It's not her fault she wanted to be closer to the boy. 

"It has to be magic." Kirsch said, his mouth gaping and eyes wide at the explosions in the sky. Danny felt a smirk twitch on her lips, so she darted her eyes back to the sky.

"It's explosions, numbskull." Danny retaliated, but her words didn't have it's usual bite. Instead, it was light hearted. Too light hearted for Danny's liking, but Kirsch didn't seem to mind. They continued to watch in bewilderment for another minute or two.

"Hey Danny?" He suddenly said, grasping her attention once more.

"Hm?" She heard him take a deep breath.

"Thanks for uh, not ditching me earlier." Kirsch mumbled. Oh right- _that_. Earlier a group of girls offered for Danny to hang out with them without Kirsch. Kirsch insisted she go, but she felt bad for the big blue eyed boy, and decided to stay.

"It's no problem." Danny replied. She went to go grab a french fry, but her hand was met with Kirsch's. Suddenly, their fingers were interlaced. Why did she do that? There were plenty of reasons why. Because... There was... Well her hand... It was... Great. _No excuse for holding hands, Lawrence._ Danny and Kirsch exchanged a knowing glance, but there was a twinkle in Kirsch's eyes that made Danny allow herself to hold hands with him.

"This never happened."

"Totally." Kirsch replied.

And with that, the two returned their gaze to the exploding colors and shapes in the sky. For tonight, Danny was going to ignore that weird feeling in her stomach and the thumping of her heart.

 

**Carmilla**

 

15 minutes later and the show was over. Everyone around the field was starting to get out and shuffle around, talking of rides home and leaving to get back to someone or leave to their homes. But Carmilla and Laura just stared at each other with complete adoration. No words were exchanged between them; it was all spoken with the moment they had 15 minutes previous. Laura was first to break their blissful silence.

"I think we should get back to our friends." Laura said, pushing herself off the ground with her hands on her knees. She held out her hand for Carmilla, and something in the gesture warmed Carmilla's stomach. Carmilla smiled widely and took the hand, interlacing it as they made their way back.

Carmilla was too nervous to say anything; too solemn. And there was nothing Carmilla hated more than showing people, other than Laura of course, that she wasn't always cool and disaffected. But this was hard to hide when Laura Hollis just announced the feelings they shared were mutual, when Laura Hollis was holding Carmilla's hand, when she looked so pretty and she had to say goodbye for the last time. 

Lafontaine had their arms crossed with raised eyebrows. Perry stood closely by their side, giving the two thin smile and eyes full of hope toward Laura. That's when it hit Carmilla.

"The ginger twins totally set us up." Carmilla murmured. Laura snorted. Carmilla hardly called the nicknames she had for her friends out loud, and when she did they always caused Laura to hoot with laughter. She was going to miss that laughter terribly.

"Was that not obvious?" Laura simply replied. Carmilla shrugged. She'd have to thank Lafonbrain and Perrynormal Activity for this later- even if she didn't get to kiss Laura. They got to their friends, and Carmilla saw out of the corner of her eye Laura give Perry a thumbs down, causing the curly haired ginger to nod with a slight frown. Carmilla gave Lafontaine a quick shake of her head, wiping away the grin on Lafontaine's face. 

Carmilla's moment was quickly ruined when she remembered the worst part of all, the part that had to happen now; the inevitable  and final goodbye. Carmilla sighed, but when she saw Laura's big brown eyes stare up at her the pain was quickly forgotten. 

"Uh, can you guys give us a moment?" Laura said, gesturing the ginger twins away. They exchanged a sad glance before the two departed, and Laura looked back up to Carmilla. 

"So, I uh, guess this is it then." Carmilla said. Carmilla caressed Laura's cheek, or her version of it anyway. It was sort of like she was pinching Laura's cheek. This was a move she saw in the countless hours of romantic movies she'd never admit to watching before tonight. This was a romantic thing, right? You hold their cheek? Then why did it feel incredibly awkward? 

"I guess this is it." Laura said, her voice weakening with distraught. Carmilla looked down at the grass, still too nervous to move her hand from Laura's cheek. "But I have no doubt we'll see each other in the future." Laura said hopefully. It was enough to get Carmilla to smile, and she lifted her gaze to meet Laura's. 

"Yeah. I'll see you sometime later." Carmilla replied. Laura gave a sad, lopsided smile. 

"I'm going to miss you. It's been great being your friend- or, more than a friend." Laura said, stopping herself from rambling. Carmilla's gut twisted and she couldn't help but fight back tears. She was going to miss her rambling, her puppy dog brown eyes, her caramel colored hair, her soft hands, her tiny frame and her hopeful ways. 

"I'm going to miss you tons." Carmilla said. She looked up to the stars. "You know I-" Her words were swallowed by Laura's lips when was meant to be a kiss to Carmilla's cheek turned into a kiss to her mouth as Carmilla turned her head at the right moment. She thinks she heard Lafontaine laughing, but she wasn't sure; she was kissing Laura Hollis.

Suddenly fireworks weren't happening in the sky, but in her heart.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

  
They stayed a bit far back with Perry as they watched Carmilla and Laura stand there awkwardly.

"Man, this is like watching a puppy get kicked." Lafontaine said. Even from this far they could see the sadness in both of the girl's eyes, and they refrained a snarky comment on how weird Carmilla was caressing Laura's cheek. It was like she was almost pinching her cheeks, but still it was all too sad to barely poke fun of. Even if it was incredibly awkward.

"I know. This is tragic." Perry agreed. She rested her head on Lafontaine's shoulder.

"You know we're going to be the ones dealing with this heartbreak, right?" Lafontaine said, resting their cheek on the top of Perry's head. Perry sighed. 

"Yeah. But we have got to be there for her after this." Perry said, lifting her head from their shoulder. Suddenly Lafontaine felt cold, and not in a weather type way. A way where they think they miss Perry's touch, but they quickly shake it off.

"Of course." Lafontaine said. "It sucks that they didn't get their kiss though." They added with another long, drawn out sigh. Perry hummed in agreement. As if the world wanted to prove them wrong, Laura went to kiss Carmilla's cheek, and Lafontaine was about to comment on it, but Carmilla turned her head at the (wrong)right time because their lips collided. The look that appeared on Carmilla's face was priceless, and Lafontaine found themselves clenching their sides from laughing too hard, doubled over. Tears collected in their eyes as they watched the girls' expressions drop. Both wide-eyed, somehow paler but managing extremely red faces.

Yeah, Lafontaine was going to miss this girl- the one who's eyes were four times their size in this moment, the one who has been there for them through all this time, the one who helped them figure out their gender and better yet stomp on anyone who dared disrespected it. But right now, they're going to enjoy her shocked expression.

The girls pulled away, completely embarrassed and flustered. They stood their for a moment, staring deeply into each other's eyes. They heard Laura say something along the lines of "Ok awesome bye!" before scurrying off in the distance to her father. Carmilla stood there by herself, touching her fingertips to her lips as if to relive the moment. They saw her mouth the word "Bye" before looking to Lafontaine with a wide smile.

Yeah, Lafontaine was definitely going to miss this girl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you've never made out/kissed someone while fireworks are happening in the sky you're missing out dude. It's incredible.


	7. Coping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Young Laura Hollis is learning how to deal with her summer heartbreak whilst Carmilla is adjusting to her new life without her brother and in a completely new place.

**Lafontaine**

 

They walked into Laura's room to see a truly alarming sight. They knew it was bad when Laura suddenly declared she was giving up on Journalism, when she stopped asking for cookies, when she didn't flip over a Doctor Who episode, when she hadn't texted them or anyone all summer, but they really didn't expect to walk into this. Could they even still call it a room if it looked like a literal hurricane of clothes, soda cans, and empty dishes crashed through?

Laura was sprawled across her bed, sheets tangled every which way, her hair in a sprawled out mess. Empty grape soda cans and bowls sort of filled with milk with a few remnants of cereal scattered about. Not to mention the amount of cookie trays tossed about the room. Dirty laundry was hanging around and shrouding the floor, and the room had an odd odor to it. They were glad of one of two things;

One: That Perry wasn't there to see this mess  
Two: That whatever sticky thing they just stepped in WASN'T a pile of Laura's brain contents (though they wouldn't be surprised)

Jeez, no wonder Papa Hollis warned them before walking up here.

Lafontaine sighed and ventured their way through the mess, careful not to step on any bras nor panties (really who knows how long Laura had those on). Lafontaine stood in front of Laura's bed and pondered different hypotheses on how to wake her up. _Perhaps an alarm clock? No no, that would be to abrupt._ They thought. _What about a gentle shake to the shoulder?_ Lafontaine glanced down at Laura again. _That's too vanilla._

They sighed and sat down at the side of the bed, their back to Laura. She's anything but okay, and that was blatantly obvious. Laura was always organized in her weird way. Sometimes she would slip up, but it would quickly get fixed. Even then those were only caused by a distraction or a disruption. In this case, Carmilla set her off- and she set her off hard. Laura always stuck to schedules, rules, and chore wheels. This was definitely not Laura. It was like she put on a cursed necklace and was someone else completely. _Side note; was_   _another brain crammed into her skull?_ They shook their head.

_Helping friend now, scientific theories later._

Lafontaine held their phone in their hand, wondering if they should call Perry. They were sure a high pitched screech of a banshee along with a long rant on staying clean would wake Laura up, and Lafontaine could use the help. But they don't think Laura would appreciate that much, plus this wasn't really about them and their needs. This was about Laura.

_Wait a second._

Lafontaine quickly typed in "Doctor Who Theme Song" into the youtube search bar, and looked for the most viewed one. _This should work, right?_ You didn't even need to see her Tardis mug, her Tardis lights, her Tardis sheets nor her Tardis t-shirts to know that Laura loved Doctor Who. She made it no secret to anyone. Lafontaine sighed. _Screw it._

Barely 2 seconds after the theme song began did Laura's head sprung from her yellow pillow. Upon seeing Lafontaine on her bed startled Laura, and Lafontaine was seriously wondering if Laura was about to use her Krav Maga lessons to kick their head in, but Laura groaned upon realizing it was just the friendly ginger.

"Did you let yourself in?" Laura grumbled into her pillow.

"No. Papa Hollis let me in." Lafontaine announced. Laura huffed and mumbled something about "I told him no visitors" or something of that sort. Lafontaine wasn't so sure. 

"You have to leave this chamber of..." Lafontaine looked around the room, "Filth and disappointment eventually." Lafontaine said, cringing slightly as they remembered the sticky substance they stepped in earlier. They casually started wiping their foot on the edge of Laura's bed.

"Ithh mphm uh mphmm mph mphmph." Lafontaine furrowed their eyebrows.

"Uh, pardon?" Laura let out a loud, frustrated groan and lifted her head.

"It's not a chamber of filth and disappointment. It's an artistic life style." They gave Laura a pointed look, who rolled her eyes in return. "I'm simply pretending it doesn't exist. It's artistic or something- I don't know." Laura replied, glaring daggers at Lafontaine.

"It's artistic to pretend you're very concerned friends don't exist?" Lafontaine retaliated, cocking their eyebrow. 

"Screw you." Laura growled, letting her head fall back onto the pillow. Okay- harsh. They sighed. Well, at least her face wasn't covered by the pillow. They'll take that as a minor victory.

"Why don't you come over my house and, you know, get out of this god-forsaken room?" Laura gave them a condescending look, and they knew a few more pushes and victory was theirs. "Come on. Just for tonight we can stuff our faces with popcorn and watch bad sci-fi. Look, it doesn't have to be a big event. Just you, me, and a bowl of popcorn. What do you say?" Lafontaine said, managing a sincere smile. Laura thought about it for a moment, then smiled half-heartedly.

"Yeah. That'd be good." Laura replied. 

"Great. For now, I'll help you clean some of this mess up before you grow some mutated fungi in here." (Though that'd be good to experiment on. _Note to self: Go through textbooks for mutated fungi_ ). Laura smiled, and the two started to collect dirty dishes.

"Hey. Why did they invite the mushroom to the party?" Laura said quietly. Lafontaine threw them a strange look. "Because he was a _fungi_." Lafontaine couldn't help but chuckle at Laura's sudden burst of laughter at her own joke, though they'd heard that same joke a million times before. This was good; this meant Laura wasn't completely broken.

That's progress.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla hadn't left her new house ever since she moved there. It was smaller than her previous houses, which Carmilla actually liked. It was just her Mother and Carmilla, which Carmilla wasn't too fond of. But her mother was gone most of the time, so maybe it wasn't so bad. There had been no abuse so far, so maybe this time there wouldn't be any. Maybe with William joining the military along with her dad, maybe she realized she had to love Carmilla after all.

Just maybe.

Carmilla was laying on her bed reading Hamlet. It was her second time reading it, but the brunette was determined to figure out its exact meaning. Carmilla, as everyday since she left, had her laptop perched next to her with the Skype app ready. Laura had made promises to call her everyday, but she hasn't logged on once this whole summer. Carmilla wonders if she pushed to far, if she overstepped Laura's boundaries, but Laura said she felt the same. Laura was the one going to kiss Carmilla's cheek when they did kiss that last time. Carmilla blushed at the thought, and immediately after found herself feeling foolish for really believing Laura would call her everyday.

Laura was probably too busy making friends, or hanging out with the regular crew, who Carmilla also missed dearly. Laura was probably living it up on vacations, having a ton of girls crush on her, and all Carmilla could do was sit here reading Hamlet, desperately hoping Laura would call. Or maybe even a text, or an email. Hell, even a letter. If Laura sent Carmilla a pigeon with a note attached to it Carmilla would take it- just any communication really.

But the thought that Laura was too busy living her life while Carmilla moped, still hung up on the girl stung a little too much. Even if Laura called, or texted, or whatever- what is there to say? _Hey, I miss you. So like, you still totally like me back right? I wasn't just imagining that? Oh I totally was and I need to get a life? Right. Sorry. Hope you enjoy your summer. By the way I still feel your lips on mind and it's the only reason I smile in this god forsaken town._

Carmilla huffed loudly at the thought. Then again, Carmilla couldn't blame Laura. Carmilla never bothered to be the first to send Laura anything either. Mainly because out of her fear of rejection, but she also feared annoying Laura. Carmilla decided to push Laura out of her mind and shove her headphones into her ears and blasted The Distillers. Carmilla was full aware that she was moving into her teenage angst phase, so she might as well ride it out. And what better way than with The Distillers?

It was probably good she cut off contact with Laura anyway. Every text and phone call would only make the distance more and more painful. She didn't need to focus on Laura. She needed to focus on avoiding her mother's hand for as long as possible, as well as somehow making friends when the school year began. Friends. Carmilla sighed, and turned to the next page.

If only it was as easy as when she met Laura.


	8. Going Through Changes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time Hop!  
> Carmilla is beginning her junior year of high school, her second year at her new school.  
> Laura and the crew are beginning their Junior years of high school as well.

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla had to admit one thing about the upcoming junior year, and it was that she got attractive. Her body had slimmed a bit, her jawline has become sculpted by some unholy gods, her eyes had become more narrow in a see-through-your-soul type of way. Carmilla still had a slight fringe, but she planned on growing that out- not to mention but to totally point to she now had a fantastic ass. Carmilla was quite proud of her transformation, but with that came attention. 

She had managed to go through almost all of sophomore year as a ghost; practically invisible. Carmilla didn't talk to anyone, didn't make eye contact with any passing stranger, and really she just avoided getting teased. It was a tough school, and last year Carmilla was a bit fragile due to the passing of her father. She hated moving, but she had slowly eased into this new town. And now that she was hotter than the fires in hell, she was ready to strut her stuff confidently into the school full of imbeciles and allow herself to be noticed. Who knows?

Maybe this year she'd get a girlfriend.

At this point in Carmilla's life, Laura barely crossed her mind. As the days went by over the years, it slowly became easier and easier to push her out of her mind, or avoid the thought of her. But when she did, it was torturous.

It would happen when she'd see a strangers face and for a moment, swearing she saw her big brown eyes in them. Or when she'd exercise and her heart would pound in just the right pace that it matched with hers that final night those years ago. Sometimes she'd see a girl with caramel colored hair and she resisted the urge to hug them because no; they were not Laura. 

Carmilla sighed and applied her eye makeup, using some to cover the bruise on her cheek. But that ship had sailed long ago. Carmilla was truly an unexperienced virgin, but she was planning on looking like a heartbreaker. She certainly could feign the arrogance of one, but as soon as a pretty girl would smile at her it disappeared and she would look at her feet to hide the blush. Carmilla gave her hair one last fluff before heading out the door.

_Well, into the world I go._

 

**Laura**

 

Laura had had one of the best summers she thinks could possibly ever exist. It was filled with many parties, lots of hook ups, and many heartbreaks (mostly on Laura's part though- she was always the one to break hearts). Sophomore year, Laura had become some sort of extremely popular. She was best friends with three powerful people;

Kirsch- Head of the Zeta Omega Mus  
Danny- Head of the Summer Society  
Lafontaine- Head of the Alchemy club

In simpler terms, Laura was invited to every party possible and was friends with just about everyone- The Jocks, the Feminists, the Nerds, the Band kids, the Pot heads, the Goths- you name it. Really no one knew how Laura had managed it. Laura had grown some aura about her that was welcoming, and she made people comfortable as she was also completely non-threatening. This certainly helped with hookups; which became as easy as breathing to Laura.

Freshman year Laura had realized and came to terms with the fact that she was gay. Laura had came out to everyone, and it wasn't until sophomore year- the year she became popular- that girls started coming her way left and right, straight or gay. Laura became, well... Yeah. Laura also got also sophomore year. So that might have added to her popularity, along with being friends with the three powerful heads.

Her core friends still remained though; Perry, Kirsch, Danny, and Lafontaine. That would never change. They have been through too much together, and no matter how many wedges were tried to be drawn between them, the group's bond never shifted. 

Laura met Kirsch at the front of his car, and she couldn't help but smile at a memory dawning upon her. _Carmilla._

Even the thought of her name felt like a stake being driven through her heart. Laura had thought of Carmilla. It was just as easy to push the thought of her away as it was for the thought to come. It was every now and then. Mainly it would be a moment where someone talked of a first kiss, or someone passed a snarky comment that sounded familiar to Carmilla's attitude, or when Laura had drank too much and rambled on to some equally drunk girl about Carmilla before a girl's tongue was in her mouth and the thought would pass her. 

Kirsch and Laura stride into the school, both feeding off of each other's confidence. The two were a dangerous duo really; and they were great at playing wingman for the other, thought Kirsch was never the one to hook up. He was always looking for something a bit more serious, but it didn't seem to get in his head that drunken girls at a frat boy party were probably not looking for a relationship. 

Laura was greeted by many people, all asking how her summer was, comparing schedules, and promises to hang out. Laura would have to deal with awkward glances from girls she has hooked up with, and the questioning stares from people who didn't know her. Laura somehow landed with the nickname "Pancake" from some people; because she "flipped" straight girls like a pancake. (As much as this angered Laura because sexuality was fluid and hook ups don't have to mean a thing, she kept it down- she was not about to ruin her popular streak over some feminist rant).

"Yo." Lafontaine greeted as they pushed passed the hoard surrounding Laura. "You making it okay with you're fangirls?" They teased. Laura rolled her eyes and opened her locker.

"Where's Perry? She's usually attached to your hip." Laura said, trying to change the subject. It was successful because Lafontaine's expression brightened at the sound of their girlfriend's name. Yes, you heard that right. Girlfriend. Last year was a big year of Perry and Lafontaine because they started dating, but turns out they've had feelings for each other for years, just never knew. Laura smiled to herself, remembering the conversation she had with Perry all those years ago about it being a "best friend" thing. And like that, Carmilla popped into Laura's head. Laura shook it off out of reflex.

"Oh yeah. Some janitor was apparently wiping the windows wrong so she decided to give him a lesson on the proper way to do it." Lafontaine replied. Laura snorted. That sounds like something Perry would do. "Where's puppy dog?" They asked. Laura froze for a moment and looked left and right down the halls. 

"Shit. Don't tell me he got lost again." Laura said, banging her head against the locker. Laura groaned and started organizing her locker. He was literally _just_ at her side.

"He tends to do that." Lafontaine replied coolly, leaning against the locker. Laura darted her eyes up and down the halls to finally spot her large friend, but his eyes were trained on something else. Laura rolled her eyes and shut her locker. He was probably eyeing some girl. Laura was about to smack him in the shoulder.

"I swear to god Kirsch if you're staring at some girl's ass again I'll-" But her words caught in her throat as she was finally seeing what he was seeing. Apparently Laura wasn't the only one to undergo some drastic transformation.

There, walking towards the two looking like an angel, was Danny Lawrence. No one had seen her all summer as her family went on some hiking trip in the mountains or something like that, and my god has Danny changed. She got impossibly taller, her legs toned as well as her arms. Danny's hair was longer, dropping past her shoulders and flowing like a ginger river of youth. Danny was glaring at gawking freshman when her eyes met Laura's and she smiled. Danny longed her strides until she met the three. 

Has Laura always felt this way for Danny? Has Danny always been so jaw-drop worthy gorgeous? Did she always make her heart skip a beat and make her stomach flip a little bit? No. No this Danny was new. This Danny was beautiful. Did she sell her soul to the devil or something? Because that would only explain how she got so attractive in so little time. Not that she was unattractive before, but she just looked so-

"Hey!" Danny greeted before Laura could finish her thought. She bent down to pull Laura into a hug, and how the hell has she gotten taller? Laura shook them as she wrapped her arms around Danny's neck. She always hugged Danny. What's so different now?

"What? No hug for me?" Kirsch teased as they pulled away. Danny scoffed.

"Only because I haven't seen you in three months. But don't think anything of it." She said.

"Fine with me." Kirsch replied with his goofy grin. Danny rolled her eyes and settled with half-hugging Kirsch. Even Kirsch, who had always been fantastically tall, had barely a few inches on Danny. "Jesus. Did you get a second pair of legs under those? You got so tall!" Kirsch exclaimed, eyeing Danny up and down for a moment. 

"Apparently hiking through the Appalachian Mountains really awakened a growth spurt." Danny said. _And induced extremely toned legs and arms._ Laura bit her tongue to refrain from complimenting Danny. Laura complimented girls all the time; why was it so hard now? 

"Well well well our friendly jolly ginger giant finally returns." Lafontaine chimed in, walking up to greet Danny with an awkward hug. 

"Didn't burn down any buildings while I was gone did you?" Danny asked teasingly. 

"Not this time." Lafontaine replied. "Who's class you got?" They asked. Danny eyed her paper for a moment.

"Uh... 205." Danny replied.

"Oh sick! We're in the same first period class!" Kirsch exclaimed, holding his hand up for a high five. Danny lifted her eyes from the paper to give Kirsch a fixed gaze. Kirsch rolled his eyes and shoved his hands into his pockets. They all compared their schedules to see what classes they had together and what they hadn't. Somewhere along the way Perry joined and they had to go over it all over again. Sometimes keeping the group together was a pain in the ass, but it was worth it.

 

** Carmilla **

 

Carmilla waltzed into her school, catching the eye of every passing person. It was different from what she was ever used to, but she had to admit she loved this type of lime light. Plus what she was wearing didn't really help with stopping the attention.

Carmilla wore black combat boots, black tight leather pants, a gray t-shirt with a black leather jacket with fake silver diamonds jeweled on the shoulders. A fairly expensive pair of sunglasses rested on her head, pushing away her fringe and other strands of hair that threatened to touch her face.

Carmilla heard the murmurs of other students as she confidently walked into the school, making her way to the locker on the second floor. Carmilla made sure to make head's spin 360 degrees to look at her. Every step was emphasized and each smirk caused someone to blush. She never went noticed; and suddenly she liked being the star of the show compared to her many years of hiding in the shadows. Since her dad died, this was her last move. She didn't have to go anywhere else until she reached college, so she had two years to rekindle somewhat of a normal life before taking off on her own. That was enough for Carmilla to hope to make friends.

Due to her recent tragedy, Carmilla felt as though she had nothing else to lose. Her life would be at school; no longer in books and her mother. She wasn't too worried about her grades however. Carmilla carried a too-cool-for-school attitude, but in reality she worked fairly hard to maintain good grades. Though it came quite easy to Carmilla, she still pushed herself. As long as one day she could be free of her mother, Carmilla was going to work her hardest. 

Carmilla popped out her headphones and started organizing her locker. She stared down at her schedule.

**Room 203: Mr Hardy**

Carmilla smiled to herself. She had heard good things about Mr. Hardy; mostly that he was hilarious and hated his life. Well, they had something in common at least. 

Carmilla walked down to the room and plopped a seat in the far back corner. She set her bag on her desk and pulled out her phone. She started to mindlessly scroll through a couple apps. It hit her that she didn't have friends so there was no one to talk to. Maybe she could try to talk to someone for once- after all there was that boy staring at her from across the room. He'd be happy as hell to talk to her. Carmilla rolled her eyes at herself. Using attention from imbecilic teenage boys to make friends was not ideal, but Carmilla was willing to use whatever she could. Carmilla shoved her phone in her pocket. 

Carmilla grabbed her bag and was about to get up, when a blonde sat down next to her. She had her blonde hair in a side braid, one that she pulled of fantastically well. She had on a black tank top with some band's name on it, leather pants, black combat boots, a tattoo sleeve up her left arm along with some bracelets. A black choker hugged her neck along with a couple other necklaces. She had on some heavy eye liner and purple lipstick, and Carmilla would be lying if she said she wasn't attracted to her.

The blonde locked eyes with Carmilla and smiled. Carmilla blushed furiously and looked down at her desk. _Crap. I just caught totally staring._ Carmilla couldn't tell what was worse; the fact that she just got caught staring, or when she was she didn't smile back. _It's not going to be like that this year._ Carmilla thought to herself.

She lifted her head and looked back to the punk girl. It was probably off putting, but again- Carmilla was desperate. Carmilla stared until the girl picked her head back up and locked eyes with her again.

"Hi. I'm Carmilla." Carmilla announced a bit too quietly. The blonde smiled and extended her hand. 

"I'm Elle. Nice nail polish by the way." Elle greeted coolly. Carmilla took her hand, and wow was it soft. She realized they were both wearing black nail polish and laughed. 

"You too." Carmilla replied, smiling like a complete dork. Elle pointed to Carmilla's head.

"You need sunglasses inside?" Elle teased with a smirk. Carmilla blushed and realized her sunglasses were still rested on top of her head.

"Oh. Yeah, I'm one of _those_ people." Carmilla said, and took off her sunglasses. "No, kidding. I just forgot they were there." She added, folding them and slipping them back into her backpack. 

"Are you new here or something?" Suddenly another girl asked, taking the desk in front of Carmilla, turning her chair to face her. She was another blonde, only not punk like Elle. She wore her hair in a pony tail and had on a tight blue shirt accompanied by grey jeans. She smiled and propped her elbow on Carmilla's desk, resting her chin in her hand.

"Oh, no. I came here last year. If you ever saw a tiny brunette with their head down avoiding all social contact, that was me." Carmilla said, not used to the sudden attention. 

"Ah. You were that dweeb." The not-so-punk blonde said, raising her eyebrows.

"Oh come on now, Elsie. Don't harass her." Elle interrupted, and for some reason it made Carmilla smile. Was this what it's like to have someone protect you? Or care for your well being? Carmilla could only over think the small gesture.

"What? I'm only being friendly. You're the one sinking your fangs into the girl." Elsie replied, making a fake bite. Carmilla chuckled and leaned back in her seat. 

"I'm not sinking my fangs into her." Elle replied. "She was alone." Elsie rolled her eyes.

"Oh. Okay." Elsie said sarcastically. 

"Honest." Elle defended. 

"Right. You just happen to decide this year of all years to be friendly?" Elsie said, throwing Elle a look. Carmilla snickered. Elle still played it cool and shrugged.

"People change. Besides, she looked lonely." 

"And by that you mean, you think she's hot?" Carmilla's eyes widened and her smile turned into a hidden look of panic. Well, not panic. Well, sort of. But in a "a pretty girl thinks I'm hot" type of way. Carmilla looked to Elle and saw she was blushing slightly. Elle rolled her eyes and played it off.

"Great. Now you made me look like some predatory lesbian who preys on younger straight girls." Elle said with a groan.

"Oh. I'm uh... I'm not straight." Carmilla said bashfully. Elle turned to her, and for a moment her eyes grew three times their size. They stared at each other for a brief passing of time. Carmilla was surprised at her own boldness to announce that. Outside of Will, no one knew that she was gay, mainly because she had no one to tell. Elle smiled, and even that made Carmilla blush. But this time she didn't look away, instead she stared into the dark blue eyes that stared back into hers.

"Join the club." Elsie said with a laugh, breaking the tension that was carried between Elle and Carmilla. Carmilla immediately looked away and jumped a bit at the sudden words. "If you haven't caught on, this school isn't so accepting and welcoming of people like us. Speaking of gays, where's JP?" Elsie asked. 

"I don't know. He texted me he was here." Elle replied, pulling out a Samsung and scrolling through messages. 

"I swear to god if he's hooking up with someone-" Elsie began.

"Who, me? I wouldn't dare." Said a male voice. Carmilla looked up to see a scrawny boy standing before her, smiling widely. He sat down next to Elsie and in front of Elle. JP had short black hair, baggy light blue jeans, a white t-shirt, an acid-stained jean jacket, and working boots on. He had soft brown eyes and tan skin. "Who's this? A newby?" JP asked.

"Nah. I moved here last year. I just decided I should make friends this year." Carmilla said. She extended her hand. "I'm Carmilla." JP shook her hand and brought it to his lips. 

"A pleasure." JP said. Elle scoffed.

"Down boy. She's on our team." Elle said with aggression. Carmilla smiled a bit towards Elle in a way of thanks. She winked at Carmilla, causing the raven-haired girl to blush once more. She seriously needs to stop doing that. JP groaned and rested his forehead on the back of the chair.

"Being pan is so hard sometimes." JP grumbled. Carmilla chuckled quietly. 

"A moment of silence of JP." Elsie teased, nudging him with her elbow. He picked up his head and glared at her. She simply smirked back at him and shook her head to herself. 

"Anyway. Welcome to the gay outcasts. Enjoy your stay." Elle said sarcastically, resting her elbow on the back of Carmilla's chair. Carmilla smiled as she watched the three pass back snarky comments and weird stories.

She definitely belonged with these guys.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch couldn't keep his eyes off of Danny in class, but not in the way he normally stares at girls. He stared at her wide smile, her little gestures. The way her hair slightly swayed when she laughed her loud laugh. They were assigned seats, so he sat two rows behind her. Laura ended up next to Danny, and all Kirsch could think was how lucky Laura was. Kirsch, however, didn't have the intentions as someone would normally think. 

Sure Danny had gotten hot, but that had nothing to do with it. Kirsch had been planning on getting closer with Danny ever since the ending of Sophomore year. They had this weird love-hate friendship between them, and Kirsch wasn't planning on changing that. But for some reason he wanted to be closer with Danny. You know, have heart-to-hearts sometimes, or hang out as just the two of them, or maybe even exercise together since they were both keen on being fit. You know, a normal friendship. (Whatever that means.)

Really, Kirsch had always wanted to be closer with Danny on a friendship level. But he didn't decide to put the plan into motion until the end of Sophomore year, expecting to be able to spend a whole summer working on it. It wasn't until Laura informed him that Danny was heading on a hiking trip all summer that his plan shattered. 

Kirsch watched the two girls interact, and he had to admit he was jealous that they got to stick together and he had to be isolated. But he knew he could pick up a couple things on how to make Danny smile by watching Laura interact with Danny while he internally denied how creepy it was. 

Laura and Danny had that closeness that Kirsch wanted with Danny, so maybe he could learn a few tips from Laura. But there was something different in the way the two girls talked this year that rubbed Kirsch the wrong way. Were they... Flirting? Kirsch shook it off. He learned his lesson a while ago that it was wrong to assume so. 

Danny and Laura had come out at relatively the same time. Laura said she was gay, and when Danny said she was bi. Kirsch asked if that meant they were dating. He got an ear full on how it was wrong to assume that two girls who also happened to like girls couldn't be friends, and that it was damaging and a bunch of other reasons why it was wrong.

So Kirsch completely will not do that again.

Even if the two were flirting, it truly wasn't his business. But for some reason it bothered him. He contemplated tossing a paper airplane their way to break it up, but bro that's totally not cool. So instead he stuck with talking to another Zeta. 

Each grade had a head Zeta, and Kirsch was landed with the job. Kirsch was a good leader, well at least he thought so. He had a good heart and his head was in the right place, unlike some other Zetas. He encouraged accepting people, and being nice with the Summer Society's outside of times when they didn't have to compete. The boys idolized Kirsch and he made them feel safe to confide info in him, and even some of the younger grades offered to just have Kirsch as the all around leader. But he had to wait until Senior year before that was even possible;

And you'd be right if you thought Kirsch planned to take over senior year.

 

**Danny**

 

Danny has had a crush on Laura ever since she realized she liked girls in the 8th grade. And when Laura came out as gay, Danny decided she was going to find out if Laura liked her back. She always wanted to ask Laura out, but there was never a right time. And she saw how she reacted when Kirsch asked if they were dating- but yet again even if Laura was interested in Danny at that time she would still yell at Kirsch, saying why it was wrong. However Danny was a determined girl, well she was determined and competitive in everything she did. But especially when it came to Laura and getting her attention. 

So the fact that Laura wasn't currently talking to some girl she planned on hooking up with, or talking to some Zeta, or just talking to the hoard of people that usually were desperate to talk to her, but instead of all that she talked to Danny, it gave Danny the hope she needed that Laura felt the same. She needed a plan on asking Laura out, and she knew exactly who to go to about it. The boy who has literally known her since birth;

Kirsch.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla was glad to see that she wasn't alone in all her classes. Some classes she had with just Elle, some with just JP, and some mixed with random combinations between JP, Elsie, and Elle. She had lunch with only Elsie and JP however, and that made Carmilla disappointed. The two were great, but she was really hoping to get to know Elle better. Carmilla also knew that it was also due to the fact that she thinks she has a crush on Elle- but god she hopes not. Her last crush... Carmilla shook it off.

Carmilla was ready to make friends and slowly start letting people in. Well, at her pace at least. With the loss she suffered, she knew that she can't keep isolating herself. Will told her so over Skype one night, and that long two-hour conversation that summer night made her set off on this ambitious goal to make friends. Well, it's not as hard as she thought it would be. She's just glad that she actually has classes with this new group of friends, and that they were gay (or in JP's case, "half-gay") like her.

Especially Elle. 

 

**Kirsch**

 

The first day of school ended, and he was currently doing his routine jog around the high school track when he got a text that interrupted the country song blaring through his headphones. (There was only one person to know he likes country, and that was himself. It's his dirty little secret). Kirsch slowed to a stop in his jog and paused his music. He opened his text app to see a text from Danny. 

_**Danny:** Hey. I c u at the track. Meet me under the bleachers. _

Kirsch darted his eyes all around. He had made sure he was alone so he could do his embarrassing pre-stretches before his run. Oh god, did Danny see that? Wait, Danny wants to hang out alone with him? Where was she? Another ring at his cellphone.

_**Danny:** I'm under the bleachers numbskull. U won't be able to see me._

Kirsch rolled his eyes and took out his earbuds. Meeting Danny in a tight grey tank top with blue sport shorts, covered head to toe in sweat was not ideal, but he wasn't going to make her wait and stretch out the possibility of her changing her mind. 

Kirsch walked over to the bleachers to spot the fire-red hair between the seats. 

"Why does it have to be under the bleachers?" Kirsch called out, a little excited at the fact that whatever she wanted to talk about had to be hidden.

"Because I don't want people see us hanging out together- just the two of us." Kirsch frowned. _Oh, right._ He lugged his large body through the bleachers and made his way to Danny. She eyed him for a moment, but crossed her arms.

"What's up?" Kirsch asked, placing his hands on his hips. Danny bit her lip, and looked nervously around for a moment.

"If I told you something, do you promise not to tell anyone?" Danny said bashfully. Kirsch furrowed his eyebrows, but also couldn't help feeling a little excited. Secrets meant trust, secrets meant a bond between two people, secrets meant chilling with Danny Lawrence alone, alone meant getting closer with her. Nice.

"Depends on what it is." Kirsch replied. Danny started fidgeting with her fingers, and that put Kirsch off. She was always confident in everything she did; this was definitely not like her. "Did something happen?" Kirsch asked with concern. Danny shook her head.

"No... Well, yes. Well, technically I mean. Just-"

"What's wrong?" Kirsch asked. Danny huffed and ran her hand through her hair.

"I kind of... Have a crush on someone." Danny said, looking anywhere but Kirsch. Kirsch inhaled sharply and held his breath. He stared at Danny for a moment too long, and she looked back at him. Was she talking about him?

"Well, who?" Kirsch asked. Was it bad that he was hoping she'd say him? Was it bad that he got butterflies in his stomach at the thought? Of course it's bad... But why does it make him smile at the thought? Danny stayed silent for a couple of moments. 

"Laura." Danny finally replied, and Kirsch shattered a little bit. Right. That makes sense. Why did he ever think it was him?

"Oh." He said, trying to hide how disappointed he was. No, he wasn't disappointed. He wouldn't date someone like her anyway. Or at least, that's what Kirsch was going to tell himself. 

"But you can't tell anyone okay?" Danny said with a bit of panic.

"Yeah, of course Danny." Kirsch said, putting on a fake smile. She sighed out of relief. 

"Good, good. Look, the only reason I'm telling you is because I kind of need your help." Kirsch cocked an eyebrow, waiting for her to continue. "I want to ask her out, but I need a plan. And you've known her your whole life, so I figured you'd be the best person to go to." Kirsch crossed his arms and smirked slightly. Of course he'd help, but he wonders if he can make a bargain. 

"And what if I don't want to?" Kirsch asked, hoping that he could get something in return. He wasn't about to do a favor for Danny Lawrence without at least trying to earn something.

"Then I'll show the Zetas the video I took of your pre-run stretches." Danny threatened. Kirsch's ego suddenly dropped as well as his expression. 

"You wouldn't dare." He said, taking a hostile step forward.

"You really want to take that chance?" Danny said, sizing him up a bit. They glared at each other before Kirsch huffed.

"Fine. I'll help you. But- delete that video please." Kirsch pleaded. Danny laughed.

"No way popped-collar." Danny said.

"I did that _one_ time!"

"It happened twice!" They bickered for a bit before they started talking about a plan. Behind all that Kirsch was secretly glad; this meant an opportunity to get closer with Danny. They'd have to hang out a lot in order to devise the perfect plan, and lots of some-what emotional talks due to her confiding in him her crush.

This was going to be good.

 

**Laura**

 

It had been a few weeks since school began. Halloween was this Friday and Laura was more than excited. There haven't been a ton of parties as of lately, but this weekend some Summer Society girl named Mel was going to throw one, and Laura was just itching to hook up with someone and drink her heart out. But that's when the weird feeling would come.

Laura would think of Danny, and would suddenly no longer have the urge to. She wanted to be with Danny, she thinks. Or something like that. Laura never really had crushes on people. Laura didn't do the whole "crush" thing. She dated a couple girls, but never anything serious. Danny has been the only one she's ever wanted more with, and with every passing day it only grew stronger. So that was not helping with anything at all. Not with English class were Danny sat close to Laura, not during lunch where she would have conversations with her and realize how close they were growing, not with the want to hook up with someone, not with her always distracting her. God, this was going to be tough.

Worst. Crush. Ever.

 

**Danny**

 

Danny laid horizontally on Kirsch's bed, her head resting on his lower stomach and staring at the ceiling. Kirsch was tossing a basketball in the air and catching it, him also laying on his back and staring at the ceiling. Over the past two months Danny and Kirsch had been planning of different ways to ask Laura out.

Three of them failed, mainly on account for natural disasters, unexpected interruptions, and Danny's nerves preventing her from doing so. They were terrible plans anyway. It was too grandiose. But that's what Laura deserved- some special gesture. Danny groaned.

"We've been at this stupid thing for two months and nothing has worked." Danny said, throwing her hands up in a frustrated manner. Kirsch sighed. 

"It's not our faults bro. Things get in the way." Danny found that as time went on, she was getting more and more accustomed to Kirsch's pet names. That scared Danny a little, it also scared Danny at how easy it was for her to get in these types of positions with Kirsch; her spilling her heart out and resting her head on his stomach, sometimes his shoulder with his arm wrapped around her. But she knew it was because they've hung out almost every single day over these couple of months, so it was doomed to happen eventually. Danny hoped that as soon as she got with Laura they could still hang like this, because she liked it. She wouldn't want to give it up.

"Got any other ideas?" Danny asked, folding her hands on her stomach. 

"Hm. I mean, one. Maybe." Kirsch said. It sparked a hope inside of Danny.

"What have you got in mind?" Danny replied. She lifted her head up and propped herself on her elbow, turning to look at Kirsch. He stopped tossing his basketball in the air for a moment.

"What about the Halloween Party this weekend?" Kirsch asked, sitting himself up to look at Danny. She cocked her head.

"What about it?" Danny inquired. 

"Well, you could ask her out then. I mean we keep going with these like epic ways to go about it, so what if we just kept it simple? It's a party after all, so even if she says no, you could blame it on the drinks. And if, and probably when, she says hell yeah, then you have a whole, gnarly party to celebrate this with." Kirsch explained. Danny narrowed her eyes and nodded. She rested her head back down on his stomach.

"Keep talking." Danny said, eager to create a plan. Kirsch started tossing the basketball back into the air and rambled on about a new plan.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

It's been a while since Lafontaine had come out to their parents. Their dad accepted it no problem, but it took their mother a year or two to come to terms. One thing that killed them inside though was that they couldn't tell them about Perry. Perry wasn't sure on her sexuality. She just knew that she loved Lafontaine, but if Perry ever told her parents then she'd be kicked out and exiled from her family. But still, that meant they could do things like this with out the worry of their parents checking on them every 10 seconds.

Lafontaine was on their bed with Perry. Perry's head was resting on their lap while they quizzed Perry on chemical bonds for Chemistry. Lafontaine used one hand to read the book and the other to massage through Perry's curly red hair. Yeah, it's nice to not have these things interrupted.

There was something off about Perry today, and she was going to try and make her feel better about it. There was an unspoken rule about Perry where you were never to ask her what was wrong, and Lafontaine seemed to be the only one to know that. Perry had a tendency to pretend everything was normal, and if you tried to shove it in her face that they weren't, well, she sort of... Flipped, so to speak. So Lafontaine was going to do their best to make their girlfriend smile until she was ready to tell them what happened.

"What do you think two metals belong to?" Lafontaine asked. 

"Covalent bond." Lafontaine adjusted the book to kiss her head. 

"Good job." They praised. "You know what we have?" Perry looked up to Lafontaine.

"What?" They grinned.

"An unbreakable bond." Perry rolled their eyes but smiled, and this time it reached her eyes. Okay, first step to being victorious. That's good- that means Perry's starting to cool down a bit. 

"Continue your stupid questions." Perry said a bit happier than the last time she spoke. Lafontaine looked through the book for a brief moment.

"Where are electronics transferred in ionic bonds?" Lafontaine asked, already prepping for their next pun. 

"Uh... They, uh..."

"Are you nervous because I have my _ion_ you?" Lafontaine teased. Perry laughed whole-heartedly, and it warmed them. Good, they were making their girlfriend laugh. This was good- that's another step forward. Even if they weren't victorious making Perry laugh was a victory in itself. "They are transferred from metals to non-metals. Remember that Perr." Perry sighed and curled up into Lafontaine.

"I don't want to do chemical bonds." Perry grumbled. She did that cute thing with her eyebrows and Lafontaine smiled a bit.

"Then let's not do them." They replied, setting the book down on the bed. They scooted themselves down so they were eye level to her, laying down on their sides facing each other. "You ready to tell me what's wrong now?" They asked, smoothing out her curly red hair. Perry sighed.

"There's something I need to tell you." She murmured. Lafontaine could see the panic sparking in her eyes, so they started rubbing soothing patterns into her back.

"When you're ready." Lafontaine said, and this seemed to calm Perry down a bit. Only a bit though. 

"I'm scared." Perry said, looking back into Lafontaine's eyes. 

"How come?" They asked with concern. They felt a small panic bubble in themselves as well.

"Because I'm scared you'll break up with me, or dump me or... Whatever." Seeing Perry so worried and dismal was truly a heartbreaking sight. Lafontaine cupped Perry's neck, knowing it would produce endorphins, which is basically the happy chemical in our bodies. They gently stroked Perry's cheek with their thumb.

"Perr, you could tell me you're a vampire and I'd still love you. The only way we're breaking up is if you break up with me, and unless that's what you're doing, its illogical to believe that I'd ever leave you." Lafontaine replied. Perry brightened up a bit at that. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. 

"Okay." She said, reopening her eyes. "I'm... I... I'm asexual." Lafontaine took a sigh of relief.

"That's it?" Lafontaine said, slightly surprised. They were expecting something big; like that she has a disease, or something far worse. But even then it's not a big deal to them; just as long as Perry was safe and healthy. Perry nodded slowly. "Oh Perr, I don't care about that." Perry smiled widely and tears started forming in her eyes. They went in to kiss her, but stopped themselves. "Are you still okay if we kiss?" Perry's smile somehow got impossibly wider.

"Yes you dork." Perry cupped the back of Lafontaine's neck and kissed them. Lafontaine smiled and wrapped their arm around Perry's waist. Yeah, they loved this girl. They loved her a lot.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla stood by her locker and started transferring books for what she didn't need and what she did need. It was then that some jock in her Algebra 2 class leaned against the locker next to her. Carmilla rolled her eyes and was preparing the fend off the lackwit.

"Hey." He said coolly. "What are you doing?" Carmilla huffed.

"I'm on my way to fuck your mom." Carmilla growled. She slammed her locker shut and turned to face the large teen. "What does it look like I'm doing?" He shrugged it off.

"Anyway Carm... sexy. There's a party this Friday if you're down to go." He handed her a slip of paper with an address on it. "You're invited. Hope to see you there." He said with a wink, then took off. Carmilla stood there for a moment. A party? She's never been to a party, nor has ever been invited to one. Sure, there were the few events her mother brought her to for her business, but those didn't count. Those she had to pretend to be the perfect daughter and avoid doing anything wrong so her mother wouldn't beat her senseless later on. She stared down at the slit of paper.

She shrugged and stuffed it in her back pocket. Carmilla's open minded enough to possibly go to some teenage Halloween party. Plus, she's doing new things this year. Might as well give it a shot.

Carmilla headed down to her next class with JP. She's gotten surprisingly close with the boy- well closer to him than anyone she's ever been with for that matter. JP is the only one to know that her mom abuses her, and it's only because he saw the signs.

JP grew up in an abusive home, but was able to escape when his aunt and uncle took him in. Carmilla explained that she didn't have any other family to take her in, and she didn't want to go through the foster care system. He agreed not to tell anyone, but made her promise to tell him every time it happened, and accept his help when he offered. Because of this the two got close, Carmilla dared to even say she has a best friend- an phenomenon she has yet to explain, because she hasn't had one since middle school.

Carmilla walked into class and took a seat next to JP. He had a part of his bangs dyed blonde now, and Carmilla had to admit it looked really good.

"Hey." He greeted, staring down at a slit of paper. Carmilla recognized the address. 

"You got an invitation too?" She asked. He nodded and shoved it into his jean-vest pocket. 

"Are you going?" Carmilla shrugged and started pulling out the stuff she needed for class.

"I was thinking of going. I mean I've been to plenty of parties; I just hope that this one is cool enough." Big, big lie she just told. Party virgin, complete straight edge talking. Carmilla was, however, looking for the opportunity to go to a party and possibly drink, and this had to be it.

"You mean; as long as there's a girl to hook up with?" JP teased with a grin. Carmilla huffed and rolled her eyes.

"I've hooked up with plenty of girls, JP. I don't need to get a girl drunk to do that." Also a big, big lie. Carmilla was a virgin, and only ever kissed 4 times in her life. She made out twice, and the other two... She shook her head. That was middle school- that shouldn't even count. 

"Ah. Right. I forgot you were the complete lady killer." JP said sarcastically. Carmilla threw him a look. "Oh come on Carmilla, you and I both know you're qualified to be a virgin sacrifice." Carmilla eyes widened and she hushed him. He threw his head back and laughed.

"Shh!" She hissed. "No one needs to know that." Carmilla growled lowly. JP threw his hands up.

"I wont tell anyone." He replied. Carmilla sighed and opened her textbook to the page on the whiteboard. "You should go though. I heard Elle might go." Carmilla perked up a bit, but pretended like she didn't. Carmilla was falling head over heels for Elle, though Elle only saw her as the little Junior. Elle always made her feel like she had to prove herself in someway, and Carmilla was always eager to do so. 

"Is she?" Carmilla asked. Elle and Carmilla were no strangers; in fact they were good friends. Close friends, that made out that one time in JP's basement. That one time being less that 24 hours ago. Yesterday. Close friends that made out in JP's basement on a dare on a Sunday while his family was at church. 

"Yup. So maybe you can have a repeat of Sunday." JP teased, nudging Carmilla with his elbow. Carmilla rolled her eyes, swearing up and down if he continued this her eyes would get stuck like that permanently. 

"I doubt it. I mean, she probably doesn't like me anyway. Plus you and Elsie were smoking up a storm, I wouldn't be surprised if some of that went to her head." Carmilla said, taking a stab at how much pot Elsie and JP were smoking. He snickered, and gently pat Carmilla's shoulder.

"Tell yourself what you want. All I know is that you don't make out with someone you don't like for 30 minutes." JP teased. Carmilla blushed a little and flirted with the thought that Elle could feel the same. She paused for a moment, going through the idea in her head.

"You really think she could like me back?" Carmilla asked, trying her best to hide her smile. 

"Are you finally admitting out loud that you have a crush on her?" JP retaliated, resting his heads on top of his head. Carmilla nodded slowly, and he chuckled and leaned back in his chair. "Then yeah. I think she definitely does." Carmilla smiled widely and started to focus on the lesson that began.

She's going to have to act on that soon.

 

**Danny**

 

Tonight was the night, and she has never been more nervous. Danny had decided on her tight dark grey shirt with green skinny jeans for the party. It wasn't a costume party (thank god for that; she couldn't ask Laura out if she was dressed as a bumble bee or whatever) so she could wear casual clothing. 

Danny fluffed her hair for the 10th time in the past hour. She, Kirsch, and Laura were going to sneak out and head to the party. Kirsch and Laura were going to walk to Danny's house and the three were going to walk to Mel's house. None of them had their license yet, so they had to settle with this. Kirsch was going to say whatever, like "you probably should go easy on the drinks" or something so Laura is tame by the time Danny asks her out. Once they got to Danny's home, Kirsch was going to text her. 

Danny had never snuck out before. She was never one to break the rules, actually. Well, a couple here and there. But overall Danny was pretty good at following the rules. Her dad was a cop, so the fear of getting caught really added to the mix.

Her legs were bobbing up and down as she stared at her iPhone anxiously. What was taking the two so long? They get lost? No, they've both walked here plenty of times. That's a ridiculous presumption. Danny was being ridiculous. Danny was going to go to a party, ask Laura out, and return at 1 AM. Simple 3-step plan. Well, from an outside view. When you looked into it, the plan was rather complicated.

Danny was going to flirt a bit with Laura as they walked, and even throw her arm around her to keep her warm. Kirsch was going to take the fall of being the third wheel, and stay in front of the two to lead the way and give Danny her chances to flirt. Once they got to the party, Danny was going to try and keep Laura with her and as sober as possible. Kirsch was going to have a few Zetas challenge some Society girls to beer pong, and clear out the room a bit so there weren't many distractions. 

After that, Danny was going to start a slow speech of how great Laura was, how long they've been friends, and yada yada yada sentimental crap. Then, Danny was going to ask Laura out. Ask Laura out.

Danny didn't have enough time to panic because her phone buzzed.

_**Sexy Guy:** We here ;)_

(Don't comment on the name. He stole her phone and changed her name and Danny was too lazy to change it back),

_Show time._

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla sat awkwardly amongst the group of people on a couch, sitting next to a couple making out. It wouldn't been as repulsive if she hadn't seen so much tongue. She had a drink in her hand, one full of alcohol. She stirred it nervously, watching the way the ice clunked around. It had a strange smell to it. Was alcohol supposed to smell like that? She had never drank alcohol before. Maybe a few sips of wine at a couple of her mother's parties, but that's it. What even was this drink anyway? She doesn't even know what she grabbed.

Finally, the couple to her left got up and decided to take it elsewhere. _Finally._ Carmilla thought to herself. She relaxed a little, but started contemplating leaving the party. If there was one thing Carmilla had mastered, it was being invisible. It was times like this were it really came in handy, where she needed to slip away from a crowd. She sighed and stared at her drink some more. Yeah, it might be better if she left. She didn't know if she really wanted to find out what mystery beverage was in the cup.

"Hey." Said a familiar voice. Carmilla picked her head up to see Elle. Her heart skipped a beat and she smiled widely.

"Hey." Carmilla cocked an eyebrow. "I thought you didn't do parties?" Carmilla asked, confused that she was even there. She wasn't expecting her to come. Elle shrugged.

"Maybe a certain Junior convinced me otherwise." Carmilla blushed and smiled. Elle pointed her jaw to Carmilla's cup. "You ever going to drink that? Or were you planning on burning a hole through it?" Elle teased. Carmilla chuckled and shrugged, stirring the cup in her hand again.

"Spontaneous combustion is one of my strong suits." Carmilla joked. Elle gave her that half-smirk that made her heart start speeding away.

"No but seriously. You going to?" Carmilla thought about it for a moment. She didn't want to, but at the same time she didn't want to cower away- especially with Elle here. Carmilla took a deep breath and straightened her back.

"I'm going to drink it." Carmilla announced.

"Really?" Elle said, cocking an eyebrow with a smirk. "Because to me, it looks like you've never been to a party before, nor drank." She added. Carmilla narrowed her eyes.

"I have." Carmilla replied defensively. Elle grinned and took a seat next to Carmilla, resting her arms on the back of the couch and crossing one leg over the other. 

"Okay then. Prove it." Elle said, pointing her jaw towards the drink again. Carmilla looked down to her beverage. She just has to do it. How bad can it be, right? Just a liquid.

Carmilla took a deep breath and threw her head back. As soon as she took a gulp, she started coughing and sputtering. _IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BURN?!_ Elle laughed but Carmilla was concerned with the burn that was going down inside of her. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and grimaced. _I_ _s it always supposed to burn like that? God, why would anyone put themselves through this?_ Elle slowed down her laughing and scooted a bit closer.

"Quite the party animal you are." Elle said sarcastically. Carmilla blushed a little.

"Okay, fine; you caught me. I've never drank before." Carmilla retaliated bashfully. "I don't understand why anyone would drink this just for a buzz. That's terrible." Carmilla leaned back into the chair, glaring at the beverage for causing the burn traveling through her. Elle smiled.

"Here, let me show you." Elle said, placing her hand over Carmilla's on the cup. "Tilt your head back a bit." Carmilla tried to ignore how her heart skipped a beat at the sudden contact and tilted her head. "Okay. Don't let it rest in your mouth. Just try to down it as quick as possible. Ready?" Carmilla nodded and allowed Elle to help her down a sip of the drank, getting it down as quick as possible. Carmilla still sputtered, but it wasn't bad this time around now that it didn't rest on her tongue. Elle lowered the cup and wrapped her free arm tightly around Carmilla's shoulders. "See? That wasn't so bad now was it?" Carmilla shook her head and smiled. 

"I never said it was bad. I just didn't know how to do it." Carmilla replied. She suddenly realized amongst her small victory that Elle's arm was wrapped around her shoulders. Elle took Carmilla's cup and took a sip.

"See? This is the great thing about parties." She and Elle looked to the people grinding and dancing around the room. "Drunken girls everywhere, people kissing, hooking up, trying to shout over the music. Drunken frat boys getting hurt, girls willing to hook up with anyone- it's fantastic." They looked back to each other. 

"I've hooked up with plenty of girls. I don't need some drunken bimbo to do so." Carmilla said with a bit of arrogance. Carmilla could keep it to herself that it was a lie.

"Is that so?" Elle said. Carmilla nodded proudly in her fake accomplishment. Elle cocked her head to the side and grinned that cunning smile. "Okay, then prove it." If Carmilla had that drink in her hand she was sure she'd do a spit take. 

"What?" Carmilla managed to say. Elle leaned in close so her lips were barely brushing Carmilla's ear.

"Show me." She whispered. It sent a shiver down Carmilla's spine. She turned her head to look at Elle, who had a pleased smirk on her expression.

"Okay." Carmilla said quietly. Elle set the drink down on a nearby coffee table. She stood up and extended her hand for Carmilla to take. Carmilla sat there for a moment. Was she ready to do this? Maybe, maybe not- but she can't avoid it forever. No, she refused to stop running from all the possible good things in life. Carmilla took Elle's hand and let her lead her to an empty backroom.

_I hope I'm making the right choice._

 

**Danny**

 

Danny's heart was pounding furiously in her chest and her palms were sweating up a storm. It would have been easier to flirt if Laura hadn't looked so beautiful that night. She wore a white sundress with black dots all over them. It definitely didn't help how high it was riled up on her thigh as they both sat on a lone couch. Danny's arm rested on the back of the couch and she was close to Laura, a beer she had yet to take a sip of in her hand. Danny decided it was best for now to leave it on the coffee table. 

"You really do look beautiful tonight, Laura." Danny said, boldly grazing a finger under Laura's chin. Laura smiled widely, a slight blush tinting her cheeks.

"Thank you." Laura said, scooting a bit closer. Danny looked around the room for a moment. She had been doing this about every 5 seconds, waiting for Kirsch to clear some of the drunken teens out of the room. She looked back into those deep brown eyes and smiled. "Your hair looks nice tonight." Laura replied, taking a strand of Danny's hair and slowly stroking it. Danny gulped and felt her heart begin to pound again.

That's flirting, right? She's definitely flirting. Danny wasn't just imagining that. No, she couldn't have been. But yet again, Laura flirts a lot with everyone in general... Danny shook it off. No, she's not letting insecurities ruin this plan.

"Why thank you." Danny replied coolly with a smirk. Suddenly she noticed the room starting to slowly clear. Was she imagining that? Danny looked around the room and spotted Kirsch giving her a big thumbs up and a goofy grin. Danny smiled slightly. Kirsch was putting a lot of effort into this, she had to at least try.

"Looks like their going for a game of strip poker or some other dumb Zeta game." Laura said. Danny turned her attention back to Laura. The room was relatively quiet now, and it felt like it was only the two of them. It was now or never.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch leaned against a wall with a cup of Vodka and Cranberry juice in hand, though he's barely taken a sip of it the whole night. If Laura said yes tonight, then maybe Danny was going to stop hanging out with him, and he would no longer have an excuse to hang out with her. He was really enjoying Danny's company; the times they've stayed for hours at each other's homes, the random meet ups after school on the tracks, the training together, the late nights they spent talking on the phone... He was going to miss it.

I mean, he wasn't jealous. No no, he was happy to set his two friends up together. Super happy. In fact, he's ecstatic. Or at least he thought so. If that were the case then why was he getting all the feels? That totally is not a bro thing to do. _I wonder how it's going in there_. Kirsch thought to himself. _Probably great. Danny looks really pretty tonight._

Kirsch sighed and stared at his cup. _I should probably put this down- no bro likes a sad drunk._ Kirsch was about to walk away when he felt a small body bang into his. Kirsch, being the hero that he is, grabbed the small body by the waist and made sure the drink didn't spill on it, holding his cup out of the way. Whether he cared more about not spilling the beverage or the small body, he'd never tell. At this point, he realized he was swooning a body, and should probably see who it was. (The beverage).

He looked down to see a brunette in his arms, her hands clasping around his neck. He smiled at how totally close they were.

"Hi. I'm Kirsch." He greeted boldly, because wow was this chick a total hottie.

"SJ." Kirsch smiled. Maybe this party wont be so bad overall. 

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla took off Elle's shirt all to eagerly and continued to kiss her, making sure to go at a steady pace. Carmilla's hands trembled like an earthquake as she tried to undo Elle's bra behind her back. She fumbled with the strap, slowly getting frustrated. _It's just a damn bra; how hard is it to get off? Stupid thing..._  Elle broke away from their kiss.

"You want me to do it?" Elle offered with a smirk. Carmilla shook her head.

"No, no I can do it. I just- I can't find the damned clasp." Carmilla grumbled, moving her hands all around her back. Elle grinned and stifled a chuckle.

"It should probably help with to tell you that it's in the front." Elle said. Carmilla looked down to the black laced bra to see a clasp in the front. Carmilla huffed and moved her hands from Elle's back to the clasp. Her hands still trembled rapidly, but she did her best to conceal it. Elle cocked an eyebrow. "You're sure the lady killer." Carmilla sighed. 

"Fine. Whatever, I'm a virgin. You caught me." Elle was the one to sigh this time, but she still gave Carmilla a patient look. 

"You just need to relax." Elle said. She moved Carmilla to lay down on the bed, straddling her. Carmilla moved her hands to Elle's hips, and stared at her wantonly.

Carmilla was still fully clothed and Elle only had her shirt removed. Carmilla wasn't even sure if she was ready, but she sure as hell wanted to. Elle pressed a hand on Carmilla's shoulder and moved her to lay down fully on the bed, but Carmilla kept her head up and her eyes trained on the blonde she was so harshly falling for.

"Relax." Elle said in a soothing voice. Carmilla nodded and took a deep breath, but it did nothing to help her nerves. Elle leaned down and started kissing Carmilla again, only at a slower pace than before. Her hands, not shaking like Carmilla's moved to the hem of her shirt. She tossed it aside and moved her hands to Carmilla's breasts, earning a moan from her. But at the same time, Carmilla felt slightly uncomfortable. Her wanton need conquered the feeling again as Elle took off Carmilla's bra with seemingly no effort.

"It's no big deal Carmilla." Elle whispered, moving to slowly unbutton Carmilla's pants. "Just relax." Carmilla thinks no matter how many times she said that, she's never going to be relaxed. She was about to have sex for the first time- so she should be scared at how fast this was going. But her thoughts were knocked away when Elle's hand slid down her pants.

 

**Danny**

 

Danny walked hand in hand with Laura as Kirsch trudged along with them. Yeah, she got the girl. And apparently Kirsch got a girl's number, because he would not shut up about some... PJ? DJ? Danny didn't know. Her attention was focused on the smaller girl holding her hand; the girl she got to call her girlfriend. 

"You know her Danny?" Kirsch said excitedly. Danny broke her gaze away from Laura's.

"Hm?" Danny replied.

"SJ." SJ! That's the name. "You know her?" Kirsch asked with a cocked eyebrow. Danny shook her head.

"No, sorry Kirsch. Congrats though." He smiled again and started bouncing about, talking about what they talked on and how they met. Danny continued to stare into Laura's eyes, occasionally exchanging whispers when Kirsch had bounced too far away to hear.

They eventually got to Danny's backyard's gate. Kirsch gave Danny a nod and moved to the street so the two could say their goodnights. They stared at each other for a while before Danny couldn't stand the silence.

"I can't believe you said yes." Danny said breathlessly, sighing a bit with it in relief. Laura chuckled and smiled wide, tightening her grip on Danny's hand.

"I can't believe you asked me out." Laura replied, and Danny was taken aback. 

"Are you kidding me? Of course I would. I mean, who wouldn't? You're beautiful." Danny retaliated. Laura smiled and blushed a bit. The fact that she blushed boosted Danny's confidence, and she smiled back at the tiny girl. Laura sighed with content, and she swore the girl was going to squeal- which also would be insanely adorable.

"Well, goodnight I guess." Laura said.

"Yeah, goodnight." Danny replied. They stood there for a moment, staring at each other with adoration. She knew she needed to do something soon before one of them got too nervous and left. Danny leaned down a bit to kiss her, but to her surprise Laura placed a hand on Danny's shoulder and kissed her cheek.

"You're beautiful too." Laura whispered in her ear. Danny's face painted scarlet and she slowly withdrew from the smaller girl. "I'll text you when I get home." Laura said, untangling her hand from Danny's. She smiled and waved to the leaving girl.

"Stay safe!" Danny called out. Laura gave her a thumbs up before returning to Kirsch, who when Laura turned her back, also threw Danny a thumbs up. Danny smiled and shook her head to herself. Danny jumped the gate to her backyard and climbed her way up to her bedroom window.

_How incredibly lucky I am to call Laura mine._

 

**Carmilla**

 

Elle rolled off of Carmilla, collapsing next to the raven-haired girl. They were both panting heavily; chests heaving with messy hair and post-sex highs. Elle laid on her back, and Carmilla turned on her side. She was never going to get used to the beauty of the girl next to her. Carmilla eyed Elle up and down, wanting to remember every inch of her body. Elle moved the back of her forearm to her forehead.

"Not fair. You're first time and you're that good? Not fair." Elle said, her breaths still heavy. Carmilla smiled, and propped her elbow up, resting her cheek on her hand.

"You're not too bad yourself." Carmilla replied. She doesn't think she's ever loved anyone more in her life, or ever felt like this. It all happened so fast in some lust-driven state. Seeing Elle act this way because of her was oddly satisfying, and it only made Carmilla crave to touch her again. She was so in love with this girl in that moment, she's actually a bit scared. Elle peeked out from her arm.

"I think I did more than okay." Elle said with a smirk. Carmilla bit her lip and went to tuck a strand of her raven hair behind her ear, but Elle beat her to it. "You're gorgeous, Carmilla." Carmilla couldn't hide her smile now, and she felt the familiar heat reach her cheeks. Elle continued to tuck Carmilla's hair behind her ear.

"Thank you." Carmilla muttered. She eyed Elle up and down again. Carmilla wanted Elle to be hers- all hers. She wanted to touch her, kiss her, be able to tell her about her feelings without the fear of rejection. Carmilla placed her hand on Elle's toned stomach. She wanted every inch of her to be hers, and she wanted to be Elle's. Completely. Carmilla gently traced along her lower torso, feeling the underlying toned abs and sharp hipbones. 

"What are you doing?" Elle muttered. Carmilla shrugged. She eyed Elle up and down again, trying to take in the sight as best as she could. This is what singers sing about, what poets write about- this is what they were talking about. She wanted to see Elle like this again, only knowing that Elle was hers and she was Elle's; not some random hook up or friends with benefits. 

"I don't want to forget this." Carmilla murmured, too focused on Elle to stop herself from spewing out her feelings. They locked eyes and Carmilla could feel her heart begin to pound.

"We could do this again sometime." Elle said, hiking her hand up Carmilla's arm. Carmilla shook her head.

"I don't want it to be like that." Elle tilted her head in confusion and cocked an eyebrow. She stopped tucking Carmilla's hair and let her hand rest on the side of her head.

"Well, what do you want it to be like?" Carmilla shrugged again, and moved her hand to trace Elle's ribcage. She didn't know how to put what she wanted, or if she was sure what she wanted. Carmilla just knew she wanted Elle.

"I don't know... Something more." She muttered bashfully.

"So, girlfriends?" Expecting the worst, Carmilla nodded. She prepared herself for rejection, and tried to focus on keeping this image of Elle in her mind for as long as possible, for as long as she can keep it. She held onto the feeling, knowing it would end. "Yes." Carmilla's hand stopped and she looked back to Elle, who was smiling softly.

"What?"

"Yes. I'll be your girlfriend." Carmilla smiled widely, and swore she could very well die of excitement. She didn't think anyone could be this happy- or that she could even be this happy. _She just said yes._ Carmilla bit her lip to try and tame her smile. _SHE JUST SAID YES!_

"You will?" Carmilla replied enthusiastically. Elle nodded slowly. "Oh thank god." Elle chuckled, and pulled Carmilla down to kiss her. 

"You're an idiot." Elle muttered on Carmilla's lips with the same smile. They shared a tender kiss together, and Carmilla wondered if anything could ever get more perfect than this moment.

She totally owes JP for pushing her to go tonight.


	9. Perfect Never Lasts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter begins in March, and things get a little angsty.  
> Relationships are put to the test, but which ones will last?

**Lafontaine**

 

Lafontaine and Laura were sitting in their room, watching some terrible sci-fi with a bowl of popcorn. That's become their thing whenever one of the two (sometimes both) were upset. But Lafontaine had noticed it's increased rapidly over these past couple of weeks. Not that they minded the crappy sci-fi, because really the amount of shitty FX was humorous, but they had a problem with how Laura was acting. Lafontaine knew Laura was always one to deal with their problems by talking about them, or at least telling someone she's upset. However, Laura hasn't told anyone what's wrong; not even Kirsch. And she won't even admit she's upset; just dismisses it with a simple "I'm fine I'm just tired" when they know it's not true.

That was never a good sign. 

Laura's tiny head rested on Lafontaine's shoulder. She wasn't asleep, but she was acting like she was; almost like she was brain dead. Normally, she'd be stuffing her mouth full of popcorn and be begging for Lafontaine for cookies or some other sugary goodness. She'd make comments on how fake the gore was, or a funny joke on the plot line. But Laura sat completely silent with her eyes glazed over. Lafontaine wondered if she was even watching, but they knew she was too in her own head. They sighed. They need to do something.

Lafontaine decided it was enough, and they needed to push Laura a little into talking about her problems. They were about to pause the movie, when Laura's phone rang. Laura would normally jump to answer her phone, but instead she just sat there as though it didn't exist. Lafontaine eyed her cautiously. She wasn't to in her own head to not hear that thing. Her phone was so loud it could awake someone out of a coma- or even death. In fact, it was so loud and obnoxious that it could kill someone, but be so loud that it woke them out of their dead state. Lafontaine could go on forever about it.

"You gonna get that?" They asked. Laura did something between a grunt and a huff and yanked her phone out of her pocket. She scoffed upon seeing the caller ID as if she wasn't surprised, and held the phone to her ear.

"Hello?" She answered rather aggressively. _Whoa- tiny gay is angry. TINY GAY IS ANGRY_. "I told you I'm at Lafontaine's... Well if I was in danger I wouldn't be able to talk right now, would I? Oh what's that? You just want to make sure I told you the truth because you're being absolutely psychotic?... That's exactly what this is... You don't see me calling you to see where you are..." Whoever was on the other line sounded like they were shouting now. "Oh don't do that. You know I care about you... Can't you just leave me alone?... There's a difference... There is and you know it... Look, I'm going to go now. Bye." Laura angrily smashed her flip phone shut and shoved it into her pocket. She moved her head back to Lafontaine's shoulder and pretended like that didn't just happen, and that Lafontaine wasn't going to get radiation poisoning from the anger radiating off of her. They cocked an eyebrow, and Laura sighed.

"Nothing. It's just... Danny." Ah. That's why she's been acting so pissy. Lady troubles.

"What happened?" Lafontaine asked. Laura huffed angrily and rubbed her head.

"It's not just one event; it something reoccurring." Laura replied. They raised their eyebrows far to their hairline.

"Well what's reoccurring?" They pressed on. 

"She's just... She won't get off my back, y'know? Like she's constantly checking in on me, constantly trying to save me from an imaginable danger in a weird way protect me or something. Or her version of that. It feels like she's a second dad." Laura said unhappily. Lafontaine knew to leave 3 seconds before saying anything. They found whenever they did that, Laura would just continue to spill out her problems until she was done. "And I get it." Laura finally says. "I get that yeah, okay she just cares. But sometimes it feels like she's my dad, or it just feels obsessive. I know it's not that she doesn't trust me or whatever, but just..." Laura growled. "It's so annoying! I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself." She said, moving her hands tightly. Lafontaine nodded and waited a couple seconds before replying. 

"Danny's always been that way Laura. I'm surprised you're just noticing it." Lafontaine said, trying to lighten the mood. Laura shook her head.

"No, it's not that. I've always noticed it I guess. I just... When we started dating it I sort of liked it. It was cute, y'know? But as time went on it just got more and more aggravating. I'm not some defenseless little flower that needs to be protected. I'm perfectly capable of handling myself; I've done it most of my life." Laura confessed, crossing her arms. Lafontaine sighed. They hated to turn one person against the other, or take one person's side over the other; especially when they're two of their best friends. But they knew that it was inevitable; it was bound to happen eventually. They simply had to use science and logic.

"Well, have you told her that?" They questioned.

"Yes!" 

"Has she listened?"

"Yes! And that's the thing! She won't stop." Lafontaine sighed. Luckily, Danny never ran to them with their problems like everyone else in the group would do. Danny dealt with them on her own, or at the very least told Laura. They still hated the fact that they had to choose sides however, and right now they weren't in the place to decide due to only hearing Laura's side of the story.

"Then maybe you need to break up with her." They suggested. "Or, warn her one last time. And if it continues, then have a serious talk. And even after then it still continues, take a break." They corrected. They don't want to say that they should break up, because it's not their place to decide. Especially when they haven't even heard Danny's side of the story.

"I've talked to her countless times..." Laura made the face she makes when she gets an idea. _Oh no._ "You know what?" Laura jumped off their bed, fueled with newfound determination. "I'm going to go talk to her right now." She started collecting her bag. "You still drive?"

"Course." They replied.

"Great." Laura swung her bag over her shoulder and turned to Lafontaine. "Mind driving me?" Lafontaine sighed. They really didn't want to be dragged into this, but they chose to ask Laura what's wrong. They chose to be involved when they did that.

"Only if I can stay in my car, and you don't mention that I'm there." They replied. Laura nodded.

"Deal." They sighed and clambered out of bed.

"Alright then, L. Let's go." 

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch was doing homework quietly at his desk, trying hard to focus on his Algebra 2 textbook. Why did letters have to combine with numbers? That's totally not cool, math bros. Not cool.

He groaned and leaned back in his swivel chair, stretching his large arms above his head. He deserved a break after... Kirsch checked his watch. 20 minutes of work. Yeah, that's break worthy. 

He stood out of his chair and jumped onto his bed, pulling out his phone. He started playing fruit ninja, and was close to breaking his high score when an incoming text ruined his streak. He groaned and closed the app. He smiled and forgot his frustration when he saw it was a text from his girlfriend, SJ.

_**SJ <3:** Hey. Can you come over?_

He smiled widely.

_**Kirsch:** Of course!_

He jumped out of his bed and put on more presentable clothes before grabbing the keys to his truck. Kirsch grabbed his jacket and piled his large body into the cramped space. Last time he got a text like that, SJ surprised him with a romantic night out on the town. He smiled and put his key into the ignition, ready for another surprise.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla stood in Elle's kitchen, stirring up some omelette. Carmilla was an excellent cook due to a life time of cooking lessons, and she knew how much her girlfriend loved breakfast for lunch, so she figured why not?

She had The Distillers' album Coral Fang blasting through her earphones, dancing to herself as she made the breakfast, lunch, whatever. All Carmilla knew was that there was no way in hell she was calling it brunch. Honestly, it sounds like a frat boy's nickname. _Brunch_. Carmilla shuddered. _Disgusting_.

Carmilla was deep in thought about how much she despised the word "brunch" when she felt someone yank an earbud out of her ear, and felt kisses be planted along her neck. Slender arms wrapped around her waist and hugged her close to a warm body. Carmilla smiled. 

"What are you making?" Elle whispered, continuing to leave a trail of kisses along her neck. 

"It was supposed to be breakfast, or lunch in bed." Carmilla replied, stirring the omelette. Elle pulled her lips away from Carmilla's neck.

"You mean brunch?" Elle teased. Carmilla whipped around so fast she almost got whiplash. She angrily pointed the wooden spoon towards Elle, still stained with eggs.

"Don't you dare call it that." Carmilla threatened. Elle laughed and pulled away, moving her hands to hover next to her head in a sign of truce.

"I'm just saying; that's what sane people call it." Elle said. 

"You mean, idiots?" Carmilla retaliated. Elle rolled her eyes. Carmilla turned around to place the omelette on the plate.

"What are you doing here anyway? Aren't you only up after 1 PM on weekends?" Elle asked. Carmilla sighed and tossed the what once were eggs onto the paper plate. 

"My mother did the... Thing, again." Elle had found out about the abuse a few months ago on a night when they were about to have sex. Carmilla insisted she didn't pull off her shirt, but Elle did it anyway and saw the bruises and cuts. She made Carmilla tell her, and promised that Carmilla could visit her home whenever she needed to. Carmilla smiled at the memory, and how gentle she once was about it. Sometimes Elle could be a little insensitive on the matter, but she informed Carmilla that Carmilla was being too sensitive about it. Carmilla realized Elle was right; hell she was always right.

"Where?" Carmilla pointed to her cheek, where makeup covered up a bruise. Elle squinted her eyes, and saw the underlying bruise. Elle groaned loudly as Carmilla handed her the omelette.

"Can't she just leave you alone?" Elle grumbled, grabbing a fork from the cabinet. Carmilla sighed and hopped up on the counter, swinging her legs back and forth.

"I wish." Elle stuffed a piece into her mouth. 

"I don't see why you don't just fight back." Elle said past a mouthful of food. Carmilla sighed loudly. It was impossible to fight back. Her mother was 6'2, much taller and stronger than small, fragile Carmilla. 

"She's too strong. Besides, it would only make the punishments worse." Carmilla said, feeling the somber coming up that always trail with the memories. She looked down at her swinging legs.

"Can't you just hide? Or run away?" Elle asked, adding to the weight that had fallen on Carmilla's shoulders. Carmilla's tried that. She's tried escaping to her room, rushing out the door- anything. But her mother always caught her in time with either a yank to her hair or a push to her back. Last time she tried running, she ended up falling down the stairs. She doesn't want to relive something like that.

"If only it were that easy." Carmilla murmured.

"It is." Carmilla cringed. That definitely hit a nerve.

"Maybe you don't understand." Carmilla snapped, lifting her head to glare at Elle. Elle sighed and gulped down a bite of the omelette.

"This is what I get for dating someone younger; you throw tantrums like a toddler." Elle said. Carmilla felt the guilt and that need to get her approval again. _She's right; I'm acting like a toddler._

"No. Look, you're right. I'm sorry; I'll try to fight back next time." Carmilla pleaded. Elle smiled, and a relief washed over Carmilla. She did it; she got her approval again. Elle always was so much older and wiser, and Carmilla felt a need to show her she's not just a child like Elle would say she was. Elle walked over to Carmilla and stood between her legs. She cupped her chin and kissed Carmilla.

"Good." Elle said, using her other hand to rub up Carmilla's thigh. Carmilla draped her arms over Elle's shoulders and smiled back at her. As long as Elle was here to comfort her, everything was okay.

Elle was all she needed, as she was all Carmilla had.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch wasn't sure how far he ran; he just knew he needed to go somewhere. Even if that somewhere happened to be the high school track. He just needed to be somewhere; to do something. The words still rang in his head.

_"You're just not... Intelligent enough for me, Kirsch. I'm sorry. You're really sweet, but it's not going to work between us. You can really be an idiot sometimes, and it's really off putting. I mean, sometimes I feel like you don't even understand what I'm saying. You're really sweet, Kirsch. But we're just on different... Levels."_

God damn it; why does he have to be so stupid? He's always so stupid. He's not even smart enough for the best girl he's ever had! Why can't he be good enough for SJ? Was it really something else? Or was that the whole truth? No it had to be the whole truth. Kirsch was an idiot. No amount of kindness she supposedly said he had could fix that. God, can't he do anything right?

Kirsch hopped the fence that blocked off the track and was about to begin his run, when he spotted a familiar red head leaning against the chain-linked fence, sitting on the ground with her knees hugged tightly to her chest. _Danny?_

Kirsch jogged over to her. Danny's head was buried in her hands. She looked hurt, and was clearly distressed. He couldn't help but feel bad. He wanted to do something to make the tall red head feel better. He had to do something even though he was in pain himself.

 

**Danny**

 

Danny just sat there. She didn't know why out of all places she could've gone she went to the track, but here she was, holding back tears as she buried her head in her hands. God, why was she so stupid? Why did she have to be so over protective of Laura? Not like she could help it anyhow. Laura's too good, and needs to be protected... But why can't Laura just understand she just really cares about her? Why did she have to be that way? Laura is fragile; she needs someone to look after her. Someone to protect her. _Fuck..._

"Uh, hey." Said a familiar deep voice. Danny lifted her head to see Kirsch with worried, puppy dog eyes staring down at her. She wasn't in the mood to get in some inevitable competition with him, nor had the patience to deal with him. But at the same time, she didn't want him to go.

"Hey." Danny said, choking back tears. Kirsch paused for a moment.

"You okay?" He asked, taking a step forward. Danny shook her head, angry at what happened, angry at what made her come here in the first place.

"No. No I'm not fucking okay. Does it look like I'm okay?" Danny was a little more harsh than she intended to be, but she wasn't in exactly a patient mood right now. She needed to get some anger out, and Kirsch just happened to be there. Danny could tell she hurt him for a microsecond, but he simply fished out his phone.

"Have you ever played Fruit Ninja?" He suddenly asked. Danny cocked her head and furrowed her eyebrows.

"What?" She said softly.

"Fruit Ninja. Ever heard of it?" Danny shook her head. "May I?" He asked, pointing to the spot next to her. Danny nodded. Kirsch plopped down next to her and showed her his phone. He started swiping his finger across the screen, images moving too fast for Danny to decipher what he was doing. "It's a game where you have to slice the fruit." Danny gave him a look. Was he serious? "Look, I know it sounds stupid but it's actually hella fun- and really addicting. Come on, give it a try." Kirsch said, gesturing for her to take the phone. Danny hesitated for a moment, but took his iPhone and started playing the game. Danny's competitive side automatically kicked in and she was merciless towards the flying fruits. Eventually the round ended, and Danny furrowed her eyebrows.

"It's harder than I expected." Danny murmured.

"But you want to keep playing, right?" Kirsch said. Danny nodded, not yet ready to admit defeat to the game. He pressed a few buttons on the screen and brought up another round. Danny swiped her finger every which way, slicing the fruits that were unfortunate enough to come across the smite of her finger. The round ended again, and Kirsch set another one up. This repeated until mid-way through one of the rounds, he started talking.

"So what brought you here?" Kirsch asked. Danny realized how much better she actually felt compared to before, how much she had actually calmed down. Danny handed Kirsch his phone. She threw her head back against the fence and rested her elbows on top of her knees.

"Laura dumped me." Danny muttered, feeling the pain from before.

"Same." Kirsch muttered. She tilted her head to look at him. "SJ, I mean. SJ just dumped me." The words sent Danny into some type of a mild shock. Kirsch just gotten dumped like Danny, so he must be feeling the same agony she was. Maybe not exactly the same, but that same type of pain. Yet, through it all, he's shown such kindness and patience. Even if it was in his own weird way. Kirsch is so kind, and patient. Even in pain he was strong enough to offer support to someone; to someone that is Danny- who lashed out at him because she couldn't contain her own anger and misery. Maybe it was because she was in an emotional state, or maybe not. But for some reason she was having strong feelings of admiration of Kirsch, and she wondered why someone would ever pass up the chance to be with such a fantastic guy.

"Why on earth would she break up with you?" Danny said, almost in shell shock. Kirsch shrugged and rubbed the back of his head.

"She said I was too dumb." Kirsch replied with pain in his eyes. Danny's jaw dropped.

"What the hell? You have so many great characteristics, I don't understand why she would." 

"Ha ha. Very funny." 

"I'm being serious." Danny said. She turned and faced Kirsch. He gave her his typical puzzled look. "You're an amazing guy, Kirsch." Danny normally would dry heave at the thought of getting this sentimental with Kirsch, but for some reason it was different at this moment. She wanted to make him feel better, make him know how great he actually is. Kirsch sighed.

"She doesn't seem to think so. Apparently I'm not fucking good enough." Kirsch said, choking back a sob. It broke Danny's heart, and she felt a need to protect the puppy before her.

"Then forget about her." He looked towards Danny, something about his eyes brightened up. Good, it's working. "Look, take right now for example. You're really hurt, but you shoved that aside to make me feel better. Even after I lashed out on you. Not a lot of people would do that. I mean yeah, you may not be the smartest guy to ever exist, but you're not dumb. You are intelligent in other ways. And you have the biggest heart I've ever seen. So don't let some girl who measures self worth with what she believes to be intelligence tell you otherwise, okay?" Kirsch brightened up a bit. 

"Thanks Danny." She rubbed his back in a comforting way, and was too worried about protecting him to be weirded out by how comfortable she was to do this with Kirsch.

She'll have to deal with that later.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Somehow they ended up at Perry's place. Perry had an arm around Laura, rubbing up and down her arm while she cried into Perry's shirt. Perry was muttering comforting words that didn't seem to matter to Laura. Perry stared up at Lafontaine, who was standing before the two with their arms crossed. 

Lafontaine could see in Perry's eyes that she was begging for them to help, but they really didn't know what to do. They felt guilty enough that they just caused a break up, or at least that's what they were telling themselves. And now that they have Laura bawling her eyes out (which had to be one of the most heartbreaking sights known to man kind), they really didn't know what to do. It was like watching a bunny slowly being put into a wood chipper.

"Why don't we do something fun!" Perry suggested with fake enthusiasm.

"I don't think-" But they were cut off when Perry kicked them in the shin. They refrained from yelping, picking up on what she was trying to do. "And by that I mean that sounds like a good idea." They said, trying to play along.

"Why don't we play, a, um, a board game!" Perry said, her voice raising an octave. This was truly disastrous to watch.

"A board game?" Lafontaine mouthed to her in disbelief. Perry shrugged and mouthed "help me" back, pointing to Laura. They sighed.

"Why don't we go back to watching shitty sci-fi movies, yeah?" Lafontaine suggested. Laura nodded. _Good, see? She's nodding. That's a nod. She's not completely irresponsive._ "I'll go get your laptop Perr." They said, and scurried over to the laptop on her desk. 

"No! Wait! Don't-" But Lafontaine opened the laptop to see a tab listed "how to hide your addiction". Lafontaine felt their heart sink to the bottom of their stomach, seeing almost every suggestion had been clicked. Their color drained from their face, and they started to feel numb. They lifted their panicked gaze to glare at Perry. _She never... What is she addicted to?_ A million thoughts raced through their head.How come she never said anything about it? They shared everything, they always talked about everything. There were no secrets between them- not ever. Lafontaine felt anxiety wash over them. _Oh god; what is she addicted to? What else is she hiding from me?_

"We're talking about this later." Lafontaine murmured, turning their attention back to Laura. Perry shamefully looked down. They'll deal with this later. Right now, they had to focus on their heartbroken friend.

If they could even focus enough to do that.

 

**Kirsch**

 

It was late at night now, around 3 AM. Danny and Kirsch decided to walk around and just talk forget about what was happening. They had texted each other an hour previous. Danny asked if Kirsch was awake, and he was. So they decided to meet up at the high school and somewhere along the way they walked to the football field. 

They were laying on the cold, damp grass and staring at the dark sky shrouded with stars.

"Wanna play a game?" Kirsch asked. Danny turned to him.

"A game?" He nodded. "What game?" 

"So, well it's not really a game. What you do is look to the constellations and point out patterns of stars that look like things. It's kind of like connect the dots, only with patterns in the stars." Danny cocked an eyebrow.

"That's the dumbest thing I ever heard." Kirsch shook his head.

"Nah bro. It's actually really fun." Danny sighed, and shrugged as if to say 'might as well...' The two looked up to the sky, and his eyes searched for a pattern.

"Show me how it's done, bromeo." Kirsch hummed, trying to find a shape made by the dazzling lights in the sky. He saw a rounded-like shape, and decided it kind of looked like one of his favorite things.

"That one kind of looks like a basketball." Kirsch said, pointing to the curved shape formed by the stars. Danny huffed.

"Of course you would see a basketball." Danny replied. "That's clearly an apple." Kirsch shook his head.

"Nah bro. That's a basketball." Kirsch defended.

"Are we looking at the same sky? Thats clearly an apple." 

"You're just not looking at the right one." Kirsch said. "Here, point to where you're looking." Danny stuck her finger out and pointed south of Kirsch's vision. He shook his head, and grabbed Danny's hand. "You're looking too low. Look riiight," he adjusted her hand so her finger was pointing to the constellation he was seeing, "there." Danny examined the new view for a moment, and realization washed over her face.

"Oh. That is a basketball." Danny muttered. 

"See! I told you so." Kirsch exclaimed excitedly, grinning at his victory. 

"I was just-" She turned and when they met eyes, she stopped. There faces were so close. Suddenly the atmosphere around them changed as Kirsch gazed into her sky blue eyes, holding him captive. "I was just blind to what was in front of me the whole time." Danny said, her words trailing away. He darted his eyes to her lips then back up. Was it bad that he wanted to kiss her? That his stomach was doing tumbles? That his heart was starting to beat a little faster? They brought their hands down between them, and she interlaced their fingers, and yeah his heart was definitely pounding in his chest now. Danny scooted closer, and he replicated her motions. Danny started to lean in and he closed his eyes. Their noses bumped, and he could feel her breath passing his lips. They where about to kiss when Kirsch's phone started blaring, cutting the silence between them. They sat up and scurried a good two feet away from each other. 

"Shit." Kirsch cursed under his breath, fumbling with his phone. His hands were still shaky from the almost-kiss between them.

"Will you turn it off? The damned things going to announce to the whole world we're here!" Danny whispered harshly, and ran a hand through her red hair.

"I'm trying I'm trying." Kirsch grumbled. He managed to put his phone on vibrate, and saw who was calling. He sighed. "It's SJ." Kirsch was about to answer, when Danny took his phone and chucked it away. His mouth dropped. "Hey! What was that for!" He exclaimed, looking in the direction of his lost phone.

"You were going to answer her, and she was probably drunk dialing." Danny said quickly. He shot her a look, and she sighed. "Look, we came out here to forget, right?" He nodded.

"Right." 

"So accepting a drunken call from SJ is probably not going to help." Kirsch nodded again, and laid back down on his back. Danny was soon to follow, and they inched a bit closer. There were a few moments of intense silence. Should he just point out the elephant in the room? They were going to kiss just then, right?

"And, we totally almost-"

"That one looks like a car." Danny cut off. Guess ignoring this was easier than to actually admit she was going to kiss him. She probably regrets it now. Kirsch sighed; tonight was just not his night. But then, he felt his hand get locked with Danny's. He turned his head to see her already looking at him. She smiled warmly at him, and he couldn't help but smile back. They turned their attention back to the sky.

"What type of car do you think it is?"

"A Volvo."

"That's a Toyota."

"You're completely blind if you think that."

"I'm not blind!" The two continued their night holding hands and pointing out constellations, both knowing that yeah, they were going to kiss. But neither of them had a problem with that.

 

**Perry**

 

Some movie was playing, but she could barely focus. Laura had fallen asleep on Perry's shoulder, and now she and Lafontaine were pretending to watch the movie on the screen. It was around 2 or 3 AM- Perry wasn't sure. Regret, guilt, and panic were taking over, and a million thoughts ran through her head.

She was so careful- how could she be so stupid? She got too comfortable. She got too cocky. It was only a matter of time before someone caught on... But did it have to be Lafontaine? No, no this wasn't happening. Everything was fine, and normal. She had a perfect relationship with Lafontaine, a functional family, and no addictions. Things were perfectly fine and normal.

No, no they weren't. Things were so bad. This was so bad. This addiction was bad. This whole entire thing was bad. She was so careful! She locked it away, she hid it from her friends, from Lafontaine, from her family. She made sure no one knew, that she always covered her tracks. She couldn't even close a damn tab on her laptop? This- no. This wasn't happening. This can't be happening. 

"Perry..." Lafontaine said, breaking the hours of silence that had fallen between them. 

"Yes sweetie?" Perry replied. If she just pretended it didn't happen, if Lafontaine didn't see anything, if she just looked the other way and ignored the problem then things can be normal.

"You can't ignore what I saw..." _Please don't talk to me in that voice_. "Perry. What are you addicted to?" They asked, grabbing Perry's hand and stroking it with their thumb. Perry sighed and closed her eyes. 

"I don't know what you're talking about." She said, smiling tightly at Lafontaine. No, big mistake to look in their eyes. Their patient, loving eyes that have always been there for her. The ones that she has been lying to for months, when they've been so open.

"You do, Perry. You do. Please, just this once don't pretend that things are normal when they're not." Perry's heart sunk to the pit of her stomach as though the weight of her lies was anchored to it. "Perry... What's going on?" Perry could feel her defenses being crushed with each passing second. She knew it wasn't long before she broke. She can't lie to Lafontaine- it's impossible.

"There's nothing. Everything is normal." Perry knew her voice was raising a few octaves, completely blowing her cover. 

"Perry." They said sternly. "We've never hid anything from each other; what is going on? You know you can tell me." Lafontaine said, closing the laptop and taking Perry's other hand. If she could just last a few more minutes, Lafontaine would give up. If she could just lie a little longer, pretend that much longer. 

"There's nothing-"

"Perry!" Lafontaine exclaimed. A harsh silence fell between them, and Perry could see the hurt in Lafontaine's eyes. She tried to swallow past a lump forming in her throat. There was no way she could keep this up; not with them. It was impossible with the way they were looking at her. She can't keep lying, hiding, pretending. She had to tell them. Perry took a deep breath and looked to their conjoined hands. Her heart started pounding in her chest. It felt as though she was on the edge of a cliff; just that much further and she can reveal her secret. She knows Lafontaine is at the bottom, waiting to catch her. But she's still scared to fall. She just needs to do it. Just say it and get it over with. Perry gulped again, though it did nothing to help with the tightness in her throat.

"Painkillers." Perry murmured. She immediately felt the panic upon admitting the secret she's kept for so long. She wanted to suck in her words; to take them back. She wanted to take back the hours of the day and do it all over again. But she can't. Oh god what has she done? "Don't tell anyone! You can't tell anyone! Oh, shoot!" Perry blurted out, and started fidgeting with her hands. She wanted to take one now; to take a pill and pretend again. Lafontaine wrapped their arms around Perry and pulled her in close.

"We're going to get past this together. I'm going to get you help. I'm going to help- it's going to be okay Perr. It's going to be okay." Perry broke down into tears, curling up in Lafontaine's arms. Of course they would be fantastic; they always are. She was so lucky to have someone like Lafontaine. Someone she's been lying to, even though they've been so honest. Why is Perry like this? She gripped Lafontaine's arm and rested her head on their chest.

"I'm sorry." She muttered over and over again. They stayed like that for a while, Lafontaine occasionally questioning her. But Perry couldn't answer anything, and instead Lafontaine settled with whispering comforting words until she fell asleep.

Perry doesn't deserve someone like Lafontaine.

 

**APRIL**

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla stood in Elle's bathroom shirtless. Her mother had just beaten her senseless. She had bruises and slashes all over her back, bleeding and throbbing. Carmilla lost track of what her mother used this time, or what Carmilla even did to deserve the beating. She just knew it was bad, and that she was in a lot of pain. Elle was trying to clean out the wounds, applying bandages and using alcohol wipes. Used wipes lay all around, stained with Carmilla's blood. Carmilla stood, gripping the sink counter while Elle stood behind her, tending to her wounds.

"She really gave it her all this time." Elle muttered, eyeing Carmilla's back up and down. She rubbed an alcohol wipe and Carmilla jumped and hissed from the pain.

"Ow! Careful!" Carmilla growled, clenching onto sink counter.

"Sorry, sorry. I'm being as gentle as I can!" Elle replied harshly. Carmilla glared at herself in the mirror, seeing the bruise under her eye and the busted lip. Filthy. Why was she so filthy? Why couldn't she just be good enough for her mother? Why couldn't she just be good enough for anyone? Carmilla draped her head as Elle applied a bandage. But she couldn't escape herself, seeing her reflection glare back at her on the sink. Why was she so filthy? And unlovable? What in god's name could Elle ever see in her? 

"Why do you even love me?" Carmilla muttered, squeezing her eyes shut. Elle huffed.

"Oh no. Oh no no no. Not _this_ again, okay? I told you no more over dramatic bullshit. Just because your mom says some dumb insult doesn't make it true. I love you, alright? Just let me do this." Elle grumbled. Carmilla nodded and inhaled sharply as Elle cleaned up another wound. Carmilla was craving Elle's affection, but right now she was in too much pain to do anything about it. She just wanted Elle to hold her gently and tell her she was going to be okay, that she didn't have to worry whether she loved her or not. To make her feel safe and secure. But Elle would say something about her sounding young and naive, which was right. Elle was always right. Carmilla needed to stop acting like a child.

"We just have to bandage this last one up and we're done, okay?" Elle said. Carmilla nodded her head and prepared for the next bandage, when Elle wrapped her arms around Carmilla's waist. Carmilla inhaled sharply and yelped.

"Ow! What are you doing?" Carmilla hissed, looking back up in the mirror to see Elle's eyes. Elle smiled and planted a kiss on Carmilla's shoulder. 

"What? It's hard to resist when I see you shirtless like this." Elle said, leaving a trail of kisses along her neck. Carmilla attempted to shimmy out of her grip, which only hurt her more. She hissed in pain.

"Elle cut it out! That hurts!" Carmilla barked, trying to pry her hands off of her. 

"Oh come on. It can't be that bad." She smirked and nibbled on Carmilla's ear. "I'll make it worth your while." Elle said. 

"Stop it." Carmilla growled. Elle shook her head and snaked her hand to start unbuckling Carmilla's pants. "Elle, stop. Stop! Stop IT!" Carmilla shouted, shoving Elle off of her. Elle stood there, stunned for a moment. But Carmilla was too angry and in too much pain to care. "I'm in a lot of pain right now! Can you not tell from this!" She said, gesturing to the bloody wipes. Carmilla sighed. "Just, apply the next damned bandage and lets get this over with." Carmilla growled, trying to set her breathing so her ribs wouldn't expand and hurt as much. Elle simply glared at her, and crossed her arms. 

"You know there are two people in this relationship, Carmilla. The abuse doesn't just affect you." Elle snarled. Carmilla clenched her jaw shut and narrowed her eyes. She hardly ever got mad at Elle, but this struck a nerve. The abuse doesn't just affect _her_?

"What?" Carmilla growled.

"It affects me too." Elle repeated, placing her hands on her hips. Carmilla gritted her teeth.

"Oh, I'm sorry. You're right. This is about you. This is all about you, right. Right. I'm sorry I'm blind to see that my mother abuses you. Of course. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that you have to deal with my fucking scars. I'm sorry that you have to deal with me getting whacked across my back with a fucking belt because I didn't maintain proper posture! Sorry that you're the only one who can make me feel better and I have to keep fucking running to you. I'm sorry you have to help me once in a while when I'm in too much pain to help myself! I'm soo sorry that you can't get fucking finger banged because I'm in excruciating pain! This totally affects you! You're totally the one getting abused! I'm so fucking sorry!" Carmilla barked, her voice raising to a shout. Carmilla's fists were shaking next to her sides. She doesn't think she's ever been this angry; especially at Elle. She was always there for Carmilla, and now she's acting like this? Selfish? God, why was she so fucking blind? The world doesn't revolve around her. Elle scoffed.

"This is what I get for dating someone younger. I knew it was a bad idea. God, Carmilla. Why do you have to be so immature?" Elle grabbed her bag and stormed out of the bathroom. She heard the front door open and slam shut. The wave of panic that came with being alone started to wash over her, and she immediately regretted her tangent. She wanted Elle to come back, but right now she has to focus on fixing her back before she can go chasing after her. Carmilla sighed and started to apply the final bandage. Why can't she do anything right? Why does she always have to be an immature, insolent child?

She was going to have to apologize and make up for this to Elle. But for now, she needed to apply the final bandage and get out.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch sat with Lafontaine at a booth in McDonald's. The two had just gone suit-shopping for the upcoming Junior Dance next week, and they were enjoying their victory with greasy food and cheap soda. 

"I'm telling you bro. There's no need for math in science. It's like putting lettuce on cheeseburgers; it's just unnatural." Kirsch said, downing a sip of his soda. Lafontaine shook their head.

"Since when are these burgers natural?" Kirsch shrugged and took a large bite out of his burger (one that does NOT have lettuce because really, what kinda bro would ruin greasy goodness with a leaf?)

"Touche."

"But nah man, they work. They go hand in hand..." They grinned their shit-eating grin and Kirsch prepared for the worst. "Like you and Danny." Kirsch rolled his eyes. Last week, Danny and Kirsch were hanging out in his basement, waiting for everyone else to arrive for one of their hangouts. They were in the middle of a competition of who could do the most push ups.

 

_Kirsch was starting to get tired; he was strong, but didn't have a lot of stamina. He turned to see Danny still going at it, barely breaking a sweat. He could feel his muscles burning, and he was not about to loose to a Summer Psycho. Feeling threatened, he grabbed Danny's arm and tugged. She fell face down on the ground._

_"Oof!" Danny exclaimed as she hit the floor with a thud._

_"101, 102! Looks like you lose Lawrence!" Kirsch exclaimed with a lopsided grin. Danny picked herself off the ground and glared at him._

_"That was foul play." Danny growled, wiping her hands. "You knew I was beating you! What, is the only way you can win is by playing dirty?" Danny challenged, sitting up and leaning back on her palms. Kirsch shook his head._

_"No- no! I just thought you were pushing yourself too hard, and that you could use a hand. You're just mad because you lost!" Kirsch rallied. Danny furrowed her eyebrows._

_"I didn't lose; you cheated!"_

_"Nuh-uh!"_

_"Yuh-uh!"_

_"Nah bro- you're just seeing it wrong." Kirsch replied with a grin. He liked annoying Danny; and she was clearly getting agitated. She glared daggers at him. "You're just jealous because you don't have these babies." Kirsch replied, flexing his arms and kissing each muscle. Danny scoffed and rolled her eyes._

_"I have more muscle than you, moron." Kirsch looked offended, and lowered his arms._

_"No way D-bear. I just proved it by winning-"_

_"By cheating."_

_"Whatever. By winning/cheating that push up match." Danny huffed and crossed her arms._

_"That takes more stamina than muscle."  
_

_"Yeah, that's all you have; stamina. I'll admit for the sake of winning this argument that you were going to beat me, and yeah maybe I cheated. So because you have more stamina, you were going to beat me. But anything were you need more muscle than stamina I'll beat you in." He challenged with a grin. Danny narrowed her eyes and huffed._

_"Fine. I'll prove my strength in a muscle arm. Arm wrestle. You, me, right now." Danny challenged. Kirsch smiled. He clearly had more muscle than her, and arm wrestling is all about muscle. Plus, he'd never turn down an opportunity to beat the victorious Danny Lawrence. Especially when he just admitted defeat._

_"Deal." The two crossed their legs and rested their elbows on their knees, joined their right hands and tried to sized the other up. They glared at each other, both confident they would win._

_"On three." Danny said. Kirsch nodded in agreement._

_"One..."_

_"Two...'_

_"Three!" They said in unison, their arms fighting for dominance over the other. Kirsch had to admit; she was stronger than she looked. But the game seemed to be leaning towards him as his shaky arm started to dominate Danny's. He was too busy trying to intimidate Danny with his glare to notice his elbow was slowly sliding off his knee until it was too late. He lost his balance and jerked forward. His body crashed into Danny's._

_"Whoa!" Kirsch exclaimed as his shoulder decking her to the ground. He landed on top of her, Danny on her back._

_"Oh what the hell Kirsch!" Danny growled, and smacked him on the back of the head._

_"Ow..." He muttered, rubbing the sore spot. "I lost my balance." Kirsch said, as he untangled his arm from Danny's. He moved his hands next to Danny's head and lifted himself up._

_"I'm calling for a rematch." She growled. Kirsch shook his head and blinked his eyes._

_"Yeah, I agr-" His words died off as he looked down before him. Danny looked beautiful in that moment, her lips slightly parted, her hair sprawled out to the sides, her shirt slightly riled up to reveal a slither of her hip bone. It suddenly hit Kirsch the position they were in as he was hovering above her, their faces only inches apart. Danny seemed to come to the same realization as Kirsch._

_The moment turned intense as the two realized the position they were in. Their eyes darted to each other's lips. Kirsch's heart has never pounded harder than it was then. Kirsch, fearing that he was making her uncomfortable, slowly started to pull away. But it was like they were magnets, and Danny pushed forward, propping herself up on her elbow. Her other hand moved behind Kirsch's head and pulled him down. Before he knew it he was leaning down to kiss her, closing the distance between them. They were close, their noses touching when-_

_"Hey guys!" Kirsch immediately hopped off of Danny and scurried a good 5 feet away. They both looked to Lafontaine with panicked eyes. Were they just? Where they about to? Did Danny really? Was he really? "Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt anything." Lafontaine said, slowly growing a smirk. Danny and Kirsch exchanged a glance before turning to Lafontaine._

_"This never happened." Danny said._

_"You didn't see anything." Kirsch added. Lafontaine looked between the two and crossed their arms._

_"Alright, nothing was seen. Your secret is safe with me." Kirsch sighed out of relief, but couldn't stop his pounding heart and endless stream of thoughts. Time to think of dead grandmas and puppies._

_God damn it._

 

"What's going on between you two anyway?" Laf asked. Kirsch sighed and stirred his straw into his drink for a moment.

"Dunno. These sort of things happen a lot between us." Kirsch replied, taking a big bite out of his burger. "I mean, we don't mean for them to. But when somehthings about to go down, something interrupts us and it's like poof." He swallowed his bite. "Nothing ever happened. And I mean it would be nice to acknowledge it, but I guess it's not her thing. It's upsetting, but whatever." Lafontaine tapped their chin with their finger and nodded.

"Mhm. Mhm. I believe you're experiencing to be what is commonly known as a crush." Kirsch's eyes widened for a moment.

"A crush? Pfft, no. I mean Danny's cool and all, and yeah she's wicked pretty. She's amazing at sports, and wicked funny." He smiled to himself. "And her hair is always so soft and smells like flowers, and she actually challenges me, and doesn't treat me like I'm some dumb guy. I mean sometimes, but she believes in me in the end, y'know? Unlike a lot of other bros. When it comes down to it, she's a total bro. I mean, yes I would love for her to be my girlfriend. But who wouldn't, you know? She's a great chick." Kirsch looked back to Lafontaine to see them stifling their laughter. They raised their eyebrows.

"You don't have a crush, eh?" They replied smugly. It suddenly hit Kirsch like a freight train (whatever that meant, because that would hurt, and this was definitely not a hurtful realization); he has a crush on Danny Lawrence. 

"Oh my god I have a crush on Danny Lawrence." Kirsch said, his heart skipping a beat as he admitted this out loud. "Bro you gotta help me!" He exclaimed soon after. Lafontaine smiled.

"I've already got something in mind."

 

**Laura**

 

Laura snuck out the bathroom window from the restaurant. Which, in hindsight, probably wasn't the best escape route. Walking out the front door probably could've worked, but she was not about to risk letting the girl see her. Laura just had a horrid blind date with a girl from another town. Sure the girl was pretty, and nice. But Laura could say that about any girl, and plus this blind date (Jessica was it? Or Jessie? Did her name even begin with a J? Laura had no idea) had started to get too emotional for Laura's liking. That's the last time she allows Natalie to set her up with someone.

Laura stumbled out of the restaurant and made her way to the front. She whipped out her phone and scrolled through her contacts. The girl had picked her up, so she didn't have a ride back. 

Sure, Laura felt bad. She was going to apologize to the girl over text sometime later however. Laura had _some_ humane qualities. Really, Laura wasn't completely over her break up with Danny. Or at least, that's what Laura was telling herself. That was her first relationship, and the strongest she's ever felt for anyone. She tried hooking up with random girls again, but it didn't have the satisfaction as it used to. So she tried dating, and as you can probably guess that failed miserably.

Well, at least she tried.

Laura decided on calling Kirsch. He would be there for her; he always is. This isn't the first time he picked her up from a date gone wrong. She dialed his number and waited a couple rings before he picked up.

"Hey little nerd! How's the date going?" Laura sighed.

"It's not. I currently just climbed out the bathroom window and fled my brooding lover. Mind giving a girl a ride?" Laura asked, hiding behind a car incase the heartbroken girl inside decided to leave. She wasn't planning on letting the date girl see her and get mad.

"Not cool bro. Can't you just go back inside?" Laura groaned. She hated when Kirsch chastised her, mainly because he had a way of making her feel so guilty.

"I'm an emotional wreck. Please just come get me?" Laura said. She knew she could coerce Kirsch, and she was going to make it up to him somehow. She always does. Kirsch sighed on the other line.

"Fine. But is it cool if Laf comes with me?"

"Sure. Why, are they with you?" 

"Uh, yeah. Where are you?" Laura looked up to the illuminating sign.

"99's." Laura replied. 

"On our way."

"Thanks Kirsch. I owe you."

"Of course Laura." Laura smiled and hung up. She was lucky to have a friend like Kirsch. Well, now hiding between two suspicious-looking cars until her knight in shining armor arrived. 

 

**Lafontaine**

 

They piled into the driver seat of Kirsch's truck as he revved the engine.

"Why are we doing this again?" Lafontaine said, buckling in their seatbelt. Kirsch sighed and pulled out of the McDonald's.

"Because she wants me to." Kirsch retaliated with a shrug.

"She needs to learn that she can't keep using people like this. I get that somehow its a big screw you to Danny and probably her dad, and it's just her dealing with her emotions, but these girls have feelings too. She can't just use them." Lafontaine replied, running their hand through their hair. "I mean I love Laura, but she needs to learn a lesson." Kirsch paused for a moment, and it caught Laf's attention. 

"Maybe next time." He said, his eyes glued to the road ahead. They cocked an eyebrow.

"Why next time?" 

"Because she said she owes me." They huffed.

"So? She can owe you next time. You know she's bound to do this again." He shrugged. 

"I figure I can use it to convince her to let me ask Danny out." Kirsch replied. _Oh. So that's what this is about. It all circles back to Danny_ \- though that doesn't surprise Lafontaine. 

"Laura dumped Danny. Who Danny dates after that isn't her place to dictate."

"Yeah, but she's my little sister. It's totally not cool for me to date her ex without her permission- or clarification or whatever the word is. It's like against bro code or something." They sighed. He had a point, but Laura still needed to learn some sort of a lesson. "Look, I promise next time I'll make sure she understands she can't keep doing this or something. You know she'll listen to me." Lafontaine sighed once more. Yet again, he had a point. 

"Alright, fine. You promise next time?" Kirsch nodded excitedly and squirmed in his seat.

"Yeah, yeah! Of course." He smiled widely. Lafontaine turned to look at the passing cars. "Anyway, hows Perry?" Lafontaine took a deep breath. Perry was currently in rehab, which Lafontaine made her do. It had gotten out of control so Lafontaine told her parents. Perry felt that they had betrayed her trust, but no matter how many harsh words Perry spoke, they knew this was for the best. She hasn't spoken to them since she started the rehabilitation. Lafontaine texted her everyday however, and sent letters. Her mom kept them updated, and that's all they got. They just hoped that she still loves them. Somehow.

"Last time I heard, she was doing better. They hope to have her out in the next couple weeks are so." 

"Oh that's great!" Kirsch exclaimed. They shook their head.

"She still won't talk to me." They replied dismally.

"Well yeah, I mean she's probably pissed. But when those things are out of her system, she'll thank you and realize how great of a partner/best friend you are." Lafontaine smiled a bit. 

"You think so?" He scoffed.

"I know so." They allowed themselves to smile fully this time. His puppy-dog aura and vast amount of hope and positivity rubbed off on them, and for now they would allow themselves to just let it happen.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura practically sprinted to the familiar black truck. The blind date was standing outside of the restaurant with her phone in her hand, calling somebody, and Laura was not about to get caught hiding behind some stranger's truck.

She yanked Kirsch's car door open and dived inside.

"Go go go!" She exclaimed, fumbling with her buckle as she shut the door. Kirsch swerved out of the parking lot and onto the street. Laura took the few moments of silence to regain her breath. 

"That bad?" Kirsch asked, looking at her through the rear view mirror. Wanting to overplay her reasoning for ditching her date, she nodded. "You owe me big time then." Laura smiled breathlessly. Thank god for people like Kirsch.

"Of course. Anything." Laura replied. She went to go pull out her phone.

"Mind if I ask for it now?" Kirsch said, causing Laura to slowly lower the centuries-old device back down. 

"Uh, sure." A sudden silence hung in the air, and she looked between Kirsch and Laf, who seemed to be mouthing something to each other. Laf nodded, and Kirsch sighed.

"So, uh, well you're my best bro and all. You know that, right?" Laura furrowed her eyebrows.

"Right." Kirsch took a deep breath.

"So you know you I'd never hurt you on purpose." Laura's concern heightened. _Hurt me? Where is he going with this?_

"Yeah, I know."

"Okay. Well... I want to ask Danny out." Laura cringed. She stayed silent. He wants to ask Danny out? She wasn't cringing because it hurt, she was cringing because she wasn't hurt. All this time, she thought she was doing this because she wasn't over Danny. But if she wasn't over her, shouldn't this bother her? "And look I know it's like not cool for me to do, but I didn't mean to. I just caught feelings for her. And I totally get it if you don't want me to. I totally understand if-"

"Ask her out." Laura said, catching herself by surprise. 

"What?" Kirsch and Laf said in unison.

"Yeah. Ask her out. I'm not bothered by it. We broke up like a month ago; it doesn't matter." Laura was surprised at how little this actually bothered her. On some level, she always knew there was chemistry between the Kirsch and Danny, or at least something going on. Plus, she didn't have feelings for Danny anymore. She wasn't going to stop them from being together due to personal feelings. Yeah, Laura had a mature side. She's not always running from emotional girls in local Diners. But now, she didn't have an excuse for doing so.

"Oh, thanks Laura! I appreciate it." Kirsch said, and Laura smiled at the large, goofy grin plastered on his face. Yeah, shoving her feelings aside is worth it if it meant he was happy like that.

"No problem. You saved my ass back there, it's the least I can do. Besides, I'm over Danny. I'm not going to stop you two from being together." His smile got impossibly wider, and the three started discussing his plan to ask her out. Laura was going to have to think about why she kept doing what she was doing, and was going to avoid thinking about it for as long as possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments and kudos!


	10. Hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the night of the Junior dance, and the crew is doing their best to prepare.  
> Meanwhile Carmilla is trying to make up for the recent string of fights between her and Elle

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla sat in JP's basement, lamenting about her recent relationship problems with Elle while he played solitaire with himself. She lay on his floor, reading a book far above her age group's reading level. Carmilla took a sip of her drink, reading the pages mindlessly whilst she spoke.

"She just... I don't know. She's been a little insensitive about the abuse. I mean, I know that I'm probably being a dumb Junior or what not, but it still hurts sometimes. And I've been snapping at her recently, which is also myself just being an idiotic teenager. I need to do something to make up for it. I feel like I'm losing her when she's declared she's mine countless amount of times, you know?" Carmilla said. JP sighed.

"You know what I'm going to say." He replied. Carmilla huffed. "You don't have to constantly prove yourself to her. In a relationship between two people, no matter the age each parties-"

"Should be seen as equal. I know." Carmilla rested her book on her chest. "But she does see me as an equal. She's said so herself." JP shot Carmilla a look, and she rolled her eyes. "I didn't come here to be judged. I came here for your usual fatherly advice." He smirked.

"Only if you call me daddy." Carmilla laughed and threw her book at JP. He dodged the upcoming projectile and continued his game of solitaire. "What about that party tonight? Didn't you guys start dating at a party or whatever? I know she's going to one, so you could surprise her and say some sentimental crap." JP offered. Carmilla put her hands behind her head.

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea." Carmilla retaliated, smiling at the ideas already coming to her head.

"Of course it's a good idea; I suggested it." 

"Alright Einstein." Carmilla sat up and rested her elbows on her knees. "What do you suggest?" JP shrugged.

"Show up. Say your sorry, and say how you felt that time you guys got together and blah blah boring boring. Then you do the kissy kissy and make up." Carmilla chuckled.

"You know, for someone with a self proclaimed IQ of 135 you talk like a child sometimes." 

"It's not self proclaimed if it's true." Carmilla rolled her eyes and huffed. "I'm just saying it doesn't have to be some grand plan, or some large romantic gesture. You know how Elle is; she appreciates the small things. If you came in holding a boom box and shouting that you loved her, she'd dump you right then and there. Keep it simple and keep it short." Carmilla nodded.

"You're right. God damn it, why are you always right?" JP shrugged and placed one card over the other.

"I think with my head and not my heart." He said, tapping his head.

"I'll do that sometime." JP tossed Carmilla her book and the brunette started reading it again.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura stood awkwardly next to the refreshment table at Kirsch residence. The gang, along with a couple other Zetas and Society Sisters, were at Kirsch's house for a pre-party before the dance. Laura took all the photos she was required to be in already, so now all she could do is focus on not spilling the punch on her dress. 

The only reason she was huddled next to the refreshment table was because Danny was there. (Also a few girls she's hooked up with, but Danny was the major issue at hand. Figuratively and literally.) Danny and Laura hadn't really hung out since their break up, nor had normal conversations for that matter. Laura's been avoiding her all night in fear of confrontation, and the possibility of her babbling Kirsch's plan to ask her out.

It was a stupid plan really.

Kirsch was close with the DJ, so the DJ was going to let him say a couple things. Kirsch was going to announce that the next song was for "a special red head", then make some speech on how great the night is going to be, and to have a good time. Then he was going to find Danny, and say something cheesy like "this is for you. Date me!" or something like that, Laura thinks. She wasn't really paying attention when Laf and Kirsch started developing the plan. All she knew was that she didn't have to do anything to contribute.

Her worst fears came true when the particular ginger slowly approached the refreshment table. Danny started to pour a drink into her cup, and Laura gave a tight smile and an awkward wave. Danny nodded to her.

"Uh, hey." Laura said. The awkwardness between them was nearly palpable. 

"Hey." Danny replied. Silence hung between them, and my god was it uncomfortable. Laura suddenly was really interested in her nails, and how weirdly shaped they were. She wondered if she should paint them, because wow her nails were abruptly the most interesting thing in the room. And- "You look nice tonight." Danny suddenly said. Laura was taken aback for a moment, apparently wrong in the assumption that they were going to avoid each other. Laura eyed Danny up and down. She had on a dark grey dress that hugged her curves nicely. Laura smiled.

"Thanks. You look good yourself." Laura replied, gesturing to her dress. 

"Uh, thanks." She replied. The silence came back again, and whoa what type of paint did they use for the ceiling? It's suddenly incredibly fascinating to Laura. She looked around a bit more, but her eyes landed back on Danny, who was staring down at her drink. She chewed on the inside of her cheek, and Laura refrained a groan, knowing an apology was coming. "Look, Laura-" Laura held her hand up before she could continue.

"Let's not ruin the night with a cheesy 'I'm sorry' talk. We both messed up, and we're both sorry. Let's just leave it at that. Okay?" Danny released a heavy sigh of relief and nodded.

"I'm okay with that." Danny said, smiling for real this time. Laura passed the smile back. They had a brief moment of unity before Danny spoke again. "Anyway, I should probably get back. Mel wants to take pictures of Kirsch and I." Laura nodded.

"Have fun." Danny waved her goodbye and rejoined the rest of the group. Laura watched the way Kirsch and Danny acted around each other, and couldn't help but smile.

She just hopes whatever plan he has in mind have works.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla hopped out of her car and prepared herself to walk into the party. She wasn't exactly sure what she was going to say; she went straight from JP's and to the party, leaving herself no time to over think it. Carmilla knew that Elle wouldn't want to listen to a big I'm sorry speech, so she was just going to keep it short and simple. A few sentences and some sentimental phrases then she's done.

That's all.

Carmilla listened to the music pounding throughout the house. Who's party was this again? Max? Whatever. She has more important things to think about. Like how she's going to give an "I'm sorry" speech without actually giving one. _Let's just hope this doesn't go to shit_. Carmilla thought as she welcomed herself into the party house.

Carmilla looked around for the blonde, denying drinks and shoving past the drunken dancers. Where is she? She can't be that hard to find. She always stayed in the rooms with the least amount of people, so maybe she should go there. 

Carmilla denied a few more drinks offered to her and walked into a smaller room with a little crowd. It was less stuffy in this room, and she could actually breath. Carmilla moved past a couple making out and saw Elle, but her heart immediately shattered.

There Elle was, on a couch, with a girl. A girl she was locking lips with, her hand is up the girl's shirt.

Was the ground even there anymore? Did everyone leave? She felt as though she was the only one in the room along with the feeling of betrayal and anger. Her heart sunk to the pit of her stomach, a solemn feeling she's never quite felt before washing over her. But it didn't last long, as immediately after a white-hot anger built up. Carmilla clenched her fists by her side. 

Acting out of blind rage, she snatched a drink from some random girls's hand. She heard the girl protest, but ignored her. Carmilla walked right up to Elle and splashed the beverage in her face, trying to not hit the girl she was kissing. Elle gasped and pulled away. She wiped the alcohol out of her eyes with a grunt and hiss of pain, and looked to see her attacker. Elle's eyes widened when she lifted her gaze to Carmilla's angry glare.

"How could you!" Carmilla nearly shouted, throwing the cup at Elle and storming out of the room. She was beyond angry. She didn't care enough about the bouncing bodies around her. She thinks that she walked right through the middle of someone grinding, but she wasn't sure.

Carmilla just needed to get out of there; out of there and away from Elle. Away from the memory of Elle's hand up another girl's shirt. Away from the pain residing inside of her. She just needed to get out- and fast.

She felt the cool air hit her face as tears threatened to spill. No, no she wasn't going to cry. Carmilla didn't cry- that's not her thing. Carmilla Karnstein doesn't cry... But god damn it, how could Elle do this to her? Out of everything they've been through, out of everything she's done for her! Did she really love her in the first place? Or was it all a lie? Carmilla started to think it over, cursing herself for being so blindly in love. Carmilla felt a hand on her shoulder and she whipped around.

"Baby let me explain!" Elle exclaimed, out of breath from her chase of Carmilla.

"What is there to explain? You want to give me the details on how your tongue felt in her mouth? Why don't you share her breast size while your at it?" Carmilla barked back.

"36 C." Elle said with a mischievous smirk. Carmilla shoved Elle's shoulders.

"Fuck you!" Carmilla shouted. She started to storm away to her car, Elle following close behind her, but her steps not quick enough to Carmilla's.

"Come on, wait! Don't be like that! I was just kidding, baby please!" Carmilla whirled around and crossed her arms, tears filling her eyes and clouding her vision.

"What is there to say?" Carmilla snapped. Elle stumbled over words for a moment.

"I- I- I thought we were broken up." Carmilla clenched her jaw. She knew damn well they weren't broken up.

"That's bullshit and you know it." Carmilla growled through gritted teeth. 

"Look, I'm sorry okay? It won't happen again." Elle said, taking a step towards Carmilla. "Come on, babe. You know how I get." She caressed her cheek, and for a moment she wanted to fall for it. Fall for her soothing words and cunning smile. Wanted to take in her apology and forget the ache in her heart. To wrap her arms around Elle and listen to her pleas and promises that she'll try better. But Carmilla was done, JP has been right this whole time. She was a manipulative cheating bitch. (Not JP's words, but Carmilla's version of it). Carmilla smacked Elle's hand away.

"No. You know what? NO! I'm tired of you manipulating me! I'm tired of you always making me feel like I'm lesser, like I always have something to prove! It's not right! And I was so blindly in love before to see it, but now I see the actual monster you are! You're so..." She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. "You're so fucked up!" Carmilla shouted, throwing her hands in the air with rapid gestures. Elle narrowed her eyes.

"I should have known you would act immaturely." This set off something inside of Carmilla, something with deep hatred and rage.

"NO!" Elle seemed taken aback by Carmilla's shout. Elle seemed self-conscious at how loud Carmilla was being, knowing full well she was causing a scene. But Carmilla didn't care. "THIS ISN'T IMMATURE!" She screamed, taking a hostile step forward. Elle took a step back, eyes wide. "This is how anyone would react to being cheated on! Age has nothing to do with this! I'm not any less of an equal in this relationship than you!" Carmilla was almost screaming now, attracting the attention of outside partiers. But Carmilla was too angry and too hurt to care. Elle gritted her jaw side to side.

"You know what?" Elle said, crossing her arms. "I'm glad your mom abuses you." Carmilla's jaw locked, and Elle had a devilish look on her face. She turned around, but looked over her shoulder at Carmilla. "You deserve it." And with that, Elle stormed away to the party. Carmilla stood there for a moment, completely shell shocked. She wanted to chase after Elle, apologize for her hissy fit. Her feet were too heavy; she couldn't move. 

Why did she just do that? The only person she's ever loved... The only person to ever love her... No, she's right. She deserves this. Her mother always said so; that she's worthless, that she deserves the abuse, that she doesn't deserve anything good to happen to her. But Elle was the only person who ever convinced Carmilla otherwise, and now... Now even she agrees. Now even Elle knows she's the scum of the earth.

Heart heavy and mind drawing blanks, Carmilla clambered in her car and started driving. She wasn't sure where, she just needed to get away. There was one person she could call, one person who wasn't here to know everything. Someone she could pour her heart out to and they'd listen; Will.

She ended up in some parking lot on the outskirts of town. She pulled out her phone and dialed Will's number with shaky hands, hoping that he'd answer. After transferring through a couple lines, he finally picked up.

"Kitty! Hey! I was about to call you actually." Carmilla smiled as tears streamed down her cheeks. It was so good to hear his voice again. She needed that- she needed him right now. Will and his chipper attitude, his positive outlook on things, his comforting words and loving personality.

"Hey." She choked out.

"Oh no, what's wrong? Did mom hurt you again?" Will replied with concern. Carmilla shook her head.

"No it's... It's Elle. We broke up. I just wanted to talk to you." Carmilla started to rub her forehead and leaned her elbow against the car door. 

"Oh I'm sorry Kitty..." Normally, Carmilla wouldn't stand for that. She hated pity. She hated when people would apologize for her, but right now, it was the most comfort she's had in months. Carmilla missed Will, so much.

"Thanks." She managed to say.

"Of course." Carmilla wasn't sure if her need to cry was stronger or lesser. She just knew that this was bittersweet right now. She felt better because she was talking to Will, but felt worse because he was miles and miles away.

"I miss you." Carmilla muttered. Will sighed heavily.

"I miss you too, Carmilla." Carmilla swallowed in an attempt to soothe the tightening in her throat. She needed to hear that, to know that somebody's thinking about her. That somebody misses her. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "So, why were you going to call me?" She asked. Carmilla swore she almost heard Will squeal.

"I have good news." Carmilla perked up a bit. Good news? She hardly hears good news. Is he coming home? Carmilla shoved away all of her hopes, wanting to know what it was about before getting herself worked up.

"What about?" She asked. 

"The whole entire custody thing." Carmilla brightened up even more. Since Will was in the military, and Carmilla wasn't going to go into foster care, no one could take her into custody. They had no other family for Carmilla, only her mother. So Will has been trying to figure something out, and hes only ever told her bad news. Good news is rare. Good news is not something she has every associated with "custody." 

"What happened?" He took a big breath on the other line.

"Carmilla, we have a sister. Her name is Matska Belmonde, and she's agreed to meet you. There's hope, Kitty. There's hope." Carmilla could have sworn her heart stopped in that very moment. She could've sworn that the world stopped turning. That there could possibly be a god, and that maybe the world wasn't always against her after all. Hope? She's never had hope. To her, hope was poison. But now... There's hope.

There's finally hope.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

They sat in the cafeteria, staring down at a pizza slice on their plate. The dance was taking place in the gym next door; pop and electronic music blasting. Occasionally the door would open and someone would walk through, and they could almost hear what they were playing as it was less muffled for that moment. Once in a while they heard a song that they liked, but that was it. They had to be going back in soon anyway. In 5 minutes, Kirsch was going to make his announcement for Danny. They had to be there for that at least; no matter how sad they were feeling.

All they could think about is how much they wanted Perry here. She would have loved it. They can only imagine what kind of dress she would wear, how she would freak out if Lafontaine's tie didn't match her dress. Lafontaine smiled at the thought of Perry freaking out over the dance. She'd be saying how everything would have to be perfect, every little detail would be planned out, and she would flip if everything didn't go as planned. Even greasy pizza couldn't make this empty feeling go away. 

They groaned and shoved their plate away. They pulled up their sleeve looked down at their digital watch strapped tightly on their wrist.

**8:18**

They have a few more minutes to go before Kirsch does his thing, and Laf does not want to miss it. Hell, they planned the whole thing. What kind of scientist would they be if they didn't see how their experiment played out?

Lafontaine sighed and were about to get up, when Laura took a seat next to her. Her hair was disheveled and lipstick was smeared on her lips. Lipstick? Laura didn't wear lipstick coming here. Lafontaine rolled their eyes.

"You look a little too grumpy for a dance." Laura said, nudging Lafontaine with her elbow. Lafontaine sighed heavily as if that would ease the ache in their heart.

"It's not the same without Perry." They replied, staring down at their knotted fingers. Laura placed her hand on their knee, and they back looked up. She was smiling. Why would she be smiling? Is their Lafonpain that amusing? (They'll have to write that one down later).

"Come on. There's something I want you to see." Laura said as she stood up. They sighed- they weren't up for surprises.

"Sure, L. Just let me toss out my pizza." They replied.

"That can wait. Come on." Laura hooked her arm in theres and started pulling them to the dance floor. _What's going on?_ They wondered, going through different theories and possibilities of what it could be. "Now, don't be mad at Kirsch. He didn't tell anyone. Hell he literally just told me. I mean, don't be mad at him. He kinda used your smarts for this, and-"

"What's going on?" They asked, too dismal to hear Laura's rambling. Her smile somehow got wider.

"You'll see." She said with a sly smile. They sighed. _Might as well._

They walked into the gym, and suddenly the music stopped. _This must be Kirsch's announcement._  Lafontaine thought. Is this what Laura wanted them to see? Laura brought a confused Lafontaine to the center of the dance floor and they looked to Kirsch, who was standing next to the DJ with the microphone in his hand. _Why did she tell me to not be mad at him?_

"You guys enjoying the dance?" He called out. People hooted and howled in response. Lafontaine eyed Laura strangely, but she gestured for them to continue to watch Kirsch. "Awesome! Now, I know we all love the sexy songs and bumpin' techno music, but I'm going to have to put a hold on that for a moment." The crowd awe'd for a moment, but he gestured for them to quiet down. "We have a special someone here in the crowd today. So Lafontaine, if you would turn around." Lafontaine looked to Laura, who was beaming at them. Flustered from all the attention, they turned around to see Perry in the center of the dance floor, a clearing made for her. She was wearing a dark blue dress (matching Laf's tie, of course), and red lipstick. Perry's hair was tamed a bit, and she sported a wide smile. Lafontaine's heart started banging in their chest as an uncontainable excitement bubbled in their stomach.

"Perr!" They exclaimed, not being able to stop their feet as they ran to her. She wrapped their arms around their neck as Lafontaine pulled them into a bone-crushing hug. Suddenly, it felt like no one else was in the room. People weren't howling or hooting, no one was staring; it was just Perry and Lafontaine. Their world was finally put into place again. "What are you doing here?" They exclaimed, pulling back. 

"I wanted to surprise you!" She replied. Lafontaine smiled widely. 

"How'd you- what?" There were so many emotions and thoughts rushing through their head that they could barely formulate words.

"It's all thanks to Kirsch." Lafontaine looked to Kirsch, who gave them a thumbs up. Lafontaine laughed and looked back to Perry. They missed her wide smile and blue eyes; her curly hair and cute dimples. They stared at each other for a moment, smiling wide and holding each other.

"KISS HER BRO!" A dude screamed from the crowd. Laf and Perry laughed, but they pulled her in for a kiss, earning the crowd to holler and cheer for the reunited couple. Lafontaine couldn't believe it, and my god how they missed her. 

"This next song is dedicated to you guys!" Kirsch exclaimed. Perry pulled back and stared at Lafontaine with adoration, making them feel like their heart could burst in any passing second. Halo by Beyonce started to play, and everyone started dancing again. The silence was gone and the spot light that was put on them disappeared as bodies started slow dancing around whilst the song boomed. Chatter continued, along with people shouting lyrics.

"How? Why? Just, what! I'm so excited I can't generate sentences!" Lafontaine exclaimed. Perry moved their hands to clasp Lafontaine's neck as they swayed together. 

"I told Kirsch that I wanted to come and surprise you. So, he asked you what he should do to ask out Danny, but used your advice and planning on me instead. We talked back and forth for a while, making plans. He planned the whole thing himself, well secretly with you too but you didn't know. Then, tonight he told a few Zetas and got everyone in on it. So, with Kirsch's help and a lot of hard work here I am! Surprise!" Lafontaine squealed, and they kissed Perry once more. They had so many questions, so much to say and so much to apologize for.

"Listen I-" They began.

"Not tonight, Laf." Perry cut off, seeming to already know what they were going to say. "Tonight, just dance with me. We can talk about it all later. Let's just be happy we're back together, okay?" They smiled, and nodded their head. 

"Okay." The two swayed back and forth for what seemed like forever, happy to be back in each other's arms once again.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch jumped off the mini stage and into the crowd. Okay, now it's time to ask out Danny. Ask out Danny Lawrence- he can do this. He's just pulled off a major plan with Lafontaine and Perry all by himself. He can ask a girl out- right? What was his plan again? Kirsch stopped his search for a moment to recollect his thoughts. He had been juggling so many plans between getting Perry here, and having the Zetas help, and just making this big surprise for Lafontaine that his own plan was all mixed up in his head. Oh that's right- he was going to slow dance with her. She said this was her favorite song. He picked up his head and began his search again.

Kirsch spotted the red head and his heart skipped a beat. He can do this. It's just Danny, who looks super pretty tonight, and looks amazing in that dress, and oh my god can he do this? He saw her smile at something someone said, and he smiled too.

He can.

As he approached her, some guy suddenly grabbed Danny by the hips and started to grind against her. Kirsch stopped in his tracks, his heart sinking to the pit of his stomach. It started to pick back up when Danny shoved the guy away. 

"Back off!" Danny growled, crossing her arms.

"Oh come on. Dance with me." He said, trying to grab her hips again. She pried his hands off of her. Kirsch felt a rage bubbling inside of him. He knew Danny could handle herself, but he couldn't help but want to intervene. He wanted to help. No bro should try and violate a girl, and the fact that it was Danny only added to his anger.

"Back. Off." She snarled, her hands balled into fists as she glared at the taller guy. 

"What? It's just dancing." The guy replied, going to grab her again. _Okay, that's it._ Before he could stop himself, Kirsch stepped in and pushed the guy back a little.

"Bro, back off. The girl said no." Kirsch said lowly, glaring at the guy. The bro crossed his arms and glared back to Kirsch, a smug look on his expression. Kirsch was tall, but this guy was taller. However, Kirsch knew that it didn't matter. Danny would take the guy out even if Kirsch couldn't.

"Oh yeah? And what are _you_ going to do about it?" He retaliated, taking a hostile step towards him. Kirsch laughed loudly.

"Me? You shouldn't worry about what _I'm_ going to do to you. You should worry about what _she's_ going to do to you." Kirsch replied, taking a side-step closer towards Danny.

"That's right. You'll wake up with your tiny _dick_ cut off and shoved up your ass!" The guy looked towards Danny, panic washing over his face. His color drained at the extremely explicit threat. With a nervous gulp, he held his hands up and he retreated to the crowd, escaping the death glare she gave. Kirsch placed a hand on her broad back. "You good?" Danny nodded and ran a hand through her hair.

"Yeah, yeah." She smiled at him. He wanted to ask her out, but she looked like she was ready to beat the living hell out of someone. Maybe he should wait for her to cool down a bit before making his move.

"You want to go outside? Get a breather?" Danny nodded. He made sure no one in the crowd touched her (because seriously anything could set this girl off right now) as he led her through the gym and out to the caf. He then walked her out to the benches out to the back of the school. Danny took a seat, swinging one leg over the bench. Kirsch mirrored her movements so they were facing each other. 

"You doing okay?" He was relieved when she nodded her head. "God, what an asshole."

"I know! Like who gave him the right!"

"Honestly! I never wanted to punch a bro more in my life. You don't do that. You just don't."

"I know!" Danny huffed, crossing her arms.

"Besides. Halo? Who the hell grind to Halo by Beyonce?" Kirsch calmed down a bit when Danny broke into a small smile at the remark, followed by a huff of a laugh. It was silent for a few moments. He waited for her to say something, seeing if she wanted to let out any more anger. But instead, she fiddled with the hem of her dress.

"Uh, thanks, by the way. You really helped." Danny said with a tight nod. Kirsch shrugged.

"No biggie. You didn't need my help anyway- I know you could've knocked him out with just a pinky." He said with a grin. Danny chuckled and moved herself so she was sitting normally on the bench. Kirsch couldn't help but notice how pretty she looked under the lights outside; the way her hair glimmered, her pale skin seeming to glow, her blue eyes full of an emotion Kirsch couldn't quite make out. Kirsch sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. He needed to ask her out before he got too nervous.

"So... I was thinking..." He began, trying to figure out what he was going to say.

"Really? I didn't think you were capable." Danny teased, nudging him with her shoulder. But it was different, usually she was ruthless with her teasing, but this was gentle and caring. It only encouraged Kirsch. 

"I'm, uh, serious and stuff." Danny waited patiently for him to continue. Kirsch's heart started to pound, and he started going over the signs of a heart attack in his head- just in case. "Oh man. You know what? I was going to ask you out. I had this big plan planned out in my head, and I was gonna slow dance with you. Then I was gonna ask you out and it was gonna be-" Danny cut him off by planting a short, chaste kiss to his lips. WHOA WHAT? BRO IS SHE KISSING HIM? His heart felt like it was trying to make a run for it in his chest, his stomach doing tumbles, his legs feeling like jello. When she pulled back, Kirsch stared off into the distance for a moment. What was earth again? He wasn't floating, right? This was real? He looked to Danny. Yeah, this was real. This was real and Danny Lawrence just kissed him. Oh my god Danny Lawrence just kissed him!

"You don't need a big plan to convince me to go out with you." Danny said softly. He cocked his head.

"Really?" She shook her head.

"I don't need a grand gesture, Kirsch. I just..." Danny looked down at her knees. "I just need you." She said bashfully. Kirsch swung his leg over the bench and scooted closer. He wrapped a lanky arm around her, and she picked her head up to look at him. Kirsch smiled, and Danny smiled back.

"So, that's a yes right?" He asked, just in case. Sometimes, you never know with this girl. Danny laughed and nudged him with her elbow.

"Yes! Yes I will go out with you, Kirsch." Kirsch smiled wider than he ever had in his life, and he swore he could never be happier.

"Alright, cool. Good, good." They stayed like that for a moment until Danny looked up at the sky.

"I think that one looks like a heart." She said, resting her head on his shoulder. Kirsch thought it looked more like a butterfly, but for tonight, he was going to keep that in. For just this one night, he was going to let her win, just like how she won him over. He no longer can only hope she feels the same; he knows it. Just tonight, he'll let her have it her way. He rested his cheek on top of her head and stared up at the heart-butterfly. 

"Yeah, that's definitely a heart." 

 

**Laura**

 

Laura lay on top of the school's roof, gazing at the stars. They really should get better locks for the door to the roof. All it took was a bobby pin and a beginner's knowledge on lock picking and she got through.

Laura was thinking over her life, all the decisions she's made, the people she's hurt. She hated the way she was. 

Laura always thought for herself most of the time, trampling over other people's feelings for her own benefit. She hated how she used girls like that, throwing them away the next. Why was she like this? So needy, so selfish, so carefree. It's like she only saw three feet in front of her and everything/everyone else was a blur. I mean sure, she was nice. But sometimes she really didn't care about other people if it got in the way of her own needs.

She wasn't always like this.

There was a time when she cared, perhaps too much even, about the people around her. There was a time when she would do random kind things for people for nothing in return. She wouldn't even expect anything in return even; and always put other people before herself. What changed that? Why was she so terrible now?

Laura sighed, and staring at the stars she decided then and there that she was going to change. She was going to be a better person; Laura Hollis 2.0.

She was going to fix herself, one way or another. She was going to start with the best way she knew how, the one thing she's always been, the one thing that has gone back to her roots; she was going to start by going into journalism again.

Her perfect self-epiphany moment was ruined when she heard the door to the roof creak open. She jolted up to see a blonde girl, slowly looking around the area.

"You know," she said, closing the door behind her, "they really need better locks around here." Laura started to calm down when she realized that the girl was a student. She wore a short blue dress, her hair tied up in a side twist. She had on black flats and sported a black cardigan. Laura eyed the girl up and down. She was pretty, and definitely someone Laura would hook up with. Too bad the girl didn't come up before she decided to stop hooking up with girls. Laura sighed.

"I guess. But then again if they did that, I wouldn't get to come up here." Laura said, laying back down and putting her hands behind her head. "So why are you up here?" She asked. Laura propped a knee up and rested her leg over it.

"Well I saw you take off. You weren't crying, or drunk, nor did you leave with someone so I figured it was worth looking into." The girl replied casually, taking small steps toward her. Laura snickered.

"Didn't expect this, huh?" Laura asked. 

"Not at all." Laura smiled.

"I'm Laura Hollis by the way." Laura greeted. The girl stood beside her for a moment, and Laura got a good look at her face. Why couldn't she come up before she decided to not hook up with girls?

"I know." The girl said to Laura's surprise. The blonde plopped down next to Laura, hugging her knees to her chest. Laura propped herself up on her elbows. "Everyone knows who you are." She added with a smile.

"Is that so?" Laura replied, smirking back. The blonde nodded.

"Mhm. And apparently you're an amazing locksmith." She said, pointing her jaw to the door. Laura huffed.

"Oh please. A bobby pin and a general knowledge of lock picking was all it took to get up here." 

"Impressive."

"In a way." The two chuckled, and the blonde shook her head to herself. She has to find out who this girl is. "So who are you?" The girl extended her hand to Laura.

"I'm Alice." Laura smiled, and slid her hand in hers, shaking it softly. Maybe she can be the one to hold her down. Maybe theres hope for Laura to change her ways after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the comments and kudos!  
> Y'all are wonderful


	11. Worlds Collide

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we do a time hop here, and Carmilla is 20 while Laura is 19.  
> THIS IS THE CHAPTER SO GET EXCITED!!

**Laura**

 

Starting Silas University has to be one of the scariest things Laura has ever done- or about to. The only thing making it worthwhile was having her friends with her.

Senior year, Laura had gotten into a relationship with a girl named Alice. Long story short, she's a bitch and it all went to hell. After she ended the horrid relationship, Laura decided to take a year off before starting Silas University. She spent half the year traveling around with her father Europe, and the other half staying at home. It was nice for a while, but Laura was now ready to go back to reality and start Silas University.

Once she had finished her year off and returned, her, Lafontaine, and Perry bought an apartment- which she really couldn't have asked for a better arrangement. The apartment was in walking distance of the Uni, and it was in a small city called Styria. Kirsch and Danny lived on campus; Kirsch in a fraternity house and Danny in her sorority home. She doesn't understand how they are still together really. They fight a lot, and are always in competitions, but somehow they make it work. 

Laura was setting up her things in the apartment while Perry cleaned around and Lafontaine carried in boxes, lecturing Lafontaine on why they shouldn't take samples of mold growing in the bathroom. To which they responded; "Hey, if we're going to have the bubonic plague growing in our bathroom I'd like to at least be able to experiment on it."

Lafontaine was a bio major at Silas, and Perry didn't attend school. She instead works as a teacher's aide at a local preschool and as a part time nanny/ baby sitter. Unsurprisingly, the two are still going strong as well. Laura sometimes feels like the two are her parents in a weird way; mainly due to Perry's motherly nature and Lafontaine's dad-like humor. 

"You still have that yellow pillow, huh?" Lafontaine said, carrying in the last of Laura's stuff in cardboard boxes. Laura smiled down at the yellow pillow on her bed.

"Yeah. Never had the heart to get rid of it." She said, tracing the fabric with her hand. There was a reason she couldn't, and she was sure Lafontaine knew there was. Inside the pillow held a part of her heart, and she couldn't leave it behind. There were so many memories were carved into this pillow- there was no way she'd get rid of it.

"Cool. Well, if you need help unpacking, give a roomie a holler." Laura nodded, and Lafontaine left the room.

The walls were painted a light green, which Laura planned on repainting once she got moved in. The floors were wooden with a dark blue carpet. A small bed was pressed in a corner, on the other side a tiny closet. At the end of her bed was the bathroom. Between the two walls was the third one, which had one large window. The ceiling wasn't exactly high, but not too low either. Laura sighed with content.

This was going to be amazing.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla grabbed her black hoodie and carelessly pulled it over her head, only a black tank top underneath. She was about to go to work, so there wasn't a lot of time for a wardrobe change. Carmilla had her dream job of working at a small library- all thanks to Mattie really. Carmilla lived in a small city called Styria with JP- also thanks to Mattie. Everything was thanks to Mattie, really.

It was the summer going into Senior year when she moved to Austria to live with Mattie. Carmilla and Will got their mother sent to jail, and Mattie took custody over her and Will. Once that happened, Carmilla moved to Austria. Oddly enough, JP's aunt got a job there as well, and the two ended up only a few towns apart. JP then started to attend Silas University, and once Carmilla turned 19, Mattie said that she wanted Carmilla to start living her life, and offered to help. Mattie felt bad that Carmilla spent so many years alone and beaten, and wanted Carmilla to live the best life she could as long as she was under her care. So, Carmilla decided to set off on her own and buy an apartment with the money her dad left for her (which she didn't even know she had until Mattie informed her so). Carmilla eventually got lonely, and offered for JP to live with her. She never used the extra bedroom anyway, so it was a good trade.

Will was still in the military, but he's alive. And that's what Carmilla tried to focus on.

Carmilla couldn't have asked for a better arrangement when she started living with Mattie. Mattie's a highly successful business woman, and even owns Silas University. Carmilla moved to a mansion, greeted by Mattie's welcoming arms. It took a while for Carmilla to recover, but with help from her new, loving sister and with JP always by her side, she eventually transitioned. Though she's changed drastically.

She's no longer the sensitive, easily manipulated, doormat that she once was. Now, she was cold, and sometimes a little harsh. Carmilla had grown a fear of getting hurt again, of feeling worthless and unlovable, so instead she chose to push people away using snarky comments and insensitivity. Really, Carmilla was still insecure and vulnerable. But the only people close enough to know this are JP, Mattie, and Will. She plans to keep it that way.

"I'm heading to work! Make sure to feed Mircalla!" Carmilla called to JP before closing the door. Oh yeah- and they had a cat. Mircalla was a two year old small black cat that's the sweetest thing that could be. Carmilla got the cat as a present from Mattie. She was more of a dog person, but made an exception for the tiny cat. She locked the apartment door before trekking to her job. Carmilla was always about 5 minutes early to her job, never a day late.

That's not changing today.

 

**Laura**

 

After hours of moving around, carrying heavy boxes, unboxing said boxes, and setting up the apartment, they were finally almost done. Lafontaine, Perry, and Laura celebrated this nearly-finished process by sitting around their new kitchen table with a couple of grape sodas. Laura stretched out her arms and released a loud groan. 

"I haven't done this much exercise since field day in the 8th grade." Laura said, taking a long sip of her soda. Her muscles were burning and she could already tell she was going to be soar for the next couple days. Or years. Maybe the rest of her life... Yeah, Laura didn't exercise much.

"Hm. But it's oh-so worth it." Lafontaine replied, resting their arm on the back of Perry's chair. Laura looked around the small apartment.

The living room and the kitchen were connected. The living room had a couch and a black arm chair that faced a TV pressed against a wall, a window on either side of the TV. In the center was an old, wooden coffee table that rested on top of a black carpet with different designs on it. The kitchen had black and white tiles on the floor and included a fridge, a stove, a counter, a sink, and top cabinets and counters that ran along the walls. On opposite walls of the kitchen were Lafontaine and Perry's room, and across from that Laura's room. It was a cute little apartment, and Laura was grateful she had it, and got to live in it with two of her best friends.

"Agreed." Laura said. Laura held out her soda can. "To new apartments, new jobs, and new schools." Laura said. The three clinked their soda cans together and chugged down a few sips.

"We're going to have to go grocery shopping. We can't live off of carbonated sugar." Perry said, twisting her can along the table to read the contents inside. Laura rolled her eyes. She's _not_ replacing sugary goodness with healthy alternatives.

"We'll go shopping and be health-conscious later. For now, how about we go get a celebratory lunch, yeah?" Laf offered. Perry and Laura muttered agreements. The three downed the rest of their sodas and put on proper attire and headed out.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch sat on a bench on campus, waiting patiently for Danny. This is where she said to meet him, right? This is the bench? Kirsch looked around for the tall red head, but she was nowhere in sight. He was worried it was something bad, but then again they haven't seen each other in a few days, so maybe she missed him. Or maybe she was going to break up with him. Is she dumping him? Did she do something wrong? Oh god what if she- Kirsch couldn't finish the thought when he felt slender arms wrap around his shoulders and neck.

"Looking for me?" She muttered, planting a kiss on his cheek. Oh... _No dumping_. The uncontainable smile he always got when he's around her spread to his cheeks. He hopped off the bench and pulled Danny in for a hug, picking her up. Danny laughed as he started to spin her around. "Your form is weak." Danny teased as Kirsch set her down. _Weak?_ Kirsch quirked an eyebrow.

"My form is weak? Have you seen these puppies?" Kirsch replied, flexing his arms in an attempt to impress his girlfriend. "Someone call the vet because these pythons are _sick_!" Danny shook her head with a chuckle, and he tried to get her approval by flexing them in different angles.

"Please. I've seen children with more muscle than you." Kirsch took offense to that. He squinted at her and crossed his arms. _Oh it's on, D-bear._

"Do you think you could do better?" He challenged. Danny smirked and shrugged. 

"Might as well try." Danny wrapped her arms around Kirsch's waist and, with a bit of a struggle, she managed to pick him up. Kirsch had to admit- he was impressed, and fairly surprised that she could get his feet to lift off the ground. But he wasn't about to let her know that.

" _That_ was weak." Kirsch said, dropping down to his feet. He picked up Danny by the waist and threw her over his shoulder. Kirsch started walking around, a squirming Danny on his shoulder.

"Put me down!" She said between giggles. Those giggles caused a smile on Kirsch's cheeks so wide it practically covered his whole face. To Kirsch, she had the most adorable laugh (though to everyone else it was loud). Kirsch started walking down the path they were on.

"Nope. Not doing that." Danny squirmed some more in his arms, laughing and banging her fists gently against his back. Moments like this always happened between them; it was heated and competitive one moment, then laughing and loving the next. It was hard to keep up with, but Kirsch wouldn't have it any other way.

As long as he had them with Danny.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura walked along with Lafontaine and Perry, the happy couple huddled close together in the crisp Autumn air. From what Laura's seen, she likes the city. The shops were small, the buildings not too big, the people not too bad. They sky was clear and not as polluted as she feared it might be, and the streets were relatively clean considering it's a city.

"Hey we're going to check this store out real quick. Do you mind setting us up at the diner?" Lafontaine asked, stopping in front of a store window. Laura was about to protest, when she saw that it was some weird place with a lot of cat statues, and oddly designed rugs. _No thank you._

"Sure! Just come find me after, yeah?" They nodded and dragged Perry into the shop. Perry muttered something about how dirty the windows were before disappearing into the weird cat-statue place. Laura snickered and shook her head to herself. _Those two are unbelievable._  She continued her walk down the street. 

How far was it? Not far, right? Or at least that's what google maps said. Nearest restaurant not a long ways down from the apartment. Google maps has never betrayed her before, so she has nothing to fear.

She hopes.

Laura continued her walk along the street, staring up at the names on top of the stores that passed by. Joe's Diner- here it is. Laura smiled and looked back to the street. She was about to continue to walk in, when a certain brunette caught her eye a few stores down. Laura squinted hard, recognizing the figure.  _Who is that? I think I know them..._  Her eyes darted from the brunette to the store, two alternatives tugging at her. Laura wanted to go inside the shop and forget about it, but there was something about the girl that pulled her, intrigued her.

Laura found herself slowly walking to the brunette. Her posture- theres something about her posture that she knows. Those waves in her hair- why does she feel like she needs to touch them? The girl was writing something down on a chalkboard sign, but Laura wasn't paying much attention to that. It was all focused on the girl writing the words. She knows the way she hold the chalk in her hands. Where does she know her? How does she know her? Questions spun around in her mind as she got closer.

She stopped when she was a few feet away, observing the raven-haired girl. The girl paid Laura no mind as she continued to trace words on the chalk board. That hand writing- she knows it. How? This girl, she knows her. Laura knows those slight curls to the black hair, she knows the legs those leather pants hug so tightly. She knows those pale, slender fingertips. She knows the way she writes with her left hand, the way she dots her i's. She knows those cheekbones from somewhere. She knows the chipped black nail polish and combat boots. Where does she know this girl? It feels like theres an itch on her brain and the only way to satisfy it was to know. It only intrigued her more that she couldn't figure it out. She knows this girl...

Where does she know her from?

"Look." That voice. She knows that voice. The cool, raspy voice with a slight tint of anger. Who does it belong to? Laura searched for the answers inside of her mind, desperately pulling memories. The brunette... "I'm sorry if I didn't call you back but-" _That's it!_

"Carm?" Laura finally pieced the puzzle together. The brunette slowly turned her head and straightened up. Only one person's eyes could ever be so dark, voice so angry, posture so perfect and hands so gentle;

_Carmilla._

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla hated writing in chalk. There was something about the feeling of the dry chalk in her hand and the way it hit the chalkboard that was off putting. But hey, a job's a job. 

She was in the middle of writing "Monday: Science Fiction 10% off" when out of the corner of her eye she saw a figure stop and stare at her. Carmilla sighed.

Carmilla got stared at all the time, so it was nothing new. People would stop, give them her number, ask her out, or even be so bold as to say some cheesy line like "I've got to have you" or something about her being too beautiful. Carmilla was used to it. It was just a matter of time before the stranger next to her worked up the nerve to say something. Sometimes if Carmilla would be in the right mood, she would return the flirting with a cute girl and hook up. She hooked up a lot, everywhere and anywhere really. 

Carmilla chose to ignore the stranger and continue to write. But as the seconds continued, she couldn't help but feel eery. _Oh, crap._ Carmilla thought. _What if it's a random hook up? Or a girl I forgot to call back?_ Carmilla sighed heavily. _Yeah- I'm going to have to deal with that._ Carmilla placed the chalk down on the board.

"Look." Carmilla said, dusting off chalk from her hand. "I'm sorry if I didn't call you back but-"

"Carm?" The stranger interrupted. _Carm?_ There were only two people to ever call her Carm; her sister and someone else she can't exactly remember, someone deep in her past. There was something in the way she said it that made Carmilla's heart skip a beat.

Curiosity got the best of Carmilla, and she slowly lifted her gaze to meet warm brown eyes. 

 _Wait, I know this girl._ Carmilla thought, straightening out her back. She knows this girl. She's definitely Carmilla's type, but she can't be a random hook up. She can't be a random hook up, her heart is beating too fast. Why is her heart beating like that? And why can't she look away from those warm brown eyes? Carmilla eyed the girl up and down. How does she know this girl? She knows those slight waves to the caramel colored hair, the glow of her skin, the tiny frame. She knew those strong hands, that sunshine aura. She knew the confused look and furrowed eyebrows. How the hell does she know this girl? From her dreams? She's definitely some sort of angel- is she dying? If Carmilla knew someone this gorgeous, she'd definitely remember them. And-

"Hey L. We looked for you in the diner but-" A ginger approached from behind her, but stopped midway. L- L... Her mind started spinning, memories on the verge of pouring through her mind. L... Carmilla thought about it, thought about it hard. Who did she know who's name began with L... That's when it hit Carmilla. _Thats it!_

_Laura._

"Whoa, Carmilla?" Carmilla recognized the ginger to be her old friend, Lafontaine. Memories started pouring through her mind like water through a crack in a dam. They came faster before she could even come close to recognizing the memories, before she could even think to stop them. 

Laura in their spot, Laura holding Carmilla while she cried, Laura offering to be her friend when no one else did. Laura, who showed her kindness and acceptance when everyone turned their back to her. Eating cookies on Laura's bed, staying up late at night to talk over the phone, sleeping over Laura's home. That sleepover where Laura kissed her. Kissing Laura in that one last time in front of the fireworks. Laura, who was Carmilla's home.

_Home._

Before Carmilla could even think to stop herself she wrapped her arms around the tiny girl. Laura wrapped her arms around Carmilla's neck, and suddenly the world felt in place again. Carmilla's head was spinning with a thousand memories. Laura still had the same smell after all these years, the same bone crushing hug that Carmilla always pretended to hate. She had the same warm brown eyes, the same patient look that tore Carmilla's walls down. Carmilla clenched her shirt in some weird fear of losing her again. They shifted their weight from side to side, holding each other tightly in one joyous reunion. It wasn't until Lafontaine coughed that Carmilla remembered she and Laura weren't the only ones there.

"Oh my god!" Was all Carmilla could get out as she pulled away. She felt like a teen again, her smile wide, her heart racing, that excited bubble forming in her stomach. Her walls came crashing down. The defenses she worked so long and hard to build crumbled with one brief hug and two warm brown eyes. "What are you- how are you- what?"

"Why Lafontaine, it's great to see you too!" Carmilla looked to Lafontaine and ran up and hugged them for a brief moment, accidentally knocking them over a bit. They got their footing and laughed.

"Holy shit!" Carmilla exclaimed. _Get ahold of yourself, Karnstein!_ A voice shouted in Carmilla's head, scared at the sudden burst of emotion from herself. "You guys... My God! What are you doing here?" She looked back to Laura, who wore the same disbelief as Carmilla.

"What are we doing here? What are you doing here?" Laura questioned back. The girls shared another hug, when they pulled away, holding each other's arms, Carmilla took the time to get a good look at Laura.

Her hair had grown; no longer being shoulder length. It was still had that caramel color Carmilla had always known. Laura had also grew a few inches, though she was still quite small. Her skin seemed more tan, and was possibly glowing. She didn't have crooked teeth anymore- instead a perfect row of pearly white teeth. Laura's eyes were still the same color, still big, wide and full of hope. She looked beautiful. Carmilla smiled.

_It feels like home again._

 

**Laura**

 

As she pulled back from Carmilla, she took the opportunity to really look at her.

Carmilla's fringe was gone; instead her hair was parted in the middle. It was a bit curlier than when she last saw her, but still as luscious as she remembered. Her dark, narrow brown eyes still remained the same, though she no longer had those dark bags underneath them. Carmilla was still pale as ever, but she looked healthier, happier almost. She had grown, and wasn't the same height as Laura as they were in childhood. Instead, she held an inch or two over Laura. Her jawline was more pronounced, and my god was she beautiful. She could stare at her forever- and she was ready to when Lafontaine ruined the moment.

"So we were about to grab some lunch at Joe's down the street. You want to join?" Lafontaine offered, sharing the same enthusiastic smile as the two. Laura refrained a sigh. _Make room for Laf._ Laura looked up to Carmilla with hopeful eyes. She wanted to talk to Carmilla again, ask her about her life, find out what she's like now; she really just wanted to stay around her. Carmilla sighed.

"I wish, but I gotta work." Laura let disappointment weigh on her shoulders, and she was pretty sure she was pouting. Carmilla looked down to Laura, and something behind those eyes softened. "But what about after?" Laura brightened up again.

"Sure! We have an apartment not too far from here. You can swing by. Actually, Perry lives with us as well." Carmilla smiled.

"Oh no way! Perry? I have an apartment nearby too- that's incredible." Laf chuckled.

"Yeah, we have a lot to catch up on." They replied. "You're never gonna believe who also lives here."

"Who?"

"Kirsch and Danny."

"Get out! Are you serious?" They nodded, and suddenly a tall guy with black hair peeped his head out of the shop.

"Uh, Carmilla? You gonna wrap this up?" He asked in a deep voice with some sort of accent. Carmilla look to him for a brief moment and nodded. He sighed and walked back into the store. Carmilla turned to Laura.

"I have to go back to work though. Where do you guys live? I'll make sure to stop by after." 

"Actually." Laura said, an idea sparking inside her head, as well as an excuse to talk to Carmilla alone. "I could come down here when you're done with work and walk you down. You know, if you want to." Carmilla looked to Laura, causing her heart to feel like it might actually beat it's way out of her chest. She smirked, and Laura didn't realize until then how much she actually missed it. She still had that same snarky know-it-all smirk. Though it was more developed, like she had been training herself to make it more smug throughout the years.

"I think I'd like that very much." Laura smiled, and unwillingly pulled herself away from Carmilla. "I get out around 6." Laura nodded.

"6 it is then. Well, it was nice seeing you." Carmilla bit her lip for a moment.

"It was nice seeing you too, Laura." Even when they were friends Carmilla hardly said her name, and it still warmed her inside when her name rolled off of Carmilla's tongue. Lafontaine grabbed Laura's arm.

"Come on, let Carmilla do her job." Lafontaine teased.

"Just..." Laura shook out of Lafontaine's grip ran into Carmilla's arms again, still feeling a burst of emotions. They shared another tight hug. It felt like she was at home again, like she was somehow safer. _I don't ever want to let go._

"Laura! Let the poor girl do her job." Lafontaine said, grabbing Laura's arm. They waved to Carmilla as they started to drag Laura away.

"I'll see you tonight!" Laura called out.

"Yeah! See ya!" Carmilla called back.

"I hope you have a good day! And that your job does well! You'll have to tell me all about this!" Laura saw Carmilla laughing as she started to get farther and farther away. "Make sure you don't forget! Not that you would! I'd probably forget! Not that I will!"

"Go before Lafontaine literally murders you!" Carmilla called, cupping her hands to her mouth. Laura waved, and wanted to shout back but Lafontaine grumbled something about Laura's rambling, and Laura decided to give it arrest. She hasn't rambled like that since she was a kid... Maybe Carmilla's bringing that back out.

Laura got dragged into the diner and out of sight from Carmilla. She was going to have to let Lafontaine explain this to Perry, because Laura might speak 100 words per second from pure excitement.

 

**Carmilla**

 

At around 5:30, Carmilla booked it to her apartment. She lied to Laura about the time she got out so she could have some time to prepare. She had to tell someone- anyone. Right now, her victim was going to be JP. Plus, he could always give her advice.

God, what's wrong with her tonight? She's acting like a teenager again. Rushing to tell her friends details, looking for advice, having a stupid smile on her face. She never put this much effort into anything- well besides work. But that was only for money, which she needs. Like how she needs to impress Laura tonight. 

No, no. How she needs to impress Lafontaine, Perry and Laura... But mainly Laura.

No, no. She's not doing that. Well, maybe a little. But that's only because Laura was her best friend growing up, and happened to kiss her the last time she saw her. They were kids though- Laura's probably straight anyway. And she stopped being hung up over that girl a long time ago. She's simply going to an old friend's apartment accompanied by two other friends that she knew growing up.

How did they even end up here anyway? All of them in the same place? It's like she's dreaming. Carmilla can't believe how after all this time, out of all places, out of all different which ways they end up together again.

 _What is she like now? What's changed about her? Laura still has that broad smile, those warm, big brown eyes, that caramel-colored hair, and she's still tiny. Is her personality still the same? Is she dating anyone? How did she end up here? My god the unknown is going to drive me to the brink of insanity!_  Carmilla thought to herself.

She eventually arrived at her apartment, fumbling with her keys before breaking through the door. She was greeted by her small black cat Mircalla. Carmilla smiled.

"You know I love you, but I have more important things to focus on." Carmilla said, patting her cat's head. "JP! I HAVE FUCKING NEWS!" She shouted, sprinting up the stairs. 

"LET A GUY LIVE!" He called back.

"NOT TODAY!" She shouted, quickly rushing through the living room. Carmilla bursted into his bedroom. He had a splay of textbooks and papers, his laptop sitting next to him as he multitasked between an essay and research, as well as- is that a bowl of cereal? How does this guy manage to do it all...

"What's so important?" He asked, closing the lid to his laptop. She shook off the thought, and took a deep breath.

"I have quite the tale for you, JP. Buckle up creampuff. We're going to be in for a long night."

Carmilla told JP the story of her and Laura from the beginning. From when they became friends, to that last night under the fireworks. She went on a fews stories from childhood, like that time they kissed at the sleepover, or when Laura put on a puppet show to make Carmilla feel better. Carmilla included stories alongside with the ginger squad and Kirsch, just to add backstory. She finished off by stating the final interaction with Laura near her shop.

"So, now I'm here. With," she looked to an old clock hanging on JP's wall, "15 minutes until she comes to the bookstore and picks me up. Oh god. JP, I need your help. I don't know what I'm to do, or what I'm to say. Look, you know I'm not so good with the whole... Feelings thing, and I'm scared I might fuck up. Just, help me." JP cocked an eyebrow.

"Well for starters, I've never seen you this jittery about anything- ever. So it's apparent you still care for this girl." Carmilla rolled her eyes.

"Can we save the whole connecting-with-my-emotions gig for later? I think I might be freaking out- and that never happens." JP sighed and pondered over the thought for a moment.

"I don't think sitting here and obsessing over it will help. If you just simply do and live in the moment, I think it won't be as big of a deal. Just clear your head, and don't over think it." 

"It's not that easy." Carmilla snapped back, irritated at his nonchalant attitude.

"Nothing's easy with you." JP teased. Carmilla rolled her eyes "Come on. You're Carmilla Karnstein. The great lady killer. A childhood friend can't stop you." Carmilla smirked slightly.

"That's right. I'm Carmilla fucking Karnstein." JP held his fist in the air.

"Hell yeah!"

"And I can do this."

"Damn straight!" 

"Damn gay!"

"That too!" They shared a few cheers, and he looked to the clock. "You should probably go now. If you need anything text me." Carmilla nodded and headed out the room as JP reopened his laptop. "And Carmilla?" He said as she was halfway out the doorway.

"Yeah?" She replied.

"Try not to be so much of a grump." JP said, not bothering to look up from his screen. Carmilla huffed.

"No promises." Carmilla shut the door and fed the black cat before jolting down the stairs and out onto the street. It was darker now, the sun no longer visible. The streets had a few people here and there walking around, the lights from inside stores illuminating the area. Carmilla pulled out her phone and checked the time.

 **5:42PM**.

She can get there in time, but what if Laura got there before her? Oh no. Carmilla started speeding down the not-so busy streets. One good thing about being small was how easy it was for her to shove past people without them noticing. God damn it, why do so many people have to be in her way? _Just go back to your homes, you imbeciles._ She thought to herself.

Carmilla finally made it to the library in record time.

 **5:51PM**.

Carmilla took a deep breath and sat on a nearby bench, leaning against the back of it. Carmilla rested her elbows on the back of the bench and threw her head back, staring up at the darkening sky. _God, I'm being a nostalgic idiot tonight._

But there's something about her.

There always has been something about Laura, even when they were children. There was something about her that changed Carmilla, whether for good or bad Carmilla didn't know. Laura's face flashed in Carmilla's mind, changing from when she was younger to now. Now... She was so beautiful and grown up. Did she think Carmilla looked beautiful? _Well, of course... Or maybe not._ Carmilla almost gasped at that thought. She's never doubted her looks before, nor ever cared if someone recognized her looks or not. _God damn it Karnstein. Get it together._ Carmilla cursed herself in her head. This is stupid. She should just go back to her apartment. Why is she even trying so hard? Why is she so worried of what this girl thought? She's simply a childhood friend. She's just a girl. She's just-

"Carmilla?" Carmilla turned around and saw Laura. She's just adorable. Laura had on a brown jacket far too big for her, four large buttons on the front, closing the jacket. She wore tight blue jeans and brown flats, and a scarf that covered up to the tip of her nose. Carmilla felt an irrepressible smile spread widely across her cheeks upon seeing the tiny girl. _What is that all about?_

"Hey!" Carmilla greeted with too much enthusiasm for her liking. Carmilla felt drawn to the girl, like she needed to hug her again, hold her hand- something. But Carmilla restrained herself by shoving her hands in her leather pants pockets.

"Ready to go?" Laura said, pulling down her scarf to reveal a smile slowly spreading on her expression. Carmilla bit her lip and nodded. They started walking side by side down the nearly empty streets, a few lampposts here and there lighting the way. Carmilla felt so drawn to Laura; like she needed to be in constant contact with her. She wanted to hug her, or maybe kiss her, or hold her hand- Carmilla was experiencing a lot right now. _Get your emotions in check._ Carmilla said to herself in her head. She fought down the excitement bubbling in her stomach and cleared her throat. Childhood friend- nothing more.

"So how've you been?" Carmilla asked a little less enthusiastically this time. 

"Really? 8 years of not seeing each other and that's how you open up?" Laura teased, nudging Carmilla with her elbow. Suddenly, she felt self-conscious. _Way to go, Karnstein. Not even 5 seconds of seeing her again and you've already screwed up._ Carmilla shook her head. _Wait- cool and disaffected. Don't care if she cares. Not even in the slightest. Just a childhood friend. A really pretty... Likable... Gorgeous childhood friend. Who is probably straight and wants to get this out of the way- stop caring so much._

"What else is there to say?" Carmilla replied with a shrug. _Smooth._

"Ah. Still cold and distant. Nothings changed then, huh?" Carmilla looked down to Laura, and boy was that a mistake because she was beaming up at Carmilla, and now she wasn't able to tear her eyes off of her.

"You're still trying to play Lauronica Mars?" Laura bit her lip and looked to the ground, taking a strand of her hair behind her ear. Carmilla wanted nothing more than to stroke her caramel-colored hair. Wait, yes she did; her dignity.

"I'm actually majoring in journalism." Carmilla couldn't help but chuckle.

"So I guess nothing has changed then." Carmilla retaliated, nudging Laura with her elbow. "Where do you go to school?" 

"Silas University." Carmilla stopped in her tracks, and Laura was soon to follow. Carmilla eyed Laura for a moment. "You alright?" Carmilla blinked a few times. What does she say? Her sister owns that school, JP goes to that school... How does she explain her situation without going into her past? She can't have these two realities collide. She can't let that happen. 

"Yeah, just thought I saw something." Carmilla and Laura continued to walk side by side, gravitating back towards each other. "My roommate, he goes there." Laura was the one to stop this time.

 

**Laura**

 

"My roommate, he goes there." Laura stopped dead in her tracks. _Roommate? He?_ Laura felt a small part of her soul be crushed. _So... She is straight. Wonderful. Well, at least I can stop myself from falling for another straight girl then- if I even am falling for her._ Laura shook her head to herself. _No no, I'm not. My heart is only racing from the exercise, the butterflies in my stomach are just digestion problems, and my shortness of breath every time Carmilla smirks is because... I'll think of an excuse later._

"Cupcake, if we keep stopping we're never going to get to your apartment." Carmilla said, turning on her heel and facing Laura. Laura put on her best smile and nodded. Well, might as well get it out of the way.

"Right." They continued to walk down the street in a few moments of silence. Laura cleared her throat. "So he's your... Boyfriend then?" Laura inquired. Carmilla bursted into an uproar of laughter loud enough to echo throughout the streets.

"Oh god! Oh no, no. Dating JP? Could you imagine? Me, dating JP?" For some reason, Laura felt relieved. Although she was confused at the sudden outburst of laughter, it sounded like a sweet melody as well. She has a nice laugh is all- that's it. Laura waited for her laughter to calm down a bit before speaking again.

"So... That's a no then?" Laura said, trying to hide her hope. Carmilla shook her head and wiped a tear away from her eye.

"No.. No cupcake. I've slept with more women than he has." Laura inhaled sharply. _Did she just say? Does that mean she's...?_

"So... You turned out gay too?" Laura said. Carmilla turned her head and looked down at Laura with a brief shocked expression. She still looks adorable when she's confused. But the moment was short lived when she smiled.

"Wait, you're gay?" Laura nodded, and Carmilla chuckled. Carmilla looked to the barren streets ahead, and Laura couldn't help but feel excitement bubbling in her stomach. Carmilla smiled and shook her head to herself. "Huh. It really is a small world." 

After about 10 more minutes of talking, Laura arrived at her apartment complex. Somewhere along the way, the girl's had gravitated towards each other, walking side by side so their shoulders were pressed together, but Laura couldn't help but feel drawn to her, to be drawn to her. It's not her fault the broody gay attracts Laura; no, not attract. Intrigues. Definitely _not_ attracted to childhood friends with sharp jawlines and fantastically worn leather pants. 

_At all._

Laura had explained how Danny and Kirsch attended at Silas University as well, and have been together since Junior year. She went on briefly about Perry and Lafontaine as well, explaining how they've been together since Freshman year of high school. Carmilla talked about her job, and a little bit of her roommate. She avoided topics like how she ended up at Styria, or really anything pertaining to her personal life. The journalist in Laura wanted to press for information, but she knew better enough to leave it alone. Laura talked about her dad, and how he worked as an EMT back in their home town. They talked briefly about their personal lives in the 10 minutes that they had, and with each passing word Laura was more intrigued by Carmilla. She wanted to spend more time with her; figure out her aspirations, why she works at a library, how she ended up living with JP, if her favorite color was still black- basically all she could know about Carmilla.

Carmilla held the door open for her as they made it past the lobby and to the elevator. Laura punched in her floor on the display of buttons and they stood there for a few moments in silence, the only sound being the hum of the elevator. Laura stared up at the ceiling, her reflection bouncing back at her. She saw Carmilla staring at her, and looked to Carmilla. Carmilla looked down to her feet like she wasn't looking, and Laura smiled. But as the elevator dinged she remembered that Carmilla was there to see Lafontaine and Perry again as well. 

"Are you ready to see them?" Laura asked as Carmilla gestured her to walk out. Carmilla was soon to follow. She shrugged and shoved her hands into her hoodie's pocket.

"I'm excited to see the ginger twins I'll give them that." Laura smiled and rolled her eyes.

"Right. Cool and disaffected."

"That's the name of the game, cutie." Laura blushed at the nickname, the butterflies in her stomach causing her to fumble with her keys. It's not everyday that hot girls call Laura cute- well, at least ones she cares about anyway. Laura finally fitted her key into the door, and turned the lock. They were greeted by the smell of brownies and a hyper Perry, standing there and smiling widely.

"Carmilla!" Perry squeaked, pulling her into a hug so tight it could kill a man.

"Whoa there ginger 2!" Carmilla teased, wrapping her arms around Perry. Lafontaine rushed into the kitchen.

"Hey! Laura didn't get too lost I hope." They teased. Carmilla laughed and hugged them after. Laura shut the door.

"I can be a functioning adult sometimes." Laura huffed, crossing her arms.

"Tell that to the excessive amounts of cookies and extremely dorky Dr. Who mug." Lafontaine retaliated, raising their eyebrows with their trademark shit-eating grin.

"So that cookie monster trait still a thing, huh?" Carmilla asked. Laura rolled her eyes and kicked off her shoes, tossing her jacket on the nearby couch. 

"I'd say it's more of an addiction than a 'trait'." Laf replied, nudging Carmilla with their elbow. 

"It takes us 8 years to be reunited, and all we can do is make fun of Laura." Laura said. Carmilla turned to Laura and chuckled.

"That bunched up face you make when you're angry is hilarious, buttercup." Laura rolled her eyes again and took off her scarf, adding it to the coat on the couch.

"Alright, enough of cookie eaters anonymous. We have so much to catch up on!" Perry exclaimed. 

The four pulled out a couple of beers and talked about their life whilst eating Perry's godly brownies. Carmilla didn't share much of her life; only that she's gay, loves books, and lives in an apartment with JP. Lafontaine went on about what a genius JP was- apparently they both work in the same lab, and are friends. Perry told Carmilla about her jobs, and eventually went into the story of how Lafontaine and she ended up together. Laura talked about her life a bit; going into how she's still chasing journalism, and how she feels about starting University. Now, Lafontaine was beatboxing while Perry free-style rapped. Really, it was the most hilarious thing Laura has ever seen. Perry always goes into some rapping bit every time she gets drunk, and each time gets funnier than the last. 

Laura was doubled over on the floor, clutching her sides as she tried to calm down her laughter. Tears were building up in her eyes and her stomach hurt from the laughter. Carmilla helped a somewhat intoxicated Laura back up on the couch. 

Lafontaine and Perry had taken the chair; doing their best to fit in it. Perry had one leg on Lafontaine while the other remained on the couch. Carmilla and Laura were on the couch. At first, it was a bit awkward, since there wasn't much room to keep distance between each other. But a couple beers later and a lot of opening up, Laura's head was in Carmilla's lap, Carmilla gently running her fingers through Laura's hair. She was surprised at how right this all felt; like a major piece to her puzzle had just been filled, but not yet completed.

"And that, ladies, was amazing cook, all around Den Mother, and lyrical genius P-Dawg." Lafontaine said, gesturing to their girlfriend on their lap. Laura laughed again.

"Incredible. Truly a star in the making." Carmilla replied sarcastically.

"It's nothing compared to little miss librarian." Perry pointed to Carmilla. 

"Yeah. That store seemed quite impressive. You run it yourself?" Laf added.

"No. I work it with a kid named Theo. You saw him, remember?" Carmilla caressed Laura's cheek for a moment, and stared down at her. Laura looked back up with pure adoration.

"Oh yeah! What accent was that?"

"South African. He's a total sweetheart." Carmilla brushed some hair out of Laura's face, and Laura's heart started to pound. Carmilla reach up and stroked a strand of Carmilla's hair, letting it slide between her fingers before resting it back down on the couch. "Plus, he kicks all of the, um, unwanted attention." Carmilla said, breaking their eye contact and looking back to Lafontaine. At least now my heart gets to rest.

"Unwanted attention?" Perry replied, cocking an eyebrow. Carmilla shook her head.

"Oh yeah. Creepy guys with librarian fantasies, heartbroken hook ups I've had, poets professing my beauty. He's a big help." Laura felt a small ball of jealousy start stirring inside of her. People do what? To her? No no, that does NOT fly with Laura.

"My dad sent me day-of-the-week bear spray. I could kick 'em out." Carmilla smirked and looked back down to Laura, running her fingers through her hair again. 

"Why? Are you jealous cupcake?" _Shit. Defenses have fallen. Abort! Abort!_

"No." Laura replied all to quickly. 

"Right, right." Carmilla said with a wink. _Can my heart ever get a break?_  "Hey what time is it?" Carmilla asked suddenly. Lafontaine pulled out their phone.

"It is... Wow. It's 11 o'clock." Lafontaine retaliated, sliding their phone back in their pocket. Carmilla groaned.

"I should probably be getting back." Laura grabbed Carmilla's arm, too intoxicated (she's quite the lightweight) to really think about she was doing. 

"Don't go." Laura muttered. Carmilla started running her hand through Laura's hair.

"I have to. It's getting late." She replied, and Laura closed her eyes, taking in the feeling of her fingers massaging her scalp. _Wow, Carmilla is really good at this. Has she always been good at this? I wonder if she's good with her hands..._ Laura shook the though off. _No! We are NOT doing that!_ Laura patronized to herself. Okay- she has to think of a plan before Carmilla leaves. Laura really doesn't want her to leave, she found. 

"Yeah, but..." Laura picked her head out of Carmilla's lap, staring up into her deep, dark, pretty brown eyes that Laura feels she could drown herself in. Carmilla's hand stayed tangled in Laura's hair, causing her heart to race. "You're drunk. You can't walk the streets alone at night being drunk! It's dangerous, you know. That's how people get murdered, or worse. You know?" Laura looked to the others, silently pleading for help. Lafontaine had their know-it-all grin and crossed their arms.

"I have to agree with Laura on this one." Lafontaine said. Perry fidgeted with her hands.

"Well, she does have a point..." Perry added. _Yes, YES. Even mama goose thinks she should stay- I have this in the bag. Where did that phrase even come from anyway? Not the point, Laura._

"Yeah. You can crash here. I'm sure you can stay in Laura's room." Lafontaine said, throwing a wink to Laura. Laura looked back to Carmilla, who sighed and shrugged.

"I mean since y'all are so worried about my safety..." Laura squealed out of excitement.

"Great!" Carmilla smiled at Laura, and oh my if she keeps looking at Laura like that Laura fears she might just die. 

"Well, I'm exhausted." Perry announced, rising out of the seat she shared with Lafontaine. "Sweetie." She said, extending her hand. Lafontaine took it, and gave Laura a nod.

_Here goes nothing._

 

**Carmilla**

 

"We're gonna go to bed. Don't stay up too late, kids." They teased. Whoa, what? When did things get so fast? Spending the night with Laura? They're leaving us alone on this bacchanalian night... Laura rolled her eyes and Carmilla huffed.

"Night, George and Fred Weasley." Carmilla replied, giving each ginger a nod. They waved them off, and Perry gave Lafontaine a quick look before they scurried off to their bedroom. Carmilla's heart started to pound. Why was it racing like that? She looked to a drunken Laura, and realized her hand was still in her hair. Carmilla hastily pulled it out. _Alone, with Laura..._ Carmilla shook the thought off. _Just a childhood friend. Who's also really pretty and... Fuck it._ Carmilla, feeling bold from the poison in her system, made her famous seduction eyes at Laura.

"Are we going to bed too, creampuff?" Carmilla asked in a low voice, watching as the girl squirmed slightly to confirm her victory.

"Yep!" The tiny girl squeaked, hopping off the couch. Carmilla smirked and reluctantly pulled herself off the couch. _Well, might as well use some of my moves to make things more interesting._ Carmilla thought as Laura led her to the bedroom. There were still boxes scattered throughout the room, but it still had that cozy feeling that Laura's place always had. 

"I see you still have that yellow pillow." Carmilla said, spotting the familiar yellow fluff. Laura shut the door behind her and huffed out a laugh.

"Oh, yeah. Couldn't find the heart to get rid of that thing." Laura replied, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. There was something more to it, but Carmilla was too lazy (and drunk) to press on. Plus, she's alone in Laura's room. She's going to have to stop herself from giving her famous seduction eyes to prevent the thoughts she was having, though it was worth it to watch the cutie squirm...

_Here goes nothing._

 

**Laura**

 

 _MY GOD CARMILLA KARNSTEIN IS ALONE IN MY ROOM AND IS LOOKING AT ME IN A WAY THAT MAKES ME WANT TO DO SINFUL THINGS!_ Laura screamed in her head, feeling as though she might burst out of excitement.

"Anyway, I have a set of pajamas in that dresser over there if you'd like to wear pajamas." Laura went to her dresser and started rummaging through her clothes. "I don't have much right now, seeing as I just moved and all." Laura picked out her olive green tank top and flannel pajama pants. "But you can still pick out whatever you want. I know it can't be comfortable to-" Laura's words died in her throat when she looked to Carmilla. Carmilla stood there in a black lace bra and boy shorts. Laura's jaw nearly hit the floor as she eyed Carmilla up and down. This is NOT helping with wanting-to-do-sinful-things part... Carmilla held up her hand.

"I'm fine, cupcake. I usually sleep naked anyway. This is as close to naked as I can get." Carmilla said, brushing her hand on Laura's shoulder as she passed her, plopping down on the edge of her bed. _Okay, and definitely not going to picture Carmilla naked._ Laura stood there for a moment, not being able to take her eyes off of the darker haired girl sitting on her bed. Carmilla still had her beautiful pale skin. It looked so soft, and Laura wondered if it was smooth. She had to bite her lip to prevent herself from talking; especially with how loose she was feeling from the alcohol."Like what you see, cutie?" Laura blinked a few times and shook her head. Not the time for that.

"I'm going to get changed in the bathroom." Laura squealed before staggering into her bathroom, shutting the door behind her. Laura realized how hard her heart was beating. _Oh no. I'm turned on, aren't I? Great_. Laura hurried to change into her pajamas, knowing that Carmilla was just outside the door. Wait... Would Carmilla have to... Oh no- Carmilla's going to have to sleep in her bed with her. _Great. I'm really turned on now..._   _Just great._

Laura exited to see Carmilla still seated on the side of Laura's bed, her elbows resting on her knees as her arms draped over them. She lifted her head and smiled upon seeing Laura. 

"Uh... So you're sleeping in my bed, right?" Laura asked, playing with her fingers. 

"Unless you want me sleeping on the floor." 

"No!" _Whoa there. Down girl._ "I mean, no. What kind of host would I be if I made my guest sleep on the floor?" Was that a nice catch? Good enough. Carmilla smirked, and Laura stood there awkwardly for a moment. Thank god the alcohol had already flushed her cheeks, because seeing Carmilla like this was enough to turn her into a tomato. Laura finally got her legs to move and she sat next to Carmilla on her bed, the heels of Laura's palms digging into her knees. What next? Carmilla sighed and moved into the bed, sliding under the covers and leaning her back against the wall. Carmilla patted the space next to her.

"Care to join me, creampuff?" Carmilla said, her lips quirking into a smirk. Something darkened in her eyes, only intriguing Laura farther. Feeling bold, Laura moved into the space next to Carmilla, letting her drape the sheets over them. Laura turned her back to Carmilla, wondering how she's ever going to fall asleep with her heart pounding fast and mind racing. Maybe she can just make casual conversation. Laura turned and looked to Carmilla, who was already staring deeply at her. Carmilla rested her head on her hand, and Laura realized how close they were, both of them using the same pillow. 

"Why do you always call me edible things?" Laura asked. Carmilla chuckled darkly.

"Maybe it's because I want to eat you." Carmilla teased, making a biting gesture. Laura's breath caught in her throat. She swallowed nervously as though it would help her pounding heart. _Does this place have a heater? Because suddenly it's really hot._ She'll try and remember to check into that.

"Oh." Laura managed to get out. The atmosphere around them turned tense, and with each passing second Laura looked in Carmilla's dark eyes, it seemed to only increase. "That's nice." Carmilla bit her lip and darkly chuckled again. She took a strand of Laura's hair and stroked it.

"I think it's time to get some rest now, cupcake." Carmilla whispered. Laura nodded. Sleep- that's what she came in here to do. That's what Laura came in here to do. 

"Right." Laura said, once more turning around. She almost gasped when she felt Carmilla start tucking her hair to the nape of her neck. Laura eased into her leisurely touch, her hand gently moving the strands of caramel-colored hair.

"Remember all those sleepovers we had as kids?" Carmilla murmured, slowly clearing Laura's hair to behind her neck. Laura grinned and giggled.

"Yeah, those were the times." Laura replied, closing her eyes to take in the feeling of Carmilla's gingerly movements. "Remember when we tried to sneak out, but my dad caught us when we were halfway out the window?" Laura said, reminiscing in the memories. Carmilla snickered softly.

"Oh yeah. Then there was that time I convinced you that aliens lived under your bed, and you refused to sleep in it." Carmilla retaliated. Laura chuckled at the memory. 

"I swear you scarred me for life." 

"You're in a bed now no problem, right?" Laura rolled her eyes.

"Maybe it's because you're here." Laura said boldly. Carmilla snickered, and suddenly Laura felt her cool lips press against her shoulder. 

"You know, I never thought I'd see you again." Carmilla muttered, her voice trailing. Her slender wrapped around Laura's waist, holding her tightly. Laura smiled, feeling blissful. She worried Carmilla might feel how hard her heart was pounding right now, but then again she didn't care. She was just glad Carmilla was holding her. 

"I'm here now." Laura replied in a murmur. She felt Carmilla smile against her shoulder.

"Yeah... Yeah you are." Laura laced her hand with the one around her waist.

"And I'm not going anywhere." She reminded her.

"Promise?" Laura smiled, and gave Carmilla's hand a squeeze.

"Promise." Laura and Carmilla fell asleep that way, holding each other, feeling safe, secure. Laura wondered how she could get so lucky as to end up with Carmilla again, how lucky she was to have her back in her life, how lucky to have Carmilla hold her again. Laura sighed with content.

She was to be home again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the highly anticipated Chapter has finally come!  
> Thank you for all of the comments and kudos!


	12. Another Reason To Hate Cops

**Lafontaine**

 

They woke up entangled with Perry in their bed. They groaned at the blaring alarm clock that sounded only a few moments later. Why do they even bother with an alarm clock when they're just going to wake up before it sets off anyway?

They sighed, and smiled down at their sleeping girlfriend. She always looked so peaceful when she slept, no scowl or pout like she usually wore. They kissed her forehead and turned off the alarm clock. They stretched and walked out into the kitchen to prepare breakfast, when they spotted the empty beer bottles and empty plates where brownies once were. They grinned mischievously.

_I wonder how it went down between Carmilla and Laura..._

For science, they quietly creeped up to Laura's room.  _Sneaky- be sneaky Lafontaine._  They thought to themselves as they gently wrapped their hand around the door knob. Carefully, they slowly creaked open the door and peeked inside. Their jaw dropped upon the sight.

Carmilla was shirtless, and pantless for that matter. Laura's head was tucked tightly into Carmilla's neck, her arms wrapped tightly around the raven-haired girls waist, their legs entangled. Carmilla had one arm wrapped around Laura's shoulders and the other hugging her head like her life depended on it. They were expecting something sexual, or embarrassing even- something to hold over Laura as blackmail and possibly tease her over. But this was... Innocent, and serine. They looked so at peace in each other's arms, it was cute even. Blackmail was NOT supposed to be cute. They sighed.

_God damn it. All I wanted was blackmail- not have my heart warmed._

"Sweetie what are you-" Lafontaine jumped at the sound and was quick to react.

"Sh!" Lafontaine shushed, bringing a finger to her lips. Perry nodded, and Lafontaine slowly retracted their hand. They pointed inside, and Perry peeked her head in. Perry's jaw dropped as well, and then she immediately shut the door.

"Lafontaine! You can't just go around, peeping into other girl's rooms!" Perry chastised in a harsh whisper. "You're going to grow a reputation!" They shrugged.

"What? I was doing it for... Science." Perry cocked an eyebrow and crossed her arms in disbelief. "Come on, you have to admit it's kinda cute." Perry sighed, and a small smile danced on her lips.

"Yeah... It was kinda adorable. I mean- despite the absence of Carmilla's pants and all." Lafontaine smiled, and caressed Perry's cheek.

"See? So it was worth it." She rolled her eyes, but still that small smile still playing on her lips. 

"Remember when we were like that?" Perry said, leaning into their touch. Lafontaine chuckled softly.

"Oh yeah. You used to be a stage 5 clinger in bed." 

"Hey! You were the one that always hogged up all the covers. I had to be close to you if I wanted to stay warm." They shared a brief moment of laughter before the door flung open. They both jumped and turned to see a very angry, and broody, Carmilla glaring at them. Lafontaine tried their best to avert their eyes from the lack of clothing.

"Do you need something, ginger twins?" Carmilla hissed harshly. Lafontaine and Perry exchanged a glance. Oh right; Carmilla was never a morning person. Lafontaine shook their head. They were about to apologize, when they heard a small yawn coming from the room.

"Carm?" They heard a soft voice call. Lafontaine saw Carmilla's hardened exterior immediately soften at the sound of Laura's voice. Their shit-eating grin returned to their cheeks and they crossed their arms. 

"I think your wide-eyed maiden fair is calling for you." Lafontaine said, pointing their jaw to behind Carmilla. Oh this was too good- this was too easy. This was definitely something they could use. Carmilla huffed, and shut the door. Perry and Lafontaine exchanged a glance.

This was going to be interesting.

 

**Laura**

 

I watched as Carmilla shut the door, her toned back showing clearly. Laura bit her lip and shook her head.  _Did she just sleep in my bed? Why is she shirtless? AND SHE'S MISSING PANTS!_  Laura looked around the room to her Carmilla's shirt and said pants on the floor. Oh _god, oh did we? Did I? First time I see her in 8 years, and I possibly had sex with her while I was drunk._  Laura wiped the sleepiness from her eyes. 

"Um... We didn't... Um..." Carmilla turned around and smirked, but it was empty.

"Fuck? No." She said with a slightly bitter tone. Despite that, Laura sighed out of relief.  _Thank god I didn't completely screw that up._  Carmilla ran a hand through her hair, and gosh she needs to stop just existing because she's incredibly attractive. Laura's eyes scanned up and down Carmilla's body, admiring her features. Laura cursed herself for whatever babbled out of her mouth the night before. She can only hope she didn't make a complete fool of herself. 

"Oh, okay. That's good, that's probably good then." Laura said. There were a few moments of uncomfortable silence. What does she say now? Laura cleared her throat. "So I mean it was nice seeing you." Laura nearly cringed at her own words. That's all she can say? REALLY? Carmilla nodded.

"Yeah." She started picking up her clothes and pulling them on. Even now, she still shows the same signs as when she was troubled. Does she dare say something?

"Are you good?" _Are you good!?_ God this was so painstakingly awkward, Laura felt like she might actually die. Carmilla nodded and started to button up her pants.

"Mhm." Laura pursed her lips. The inner journalist in her wanted to press on, squeeze out what was bothering her. But the moment was so awkward and uncomfortable that Laura was too afraid to say anything. She rubbed the back of her neck. "I have to get to work. I'll see you around." And with that, Carmilla left. Laf and Perry were still standing outside the door, and the three exchanged awkward glances for a moment. With a scoff, Carmilla pushed past them, and Laura heard the front door open and close. 

"So." Perry said, breaking the tension. "How about we start cleaning?" 

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla sped out of the apartment as fast as she could.  _God, why am I such an idiot?_  She thought to herself as she pushed past the morning crowd.  _What was I thinking? What was I doing? I probably made her uncomfortable. The fear when she though we slept together- that shouldn't hurt as much as it does. I'm such a nostalgic idiot. Really, what else did I expect?_  

The journey home seemed longer than it ever had before. She felt embarrassed, and terrible for making Laura uncomfortable. There were too many people in the streets. Why were there so many people? They need to just stay home. Carmilla lengthened her strides as she paced through the streets, really just wanting to get back. She cared little for the bodies she was bumping into, her end goal of getting home staying in her mind. 

She bursted into her apartment, rushing up the mini-staircase to see JP on his laptop in the living room. Carmilla kicked off her boots angrily, earning JP's attention.

"You're home early." He teased. Carmilla rolled her eyes, really not having the patience for him.

"Not in the mood for jokes, JP." She shot back. She leaned down to pet Mircalla. Carmilla scratched behind her ears, causing the friendly pet to purr. _Why can't I just be a cat? A giant black cat._ JP closed the lid to his laptop.

"Why, did all your one night stands form an army and take you down? Vive La Hook Ups!" Carmilla threw the nearest object at JP (in this case being an empty soda can) and flipped him off. She picked up Mircalla in her arms, listening to her purr softly. Her black coat shined under the light. Carmilla started to feel a bit calmer from the cat in her arms, watching as her fur pressed beneath her hand. Carmilla sighed.

"No. I saw Laura, remember?" Carmilla moved to sit on the lounge chair, letting Mircalla move to make herself comfortable.

"And you spent the night? Isn't that a victory?" Carmilla shook her head. She was glad to have JP- he never judged, never forced Carmilla to talk about anything, and actually gave helpful advice. Despite the teasing and know-it-all persona, she was glad he lived with her.

"No, we didn't... You know. We were sorta drunk and I slept in her bed, I guess. And when she woke up she thought we did, and she looked scared. I don't know- it's stupid." JP hummed and rubbed his chin with his hand.

"Well, I mean waking up to your childhood friend in your bed- I can imagine she'd be scared that she ruined it by sleeping with you." Carmilla sighed and shrugged.

"I have no idea." She added a groan and threw her head back, resting it against the lounge chair. "I screwed it up. I screw everything up. She probably never wants to see me again. She probably wants nothing to do with me, and here I am hung up on her like the good old days. Broody, gay Carmilla stuck at home knowing she screwed up. I always screw up. I-" 

"Oh, shut up." JP interrupted, earning Carmilla's attention. "You do not. I sincerely doubt you screwed it up, and I sincerely doubt that she never wants to see you again. You did say she hugged you when she saw you again, right? Then she allowed you to sleep in her bed. If you truly believe you screwed things up, and if you truly care enough to be this hung up on an imaginary 'mistake' you made, then make it up to her. Don't stop trying. I know you're the confrontational type. Don't give up now." Carmilla sighed, and looked at JP again.

"God damn it, why do you always have to be right?" He chuckled and opened up his laptop again.

"It's second nature." She rolled her eyes and gently moved Mircalla off of her lap.  _He's right- I have to do something. I have to make it right; I have to fix this. I'll stop by her apartment after work. That's not too creepy, right? God I hope not._ Feeling a bit more relaxed now, Carmilla moved to her room and pulled out one of her philosophy books, thinking of what she could say.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura should be excited about her first day at the Uni, right? She should be smiling wide and acting chipper. She shouldn't be sitting in her classes, unable to take her thoughts away from the girl who slept in her bed. She shouldn't be sulking in classrooms, knowing that something was bothering her. She shouldn't be spacing out during the seminars, rekindling the memories of the night before. And she definitely shouldn't be more interested in the memory of Carmilla in a bra and boy shorts holding her than the magic of education. 

Laura groaned and dropped her forehead on her desk.

She has to do something- this is going to drive her crazy. She can't focus knowing if Carmilla is uncomfortable, knowing that something was bothering her when she stormed out. Did Laura do something? Did she say something? She groaned again.

"I know, this is boring as hell." Said a female voice. Laura slowly lifted her head to see a tall blonde sitting next to her. She had her laptop on her lap, browsing through tumblr. 

"Yeah." Laura said breathlessly. She folded her arms and rested her chin on them. _Right, class. That's important to focus on. Not_ Carmilla. 

"I'm Betty, by the way." She said, flashing Laura a cunning smile. 

"Laura." She greeted, before turning to look back at the old teacher moving about the front of the room, writing whatever on the board. Laura sighed and slumped farther in her seat. 

"I'm glad to know someone else finds this as boring as I do." Betty said, reblogging a photo of a happy couple. Laura refrained from groaning at the picture, but god damn it she'd be lying if she said it wasn't cute. It only made her think of Carmilla, and how she held her when she fell asleep. Laura sighed heavily.

"I don't even know if I find this class boring. I can't bring myself to pay attention." She muttered. Betty chuckled.

"That's probably a good sign that you find it boring." Laura smiled sadly.

"Yeah, I guess..." Laura sighed again and adjusted herself in her seat. What was he talking about again? 

"Something else bothering you?" Betty asked. Laura shrugged lazily.

"Sort of." Betty closed her laptop and rested her arms over it.

"Wanna talk about it? I know we just met and all but this," she gestured to Laura, who was wearing sweatpants and a hoodie, "is just depressing." Laura smirked and nodded.

"I think I screwed up with a friend- so to speak. I don't know, it's complicated." Laura had to tread carefully when talking about this. She knew that not all people are accepting, and to add to this the story is truly complicated, so there wasn't a lot of ways to put it.

"Is it a boy?" Laura shook her head, and took a deep breath. She can do this.

"A girl." She held her breath and waited for the blondes response, fearing the worse.

"Ah. Ex girlfriend drama?" Laura sighed out of relief. _Thank god._

"Something like that." Betty hummed and waited for Laura to continue. "We never, technically, dated I guess. We were best friends when we were kids, and on the last day we saw each other we kissed. 8 years later and we both ended up in Styria only a few blocks away from one another." Betty huffed.

"Wow. If that isn't a typical rom-com I don't know what is." Laura smiled and buried her head into the crook of her elbow.

"It's only a rom-com if it's funny. This is just depressing." Laura muttered.

"Awe hun." Betty started to rub soothing circles into Laura's back. Normally, Laura would be uncomfortable by the touch, or try to get the girl's number. But there was something so caring and trustworthy about the girl that Laura didn't mind.

"Last night we sort of, cuddled... Well, I mean, we fell asleep in each other's arms. But this morning I asked if we, y'know, cause we sort of fell asleep drunk and she didn't have a shirt nor pants on. I think I made her upset or uncomfortable or something, because she then stormed out."

"Why don't you visit her or something? Try and fix whatever happened." Laura picked her head up and looked at the blonde. She smiled warmly.

"Yeah, I think I might do that. Thanks." Betty smiled, and reopened her laptop. Laura looked out to the professor pacing below.

Maybe this class won't be so bad after all.

 

**Carmilla**

 

It was around 4:30, and Carmilla was working in the library/ mini-bookstore. There weren't a lot of customers today, and thank god for that. Carmilla was not in the mood to deal with people. To be fair, she never is. But especially not today. She doesn't know how she's going to make it up to Laura, or if Laura even wants to see her. How does she even open up?  _Hey, sorry if I made you uncomfortable when I took off my clothes and slept half-naked in your bed. Let's be friends again?_  Carmilla groaned.

 _Fuck. My. Life._  Carmilla thought to herself. She sighed and stared down at her book. She's been on the same page for nearly 20 minutes now, and normally she'd be halfway done with the book. Now it's hard for her to focus at all because of this girl. Carmilla's not a lovesick idiot; that's not how she operates. Girls swoon over her, she has one night stands, and forgets about them. This- no, this wasn't anything. She simply saw a friend, and she stripped. That happens, right? Laura's a pretty girl, of course her heart would skip a beat when she saw her.  _Carm_. She could hear her call her voice now, echoing in her head. Wait, is she actually calling her name? Carmilla lifted her gaze from her book to see Laura standing there.

"Carm?" Oh, so that wasn't in her head. Carmilla smiled awkwardly.

"Hey cupcake." Carmilla almost cringed. _Maybe it's because I want to eat you._  Carmilla really wishes she could just take that night back. "What are you doing here?" This is a good sign, right? She wouldn't visit if she hated her guts. Unless she's here to tell her to never contact her again. _Fuck._ Laura shrugged and put her hands in her jeans, and oh my. Do they fit her curves neatly. Nope- Carmilla can't be having those thoughts. She shook them away.

"I wanted to swing by." Carmilla smiled warmly, trying to put the caramel-haired girl at ease. Or is smiling creepy? Does she address the elephant in the room? The tension was so high it nearly broke through the roof.

"How thoughtful of you." Carmilla set her book down and leaned her arms against the table. Laura's eyes darted down to Carmilla's chest for a moment, sparking something inside of her. _Did she just... I definitely did not imagine that, right?_ It turned obvious by how intensely Laura was staring into Carmilla's eyes, doing her best not to look down. _Her eyes are going to pop out of her head if she keeps straining them like that. As much fun as it is for me, I better not torture the girl._ Carmilla straightened back up.

"Um... Listen, about last night..." Carmilla felt her heart sink into her stomach. _Here we go_. "I was just um," she's going to tell Carmilla to leave her alone, she's going to abandon her, this is it, "and I'm," this is it, say goodbye, "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable." Carmilla blinked a few times, dazed by what she said. _What did she just say?_

"What?" Carmilla said, not really meaning to.

"Yeah you just... You seemed kinda off when you left this morning, so..." Carmilla pressed her hand to her forehead.

"Oh my god." Carmilla muttered, staring into space for a moment. She looked back to Laura, who tensed up. "The only reason I was off was because I though I made you uncomfortable." Laura laughed and seemed to ease at the words. Carmilla couldn't help but smile. Her laugh; what a beautiful laugh. How she missed it. Laura smiled and held out her hand.

"How about we have a fresh start, yeah?" Carmilla slid her hand into Laura's and gingerly shook it. An electricity sparked between them as they touched, the atmosphere changing around them slowly. Carmilla smirked slyly at the girl.

"Deal." Laura's smile got impossibly wider. Carmilla missed having the little nugget around.

"Why don't I take you out to lunch tomorrow? We can go to that Joe's Diner or whatever." Laura shook Carmilla's hand and hung on for a moment. Laura bit her lip and Carmilla really wished she didn't do that, because god is it glorious. 

"Sounds good." Carmilla pulled her hand away and rested it on the table.

"So how were your classes?" The two talked for a while before Theo showed up to work, kicking Laura out in his own polite way. Carmilla could finally focus on her work, knowing that she didn't screw up, and that she was going to see Laura tomorrow. 

She didn't screw up, and thank god for that.

 

_**The Next Day** _

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla sat at the booth and waited anxiously for Laura. She took off her red plaid shirt and tied it around her waist. Carmilla checked her watch, seeing that it was 1:00 PM. _Where is she? This is the time, right? We both texted and agreed 1 o'clock. This is the time. Why isn't she here? Did she ditch me?_ Carmilla took a deep breath. _Calm down, Karnstein. It literally just turned one._ Carmilla's breath caught in her throat when she saw Laura.

She wore a fluffy white dress that dropped over one shoulder. Her hair was tied into a side pony-tail, flowing down over the exposed shoulder. Carmilla could see her bone structure clearly as Laura closed the door, revealing her toned arms as well. Carmilla's heart started to pound and she bit her lip. Laura accidentally knocked down the sign, and placed it back up. Carmilla refrained from laughing, and Laura still didn't seem to notice her. Laura straightened out the sign and held out her hands as if to say "stay" as she slowly backed away from it as if she was training a dog. Once she was sure it would follow her command, she started to straighten out her hair.

_This girl is both incredibly sexy and dorky. How the hell does she pull it off?_

Carmilla couldn't finish the thought as they locked eyes. Laura's cheeks went red, and she scurried to the booth, almost tripping along the way. She slid in across from Carmilla with a shy smile.

"Well don't you look like a virgin sacrifice." Carmilla teased, resting her arms on the table and leaning forward. Laura's cheeks turned a bit more pink and her eyes went wide for a second as she took in Carmilla's appearance. Carmilla wore a corset and tight leather pants along with the red plaid tied tightly around her waist.

"I'm not the one in a corset which... Wow." Carmilla smirked. Well, yeah. The only reason she wore the corset was because she was too lazy to do her laundry, and this was the only clothing with not too much whiff so she pulled it on. Carmilla knew she looked good in it, but was relieved when the tiny girl seemed to flush at her appearance.

"What's with the dress? You look like you're about to flee your brooding lover across the moors." Laura laughed and gestured to her outfit.

"Behold; vampire bait." Carmilla cocked an eyebrow. "Yeah. It's a costume for Drama class and I didn't have enough time to change, so here I am." Carmilla chuckled and shook her head.

"Sounds interesting."

"It was... Until someone tried to stake me. It was an improv skit." Carmilla tried to stop her smile, but it was impossible with the beautiful ray of sunshine beaming back at her.

"Who do I have to order a hit on?" She teased. Laura rolled her eyes.

"I didn't actually get staked. Just... Almost." Carmilla leaned closer to Laura across the table, as though she had some magnetic pull on her.

"What a tragedy it would be." She replied in a low voice. Laura cocked an eyebrow. "I just got you back, cupcake. I'm not letting you get away that easily." A smile spread across Laura's cheeks.

"I told you I'm not going anywhere." Laura retaliated. Carmilla bit her lip to try and stop the wide smile spreading on her own cheeks.

"You better keep that promise." She warned playfully.

"I always keep a promise, Carmilla." Carmilla stared into her honey brown eyes, feeling entranced. How was it possible that Laura was so inhumanely gorgeous? Carmilla wondered how she got so lucky to be able to talk to Laura, to sit with her, how lucky she was to feel at home with someone like Laura. Carmilla cursed herself. _Not even day three of reunion and I'm already turning sentimental... But maybe for her it's worth it._ The moment was quickly interrupted when a quirky brunette approached the table.

"Hi! I'm Stella. May I take your orders?" Carmilla looked up and smiled at the waitress. She was cute, and definitely Carmilla's type. Should she go for it? Well, cute girls sitting at the table never stopped her before. Plus, she might just be able to impress Laura with her moves... Carmilla gave her infamous seduction eyes and rested her head on her hand, leaning a bit forward.

"Are you available?" The girl laughed nervously and her cheeks turned crimson. 

"I'll have a hot chocolate." Laura said, interrupting Carmilla's romantic wiles. The waitress barely paid attention to Laura, briefly taking her eyes off Carmilla to write down the order. 

"And you?" Stella said, poking Carmilla's shoulder with her pen. Ouch? Why'd she poke Carmilla? Whatever- she's just going to impress Laura with her flirting abilities and take the unnecessary jabbing.

"Black coffee." Carmilla replied.

"Wonderful! I'll be back." She said with a wink. Carmilla snickered to herself and looked back to Laura, who looked like she was ready to decapitate someone. _Uh-oh. Not impressed- definitely not impressed. That is NOT the look of someone who's impressed._

"Really?" Laura said, crossing her arms and giving Carmilla a pointed look. Carmilla had to admit; she liked seeing Laura angry. There was something about it that just made something spark inside Carmilla. Made her want to ebb her on. But knowing she was mad at Carmilla turned it off, and she decided not to increase it. Carmilla shrugged.

"What? She's cute. Plus, there's never a bad time to practice my moves." Laura raised her eyebrows.

"So she was just... Practice?" Carmilla shrugged.

"In a sense." Laura scoffed and shook her head.

"You can't use people like that, Carmilla."

"Yeah well I don't exactly do the whole relationship thing. Not my forte." Carmilla replied with snark. She hated when people told her this; especially the guilt that comes with it. After Elle, this is all she really knows. She doesn't like to confront it, nor talk about it. 

"You can do the whole _non-relationship thing_ without using people. It's not that hard." Laura snapped back. Carmilla's eyes went wide for a brief moment. Once Carmilla brought out the snark, people always backed off. Or at least, they didn't snap back like this. They never confronted her. There _is_ something about her... Carmilla smirked and leaned forward on the table.

"I'm not used to being stood up to, cupcake." Laura raised her eyebrows and huffed.

"Well, better get used to it." Laura retorted. Carmilla bit the inside of her bottom lip. She liked this. No one has ever challenged her before- not like this at least. And for her to stay level headed yet so angry? What a toxic mix that Carmilla wanted to drown in. But last time she checked, Laura wasn't the confrontational type, right? She certainly didn't seem it at the very least. What changed? Carmilla couldn't fight the urge to add to this fire.

"You jealous, cutie?" Laura seemed to flush a bit, and Carmilla took that as a victory.

"No. I just... I used to be like that- using girls. So I get it." Carmilla's eyes went wide for a moment. Well, she certainly didn't expect that. 

"Cutie's got a dark side." Laura smiled, and leaned forward.

"We all do." She replied pruriently. _Whoa- how can she just flip like that? One minute she's dorky, the next she's angry, and the next she's... Giving me seduction eyes. My god._  Carmilla watched something darken behind her eyes, and was transfixed on it. All trace of her being the ray of sunshine was gone; what was this, and why did Carmilla enjoy it so much? Their stare off was interrupted by the quirky waitress placing their drinks down.

"Here you go! And here are your menus. Sorry, I forgot to bring them earlier. I kind of got distracted..." She said, poking Carmilla with her pen. _Is she going to stop stabbing me with that thing?_ Carmilla pretended that the girl barely existed and looked down at her menu.

"Don't you got somewhere to be, buttercup?" Carmilla said, reading through her options.

"Right so, I'll be back." Stella replied, and darted off. Carmilla felt a foot kick her leg and she yelped, her hand moving to the source of the pain.

"Ow! What was that for?" Carmilla said, rubbing her hand down her shin to soothe the pain. _Damn, can Laura really kick. Did she take Krav Maga or something?_ Carmilla tried to think if she ever did.

"Carm! I said don't use people, not completely shun them!" Laura retaliated in a hushed voice, leaning closer to the table. "Are you alright?" Carmilla eyed Laura. This girl is seriously going to give her whiplash with how fast she changes.

"I'll be fine." Carmilla straightened up and leaned back in her seat. "Jesus Laura. Were you part of a soccer team or something? You've got a foot of steel."

"Sorry, sorry." She pursed her lips, seeming to get continuously worried. "Do you need anything?" 

"A new leg." Laura laughed, and Carmilla suddenly didn't mind the pain anymore. She brought her mug to her lips and took a deep sip of her black coffee. "So why hot cocoa?" Carmilla pointed her jaw to Laura's mug. She shrugged.

"I hate coffee." Carmilla chuckled.

"Why am I not surprised?" 

"What's that supposed to mean?" Carmilla leaned forward a bit, giving Laura a challenging look.

"Everything about you is sweet." Laura bit her lip and smiled.

"Everything about you is bitter." Laura teased. Carmilla smirked, and began her famous seduction eyes again.

"But opposites attract, right?" Laura took her mug between her hands and leaned back in her booth. 

"You flirt with every girl that passes your way?" Carmilla shrugged and took a small sip of her coffee, provocatively licking her lips afterwards.

"Only the ones worth my while." Laura shook her head to herself and picked up her menu, interfering with Carmilla's staring game.

"Pick out what you want." Laura said. Carmilla chuckled and picked up her menu and started to read through her options. She loved this- the challenge, the confusion, the flirting. This was different- refreshing even. For once, she wasn't bored. Carmilla smiled.

She really is something special.

 

**Laura**

 

After a few more minutes, they decided on what they wanted. Carmilla motioned for the waitress to come back, and, surprise surprise, she happily obliged, practically skipping to the table. 

"Do you know what you want?" Stella said, completely ignoring that Laura was even there. _Hello? I'm a person too._

"The special." Carmilla replied, handing the waitress her menu. "Though, you'd be better." Laura fought the urge as best as she could to not throw her hot cocoa at her. Seriously? She just had this talk with Carmilla. The waitress blushed and quickly tucked her menu under her arm. 

"And you?" Stella said, finally turning to Laura. She thinks this is the first time she's looked at her since she ever got here.

"I'll have the special as well." Laura cocked an eyebrow and glanced to Carmilla. Really, she had no clue what the special was. But she was too busy gawking at Carmilla to figure it out, and now she was too focused on not tossing her mug at Carmilla to re-read it. The waitress collected Laura's menu and scurried off. 

"Seriously Carmilla!" Laura exclaimed as soon as Stella was out of ear shot. Carmilla went wide-eyed and crossed her arms.

"What?" Does she really not know?

"My god you are something else. When I said don't shun her out, I didn't mean flirt with her again!" Carmilla smirked and leaned forward on the table again, only this time her cleavage hang down. Laura tried to keep her eyes trained on Carmilla's. (Tried to).

"What? Do you feel threatened?" Laura furrowed her eyebrows.

"Uh, no?" Carmilla bit her lip and patted Laura's hand.

"Why don't we make it into a competition? Who ever gets her number wins." Laura rolled her eyes.

"Carmilla, women are not a game and something to be fought over. They are their own people and make their own choices."

"And if they chose to give a girl their number, so what?" Laura gave Carmilla a pointed look. "Oh, come on. You might even get a girlfriend out of it." Laura almost cringed at the word. She swore she had stopped, but sometimes her name would still poison her like the toxins through a snake bite _. Alice..._ Laura shook her head.

"I'm with you on the whole entire non-doing of the relationship thing." Laura muttered, bringing her hot cocoa to her mouth and taking a big gulp. Carmilla eyed Laura, silently asking her why. Laura sighed. "Ex-girlfriend bullshit." 

"Ah. Now _that_ I can relate to." Carmilla held up her mug and they clinked theirs together before taking a few sips. "So what's your story?" Laura sighed and shrugged.

"Third time seeing each other and you wanna go down _that_ road?" Laura quirked an eyebrow.

"Touche." Laura hummed in agreement. "So how are you liking town? That's like small talk material, right?" Laura snickered and nodded her head.

"Yeah, it is. I like it. It's not too big, not too populated. But not too small either. It's nice." Carmilla looked down at her drink, seeming to plan something in her head.

"I could show you around sometime." She said nonchalantly. Laura perked up a bit. Another chance to hang out with Carmilla? She's totally down for that.

"Really?" Carmilla nodded.

"Mhm. What are your plans tomorrow?" Laura sighed. Right, school. Life doesn't just evolve around hot childhood friends in corsets.

"Well, tomorrow I have an essay to begin. The next night, I'll probably be working on it as well. The night after that Danny and Kirsch promised to show me around campus, so that leaves me free Friday. You free then?" Carmilla smiled.

"You're quite the busy bee, cupcake. Yeah, I'm free then." Laura smiled.

"Ok! Awesome!" _Okay awesome bye!_ The words chimed in her head. The last words she ever said to Carmilla- or what she thought were going to be her last words. Laura smiled, and stared at Carmilla as she took another sip from her mug.

How did things ever end up like this?

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Lafontaine buzzed at the entrance of the kindergarten, and checked their watch for the millionth time. _She said her lunch break was at 12, right? That's what she said_. Lafontaine questioned themselves. A lady on the other end replied, and Lafontaine stated why they were there. Another buzzing sound commenced, and they walked in.

They were surprised how easy it was to get access to the school. I mean sure, they were simply dropping off lunch for their girlfriend. But what if they were carrying a bomb in this bag? They definitely did not fit into the whole "school" scene. _Whatever- just drop lunch off at Perry's and worry about the school's security later_ Lafontaine. They smiled as they walked down the halls of their kindergarten, remembering their own. Lafontaine found it truly bizarre how Carmilla ended up back into their lives somehow, and how the group remained to stay together like this. They thought of childhood memories- mostly of Perry. Sometimes they thought of how cheesy their story was with her; childhood friends, grow to be a relationship, end up being absolutely perfect for each other. Neither of them have been with anyone else. They smiled.

_We're the perfect match._

They found their way to Perry's room and knocked on the door. They were a few minutes late, and was sure Perry wouldn't be there. But surprise surprise there she was, cleaning up a room that really didn't need to be cleaned up. Perry's eyes lit up once she saw Lafontaine.

"Oh my gosh hey!" Perry exclaimed, dropping whatever she was doing to pull Lafontaine into a hug. Lafontaine wrapped their free arm around her waist and they shared a quick kiss. "Why are you here?" She asked, her arms still clasped tightly around Lafontaine's neck. They pulled up the bag of take-out food.

"Got you some lunch." They said, wiggling their eyebrows. Perry smiled widely and kissed their cheek. _Yeah, the trouble it took to get this salad and escape the lab was totally worth it to see her smile._ They couldn't help but smile at her wide one.

"Oh my goodness thank you so much! I'm starving!" Perry took the bag and retreated to her desk. Lafontaine sat on the corner of the desk, the chairs in the room being fairly too small for any adult to fit in. Perry pulled out the Caesar salad and started digging into it.

"You know, the school really needs a security check. I mean I came here with a paper bag, nervously checking my watch every twenty seconds and they still let me in the school. All I had to do was say I was here to see you and they buzzed me right in." Perry hummed in agreement and swallowed a piece of lettuce sticking out the corner of her mouth.

"I know. But since it's the first couple days every things so hectic." She smiled, and placed her hand over Lafontaine's. "I'm glad your here." They smiled back, and she gave their hand a quick squeeze before returning to devour the meal.

Yeah, the trouble was so worth it.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Finally, the night had come. This was the one thing Carmilla was looking forward to all week. Sure, Laura and Carmilla had hung out a bit in-between. But not like this; not all alone. 

Carmilla wore a short sleeved black midriff with black jeans and combat boots. She looked to the digital clock on the dresser beside her.

**7:14**

Carmilla groaned and leaned back on her bed. She hasn't done this since she was a teen; anxiously waiting for the time to come, or being extra early. Carmilla was always the one to be late, or to make a girl wait a bit before arriving. It was never reversed. Why did Laura make her act this way? Make her feel like she's young and carefree again? Why'd she make her heart pound and thoughts wander? Did Carmilla have the same affect on Laura? And why did she care about that anyway? It's not like Carmilla has a crush on her or anything... Right?

Carmilla's heart nearly jumped in her throat when there was a knock on her door. Carmilla jumped up and straightened out her hair, checking herself out in the mirror before exiting her room. Her heart pounded in her chest, and she wondered why it was doing that. It wasn't like she hasn't hung out with Laura before. She made sure to recollect herself, trying to be cool and disaffected. Carmilla swung the door opened, and yeah Laura really wasn't helping with her heart. 

Laura wore a grey-blue button up shirt with dark grey pants and brown flats. A smile automatically came to Carmilla's face, and Laura returned the smile. (Not going to seem cool and disaffected with that smile, but she can't help it).

"Hi." Carmilla said breathlessly.

"Hi." Laura replied. Suddenly a meow sounded, followed by the trotting of her black cat. 

"Oh, sorry. JP! Call Mircalla!" Carmilla shouted. She was not about to have her cat ruin the moment- no matter how insanely adorable she is. (Though Laura's more adorable).

"MIRCALLA!" JP called. Mircalla's ears perked up, and she took off after the voice. Carmilla took the opportunity to jolt down the stairs, closing the door behind her before Mircalla could catch onto her plan.

"Sorry about that. She's a little clingy." Carmilla locked the door and shoved her key in her pocket. "Ready to go, creampuff?" Carmilla said, holding out her arm. Laura smiled and bit her lip.

"Ready." She slid her arm into Carmilla's. Why did this feel like a date to her? It wasn't, right? No, no it isn't. Carmilla's being silly. Just two childhood friends, hanging out. 

"Where do you want to see first cutie?" Carmilla asked.

"Uh, I wouldn't know. I'm new here." Carmilla went pale for a moment. _Way to start this off, Karnstein._ Carmilla played it off with a laugh.

"Right, right. Well, I guess we can start with the mains." Carmilla said, smiling down at the smaller girl. Laura smiled back, and nodded. 

If she kept acting this cute, Carmilla feared her heart might actually make a run for it.

 

**Laura**

 

After a few hours of being chauffeured around town, Carmilla and Laura ended up at the park. It was quiet, and not a lot of people were walking around. The two girls were laying on the grass next to each other, staring at the stars above. Carmilla laid with one hand on her stomach and the other behind her head. Laura laid next to her with her hands folded over her abdomen. It felt like everything was just perfect, like she lived in her own little world with Carmilla. She hasn't felt this happy since she learned she was accepted into Silas University. It was just so... Serene, but so alive at the same time. 

"Isn't it weird how we just ended up back together?" Laura suddenly stated, watching as the stars twinkled above.

"It is. Sometimes I wonder if things really happen for a reason when it comes to things like this, but then again theres too much shit that happens to ever believe such a thing." Carmilla replied. 

"I believe it." Laura muttered a bit bashfully. She's always believed that everything happens for a reason down to her core. 

"Why?" Laura shrugged.

"I have to. There has to be a reason for all of the terrible things in the world. It can't all be for nothing, right? There has to be a reason. I mean, if things didn't happen exactly as they did, I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be here in Styria, I wouldn't be living with Perry and Laf, I wouldn't be able to go to school with Kirsch and Danny, wouldn't be going to school at all maybe..." Laura paused for a moment. "I wouldn't be here with you." Laura turned to look at Carmilla, only to see she was already looking back at her. She stared into her dark brown eyes, seeing a world of pain flash through them, only to be replaced by some unfathomable emotion before her walls were built back up. Carmilla smirked and look back to the sky.

"I suppose." Laura turned on her side and poked Carmilla's hip. 

"I expected you to spew out some philosophy major lines. Not just a simple 'I suppose'." Carmilla laughed and met Laura's gaze once more, sending her heart to pace rapidly.

"Am I one to be predictable?" Carmilla challenged, cocking an eyebrow and winking. Laura snickered, and Carmilla turned on her side as well. Under the moonlight, Carmilla's hair shined. Her skin glowed, and somehow her eyes seemed fuller. Laura felt butterflies form an army in her stomach, her heart starting to pound like a hammer to a nail. Her beauty always seemed to catch Laura off guard at random moments, leaving her breathless. In the way she laugh, the way she smiled, the way she spoke or the way she stared at the stars. Without really thinking about it, Laura reached out and caressed Carmilla's cheek. For a moment, Carmilla stilled as though she's never been touched softly. But she eased into the touch, closing her eyes even. Laura stroked her thumb over Carmilla's cheekbone. She outlined Carmilla's features with her eyes, her heart swelling in her chest as she did so. It was like she was hand-made by some sort of god she didn't believe in. Under the moonlight, her eyes closed, looking so peaceful...

"You're beautiful, Carmilla." Laura said before she even had a chance to stop herself. Carmilla's eyes slowly opened. Laura would normally flush at her sudden statement, but she was too entranced by Carmilla's fixated gaze to care. Carmilla smiled, and held the hand on her cheek.

"You are too." She whispered. Laura scooted closer, their faces inches apart. Carmilla's eyes went wide for a moment, and she admired Laura's appearance for a moment, her eyes trailing up and down. Laura felt like she was floating for a passing of time, as though there was no care in the world. It was just her and Carmilla. Carmilla and her dark brown eyes, her raven hair, her sharp jawline and soft hand. Carmilla slowly inched forward and pressed their foreheads together. Laura's eyes fluttered shut, ready for where ever the moment takes them.

"Hey Laura?" Carmilla whispered, her breath brushing past Laura.

"Yeah?" Carmilla tightened her grip of Laura's hand.

"You know I'm not going to leave either, right?" Laura smiled, a warm flowing through her body.

"I know." She whispered. Everything felt so perfect just then, like they were the world spun around them and they were the axis. Carmilla let go of Laura's hand and slowly trailed it down her forearm, causing Laura's heart to pound, nerves sparking alive one by one. Carmilla rested her hand on Laura's hip and brushed her thumb over the exposed skin, which Laura didn't even know was showing until she did. Laura thought that it shouldn't have much of an affect on her as it did, making her breath hitch like that, her heart to race, her thoughts to wander, she needed something to hold onto, something more of Carmilla. 

Laura moved her hand from Carmilla's cheek and to the back of her head, letting her fingers get tangled in her hair. Was it bad that she wanted to kiss her just then? It became apparent how close they were, and how easy it would be. Should Laura just do it? It would be so simple. Just lean in... Carmilla must have been reading her mind, because she slowly started to lean in. Their noses bumped, she could feel her breath brushing past her lips. They were so close when-

"Ay! Lovebirds! We're closing up!" Their eyes shot open and they immediately jumped away from each other. Laura swallowed nervously and Carmilla shot to her feet.

"Sorry sir!" Carmilla called to the shouting police officer. Carmilla offered her hand to Laura, and it took her a moment to recollect herself enough to grab the slender hand. Carmilla pulled her to her feet, and they started walking out of the park in silence. The scene flashed in Laura's mind. Was she about to... Were they about to... What? Was she even sure that they... Did she even know? He called them lovebirds, right? They were close, but was Carm actually leaning in to kiss her, or did Laura just imagine that?

Laura's heart didn't calm with her thoughts, her cheeks didn't pale, her mind couldn't stop spinning. All she could think of was if they were going to, or if she just imagined that. And what it could be like if they actually did... It wasn't until they were nearly a block away that Laura decided to break the silence.

"So, the park has a curfew?" Laura asked, trying to ignore their conjoined hands. Why did this feel so right? Normally, she'd be running at the first sign of commitment, or that she has a crush. But this time... What was different? Carmilla chuckled.

"Yeah. A couple of lackwits on a drunken night is all it took to ruin it for everyone." Laura nodded, still a bit speechless. They walked in silence a bit more. What would happen if there wasn't? If no cop intruded the moment? Carmilla was going to kiss her, right? For god's sake, Laura's 19! She's thinking and acting like she's 14 again. She's an adult- sort of. She should just confront this head on... But it's too upfront. Maybe if she just doesn't confront it, it'll be less awkward.

"So I like the town." Carmilla sighed, and Laura gave her hand a squeeze. Carmilla looked to Laura, and Laura offered a warm smile. Carmilla smiled back, and looked to the nearly-barren streets ahead.

"Yeah, I really like it here." Carmilla replied. She wrapped her arm around Laura's shoulder, and Laura snaked her arm around Carmilla's waist.

She'll just have to ignore it for now.

 

**Carmilla**

 

After she dropped Laura off at her apartment, Carmilla carefully snuck her way into her own. A smile still spread on her cheeks from the night she just had. The smell of Laura still lingered on her clothing, the memories fresh in her mind. 

 

_"So why a library?" Laura asked suddenly as they walked down the street, Carmilla's arm slung over her shoulders, Laura's arm wrapped tightly around Carmilla's waist. For the sake of her sanity, she did her best to ignore how close they were._

_"Hm?" Carmilla replied, looking down at the small girl. Warm brown eyes stared back at her._

_"Why work at a library?" Carmilla blinked a few times. She never really thought about why she was so interested in books, nor why she chose to work at a library. No ones ever cared to ask her that before, nor has she ever thought about it. Carmilla shrugged, and shifted her gaze back to the dark streets ahead._

_"Dunno. No one's ever cared enough to know why, and I never considered why I would."_

_"Well, I care enough to know why. So start considering." Carmilla smiled shyly, thinking about her answer for a moment. She cares?_

_"The obvious is I like books, I guess. I love reading." Laura chuckled._

_"Why do you love reading?" Carmilla paused again, trying to ponder over the questions._

_"You know, no ones ever asked me these questions before. My answers are probably boring anyway." Laura shrugged, and adjusted her arm around Carmilla's waist to a tighter grip._

_"Nothing is boring with you." Carmilla peeped down at the smaller girl, seeing a blush reach her cheeks. She was stunned for a moment. Really, no one ever bothered to ask Carmilla these things. No one really cared. Even when she would talk somewhat about herself, she always felt that she was a bore. The fact that she was actually interested amazed Carmilla._

_"It's an escape from reality, I suppose. You get to live in someone else's world, in someone else's mind. I love how characters are described, how they grow, how they act. I love how each writer imagines things so differently. No author sees the sunset the same way." Carmilla suddenly felt embarrassed at the lines she just spewed out, and bowed her head. This is why people shouldn't let her talk. Carmilla turned to the tiny girl only to see her warm brown eyes gazing at her in amazement. She simply smiled at Carmilla._

_"You know, you should be a philosophy major." Carmilla couldn't stop the smile that came to her expression._

 

Carmilla closed the door behind her as quietly as she could. She gazed down at her hand as she retracted it from the knob, remembering the way Laura's fit in hers so perfectly. 

 

_"Why do you always do that?" Laura said as they came to halt in front of her apartment building. Carmilla eyed her suspiciously._

_"Do what?" She asked. Laura brought their conjoined hands up next to her head._

_"Hold on to my hand so tightly." Carmilla shrugged._

_"Maybe I'm scared that I'll lose you again." She said sheepishly. A shy smile played on Laura's lips. Laura bowed her head slightly and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear._

_"You won't." Carmilla cocked an eyebrow. "I promised you I wouldn't go anywhere." Laura muttered. When she lifted her gaze to meet Carmilla's, Carmilla could see how soft they looked just then. So big, so beautifully brown. Carmilla smiled slightly._

_"I'm going to hold you to that." Carmilla teased. Laura bit her lip, and rolled back on her heels._

_"Goodnight, Carm."_

_"Night cupcake." Carmilla was ready to walk away, when Laura reached up and planted a kiss on her cheek._

 

Carmilla lifted her hand to her cheek, remembering where Laura's once were. She smiled to herself and kicked off her boots. This girl was going to be the death of her, she swears it. 

Carmilla slowly walked up the stairs, careful not to make too much noise. But when her foot hit the final step, the lamp in the living room flickered on. JP sat on the lounge chair with a book in his hand, his eyes staring at Carmilla above the pages.

"Not so fast." He said. Carmilla groaned.

"I was so quiet..." Carmilla was sure she could make it home and escape JP's questions. 

"I've been waiting here for like a half hour." Carmilla groaned. _He literally waited for me to get home just so he could pester me_. "Give me the details!" Carmilla rolled her eyes, and Mircalla bumped her head against Carmilla's legs. She smiled, and picked up the friendly cat. Carmilla made her way to the couch, Mircalla laying on her lap. She stroked the charcoal fur, letting it brush under her fingers. "So how'd it go?" Carmilla smiled again at the memories of the night before.

"Amazing." She replied. "I mean, a lot happened I suppose. I showed her all around the city, and then we went to the park." Carmilla's smile widened, remembering what happened. "We had a little moment, but a cop busted in and ruined it." JP snapped and slammed his foot on the ground.

"God damn it! Cops always ruin the fun. Like I need another reason to hate them..." Carmilla rolled her eyes. JP always had run ins with the law- nothing too serious. Mostly they think he's doing something suspicious, when really he's trying to study an old nickel he found on the ground. They've thought he was in a gang at one point, but he was actually studying gang behavior. The cops have also thought he was part of a drug ring at one point, but the "mushrooms" he was talking about were the exploding spores on campus. Basically, everything JP does is for some sort of experiment. Cops never seem to understand that about JP.

"Anyway, she kissed my cheek when we said goodnight, so I'd call that a success." JP eyed her for a moment with a broad smile.

"Carmilla?"

"Yeah?" He leaned back in the lounge chair.

"I haven't seen you smile like that in a long time." Carmilla smiled again, and scratched under Mircalla's chin.

"Yeah, she has that affect on me." 

 

**Laura**

 

Laura carefully closed the door behind her as she treaded into her apartment. For a moment, she thought that Laf and Perry were asleep. That was until a flashlight shined in her eyes. Laura hissed at the pain and held her arms up in front of her eyes.

"What the hell?" She exclaimed, trying to hide from the bright light shining in her face. A loud laughter soon followed, along with the lights in the apartment switching on.

"Laura Hollis. Why are you here so late?" Lafontaine teased, turning off the flash light. Laura blinked the dots out of her eyes and lowered her arms. Lafontaine stood in the kitchen in blue plaid pajamas, a grape soda in hand.

"I was out with Carmilla. I told you that." Laura replied as she shrugged off her jacket, Carmilla's divine scent still lingering. Lafontaine ambled to the fridge and grabbed another grape soda.

"Care to tell your good ol' pal Lafontaine what happened? You know, the one you keep ditching for said girl?" Laura rolled her eyes.

"I literally live with you, y'know." They laughed and tossed Laura the can, to which Laura surprisingly caught. She tapped the top of it before opening the tab with a pop.

"So you wanna spill what went down tonight?" They asked, wiggling their eyebrows. Laura took a sip and shrugged.

"Maybe." She teased, tossing her jacket onto the couch.

"Awe, c'mon. Don't leave a mad scientist hanging." Laura rolled her eyes and plopped down on the couch. She took a long sip of her soda, trying to stop the smile that came with the memories.

"She showed me around town, I saw a couple buildings, we almost kissed, I saw-"

"Whoa what!" They rushed over to the couch, taking the seat next to Laura. Laura her smile behind the can. She was not about to let Lafontaine see how dorky she was smiling right then. "You can't just leave it at that." She shrugged.

"Oh. But I can." Lafontaine groaned.

"Come on, L. Give me a little something." They said, tapping her knee. Laura chuckled and took a big gulp of her soda.

"We were sitting in the park, and we almost kissed. Until a cop totally called us out and kicked us out of the park. Did you know they have a curfew?" Lafontaine leaned back and crossed their arms.

"Wow. Romantic." Laura was taken aback.

"Hey hey. It was not romantic. It's all... Platonic. Simply two childhood friends, walking around the city and almost kissing. That's it." Maybe if Laura said that enough times out loud, she'd actually start to believe it. 

"Platonic. Sure." The two talked for a while before going to bed. Mostly Lafontaine teasing Laura on having a crush, and Laura being in complete denial of having one. Still, as she crawled into bed that night, a smile was still wide across her cheeks at the memories of the late night adventure.

Carmilla really is something special.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY SO WHEN I WROTE THIS I LEARNED I'VE BEEN SPELLING KINDERGARTEN WRONG
> 
> MY WHOLE LIFE I THOUGHT IT WAS KINDER GARDEN NOT KINDERGARTEN OMG EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED FOR ME
> 
> WHY AM I LIKE THIS


	13. Party At Carmilla's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The crew finally reunites!

**Laura**

 

It's been a few weeks since Carmilla and Laura reunited. The two were still hanging out, along with the occasional Perry and Lafontaine. A couple weeks ago Laura had told Kirsch and Danny that Carmilla was there- who wanted to see her as soon as they got settled into college. And so, now that they were settled, tonight they were planning on heading out to Carmilla's apartment for drinks and to catch up.  Laura spread the news to everyone else, offering Carmilla's address. Laura was now on her couch, her laptop pulled onto her lap as she mercilessly typed out an essay for her lit class. It wasn't due for a while, but she figured she might as well get a head start on it.

Laura was deeply into it as Taylor Swift played through her headphones when her phone buzzed. Laura sighed and turned off her music.  _Sorry T-Swift, lit essay. Give me a moment._ Laura whipped out her phone, and her heart skipped a bit upon seeing the name lit up on her screen.

_**Carm:**  Why must organizing a party be so incredibly dull? _

Laura smiled, and typed out a quick reply.

_**Carm:** Is everyone still on for tonight? JP has been hounding me with questions all day._

_**Laura:** As far as I know, yeah. Why? Do you need help setting up anything?_

_**Carm:** Not particularly. But if you want to swing by early you can. _

Laura's eyes widened at the text for a moment. Alone, with Carmilla? No way she's going to pass that up- in a completely platonic way of course. She's excited to see her friend.

_**Laura:** I'd be down. When?_

_**Carm:** Whenever you want. JP's out getting groceries or something. I'm alone, gay, and bored; I'll take whatever company I can get._

_**Laura:** I'm on my way._

Laura practically leaped off her couch and to her room. She was currently wearing sweatpants and a doctor-who tee, and theres no way she's going like that. Laura rummaged through her clothes before pulling out a red plaid dress with a belt on the waist and tights. She tore off her lazy clothes and tossed the outfit on. Laura applied eyeliner and fixed her hair, making sure to look presentable but not like she was trying too hard. Laura slipped on her flats and grabbed a black-bunny sweater. 

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla laid on the floor with Mircalla sleeping on her abdomen. She was tossing an apple in the air. She didn't plan on eating it, but it was sure as hell fun to toss it around. It was a race between Laura and JP to free Carmilla of this boredom spell- or at least that's how Carmilla saw it. It was a few minutes later when she heard a knock at her door. Carmilla groaned.

She's _not_ getting off the floor.

"It's open!" Carmilla called, hoping he was loud enough. She heard the door rattle, open and close followed by quiet footsteps. She looked to see Laura standing behind the couch, looking around for Carmilla, an adorable confused expression on her face. Carmilla smirked. _How can one girl look so innocent, yet carry so much sex appeal?_ Carmilla shook her head. _Platonically, of course._ "Down here, buttercup." Carmilla said as she started to toss the apple in the air again, catching it every time. Laura jumped upon seeing Carmilla on the floor.

"Oh. Hey there, cat. Other cat." Laura teased. Carmilla sneered at how absolutely terrible that joke was. Laura smiled and giggled at her own cheesy remark. "So is this how you greet all your guests?" Laura said, taking a seat on the couch. Carmilla went to look at Laura, but all she could focus on was how she could see up her dress. Carmilla immediately averted her eyes to the ceiling. 

"Only the special ones." Carmilla replied with a smirk. Laura huffed a chuckle and crossed her arms.

"You have a nice place." Laura muttered, looking around at the surrounding room. "What's your cat's name?"

"You're going to have to be more specific to which pussy you mean cutie." Carmilla has gotten used to teasing/flirting with Laura (platonically, of course), and the girl always either replies with an equally flirtatious comment/tease or the rolling of her eyes. Carmilla always played a game with herself of guessing which one it will be, and Laura never ceases to surprise her, because sometimes theres a mystery option.

"The one that girls actually like." Laura replied. Carmilla caught the apple and shot Laura a look. _It's a comment this time, then._ Carmilla smirked. _It's on, Hollis._

"Are you saying that girls don't like me?" Carmilla challenged. Laura shrugged, and rested her elbows on her knees as she leaned forward.

"Maybe." Carmilla propped herself on her own elbows and gazed up at Laura, trying to use her infamous seduction eyes to fluster the girl.

"And what about you?" Carmilla said in a low, sultry tone, fluttering her lashes. She watched as Laura gulped, a pink reaching her cheeks, but she was quick to react.

"If you get so many girls, it shouldn't matter what I think." Laura replied, tangling her hands together as they draped between her open legs. _Don't look don't look don't look._ (She failed miserably).

"It's always helpful to have constructive criticism, Laura." Carmilla replied. She's crossing into dangerous territory, dangerous this-is-definitely-not-platonic territory. But with Laura on the other side, it's hard for Carmilla not to cross it. Laura smirked slightly.

"You are unbelievable." Laura said, the tension that was just building up dying down again. Carmilla took a moment to regain her breath that she didn't know she lost.

"I try to be." Carmilla replied, laying back down and tossing the apple back in the air.

"So, really. What's your cat's name?" Laura asked, whatever tension that was there completely gone now.

"Mircalla." Laura chuckled. "What?" Carmilla said. _Is that an unreasonable name?_

"Why did I ever think that it wouldn't be named somewhat after you?" Carmilla rolled her eyes and smiled.

"Didn't think anyone would figure that out. It was an inside joke with myself." Carmilla replied. "You can pet her if you want. She's a sweetheart." Carmilla offered as an after thought. 

"Can I?" She nodded.

"Go for it." Laura pushed herself off the couch and knelt beside her. Carmilla tried to look as disaffected as possible at the close proximity between the two girls. Laura started to pet the sleeping Mircalla on Carmilla's stomach, causing the cat to purr. Carmilla tried to stifle her smile.

"She's really soft." Laura murmured, her hand mindlessly stroking the cat. A part of Carmilla's shirt was riled up slightly above her hipbone, as she noticed just then as Laura's hand kept accidentally brushing against it. Carmilla held her breath, trying to focus on the apple she was tossing around. _Cool it, Karnstein._ Carmilla felt her heart slowly start to pick up it's pace.

"Yeah..." Carmilla muttered breathlessly. She caught the apple and clenched hard when Laura hit a nerve on her skin. She squeezed the apple tightly in her hand, the feeling resonating even after her hand left. _Did she just do that on purpose?_ Carmilla looked up to Laura, who seemed completely entranced by the cat. _Does she even realize what she's doing to me?_ Carmilla shook her head and started tossing the apple in the air again. _Cool. It. Karnstein._ But Carmilla found her vision drifting back to Laura, her warm brown eyes, her round cheeks, her soft smile, her smooth skin. Her- _OW!_ Carmilla's train of thoughts stopped when the apple landed and hit her head.

"Augh!" Carmilla exclaimed as the apple attacked her cheek. Laura broke into laughter and Carmilla sat up, rubbing her cheek. "What the frilly hell?" Carmilla muttered to herself, trying to sooth the pain on her cheek. Mircalla slid off of Carmilla's lap and started bumping her head below Carmilla's chin, rubbing her soft cheeks against Carmilla. Carmilla shoed the cat away.

"Damn, I didn't give apples enough credit. Who knew they'd actually hurt someone?" Laura said, chuckling a bit more. _Way to go, Carmilla. Great fucking job._

"Yeah yeah." Carmilla grumbled. Laura scooted closer.

"Okay, come on Isaac Newton. Let me look." Carmilla eyed Laura warily for a moment. "My dad's an EMT, remember?" Carmilla huffed and turned her face so Laura could see her cheek. Laura grabbed Carmilla's wrist to pry her hand from the source of the pain. Laura seemed distracted by the mark, but all Carmilla was stare at was how beautiful Laura looked then. Her warm brown eyes, that soft smile, her hospitality... Carmilla missed being taken care of by Laura like she always had when they were younger. She started clearing some hair from Carmilla's face, smoothing it out. Laura always gave the nurture and care Carmilla always craved, but didn't know she did until moments like this. 

"You're fine. Just a simple case of _overreacting._ " Laura teased, smiling warmly. Carmilla couldn't move, she could only stare at the girl before her. Laura's eyes locked on Carmilla's, and wow is the world still spinning? Last time Laura held her cheek like this they almost... Laura smoothed out Carmilla's hair again and left her hand to caress her cheek, the other gently placed on Carmilla's shoulder. She stared up in adoration at Laura, who had an unfathomable expression painted on her face. _What is she thinking? What am I thinking?_ Carmilla could feel her heart racing in her chest, and she wasn't sure if she was breathing or not. Her eyes darted to Laura's lips for a moment then back to her eyes. 

No, her heart wasn't racing for reasons you'd think. Her heart was simply racing from the adrenaline of being hurt, her breath was hitching because her body thinks she's in danger from the pain on her cheek, she wants to kiss Laura because she just helped her. It's all platonic. It's not because of the way her lips are quirked into a small smirk, she's not attracted to those warm brown eyes, she definitely is not wondering what it's like to kiss Laura, she's not thinking about how they almost kiss, thinking about how it would feel to kiss her for real, and she's not wondering what her body will feel like against hers- well, she is in a platonic sense. _I like the way she looks... Platonically. I'm emotionally attracted to her... Platonically. She makes me whole in a platonic sense. I'm just turned on because... She, she... She..._

_Oh fuck it._  

Carmilla reached her hand up to tangle in Laura's hair, pulling her into a kiss. Carmilla closed her eyes and she felt as though she might burst. Any voice in the back of her mind was gone the moment their lips touched. She was driven off of a blind need for Laura; her body taking over. She felt Laura's tongue collide with hers, sending her over an edge she didn't know existed. How long has it been since this happened? How many dreams has she had where this happened? How many nights did she spend wondering if this will ever happen again? Oh my god now it's happening, and Carmilla isn't sure she's going to live through this.

_She tastes so sweet..._

Laura released a small moan, igniting the final spark to the fire beginning to burn inside of Carmilla. Laura lowered Carmilla to the ground, and Carmilla knew Laura had complete control over her. She could do anything she wanted to her, she could- Carmilla couldn't finish the thought when Laura grabbed the side of Carmilla's thigh, slowly running her hand down. _She could do that._ Carmilla bit down on Laura's lip, gently tugging her back into a kiss. The feeling of Laura's hand gingerly running down her thigh was unbearable, the way her lips worked against hers becoming torturous, her tongue becoming a drug Carmilla couldn't get enough of. 

"CARMILLA! GROCERIES!" JP called. Carmilla and Laura's eyes shot open and they realized their position. Immediately, they darted away from each other. Both of their chests were heaving as they panted from the abrupt kiss. _Am I gonna have a heart attack?_ Carmilla clenched her chest, trying to make sure her heart wasn't going to explode. Carmilla looked to Laura, who was looking back with the same panic. JP stood at the entrance of the living room with two paper bags filled to the brink in goods.

"Oh. Hey... You?" JP said, his eyes darting between the two girls. Carmilla smiled as best as she could manage at JP, slowly regaining her stamina.

"This is Laura." Carmilla said, gesturing to the caramel-haired girl. JP placed the groceries on the kitchen counter, a knowing smirk on tugging at the corner of his lips. She's going to have to try harder to get herself together, because he totally knows.

"Hi." Laura greeted with a shy wave. "Uh, do you need help with unpacking those?" She asked, gesturing to the large, brown paper bags sitting on the marble kitchen counter. Carmilla made her infamous death glare at JP, only encouraging his smirk. He perked up a bit. _Don't you dare, JP._

"You know what? That'd be great!" JP said with a large smile. Laura pushed herself off the ground and dusted off her hands. JP stuck his tongue out to Carmilla before Laura could notice, and she flipped him off as Laura's back was turned to her.

"So what was happening when I was gone?" JP asked as he started to unpack the groceries. _Oh you evil, evil child._ Laura chuckled nervously and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear, joining JP as she unpacked the groceries.

"Talking. A lot of talking. That's all- just talking." Laura responded.

"Ah. A lot of tongue required for that?" JP said nonchalantly. Laura stilled. Carmilla felt as though she was watching a train wreck happening before her; does she play the hero, or does she sit back and watch? She spotted the way Laura's cheeks were completely red. Well, she's always been more of a villain anyway.

"For talking." Laura retaliated. JP moved to put some groceries in the fridge.

"Of course. I never said it was used for something different." Laura stilled again. Carmilla dragged her tongue across the top row of her teeth. She knows he's grinning widely, taking victory in the small, unmindful confessions from Laura. _I'm going to kill this boy. I swear to the god I don't believe in._ But she was too curious to see what he'd say and what Laura will do next to put a stop to it. 

"Right, right." She said, blinking rapidly.

"It's interesting, isn't it? How weird our thoughts can turn." He paused, and Carmilla knew he was onto something.

"You know," JP started, and leaned against one of the counters, "I actually read this study. So they had they had two groups of women and told them they'd be auditioning for a role. The first group sat by themselves, while the second group was sat with a flirtatious, attractive male. They told each woman to go outside and meet them around the block. However," he hopped up on the counter, his legs slightly swinging- _that's his_ _mischievous look- fuck_ , "outside, there would be a woman carrying much too many items. Now, it was interesting at what they found. They found that the women who were with the attractive male actually went out of there way to help the woman, but the ones who were alone did not. Now, you just think that what, the women who were alone were just cruel? No, not at all actually. What they found was that, once those love chemicals start kicking in a woman's brain, and you know the whole entire lust thing starts as well, that they are actually more nurturing. Meaning they are more willing to be helpful and caring to those around them." Laura froze again. "They believe that it has to do with, you know, men having to look for a woman whose caring so they can nurture a baby back in the caveman days. So women do it sub-consciously to attract a mate. It's weird what lust can make someone do." JP grabbed a banana. "Anyway, thanks for offering to help me with the groceries. I'm sure it was just you being kind." And with that, JP hopped off the counter and glided to his room.

Carmilla face palmed. Why did she have to get stuck with a know it all? She lifted her gaze to see Laura still frozen, and she had to stifle her chuckle. _I swear if Laura wasn't looking so cute right now, I'd kill him._ Laura started unpacking the groceries, finishing off the first bag. Carmilla bit her lip, unsure of whether she should say something or not. Or maybe she should just threaten JP- that might be easier. She can't just leave Laura to do all the work, but it's going to be incredibly awkward to help her. Carmilla had to stop herself from groaning. Why did she have to be such a nice person?

Carmilla walked into the kitchen and started moving groceries to the fridge and to the cabinets, an agonizing awkward silence hanging between them. Laura cleared her throat.

"He seems nice." She muttered quietly. Carmilla pressed her lips into a hard line and nodded.

"Mhm." She replied. The space between the kitchen island and the counters were small, causing for the occasional accidental touch, which caused both girls to jump away. After a while they cleared out the kitchen, and for the first time Carmilla was upset she didn't have anymore work to do. Because now they had to deal with what just happened- or at least, the aftermath of it. 

 

**Laura**

 

Really, she doesn't think she's been more uncomfortable in her life. Her roommate literally just called them out, then left them to finish the work. And now, there's no excuse not to talk. Laura's mind was racing with things to say, but all she could think about was the fact the she basically just made out with Carmilla. They stood awkwardly in the middle of the kitchen, looking at anywhere but each other. Laura fidgeted with her hands and stared down at them.

Who even initiated that kiss? Sure, Carmilla grabbed the back of her head. But Laura leant down and pulled Carmilla to her, right? Her hand was on her cheek, or was she pulled down? What would have happened if JP didn't walk in? Did they really just kiss? No, no that happened. Laura wishes that JP never walked in, but she wasn't sure if it was to save herself of the embarrassment, or if she just wanted to continue whatever the hell just happened.

"So." Carmilla said, breaking the silence. Laura lifted her head to look at Carmilla. Carmilla was wearing long-sleeved black shirt and purple jeans accompanied by a necklace. Carmilla rolled her sleeves up to her elbows, and Laura really wishes she didn't do that. Laura bit her lip, and quickly fended off the thoughts she was having.

"Um, do you know when the others are gathering around?" _Gathering around? My god, Hollis._ Carmilla shook her head and crossed her arms. _Oh, please don't do that._ Laura could see the muscles flex in Carmilla's forearms, and yeah she thinks she was still turned on and this was not helping.

"I've no clue." She needs to call someone- anyone. But how does she do that without making it seem like she wants to leave? 

"Do you mind if I call Laf real quick? I forgot to tell them I left early." Carmilla nodded.

"Oh, yeah. Of course. I'll just uh, go in JP's room." Laura put on her best smile as Carmilla made her way to a room connected to the living room, then closing the door behind her. Laura took a deep breath and dialed Laf, standing as far as she could in the kitchen counter. _Please, please pick up._

"Hey L. Where are you?" Laura sighed out of relief and held her palm to her forehead.

"I'm at Carmilla's. Look, okay long story short I came by early, and then we- well. Like something happened we might have kissed or something and then her roommate came home and now I'm standing in her kitchen and I'm freaking out!" Laura could literally feel Laf process what Laura just said. She could almost hear the gears working in their brain.

"I'm... I'm sorry, what?" Laura huffed.

"Come on, don't make me repeat that." Laura pleaded, pressing her forehead to the marble counter, but then picked it up. If Carmilla works at a bookstore and JP is a student, then how does she afford all this? Isn't this kind of expensive? Laura shook her head. Nope, not important right now. Put that in the file of things to investigate.

"Oh... OH. Okay, so when you... So you totally... And then you... Okay. So instead of, I don't know, call me crazy. But instead of talking to her, you shooed her away and called me?" Laura blinked a few times.

"Oh my god I'm such an idiot!" Laura exclaimed. 

"Chill crushes-on-childhood-friends. I'll get there as soon as I can." Laura huffed out a breath.

"I don't-" Laura shook her head. She'll just let it go for now; she needs them to save her. "Thank you, Laf."

"Good luck Hollis." Laura hung up, and left her phone on the counter. _This is terrible. What the hell do I do?_

 

**Carmilla**

 

As soon as JP saw Carmilla enter his room he jumped, his pleased grin immediately clearing from his expression. She slowly shut the door behind her, and glared at him with a murderous look. She could strangle him, but yet again she needs answers. 

"You mind telling me what the hell that little stunt was?" Carmilla growled, irritation taking over. The smirk slowly returns.

"Do you mind telling me what you guys were doing?" He rallied, placing his hands behind his head and easing back onto the bed. Carmila blushed and looked away for a moment.

"That's not the point." She snapped back. JP crossed his ankles and released a content sigh.

"You know, I knew something was fishy when I shouted and you didn't reply. Then, you greeted me normally- and with a smile. I would have maybe thought you were just trying to show off to her, until I saw both of you breathing heavy. But what really gave it away was when she offered to help me- and knowing she's gay I knew that I didn't set off her little love chemicals. So what's the scoop, Karnstein?" She narrowed her eyes at him and crossed her arms.

"Don't make her uncomfortable." Carmilla threatened. He held his hands up in a truce, and Carmilla rolled her eyes. "Look, we might have... Kissed or something. I don't know- don't be a dick about it."

"I'm not being a dick. I was simply making an observation." Carmilla rolled her eyes again and leaned against the door. "So you did kiss, huh?" Carmilla shifted her jaw side to side.

"Something like that." Carmilla replied, running a hand through her hair. God, this was insane. She kissed girls all the time. She was never one to kiss and tell, nor freak out about it. Hell, she's slept with more girls than her own age. It was just a kiss. But it was with Laura Hollis.

"You know," JP sat up a little on his bed, "I think that's a pretty good sign that she _probably_ has non-platonic feelings for you too." Her heart fluttered.

"It's all platonic." Carmilla suddenly snapped back. He smirked and nodded his head.

"Sure it is." Carmilla rolled her eyes for the third time in the past 10 seconds- she really needs to keep track of that.

"Whatever. What do I do?" Despite her anger, she still needed his help. JP shrugged.

"You know, I think a good idea on where to start is to _actually_ talk to her." Carmilla rolled her eyes out of habit. "She's probably waiting for you out there, so go on. Shoo." Carmilla pursed her lips. As much as she hated to admit this, but he's right. Running away won't fix anything. Judging by his look, he knows that she thinks he's right. She needs to wipe that look off his face.

"You suck." Carmilla settled with.

"Depends if I go to a gay bar or not." Carmilla grunted. There's no way she'll win with him. Admitting her defeat, Carmilla flipped him off and exited the room, making sure to be loud enough so that if Laura was still on the phone, she'd know Carmilla was there. Carmilla was surprised to see Laura on the couch with Mircalla on her lap, mindlessly stroking through her fur.

_Mircalla is seriously the best wingman ever._

Carmilla watched as Laura was completely mesmerized by the cat, her hand stroking up and down. Mircalla only slept on people she trusted, and on account of her being a cat and all, she didn't trust many people, so this was truly an adorable sight. Carmilla smiled, and sat next to Laura on the couch, making sure to keep a few inches between them. She propped her elbows on her knees and clasped her hands together, letting her chin rest on her thumbs. What does she say now? Does she address the elephant in the room? Or maybe she should just address the cat in the room...

"She really likes you, you know." Carmilla muttered, watching as Laura scratched behind the cat's ears. A small smile played on her lips.

"Really?" Carmilla nodded. 

"Mhm. She doesn't really sleep on people's laps- well if she doesn't trust them anyway. So she really does like you." _And so do I._ Carmilla shook away the thought. The cat purred and nuzzled in closer into Laura's lap, looking content. 

"Well I really like the cat." Laura replied, flashing Carmilla a smile. Carmilla chuckled. "How long have you had her?" 

"About two years. JP and I got her from a rescue shelter." And that was a lie- she got her two years ago from Mattie. But Laura didn't need to know about that.

"Oh. Cool." A few more moments of uncomfortable silence passed by. Well, at least they had some sort of a distraction. Thank god for Mircalla. Honestly, Carmilla doesn't know where she'd be without the cat.

"She really likes it when you pet right," Carmilla boldly moved her hand under the cats chin, gently scratching, "there." The cat started to purr and rub her head against Carmilla's hand. There hands touched for a brief moment, but Carmilla pretended as though she didn't notice. _Did she feel that too? Or am I imagining things now?_ Carmilla wondered, feeling an electricity pulse between them. Laura giggled as the cat started kneading her paws through her dress, and Carmilla thinks she has never heard anything more pure.

"She's such a sweetheart." Laura muttered. Carmilla smiled as the girl stared down at the cat, seeming to be entranced.

"I told you so." Carmilla froze for a moment when Laura rested her head on her shoulder. She looked down at Laura, who was still mesmerized by the cat. She's done this plenty of times over the past few weeks- why is this different to Carmilla now? Oh right- because of that... _Thing_. Should she say something? Or will that scare her off? God, she's Carmilla Karnstein for goodness sake! She's the queen of confrontation. Carmilla opened her mouth to speak, but was rudely interrupted when a loud knock came from the door. Carmilla and Laura automatically parted.

"It's open!" Carmilla called from the couch, rising up out of it. She leaned against the reeling and watched as Lafontaine entered. "JP! COME OUT HERE!" Carmilla shouted after exchanging a wave between her and Lafontaine. 

"I'M COMING!"

"GROSS!"

"NOT THAT KIND YOU," JP exited his room, "pervert." Lafontaine walked up the stairs and shared a knowing glance with JP. "Oh, hey. I know you." 

"Hey. I know you too." They laughed and waved, and Carmilla relaxed a bit. Now she won't have to deal with the intimate/awkward moments shared between her and Laura.

 

**Danny**

 

"Babe! Come on!" Kirsch said, tugging at Danny's hand. The sign said to not walk yet, but there were no passing cars. It was a quiet day, but Kirsch was loud enough to remove any silence for the next 30 years. She rolled her eyes.

"Fine. But if we get hit by a car it's totally your fault." Kirsch smiled and tugged her across the street. Danny's eyes darted back and forth to make sure no cars were going to kill them. They crossed the street safely, and Kirsch wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"See? We didn't die. I told you so." Danny wrapped her arm around Kirsch's waist.

"This time. But maybe we won't get so lucky next time."

"Look, if we die, you can punch me all you want." Danny scoffed.

"That doesn't- that isn't..." Danny closed her eyes for a brief moment and shook her head. _Just let it go, Danny._ "Okay." Kirsch kissed Danny's cheek and suddenly she wasn't so annoyed anymore.

"I'm so excited to see her! What do you think she's like now? Oh, I know I know I know! What if she's some... Some kind of ninja? Or an international super spy?" Kirsch said, bouncing around a bit.

"I'm pretty sure Laura said she worked at a bookstore..." Danny murmured.

"Yeah but that could be for cover. You can't just say you're an international super spy. That's like, common knowledge." Danny smiled and looked up to Kirsch for a second.

"And how do you know I'm not some international super spy?" Kirsch hummed, deep in thought for a moment. The way this guy's brain worked never failed to surprise nor amaze Danny. Sometimes she kicks herself in the ass for falling for someone like this, but most of the time she's glad.

"Because then you'd have to pretend to love me. And you're not pretending- right babe?" Danny pressed her lips into a hard line to hide her smile. Kirsch looked down at her with a bit of panic. "Babe?" Danny couldn't stifle her smile anymore and she broke out into a chuckle.

"Kidding!" Kirsch slapped his chest.

"Don't do that! You're gonna give a bro a heart attack." Danny laughed and watched as Kirsch recovered.

"You're an idiot sometimes, you know that?" 

"Yeah, but I'm your idiot." Danny rolled her eyes.

Honestly- why did she have to fall for such a dork?

 

**JP**

 

JP sat on the floor cross-legged, his elbows propped up on his knees, his hands clasped in front of his face as forefingers rested on his lips. He was observing Laura and Carmilla together, trying to piece together something between the two. Carmilla couldn't have just said that they kissed so he would leave her alone- no. At the very least the two are absolutely attracted to each other- no doubt about that. They're mirroring each other's body movements, holding eye contact longer than 5 seconds, showing their necks... 

He looked to Lafontaine, who was making some sort of a pun.

They have to see this too, right? Their smart enough to see this- he can't be the only one. Then again, he's the only one to pick up on things a lot of times. Being a genius was hard sometimes. Maybe Lafontaine did notice though, because why would they come early? Laura must have texted or called them at some point. Lafontaine, always there for their friends, had to have rushed here. No, something must have happened between Carmilla and Laura, otherwise they wouldn't have came here without Perry. He's seen the way they talk about her- there's no chance they would have came here without Perry unless Laura gave them a reason to.

His eyes darted back to Carmilla and Laura.

He knows he told her not to, but what if he just ran a couple tests? His hypotheses were killing him- especially at the fact that he can't test them without Carmilla wigging out on him- but it's only a defensive reaction because she feels threatened. Why? Another hypothesis added, another one he was just itching to test out. 

But how can he get away with it?

He can't. There's no way Carmilla would allow him to do anything, and she knows all his tricks... Isn't there something he can do? There has to be. He only has reasonable suspicion to something happening between Carmilla and Laura... But yet again they've acted this way since they first reconnected. He knows briefly of what occurred between the two girls, and Laura keeps looking from Carmilla's eyes to below her neck- another sign of attraction. God, this was a slow, painful death to JP. 

He wants whats best for Carmilla; he always has. She's like a younger sister to him, and he wants to watch over her. Sometimes she cant handle herself, so he does his best to do it for her- discreetly of course. He'd never hear the end of it if she found out all the he does for her. 

But Laura seems trustworthy enough- no, she's completely genuine. It's clear she cares deeply for Carmilla; it's past a physical attraction. And he hasn't seen Carmilla smile that wide since she was with Ell... And he knows thats where this overprotectiveness lies with him about this whole thing. He doesn't want to see her hurt like that. She fucked her up- and she fucked her up bad. Laura needs to know of Carmilla's past, but it's not his place to say anything. This has to come from Carmilla... But it's hard for him to fight the urge to stand in front of Carmilla and protect her. With how happy she looks around Laura- he'd hate for something terrible to happen, because Carmilla can never seem to catch a break. 

He sighed and leaned back on his palms. Carmilla made some comment, causing Laura to laugh. JP watched the small smirk that happened on Carmilla's face as she took victory in making Laura laugh. 

He'd just have to prevent her from fucking up for now.

 

**Laura**

 

It's been about two hours since the... _Incident._ Everyone was there now. Somewhere in the hours they all pushed the table out of the way and decided to sit in a circle on the floor. They had music playing in the background off the TV. They couldn't decide between classic rock, indie, or pop, so they ended up going with some alternative station. Empty beer bottles and cups were scattered about, the childhood friends taking turns reminiscing about old times. Laura had Camilla to her right and JP to her left, who was surprisingly silent most of the night. She got the feeling that he was watching her, but had too much alcohol in her system to care. Lafontaine grabbed the bottle that became known as the "talking bottle", meaning if you had it, it was your turn to share an old childhood memory. 

"Okay, okay guys I got one." They pressed their hand on their knee and swayed a bit. "Town Day. These two," Lafontaine gestured between Laura and Carmilla, "made kissy kissy." If Laura's cheeks weren't already red from the alcohol they sure as hell were now. She gave them the death glare, causing them to giggle. 

"No way! You bros kissed?" Kirsch said, astonished. Perry joined Lafontaine's giggle, and Laura felt the heat reach her neck.

"Yeah." Laura squeaked out. Curious of her reaction, Laura peeped at Carmilla stealthily out of the corner of her eye. (Seriously, she should be an FBI Agent- she's so sneaky). Laura was shocked at seeing Carmilla. _Was Carmilla... Embarrassed?_ Her cheeks were slightly tinted red, her eyebrows strained, and she was chewing on her bottom lip. Laura couldn't tell what Carmilla was feeling, but she knew she's never seen Carmilla look that way. So, Laura shoved aside her own bashfulness and decided to take the pressure off of her drunken friend.

"No biggie though. We were like," Laura pinched her thumb and forefinger together, "this big. We were tiny little kids back then." Laura leaned back on her palms. "Actually Kirsch, what were you doing on Town Day?" Kirsch grinned and looked at Danny.

"Holding hands with this one." He said, nudging Danny with his elbow. Danny blushed slightly and sneered at him, and they started to half bicker, half talk lovey-dovey with each other. Good. She got the pressure off of Carmilla- she thinks. Laura turned to look at Carmilla to see her staring down at her crossed legs, her hands fidgeting. _Aw, oh my gosh. She looks like a lost kitten. Is she always this adorable?_ Laura nudged Carmilla with her shoulder, smiling widely at her. Carmilla lifted her gaze to Laura and smiled shyly back. 

"You good?" Laura mouthed. Carmilla nodded, and Laura smiled again. She really had no excuse to look at her now, but she couldn't pry her eyes away from her. Her eyes are so dark, but so full of light. Laura wonders how Carmilla does it; and how she manages to look so stunning. _I can't believe I kissed her- twice. Or, thrice. Or, technically, multiple times. Can I do it again?_ A loud laugh from Kirsch reminds her that there are other people in the room, and she's snapped out of her daze. Laura looked back to the group and rejoined the conversation. _Gonna pretend I never had that thought._

Another hour zoomed by between the drunken group, and at this time things were getting a little crazy. Everyone was up and dancing by the time Sacrilege by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs came on- that was nearly an half hour ago. Danny and Kirsch were currently fighting over the remote, Kirsch trying to dance while they did, Lafontaine doing an awkward sway, and Perry, JP and Carmilla, in their own mini mosh pit. Laura stood there and watched the group, laughing to herself. Kirsch flipped on the Pop station and held the remote high above his head.

"Oh come on, this song sucks!" Danny exclaimed, trying to reach for the remote.

"Nah man- this is a classic!"

"One Direction is not a classic!" Danny barked back, trying to climb up Kirsch's arms. Kirsch tossed the remote on the couch and grabbed Danny by the hand, using the other to wrap around her waist.

"Everybody wanna steal my girl!" He belted out along with the song.

"This is terrible." Danny replied as Kirsch forced her to dance with him.

"Everybody wanna take her heart away!" He started moving around the room with her, and Danny couldn't hide the giggle. They continued like that, Kirsch acting like a goof while Danny failed to hide her smiles and laughs. Laura smiled to herself and watched the whole thing go down. In some weird way, they were perfect for each other.

Laura looked to the mosh pit happening, watching as JP, Perry, and Carmilla threw their bodies together and raved. She chuckled. Perry was a completely different person with alcohol in her system- and boy oh boy was it entertaining. Laura watched Carmilla, how her hair flew every which way, her body flinging around and smashing into others. How can she manage to look beautiful even when she's in a mosh pit?

The song came to a close, and then Promiscuous Girl started to play. Laura and Carmilla met gazes, and suddenly Laura felt all warm inside. Carmilla's eyes darkened, and a smirk played on her lips. There was something dancing behind her eyes as she stared at Laura, and it made herfrozen in place. The trance was broken when Carmilla grabbed Laura's hand.

"Dance with me!" She exclaimed, tugging Laura into the fiasco. Carmilla's hands moved to Laura's hips, and Laura draped her arms over Carmilla's shoulders. Perry was jumping and pelvic thrusting Lafontaine, who kept trying to scurry away. Kirsch and Danny were still waltzing about the room, arguing over Pop music, and JP...

Where'd he go?

Laura didn't have the capacity to finish the thought as Carmilla started pressing their hips together, both dancing against each other. Carmilla's hands started wandering about Laura's lower back, and she bit her lip. Carmilla stared wickedly into her eyes, and Laura felt entranced. What is she thinking? Carmilla's lips curled into a menaced smirk, completely distracted by Laura. Laura moved her hips in Carmilla's hands as they moved their bodies against each other in a rhythm.

It didn't take long for Laura to loose her breath, because wow Carmilla was really good with her hands, and her hips, and do her eyes always look like that? She felt her heart accelerate, her body sparking alive. Laura's intentions quickly turned dark, feeling bold with the alcohol in her system. 

Screw it.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla couldn't look away from Laura as she bit her lip, feeling the way her hips worked in her hands, against her body. Theres something so... Sexual, about her. Carmilla could only drink in the sight of Laura, the feeling of her. She liked what was happening, and the alcohol invading her system was making her bolder than she thought she could be. The music only added to this affect, making her feel like she was on some sort of ecstasy. Laura leaned in close so her lips were right next to Carmilla's ear.

"I think I left something in the bedroom." Laura whispered, slowly pulling off her sweater. Carmilla watched intently as she dropped her sweater to the floor. This girl was going to be the death of her- wait did she just say the bedroom? 

"Race you." Carmilla challenged. Laura smirked and the two took off to Carmilla's bedroom, trying to shove past each other. Carmilla beat Laura to the door, but Laura got into the bedroom first. Carmilla barely had anytime to react because Laura had her pinned against the door, her hands on Carmilla's hips. Carmilla felt like she was under some sort of spell. _Is Laura a witch?_ Carmilla will have to check that out later.

Carmilla cupped the back of Laura's neck, the other hand moving to her back. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment, both clouded in lust. Laura leaned in to kiss Carmilla, their lips about to reconnect when a banging on the door interrupted them.

"Carmilla! Your phone's going crazy!" She heard JP call from the outside. Whatever spell she was under broke in a moment. The two girls realized what was about to happen, and jumped away from each other. Carmilla turned and opened the door, JP standing there with that what-the-hell-are-you-doing look. _Oh boy._ Carmilla thought. JP motioned her outside and Carmilla followed, Laura rejoining the crowd. 

They stood in the kitchen, and JP crossed his arms, making sure they were far enough away so no one could here.

"Where's my phone?" Carmilla asked, confused at the absence of her technology friend. 

"Sorry for the clitoference, but I'm not letting you screw things up with Laura from a drunken mistake." JP said lowly. Carmilla sighed and rolled her eyes.

"We weren't gonna do anything." Carmilla was a terrible liar; always has been. And this was no different. JP cocked his eyebrows and narrowed his eyes at her.

"You'll thank me eventually." Carmilla scoffed and moved back to the crowd. At this time, a Justin Timberlake song was playing, and there was no way in hell she'd ever grind to a JT song. JP got lucky with her change of heart, and everyone cooled it with the dancing and started talking again. (But what would've happened if JP didn't stop them? Carmilla can only wonder in secret).

Slowly, one by one everyone piled out. Kirsch stepping into be Danny's "dude-scort" (which Carmilla thought was hilarious. Has he ever considered being a comedian?), and Laf, less drunk the crowd, promised to keep Laura and Perry in check while they walked back home. 

It was left with Carmilla, JP, and Mircalla. Not wanting to be patronized by JP again, Carmilla decided to go to bed, not bothering to change out of her clothes. She'll think about tonight later on. Right now, it's nearly 2 in the morning and she's exhausted.

Maybe she'll see Laura again in her dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so fun fact that whole entire "lust makes women more nurturing" thing JP said is true. I'm a nerd and watched a lot of documentaries on the brain and how humans interact and what not, so that whole little gig is accurate.  
> Thanks for your comments and kudos!


	14. Trouble in Paradise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANGST. Danny just fucks it up. Fucks it all up. Completely bamboozles it.

**Laura**

 

Laura awoke with a raging headache; her head throbbing and pounding as though someone was repeatedly hitting a hammer to a nail. God, she's never drinking again. Laura didn't have the patience to reconfigure her blaring alarm clock, instead just tore out the plug and let it drop. Laura groaned and moved her hands to her head.

Jesus, how much had she drank? What happened last night? Party, Carm, going early- the _incident_ \- Laf arriving, Perry, Kirsch, Danny... Drinking, talking, Carm, dancing, oh god dancing. Did she really grind with Carm last night? God, she's a hot mess when she's drunk. Laura did her best to ignore the fact she actually kissed her when she wasn't sober.

Laura rolled off of her bed and slowly got out, her head pounding. _Oh, come on head. Just handle your alcohol._ Laura moved to the bathroom and turned on the shower, feeling gross and groggy.

_I need to get myself together._

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Lafontaine stretched their arms over their head, looking down at a hung over Perry. They smiled. Even when she's hung over, she's the most beautiful girl Lafontaine has ever seen.

"Can you not move so much?" Perry groaned. Lafontaine laughed and rubbed their girlfriend's arm.

"Get up Perr. It's 9AM." But she didn't budge. "Come on. If you don't get up, I'll make the breakfast." Perry jumped out of the bed, hissing at the pain of moving too fast. Her hand went to her head as she reconfigured herself.

"No, no. I'll do it." Lafontaine laughed as Perry lugged herself out of their bedroom and to the kitchen. Last time Lafontaine cooked, they got too interested in the fire and almost set their room ablaze. Yeah, Lafontaine wasn't allowed to cook after that.

They ran their hand through their hair before crawling out of bed. Laura didn't drink that much more than Lafontaine, and any normal person wouldn't be affected too much the morning after. But Laura Hollis is tiny and extreme light weight. So, the aftermath should be interesting. 

Lafontaine brushed their teeth before hobbling out into the kitchen, taking in the smell of eggs and toast. They took a seat at the kitchen table and drank their coffee already made for them. _Honestly, Perry is the best_. They were taking in the serenity of the morning when they heard a knock at the door. Weird. They weren't expecting any guests.

"Can you get that?" Perry asked, moving gracefully with the pan and wooden spoon in her hands.

"Are you expecting someone?" They asked, arising from their seat and to the door.

"No, are you?"

"No." They exchanged a glance before they opened the door. Their shit-eating grin was automatic when they saw Carmilla standing there. "Well well well, look what the cat dragged in." They teased. Carmilla rolled her eyes.

"You need to change into something with a little less whiff." 

"Are you saying that I smell?" Carmilla shrugged, and Lafontaine laughed. "Well, good morning to you too. What brings you here?" They asked, wiggling their eyebrows. They know all too well that whatever reason Carmilla is here, it has to do with Laura. And they are interested to see the excuse she's brought with her.

"Uh, is Laura here?" _Right again._ Lafontaine crossed their arms and leaned back on their heels.

"Maybe." They replied with their know-it-all stance and their shit-eating grin. Of course Laura was there, but they were not about to make this easy for Carmilla. They enjoyed watching Carmilla admit to having human feelings- or at least showing them. She was sometimes a fun little test subject to Lafontaine.

"Alright move aside Fred Weasley." Carmilla said, shoving past Lafontaine. They laughed and shut the door behind her.

"Oh! Hey Carmilla!" Perry said from the kitchen. Carmilla waved.

"Hey P-Dawg." Carmilla greeted with a nod. Perry threw Carmilla a glare before returning to cooking. Perry was always embarrassed at the drunken side of herself- and refused to acknowledge it most of the time. Lafontaine always loved poking fun at this. They're glad to know someone else does too. "Mind telling me where Laura is?" Perry pointed her wooden spoon to Laura's door.

"Right there." Carmilla nodded and Lafontaine groaned.

"You couldn't let me have my fun?" They said. Perry rolled her eyes, and Carmilla headed to Laura's room. Lafontaine sighed and took their seat back on the kitchen table. Once they made sure Carmilla was in Laura's room, they looked back to Perry. "There's definitely something going on between them, right?" Perry nodded and hummed in agreement.

"Oh it's obvious."

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla closed the door behind her slowly, careful not to wake the sleeping girl. _Wait, what sleeping girl?_ Carmilla spotted that Laura wasn't in her bed. _Did she just disappear? Was Laf not kidding when they said maybe?_ Carmilla's eyes darted around the room some more in search of the tiny girl, standing there clueless.

Carmilla's heart nearly jumped in her throat when she saw Laura appear from her bathroom with a towel tightly wrapped around her. Her skin was still wet, and it glistened in the light seeping through the window. Carmilla could see how toned Laura's arms actually were, and how perfectly structured her shoulders were as well. Laura's hair was still damp from the shower, and it was riled up. She looked incredibly beautiful in that moment to Carmilla, and she almost forgot that Laura didn't know she was there until she spotted Carmilla.

Laura squealed, and Carmilla thought she might die because for a moment, it looked like Laura might drop her towel. But she hung onto it tightly before it could drop. Carmilla darted her eyes to the floor, using her hand to shield them away from Laura. 

"Oh- god sorry." Carmilla said, keeping her eyes trained to the wooden floor.

"Carmilla! What are you doing here?" Laura replied, shuffling through her clothing.

"I- I just." Carmilla held out the sweater Laura left in her apartment. "You left this at my place. Perry said you were in here." Laura paused for a moment, then took the sweater.

"Oh um... Thanks." Carmilla nodded, unsure what to do next.

"It's a cute sweater." Carmilla managed to say, tracing the dark blue carpet with her eyes.

"Yeah. I got it recently." The moment was starting to become intense when the memories of last night flashed through Carmilla's head. She must remember too, right? Was she that drunk? Carmilla was drunk, but she remembered. Was Laura the same? "So it's like 9 in the morning; don't you have some aching hangover like the rest of us?" Laura said, the moment dying down again. Carmilla heard the girl's towel drop, and knew she was getting changed. Carmilla gulped nervously.  _Is she seriously going to let me stand here while she changes?_

"I don't get hangovers. Karnstein specialty." Carmilla replied. Which was true- she never did. Her mother never did. Carmilla shook the thought of her mother away. She didn't want to get depressed. Her brother never got hangovers, and neither did her sister. She supposes it's some sort of lucky gene- or maybe a phenomenon. Laura scoffed.

"Holy hell. Do you always have to be perfect in literally everything?" Laura retaliated. Carmilla's heart skipped a beat.  _Perfect? Did she just call me perfect?_  Carmilla lifted her gaze to see Laura staring back at her, only wearing a long shirt and underwear. Carmilla's eyes raked over her body before meeting her gaze again. Carmilla wasn't used to compliments- I mean sure besides the usual comment on her physical appearance. But this...

_Perfect?_

Carmilla never thought of herself as perfect- the opposite actually. She thought of herself as ruined, or spoiled. And the fact that it came from Laura... Their eyes locked and suddenly the atmosphere changed around them, and the room felt stuffy. There was too much space between them; they weren't close enough. Laura wasn't close enough to Carmilla. But Carmilla had enough self control to look back to the floor. She wasn't going to make things awkward- again.

"Um... You can... You can look, you know." Carmilla's heart started racing, and she felt her palms become sweaty. God, she's acting like she did when she was a teen. What was wrong with her? She's just a- Carmilla's thoughts dissipated when she looked back to Laura, who still stood there with nothing but a loose, light blue button up shirt and hot pink underwear. She felt heat rush to her cheeks as the moment intensified, Laura's warm brown eyes staring deep into hers. Carmilla's thoughts raced through her mind as her heart pounded. She couldn't believe how absolutely stunning the girl was before her, and how she got lucky to so much as to stand in the same room as the goddess before her. Carmilla's eyes raked over Laura's body again, remembering her features before they locked eyes. She became transfixed in the warm brown as that stared into hers, dragging her into a trance.

"You're beautiful, Laura." She said before she could stop herself.

 

**Laura**

 

"I don't get hangovers. Karnstein specialty." Laura rolled her eyes and scoffed as she slid on her bra. This girl seriously has to be some sort of a goddess- or at least Laura thinks. She started to button up her shirt.

"Holy hell. Do you always have to be perfect in literally everything?" Laura stilled as the words exited her mouth. Did she just say that? She didn't mean to say that, she didn't mean to just compliment her- especially when she's nearly half naked while Carmilla is standing in her room. Carmilla lifted her shy gaze from the floor, and eyed Laura up and down. Laura would be lying if she said her heart didn't race when she spotted this, but everything seemed to stop when Carmilla locked eyes with her. Her dark eyes softened, and she seemed so vulnerable then- grateful even. But her eyes darted back down, and Laura immediately missed the stare.

"Um..." Laura swallowed past a lump forming in her throat. "You can... You can look you know." Laura said bashfully. Carmilla looked back to her, and Laura felt herself blush. This time, there was no excuse for her actions. There was no alcohol in her system to blame, no poison moving past her lips to atone for her actions. No drug to accuse for what she was feeling, what she was doing. 

"You're beautiful, Laura." Carmilla muttered. Laura's heart started pounding. The space between them felt too much; like there was a wall between them. It was easy to tear down- all it took was a couple of steps. Laura found her feet glued to the floor. What was wrong with her? Why was she feeling this way? Laura's breath hitched when Carmilla took a step forward. Why is her heart beating like this? Another step forward. Why does it matter so much more that Carmilla called her beautiful? People told her before, why does it matter so much now? Another slow, step. She's never ached so much for someone to touch her, never longed for it more than she does now.

Carmilla was now standing in front of Laura, her dark eyes gazing deeply into her own. There were only inches between them. She could see as the raven-haired girl was breathing heavy, her eyes wild with desire. Laura couldn't move- not in fear, not because she didn't want to, but because for some reason she couldn't; her body wouldn't move. Carmilla's intense gaze held her in position. Up close, Laura could see how deep Carmilla's eyes were, a wall slowly falling behind them. She could see how touchable her pale skin looked, how perfectly structured her cheekbones turned out with a jawline molded by the gods. 

Laura absent-mindedly reached her hand up and touched Carmilla's cheek. Her skin was smooth and cheekbones rigid. Laura trailed her hand down to Carmilla's jaw. She can't believe how stunning Carmilla looked; and how she got to touch her just then. Carmilla leaned into Laura's touch. Laura slowly grazed her hand to Carmilla's slightly parted lips, letting her forefinger rest on her bottom lip. Carmilla kissed her fingertip, and Laura became more entranced. She glided her hand back down to Carmilla's jaw, tracing along the structure. A sudden loud banging on the door interrupted them.

"Laura! You ready to go?" Carmilla and Laura jumped away from each other. Carmilla ran a hand through her hair, their eyes still not able to tear away from each other.

"Yeah! I'm ready!" Laura called back. They eyed each other for a moment, trying to decipher what just happened.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Perry shot them a look, but they shrugged. They weren't about to be late to class so Laura and Carmilla could get their freak on.

 

**Laura**

 

Hours later and Laura found herself sitting in class, her laptop sitting perched open as the teacher spewed out things she couldn't focus on. Again, Carmilla had snaked her way into Laura's thoughts, consuming them like a parasite taking over it's host.

Laura looked around the classroom and sighed.

Some students were sleeping, others chatting quietly, some on their laptops, and some were actually paying attention and taking notes. All these people, and all Laura can focus on is Carmilla. What was going on with Laura anyway? What's going on with Carmilla? What's going on between them? They're just childhood friends who recently reconnected... Right? But if that's all then why can't Laura stay away? Why can't she stop thinking about her? Why is it every time they're together, they gravitate towards each other like magnets? Laura sighed.

She knows why, but she's not going to admit that to herself. She knows Carmilla doesn't feel the same, and she's probably just trying to bang her or some other reason like that. Laura's not about to let herself get into another heartbreak. Carmilla's told her that she hasn't really had any relationships, just hook ups. Laura knows that Carmilla doesn't feel the same.

But theres just something about her...

Laura knows she shouldn't pry into Carmilla's life, but the inner journalist inside of her was throwing a tangent to do so. She works at a library, and lives with a student. How can she afford such a nice apartment like that with her situation? How has someone as beautiful as her not get into at least one relationship? What about Will? What ever happened to him? Laura never knew him well; just knew he existed. What about Carmilla's mother? Why doesn't she ever talk about her life? And how did she meet JP? Laura sighed.

There's so much to know about Carmilla, and the fact that she remains such a mystery to Laura only intrigued her more. It's odd how she's a mystery when she knew her for so long, and as the days go by that they reconnect, their friendship only rekindles.

_Friendship._

Can Laura even call it that? When she makes her heart race and her body ache? They've already crossed the territory when they... Kissed. In Carmilla's apartment. Did that even mean anything to Carmilla? Is Laura the only one that felt something when they did? Is she the only one that can't stop thinking about it every time they're together? Are they still even considered friends?

_No._

Too many intimate things have happened between them for it to be considered so. Right? Laura's heart started to race again when she thought of last night. They were literally grinding on each other, and they went to her bedroom to... Laura sighed. To what? What would have happened if JP didn't so rudely interrupt? What would have happened this morning if Lafontaine didn't knock on the door? So many questions left unanswered, so many what ifs that can't be known.

Laura sighed, and Betty nudged her arm.

"Alright, girly. You've been sighing every 20 seconds like clockwork." Betty said, her eyes trained on her own laptop. "What's bothering you today?" Laura was about to sigh again, but stopped herself. Betty's right; she was sighing a lot.

"It's just..." She closed her laptop and looked to Betty. "Would two people still be considered friends if they kissed?" Betty's eyes peeled from the laptop and stared widely at Laura.

"Did you and that broody gay finally..." Laura nodded, and Betty closed her laptop. "Shut up! No way!" She squealed, earning a few hushes from students. Betty rolled her eyes at them. "What happened? How did it happen? Tell me everything." She said in a more hushed voice. Laura smiled. She's definitely lucky to have met someone like Betty. Laura told Betty the tale of last night, and decided to include this morning. Betty listened intently. Really, anything was more interesting in this class. What were they even being lectured on today? Laura had no clue.

"So yeah. I'm screwed." She finished off the story.

"Totally screwed." Laura's jaw dropped, expecting comforting words by Betty. She simple grinned. "By Carmilla." Laura rolled her eyes and Betty laughed. "Look, I'm totally kidding. Have you ever considered, I don't know, actually talking about it?" Laura rapidly shook her head.

"Hell no. That's so awkward. Plus I don't feel like getting my heart stomped on, so no thank you." Betty rolled her eyes and huffed.

"So, you have a fuck buddy. So what?" 

"I don't think I just want a fuck buddy with her." Laura admitted bashfully. 

"I think that's as close to a confession that I'm gonna get." Betty said, crossing her arms and leaning back in her chair. "Why don't you just hang out with her alone? You know, get sentimental or whatever you lesbians do." Betty teased. Laura laughed and tossed a crumpled paper at Betty. She dodged the attack and laughed.

"I'll stop by her apartment or something later in the week. I have to finish that lit essay I was telling you about." 

"Good luck." Laura smiled, and started to pay attention to the seminar again, happier now that she talked out her situation. 

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch sat in the cafeteria with Danny, digging into his cheeseburger while Danny sat quietly. He could tell something was wrong with her, but every time he asked what she would get defensive. She'd roll her eyes, and shoot back some comment. Or huff loudly and change the topic. Really, she's doing everything to avoid the question, when something really is wrong. And if only deepened his worry that she's not telling him, when they tell each other everything.

"Alright babe. I've had enough." He swallowed a large bite of his cheeseburger. "Tell me what's wrong. I hate seeing you upset." Danny huffed and threw her head back, her arms crossed.

"It's nothing, Kirsch." Danny replied dully. He sighed. He has to do something- get somewhere in an attempt to help his girlfriend.

"It's clearly something. You haven't even punched my shoulder once today." Kirsch replied. If she wasn't going to tell her what's wrong, he's going to do his best to at least make her smile.

"Maybe you're being less of an idiot today." She bit back, closing her eyes. Okkkayyy. So if not humor, then maybe he can do something else. She always loved playing hero and making people feel secure. Maybe that will work.

"That's impossible. You always think I'm an idiot." He said with fake dismay. Danny shook her head, and looked into his eyes. He put on his best kicked puppy dog look.

"You know that's not true." Danny replied with soft eyes. Kirsch fought back his smile. He loved it when she made those eyes at him. Moments where she actually showed she cared. Kirsch shrugged.

"If you think I'm too dumb to know..." He said, looking down at his food. That was actually an insecurity he was having currently, that she thought he was too unintelligent to handle her problem, or to understand it. 

"Kirsch, that's not it." She placed a hand on his, and he looked back to her.

"Then why won't you tell me what's wrong?" Kirsch said with more hurt in his voice than he intended.

"Awe, babe. It's not a personal thing. It's just..." Danny sighed. "I'm worried about Laura- well Carmilla and Laura." Kirsch cocked an eyebrow. After all these years, they finally reconnect and she's still holding a grudge against her? He waited for her to continue. "There's something up with Carmilla- I know it. She avoids any talk of her personal life, or anything about herself really. And her apartment? There's no way a librarian and a college student can afford that. I just... I know it's ridiculous, but it seems fishy. What if she's a drug lord or something?"

"Or an international super spy." He said with a grin. She shot him a look and he immediately dropped it.

"I'm serious, Kirsch. And there's something happening between them. It's obvious. And I... I don't want to see Laura hurt again. After Alice... She just wasn't the same. You know it too." Kirsch nodded, silently agreeing. After that, Danny and Kirsch always watched over Laura. She couldn't take care of herself for a while, and eventually just dropped everything and travelled Europe. When she got back, she seemed happier. But even then, Kirsch and Danny still watched out for Laura. The relationship was extremely toxic, and just really fucked up altogether. Really screwed with Laura's head, and since then they've silently vowed to protect her. Maybe this is one of those times. "There's something going on with Carmilla, something dark she's not telling us. And Laura seems to be interested in her, and I'm just worried." Kirsch bit his lip. She had a point, and D-bear's like wicked smart. She would know if something was going on.

"So, what do we do?" He asked, looking for her guidance.

"We just need to keep watch of them, you know? Find out about Carmilla, and watch over Laura." He nodded.

"Okay." Kirsch agreed. "You're right now that you mention it. I mean, of course things must have changed some how. It's 8 years. I wouldn't say a drug lord, but there is something totally not cool going on with Carmilla." Danny nodded.

"Thank you for listening, Kirsch." Kirsch kissed Danny's hand, and she grimaced. "I told you to stop doing that." She said with a smile.

"Oh come on. You secretly like it. You and I both know you're a sap at heart." Danny scoffed.

"No way."

"Yeah way." The two went back to their normal bickering, and Kirsch started to wonder more and more about Carmilla.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura sat on her bed, done with the work day. She had her laptop perched up on her lap, mindlessly watching an old episode of Doctor Who while munching on a secret stash of cookies. Perry always tried to find Laura's secret cookies and toss them out, but Laura knew this apartment well enough by now to figure out places where Perry wouldn't look. For example; a box of Cheeze Itz. The old switcharoo.

However, no amount of Doctor Who and delicious cookies could take Laura's mind away from Carmilla. She had tried finishing her lit essay, but to no avail. It's not fair that she's thinking about Carmilla all the time when Carmilla isn't thinking of her. Laura knows the only way to ease the thoughts were to talk to see her. Maybe after that, then she can go back to focusing. Yeah, she'll just stop by her work and go.

She can do that.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla sat on her work chair; feet propped up on the desk as she read some book. The store was surprisingly empty today; only a few customers here and there. Carmilla didn't mind the slow work day however. She wasn't in the mood to deal with a lot of customers today. Not with Laura tainting her mind, consuming her thoughts. What was this book even on again? Carmilla wondered as she realized she had been staring mindlessly at a page. 

Carmilla sighed and placed the book down. Boredom was a weak word to describe her at the moment. She wanted to do something to keep her thoughts of Laura at bay; to do anything really. Carmilla hated that someone could take over her mind so easily, that someone could control her like that, that someone could have as strong of a hold on her like Laura did. What was wrong with her? She's acting like a lovesick teen all over again. Carmilla didn't do romance- she did random girls.

Carmilla sighed and pulled her feet off the desk, rolling her chair away and pushing off of it.

She could just organize the books; she loved doing that. She wished her part-time employee, Theo, was here right now. He was always fun to talk to. He was extremely proper, maybe a little awkward, and Carmilla loved that. They could go hours without talking, and it wasn't uncomfortable. And when they did talk, he always brought up some documentary he watched, or a dorky television show. He could actually hold intelligent conversations despite his age. The kid couldn't be older than 17, and it showed with his baby face. He kind of reminded Carmilla in Will in some ways, and she sometimes thinks that's why she hired him. But he did work hard, and was surprisingly great with customers. As long as he had something to talk about, he wasn't so awkward.

Carmilla was organizing books when she heard three slow knocks on one of the shelves. Carmilla sighed, expecting to see a customer. But when Carmilla turned, she saw her sister. Carmilla smiled wide and threw the book on the shelf.

"Mattie!" She exclaimed, running into her sister's arms and spinning around. "When did you get back in town?" She asked, staring up at her older sister with complete adoration. 

"Last night. And don't you Mattie me you little monster. Not when you haven't bothered to call me." Mattie said, running a finger under Carmilla's chin and brushing back her hair like she always did.

"Sorry about that. My mind has been other places." Carmilla replied, holding Mattie's arms. She missed her sister, and she felt guilty now that she realized she hasn't called her for a few days. 

"Ugh, don't ignore me like that! It's like you're stabbing me with a soul-eating sword." Carmilla smiled and hugged her sister again, in both excitement and in some apology.

"I'll close up early so we can catch up." Mattie smiled, and looked around the shop. Carmilla moved to the door and saw someone running past the store. _Huh. Looks like someones in a hurry._ Carmilla flipped the sign from 'Opened' to 'Closed' and returned to her sister.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura rushed down the street, holding back tears. Laura felt so betrayed, the image of seeing some girl's hands all over Carmilla was making her both furious, and somber. Laura lowered her head and rushed as fast as she could. Laura can't stand it knowing Carmilla has a girlfriend, that she has been playing Laura this whole time. To make matters worse is she lied; she's been lying. This must be where Carmilla's income comes from. Her girlfriend looked rich and powerful- and not to mention extremely stunning. And here was Laura, fighting back tears as she rushed to her apartment. Feeble, tiny, weak Laura.

The familiar ache returned to her heart, causing the tears to spill. It felt like she was reopening old wounds- her heart getting stomped on and tossed away in a wood chipper like it did when she dated Alice. She knew somewhere that this is what this was partially about; the fact that she was hurt. But it still hurt, and Laura still felt like an idiot nonetheless. God, why does she always have to be some naive, provincial girl!

Laura bursted through the lobby and to the stairs, not having the patience for the elevator. She climbed two steps at a time, desperately wanting to just get to the comfort of her apartment. She thinks someone passed her and asked if she was alright, but she wasn't paying attention. She just had to get back; had to get home. Perry was still out working, and Lafontaine was still at the lab. She could be alone- she didn't want them to see her tears.

Laura finally got to her floor and rushed to her door, her hands shaking as she fumbled with the keys. Laura suddenly felt a large hand on her shoulder. She looked up to see Danny, standing there and panting.

"I came by to..." Danny swallowed, trying to regain her breath. "To ask you about the lit essay. Lafontaine said you were home, and I came by and you weren't there. Then I saw you running down the stairs and..." Laura let out a shaky breath, and Danny could tell that she was not okay. "Laura, what's wrong?" Laura ran into Danny's arms and pulled her into a hug. Danny wrapped an arm around Laura's shoulders, using the other to take her key and insert it into her apartment door for her. Danny shoved it open and guided Laura in, who was still trying to fight tears. She felt embarrassed to cry; ashamed and bashful. She needed some adult to take care of her because she was too weak to do it herself. 

Danny sat them down on the couch and rubbed Laura's back, patiently waiting for her to talk. Laura stared at the floor for a moment, not wanting to talk about it. But Danny was persistent; she always has been. And if Laura didn't tell her what was wrong, she'd never hear the end of it. Plus, she needed to vent about this. She knew most of the pain was because of that same pain she felt those years ago from her ex, and that it was her re-living it. But she also knew the pain also came from Carmilla, and she couldn't ignore that.

"I saw... Carmilla... She has a girlfriend." Laura looked up to Danny, who's jaw was clenched and fire in her eyes. Danny was always over protective of Laura, and Laura hated it. But now... Right now she was glad that she had someone sharing her same anger.

"I knew something was up with her." Danny said, balling her hand into a fist. Laura was taken aback.

"What do you mean?" Laura replied, lifting her head off of Danny's shoulder. 

"There was something fishy about her. Kirsch and I were talking about it. There were just too many things that didn't add up." Laura felt an anger bubble in her stomach.

"And you didn't bother to tell me?" Laura said. Danny shook her head.

"No. We were going to watch over you and her for a while." Laura gritted her teeth. Watch over me? She echoed in her head. She may be weak at the moment, but she didn't need some guardian watching over her.

"Because I'm totally some defenseless child." Laura snapped back

"Laura I didn't mean it like that." 

"Then how did you mean it?" Danny opened her mouth to speak, but Laura held up her hand. "No, you know what? No. Get out. I don't care enough to hear whatever excuse you can muster up." Laura knew she didn't really want her to go; that she needed someone. But she was too hurt to care, too many memories of Alice and this same pain ringing to care. She was too hurt with the image of some girl's hands all over Carmilla to care. Danny shook her head.

"No, Laura. You're clearly not okay. I want to stay until I know you're alright." That hit a nerve.

"I can take care of myself!" Laura snapped. Danny looked hurt, and for a moment Laura felt bad.

"I didn't want a repeat like Alice." Salt to the wound. Fuel to the fire. Laura's fists started shaking. Ever since Alice, Danny was always over protective about any girl that came into Laura's life, and Laura hated it. She hated that she thought she couldn't take care of herself, that she thought she needed to be protected, and how she hovered over her like a helicopter like she needed it.

"And what, it's your duty to watch over me? It's your job to make sure little, defenseless Laura doesn't get her heart broken again?" Laura shot back, rage building inside of her, taking over the pain.

"No, well. Laura I-"

"Save it, Danny. Get out." Danny clenched her jaw, and nodded. She slowly lifted off the couch, and gave Laura one last painful look before storming out of her apartment. Laura curled herself into a ball. She shouldn't be reacting this way. Danny's right- she's weak. So weak.

Laura closed her eyes and drifted to sleep, hoping she could escape her past combining in the present in one painful, toxic mix.

 

**Danny**

 

Danny was going off of blind rage, sitting in her dorm while one of her sisters stared at her with terrified eyes. Danny called Laf and Perry and told them what happened. She wanted Carmilla out and away from everyone. God, Danny was right. She's always right- why won't Laura just listen to her? Can't she see she only wants whats best? And look at her now- she's the one crying. 

Danny hung up from her phone call with Perry and tossed her phone on her bed. She started pacing back and forth. She ran her hands through her hair. Who did Carmilla think she was? Toying with Laura's heart like that? Everyone saw that they couldn't keep their hands off of each other last night- it's clear something is going on between them. Even if she didn't see them grinding on each other, it's still blatantly obvious. Why won't Laura just let her protect her like everyone else did? Why can't she just see she cares? And even more, she was right to be wary of Carmilla, and Danny is still to blame. Why does everyone always blame her?

Danny's inner dialogue was interrupted when she heard a knock on her door. Taylor hopped off the bed and answered the door, clearly wanting someone to calm Danny down. She saw Kirsch standing there, and she did not have the patience for this.

"Lafontaine called me like 20 minutes ago, saying something about Carmilla and you being very pissed. What happened?" Taylor shoved past Kirsch, trying to give them privacy. Normally Danny would thank her for leaving or something, but she was too angry to focus. 

"Carmilla has a girlfriend. She's been toying with Laura- and Laura's pissed at me for trying to help." Kirsch placed his hand on her back, gently rubbing soothing patterns. It barely helped with the hurt rage burning inside of her.

"D-bear, we both know how Laura is. She's too independent, and from what I hear she's really upset. Too upset to see you're only trying to help her." Danny crossed her arms and huffed. "Come on. Staying in here and being angry isn't going to help. Why don't we go out and break into a really rad batch of Pilsner." Danny scoffed. Of course that's all he cares about. It's all he ever cares about.

"You know that's not essential right now." She snapped.

"Beer _is_ essential." Kirsch shot back. Danny glared at him.

"Do you always have to be such an idiot! My god, something serious is happening and all you can think about is fucking beer!" Danny knew she was only saying these things out of anger. She needed someone to take it out on, someone to pour her emotions onto. His expression softened, and she needed to continue. "I'm dating a moron! A fucking moron! Honestly, Kirsch. Do you even know the seriousness of this? God, you're a fucking idiot." Kirsch looked as though he was on the verge of crying. She knew it hurt when people called him that- especially when she did. But Danny just didn't have the capacity to care, and she needed to release this anger.

"I'm not an idiot." He said, drawing his hand from her back. 

"Yes you are Kirsch. You're a fucking idiot." Danny snapped back, knowing it would hurt him. His eyes became watery. Kirsch stared at her for a moment, a world of hurt shading his expression, and he stormed out. Something tugged at Danny's heart, and she ran a hand through her hair. God damn it, she fucked up. She fucked up again. He was only trying to help and all she could do was shout and scream like a child throwing an angry tangent. Danny sighed and sat down on the bed.

Can't someone not be mad at her? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 02x15 HAS LEFT MY HEART SHATTERED INTO A MILLION PIECES WHY DID THE WRITERS THINK IT WAS OKAY TO DO THAT


	15. Laura's Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is SUPER SUPER SHORT  
> But the next one will be up soon to make up for it

**Carmilla**

 

No one has talked to her in nearly a week. No communication from Kirsch, Danny, Laura, Lafontaine, Perry- no one. Mattie left last night, and Carmilla found herself lonely and brooding again. She knew she crossed the line, she knew it. How could she fuck up again? A little over a month of knowing this girl, and she's already fucked up. Not only with Laura, but with everyone. She always fucks up. A big, big fuck up.

"Hey." JP greeted, exiting from his bedroom. "You alright?" How did he know? Carmilla was laying on the couch in a bra and leather pants, staring at the ceiling, wondering what she did wrong. In her state, of course JP would know something was wrong. 

"Far from it." Carmilla replied, folding her hands on her abdomen. 

"Wanna talk about it?" Carmilla shook her head. "Aight. Well, I'm going to grab drinks with a couple lab buddies. Call me if you need anything." Carmilla waved him off and he left the apartment. Carmilla sighed. Mircalla hopped up on the couch and nuzzled under her chin, curling herself into a ball. Carmilla smiled sadly and started scratching the cat. At least someone stayed with her.

Can't she do something right? Does she always have to be the world's biggest fuck up? It was like she's a tornado; destroying everything that was unfortunate enough to cross her path. Is there anything she can do? No, she can. She can try to make this right. She has to at least try. Sitting here and brooding will not fix anything.

Carmilla gently pushed Mircalla off of her and rose out of the couch. She was always one to face her problems head on; she never ran. Always confrontation. She hated the cat and mouse game. She hated waiting, brooding, wondering what she did wrong. She cut off that behavior long ago when Elle and her broke up.

Carmilla picked up her phone and stared at Laura's contact. Her picture was a candid that Carmilla took of her laughing. It was a time when Laura visited Carmilla during her work, and the two walked around the city. Carmilla had made some pun or something, and Laura broke out into a 5 minutes giggle fit, and so she snuck a photo of her. She smiled at the memory as her thumb hovered over the CALL button. Either way, she's going to settle this. If Laura doesn't answer, she's going to her apartment. If she isn't there, she's going to keep trying. 

Carmilla pressed down the button and waited a moment before the ringing in her began.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

They sat at the bar with JP and a couple other friends from their lab. They had just finished a successful experiment on some explosive spores found on campus, and were now celebrating. JP pulled the stool next to them, and they clinked their glasses together.

It's been awkward with JP, knowing what they know. They feel terrible to leave Laura home alone, but they knew that's what she wanted. They felt guilty as well, knowing that Carmilla had a girlfriend when Laura felt something for her. They thought something was going on between them, but now seeing that it's one sided... And that they kissed...

Lafontaine gulped down a large sip of their beer, trying to shove past the worry and concern for Laura. All they wanted to do was storm down to Carmilla's apartment and yell at her, but they knew better. They knew at the core this was about wanting to protect Laura like they did after Alice, but they couldn't help it. Everyone secretly vowed to prevent Laura from falling in a spiral like that again, but she won't even let anyone help. Won't even talk about it to everyone. Saying she's fine when they're looking and spacing out when they're not. They sighed heavily.

"So I haven't seen y'all around lately." JP said, staring down at his drink. They wondered what could be going through his head. This kid was seriously a mad genius- always making theories, testing out ideas. He seemed to always know when something was up, and even when he knew something was up he somehow always knew why. So it didn't surprise Lafontaine to hear him ask that. They sighed again and took another sip.

"Yeah..." They wondered if he already knew. He must know, right? He's her roommate for crying out loud. And seeing as Carmilla has a hard time being in the same room with anyone (besides Laura, of course) for more than 2 minutes, he must be something special to her to live with her. That's clear. 

"Something happen?" And there it is. He must know something, and they're going to get it out of him. For Laura's sake. If he's going to be blunt, they might as well. (Though secretly they loved being blunt and shocking people.)

"Did you know Carmilla has a girlfriend?" They said, dropping the truth bomb like they're known to do. JP nearly choked on his drink, sputtering it out. 

"I beg your pardon?" He replied, grabbing a napkin and wiping his mouth, neatly folding it into a square before tossing it in a nearby trashcan. He always handled things with care no matter the object- that's something Lafontaine has picked up.

"Laura saw her in the bookstore with another girl." Lafontaine said. They examined JP, wondering if this reaction is genuine or if he's just doing it for show. JP shook his head.

"No, that's impossible. If Carmilla had a girlfriend, I would know. Are you sure that's what Laura saw?" JP questioned, cocking an eyebrow. He seems intrigued. He's leaning forward- a sign that he's genuinely interested. Is he interested that Carmilla has a girlfriend, or is he interested that someone found out? They need to know.

"Laura said she went down to the library and saw some girl hugging her while making heart eyes at one another." JP looked genuinely confused, his eyebrows furrowed and he seemed to be deep in thought. JP pressed his lips started to twitch a bit- a common sign of disbelief. This is genuine- he really doesn't know.

"What did she look like?" Lafontaine shrugged.

"She said she looked intimidating, tall, stunning, and she called her a 'little monster' or something of that sort." JP paused before breaking into hysterical laughter. Lafontaine raised their eyebrows. _Is it really that humorous?_ JP smacked his hand down on the table and smiled widely at Lafontaine.

"That's not Carmilla's girlfriend! That's her half-sister. Mattie." Lafontaine's eyes widened and they gasped.

"She has a sister?" He nodded slowly, his roaring laughter subsiding. They immediately fished out their phone.

"What are you doing?" He asked as they scrolled through their contacts.

"Calling Laura. She'd be stoked to hear this." He gave them a pointed look.

"How come?" They lifted their gaze from their phone.

"Oh come on. You must know _somethings_ going on between them." They replied, returning their gaze to their phone. He shrugged and took a sip of his drink.

"Yeah. Just wanted to see if you knew. Do you know about their little..." He made a gesture with his hands to show kissing. (Mad genius, too embarrassed to say they kissed. Adorable.) They nodded. "My god was that a mess." They mouthed the words 'I know' and pulled their phone to their ear, waiting for the ringing to begin.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura sat on her bed in sweatpants and a Silas University hoodie. She just finished her lit essay, and now had no work to drown herself in. She laid back and stared at her ceiling. Before she even had time to relax, her phone started buzzing. Laura groaned and rolled over, snatching the annoying phone from the bedside table. Upon seeing the Caller ID, Laura rolled her eyes.  _Fuck_. Laura sighed and shrugged.  _Might as well._

"Hello?"

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla anxiously waited as the ringing began, but was confused when she heard the familiar chime. Was that coming from inside her apartment? Carmilla looked around, until she heard rustling on the other end.

"I'm outside." The words made Carmilla's heart jump. She heard Laura's voice through the open window. Carmilla hung up and rushed to the door, fixing her hair before turning the knob. Her heart skipped a bit when she saw the girl in the familiar red plaid dress-  _that_  dress. Or as Carmilla liked to call it, the "we totally grinded and if JP wasn't there something would've happened between us" dress. Carmilla was rendered speechless for a moment. It had been so long since she'd seen her, and she didn't realize until now how much she missed her- even if it was that short amount of time. 

"Laura I-"

"Why didn't you tell me you have a sister?" Carmilla took a deep breath. Well...

_Shit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and kudos!


	16. Lady Friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wrote most of this chapter listening to Phantasmagoria by the Icky Blossoms if you want to check it out. Idk man, I really dig it.
> 
> Also this came out sssuuupppeer late. I'm sorry about that. Things got really hectic and a lot of stuff came up. Long story short, my grandparents made a surprise visit, I was locked in a room for 27 hours, and my parents accidentally ended up in Connecticut.
> 
> Anyway, sorry for the lateness.

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla bit down on her lip. How did she know? How did she find out? Did JP tell her? No, no he wouldn't do that. Right? A million questions ran through her mind as Laura stood there, gazing up at her with those honey-brown eyes.

"Uh..." Carmilla looked up and down the street. "Do you want to come inside?" 

"Not until you tell me what's going on." Laura replied, crossing her arms. There it was- that stubbornness and determination that Carmilla always adored. But right now, it was working against her. Carmilla sighed and ran her hand through her hair.

"Come inside, Laura. It's cold out." Carmilla said, her voice tainted with exasperation.

"Not until you tell me." Laura replied. Carmilla let out a frustrated huff. _This girl..._ She placed her hand on her forehead and leaned against the doorframe.

"Will you just get inside the damned apartment?" Laura shook her head again. Carmilla chewed on her lip. Is she seriously not coming inside? Carmilla huffed. "Fine." Carmilla made sure Mircalla wasn't around as she stepped into the cold Autumn air. Carmilla locked the door before shutting it behind her. "Follow me then." Carmilla knew where she wanted to go- the park. The park would be a good place to talk. It's quiet, and empty, and there's plenty of space to run incase things go haywire. She started speeding ahead of the caramel-haired girl, who quickly followed behind her. 

Carmilla had to organize her thoughts before they got there. She needed to stop asking questions of her own and figure out what she was going to say. What was she going to say? Carmilla shoved her hands into her hoodie, which at this moment, wishes was heavier because the cold air was biting at her skin. She threw on her hood and returned her hands to her pocket. There has to be a way to plan this out, right? Or no? She sighed. There's no way she's going to be able to describe this in an organized fashion. _Screw it. I'm winging this_.

Carmilla and Laura eventually arrived at the park. Since it was late out, there weren't many people. A few couples here and there, but Carmilla couldn't focus on that fact right now. Carmilla turned down one of the trails and plopped on a bench. Laura was soon to follow, though she was trying to hide that she was out of breath. Carmilla had surprisingly strong lungs, so she wasn't as winded from the extreme power walk she just pushed through. Carmilla rested her elbows on the back of the bench chair, staring up at the sky. There were a few moments of silence between the two as Carmilla admired the twinkling stars clinging to the dark night sky, shining as though there wasn't a care in the world.

"What are you doing?" Laura asked, plopping down next to Carmilla. Carmilla sighed, and shrugged.

"Looking at the stars." She replied quietly, mesmerized by the lights above.

"Oh..." Carmilla smiled slightly. Stars- that's something she could go on about forever.

"It's comforting... To think how small we are in comparison. All the lives we've lead- people we've been... Nothing to that light." Carmilla murmured. She looked away from the stars to Laura, who gazed at her with an unfathomable expression with her warm brown eyes. The stars could never compare to the light that was Laura Hollis.

"Which life are you leading?" Laura asked. Carmilla shook her head to herself, and looked back to the stars. Somewhere in the panic of talking about her past, she found some sort of serenity. Her serenity being a tiny gay with warm brown eyes.

"Where shall I start, then?" She felt the pain slowly rising that came with the thought of her past, her heart heavy. 

"When you left." Laura replied. Carmilla took a deep breath.

"Well, I moved to a small town somewhere in the States and Will joined the military." Carmilla's thoughts were all jumbled and her heart was pounding. She's never talked about her past with anyone. Briefly JP, but he doesn't know it all. He's only heard of how bad her mother was to her, and knows about Mattie, but now... Carmilla swallowed. "I bounced around a bit, and then my dad died in the military." She tapped two fingers to her heart and closed her eyes. "Shot right here." Carmilla prepared to fight back the tears, but she didn't need to when Laura placed her hand on Carmilla's knee. She found comfort in the small gesture, opening her eyes to look at Laura. She stared into the brown eyes, who didn't show her pity, but instead patience and understanding. Carmilla offered a small smile, and looked back to the stars.

"After that, we stopped moving, ending up in another small town in Canada. We stopped moving then, because there was no need to now that my father was gone. The first year I shut everyone off, still sulking over my dad's death. Come Junior year, and I decided to make friends. Thats where I met JP and... Elle." Carmilla swallowed again, her mouth feeling dry. She did her best to fend off the memories, trying to get through the story.

"It was a tough town." She began again. "Not really accepting, and people got beat up and into fights on the daily. So we all formed our own 'gay group' if you want to call it that. It was Halloween night when Elle and I started dating." Carmilla smiled at the memory. "It was good for a while. She was a year older than me, my first and only girlfriend actually. But it just turned manipulative, and controlling. It wasn't until I saw her hand under another girl's shirt that I realized how fucked up our relationship actually was. That night, I called Will, and he told me that we have a half sister." Carmilla could have ended it there. She could have just left out the hard part, pretend she just moved here to meet her, that her mother was perfect and everything was fine. But she couldn't. Laura has always been too good to Carmilla; always there for her, showing her what it's like to smile, to be happy again. She at least deserves the truth.

She peeled her gaze away from the stars and stared into Laura's warm brown eyes. She's known those eyes for so long, missed them for so long, and now they're here- showing her the same kindness and patience they always have.

"Laura there's something I gotta tell you." Carmilla said. She heard her pulse pounding in her ears. Laura nodded, and gave Carmilla a reassuring squeeze. "Since I was a child... My mother..." Carmilla gulped. "She was abusive." Carmilla watched Laura's face drop, and Carmilla closed her eyes. Laura's too pure for this. She doesn't need someone like Carmilla damaging her. Maybe if she tells her the truth, she'll run like the others. Carmilla draped her head, knowing that Laura was still looking at her. "Will was searching for so many ways to get me out of there. I told him the day before he joined the military so he couldn't change his mind on joining. So while he was out in training, he had a lawyer working the case. They found Mattie, and she agreed to take me in. We sent my mother to jail, and I moved to Austria to live with Mattie. JP's aunt coincidentally got a job here, and so he moved as well. Mattie saved me. But once I turned 19, Mattie told me that I should go out in the world. So, she bought me my apartment and allowed JP to live with me. Even bought me Mircalla." Carmilla smiled sadly. "She didn't have to save a screw up like me. I don't deserve it- I deserve all the hurt and pain I've experienced. I-" Laura moved her hand to Carmilla's shoulder, using the other to squeeze Carmilla's thigh.

"Carm." Laura said sternly. Carmilla slowly opened her eyes and lifted her head to meet Laura's gaze. Her eyes were soft, but burning with anger at the same time. "You deserve the world." Those four words were the most comforting Carmilla has ever received. Validation, comfort, security, love... All things Carmilla needed, all completed with a simple gesture and a sentimental sentence. She was amazed by the tiny girl before her. She's so strong, so intelligent, so amazingly beautiful in so many more ways than looks.

In the spur of the moment, Carmilla wrapped her arms around Laura, pressing her forehead to Laura's shoulder. Laura wrapped her arm around Carmilla's shoulders, using the other to rub soothing circles into her back. 

"I'm sorry I didn't know." Laura whispered. Carmilla pulled her head away, confused.

"What?" Carmilla replied, seeing the hurt on Laura's face.

"I should've known. I should have known what your mother was doing. I mean I knew she was a bitch but I didn't know that... God I should've known, I could have stopped it. I could have-"

"Alright, okay." Laura looked back into Carmilla's eyes, and she immediately felt the need to poise the girl again. "Just stop all of this, before I get queasy." Well, comfort in Carmilla's own way. Laura looked down at her knees. "Cupcake. You are ridiculous, and headstrong, and naive, and this whole blaming yourself gig is doomed." Carmilla curved her forefinger under Laura's chin and directed her to look back to Carmilla. "But unless you were going around, beating me every time I didn't say how high when you said jump, nothing that happened was your fault." Laura searched Carmilla's eyes and saw that she was speaking the truth, and nodded slowly. "Okay?" 

"Okay." Carmilla smiled, and couldn't help but press a kiss to Laura's forehead. 

"Thank you for listening, cupcake." Carmilla whispered. She needed that- she needed to tell someone what happened. And Laura handled it better than anyone she knew- apart from blaming herself. She comforted her in the way she's always craved, helped her in the simplest form, but did it better than any in her life ever had.

"Is that why you have scars on your back?" Laura suddenly asked. Carmilla stilled for a moment, but nodded. "Do they hurt?" 

"No, not anymore." Carmilla felt the need to make a joke, uncomfortable with the seriousness this was taking. "They're not from girls digging their nails into my back, surprisingly." Laura smirked and shook her head to herself. Good, she can make Laura smile too. That's all she needs to make her feel better right now. Carmilla took her hand off of Laura's chin and rested it on her arm."Why don't we go for a walk, yeah?" Laura smiled, and Carmilla pushed herself off of the bench, holding out her hand for Laura. Laura gazed at her hand for a moment, but slid hers in and Carmilla was seriously wondering why it felt like another piece of her world was put together.

She can only pretend Laura feels the same as they walked along the trail.

 

**Laura**

 

Along the walk, Laura felt the need to tell some of her past. She didn't have one nearly as tragic or lonesome as Carmilla's, but knowing Carmilla trusts her enough to tell her, that was enough for her to trust Carmilla. Laura didn't realize how much she missed this until Carmilla was back in her life. Even when they were kids, she always knew how to make Laura feel better. Maybe she can be the one to mend her again. 

"I have something to tell you too." Laura muttered, staring down at the ground.

"What is it, cupcake?" Carmilla replied, sensing the sudden change in Laura's mood.

"Well, when you left, I changed no doubt. I sulked for a while, but then came high school. Freshman year I came out, and I was a total dweeb so to speak. I had dropped journalism in 8th grade, but I dropped everything else in some feeble attempt to kill that memo. Really my friends were only Kirsch, Danny, Laf, and Perry. But sophomore year, everything sort of changed. I got, well what conventionally is, attractive. Kirsch ruled a high school frat club called the Zetas, Danny the Summer Society, and Lafontaine the Alchemy club. So being friends with them, I kinda got popular. Then came a lot of... Hooking up." Laura blushed, and Carmilla chuckled.

"You were a player back in the day?" Laura nodded bashfully.

"Yeah. I know I don't seem it now, but I was different back then." Carmilla nodded, and Laura continued. "Junior year came, and along the way between my mindless hookups and partying, I sort of caught feelings for Danny, and come Halloween we dated." Carmilla bursted out into laughter, and Laura elbowed her side. 

"I'm sorry. Did she have to get on her knees to kiss you? Oh my god did you have a step ladder?" That earned another elbow to her side, and Carmilla laughed again, making a few more comments on the height difference before recollecting herself, and if Carmilla's laugh wasn't so beautiful Laura was sure she'd be angrier than she actually was. "Okay, okay. I'm done. I'm done." Laura rolled her eyes, and continued.

"Anyways, within a couple months the relationship turned sour. She was too over protective, and I was too independent. So, we broke up. It wasn't too heartbreaking- well, after the first week I got over it I mean. Come my school's Junior Dance, I met Alice. I broke into the school's roof, she followed me up. We talked the whole night." Laura smiled at the memory, how nice it was back then. The calm before the storm.

"Gosh, it was so innocent in the beginning. Love notes in class, sneaking over each other's houses in the dead of night, visiting each other on surprise at the other's work... She was the only girl I've ever really loved." Laura paused for a moment, the familiar ache in her heart coming back.

"Then came Senior year. By now I picked up journalism again, and was taking a few classes on it. Alice and I's relationship started getting serious, and that's when it started to go downhill. She cheated on me a lot, and I have to admit sometimes I cheated on her. She would spread lies to other people about me, and then tell me that someone else had said them so she could play hero and comfort me. We would go through periods of being completely in love, or at least I loving her, to periods where we were ready to tear each others heads off. It was a bad relationship, really unhealthy. So, I broke it off. After that I wasn't the same for a while. I travelled around Europe with my dad for a couple months before I returned, ready to start my first year at Silas. She really fucked me up for a while, and I'm still affected by her, you know? And I hate it, I hate that she still has that power over me. People tell me to get over it, but..."

"You never get over those types of things." Carmilla stated. Laura dragged her eyes from the ground to meet Carmilla's soft, comforting gaze. There was something else; sympathy. She wasn't telling Laura what she should do, what she shouldn't, try to give advice, she was just... There. How, after so many years, can she comfort Laura like no one else? She's ran to so many people with this problem, and had gone further more in depth about the relationship than she did just now, but somehow Carmilla has comforted her better than anyone else.

"Elle and I's relationship was unhealthy too." Carmilla started again. "She was my first time, but I wasn't ready. Really I should have known then that it wasn't healthy, but I was so blindly in love, and so manipulated that I didn't know. The last thing she told me was that I deserved to be abused by my mother, and she's glad I was." Laura wrapped her arm around Carmilla's waist, wanting to comfort the girl without pitying her. She knew Carmilla always hated pity, condolences, apologies... Really all you could do was be there for her. Carmilla wrapped her arm around Laura's shoulder and held her tightly. They stayed like that for a moment, taking comfort in each other's arms, before Carmilla spoke again.

"You know, I was the complete opposite of you in high school." Laura looked up to Carmilla. 

"Really?" Carmilla nodded.

"Oh yeah. I was extremely unpopular, a total virgin, and I hardly ever drank or partied." Laura laughed at the thought of that.

"I can't imagine that now. I saw that waitress at Joe's Diner totally fall head over heels for you." Laura replied. Carmilla shrugged.

"Yeah, normally I'd take the opportunity to have a one night stand." Laura cocked her head to the side.

"What changed?" Carmilla smiled, and looked down to Laura.

"A certain someone." Laura smiled back. Was it bad that this was starting to feel like a date? That Laura really wanted to kiss Carmilla right now? They've done it before, so would it be different now? Before Laura could actually initiate anything, she looked back to the trail ahead. 

"Do you remember those friendship necklaces we had?" Laura said. Secretly, Laura still had hers. It was tucked away inside her yellow pillow. That was why she could never get rid of the damned thing; it contained something far more special.

"I still have it. It's in my jewelry box." Carmilla muttered. Laura was about to say that she had hers too, but Carmilla talked again. "It helped me get through a lot, you know. I found it when I broke up with Elle. It helped me when I had to testify against my mother, when I moved to Austria with Mattie, when I was having a bad day. When things became stable again, I stored it away just in case I ever need it, but now I don't; now I got you here." Laura smiled widely, spotting vulnerable Carmilla looked just then, and she knew she was trying to hide it but with a confession like that- there's not chance.

"I still have mine tucked away in my yellow pillow." Laura confessed. She blushed when Carmilla snapped her head to look at Laura. After a moment she chuckled, and squeezed Laura's arm.

"Nice to know I'm not the only one." Laura's eyes felt in pain when a flash light hit brightly against them. They turned to see a police officer standing on the trail. They were there way far past the hours, so no doubt they were about to get in trouble.

"What are you doing here?" He said in a deep voice. Laura was ready to surrender, when Carmilla grabbed Laura's hand.

"Run!" Carmilla exclaimed, dragging Laura down a hidden path. Laura's feet started picking up after Carmilla as she dragged her away, running at full speed. Laura was almost surprised at the speed Carmilla managed to pull off, her hair flying behind her like a flowing river. Laura felt the adrenaline course through her body as the police officer chased after them. Carmilla pulled them down another small path, and they started to gain distance from the officer. Laura couldn't stop the wide smile forming on her face, shocked at how fun this actually was for her. Laura was always followed the rules, so her willingness to run from the officer was surprising. No, she knows why. 

As long as Carmilla is with her, she'll do anything.

Suddenly, she felt like a kid again. She was running with Carmilla to their secret spot, laughing and giggling. Free and careless. The wide smile on her cheeks, the floating feeling. She hasn't felt this alive in a long while; not like this. And maybe it was the adrenaline pumping in her body, or maybe it was from being with Carmilla. Whatever it was, she was happy it was happening.

Carmilla suddenly came to a halt and juked behind a tree, dragging Laura with her. Laura's body smashed into the front of Carmilla's, and Carmilla wrapped her arms around Laura's waist to catch her.

"Sh." Carmilla whispered, staring off into the distance. Laura suppressed her need to squeal and held her breath. It was intense, terrifying, but yet so exhilarating. Laura's hardly ever done things like this in her life- and the fact that she's with Carmilla made it more special. Moments passed before they saw a bright light shine in the distance. It moved away until it disappeared, and the two girls finally breathed. They looked at each other, and broke into laughter, doing their best to stay quiet.

"Oh my god! That was incredible!" Laura exclaimed between laughter. "I've never ran from an officer before! And you- you were amazing!" Carmilla chuckled and shook her head.

"Oh please." Carmilla replied, waving it off.

"No, really! You were making moves at the last moment. You were like dragging me every which way just in the nick of time! I mean, I feel like an escaped convict!" Laura exclaimed excitedly, her body still pumping with adrenaline. Carmilla snickered again.

"Stick with me cutie and you'll probably find yourself in another situation like this." Laura beamed up at Carmilla.

"I'd go anywhere with you." Carmilla gave Laura a look, one she couldn't determine. Laura may or may not have just died once she realized that she really just said that, but she didn't even have time to get embarrassed over it upon realizing the position they were in.

Carmilla was pinned against the tree, her arms secure around Laura's waist. One of Laura's hands were clenching Carmilla's hoodie on her shoulder. Her other hand was on her hip. Laura stared up in Carmilla's eyes, seeing that she realized what Laura had.

Carmilla brushed some hair out of Laura's face as they stared at each other in complete adoration. Carmilla let her hand rest on Laura's cheek, her thumb gently stroking over her cheekbone. Laura's heart was no longer pounding from the adrenaline, but from the intimate moment. Was she still out of breath from running, or from Carmilla? Their faces were so close together... Laura felt the atmosphere change around them, the light-hearted feeling slowly sinking down. 

"You're really something else, Laura Hollis." Carmilla murmured. Laura took a sharp breath in, trying to ease the feelings sparking alive inside of her, but to no avail. Laura couldn't take it anymore, and pulled Carmilla's lips to her own. Just as they touched, barely brushing against each other, the familiar light shined on them. 

"HEY! YOU TWO!" Laura felt Carmilla smile.

"Try to keep up, creampuff." She whispered on her lips. And with that, Carmilla started to dart away. Laura immediately chased after her, feeling alive once again.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch laid on the grass in the middle of campus, staring at the sky. His hands were behind his head, his mind still spinning from his fight with Danny. It's been days since it happened, and neither of them have tried to speak to each other. This would be a time when their stubborn personalities and competitive nature really showed to be a fault in there relationship.

He was deeply upset. Danny never called him stupid, never tried to make him believe that he wasn't smart- or if she said so she pointed out how he was smart in other ways. He knows that she's just upset, but she wouldn't even let him comfort her. He's such an idiot. He screws up all the time with her. Why can't he do anything right? 

"You're not a screw up." He heard a soft voice say. Was he just saying all that out loud? He opened his eyes to see the redhead that pushed him here standing above him. 

"Oh. You're here." Kirsch grumbled. looking back to the sky.

"I am... Can I lay with you?" Kirsch shrugged, too angry and hurt to make a response. Danny sighed and moved next to him, making sure to leave some space between them. He clenched his jaw. "Look, Kirsch... I'm really sorry, okay?" He shrugged again.

"Whatever..." He knew that probably hurt her, and he cared too much to leave it at that. "I know you were upset. It's fine." 

"No, it's not fine." She suddenly snapped. Kirsch turned his head to look at her, and she was still staring at the stars. She looked beautiful under the starlight- hell she always looked beautiful. But there was a way the stars outlined her features; like her jawline was marbled by some sort of god, or the way her hair would glimmer, or how her skin seemed so soft.

"Kirsch, you have emotions too." She stated, bringing him out of his daze. "Just because I was upset, doesn't mean it's okay to make you feel the same way. I'm sorry." Danny let her cheek fall to the grass to look back at him. He could tell by the soft gaze in her eyes that she was really sorry, and he smiled.

"It's okay." Danny sighed of relief and nodded. "C'mere." Kirsch added, patting the spot next to him. She smiled and happily obliged, letting her head rest on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders. 

"I think that one looks like a ping pong paddle." Danny said, pointing to a constellation. 

"I think it says 'Danny Lawrence totally just admitted she's wrong. This must be the rapture'." Danny laughed her sweet, rare laugh that only Kirsch got to hear. He grinned.

"Tell anyone and I'll kick you ass."

"As if you could."

"I totally can!" 

"Sure you can." And with that, they went back to their normal bickering. Kirsch was glad to have someone like Danny.

She was too perfect for him to lose.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla bursted through her apartment door with Laura, laughing and out of breath. They walked up the stairs, trying to not collapse just then and there. The girls had ran all the way from the park to Carmilla's apartment, which was a good mile and a half. 

"Holy hell!" Laura exclaimed, grasping onto the railing. The girls kicked their shoes off, and Carmilla walked up the stairs. She leaned against the railing and stared down at Laura, who had yet to climb the final step. She looked back up to Carmilla. They were both panting, but not sweating from the cold weather outside. 

"I'm surprised you could run that far cupcake." Carmilla teased. 

" _I'm_ surprised I could even run." Laura replied, taking a few deep breaths and swallowing. "Do you think he's gone?" 

"I think we lost him a long time ago." Laura nodded as they both slowly regained their stamina. The moment was starting to turn intense. They totally sort-of kissed in the park. They completely got caught kissing in the park by a police officer. _Am I sure that I'm not in some teenage romantic comedy?_ Carmilla thought to herself. "My lungs are burning." Laura said, breaking the moment.

"I'll go grab us some drinks." Carmilla replied, tearing herself away and moving to her kitchen. She was surprised when Laura followed her in, but focused on the task at hand. Carmilla leaned down and opened her fridge, staring at her options. "Let's see. We got some waters, a few beers- though that's probably not the best idea. Some soda, a carton of milk, and peanut butter if you're into that." Carmilla stood up and turned around.

"So what will it-" Carmilla's words were captured in Laura's lips as she pushed her against the fridge, her hands eagerly grasping Carmilla's hips. Carmilla closed her eyes and moved her hand to tangle in Laura's hair, the other cupping her neck. Their lips disconnected only so Laura could tear off Carmilla's hoodie, and in that moment she's glad that she wasn't wearing anything but a bra underneath. 

Carmilla felt like an alcoholic getting their first sip of Whiskey after a long dry period, like a parched traveller across a desert who just drank from an oasis, like a fish finally going back into water after being held on land for too long. She needed her- all of her. And once she got that first addictive taste she couldn't stop.

Carmilla slid her hands under Laura's thighs and picked her up. Laura wrapped her legs around Carmilla's waist, and Carmilla placed her on the edge of the kitchen counter. Laura's hand tangled in Carmilla's hair, tugging slightly, but so sensually. Her other hand was wrapped tightly around Carmilla's shoulders, pulling her towards her. Carmilla's arm coiled around Laura's waist, her other hand slowly sliding up Laura's thigh. Laura stopped her, and for a moment Carmilla was disappointed.

"Let's take this to the bedroom." Laura whispered, her warm brown eyes wild. Carmilla nodded, willing to do whatever she wanted in that moment. Laura grabbed her hand and dragged her away to Carmilla's room. _How did she know which one is mine?_ Carmilla shook the thought off. _Doesn't matter_.

As soon as they were in the room Laura yanked the door shut, slamming Carmilla into a wall. Their lips met again, and Carmilla swears she's never tasted anything so sweet. Carmilla moved her hands to Laura's hips, holding onto her tightly to remind herself that she's there. Laura grabbed the back of Carmilla's head and clenched a fistful of hair, causing Carmilla's head to tilt back. Laura took the opportunity to kiss along Carmilla's neck. Carmilla's eyes rolled to the back of her head at the pleasure, and god was Laura good at this. Her heart thrashed mad in her chest, her mind trying to find an anchor Laura moved her hands to start unbuttoning Carmilla's pants, but Carmilla stopped her. She was not about to have sex against a wall.

"Uh, Laura." Carmilla said breathlessly.

"Mhm."

"As fun as this is, there's a bed right there." Laura pulled her head back and turned to see Carmilla's bed, still messy and undone. (Carmilla isn't very organized).

"Oh. Right." Laura flipped their stance and grabbed Carmilla's hips, pushing her till the back of her knees pressed against the frame. Laura pushed her onto the bed, and Carmilla crawled back into a more comfortable position. Laura was next, and she straddled Carmilla. Laura cupped Carmilla's neck in one hand, the other holding her hip. Carmilla moved her hands under Laura's dress, slowly moving up her thighs. Her fingers found the top of Laura's tights, and peeled them off tossed them away to some corner of the room. 

"There's a zipper on the back." Laura whispered, trailing her lips to Carmilla's neck. _Did this girl come prepared or something?_ Carmilla couldn't focus on the thought as she felt Laura nip at her pressure point. Carmilla felt like she could lose her mind, in fact, she was. Her body felt like it was no longer hers, her mind gone with only one intention. She moved her eager hands to Laura's back and searched for the zipper. She made a mental fist pump in her head when she felt the cold steel, and unzipped it. Carmilla doesn't think she's ever longed for anything more in her life. Laura and Carmilla worked together to slide the dress off, tossing it away to some unknown corner of the room. 

This was different, far different than anything Carmilla had experienced. The game was all the same but the feelings were so beyond what Carmilla ever thought possible. She didn't know she could long for a touch this bad, experience this much satisfaction from someone's kiss, didn't know how much she could lose herself over something as simple as this, heading down a dark path of lust and want. 

"You doing okay?" Laura whispered, detaching her lips from Carmilla's neck. _As long as you go back to using your lips like that._ Carmilla thought to herself. She took a moment to answer, trying to recollect her mind. 

"Yeah. You?" She almost couldn't say in her breathless state.

"Definitely." The two pressed their lips together again, tongues dancing in a tango as their lips met in a greeting. Carmilla flipped them so that Carmilla was hovering above Laura now, one leg between hers and the other on the outside of her hip. Carmilla moved one hand next to Laura's head, the other cupping Laura's neck. Laura released a breathless moan, and my god did Carmilla want to hear that again. Laura moved her hand to Carmilla's back, and was about to unclasp her bra when-

"CARMILLA! I'M HOME AND I HAVE COMPANY!" Carmilla and Laura pulled their lips apart, and look at each other with panicked eyes. As JP's footsteps followed by another made their way up the stairs, they looked to the door, frozen in fear. This could go one of two ways;

One: JP and company leave Carmilla alone, and the two will have to stake it out in her room until JP and company fall asleep  
Two: JP and company burst through Carmilla's door and see the position their in

The worse option of the two (and Carmilla's worst fear) happens as the doorknob rattles. 

"But don't worry it's just-" His words die off as the door opens, and he spots what's happening. Carmilla felt like a teenage who's parents just walked in on her having sex. Another reason why Laura makes her feel like she's a teen again. "... Lafontaine. Yep, I'll be going now." He shut the door quickly, and Carmilla can barely make out their muffled conversation.

"What's in there?" 

"Don't worry about it."

"Is it some killer fungi?"

"Sure Lafontaine."

"Is there a lady friend?" 

"Let's get you situated before you black out." 

Carmilla and Laura slowly meet eyes again. Carmilla really shouldn't have anything to be embarrassed about. She's a grown woman for Pete's sake. She has sex, it's no big deal. But yet, she can't help but feel it different with Laura- as everything always is.

The moment had died, so kissing her was not an option. But what was there to say? You look nice almost naked in my bed? Which was true, but Carmilla couldn't exactly say that. Does she move? Laura wasn't moving either; her hands were still on Carmilla's back. What now? 

Laura then broke into laughter, moving her hands to bury her head in. Carmilla couldn't help but laugh at the sweet sound, collapsing next to the giggling girl. Carmilla laid on her back and they laughed in unison. Carmilla folded her hands over her abdomen, shaking her head. Laura sat up, and pressed her knees to the back of her hands. Carmilla rested her head against the pillow and stared up at Laura in complete awe and adoration. She looked so cute right now- how she's all flustered. Did Carmilla Karnstein really just call an almost-naked girl in her bed cute? She smiled wide.

Yeah, things are different with Laura.

Laura picked her head out of her hands and stared down at Carmilla with the same adoration in her eyes, and it's enough to send butterflies to Carmilla's stomach. Laura smiled brightly. And this girl says she's perfect.

"This night really couldn't get any odder." Laura said. Carmilla chuckled. Of course Laura could make something as awkward as this so adorable.

They stayed like that for a while, just talking, Carmilla laying down, Laura sitting, staring at each other. It really should've been more uncomfortable than it was as they both remained with the lack of clothes, but for some reason it wasn't. Again, everything with Laura was different. Eventually JP gave them the go ahead that Lafontaine was asleep, though he was clearly bewildered that they just talked like that, and didn't continue what they started before. Laura eventually left (fully clothed, however), leaving Carmilla with a smile, but at the same time with a frown.

How the hell is she going to talk to Laura normally now?

 

_ **THE NEXT DAY** _

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Waking up in Carmilla and JP's apartment was not something they had expected when they woke up, smelling the bitter smell of coffee. Lafontaine's head pounded, like a constant hammer to a nail. Slowly, they lifted from the couch with a groan. They stretched their arms above their head and looked around, spotting JP making coffee. _What time is it?_ They wondered. 

Lafontaine pulled their phone from their pocket, and saw that it was 3 o'clock. They sighed. They missed a few of their classes, but they had enough time to go back to their apartment then attend the next ones. They opened up their phone and spotted several missed calls and texts. They expected it to be Perry, but were surprised when it was Laura instead. 

With a bewildered expression, they opened up a long, long string of numerous texts from Laura. 

 _ **Laura:** Hey_  
_**Laura:** R u awake?_  
_**Laura:** Do u remember last nite at all?_  
_**Laura:** Probably not huh?_  
_**Laura:** Not that it's any of my business_  
_**Laura:** I mean it can b if u want it to_  
_**Laura:** But u probs dont_  
_**Laura:** Or do U?_  
_**Laura:** Text me_

_Missed Call (3) From Laura_

_**Laura:** Ayyyy_  
_**Laura:** Been a while now. U up?_  
_**Laura:** Text me_

 _ **Laura:** Jst chekin in_  
_**Laura:** Do u remember last nite?_

 _ **Laura:** Wassssuup!_  
_**Laura:** How u holdin up?_  
_**Laura:** U good?_  
_**Laura:** Yes?_  
_**Laura:** No?  
**Laura:** Maybe so?_

 _Missed Call (1) From_ _Laura_

Lafontaine rubbed their forehead, the light from their phone glaring into their eyes as though they were staring at the sun from 3 feet away. _What is Laura's issue?_ They wondered. Lafontaine sighed, and decided to text her once they talked to JP. 

Lafontaine slipped their phone into their pocket and pushed themselves off the couch, once more stretching their arms above their head. They immediately rushed their hands to the source of the pain, their head still pounding.

"Hey sleepyhead." JP greeted, handing Lafontaine a mug of coffee.

"Your the best." They said, taking it in their hands for a sip. "What happened last night? My brain feels like it was put inside a laundry machine." JP laughed and shrugged as if the answer were obvious.

"We got hammered- well, you more then me. I tried calling you a cab but you refused, so I just let you crash here instead." They nodded, and took another sip of the coffee. "Please tell me you remember something of last night." He suddenly pleaded. Lafontaine cocked their eyebrow. Why is everyone asking them that? Lafontaine thought for a moment, trying to recollect the scattered memories of the night before. They shook their head.

"Nah, sorry bud. Y'know, Laura asked me the same thing. Why?" JP groaned, and walked back to the kitchen.

"I can't say. I am under oath." Is everyone on drugs? Did Lafontaine just miss some really big mushroom session? They decided to ignore it, downing their mug in one go. 

"Well, thanks for letting me crash here, but I should probably get back. I have classes soon." JP gave them a thumbs up, waving them off. They grabbed their abandoned jacket from the night before and waltzed out of the apartment, yanking out their phone to send Laura a quick text.

_**Lafontaine:** No, I don't remember anything from last night. I'm all good- heading back now._

They'll have to figure out why everyone's acting so odd.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura thanked whatever god's above there were that Lafontaine didn't remember last night. When Laura had snuck out of Carmilla's room, Lafontaine was sort of awake, and spotted her. They asked what she was doing, and eventually started to piece it together on their own. Wanting to escape the god awful conversation, Laura simply lied and said she had slept with Carmilla, then bolted out the door.

Now, she was sitting on a bench a couple ways down from Carmilla's bookstore. She wanted to talk about... _It._ Laura was reaching a point where she was done with running, but at the same time all she wanted to do just then was run. She doesn't want to confront this, but at the same time she does. The classic 'What are we' talk. Of course, the mere thought made Laura want to pull a Sound of Music and run through the hills of Austria. But yet again, she wants to stay. She wants to figure this out- only because it's Carmilla. Laura Hollis doesn't do that- she doesn't run. She faces the problem head on, and fixes it in the best way she can. 

But yet, she finds herself sitting on a bench, too scared to walk the few ways down and enter Carmilla's bookstore. She's already thought of a million and ten excuses as to why she shouldn't, some being that she's probably too busy, some being that this probably doesn't mean anything to Carmilla, and others being that Laura's going to mess it up somehow, doubting herself in every way possible. But she knows that doubting herself and thinking about 'what ifs' won't fix her problem. So, like the adult she is, Laura sighed, and pushed herself off the bench.

 _I am such an adult for doing this_. She thought as she started to walk the way down to Carmilla's bookstore, but as she drew closer her thoughts drew further from self praise. _Why do I have to be the one? Why can't she do it? She's older than me. I don't want to be the adult and have responsibilities._ Laura's inner dialogue cursed herself for doing this, wanting to go back, to leave, to do anything but confront this head on. The only thing driving her was remembering Carmilla's touch, her kiss, her body and mind, and the thought of what could happen if she does talk about it. 

She would ask what they are, and Carmilla could say she doesn't know. They would talk about it, and somehow, someway Carmilla would feel the same, and they would be together in the way Laura wants. But does Laura want that? Is she ready for that? With Carmilla, she wants to. But it's the thought of being with someone, the pain of her last relationship, the terrible memories and the awful taste of Alice's name that make her thoughts go dark into a path of misery. It's remembering how hurt she was, how little she trusts someone else to care for her in that way, how terrified she is of doing this.

Laura's heart nearly stopped as she reached the front door to Carmilla's library. Laura watched as Carmilla organized one of the shelves, checking the name of the book before placing it back on, her movements so graceful. Can she do this? Can she really do this? She should just walk away. She can walk away now. Laura should just walk away while she still has a chance, while-

Her thoughts stopped when Carmilla's dark eyes met hers. There was a moment between them, as though they were both reliving the moments of their kiss, the stories they shared, their painful pasts and the comforting words. Laura remembered how soft Carmilla's skin felt under her fingertips, making them itch to touch her again. Her lips tingled from remembering how Carmilla's felt on hers, the sensation overwhelming. Her heart squeezed when she remembered Carmilla's awful past, her mother, her father dying, her terrible ex-girlfriend. All the awful things Carmilla had gone through, in turn Laura sharing hers. She remembered how Carmilla comforted her, the only person to ever comfort her successfully. 

Butterflies stormed her stomach as Carmilla smiled softly, gesturing for Laura to come in. Oh, right. Laura blinked a few times, pulling herself out of the trance she was in. She tugged the door open and took a step inside, looking around the organized bookshelves, the yellow walls, the rough rug- anywhere but Carmilla's dark eyes.

"Hey you." Carmilla said. _Hey you? What does she mean by that?_ As she usually does, Laura started to over think the small phrase. 

"Hey." Laura replied, sliding her hands into her jean pockets. A few moments of suffocating silence hung between them. Laura rolled back on her heals, wondering what to say next. Should she just say it? _What are we?_ The words danced on her tongue, just waiting to be said. Laura took a deep breath. She needed to do this- this needed to be said.

"What are we?" Laura blurted out, lifting her gaze to meet Carmilla's. Carmilla stilled completely, mid-way of putting a book on a shelf. Laura's heart started to thrash in her chest as she waited anxiously. It was like time had stopped momentarily, only to toy with Laura's sanity, a big middle finger to her.

"So why are you here, cutie?" Carmilla asked, going back to organizing the shelves. There were a million scenarios that Laura had ran through her head of the different ways this could go, and that was not one of them. Laura sighed, disappointment coming fast.  _Of course not. I don't mean anything to her._ Laura shook her head, mentally cursing herself for ever thinking this was a good idea.

"Never mind. I have to get to class." Laura sped out of the library, a pang weighing in her chest.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla sighed heavily, and stacked the book back into it's proper order. She could've handled that better; she knows that. But she realized then that she wasn't ready to confront it, but why? It's all she's wanted. She could have confessed her feelings right then and there, and end the confusion. Why couldn't she? And the look in Laura's eyes when she decided to ignore it... 

With another book in the shelf, Carmilla shook it off. _God, I'm acting like a teen. How does she do that? Make me act like I'm so young and foolish again?_  Carmilla pressed her forehead to a shelf. she has to fix this; she knows she has to. Running won't fix this- she knows that. Why can't she just be upfront? She always is. It's part of her; always the one to be straight forward, to be confrontational. Why does she change her? How does she change her like that? Carmilla thumped her head against the hardwood of the shelf, hearing it creak every time she did so.

"Um, are you okay?" Said the familiar South African voice. She waved him off.

"I'm fine, Theo." Carmilla muttered. Wait a second, he's a teenager. If Carmilla is acting like a teen, then maybe she can relate to him in some way. Shoving down the voice in the back of her head, screaming for her to keep her pride, she picked her head up and looked to the boy holding a stack of books. "If you nearly have sex with someone is it still platonic?" His eyes widened for a moment. Okay- maybe that's not the best way to open up. 

"Oh, uh..." Carmilla nearly cringed. Good job, Karnstein. You fucked up again. She sighed heavily, and leaned her back against the shelf.

"Sorry, sorry. That wasn't professional of me. I just... There's a girl on my mind. I'm sorry." She sighed again. "You can go back to work. Again, my apologies." She thunked her head back against the shelf, feeling the spines of the books press into her.

"I, um, I don't think so, if that's any help to your issue. I hope you figure it out with this, um, girl." Theo said rather awkwardly before scurrying off. Carmilla looked to the ceiling as though they could somehow give her the answers.

_I hope so too._

But she felt a twist in her stomach. Hope- she's always hated hope. Hope gets you nowhere. If you want something, you have to go out and get it; not hope that it comes to you, or hope that it all goes well. You have to make it go well. 

With newfound determination, Carmilla whipped out her phone. She scrolled through her contacts before she landed on Laura's, her thumb hovering over the call button. Should she call? How would she open up? Carmilla bit down on her lip. Hey Laura, just calling to say that I think I have feelings for you, if you still want to talk about it. Carmilla sighed. Maybe instead she should just ask her out for lunch.

She went to press the button, but it was like the world hated her, hated her determination because a customer came in. Carmilla refrained from groaning and instead smiled at the young man walking in.

Maybe another time.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

They must be the most popular person in the world today, because as they walked out of their class, soon to be making the journey back home, a large string of texts came to their phone. They cocked an eyebrow, and decided to scroll through them.

 _ **Perry:** SOS_  
_**Perry:** Please come to 716 Briggs Lane. These children are driving me mad and I need help! Babysitting four children, mother said u could come_  
_**Perry:** Lafontaine get ur ass down here_  
_**Perry:** And bring sweets- particularly chocolate (for the children; not me)_  
_**Perry:** Oh- and I love you_

Lafontaine laughed, and shot back a quick text saying they'd be there.

 

**Perry**

 

Perry was eternally grateful for Lafontaine's arrival. These little shi- Perry chastised herself. These little human beings were pulling at her hair, running after her with sharpened pencils,  fighting over EVERY THING, and screaming when they didn't get their way. There were three boys and one girl; a set of twins- one girl named Audrey and one boy named Nathan. The youngest of the children, Tommy, was extremely sweet, but the rest of the children literally crawled from the depths of hell. The oldest of the children, Ethan, was only 9 years old but had to be 666 years old really.

"Hey Perr." Lafontaine greeted as Perry opened the door, Tommy wrapped around her leg. Ethan and Audrey were in some sort of fight on the kitchen table over who got to keep a spoon (A FUC-... FREAKING SPOON) while Ethan chugged down a carton of milk. Lafontaine's eyes widened. "Whoa." Perry took the bag from their hand as though it were the key to Pandora's box. With Tommy still clinging to her leg, she rushed to the screaming children, and tossed whatever sweets Lafontaine had brought onto the table.

"Look, it's candy! Fetch!" She exclaimed. Like vultures to a carcass, the children rushed to the candy- even Tommy. Perry took that moment to snatch the spoon and milk, and put them back where they belong.

"Jesus Christ." Lafontaine muttered, following closely behind Perry. "Are your days usually like this?" She shook her head.

"Not at all." She said breathlessly. "These are just the devil's children." Perry wrapped her arms tightly around their neck, letting her head rest for just a moment before letting go again. "Thank you for coming." 

"No problem." They said, eyes wide in fear of the children.

"Ich möchte dieses Stück!" Cried Ethan. Perry groaned.

"Guys! What I say about German!" Perry snapped, rushing over to the children. Lafontaine followed suit.

"Perry! He's trying to steal my piece!" Audrey whined, tussling with Ethan for a piece of candy.

"I want it!" Ethan growled.

"It's mine!" Audrey snapped back.

"Ethan you-" Perry started.

"There's plenty more of those." Lafontaine said. The children looked to them in confusion, and they pulled out another piece of candy from the bag. They handed it to Ethan, who took it with a confused look.

"Oh." He muttered.

"See? If you guys didn't fight, then maybe you would know that. You see, fighting is bad. I would know; I'm a genius." Lafontaine explained calmly. The kid's jaws dropped in amazement, suddenly the candy forgotten. Perry smirked slightly.

"Whoa." Nathan said.

"A genius?" Tommy echoed. Lafontaine nodded.

"Yup. And a part time pirate- but you can't tell anyone that." They said.

"I wanna be a pirate!" Nathan exclaimed.

"No, I'm gonna be a pirate!" Ethan declared loudly.

"No, I am!" Shouted Nathan. Perry was about to snap again, her patience running low, but Lafontaine spoke before she could.

"You both can be." They said calmly. The kids looked as though that was the most bizarre thing they've ever heard.

"We can?" Ethan said in confusion. They nodded again.

"Mhm. See? If you guys stopped fighting, and actually shared, these issues would be resolved. Now, do you guys really wanna be a pirate?" They said, leaning down a bit.  They all nodded, jaws dropped in bewilderment. "Like, really really?" The children nodded again. "Okay. I'll make an exception for you guys." The children squealed with joy. "But," Lafontaine said, cutting their celebration short, "only if you guys do something for me. You see, pirates are very organized, and keep a tight ship. So, if you guys could color-code the candies in the bag out on the table, I'll allow you guys to be pirates. But, you can't fight about it. Pirates don't fight with their siblings." The children wasted no time in dumping the contents out, scrambling to match the colors. Perry stared in adoration at Lafontaine, impressed with how well they handled the children. Lafontaine turned around and gave Perry their cunning grin.

"Glad I'm here?"

"Completely." They laughed, and smoothed out Perry's wild hair. Since when were they so good with kids? Guess makes that reason 1066 why Perry loves Lafontaine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos! Again I apologize for the lateness.


	17. 50 Cent Is Relatable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... You may have noticed the chapter change from 18 to ?
> 
> Basically I've switched the ending so many times and I was never satisfied so I just decided to end it how I originally pictured in my head, but that means some more chapters.
> 
> Anyway, the updates might be a little sporadic, but they will be coming.

**Carmilla**

 

It doesn't matter who does what, or what does who, or what happens or who happens or who and what happens where, Carmilla will always hate Halloween. She hated it long before Elle, but Elle only added to the hatred, tainting the holiday forever in her mind. So she was surprised when she found herself agreeing to a Halloween party with Laura and friends.

It's been almost two weeks since their almost-sex accident. They chose to ignore it, like all their other incidents. Currently, Laura and Carmilla sat on a park bench, discussing whatever and what not when Laura brought up the topic.

"So... Can I ask you something?" Carmilla panicked for a brief moment, wondering if it's about that _thing_ they almost talked about. But despite herself, she found herself nodding.

"Sure, cupcake." Laura took a deep breath.

"So, I know you hate Halloween and all." _Oh, just Halloween. Wait, Halloween?_ "Well, on account of manipulative ex girlfriends and all, and wow was she a bitch? Like a serious bitch. I swear to god I'd beat her up if I had the chance. I'd-" Carmilla cocked an eyebrow, and Laura cleared her throat, realizing she let herself get carried away. "Anyway. Kirsch is throwing a party at his frat house, and I was wondering if you would come?" Carmilla sighed, both out of relief that this wasn't about that _thing_ and exasperation that instead it was about Halloween.

"Do I have to dress up?" Laura shook her head.

"No, no it's a dress down party actually. And I mean I totally get it if-"

"I'll go." Carmilla interrupted, and whatever hell she was going to be put through was worth it to see the tiny girl beam before her. She seemed shocked for a moment.

"You will?" Carmilla nodded, and rested her arm on the back of the park bench. "Huh. I thought it would be harder to convince you." _Me too, cupcake_. Carmilla smirked slightly.

"All you had to do was ask. Anyone else, and there'd better be Shakira riding on flying pigs for me to go." Laura smiled shyly and bowed her head, tucking a loose strand of hair from her hair. Carmilla would never get sick and tired of that. To her, it was always adorable. Carmilla reached out despite her better judgement and continued to tuck strands of hair behind Laura's ear. Laura flashed a smile to Carmilla, then bowed her head again.

If this girl continues to be this cute, Carmilla might just spontaneously combust. Or, you know, talk about whatever the hell is going on between them.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch sat on the roof of the frat building, his poles for legs dangling over the edge as he looked over the vast campus. What a year it's been for him. He moved to Austria with Danny and his friends, joined a frat home, reunited with Carmilla, and now the boys are starting to wonder if Kirsch should lead the frat house. Of course his group of friends wouldn't care about it, but he wanted to celebrate. Even if they just thought they were celebrating Halloween.

Kirsch's smile grew as he spotted a familiar red head walking to the building. 

"Danny! Danny up here!" Kirsch said, waving violently to capture the attention of his girlfriend. She looked around with that adorable confused expression before spotting Kirsch. Her eyes went wide.

"Oh my god, Kirsch! What are you doing up there? Stop waving! You're gonna fall!" Kirsch scoffed, offended Danny doubted his ability to balance on a roof.

"No I'm not! Come join me!" Danny ran her hand through her hair, and even from this far up he could see her shoulders widen into a frustrated sigh.

"I'll be up in a minute. Just, stop dangling over the edge." Danny called back before rushing into the building. Dangling his legs over the edge was the fun part. He was used to his feet always hitting the floor when he sat, or his legs always being so cramped. This was nice- it was different. He wasn't going to stop doing that. 

After a minute Danny took the seat next to him, cautiously sliding her legs over the edge.

"Kirsch?" She said in a panicked voice.

"Yeah?"

"You know I have a fear of heights, right?" He turned and noticed her chest was heaving, looking at her dangling legs as though a demon was crawling up them. Kirsch immediately swung his arm over Danny's shoulder and pulled her close.

"Don't worry babe. I got you." She clung onto his shirt.

"But what if we both fall?"

"We won't fall."

"Promise?"

"Promise." He felt Danny relax in his arm, and she leaned into him, her head resting on his shoulder. They sat in comfortable silence for a few moments. "So the bros are thinking of hiring me as the lead bro." Danny gave Kirsch's thigh a quick squeeze.

"That's great Kirsch." He was taken aback by the lack of a tangent or chastise. Where are the sarcastic comments? He looked down to his girlfriend to make sure she was okay. She looked back to him.

"That's it?" She cocked an eyebrow.

"That's what?"

"No sarcastic comments? Or comments on my intelligence?" Danny smiled and shook her head, resting it back on his shoulder.

"I can be happy for you Kirsch." He laughed and kissed the top of her head. "But that's great. Besides, those morons could use a leader like you." Kirsch smiled.

"And there she is." 

"I'm just saying. You could raise good, respectful frat boys." Kirsch laughed, and Danny clung to him in fear of falling. "Don't laugh so hard! You're going to push me off."

"Danny, I'm not going to let you go. I promise."

"That'd be comforting if I didn't think you'd drag me down with you." Kirsch smirked, and pulled his arm from Danny. She looked to him with a confused expression before he stood up.

"I just won't touch you ever again then." Danny rolled her eyes.

"Get back down here." Danny replied, patting the spot next to her. Kirsch crossed his arms and shook his head.

"Nope!" Danny pushed herself off the ground, and Kirsch started running. "Catch me if you can!"

"Champion of the Adonis hunt if you don't remember!" She called after him, chasing him around the roof. In hindsight, they probably shouldn't have been running at the roof. But to see Danny laugh, to see her competitive and determined like that, it was worth it.

She's always worth it.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

"Sweetie, get up. We have to go soon." Perry chastised. They groaned, pulling her in tighter. They were on their bed, cuddling and waking up from a nap. Lafontaine was not feeling the party vibe, and was determined to keep Perry there with them.

"But parties are so boring! Let's just stay inside, come on. Please?" They opened their eyes only to give Perry the soft ones they knew would win her over. She peered at them.

"I know what you're doing. It's not going to work." Perry replied with a small smile. Lafontaine groaned and hugged Perry tighter, burying their head into her neck.

"Plleeeaassee? Why don't we stay home and watch Netflix instead? Missing one party won't hurt." Perry sighed.

"It does sound better than a bunch of drunken frat boys..."

"See? Let's just stay home tonight, yeah?" Perry sighed again, and Lafontaine smiled. They knew they won.

"Yeah."

_VICTORY!_

 

**Laura**

 

Laura arrived at Carmilla's apartment, and straightened out her shirt. She walked here alone- something about Lafontaine feeling sick and Perry wanting to take care of them. Poor thing- they always loved to party. Shame they're sick.

Laura looked herself up and down, wondering if she looked okay. She wore a red plaid shirt rolled up at the sleeves along with dark gray skinny jeans. Did she look alright? Doesn't matter- she has to knock on that door eventually.

Laura mustered up all the courage she could and with a deep breath, she knocked on the wooden door. She heard shouting behind inside the apartment between Carmilla and JP before the door flung open. Laura's jaw nearly dropped to the floor.

Carmilla wore a black moon phase t-shirt, shorts that were so short they should be illegal, knee high socks, and combat boots. Laura sucked in a breath and put on her best smile. She's literally seen her almost-naked. Her shorts and amazing shoulders shouldn't affect her like this.

"Ready to go, creampuff?" Carmilla greeted with a smile. Laura felt a small blush tint her cheeks. _Where's a cold shower when you need one?_

"Is JP not going with us?" She shook her head, and stepped down into the street. 

"Something about lab work. Didn't care enough to listen." Carmilla said briefly before shutting the door behind her. Laura nodded, and hooked her arm into Carmilla's. 

"Well, let's go then." The two made their way to the college, and Laura had to do her best to keep her emotions in check. Carmilla looked beautiful tonight- well, she always did. But there was something different tonight. Maybe it was because of that almost-incident, or maybe it was because it was Halloween and she was excited for that. Either way, Carmilla looked stunning.

"I never would believe I'd go to another Halloween party- let alone it be at a frat house." Carmilla grumbled as she allowed Laura to drag her along the path to the fraternity home. Laura huffed and nudged Carmilla with her elbow.

"Come on. It'll be fun." Laura smirked, and gazed up at Carmilla. "I'll make it worth your while." She added in a low voice. Carmilla's eyes went wide for a moment. Laura giggled before Carmilla could reply, and took her hand. She started running to the frat house, ignoring Carmilla's questions of "what does that mean" and what not. Laura heard the music blaring in the house. Some techno music was playing, and she heard the chatter and occasional howling from some frat guy. 

Laura pushed the door open, and slowly edged inside. Bodies were smashing together, people were downing drinks, there was a game of beer pong in the far corner, a game of spin the bottle in the living room, and the rest was just people dancing and couples making out. Laura looked back to Carmilla as she shut the door, smirking mischievously. It's a party, and Laura knew that she can get a little... Crazy, when partying. So Carmilla was in for something different.

"Hey! You guys made it!" Kirsch shouted, pushing past a grinding couple and to the two smaller girls. 

"Of course!" Laura replied. Laura rushed up to Kirsch and he pulled Laura into a big bear hug. 

"I can never get over how tiny you are!" Kirsch exclaimed, swirling her around. Laura laughed and slapped Kirsch's shoulder, forcing him to put her down. Laura turned to Carmilla, who was still the same brooding gay. No- not tonight. Laura's not letting her be a broody, gay Carmilla tonight. Laura grabbed Carmilla's hand and yanked her into a group hug with Kirsch despite her protests.

"No. Too affectionate for me, pup." Carmilla grumbled as Kirsch wrapped his lanky arms around her.

"Oh c'mon Carmilla! I'm not letting you go until you hug me back." He teased. She grumbled some more until she loosely wrapped her arm around his waist. "See? Was that so bad?" He teased as she pulled herself away.

"Yes. I literally feel my soul being drained from my body at this very moment." Carmilla snapped back. Laura rolled her eyes, and grabbed Carmilla's hands. Laura was absolutely determined to make the smaller girl have fun. Even if it wasn't here, Carmilla was going to have a fun Halloween. She didn't set this up for her to brood.

"Allow yourself to have fun for once." Laura said, swinging their conjoined hands a bit. Carmilla's hard exterior seemed to break a little bit, and she huffed. She's never going to make this easy for Laura.

"Fine." Laura squealed.

"Yay! Let's go!" Laura dragged Carmilla into the party. One advantage to being small was the ability to sneak through crowds like this- though she was being anything but subtle with a broody Carmilla attached to her. 

"What's first creampuff?" Carmilla called to her over the booming music. Oh- Laura hadn't really thought of that. She was too focused on actually getting Carmilla to the party that the thought of what to do next hadn't really crossed her mind. Laura spotted a cooler full of drinks. Should she? Laura had promised herself she wouldn't talk about the _thing_ at all tonight; even her drunk self has to keep that promise. Laura smiled.

"Follow me." Laura interlaced her hand in Carmilla's and dragged her over to the cooler. She pulled out two beers. With a bit of protest to the cheap brand, Carmilla eventually took the beer. They clinked their bottles together and took a few sips.

"This tastes like piss." Carmilla grimaced, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. Laura laughed.

"Lighten up a bit. I mean, sure this beer tastes like piss. And yeah, it took everything I had not to dry heave when I saw the serious PDA between that couple, and maybe the music is a little loud..." Laura smiled, and nudged Carmilla with her shoulder. "But you're here. That's what's important." Laura could hardly see a smile dancing on Carmilla's lips. Carmilla sighed, and shrugged.

"Screw it." Carmilla threw her head back and chugged the beer in a moments notice. Laura had to admit- she was impressed. But Laura could do so much better than that. Laura was next to follow, chugging her beer in record time. She felt the slight burn travel down to her stomach, the buzz soon coming afterwards. She tossed the beer to the side and tugged Carmilla to the dancing bodies.

"Where we going now cupcake?"

"Now you're dancing with me!" Disco Inferno by 50 Cent started to play, and there was a cheer from the crowd. More bodies started to join the dance floor as the song blared through the speakers. 

"What if I don't want to dance?" Carmilla challenged. Laura smiled.

"Little mama show me how you work it!" Laura belted out the lyrics.

"Oh god." Laura pulled Carmilla to her, their bodies pressing against each other.

"Go ahead, put your back into it." Laura grabbed Carmilla's hands and put them on her hips, soon moving hers to Carmilla's as she started to dance. 

"The only thing I'm putting my back into is a bed." Carmilla replied, her grip on Laura tightening. 

"Do your thing like there ain't nothing to it." Carmilla rolled her eyes, but joined Laura in the dancing. Laura let her hands wander along the small of Carmilla's back, riling up her shirt a bit and feeling her skin under her fingertips. Carmilla bit her lip as she stared intensely into Laura's eyes. _What is she thinking? Is she enjoying this as much as I am?_ All Laura knew is she wanted to bask in this feeling, to force Carmilla to have fun. Laura guided her hands a bit higher under Carmilla's shirt. _How far can I take this?_ Laura wondered.

She's willing to find out.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla was completely entranced with the dancing girl in her arms. To the way her hips moved, to the look she was giving her, to the way she completely dominated over Carmilla, to the mischievous grin tugging on her lips, to the way she was touching Carmilla. Her hands traveled a bit further up Carmilla's back, causing her breath to hitch. _God, she's incredible_.

_Shorty' hips is hypnotic, she moves is so erotic_

Never in Carmilla's life would she think she'd ever relate to a 50 Cent lyric, but here she is. Then again, she never thought she'd be;  
A: At a party in a frat house  
B: Grinding with Laura  
C: Actually enjoying Halloween

And yet...

Laura was enticing. She had some sort of spell over Carmilla; but she doesn't want it to stop. She doesn't want Laura to stop. She could stay here with Laura forever. Hell, she could stay anywhere forever as long as Laura was there. _My god is this bad._ She thought to herself. Carmilla's really dug her own grave now. But yet again, death by Laura Hollis wasn't the worst death to lead.

Carmilla's mouth went dry as Laura slowly took her hand off of one of Carmilla's hips and unbuttoned two buttons from her red plaid shirt, then returned to gripping Carmilla's hips. _What..._ Carmilla's mind started reeling as the girl continued to stare in her eyes. Something in those honey-brown eyes darkened, and Carmilla found herself falling in deeper to the trance Laura has her under.

 _You see me shining, lit up with diamonds as I stay grinding._  
_Homie you can catch me swooping Bentley coupe and switching lanes._  
_You see me rolling, you know I'm holding, I'm about my paper, yeah._

Laura smirked and turned around, pressing her back to Carmilla's front. Carmilla's hands barely waisted any time before grabbing Laura's hips, pulling her closer. Laura leaned back into Carmilla and bit her lip. _She's intoxicating... I wonder if I just..._

Carmilla leaned forward and started kissing along Laura's neck, earning a breathy moan from the smaller girl. The sound sent Carmilla spiraling down a dark path of lust and want. Laura reached up and tangled her hand in Carmilla's raven hair, pulling her lips closer to her neck. She's far crossed the boundaries of this ever being platonic, but Carmilla was too into it to care. Hearing the small moans, feeling every pull, every sway of her hips, feeling her heart thrash in her chest and hearing her breath hitch sent her down a spiral she didn't even know existed.

"Oo! Get it!" Carmilla kept her lips latched on Laura's neck, lifting her angry gaze to see JP grinding with some girl, a cup in one hand and the girl's waist in the other. _Idiot_. Thankfully Laura didn't seem to notice, and Carmilla flipped him off, then moved her hand to Laura's stomach. _Wasn't he supposed to stay home?_ She could hardly focus when she heard another moan come from Laura, dragging her back down under whatever spell she was drowning in. The song switched to Feel It In My Bones by Tiesto featuring Tegan and Sara. 

Not 10 minutes ago was Carmilla dreading ever doing something for Halloween, let alone it being a frat boy party. Now, she was grinding with her childhood friend while kissing her neck. This childhood friend who has also happened to flipped her life upside down in about 2 months upon seeing her again. Who flips her world upside down with every second she spends with her.

 _What rushes in to my heart and my skull,_  
_I can't control. Think about it, feel it in my bones._  
_What rushes in to my heart and my skull,_  
_I can't control._  
_I feel you in my bones_

Carmilla was disappointed when Laura pulled away, but the smaller girl grabbed her hand and started dragging her through the party. At this point, whatever the girl had in mind Carmilla would do. They escaped out the back door of the frat house, and Laura started pulling her down some path.

"Uh, Laura. As fun as getting pulled around every which way is, mind telling me where we're going?" Laura looked back to Carmilla and shrugged a shoulder.

"An adventure." Laura replied with a wiggle of her eyebrows and a small smirk. _Adventure? Yeah, this girl is going to be the death of me. How does she change so fast in the blink of an eye?_

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch's hands stayed on Danny's hips, Danny's on his broad shoulders, both of them swaying side to side. Danny looked to the side, and laughed. Curious, Kirsch turned his head, his jaw dropping immediately. There stood Carmilla and Laura, completely and totally grinding against each other. Kirsch grimaced and averted his eyes.

"Eugh!" He exclaimed.

"They seem to be celebrating your little upgrade, huh?" Danny teased. Kirsch looked back to Danny's impossibly blue eyes, a small grin on her lips.

"My god. When are they going to get together?" He said, trying to shake the image out of his head. Danny chuckled, and shrugged.

"You know, we've never actually hung out with Carmilla without Laura there." She said, quirking an eyebrow. He cocked his head to the side, curious at her intentions.

"Where are you going with this, Danny Lawrence?" He asked.

"I think we should make a surprise at her work one day. Ask her what's going on, you know?" Kirsch grinned widely, and nodded.

"I like that idea. Oh! I know I know I know! Maybe we can set them up!" Danny threw her head back and laughed her glorious laugh before her eyes came back into view.

"You really think they'd be fond of us, of all people, to set them up?" Kirsch pursed his lips. She had a point there. "Look, let's just check her out one day, you know? See what exactly is going on. Even though she doesn't have some secret girlfriend, I'm still cautious about this whole thing." He nodded understandingly. Carmilla had recently explained that she has a step-sister, and that's how she lives in her apartment. Laura explained that it was herself just over analyzing (no surprise there). But even with that, Kirsch couldn't help the need to watch over Carmilla, still wary from how Laura's last relationship played out. 

"I like that idea." She smiled, and kissed his cheek. 

"Cool. Now, back to hating each other. You dance like a chimpanzee."

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

 

**Carmilla**

 

Laura led Carmilla to an old, run down building. It was clear that it was abandoned with broken windows, some sort of vine growing on the outside of the brick building, and the graffiti. Carmilla eyed Laura suspiciously, picking up her pace to walk beside the caramel-haired girl. The building was about three or four stories high, and you could practically feel death oozing from the building. It was like it was telling her not to enter- actually it was. A large DO NOT ENTER sign hung from the door in bold red letters.

"Uh... Laura? What the frilly hell is this?" Carmilla said, trying to keep her fear out of her tone. Laura laughed.

"What, are you scared?" Well, she failed that one.

"Who wouldn't be? Besides the obvious sign, this place screams do not enter." Carmilla said, anxiously rubbing the back of her neck.

"Carmilla Karnstein is a scaredy cat? Huh. Who would've thunk." Laura teased with a grin. Carmilla huffed. She was not about to admit that she was scared, or rather, a scaredy cat.

"I am not a scaredy cat, okay." Carmilla reasoned, trying to convince both herself and the smaller girl. "I just... Don't feel like walking into creepy, abandoned buildings." They stood in front of the structure, a chain with a large lock hanging over the double doored-entrance with the large sign saying DO NOT ENTER in red letters on the front. A shiver ran down her spine. "Where the hell are we?" She asked, cautiously eyeing the building up and down

"The Lustig Building. In 2002 a cult killed themselves here. They didn't know what to do with it, so they just sort of closed it off. They never got rid of it, just kept it here. Kids sometimes break in, but most people are too scared. Apparently, you are one of them. I, on the other hand, am not." Laura let go of Carmilla's hand and marched up to the building with that look of determination. In any other circumstance she'd be watching in awe as she marched forward with that driven look, but right now, it might just be the death of Carmilla. She found her feet following suit.

"Laura! Are you crazy! We are not going into creepy mass suicide cult buildings! Do you see this?" She pointed to the sign. "Do not enter! It is literally telling us to not enter! You seeing this shit?" Carmilla exclaimed, looking around as though phantoms were watching through hollow eyes. Laura chuckled, and started playing with the chain that hung in front of the double metal doors.

"Don't be such a baby. Come on." She started examining the lock on the chain, feeling through each loop, toying with the lock.

"I am not being a baby!" Carmilla said, storming up the stairs leading to the building. "This is exactly what gets people killed in horror movies! A dumb teenage couple-"

"Luckily your not a teen then." Carmilla continued anyway.

"Go into an abandoned, creepy building that they clearly should NOT be venturing into. One is actually smart, and says no, and like any sane person would, be wary about going inside. Then the other person pushes them to go in, and they both get killed." Laura laughed and started pulling on the double doors handles, proving that they were locked.

"That's not how it happens." Laura said nonchalantly. She pulled a bobby pin from her back pocket and started to lock pick the door. _Oh my god she's seriously doing this._ Carmilla thought to herself. Her heart started to pace.

"That's _exactly_ how it happens!" Carmilla crossed her arms and looked around again. "This is literally every plot to a scary movie. You've got the fact that it's Halloween night, you've got your couple, you've got the one who acts nonchalant about going into a creepy murder building and the actual intelligent one screaming it's a bad idea. God, it's the perfect recipe for disaster! You've got the creepy murder building, the frat boy party, disconnecting from the safety of a crowd, and you've got the two idiots stupid enough to go into the mass suicide cult building!" Laura pushed the door open with a proud smile.

"Anndd got it. Record time too." She said, as though Carmilla's words simply soared through one ear and right out the other. Laura placed the bobby pin back into her back pocket.

"Were you not listening to a thing I just said?" Carmilla exclaimed, her hands feeling shaky from the adrenaline starting to coarse through her body. Laura bit her lip and shrugged.

"I just heard couple and making out." She retaliated, wriggling her eyebrows. Carmilla huffed and rolled her eyes. 

"This is incredibly idiotic." 

"This is adventure."

"This is impulsive."

"If you don't act on your impulses, the moment will pass you and you'll live in regret."

"I'd rather that because then I actually get to _live_." Laura laughed and lifted the chain, motioning her to go in. 

"After you, m'lady." Carmilla glared at Laura. _This girl is seriously going to be the death of me._  Carmilla rolled her eyes at how willing she was to follow the girl wherever she went before ducking under the chain.

"I can't believe I'm doing this." Carmilla grumbled as she walked into the dark building. Laura was soon to follow, and my god what has Laura gotten her into. 

The walls were tall, as though they were threatening any passerby. The entrance greeted by a long, creepy staircase that followed along the walls, hugging them tightly. A lone couch with a flower design sat in the middle of the room, one that had dust and spiderwebs all over it. Broken glass and garbage shrouded the floors along with dust bunnies. The vines from outside the building had broken through some of the windows, climbing up the walls in a spiral. There was only one row of windows ascending upwards per wall, and Carmilla counted a total of four per wall. Nearly each stained window was broken or shattered in some way, proving how run down this building was. The derelict floors were made out of run down concrete with cracks in them, allowing for dust and dirt particles to collect in them. Graffiti covered the walls, each of them being some sort of satanic symbol or a phrase in latin.

"Jesus christ..." Carmilla muttered, looking around the enervated interior. It was creepy; horror movie creepy. Nightmare on Elm Street creepy. _This is probably Freddy Krueger's apartment._ Carmilla felt Laura grab her hand, and she interlaced her fingers. Right now, Laura Hollis was the only reason she's not running through the hills of Austria.

"This is so cool!" Laura exclaimed, pulling out her phone and flashing a light around. The light was not helping- in fact making it worse. It highlighted every terrifying aspect there was to this abandoned building. A white mask sat in the corner, eyes painted so it looked like blood was running out of the eyes. _Well, isn't that dandy?_ She squeezed Laura's hand tighter, attempting to find a comfort to her terror.

"Are we seeing the same thing? This is terrifying!" Carmilla huddled closer to Laura. Yeah- she's a big wuss. Stand a big jock in front of her, she'll take him down. Face her with the paranormal, and Carmilla suddenly becomes a shaking chihuahua.

"Let's see what's up the stairs." Laura said with enthusiasm. Carmilla eyed her cautiously.

"You really wanna do that cupcake?" She said, turning her vision back to the stairs. The steel staircase looked like it could collapse at any moment. Spiderwebs hung between the metal bars, covered in dust and broken glass. You could see the rust staining the steel, and really nothing about this building is safe. The stairs looked as though they could give way at any moment, beaten down to this hazardous staircase.

"Come on, Carm." Laura started tugging Carmilla to the stairs, their footsteps shattering bits and pieces of the broken glass beneath their feet. They slowly started walking up the stairs, Laura taking her grand old time to admire every inch of the building she could see. The staircase creaked with each step as if to warn them off, shouting to go back, but Laura was stopping for nothing and Carmilla had a death grip on Laura's hand. They passed a contaminated window, and Carmilla could see the word "run" etched into the glass.

"Uh, Laura?" Carmilla said, using her other hand to grip Laura's arm.

"Yeah?"

"This window is _literally_ telling me to run." Carmilla said, stopping dead in her tracks. Laura flashed the light on the window and laughed as though the window showed some humorous image instead.

"Some kid probably did that. Come on." Laura gave Carmilla's hand an encouraging squeeze, and the two continued up the stairs. Carmilla's heart was pounding hard, and she's never felt more terrified in her life. If Laura wasn't here, she'd probably drop dead out of fear. Well, if Laura wasn't here neither would Carmilla. Carmilla wasn't sure if she wanted to run or just not move- maybe both. Does that make sense? No. But Carmilla is too terrified to think clearly, her heart pacing in her chest and breath unsteady. They passed the third window heading up as they made another turn.

"We are idiots. Idiots." Carmilla said, voice ridden with panic. "We are going to get killed. This is what happens in every horror movie." Carmilla said, panicking at the thought.

"Carmilla, Carmilla." Laura said softly, but securely. "Are you a dumb blonde?" Carmilla was taken aback by the question.

"What?"

"Are you dumb blonde?" Laura repeated. Carmilla furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

"Uh, no."

"Then you won't be the first to be murdered. Everyone knows it's always the dumb blonde to be murdered first, or the dumb blonde's boyfriend. So you have nothing to worry about." Carmilla took a deep breath and nodded. She walked close to Laura, using her other hand to grip her arm tightly. _This is stupid- this is so stupid._  She thought to herself. Carmilla shouldn't be doing this. This is like every horror movie. Sex crazed kids walked into abandoned building to make out and bam, they're murdered. Any sexual desire she was feeling before disappeared upon being at least 15 feet from this god-forsaken building. Why the hell is she doing this? The only sound to be heard was Carmilla's shaky breath, the creak of the stairs, and the crackling of the broken glass beneath each step.

"Can you like play music or something? The sound of creaking stairs is freaking me out." Carmilla muttered, worried someone was listening in on this conversation. Laura laughed, and stopped on the staircase to switch on some music. Cigarette Daydreams by Cage The Elephant started to play, and Carmilla started to relax to the calm melody. Laura flashed her light on her phone back on and continued to lead Carmilla up the stairs. 

"Just another flight. Can you make it?" Carmilla took a deep breath, and tightened her grip on Laura's hand and arm.

"Yeah, I think so." Carmilla counted the stairs with each step until they made it to the final one. They were greeted by another metal door with a handle. Laura rattled it a bit before pushing, and to Carmilla's surprise, the door opened. To Carmilla's surprise yet again, a blanket lay on the roof along with a bottle of champagne. Carmilla stopped dead in her tracks, eyeing the scenery. Laura smiled softly as if this wasn't bizarre and shut the door behind them. _Oh please don't tell me creepy cult building has alcoholic ghosts._

"What's this?" Carmilla asked. Laura shrugged and brought her over to the blanket.

"I wanted to make Halloween fun for you again. So, I figured what better way than to stargaze and drink champagne?" _Oh- no creepy alcoholic ghosts._ Carmilla chuckled, and couldn't help the smile forming on her cheeks. This girl is really something else. "And I had to visit the creepy building all on my own, by the way. So that just proves how much of a wuss you are." Carmilla rolled her eyes all the way around the world and followed Laura to the small set up.

"And out of all buildings, you had to chose the mass suicide one?" Laura plopped down on the blanket and grabbed the two wine glasses that sat next to the wine bottle.

"What? It's Halloween. I had to do _something_ scary." Carmilla shook her head to herself and sat down next to Laura. Laura's music still played quietly on her phone, but Carmilla couldn't make out what. She was too grateful for what Laura has done for her- and also grateful that she wasn't brutally murdered. Fingers crossed that the last part remains the same. Carmilla carefully ran her hand along the blanket and looked around. She really must have put a lot of thought into this, and a lot of time. Laura also climbed a creepy building all on her own, all for Carmilla... Carmilla smiled to the smaller girl beside her, staring in complete awe.

"You're really something special, you know that?" Laura smiled shyly and tucked a strand of caramel-colored hair behind her ear. Carmilla always loved it when she did that- it had to be the cutest thing ever. Laura handed Carmilla a glass and popped open the bottle, pouring the champagne into each of their wine glasses.

"See? We didn't get murdered." Laura teased, nudging Carmilla with her elbow. Carmilla smirked and raised her glass.

"To not getting murdered." Laura clinked her glass with Carmilla's, and they took a few sips of their champagne (which wow, that was good champagne). A few moments of silence fell between them. The fact that they were all over each other in the frat house hung over their heads. Just another thing to add to the "Do Not Talk About" list Carmilla guessed. Or, at the very least, "Shut Down When Laura Tries To Talk About It" list. Carmilla swirled her wine around in her glass, watching as it would nearly splash over the brim, but fall back in. It's like that, almost. All Carmilla has to do was tilt the glass and let the wine run, or reply when Laura talks about the _thing_ , and it will all be over. Why can't she just do that? Speak her mind?

"So. Do you like it?" Laura asked, being the one to break the silence and pulling Carmilla from her thoughts.

"Hm?" Carmilla asked, her attention moving back to Laura.

"The champagne. Do you like it?" Carmilla smiled and nodded.

"I do. It's lovely." Silence hang between them again, and Carmilla sighed and laid down on her back. She wasn't one to avoid confrontation, but with Laura it was different. Hell, everything with Laura was different. Carmilla would never step foot in a place like this, would never stop having one night stands and tossing away girls, would never not confront a problem head on, would never feel the way she did without Laura. She turned her head and looked to the girl sitting next to her, who was already looking down at Carmilla with a warm smile. She couldn't help but smile back. 

"Thanks, by the way. For this." Carmilla said, twirling her raven hair between her fingertips. Laura shrugged and took a small sip of her drink.

"I wanted to make tonight special." Carmilla's smile widened, and she looked to the stars. Carmilla was surprise when Laura laid next to her, resting her head on Carmilla's chest. Carmilla smiled, and wrapped her arm around Laura's upper torso. She set her drink aside and rested her hand under her head. They sat in serene silence for a while, gazing at the stars twinkling above while music played quietly from Laura's phone. Well, that was until For The First Time by The Script started to play.

 _She's all laid up in bed with a broken heart_  
_While I'm drinking Jack all alone in my local bar_

The familiar lyrics brought back the memory of her first ever kiss with Laura. She felt her heart start to pick up at the thought, memories flooding her mind. Did Laura plan for this song to play? She said she planned this whole night, right? Does she even remember that this was the song that was playing? Was it by chance? She can't be the only one who's mind was flooding with memories, right? Who's stomach was flooding with butterflies?

 _Trying to make it work but man these times are hard_  
_She needs me now but I can't seem to find a time_

Carmilla didn't notice how hard she was gripping Laura until the smaller girl shifted a bit. Carmilla immediately loosened her grip, and Laura turned on her side, throwing her arm around Carmilla's waist. Carmilla wrapped her arm around Laura's shoulders, and tried to make sure she wasn't squeezing the girl too hard.

 _We're smiling but we're close to tears_  
_Even after all these years_  
_We just now got the feeling that we're meeting_

Laura rested her chin on Carmilla's shoulder and they locked eyes.

_For the first time_

Carmilla's heart started to pound in her chest. That same look in Laura's eyes, but there was something different. It was more peaceful in the moment, and she knew Laura must feel the same. She couldn't be the only one feeling this, right? There was a certain look in her warm brown eyes, revealing she had to be thinking the same thing, remembering the same memory. Would it be so bad to talk about what's been happening between them? 

 _But we both know how_  
_How we're gonna make it work when it hurts_  
_When you pick yourself up_  
_You get kicked to the dirt_

If she just opened up, just this once. Showed her vulnerabilities just this once, would it be worth it? Would her feelings be returned? Does she make Laura's heart pound like she makes hers? Is she on her mind too, always there like a constant buzz?

 _Trying to make it work but_  
_Man, these times are hard_  
_But we're gonna start by_  
_Drinking old cheap bottles of wine_

It was scary how much these lyrics applied to them now. She has to speak her mind; open her mouth and her heart. If she could do it. If she could do it just this once... Would it be worth it? Would it be worth it to expose herself like that? To finally confront her problems? She watched as something golden shined behind her warm brown eyes, adding a glow to them. She has to try. Just this once, she had to try.

A sudden ringing of a phone interrupted the perfect moment, and Carmilla cursed the day cell phones were ever invented. She dug into her pocket, murmuring death threats to whoever invented the cell phone. But to her surprise, Laura snatched Carmilla's phone before she could answer and tossed it to the side.

"Uh, hey. What are you doing?" Carmilla asked, watching as her phone flew through the air momentarily to fall down at the edge of the blanket.

"Maybe I don't feel like sharing you right now." The air changed around them, growing tighter. Carmilla stared down at Laura as she rested her chin on Carmilla's shoulder, the two staring deeply into each other's eyes. They stayed like that, Carmilla's phone ringing wildly. For some reason, Carmilla liked how possessive Laura suddenly turned. The way she wanted Carmilla to be hers for the moment. She had to do something, right? She had to speak her mind, to confront the problem. Carmilla seriously considered confessing everything right there and then, when Laura kissed Carmilla's jaw and nuzzled her head into Carmilla's neck.

Carmilla laid there, completely stunned for a moment. What just happened? What was happening now? Carmilla sighed, and decided not to overthink it, because really she doubts that she'll never understand this girl. From the music choice, to the creepy abandoned building, to the random grinding in the house to the sudden change in personality- she'd never be able to keep up. She gazed into the stars, smiling softly to herself, content with having the tiny girl in her arms.

Maybe Halloween isn't so bad. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos!


	18. Fight Club

**Carmilla**

 

It's been nearly a few weeks since that whole entire almost-sex incident happened, and a week since their probably not platonic moment on Halloween. And like all their intimate moments, they pretended it never happened. Thankfully, JP was the only one to find out about their _almost_ incident. And he has not stopped bothering Carmilla about it, sending her random texts with pictures of him reenacting Carmilla's face when she was caught, bringing it up in random conversation. Even going so bold as to when Laura would some times visit to say it in a cheesy innuendo. As humorous as it was Carmilla, it was also a reminder of what could have been, and that what she was feeling for Laura was mutual... She thinks. She's never been good at the guessing game.

Carmilla's phone suddenly buzzed, and she groaned. She was in the middle of a conversation with Mircalla on why ethics are for children- and she was making fantastic points about it. _Another day, I guess._

Carmilla grabbed her phone from the coffee table and stroked Mircalla's fur with the other.

**Puppy-Dog Kirsch, Xena, Ginger 1, Ginger 2, Cupcake, JP**

_**Ginger 2:**  Hey gang! I was wondering if we could all hang out again._

_**Carmilla:** Gang? _

_**Xena:** Since when are we a gang?_

_**Ginger 2:** I didn't mean it like THAT_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** I wanna be in a gang!_

_**Xena:** Of course you do..._

_**Ginger 1:** We can be a gang_

_**Carmilla:** Perry has a point_

_**Cupcake:** We'd be the flimsiest gang ever_

_**Ginger 2:** NOT THE POINT GUYS_

_**Xena:** Empress of the snark started it_

_**Carmilla:** I'm not the one that listed us as a "gang"_

_**Cupcake:** We could be tho_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** We should be! _

_**Cupcake:** What would our name be?_

_**Carmilla:** The dimwit squad_

_**Cupcake:** HAHAHA_

_**Ginger 1:** That's actually quite fitting..._

_**Ginger 2:** CAN WE GO BACK TO THE POINT_

_**Xena:** What were we talking about again?_

_**Ginger 2:** I was wondering if we could all hang out again_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** I'd be down_

_**Cupcake:** Me too_

_**Xena:** Sounds like a plan_

_**Ginger 1:** I'll bake healthy snacks!_

_**Carmilla:** DON'T YOU DARE  
_ _**Carmilla:** I'm up for it as long as Fred Weasley doesn't bring healthy alternatives_

_**Ginger 1:** Oh please don't tell me that's still not my contact name..._

_**Carmilla:** No._

_**Ginger 1:** Thank god_

_**Carmilla:**  Instead, you've upgraded to Ginger 1_

_**Cupcake:** HAHAHAHA_

_**Ginger 2:** Why can't I be Ginger 1?_

_**Carmilla:** Because you're not a lyrical genius_

**Ginger 2:** ....  
**Ginger 2:** Back to the point  
**Ginger 2:** We should all hang out again

_**Xena:** Where would we go?_

_**Ginger 2:** *points to Carmilla*_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** *also points to Carmilla*_

_**Cupcake:** *joins this pointing*_

_**Ginger 1:** *may or may not be pointing to Carmilla*_

_**Carmilla:**  ....  
**Carmilla:** Do you guys want to have it at my place?_

_**Cupcake:** Yeah!_

_**Ginger 2:** Oh how kind of you to offer!_

_**Ginger 1:** Of course Carmilla!_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** Ya!!!!_

_**Xena:** I guess_

_**Carmilla:** Glad to be of service. What time?_

_**JP:** Did you just offer up our home?_

_**Cupcake:** Hey JP!_

_**Ginger 2:** He arises!_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** The man himself!_

_**Carmilla:** I'm literally one room away from you... All u have to do is walk over and ask..._

_**JP:** And last time walking in didn't blow over so well_

_**Xena:** Oh do tell_

_**Carmilla:** Nothing happened_

_**Ginger 2:** I'm curious_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** Ooo there's beef in the chat_

_**JP:** (1 Attachment)_

_**JP:** Let's just say Carmilla looked like that_

_**Xena:** GOLD. PURE. GOLD_

_**Ginger 1:** LOL_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** HAHAHAHHA BRO _

_**Ginger 2:** My my. What were you doing Carmilla?_

_**JP:** More like who..._

_**Carmilla:** I hate you. _

_**Ginger 2:** Is it just me or has Laura turned awfully quiet? _

_**JP:** Interesting point Lafontaine_

_**Cupcake:** Sorry! I was eating_

_**JP:**  Fascinating word choice, Laura.  
**JP:** Carmilla. Care to comment_

_**Cupcake:** JP!_

_**Xena:**  JP here always to remind us of the unmindful confessions Laura makes_

_**Ginger 2:** You've really set yourself up for that one Laura..._

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** I agree that was totally ur fault Laura_

_**Cupcake:** ...   
**Cupcake:** U guys are mean_

_**JP:** You were the one eating something (one)_

_**Cupcake:** JP!!!!!_

_**Ginger 2:** I'm having fun. This is a fun time._

_**Ginger 1:** Poor Laura..._

_**Cupcake:**  Thank you Perry. At least someone in this group HAS sympathy_

_**Ginger 1:** Though I bet she's probably happy after "eating"..._

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** OH MY GOD_

_**Xena:** WHAT A COMEBACK. WHAT A COMMENT. WHAT A SURPRISE. 10/10_

_**Laura:** Lo. La. Perry._

_**Ginger 2:** Omfg  
**Ginger 2:** This is too good_

**Carmilla:** ANYWAYS.  
**Carmilla:** My place at 7, yeah?   
**Carmilla:** And thanks for the treat cupcake ;)

_**Ginger 2:** Was that a confession?_

_**Xena:**  o shit_

_**Puppy-Dog Kirsch:** YOOOOOOO_

Carmilla chuckled and put her phone down, a string of vibrations and texts following. She'd read them at a later point. Right now, she needed to prep her apartment for this gathering, and prep herself for Laura. If she was not sure if Laura liked her back, she might as well flirt and give it her all. 

Even if she can't claim victory.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

"Babe. It's just Carmilla's apartment." They said, banging their head back against the door.

"I know that." Perry replied, applying the last of her makeup. "But during my job I can't dress up how I want to. Dressing like a school teacher gets old fast." Perry added, finishing off her red lipstick.

"Laura's even ready- and she takes forever." They retaliated, shoving their hands in their pockets. Perry pulled up her hair into a ponytail and smacked her lips together. Lafontaine would be lying if they said Perry's efforts didn't go to a great cause, because wow she looks amazing tonight. But they couldn't get distracted. They were determined to pull information from JP about Laura and Carmilla since either of them won't talk. Ask Carmilla, and you get a string of sass and snarky comments. Ask Laura, and it's all blushing and rambles.

"I'm ready." Perry said with excitement. Lafontaine smiled, and took Perry's hand.

"Finally." They muttered under their breath. The two walked out of the bathroom to greet Laura, who sat perched up on the couch. Laura wore a short sleeved button-up blue colored shirt with bowties on them that was tucked into grey jeans accompanied by her typical flats. They rolled their eyes. It was so blatantly obvious she's trying to impress Carmilla, and it kills them that Laura always manages to avoid Lafontaine's questions.

"Ah! Finally she's ready." Laura said, hopping off the couch. Perry huffed and hooked her arm into Lafontaine's.

"First of all, I didn't take that long. Second of all, rude!" Lafontaine laughed, earning a pointed look from Perry. She had the expression of a pissed off Chihuahua, and it looked adorable.

"Alright, alright. I'm sorry." They said, trying to keep the peace. Perry smiled. 

"You're lucky you're cute. You know how I love this shirt on you." She said, tugging a the collar of Lafontaine's gray tee.

"I know. That's why I wore it." 

"Can you two stop gushing over each other so we can go?" Laura said, reminding Lafontaine that she was there. They smiled and nodded, and the trio walked out of the apartment.

"So, you trying to impress your lady friend?" Lafontaine teased, wriggling their eyebrows at Laura. Laura replied with an ovredramatic scoff and a cross of her arms. No amount of scoffing and sass behavior could hide the blush that reached her cheeks.

"She's all of our lady friend." Laura declared, holding her head a bit higher. And, wait for it... "Besides. She wouldn't notice if I put it any effort. I could have my hair dyed blue and she wouldn't notice. And how rude of you to believe I'm dressing up to simply impress her? Maybe I'm trying to impress everyone. Or no one at all. I am definitely not trying to singularly impress Carmilla. All my friends' opinions matter! It's silly of you to think other wise." Lafontaine rolled their eyes as the tiny girl continued to ramble on for what could have been hours.

She's totally head over heels for Carmilla. 

 

**Danny**

 

She made sure no one was looking when she grabbed Kirsch's hand. She wasn't one for public affection, but he was so adorable when he looked lost that Danny couldn't help it.

"Kirsch. We're heading in the right direction." Danny assured. He nodded and laced their fingers together, still looking a little unsure. Danny huffed and pulled out her phone. In some way Danny took that offensively, as she felt the need to prove him wrong yet secure his concern. She typed in the address into Google Maps, showing they were on the right path. She shoved the screen in his face. "See? We're good." Kirsch smiled, and nodded a bit more eagerly this time.

"You know, we might be a little late since I got us lost earlier." Danny scoffed. 

"Yeah. I know- that's why we had to ask for directions in the first place." Kirsch stifled a snicker, and Danny knew he was onto something.

"There's only one way to make it on time." Danny cocked her eyebrow. "FIRST ONE THERE WINS!" Kirsch exclaimed, darting down the street. She was stunned for a moment as she watched her good for a boyfriend sprint down the street. But Danny was quick to recover, and bolted out of him. He had strength, but not enough stamina. This was going to be an easy win for Danny. Still; Kirsch always challenged her the way no one had, the only person to ever make her doubt her ability to win. That's part of the reasons why she loved Kirsch so much;

Because he was an actual challenge. 

Soon enough Danny caught up to Kirsch, and they were running side by side, their long strides moving in unison now. Kirsch noticed, and tried to pick up his pace. They still had a long ways to go before they made it, so Danny knew she had to preserve her energy. She watched as Kirsch took pride as he was a few strides ahead, perking up a bit. Danny seriously considered letting him win, but then again there was no chance in hell she'd do that.

Once turning the corner to Carmilla's street, Danny picked up her pace; elongating and quickening her strides. Before he could even think about winning Danny had moved far ahead of him. She heard his heavy panting as she made it to Carmilla's apartment, slapping her hand to the door. Kirsch made it to her a few seconds after, panting heavily and leaning his hands on his knees.

"Not..." He took a large breath. "Fair bro." Danny smiled and laughed what she could before needing to breath again. She leaned against the door with one hand, resting her forehead to her arm for a moment. 

"What's my prize for winning?" She said once she regained some of her stamina. Kirsch shrugged and stood up straight.

"A kiss." He said, wriggling her eyebrows. Danny smiled.

"I'll take it." Kirsch placed his hands on Danny's hips and pulled her into a kiss. She smiled and placed her hands on his shoulders, when the door opened. 

"Gross." Carmilla said, looking tiny compared to the two giants towering over her. Kirsch laughed uncomfortably and Danny smiled.

"Fang face."

"Xena." 

"Awe, gonna treat your old pal Carmilla that way?" Carmilla pouted with fake hurt. Danny rolled her eyes and pulled herself away from Kirsch. Danny moved past Carmilla and into her large apartment. "No please, come in." Carmilla said sarcastically as Kirsch moved in after Danny. Danny loved annoying Carmilla; especially since she was so easily irritated. Danny spotted JP grabbing a grape soda from the fridge, and smiled mischievously. She hasn't forgot the string of texts from before, and she was determined to know what happened.

"Hey JP!" Danny greeted with a wave.

"Yo! JP!" Kirsch said after. JP waved before popping open his soda can.

"Are you joining us on this fine evening?" He shook his head and took a drink from the soda can.

"Sadly, no. I have a lab report to finish. But I'd love to stay and chat for a couple of minutes." He leaned against the counter, and Danny knew Carmilla was glaring a hole through the back of her head.

"So those texts from early were very interesting. I'm curious to know what happened." Danny said. 

"Oh oh! Me too!" Kirsch hopped in, moving his hand to the small of Danny's back. JP smirked, and looked behind them to Carmilla.

"Now that was quite interesting indeed. You wouldn't believe what my eyes fell upon." He replied, taking a large sip of his drink.

"Do tell." Danny crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows. 

"Well, I was simply coming back from a night out drinking with a couple of lads, when I returned to my humble abode with Lafontaine. Now, I was a bit tipsy if I do say so myself, but worry not because this image is burned into my brain. No amount of alcoholic beverages would be able to wash away this memory. So, I announced my presence as I always do, but was a bit worried when I didn't get a response. In a rush of concern, I move to Carmilla's door, and when I opened it, when I-" JP suddenly looked down at his wrist, pretending to see a watch, leaving Kirsch and Danny on the edge of their seats. "Oh, silly me! I must go back to studying. Ta ta!" He said, scurrying back to his room.

"I bet Carmilla saw ta tas." Kirsch muttered. Danny bursted out laughing and Carmilla punched Kirsch's shoulder. 

 

**Laura**

 

The three finally arrived at Carmilla's apartment, and Laura couldn't be happier. Perry and Lafontaine were particularly gushy tonight, and she didn't know how much more she can take. (Especially when she's wondering what it would be like to act like that with Carmilla). Laura knocked on the door a few times before Carmilla answered. Laura's jaw nearly dropped when she saw Carmilla.

Carmilla's hair was tossed up into a ponytail, and it should be illegal with how well she was pulling it off. She had on a button up peach-colored shirt with some black lace over the shoulders. She wore tight black short shorts, knee-high black stockings, and black boots. Laura cleared her throat and recollected herself before she started drooling.

"Like what you see, cutie?" Carmilla said coolly, leaning her shoulder against the doorframe. Heat rushed to Laura's cheeks. _This week on: I (Almost) Got Away With It._

"I... Um..." Laura could barely form words at this point. Does she say she looks good? Because yeah, she does. She looks fantastic. "You look-"

"You look great Carmilla. Now stop making Laura flustered and let us in." Carmilla snickered and moved so Lafontaine and Perry could sneak by her. Laura looked down at her feet.

"You look really gorgeous tonight, Carm." Laura said before rushing past Carmilla. She couldn't deal with the aftermath of that. 

Laura walked up the stairs as ungraceful as you can imagine without tripping, and finally landed on secure flooring. Kirsch and Danny seemed to be in some sort of a competition to see who can chug soda down the fastest on the floor, both glaring at each other with determination. Some pop station was playing from the TV, and Laura almost wishes there wasn't. Last time, they both ended up in a bedroom. And Carmilla has been particularly flirtatious this past week, and Laura has to stop herself from imagining where that could lead.

Perry and Lafontaine settled on the couch and wrapped their fingers together. Well, at least Laura didn't have to be the third wheel anymore. 

She turned to say something to Carmilla, but whatever she said was forgotten because Carmilla was standing only a few inches from her, their bodies nearly touching. Carmilla's dark eyes stared wickedly into Laura's for a moment, a smirk playing on her lips. They stared at a each other for a few moments, then Carmilla brushed her finger under Laura's chin and walked away. Laura blinked a few times and gulped. _What the hell was that?_ She shook it away and joined the others.

Kirsch slammed his hand on the table and crushed his soda can as Danny finished the last of hers.

"Ha! I beat you!" Danny wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. 

"Best two out of three."

"Deal." The two went at it again, and Laura smiled and shook her head to herself. She played with the buttons on her shirt, unbuttoning the top one and buttoning it repeatedly. She flattened out the collar to her shirt, played with her belt here and there. Laura didn't know why she felt so nervous tonight. Maybe it was because Carmilla dressed the way she did, or maybe it's because the last party things happened. Laura sighed and flattened out her collar again. She lifted her gaze from the ground to see Carmilla staring at her from the lounge chair, that same smirk and dark eyes still there. Laura gulped. Or maybe it's because she's looking at her like _that._

Carmilla patted the seat next to her and scooted over, gesturing for Laura to sit. Laura nodded, and made her way to the lounge chair. Laura propped herself next to Carmilla, nervously fidgeting with her fingers. Carmilla rested her arm on the back of the chair, almost laying down but not quite. Laura felt her intense gaze on her, and she was nervous to look back.

"You too." Carmilla said. Laura furrowed her eyebrows, and finally turned to face Carmilla.

"What?" 

"You look gorgeous too, Laura." Laura blushed immediately and looked back down to her fingers.

"Thanks, Carm." Carmilla hardly ever used Laura's name, but when she did it had an effect on Laura that she wasn't too proud of. Laura, despite being a nervous wreck, scooted closer to Carmilla. Her eyes secretly trailed along Carmilla's toned legs, but she snapped them back when she felt Carmilla's hand gently brush against her shoulder.

"Are you alright?" _No. You look really hot tonight and it's making me a hot mess._ Laura nodded and met Carmilla's gaze with a smile.

"I'm alright." Carmilla smiled, and brushed some hair out of Laura's face, and she really wishes she wasn't looking at her the way she was right now because it's killing her.

"Good." She tucks the strand of hair behind Laura's ear carefully, and Laura feels in awe at how tender Carmilla was being at this moment. 

"Carmilla!" Kirsch called out, breaking her concentration on Laura. Carmilla looked to the shouting puppy dog. "Come on- truth or dare?" Carmilla rolled her eyes, and moved her hand back to the back of the lounge chair.

"Are you serious? This games for children." Carmilla replied.

"Awe, come on grumpy cat. For old times sake." Kirsch said. Carmilla rolled her eyes again.

"Fine. Truth." Danny and Kirsch exchanged a glance, and he grinned.

"What was JP talking about earlier when he said he walked in on something?" Laura stilled, and so did Carmilla. Laura felt the heat rush to her cheeks and she looks back down to her fidgeting hands.

"I had a girl in my room." Carmilla replied in a low voice.

"Oh! I totally called it!" Kirsch held his hands out for a high-five, looking to everyone to see if he got any reciprocation. No one cared enough to do so, and he slowly pulled his hands back down, looking like a kicked puppy. Laura saw Danny discreetly turn her hand over, and Kirsch slapped it. He perked up again from the small gesture. _Too cute._

"Okay, Perry. Truth or dare?" Carmilla said, passing the attention to Perry.

"Dare."

"I dare you to scream like a banshee." The game continued for a while, but there were only ever two directions that Truth or Dare went in;

There was one. One being that everyone turned horny and things got crazy, or two.  
Two being the game grew dull and everyone started to run out of ideas. In this case, it was number two. 

"D-Bear. I dare you to... Um... Chug this can of soda." Kirsch said. Danny rolled her eyes.

"Already did that." The group groaned in unison.

"Okay, this is getting boring." Lafontaine said. 

"Agreed. We need to do something to make this more exciting." Carmilla added. The attention turned to her. 

"Whatcha got in mind?" Danny asked. Carmilla smirked.

"We need some sort of punishment, or something to be at stake." She paused, and everyone waited for her to continue. "If you don't do a dare or aren't able to complete one, then you have to spin a bottle, and whoever it lands on gets to do whatever they want to do to you- within reason of course." Laura's heart picked up at that. "And if the group suspects you're not telling the truth, then you have to scream some ridiculous phrase whilst running down the street." Everyone made grunts and nods in agreement. "Excellent."

The game turned intense after that, and 15 minutes later + Perry having to shout that Sarah Palin is a scientific genius while running down the street, it was now Laura's turn.

"So, cupcake. Truth or dare?" Carmilla said in her low, raspy voice. Laura gulped at the stare Carmilla was giving her.

"Dare." Carmilla smiled and bit her bottom lip. This was risky- so risky knowing what could come out of Carmilla's mouth. But Laura was feeling bold at that particular moment, and for some reason wanted to impress Carmilla. So she was determined to complete a dare.

"I dare you..." Carmilla rubbed the top of Laura's forearm gingerly, causing goosebumps to rise on Laura's skin. "To spin a bottle, and whoever it lands on, they get to do whatever they want to you." Laura gulped.

"But... That's the punishment."

"So is that a no?" 

"No I-"

"Then get to it." Carmilla cut off with that same pleased smirk she's been carrying throughout the night. Laura narrowed her eyes at Carmilla.

"Oh you're too cruel."

"There are worse things to be." Laura rolled her eyes and slid off the lounge chair, grabbing an empty water bottle and setting it up on the table. Laura's tongue peeks out of the corner of her mouth in concentration as she set up the bottle. Well, here goes nothing. The bottle spun around for what seemed to be forever, but it finally came to a stop. Laura's eyes widened at who it landed on.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla couldn't contain the excitement that came in her stomach when the bottle landed on her. Truly, she wasn't expecting it to. She was humored with the idea of it landing on someone else, only imagining what embarrassing things they could make Laura do. Laura slowly turned around to meet Carmilla's dark gaze, and she enjoyed watching the girl squirm.

But what to do with her?

Carmilla didn't want to make Laura do anything she's not comfortable with, but at the same time her thoughts were going wild with the possibilities. A silence had fallen on the room, and Carmilla and Laura stared at each other with such an intensity that it was nearly palpable. The others must have caught on, but it only seemed like Laura was there in that moment. Carmilla, not being able to handle the anticipation, just babbled the first thing that came to her mind.

"Get me a water." Carmilla wasn't thirsty- far from it. But she needed to calm herself down and get some alleviation before she bursted. Laura shrugged and pushed herself off the ground. Everyone stared at Carmilla with disbelief as Laura went to the kitchen, but Carmilla simply gave a "what" look to them all. That was too intense, and right now she wishes the intensity would just go away because it's suffocating.

 

**Laura**

 

Somewhere in the night, they had decided to visit a club. The crew sat around a booth in the far corner. Danny, Kirsch, Lafontaine, and Perry were all downing shots while Carmilla and Laura lived in their own little bubble. Laura sat on Carmilla's lap, her arms wrapped around her shoulders, Carmilla's arm around Laura's waist, the other tucking Laura's hair behind her ear. They both could say that it was the alcohol, but in reality Carmilla hadn't drank the whole night and Laura had barely a sip of beer. 

Laura just felt so infatuated with Carmilla. Ever since Halloween, things were different between the two. Well, they were different before Halloween. But on the particular holiday things got deeper between them. It was like they were dating, but not quite. Laura's turned down a few girls mainly for Carmilla, and she knows Carmilla stopped sleeping around. They were a thing, she thinks. She's not even sure if Carmilla likes her back or if she's just imagining she does.

"You doing okay cupcake?" Carmilla asked, letting her hand rest on Laura's cheek. Laura nodded. Would this be a good time to just ask? She's getting really sick and tired of ignoring whatever's going on between them. But she can't talk about that here of all places. Even then, how does she even begin? We kissed a bunch of times and I'm really confused on what we are? We almost had sex so what's going on? This isn't just a fling to me? The possibilities were endless. "Do you want to step outside?" An idea sparked in her head. She could do it outside, right? That's a good idea.

"Yeah. I think I'd like that." Laura clambered off of Carmilla's lap and hooked her arms in Carmilla's. The girls made their way past the crowds and out the doors, the cold autumn air hitting their cheeks. Carmilla now was wearing a leather jacket, and gave Laura her black hoodie before they left her apartment. Laura took a deep breath. She has to do this. She's tired of just sitting around, wondering, hell to even try and figure this out she's been talking to a random girl in class (thank god for Betty though really). She's been running to anyone but Carmilla about this, and maybe it's time for her to actually say something.

"So, uh. Can I talk to you about something?" Laura said, shoving her hands into the pocket of the hoodie. Carmilla shrugged and leaned against the wall.

"Go for it cutie." She replied. Laura fiddled with Carmilla's slender hand in hers. Was she ready to finally confront what they've been avoiding for weeks? It would be easier to just say something else and leave it at that. Ignoring it further would certainly help her nerves now, but she knows that she'll be kicking herself in the ass later if she didn't say anything. Laura took a deep breath. _Here goes nothing._

"Carmilla I-"

"Hey there hot stuff." A low voice cut her off. Laura slowly lifted her gaze to her right to see a large man, clearly intoxicated. He had a buzzed hair cut, a white tank top, and saggy blue jeans. He just screamed trouble, and Laura was immediately terrified.

"I'm sorry?" Laura replied, also angry at the man for killing her moment between Carmilla and her. The man hiccupped, and grabbed Laura's arm.

"I saw you in there. Come with me." The man tightened his grip and started to pull Laura away. Panic started to set in Laura as well as anger. Laura hated this- she hated it. Laura yanked her arm away from the man's grip. 

"No." The man seemed to take this as offense. His eyes burned and jaw clenched. Laura's heart started to pound. He can easily dominate her- she's fucked.

"You're coming with me." He growled. The large man reached for her arm again, but Carmilla whacked it away. She stood between Laura and the large man.

"Leave her alone." Carmilla said in a low voice. He scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"Get out of my way, bitch." He threatened, taking a step closer. Laura gripped tightly on the back of Carmilla's jacket, terrified of the drunken man before them.

"Make me." She snapped back. His hands pawed after her, but in a split second her fist hit him square in the jaw. The man stumbled back a bit, the force so strong that he backed up nearly four steps before falling on his ass. Carmilla cracked her neck and dusted off her shoulder where the man had barely grabbed her. "Fucker." She spat out. 

"Jesus Carmilla!" Laura exclaimed, watching in horror as the man tried to get up, but fell back down on his ass again. Carmilla popped her jacket, faking a hostile step forward, making the man crawl back, a bruise clearly starting to form on his jaw. 

"Can you take me away from this sorry excuse of a man before I tear his lungs out from his body?" Carmilla snarled, her body clearly itching to throw in another punch. Laura intertwined her hand in Carmilla's and started tugging her away.

"Alright, okay." Laura said calmly. She started dragging Carmilla through the empty streets, hearing a few drunken shouts from the attacking (or rather, the attacked) man. "You shouldn't have done that." Laura grumbled, feeling an anger at how reckless Carmilla just was.

"Oh I should have." Carmilla replied, frustration clear in her tone.

"Carmilla. You could have been hurt." She snapped back. "Seriously hurt. What if he managed to get a hold of you?"

"He didn't."

"But what if he did?" She said. "That was stupid. You could have been seriously hurt."

"You could have been hurt too." She suddenly snapped back, stopping dead in her tracks. Laura soon stopped a few steps ahead of her, crossing her arms and turning on her heel to look at Carmilla.

"Are you not listening, Carmilla? You could have been hurt!" God, it's like her words were bouncing off a wall and back into her mouth.

"So? He was after you, not me! You were the one that cowered behind me!" Laura dropped her jaw.

"I cowered behind you? You stepped in!" Laura shook her head. "Not the point. How could you be so reckless like that?" 

"Because you could have been hurt! I wasn't going to sit by and let that happen!" Their voices were raising at a crescendo, each exchange louder than the last. "I wasn't going to let him injure you in anyway."

"I'm not some defenseless flower! I could have handled it myself."

"Clearly." She said, her voice ridden with sarcasm. Laura clenched her jaw and squinted at Carmilla.

"I could have." She growled through her clenched teeth.

"Why are you yelling at me when I defended you?" 

"Because he could have done something to you! He could have been carrying a knife for all you know! You were so reckless, and for what? For me? I could have done it myself."

"I wasn't going to let him do anything to you."

"You were out of your league."

"Doesn't matter." Laura shifted her jaw back and forth, her anger both subsiding and growing. She doesn't understand why Carmilla would ever do that for her, why she would put herself at risk like that. Was she always this reckless? This self-destructive? 

"Don't do that again." Laura spat out. Carmilla sighed, and ran her hand through her hair.

"If I don't, do you promise you'll stop being angry with me? Which I find ridiculous, by the way, because I literally just saved your whiny ass." Laura rolled her eyes at the dexterity of this girl, how persistent she is to refuse to believe she did any wrong.

"Fine. Whatever." Laura huffed, and ran her hand through her hair. "Do it again, Carmilla. Be reckless like that again and you'll see a whole new wave of angry." Laura threatened as an after thought.

"Fine. Won't save your life ever again, your majesty." Carmilla said, bowing with anything but respect.

"Oh my god!" Laura exclaimed. "Have you listened to a word I said! You were reckless! I am asking you not to put your life in danger like that again! I-" Laura shook her head, her hands angrily flailing through the air with her words. "You know what? Never mind. Believe whatever you want. I'll see you tomorrow." Laura turned around on her heel and started storming the ways to her apartment.

"Where are you going?" Carmilla called, following her suit.

"I'm going back to my apartment." Laura replied, not bothering to look at her as she spoke. 

"Let me walk you back." 

"No." Laura refused, picking up her pace. But the height difference really showed then, because all Carmilla had to do was lengthen her stride a bit and she matched Laura's steps. _Curse me and my tiny legs_. Laura affronted her genetics and her build, wishing then she wasn't so small.

"I'm walking you home anyways." Laura clenched her jaw. _If she's going to play this game, I might as well play a game of my own_. Laura stopped in her tracks, Carmilla stopping to a halt beside her.

"Fine then. If you insist on spending so much time with me, wanna talk about what the hell is going on between us?" She watched as Carmilla's expression dropped, her eyes panicked and jaw slightly dropped surprised. 

"What do you-"

"You know what I mean." Laura cut off. Carmilla stood shell shocked and dumbfounded, much to Laura's victory. _Please say something._ Pleaded a voice in Laura's head, pushing past her anger. "Need a friendly reminder?" Laura said, her anger taking over again. She cupped Carmilla's cheek and leaned up on her tippy toes, joining her lips with Carmilla's. Reluctantly, Laura pulled back, mad at herself for her heart pounding so harshly. Carmilla still stood dumbfounded as Laura crossed her arms, waiting for her to say something. The silence terrified her, angered her, yet hurt her in a way. Silence meant that this didn't mean anything to her, meant that she didn't feel the same.

"No? I'm going home then." Laura pushed past Carmilla, making sure to bump Carmilla's shoulder with hers as she stormed off. _Screw her._ Laura thought to herself, trying to ignore the pang of regret in her chest.

_I don't need this._

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla could only watch as Laura stormed away down the nearly barren streets. She wasn't sure if she was angry, shocked, or broody- maybe a combination of all three. She wanted to chase after Laura, but her feet were weighed to the ground, anchored there. She's never seen such passion and fury in the girl's eyes- not like that. 

Her hand still ached from the punch landed on that sorry excuse for a man's jaw, her heart light from the kiss but heavy from watching Laura leave, knowing she's angry with her. Carmilla was confused as to why Laura had become so angered- she should have been thanking her. Carmilla prevented someone from hurting her, right? Had Carmilla not just save Laura? She doesn't understand what she did wrong, what she did to make Laura so angry. And she doesn't understand why she stood speechless, yet again, when Laura proved ready to talk about whatever the hell was going on between them. Words still failed her, her body refusing to move from the spot. 

The mind inside of her body seemed to be slowly drawing back to reality when she heard a familiar voice shout her name, clearly intoxicated. She blinked a few times, before turning her head to the source. Lafontaine and Perry were making their way to Carmilla, Lafontaine's steps much more drunken than their girlfriend's, who looked down right concerned. Carmilla sighed, and rubbed her hand over her knuckled, trying to soothe the ache. She couldn't deal with them right now. She just didn't have the patience. 

She found her feet starting to walk the path to her apartment. She just needed to be alone- just for a little while. When Carmilla got home, she planned, she'd completely ignore JP and lock herself in her room. Nothing would clear her head better than reading a book and shutting off the world and neglecting her feelings- just like she's used to doing.


	19. Would You Want To and Look What The Cat Dragged In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OHHHHHHH BOY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started writing a new fic like 2 weeks ago and I just uploaded the first chapter. I have most of the chapters set up I just need to edit them before I upload, so the schedule for this one might get a little weird due to trying to set up the other and writing this one as well, but I promise they will keep coming. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter!

**JP**

 

JP hated seeing Carmilla this way. She's looked so dull these past couple of days, her nose always buried in some book, door always locked unless she was at work. He doesn't know what happened, but he's guessing from the lack of communication between Laura and Carmilla, that it probably has to do with something that happened with her. But what? He thought things were going well- extremely well. From that little fiasco he walked in on to their little dance they did during Halloween, to the flirtatious touching when everyone had joined for a small gathering here, he thought it was going well.

He sighed, and picked up Mircalla, her face inches from his. He stared into her yellow eyes, looking extremely bored. _How do cats do this? Act so calm? What is their secret to not caring? And how can I learn?_ He knows not to pry; especially when it comes to Carmilla. But it seems whatever is going on she's not dealing with it well on her own, which only makes him want to step in even more, developing theories and hypotheses. 

How did he do it when they were teens? No, when they were teens she always came to him. But yet again, she had no where else to go. She always would look to him for guidance, but as the years passed she did that less and less, instead dealing with her problems by getting lost in a book, maybe an occasional conversation with JP.

He sighed once more, and let the cat go. JP looked to Carmilla's door, closed as it had been these past couple of days. He has to do something. Sitting around and hoping she'll figure out a way to deal with her issues won't progress; won't advance. JP pulled out his phone, scrolling through his contacts until he reached Laura's number. 

_**(Send)** Hey. Wassup?_

No, he can't start off with that. He deleted the text, and after some thought, tried again.

_**(Send)** Hey Laura. How are you? Haven't seen you around._

He deleted it again. That's too straightforward. How could he find out what happened without really asking? Maybe he should just meet with Laura; get to know her on a more personal level. He hardly knows much about her outside of the conversations they've had together while hanging out in a group, but nothing one on one. He sighed.

_**JP:** Hey Laura. I'm bored- want to get some dinner?_

_**Laura:** I'm down. Tuesdays?_

_**JP:** Sounds good._

Her response was almost immediate, which told JP she must not be doing anything but doing this depressing brooding gig like Carmilla was. JP looked guiltily to the door. He shouldn't be going behind Carmilla's back like this, but he has to do something, figure out what is going on. He has to help- he can't stop himself.

JP pushed himself off the couch and snatched his coat. If Carmilla finds out, she's going to murder him.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch and Danny sat in his room in his frat house, Kirsch at his desk on his computer typing up an essay, Danny on his bed with her school work sprawled out every which way. The two had found that this was one of the best ways to spend time together while still being productive, and boy was Kirsch glad that Danny had figured this out. They had some classes together, but not enough. And on top of trying to become the leader, and Danny being a lit TA, finding time to spend together was getting harder and harder. So, it was the moments like this that Kirsch appreciated the most.

"So when do you want to make a surprise visit at Carmilla's work?" Danny asked suddenly, her pen scribbling down a hundred words a second. Kirsch pondered over it for a second, going over his schedule in his head.

"Maybe this Sunday or something?" He offered.

"Sounds good." Kirsch smiled, and went back to his school work. It wasn't long before Danny started speaking again. "Do you think I should get a job?" Kirsch felt a twist to his stomach. A job would mean less time to spend together, and they barely have time now. He slowly turned in his swivel chair to face her, watching as she sat cross-legged, her brows knit in that cute way he loves when she's focused.

"If you want to." Kirsch replied. He knew he couldn't dictate whether she got a job like that because he'd miss her, so he did his best to answer truthfully. "Why?" He asked. Danny shrugged, playing with her ponytail for a moment.

"I..." She paused for a moment as she seemed to think over something. She pursed her lips together, and moved her work off her lap. Danny lifted her gaze so her electric blue eyes locked with his, and he could tell there was something big on her mind. "Never mind. Just curious." This set off a low panic inside Kirsch as he wondered if he did something wrong, but it was immediately replaced with concern as Danny looked sadly back down to her work. Kirsch looked around, wondering how he could make her feel better. He smiled, and grabbed a piece of paper. 

_You look really beautiful with a ponytail._

He wrote down quickly. Kirsch then proceeded to fold up the paper into a paper airplane, and tossed it her way. It hit her right on the forehead, causing her to flinch.

"Kirsch. What the-" But she stopped when she spotted his lopsided grin, and with a roll to her eyes, she opened up the paper airplane. Kirsch's heart fluttered when he saw the small smile that formed on her lips. She wrote down something back, re-folding it into the paper airplane and tossing it back at him. Kirsch caught it in one hand, and they exchanged smiles before he opened it back up.

_Dork._

Kirsch chuckled quietly, and they continued like that, writing insults and compliments back and forth. Once Danny was all smiles, he decided to figure out what was on her mind.

"So why do you want a job?" He asked, subtly tapping his pen on his desk. Danny sighed, and shrugged sluggishly, her electric blue eyes gazing into his.

"I..." She sighed once more. "Do you ever think... Would you ever... Have you thought about buying an apartment?" His eyebrows shot way to his hairline in surprise. That was unexpected. Kirsch crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair as he crossed one leg over the other.

"Dunno. Maybe. If I can, you know? I'm not sure how it will fly with this whole entire frat house thing." He replied truthfully. Danny sighed, and nodded. _What does she mean by that?_ He tried piecing it together in his mind, wondering why she would ask him that. A job for her? Apartment for him? How do those two things connect? "Why?" He asked, his mind reeling. 

"I was thinking... Maybe... We could move in together or something. If you wanted to... Would you want to move in together?" _Oh._ Kirsch was taken by surprise- greatly. Did he want to move in with her? Of course he does. That would ensure more time with her. Wait a second, she wanted to move in with him? Wait even more seconds, moving in together? Isn't that a big step forward? Kirsch wasted no time in going back to his computer, opening up google. "Are you just going to ignore me like that?" Danny snapped, though there was clear hurt in her tone. Kirsch met her soft eyes, and felt the need to immediately aid her, because he was not going to ignore her.

"What? Of course not babe. I was about to start googling apartments." He saw her features light up, a smile smile replacing the frown.

"Really?" He nodded, and waved her over. 

"Come join me." They both smiled at each other for a moment, till she scooted towards the end of his bed, her long legs dangling off of it as he typed in 'Apartments in Styria'.

He'd totally be down for this.

 

**Laura**

 

When JP asked if she wanted to have dinner with him Laura was surprised to say the least. They've never really hung out just the two of them, but she was certainly not opposed to it. She needed an excuse to leave her apartment anyway. She's stayed there, locked inside for so long it actually felt like the walls were closing in on her, holding her captive like a prisoner. 

Now, she and JP sat quietly at their table, waiting for their food to be served. There were few words so far exchanged between the two, and she could already tell he had some other ulterior motive. One of the reasons she agreed was because she thought maybe Carmilla had sent him somehow, or that she asked him to do this. But as this little dinner date went on, it had proved false. She was getting desperate as Carmilla was avoiding her calls, her texts. Laura was still angry, in a way, because Carmilla didn't even take in what she said, instead passing it off as wondering why she wasn't grateful for Carmilla saving her. Which, now that she had time to think about it, she was. But she was still pissed that Carmilla had put herself in a position of danger just for the sake of Laura's safety, still pissed at how easily she had done it, how willing she was to be reckless. 

But Laura also felt guilty.

She felt guilty for kissing Carmilla, for yelling at her when she had just saved her, for yelling at her at all. She doesn't regret trying to talk about the _thing;_ in fact it made her angry that Carmilla still chose to ignore it. It made her upset as well, really she was just a boiling pot of emotions.

"Something on your mind?" JP suddenly asked, snapping Laura out of her daze. _God damn it; she got in my thoughts again_. Laura mustered up her best smile and shrugged.

"There always is." She replied with a sigh. Laura forgot how mentally exhausting social contact good be. She's lived in her own little cocoon of worry for so many days that it hadn't even occurred to her how exhausting this could be.

"What is it today?" He inquired, making some sort of origami figure with a napkin. Laura sighed heavily once more, her shoulders rising and falling with exaggeration.

"Not important." Laura said, waving it off. 

"It's important if something is bothering you." JP replied without missing a beat, his brown eyes fixated on the origami figure. _Is this guy always right?_ Laura folded her hands and twiddled with her thumbs. If she were to talk about this with anyone, JP would be the person. Despite the obvious of him being insanely smart, he's the closest to Carmilla. Plus, he was the one to walk in on Carmilla and Laura all those weeks ago; he must have some inclination somethings going on. He always seems to know.

"I..." How does she go about saying this? "Um." She swallowed nervously. "Do you remember when you walked in on..."

"If only I could be so lucky as to forget that image." Laura chuckled anxiously and nodded.

"Right, right. Um, so I just... I've been trying to talk about it with her, I guess. But she ignored it, so I decided to ignore it to. Then, um, I don't know if she told you this but we got into a fight I guess. Some guy was grabbing my arm and trying to get me to go with him, but Carmilla punched him in the face." She could tell by the slight arch to his eyebrow that that was news to him, so she continued. "I got angry because she went about it recklessly, but she was angry at me because she just basically saved me, but that made me angrier because she wasn't listening to what I was saying, and completely missed the point. Then I tried talking about what happened between us again, but she didn't say anything. Then we kinda stormed off in different directions, and she hasn't talked to me in days." She watched as his brain worked behind his eyes, quick to configure a question.

"Have you tried talking to her?"

"She's been ignoring all of my attempts." He nodded, the gears to his ingenious mind spinning. 

"She's sitting in the apartment, last time I checked. Want to come back with me? I can pretend we didn't go out at all, and you just stopped by." Laura's heart skipped a beat just at the thought. She wasn't expecting such a quick resolution, or expecting to be able to see Carmilla so at all. How would that even blow over? Laura chewed on her bottom lip. Well, she would go there, JP would do whatever it is he does, and Laura would talk to Carmilla. Could Carmilla still ignore her if she stood in front of her face at her door? That's what she did last time, when she confronted Carmilla about her sister, and that worked out great. Fantastic even. Laura nodded, ideas already sparking in her head.

"Yeah. I think I'd like that." JP nodded, and placed a perfectly-made origami cat on the table.

"After this dinner though- your problems are not more important than my food." Laura laughed.

"Agreed."

 

**Lafontaine**

 

They were relieved when they found Laura's room missing Laura, a note on the fridge saying she'd gone to dinner with JP. Laura had kept herself cooped up here for so long Lafontaine had seriously considered forcing Laura to get out of the house themselves, as all of Perry's attempts failed miserably. Not surprisingly, however, as all she did was bake brownies and say 'communication'. Laura didn't find that as adorable as Lafontaine did.

Lafontaine smiled when they saw Perry exit their room, clearly just waking up from a nap. 

"Hey there." Lafontaine greeted. Perry smiled a small smile, and waved.

"Hey sweetie." She greeted, moving to the fridge. She too saw the yellow post-it note, then opened the fridge. "So Laura is gone?"

"Yeah. Finally." They said, crossing their arms. Perry hummed in response, pulling out a tub of ice cream. Lafontaine raised their eyebrow, already suspicious. She was always health conscious- what was she doing? They watched with curiosity as she pulled a large spoon from the drawer, and popped open the tub of ice cream. She stared down into it as though she was staring into a void, then proceeded to stuff her face with ice cream. Although they were very amused, they were also very concerned.

"Uh, you good Perr?" Perry nodded.

"Oh yeah. Just very stressed." It was like she was in some sort of calm anger, like she could snap but at the same time she couldn't. They moved about this cautiously, not wanting to be the one that sets off whatever trigger waiting to explode.

"Um, you wanna tell me what it's about?" They asked, as she swallowed extreme amounts of ice cream. Perry shrugged and moved to the living room, cradling the ice cream like a football. 

"I don't know if I'd ever be able to handle having children." Lafontaine's eyebrows shot up in surprise. _Kids? Why is she worried about that?_ They followed her into the living room as she plopped down on a couch, lazily placing her feet on the arm of the couch.

"What do you mean by that?" They asked, lifting her legs momentarily so they could sit down, letting her legs fall back down onto their lap.

"I mean," she took a large spoonful of ice cream, "I don't know if I'd be able to handle kids. My job has me questioning that, you know? And one thing I've always dreamed of was having kids of my own, but sometimes I seriously just want to toss those kids into a trash bin. And that is definitely not motherly." Is she serious right now? Judging by the amount of ice cream she is stuffing her face with, they'd say so.

"Perry." They said softly, but firmly. "You do realize that half of your job is dealing with 25 screaming kids all at once, and the other dealing with a handful of kids at a time? That's completely different from being a mother; it's easier when they're your own." Perry simply shrugged, stuffing her face again. "Seriously Perr. You'd make a great mother, but even then you don't need to worry about that. You just gotta worry about the screaming children you have to deal with now, and not the ones you'll have. I mean, I don't know many people that can deal with them like you do. It's gonna be hard sometimes, yes. But that has nothing to do with how you'll fair as a mother." They felt relieved when they saw a small smile dance across Perry's lips.

"You mean that?" Lafontaine nodded.

"'Course I do. And I'm not just saying it either." Perry smiled softly, a twinkle in her eyes.

"You're honestly the best." She said.

"I know."

 

**Carmilla**

 

Whatever lackwit was banging on her front door was going to pay. She had just started to drift into sleep, finally after a sporadic sleep schedule. Angrily, Carmilla pushed off the bed, her steps emphasized to a stomp. Carmilla ignored the cat pawing at her legs, focused on taking her frustrations out on whoever was knocking on her door. She stormed down the stairs and flung her door open.

"What?" She growled. Warm brown eyes dissipated all her anger in a moments notice, her heart skipping a beat. 

"Uh, hey." Laura greeted. Carmilla's lips twitched into a smirk momentarily, taking in how adorable she looked just then. She wore blue jeans and a long beige coat, a scarf wrapping around her neck and pushed down below her chin. But it was gone in a moments notice as she remembered their last interaction, a pang of regret in her chest.

"Hey." Carmilla said breathlessly. Laura's cheeks were pink from the cold air outside, the November weather rushing into Carmilla's apartment like a tidal wave. What next? _Do you want to come in?_ She wasn't sure if she wanted Laura to come inside or not for personal reasons, but it was rather cold out. "Do you want to-"

"I'm not coming inside." Laura cut her off, eyes set with determination. Carmilla gulped nervously. She knew she was going to talk about it, confront her again. But could Carmilla actually speak this time? Or will she coward again? She noticed then how hard her heart was pounding as though it was trying to beat out of her chest and reach out to Laura.

"You should, you know. It's cold out." Carmilla managed to say, the biting wind keeping her present.

"Go to the park with me?" Laura said, her voice less stern than the last time she spoke. Carmilla doesn't know if she can do that, as it seems every time they go there, theres another event added to the "Do Not Discuss" list. Carmilla chewed on her bottom lip. But Laura's eyes looked so full and warm, that it was hard for Carmilla to say no. 

"I, um." She sighed, giving way to the honey brown eyes staring back at her. "Yeah. Just give me a sec." Carmilla paused on the first step up. "Come inside while your waiting." She added as an after thought, then rushed up the steps. Carmilla moved to her room and shut the door behind her, her heart racing. Can she do this? Can she finally be upfront and confess her feelings? Just the mere thought made her want to run away- which she basically just did. There was no reason for her to be in here; she had her leather jacket hanging up near the front door. It was just an excuse to calm her thrashing heart and panicked mind.

Carmilla looked around the room, and spotted her black hoodie. That's what she was wearing when they... Carmilla shook it off. She needed a reason as to why she ran in here in the first place, and that was her golden ticket. Carmilla moved to where the hoodie hung from the closet and slipped it on, then checked herself out in the mirror. She nearly cringed at the ghoul-like figure staring back at her.

Her hair was a mess, looking like a jungle of stray hair and tangled locks. Bags so dark under her eyes that they outshined any Chanel bag. Her skin was pale- paler than usual, like she was an undead fiend masquerading as one of the mortals. Yeah, she's going to have to fix that. Carmilla thanked whatever god there was that make up was invented; and hair brushes.

It bothered her that Laura had seen her in such a state, but she's sure she can make up for it by looking 10x hotter than she did before. The painful yanking of her hair was worth it when it became all smoothed out, her eyeliner perfect. Carmilla gave a curt nod to herself before opening the door, and was surprised when she saw Mircalla just sitting at the entrance, a note attached to her collar. Carmilla looked around, and noticed Laura simply sitting on the couch, her phone in hand, not paying any mind to Carmilla. _Did she do this?_

Carmilla bent down and stroked Mircalla's velvet-like onyx fur, watching it smooth out under her hand as she pulled the note attached to her collar. Carmilla unfolded it, and read the neat scribbles that belonged to Laura's handwriting.

_**Would you want to talk about it this way?** _

Talk about it this way? What does Laura mean by that? Carmilla glanced between Laura and her cat for a moment. God, this was stupid. But, Carmilla found herself venturing back into her room in looks for a pen. She snatched one from her desk and wrote back.

_Talk about what?_

She re-attached the note to Mircalla's collar, and sent her back to Laura. A few moments later, the cat lazily trotted back to Carmilla, revealing new writing to the note. 

**_What's going on between us._ **

Carmilla felt her heart start to pace as she sat down on her bed, her knee bobbing up and down. Was she ready to do that? Carmilla could technically walk out and pretend that this was never written down, that it never happened. She could just not reply, or... Or she could finally admit her feelings, or face them in the very least. She could try to get over this fear of being hurt again, of being betrayed. It's hard to do, but with Laura on the other end, with Laura being the one that she's doing this with... Could she? Carmilla clenched and unclenched her jaw, and pressed her pen to the paper. With shaky hands, she started to write a reply.

_I guess._

They played the game of passing the note back and forth using Mircalla, waiting for replies and receiving, Carmilla's heart racing, stomach twisting.

_**So what is going on?** _

_I don't know. You tell me._

**_I asked you first._ **

_I asked you second._

**_Well now I'm asking you third._ **

Children. They are behaving like children. Carmilla thought to herself. She didn't know how to reply, how to explain it. Does she just admit her feelings now? How does she go about doing this? No, if Laura's going to be straightforward and to the point, then she is too. Well, as much as she can without actually admitting her feelings- she doesn't know how she's going to do that.

_We almost had sex and we kissed a lot. Sound like what's happened?_

**_Well, yeah. ~~I mean~~ But does it mean anything to you?_ **

Carmilla's heart jumped into her throat. Mean anything to her? Of course it did. But does she mean it in the sense of Carmilla's feelings towards Laura? Or in another way?

_What do you mean?_

She waited anxiously as she sent Mircalla back out of her room, and listened as she heard the paper rustle outside. Could this be it? Carmilla drummed her fingers against her leg. How long does it take to write a damn reply? Finally, the cat walked in, as bored as ever. She jumped on Carmilla's bed, and she read the neatly written handwriting.

_**I mean, was it just for fun? ~~Do I~~ Or does it matter?** _

_I had a good time if that's what your asking._

**_That's not what I'm asking._ **

_Then what do you mean cupcake?_

**_I mean do you have any feelings for me? Like... When we were kids feelings._ **

Her heart beat a mile a second, as though it was trying to make a run for it. A voice screamed for her to run, to forget, to pretend, to shut her off. But another one told Carmilla to tell her the truth, to stay, to let her know what she's been feeling after all this time. The fear that the feelings won't be returned came into play, the aching feeling in her heart twisted inside. But yet again, what would happen if Laura were to have the same feelings? By chance, could she? Could someone amazing as her fall for someone as rotten as Carmilla? She couldn't, right? She should just run... Or should she? She chewed on her bottom lip, weighing her options.

Once she favored more than the other, she started to write down a reply.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Perry was in a much better mood now, much to Lafontaine's relief. The tub of ice cream was back in the fridge, and instead replaced by a neat display of cut-up apples. The two watched a TV show mindlessly now. They weren't even sure what, just one thing was running through their mind; 

Having kids with Perry.

Of course, scientifically, it was now possible, so that's not what they were worried about. What was running through their mind was the surprise that they actually wanted to. They were only 20, but the thought of having kids and being married to Perry already seemed like the most natural wonder in the world. They pictured owning a nice house with Perry with a big backyard. They'd be standing on the porch, watching as the children played some sort of game. They'd talk about all that they've gone through to be where they were now, all the stories they've shared, the time they got married. 

The thought just felt so absolutely right to Lafontaine. Whenever it comes to Perry, everything just feels absolutely right. To be perfectly honest, they've flirted with the thought of marrying Perry more than once. But it was always interrupted by a thought of schoolwork, or one of their friends- really anything. Perry and Lafontaine had never talked about marriage or anything of that sort, but they've always wanted to. Lafontaine opened their mouth and closed it again. How do they go about saying this?

"Hey Perr." They settled with. She hummed in response, captivated by the TV. They pursed their lips side to side for a moment, trying to pull their thoughts together. "Have you ever thought of... I don't know... Getting married?" Their heart skipped a beat in their chest as they waited anxiously for her reply.

"To you?"

"Yeah. To me." Perry chuckled, sending down Lafontaine a trail of confusion and a tad bit of concern.

"I thought that was obvious?" Lafontaine cocked their eyebrow.

"What?" They said quietly.

"Yeah. From telling each other that we're perfect for each other and to the 'we're never breaking up'... I thought that meant we were bound to get married some day." They felt a weight lift off their chest, their heart fluttering.

"Really?" They said with a smile.

"Uh, yeah you goof." Lafontaine beamed at Perry until her bright blue eyes met theirs.

"So, one day, would you want to get married?" 

"Of course." 

"Oh. Cool."

"Weirdo." They smiled wide.

"Control freak."

 

**Carmilla**

 

She rubbed her hands up and down her thighs, trying to find some sort of way to calm down her racing heart and panicked mind. _I can't believe I wrote that._ Carmilla thought to herself. _I can't believe I actually wrote that. Oh god, I'm such an idiot._ Carmilla chewed on her bottom lip and ran a hand through her hair, her anxieties coming to play. Why did she write that? She should just take it back, she should just run in and- 

Laura stood at the doorway with the paper in her hand, leaning against the door frame. Carmilla's leg started bobbing up and down again, her honey brown eyes shadowed by some foreign emotion. _What is she thinking right now? God, why did I write that?_

On that small slip of paper in Laura's hand held Carmilla's reply, which said;

_I have a lot of feelings for you, and I don't know how to deal with them._

It was a stupid reply, honestly, but it was the truth. And now, Carmilla regrets that decision, because she has no idea what's running through Laura's mind, or if she even feels the same. Carmilla's heart pounded in her chest like a fist to a door, her body frozen but alive at the same time. The moments dragged by incredibly slow, as though they were taunting Carmilla, teasing her with the words she wrote.

"Um..." Laura finally started, breaking the moments of silence. "I do too, you know." Carmilla stared blankly at her, waiting for her to continue, as she was rendered speechless. "Have feelings for you."

Carmilla's heart stopped in her chest.

 

**Danny**

 

 _Well, this is not what I expected._ Danny thought to herself as she stood on the trail, spotting a large blanket and a Kirsch sprawled across it. About 20 minutes ago, Kirsch had texted her to meet him here. She wasn't sure what she was expecting to be exact, but it certainly wasn't this. Kirsch lifted his large head and spotted Danny, a wide grin spreading across his cheeks.

"D-bear! You made it!" She couldn't stop her own smile forming on her face. 

"Yeah, I did." She said. "So what's all of this?" Danny asked, gesturing toward the blanket.

"Well, I figured as a celebration, we could play our stargazing game. I know that this apartment hunting is stressful and all, and I hate fighting about it. So I figured as a make-up sentiment to each other, we could do this. And, instead of focusing on our disagreements, celebrate the fact that we actually found some apartments." Danny chewed on the inside of her cheek. Earlier, when they were searching for apartments online, they got into a major disagreement on which apartments they should check out. It ended with Danny storming out of his room with a loud 'Fuck you!' Danny nodded.

"I'm okay with that." Somehow, his grin got wider. He scooted on the blanket and patted the spot next to him. She was quick to plop down next to him and rest her head on his chest, his arm around her shoulders. Danny looked to the stars, trying to find a shape.

"Hey, wait a minute." He said, pointing to a random area of the sky. "I think that one says 'I'm sorry I'm such an idiot sometimes, but I promise I'm trying'." _Where does it-_ Danny suddenly realized what he was doing. _Ohhh._ Danny pointed to a random area of the sky.

"Over there, it says 'you're not an idiot, you just don't have the best taste in apartments'." Kirsch laughed his loud laugh. "And oh, it also says 'I'm sorry I yelled at you for something as dumb as an apartment, I just want this to be perfect'." She added. Kirsch kissed her temple, making her heart flutter.

"I'll make sure it's perfect, babe. Whatever you want." A smile crept onto her face.

"I think that one says 'I love you'." 

"I think it says 'I love you too'." Kirsch pointed to a random area of the sky, his finger tracing along the stars. "That looks like a water bottle." Danny nuzzled in closer.

"It's totally a skateboard."

"You're blind if you think that."

"My eyes are perfectly functional!

"Not if you think that's a skateboard."

 

**Laura**

 

She watched as Carmilla's eyes went wide, her words hanging in the air. Laura's heart never beat so sporadically and out of rhythm, like a toddler playing a drum for the first time. Once Laura learned that Carmilla did have feelings for her, she wanted to deal with it face to face. But now, she regrets that decision, because writing it down and communicating through a cat was so much easier than this.

"Oh." Carmilla said quietly. "That's, um... That's cool." Laura's stomach twisted as butterflies invaded it, fluttering around mad. Should Laura say something? Or wait for Carmilla to say something else? _That's cool_? What does that even mean?

"Yeah." Laura said breathlessly, noticing then that she's forgotten to breath during this time. Carmilla slowly lifted from her bed, making small steps towards Laura. She stopped in front of her, taking her breath away again. Her dark eyes never looked so unfathomable. There was something dancing behind them, but Laura couldn't figure out what. All she could think of was how close she was just then, and the words shared between them.

Her heart banged violently in her chest, and she'd wish just then it'd calm down, for her whole body to calm down. What's going to happen next? It's out there, they both know they feel the same. She's so happy about that, but oh so incredibly nervous. She just wanted something to happen- anything. The anticipation was slowly killing her, the close proximity sending her elsewhere. There were so many moments like this, moments where they were close, where something could happen but it doesn't, moments where something could happen and they do.

"Hey- whoa." Said a familiar voice. Laura jumped ten feet away from Carmilla, and whirled around to see JP, wearing boxers and a grey Cosmos t-shirt. She smiled awkwardly. Wasn't he supposed to leave the apartment? 

"Uh, hey JP. Fancy seeing you here." She said, trying to plead with her eyes for him to go. He seemed to pick it up, and nodded.

"Right. I'll just be going back to my room then." With a quick glance between Laura and Carmilla, he scurried back into his room. The air felt tight, almost suffocating. Laura knew Carmilla was right behind her, right there to finally deal with whatever has been happening with them. Well, no. She knows- Carmilla feels the same. _Oh my god Carmilla feels the same._

Slowly, ever so slowly, Laura turned around, meeting Carmilla's gaze again. What now? What do they do with this knowledge? Is Laura even ready to take this further? Can she dive deeper into this? Laura suddenly felt a panic, an ache in her chest from her last relationship. Could she do it again? She could get hurt- just like last time. She could be hurt far worse than that- so much worse. She can't do this- she can't do this now.

"Um." She took a step back and pointed her thumb to the front door. "I think I should go." Laura muttered, and turned around. She rushed out of the apartment before more could be said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos!


	20. One Way Or Another... Or Maybe Not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I'm just going to be honest. I hate the way I wrote this chapter and I re-wrote it like 15 times + a shit ton of editing but I've never found a satisfying version; at least for me anyway. So this was supposed to be in part to the original ending I had written, but as I stated before, I decided against it and extended it.
> 
> To put in perspective, each of my chapters are about 40k-50k characters long. Times that by 15. That's how much I wrote, and edited, and re-wrote. So I'm sorry if this is messy and just not good I really, like my brain is dead.
> 
> I stayed up nearly 36 hours re-writing this chapter over and over again. So after re-writing it for the 15th time, and being completely brain dead from the lack of sleep, I decided to just go with the version that I would prefer more, and this was the one. I actually really hate all 15 versions, but this was the one I hated the least. I'm sorry that this chapter kinda sucks, but I already have the next ones prepared and I promise those will be better than this one.
> 
> ALSO. I know this is a long note, but stick with me here. Things may seem to be angsty but I promise you it's not bad. I tried to make the angsty parts not-so action packed or w/e.
> 
> Anyway, sorry if this chapter isn't up to satisfactory, but I'm giving it my all in the next chapters to make up for it. So without further ado, the chapter from hell

**Carmilla**

 

Days passed by again, and Laura and Carmilla went back to not talking. Carmilla was hurt, secretly. She doesn't know why Laura had rushed out of her apartment like that, when she sat there that first night they saw each other again, promising she'd never leave. But at the same time she was relieved she did. This whole entire not-confronting-the-issue gig was much more comfortable for Carmilla, but at the same time more painful. She knows Laura feels the same, and all she wants to do is make her hers. It was at such parallels, really.

She wants to confront the issue, but she doesn't. Knowing Laura feels the same was miserable because she couldn't bring herself to do anything about it, but it was joyous because her feelings are returned. She's relieved nothing happened between them, but it's agonizing because she wants something to. 

Carmilla sighed, and stacked a book back onto the shelf. Maybe she should call her, check in on how she's doing. They don't have to talk about it. Really, she just wants to see the tiny ray of sunshine. She hates the days they go without talking, without seeing each other. And she knows it's partially her fault; she was the one that ignored Laura's attempts that first time. It's not her place to be upset that they haven't been talking, that Laura left her apartment when she did the exact same thing. 

The door opened, marking another customer. Carmilla smiled at the young man who walked in. He visits nearly everyday, but never buys anything. He always just looks around, fiddles with books, examines what's around and leaves. He doesn't talk to anyone, which Carmilla can appreciate. She doesn't find it odd, because she's had customers like this before, but they eventually buy something. Whatever, it's not really her business what he does and doesn't do with his time. 

"Good day." Theo greeted the young man with a smile. He simply eyed him up and down, and walked to a different section of the store.. "Uh, okay." He said to himself. Theo looked to Carmilla with a quirked eyebrow. "What's his deal?" Carmilla shrugged, and started organizing the books in alphabetical order.

"Don't know, don't care." Carmilla replied curtly. He nodded, and joined her in organizing the books.

"He comes in like everyday. Think he has a crush on you?" He teased. Carmilla rolled her eyes. Something like that has happened before. It ended up with Theo kicking the guy out of the store and threatening to call the police. 

"Wouldn't be surprised." Carmilla replied, setting the book _Defending Jakob_ in it's proper place. Theo laughed his boisterous laugh.

"So how's your little 'almost-sex' friend?" He teased. Carmilla sighed heavily. 

"Not talking." She grumbled. Carmilla sighed again. The front door swung open, and in came a young woman. Carmilla smiled to the passing girl. She's seen her here a few times before. She's shy, and kind. There's always some compliment she has to give about the store or what Carmilla was wearing that day. Carmilla's eyes followed her until she disappeared into the jungle of shelves. She groaned and tapped her forehead against the shelf. 

Why couldn't she fall for someone like that?

 

**Danny**

 

Apartment hunting with Kirsch has been going surprisingly well. They haven't found one that fitted to their needs yet- though that isn't very surprising. They've only been at this for a couple days, so it's not shocking that they haven't founded an apartment yet. Currently, they were taking a break at a diner Laura had recommended- Tuesday's. The food was great, the waiters and waitresses were super polite, and it was adorable inside- Laura recommended well.

"What about the one on Bauman street? That one was my favorite so far." Kirsch said, taking a large bite out of his burger. Danny shrugged. That one wasn't too bad. It was big enough for the two of them, and just in their price range. 

"I'd agree. But I didn't really like the neighbor. He gave me the chills." Danny said, sipping her water. Kirsch laughed and nodded.

"Agreed. Who has a name like Vordenburg?"

"Right?" Danny took a final bite to her fries, and dusted off her hands. "You almost done with that? Karnstein gets out of work in an hour." Today was also the day Danny and Kirsch were going to surprise Carmilla at work, and Kirsch was taking a really long time to eat. He nodded, and wolfed down his burger in a single bite. One thing that Danny liked about this place as well was they had you pay when they delivered your food, so they could just eat and go. 

"Ready." He said past a mouthful of food. He picked up their trays and brought them over to their proper place. He slid his hand into hers and they started to walk down the street. 

 

**Laura**

 

If this was a break up or simply a break, whatever the hell it was Laura was not handling it well. Carmilla and Laura went back to no talking. It's been days, and the more they pass by the harder they seem to get. Weren't things supposed to go the opposite? Isn't time supposed to heal all? Laura tried to keep her groan quiet, but failed as she caught the attention of Betty. She sighed, and closed the lap top perched on her lap.

"Alright, tiny gay. What is it this time?" She asked, the question frequented so much it was practically rehearsed. Laura pulled up her hoodie over her head, hiding from the world.

"Nothing." She grumbled, trying to center her attention back on the preaching teacher below.

"Come on. You and I _both_ know something is wrong. Spill the beans, Hollis." Betty replied, waiting patiently for Laura to give in- it didn't take long. Laura sighed, and turned her head to look into her baby blue eyes.

"It's Carmilla." Betty was next to sigh.

"Of course it is. Why did I expect anything different?" Laura rolled her eyes, letting the remark slide. But to be fair, it fits; she's lamented to Betty about Carmilla far too many times for her to expect differently. "What is it this time?" Laura sighed again, like a game passing back and forth between them.

"She... Well, she... I- we both kinda..." How does Laura word this? Because really, this was her fault- she shouldn't be the one brooding over this. She's the one that ran out, but... "Alright, I'll just give it to you straight."

"Go for it, gay." Betty dared with a grin. It took Laura a moment to figure out the joke, but she only allowed herself a few moments of laughter- she had to get this off her chest.

"Ha. Nice one. Anyway. I was at her apartment, long story short, I said I have feelings for her and she had feelings for me." Betty's jaw dropped, her baby blue eyes bulging out of her head. "But," I said, cutting her celebration short, "I kinda, um... Ran out." If Laura didn't think her eyes were wide a moment ago she definitely does now.

"Dude!" She exclaimed, earning a wave of hushes from students. Betty completely ignored them. "Why the hell did you run out?" She said in a quieter voice.

"I don't know!" Laura defended. "I just... The thought that something could actually happen scared the living hell out of me." Betty quirked an eyebrow.

"And now?..."

"Now I regret it, because what if she lost feelings for me?" Betty pursed her lips to the side.

"How long has it been?"

"5 days." Betty rolled her eyes.

"5 days? You don't just lose feelings for someone after 5 days. You're being ridiculous." She said callously.

"I'm being cautious." Laura defended.

"Which is another way of saying ridiculous." Laura groaned and flopped her head back down into her folded arms. 

"This isn't fair."

"Nothing ever is." Betty sighed. "Why don't you... I don't know- this is just a really crazy idea but stick why me here- talk to her?" Laura groaned once more. Talking- not as simple as it seemed to Laura.

"Why doesn't she talk to me?" Laura retaliated.

"You're the one that ran out." The words rang the truth, and god did Laura hate that. She sighed. She just wanted it fixed- now. Laura picked her head out of her folded arms. No. No she's going to fix this right now. Laura nearly jumped out of her seat and swung her hefty backpack over her shoulder, almost falling back down in her seat from the weight. 

"I'm fixing this. I am fixing this right now." Laura declared proudly, mind set on making things right.

"Really?" Betty said.

"What?"

"All I had to say was that you ran out and that's the push that makes you go? And in the middle of a seminar?" Laura shrugged. It's truly odd what actually motivates her. And when an idea sparks in her head, she needs to do it; to complete her task as fast as she can. "Well, go get your girl, Hollis." Laura smiled, and gave a tight nod to Betty before rushing out of the class room.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch excitedly yanked the door open for Danny, who walked in gracefully, her poles for legs strutting in like she was the owner of the small library. Kirsch followed her footsteps, letting the door close behind him. He looked around, not spotting Carmilla anywhere- or anyone. Where's that British kid? Or South African? What was his accent?

"Oh, god." Said the familiar raspy voice. "I didn't think the invasion of giants would come so soon." Kirsch and Danny whirled around in unison to see Carmilla, a stack of books next to her on a cart. Kirsch grinned.

"Good luck with that, Elvira." Danny replied, crossing her arms. 

"Elvira?" Carmilla retaliated.

"Mistress of the Snark." Kirsch did his best to stifle his laugher; the banter between these two was always comical. 

"As much as I love being invaded by giants, why did you come?" Carmilla asked, starting to stack the books into the shelves. Danny and Kirsch exchanged a glance. We want to know more about you. Kirsch waited for Danny's lead, not knowing what to say without somehow screwing up.

"I dunno. Make a surprise visit." Danny said. Carmilla sighed.

"Lovely. Mind postponing that another hour or two? I have work." The words were cut off by a loud clatter from the back of the library. Carmilla sighed. "Excuse me a moment." 

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla laggardly moved to where the fallen books had sounded. This was a negative to her job; sometimes the books literally come flying off the shelves. Her blood boiled immediately seeing the sight.

The shy girl that had entered minutes previous was cowering against the shelf, the young man that had entered before her hovering above her, an angry scowl painted on his expression, so dominant in comparison to the young woman's. He smacked the shelf, causing her to jump as he growled some threat. Carmilla was quick to step in.

"Oh no no no." Carmilla said, putting herself between the man and woman. "This is not happening. Theo!" Theo was quick to arrive, always waiting for her call. 

"Do we have a problem here?" Theo said, his tone threatening and putting on his, what Carmilla likes to call, 'bouncer stance'. 

"Nein." The woman quickly squeaked. Another spark to the flame smoking inside Carmilla. She grabbed the girl's hand, and started to drag her away.

"Take care of him." Carmilla said without a second thought.

"I don't think so." The man replied darkly. Next thing Carmilla knew he was wielding a knife. Everyone started walking backwards.

"Whoa man!" Theo exclaimed, throwing his hands up. Carmilla quickly put the woman behind her. 

"Hey just put it down." Carmilla said as calmly as she could, a look of pure murder in his eye.

"Give her back to me!" He exclaimed. Carmilla cocked her head to the side, an anger building inside of her.

"Are you really that weak of a man that you'd have to wield a knife?" Carmilla challenged. She needed to keep the focus on her. If she could distract him long enough, point his anger towards her maybe Theo and this woman could get away safely. She knows- all she has to do is scream and she's got the friendly giants on her side. But she knows that means putting them in danger. She needs to get everyone away from this man safely- then she can be reckless.

"The hell did you say?" He growled, waving his knife. Bad idea- really fucking bad idea as he managed to scrape Carmilla's arm. She hissed in pain, but the adrenaline coursing through her body lessened the ache, blood trickling down her arm.

"You heard me." She snapped back. She did her best to ignore the look Theo was giving her, pleading for her to stop. "Let them go- he's just a kid, and she's just someone you'll never have; not with me here." Carmilla challenged, gently pushing the woman further behind her. Theo felt too far away, too close to the attacker. She has to draw him closer.

"Fuck you!" He exclaimed, making another attack. Carmilla shoved the woman away and took the attack, a hit to her shoulder, though he didn't stab her; simply sliced her shoulder as she dodged the attack just in time. Theo tried to step in, but the man shoved him to the ground.

"Don't hurt him!" Carmilla cried out. "Look- focus on me instead. What, too scared to fight a woman? Come on; what are you waiting for?" To her surprise he blew a punch to her head, which she reciprocated with by pushing him away. Her elbowed her in the lip, reminding her of the way her mother used to. She shook off the remnants of her past, fighting for her life. She eventually shoved the man away. "Come on; is that all you got?" She dared, holding her fists up. Yes- she was scared. Yes- she wanted to run. But she was giving the chance for these two to run, if she could just keep this up for a moment longer... He only got a step in at a lunge before a loud shriek sounded.

"NO!"

 

**Laura**

 

Laura finally arrived to the bookstore after a hasty 10 minute walk. Luckily from the cold weather, she wasn't too hot; the only burning being her legs from that power walk. Laura was surprised when she found Danny and Kirsch standing there, smiling at each other with their arms crossed. The amount of times their body language is replicated on each other is incredible.

"Um, hey guys." Laura greeted, gripping onto the strap of her backpack. Kirsch smiled when he spotted Laura.

"Oh. Hey little nerd!" He replied.

"Hey Kirsch. Danny." She said rather awkwardly. No- she can still pull off this plan of professing her feelings. Kiss her and say let's be together- that was her plan. Well, that's the only plan she developed as is. "Um, where's Carmilla?" She couldn't wait a moment longer; she had to do this- she had to do it now. Kirsch and Danny here or not, she's doing this.

"Oh. She's in the back." Danny replied, gesturing down the rows of shelves. Laura nodded.

"Cool. I'll, um. Don't go back there for like three minutes tops." Laura said. Three minutes- that's enough time to confess her feelings and kiss her. Plenty of time, right?

"Don't hurt him!" Laura heard Carmilla exclaimed, instantly setting off alarm bells inside Laura's mind. What the? Laura took careful steps forward, eavesdropping on the scene. She spotted Theo on the floor, only seeing his head. "Look- focus on me instead. What, too scared to fight a woman?" Laura heard Carmilla say next. _No._ A voice instantly sounded in Laura's mind. _No- oh no no no. She's- she's doing something reckless again._ Laura heard the clattering of the books on the shelves. She started quickening her steps.

"What, is that all you got?" _Carmilla- that's Carmilla again_. Laura's eyes went wide as she stood, some strange figure's back to Laura, Theo on the ground next to him, blood staining Carmilla's shirt and arm, a woman terrified behind her in the corner. Laura could see it- she's sacrificing herself again. This reckless behavior. She's trying to be bold but she's scared; oh so scared. Laura started to grow angry. _I told her not to be reckless!_ As soon as Laura spotted a knife in the man's hand, her body took over. He took a step forward, a step too close to Carmilla.

"NO!" Laura shouted. In one swift movement, she swung her bag off her shoulder and whacked it across the man's head with such a force, all the books in her bag making a loud thud as they hit him, his whole body smashing into the bookshelves and collapsing to the floor. "What the fuck! Who is this!" Laura shouted, flailing her hands in the air.

"What- I don't know who this is! Some customer!" Carmilla exclaimed. She kicked his knife away.

"What the hell Carmilla! You don't just... Why would you... And who is that girl?" Laura exclaimed, a rage building inside her along with the adrenaline from the danger. She swung her backpack down, hitting the man again for good measure.

"Another customer!" Carmilla shouted back. "Plus why does it matter to you?"

"Why does it matter?" The man tried to get up again, but Laura stopped him by kicking him in the gut, him instantly collapsing back to the ground. "Because we still have things to talk about! Like that little-"

"What's going on here?" Danny exclaimed, Kirsch following her suite. Their eyes went wide at the scene, though Laura hardly noticed. "Oh my god!" Danny exclaimed. Kirsch immediately hopped onto the guy, pinning his wrists down.

"Holy hell- someone call 112!" Kirsch nearly shouted. That girl- she's the only one sensible right now. Laura put on her best smile.

"Ein zwölf." Laura said politely. The girl nodded, confused and terrified, but with shaky hands, she pulled out her phone. "Anyway, back to this. Why haven't you talked to me?" Laura shouted to Carmilla.

"Why haven't you talked to me?" Carmilla replied, wincing as she moved her arm. Laura's attention immediately drifted to the amount of blood trickling down her arm, dripping onto the carpet. 

"Holy hufflepuff! Carmilla, your arm!" Laura exclaimed. She quickly rushed to Carmilla's side, spotting two slashes on her left arm. 

"Yeah no shit my arm! And Hufflepuff, really?" 

"Uh, guys! A little help!" Kirsch said, the man writhing beneath him. Danny was quick to help, both of them pining the man down while the girl next to them spoke frantically in German.

"Yeah Hufflepuff. Why, is that a problem?"

"Well that's certainly a little odd for someone who ships Ron and Snape!" Laura's jaw dropped.

"I told you that in confidence!" 

"Uh- miss, would you mind-" The south african boy tried to say. Laura angrily waved a finger at him.

"Butt out!" Carmilla and Laura said in unison, directing their anger back towards each other. 

"I don't keep the secrets of those who abandon me!" Carmilla shouted. Laura noticed then, tears threatening in her eyes, her fists clenched, bruises running down her head, the slashes on her arm. Her mother- is she really comparing me to her?

"Guys-" Danny tried to say.

"I didn't abandon you!" Laura shouted back.

"Um, guys-" Kirsch tried to say.

"Oh yeah? Then what do you call walking out on me then? Not calling me when you left? Ignoring me for days!" 

"Kirsch I don't need you to try and help me here." Danny snapped to Kirsch.

"That wasn't about you!" Laura shouted.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Kirsch snapped back to Danny.

"Oh yeah? Then what is that about?" Carmilla growled.

"It means I can handle myself." Danny said.

"It's about me!" Laura shouted.

"I think I'm having a heart attack." Theo said.

"Of course it is! It's always about you!" Carmilla shouted. "Theo you're not having a fucking heart attack!" Carmilla snapped to him.

"How would you know? Are you a doctor?" Danny shot back to Carmilla.

"My dad's a doctor." Laura said.

"See? Back to you again! Always about you!" Carmilla snarled.

"Hey! Don't talk to Laura that way!" Kirsch snapped.

"Ich glaube, ich die falsche Nummer gewählt. Ein französisch Mann hat mich nur gefragt, ob ich ein Baguette." The young woman said. The room fell into a group bickering session, yelling about everyone about something that someone else did or said.

"GUYS!" The attacker shouted, silencing the whole room. "Jesus fucking christ! This is the worst! That German girl over there literally doesn't know how to call the police, this fucking couple on my back has some serious dominance issues, that boy on the floor is having sensory overload, and Ellen and Portia over there are bickering even though they clearly have feelings for each other! This is a freak show!" The attacker exclaimed. Laura crossed her arms.

"I'm Portia." Laura muttered.

"No. I'm Portia." Carmilla refused. They started to bicker again, until he screeched.

"Oh my god! Enough!" The attacker exclaimed. "Y'all are fucked up; seriously fucked up. You guys have some major fucking issues you need to work out. You know what? I don't even want the girl anymore. What girl doesn't know how to dial the police?" Because Danny and Kirsch were so stunned, he easily writhed out of their grip. He straightened out his shirt and picked up his knife, sliding it back into a hidden sheath.

"Work out ya fucking issues." He said, pretending to drop a mic before storming out of the library. Everyone shared dazed looks and bewildered expressions. 

What the hell just happened?

 

**Carmilla**

 

A lot of interviews by police officers and several examinations later, and Carmilla was cleared to go home. She somehow came out unscathed, just the two slashes on her arm and bruises on her head. Carmilla didn't want to go to her home, she wanted to go to her real home; Laura. She was informed by Lafontaine that Laura was at her apartment. After making sure Carmilla was okay, they told her that Laura was shaken up. She had locked herself inside of her room and hasn't come out. Carmilla didn't think that could be it, after all the scene was so bizarre that it'd be wild to think that someone could be so traumatized that they'd lock themselves in their room. It must be about what the attacker said or what Carmilla said; either way she wants to be home.

Carmilla now stood in Laura's apartment, Lafontaine and Perry hugging her. She had received plenty of hugs today. Kirsch, Danny, and Theo now have her labeled as some 'hero', which she didn't believe she was. But because of it, there was a lot of hugging. She was just glad she swallowed some Advil, because these little sentimental touches would hurt a lot more otherwise. 

"Okay, alright, as great as this is, this kinda hurts." Carmilla said, every bruise and cut on her body becoming apparent. Lafontaine and Perry let go immediately.

"Here- I'll bake you some snacks." Perry said.

"Oh that won't be-" She scurried off to the kitchen before Carmilla could finish. She sighed heavily.

"It's best to try and not stop her. This is how she handles things." Lafontaine said, their eyes soft. Carmilla nodded. "I hate to be a bother, but are you sure you're alright? Kirsch and Danny said you were the only one taking the beatings." Carmilla nodded again and put on a fake smile. Truth was, she wasn't okay; far from it. Her body ached, reminding her of every beating she took as a child. She could see her mother's eyes in the crazed man's, the same empty blue. She could feel her fists where his fist and knife were, beating her senseless. She just wanted to be with Laura; to hold her in her arms, just like when they were little. When her mother would beat her, and she'd run to Laura's house or they'd go to their spot. She'd go to her home.

"Can I see Laura?" Carmilla asked, longing for her to comfort her in the way only she can. She just wants to be home; her real home. The home with honey-brown eyes and caramel-colored hair.

"Oh, yeah! Of course you should talk to Laura!" Perry said from the kitchen. "Um... Except maybe-"

"Except maybe what?" Carmilla hardly had the patience for this. Are they blind to see that she truly isn't traumatized but upset?

"Well, maybe not right now." She said, pulling out a tray. "Um, she's not hurt or anything just shaken up and... You're a little intense." Carmilla glanced between Lafontaine and Perry, both of them wearing awkward smiles.

"Intense?" Carmilla repeated.

"She means she's a little traumatized and you're on a mission girl." Lafontaine replied. Carmilla tilted her head to the side and crossed her arms.

"But I'll talk to her." Perry said, dusting off her hands. "And see if she feels up to meeting you, okay?" Either they know she's not traumatized, or they really don't. Either way, she's willing to stick this out.

"Yeah, okay." Carmilla retaliated. She clenched and unclenched her jaw. She wanted to see her- she wanted to see her now. 

"Um, and you know, maybe in the mean time you might want to... Clean up a bit?" Perry's voice was raised an octave. Clean up a bit? Carmilla looked to Lafontaine for answers.

"Yeah. Maybe change into something a little less... Bloody?" Carmilla looked down at herself, spotting the blood-stains on her moss green t-shirt. Flashbacks of her childhood came back, terror striking through her. 

"Can I just see Laura?" Carmilla lamented. She had to see her- she needed to see her. Lafontaine and Perry glanced to each other, seeming to communicate with their eyes. It was then that Laura exited from the room, clearly just waking up from slumber. Carmilla's heart squeezed- she always looked so adorable when she woke up.

"Um, you know what? Actually... We should get going to that... Thing." Lafontaine said. Perry nodded.

"Ah yes, that... Thing. Gotta go to that thing. Um, uh, bookclub! Love those meetings!" Perry and Lafontaine scurried off, though Carmilla hardly noted that they were ever there as soon as Laura exited her room. Laura and Carmilla locked eyes, and suddenly the pain wasn't so bad. Laura made slow footsteps to Carmilla, both cautious and eager. She stopped before her, her honey brown eyes looking so enlivened, so big and wide.

Laura ran up to her, clasping her tiny arms around Carmilla's waist in one of the most bone-crushing hugs she's ever received. Carmilla's arms clasping around Laura's neck, holding her head in her hand as she rested it in the crook of Carmilla's neck. She closed her eyes, the pain not washing away but lessening, her heart fitting into place as she held her in her arms. Carmilla closed her eyes, and for the briefest of moments, everything was okay. Her mother never beat her, never left her with those scars. Her body didn't ache from the beating she just took, Laura and Carmilla didn't have any issues; everything was just... Okay.

But then Laura pulled back, and her sanctuary was gone. Laura's hands dropped to her sides as she eyed Carmilla's up and down, taking in the appearance. Her eyebrows knitted in concern.

"Oh for fuck's sake, Carmilla." Laura said, before grabbing the collar of her shirt and yanking her lips to hers. The pain in her lip was dull compared to the greatness of the kiss. She found her sanctuary again; this one greater than the last. But it was quick, because Laura pushed her back. "You were such an idiot! I told you not to do that! To be so reckless!" Carmilla was rendered dumbfounded. What? Reckless?

"Reckless? How was I reckless? I almost got stabbed and _that's_ what you say?" Carmilla said in disbelief. Was this a joke?

"You almost got stabbed because you kept trying to throw your life away! I told you next time- god you were just so... Ugh!" Carmilla had never seen Laura this angry, a fire in her eyes that nothing could extinguish. Scared- Carmilla was actually scared. But her anger was starting to match Laura's.

"What do you mean by that? I was trying to help the others!" Carmilla replied.

"Carmilla, look at you! From the bloodied shirt to the bruises... You were reckless! I told you to stop doing that- I told you to not throw your life away like it was some broken toy!" She could see it then. Scared- Laura was scared too. Scared of what? There was desperation there, but for what?

"Why are you yelling at me? Do you not care that I almost died at all?" Carmilla said, her voice louder than last time.

"Of course I do! I'm yelling because I care!" She was taken aback by that. Yelling to her always meant anger, hatred. Yelling because someone cares? That doesn't make sense.

"That makes no sense!" She said, holding her hands out in disbelief.

"Nether does trying to throw your life away! But here you are, willing to die without a care! I told you to stop being reckless! To stop doing that! Why won't you just stop, Carmilla? That's all you have to do. Just stop and think, and not be so reckless!" Her voice cracked, and it had to be one of the most heartbreaking sounds Carmilla has ever heard. But yet, she was still angry. Angry and very much confused.

"I don't understand why you're yelling at me." Carmilla snapped. Laura ran both of her hands through her hair.

"Oh my god." She said exasperatedly. "You haven't listened to a word I've said. Not a single fucking word I've said." Carmilla gave her a shrug, waiting for her to continue. "Get out." 

"Wha-"

"Get out." Laura said harshly, her hair a mess from when her hands ran through them. Carmilla felt a pang in her chest. Even like this, she wanted to stay with Laura. She just wanted to find comfort, which she realized she did even when their screaming their heads off at each other. Laura pointed to the door. "Go." Carmilla instead found herself taking Laura's head in her hands and pulling her into a kiss, one that was returned with anticipation. The pain she was feeling couldn't even compare to the surge of nerves. Laura grabbed Carmilla's hips and backed her into a wall, kissing with great acrimony.

"Who the hell offers up their life like that?" Laura growled, fisting Carmilla's shirt in her hands and tugging her into another kiss.

"I wasn't offering up my life! I was trying to help!" Carmilla snarled. She grabbed Laura's wrists and flipped them, pinning Laura's arms back against the wall.

"By offering up your life!" Laura said. Carmilla's breathing was ragged, barely able to get out her words as Laura's lips kept swallowing them in enraged kisses that could only be described as violent.

"I think we have different definitions of that." Carmilla muttered. Laura wriggled her hands free and started to unbutton Carmilla's shirt, but stopped down the third button and pushed her away. 

"No. No we're not doing this unless we talk about it. Actually, no! I can't even do that! I am too angry right now, Carmilla." She said a name with a bite, making her cringe.

"You know what? You were reckless too! You fucking smacked that guy with your backpack. What if he saw you come in? Heard you? All it would have took was for him to turn around and extend his arm and bam!" Carmilla slapped her hands together. "You'd be dead! So it's okay when you do it but when I it's a sudden crime?" Laura's jaw clamped shut. Carmilla scoffed, and shook her head. "Unbelievable." Carmilla turned on her heel and walked out the door, only to find Perry and Lafontaine staring at her with guilty expressions. She was feeling too many emotions to care that they had listened in. Carmilla simply strutted past them.

_Like I care._

 

**Laura**

 

Her blood boiled, heart ached, pounding in her chest with a newfound heaviness. Lafontaine and Perry stood there with guilty expression, Perry fidgeting with her hands and Lafontaine looking anywhere else but Laura as though the interior design of the apartment was the most interesting event in the room. Just before Laura had fallen asleep earlier, she confessed everything that had happened between Carmilla and her. The two listened intently, and tried giving advice, but Laura wasn't having it. She's still not having it. Laura turned back around and headed straight to her bed.

She just wanted to sleep again.

 

*****************

 

**Carmilla**

 

Days had passed, and yet again Laura and Carmilla had stopped talking. Though, that isn't a surprise. It's like a pattern; they talk once, something happens, and they don't talk to each other for days.  Right now, Carmilla hated it more than anything. Every time she moved something would hurt, reminding her of her mother's abuse. Every time she saw her reflection she saw a bruise, reminding her of the child she once was. Every time she changed a bandage, she was reminded of the days she had to do so, the days where she had to hide, isolate herself, to cut off from the world.

Carmilla hasn't worked in days, which is no surprise. Theo was still shaken up a bit, alongside Danny and Kirsch. Carmilla was the only one who wasn't traumatized by the event, but rather the trauma she experienced as a child. Carmilla had called Mattie, told her of the bizarre man who tried to stab Carmilla then proceeded to chastise each member. Mattie promised she'd make a visit soon, but Carmilla refused. She didn't want to see anyone. There were only two people who could pull her out of this spell;

William and Laura.

But William was still overseas, and Laura wasn't talking to her. It wasn't fair, really. That they were the only people Carmilla ever found comfort in. It wasn't fair that one was hundred of miles away and the other refused to talk to her for reasons unknown. It wasn't fair. 

Yet again, nothing was fair to Carmilla. Nothing had ever been fair for her. She's been damned since day one. The day the she was born the world decided to bring all the bad luck and force it upon her to lessen the bad luck of others. That's all she's ever been; a punching bag. 

Carmilla glared at her reflection, bringing her fingertips to her busted lip. She could see her 17 year old self in the mirror staring back at her, terrified. Suffering the manipulative relationship, the abuse of her mother, the distance from William, the loneliness. It's no wonder Laura abandoned her; everyone always abandons her. She's never been good enough for anyone. She never will be.

Carmilla ran her fingertips over her black eye, remembering the time her mother had smashed her head into the corner of the marble counter tops to one of their homes for trying to defend herself. She could hear the sound in her head, engraved there for eternity. Carmilla can still see her mother's malicious blue eyes, her tight smile, the way she looked at Carmilla as though she was simply a roadblock down her path to success. 

She remembered how alone she felt, how scared she was when Carmilla left Laura. How much she isolated herself, and how much she longed for a simple call from Laura. Those days she spent where her only sanctuary was that stupid friendship necklace she always hung onto, the only hope she had being that maybe one day Laura would call, or maybe one day she'd see her.

Now she's back in her life, and Carmilla wonders why she ever wished such a thing. Carmilla disrobed her shirt and turned around, looking at the scars on her back her mother had left, as though she had marked her. Each one came with a memory, a pain, an evil sentiment, a harsh phrase her mother had told her.

The thoughts streaming through Carmilla's mind were interrupted when she heard a knock to her apartment door. Carmilla sighed heavily. _I can't even have one dramatic moment to myself?_

She doesn't care- she's going out in a bra. UPS can see how demented and ruined her body is- she doesn't care. The people who walked by can see her as this rotten capsule. Doesn't matter.

Carmilla ambled out of the bathroom and down the steps, yanking the door open, glaring at whoever dared to knock on her door. She was taken aback when she saw Lafontaine.

"Uh, hey." They greeted rather awkwardly. Carmilla rolled her eyes.

"What?" She snapped back. Carmilla didn't have the patience for pity. Lafontaine gulped.

"Um, I, is JP here?" Carmilla sighed. 

"JP! LAFONTAINE IS HERE!" She shouted. Carmilla motioned for Lafontaine to come in, but her mind stopped when she saw Laura behind them.

"COMING!" He shouted back. Whatever Laura had to say, Carmilla didn't want to hear it. If she chose to abandon her, then that's that. Whatever comes next doesn't matter. Carmilla turned around and walked back up the steps. When she reached the top she bumped into JP, who looked at her with guilty eyes. He wanted her to come with Lafontaine. She suddenly realized. Of course he would do something like this- he's always trying to fix her issues. 

Carmilla made a quick pivot around him, moving to the kitchen, still only wearing a bra for her top. They can see how much her body was ruined; she's past the point of caring. She barely listened to the discussion that went on between the three as she snatched a grape soda, chugging it down in one go. Carmilla watched with angry eyes as words were exchanged, until JP and Lafontaine scurried off to his room, leaving Laura alone at the top of the stairs.

Laura tried helplessly to open the door, rattling and yanking on the door knob. _That little shit..._ Carmilla wiped the remnants of the soda left on her mouth with the back of her hand, tossing the can into the trash. Laura slowly turned around, locking eyes momentarily with Carmilla. Carmilla looked down to the hardwood floor, feeling an ache in her chest. She abandoned her; it doesn't matter now.

She opened the fridge again, pretending to search for something, anything. The perks of being a librarian is you've learned that you can organize anything in any way, so she decided to organize the fridge by color. _Wasabi? Why the hell do we have wasabi?_ Carmilla wondered to herself as she casted it aside with the green objects. Once everything was color coded, she then organized each colored section into alphabetical order. That spared her another couple of minutes, but now she really had nothing else to organize. 

Carmilla made sure to make her sigh apparent so the tiny gay knows that she's not having a good time. When she turned around she saw Laura's eyes on her, but she snapped them to the ceiling as if she wasn't looking. Carmilla rolled her eyes. _Why is she still standing there?_ She rolled her eyes at herself. Why did she have to be such a good host?

"You can sit on the couch." Carmilla said to her, gesturing to said couch. Laura smiled to her awkwardly, the tension between them nearly palpable. In fact, it could be; all Carmilla has to do is punch her in the face... Or maybe kiss her a little bit... Carmilla quickly shook the thoughts away.

"Thanks." She muttered before making the journey. She plopped down, Mircalla soon to jump on her lap. Carmilla sneered.  _Stupid cat- love me instead._ Carmilla mentally cursed the cat, and started to walk the way to her room. As her hand reached the handle Laura spoke. "Wait." She said, and for some reason Carmilla stopped dead in her tracks. _How does she still have a hold on me like that?_ Carmilla clenched her jaw in wait for her response. "I, um... How are your bruises?" _I stopped for that?_

"Fine." Carmilla replied curtly.

"That's good." Laura murmured. Carmilla rolled her eyes. _I don't have time for this._ She swung the door open, but Laura spoke again. "Wait." Carmilla sighed, and slowly shut her door.

"What is it now, creampuff?"

"Can we talk?" She ran her hand through her hair, careful not to touch any marks. _God, I'm a fool._

"Whatever." Carmilla took a seat on the lounge chair, crossing her arms.

"I, uh... I'm glad you're okay." Though the words meant something, Carmilla tried to convince herself they meant nothing to her. 

"Cool." She replied nonchalantly. Laura pursed her lips side to side, running her hand over Mircalla's fur. She instantly wanted to recover from her harsh greeting, but she decided against it; Laura was the one that chose to abandon her. 

"Can I-"

"No." 

"But you don't even-"

"No." Carmilla really just wanted to screw with her. Whatever she wanted, Carmilla wasn't going to give it to her. Laura's eyebrows twitched into a scowl, her eyes trained on the cat in her arms. She smirked slightly, taking victory in how annoyed she was getting.

"What if-"

"Nope." 

"Stop-"

"Nah."

"Would you just-"

"No." 

"Can you shut up for three seconds?" Laura snapped. Carmilla's eyebrows shot way to her hairline, a fire burning in Laura's eyes. She wasn't going to let her have it easy. "Thank you. Now-"

"Three seconds is up."

"Oh my god!" Carmilla smirked, taking great satisfaction in her short temper. Laura huffed, and it was like Mircalla could sense the anger radiating off of her, because she quickly scattered off her lap and to her scratching post. "Can't you act like an adult for 5 seconds?"

"Ah, but where's the fun in that?" Carmilla said carelessly. Laura glared at her, the fire in her eyes fueling her to ebb it on. But who was she to say who should and shouldn't act like an adult? She's the one that's been having tantrums like a child. "And I'm the one that's supposed to act like an adult when you're having these temper tantrums?" Carmilla said, her own fire starting to burn.

"Temper tantrums? Really? My anger is valid." Carmilla cocked an eyebrow.

"Valid? You're calling it valid? Yelling at me when I got some creepy guy off your back, that's valid? Screaming at me when I took a blow to protect others, nearly getting stabbed in the process, that's valid? Your anger is valid? In what way?" Laura paused for a moment, and Carmilla wasn't sure if it was because she realized Carmilla was right or if she couldn't believe what she said.

"You haven't listened to anything I've said, have you?" Carmilla stared blankly back at Laura, waiting for her to explain what she meant. Laura scoffed, and shook her head. "I'm not angry because you saved me. I'm not angry because you almost got stabbed. I'm angry because you're being so reckless with your life. Do you know how scared I am to lose you? How scared I stood, listening to you begging for him to kill you."

"I wasn't-"

"No!" Laura said, slamming her hand down on the couch. "It is _my_ turn to talk." Carmilla's eyebrows shot way to her hairline, eyes widening. "You are not listening to me! I am angry because you were being reckless. Reckless. Do you understand? R-e-c-k-l-e-s-s. Reckless. You are throwing away your life like it has no meaning. You don't even realize how important you are!" Laura pushed to her feet. 

"Why are you angry? Do you even realize what I did? I saved Kirsch, Danny, and Theo and that german lady!" Carmilla replied.

"That's not why I'm angry! Are you- do you really not understand? Carmilla, because you keep throwing away your life! That's why I'm angry! Because you're treating yourself like a rotten piece that doesn't even matter! I'm worried, Carmilla! I was so worried about you and you fail to even accept that!" Carmilla was next to hop to her feet, not believing what gibberish left Laura's lips.

"You don't care! If you cared then you'd stay!" Carmilla replied, her fists by her side.

"I do care! That's why I'm so angry!" 

"Then why'd you leave me?"

"I didn't leave you!"

"You were the one that stormed out of here!"

"Has it ever occurred to you that I have issues of my own? That everything isn't always your fault? That maybe somethings are because of me and my own personal issues?" Carmilla was taken aback for a moment. Had she considered that? In her head, she'd always blame herself, that she always did something wrong, and that's why things happened. "God, you're unbelievable. Stop putting the blame on yourself, and actually give a damn about what could happen to you!" Carmilla's jaw clenched shut. That was a slap to the face. She's never cared about what happens to her, and for Laura to plead for that...

"Well has it ever occurred to _you_ that maybe I can't?" 

"You can! You just need to open your fucking eyes!"

"I CAN'T!" Carmilla shouted. JP's door flung open.

"Guys!" Lafontaine shouted, rushing between them. "Stop it!" Laura and Carmilla glared at each other, her honey-brown eyes burning into hers in some sort of staring contest. She was angry, but there was something else there, something else behind her eyes. What was that? Desperation maybe? "You guys are being ridiculous!" Lafontaine exclaimed, looking between the two, snapping her attention back to Lafontaine. "You guys need to talk this out." They looked between them again. "Calmly." They added as an after thought. "JP and I are running down to the store. When I get back this better be resolved." Carmilla rolled her eyes. 

Carmilla and Laura continued to glare at each other as Lafontaine and JP scurried down the stairs, eyeing them once more to make sure they weren't on the verge of killing each other.

No promises there.

 

**JP**

 

As Lafontaine exited the apartment, he quickly attached their invention to the door, preventing anyone on the inside from leaving. AKA, they spent three days in the lab inventing a contraption that keeps a door locked without needing a lock, or, for the folks at home; they're locking Carmilla and Laura inside the apartment until their not fighting anymore. They shared a quick glance as he locked it.

"She's totally going to murder us." JP said. 

"Yeah, but at least their issue will be resolved one way or another." They shared a quick nod, and started walking down the streets of Styria. 

God, they are _so_ dead if Carmilla finds out.

 

**Laura**

 

Carmilla rolled her eyes, her chest heaving from anger. Laura was pissed at both Carmilla, and herself. Pissed at Carmilla for everything that happened, but pissed at herself for getting turned on by seeing Carmilla like this. _I came here to work this out- not work her out._ Laura mentally cursed herself, and Carmilla for looking so attractive angry and shirtless. 

"You can go now; the goons won't know you left. We can just tell them we made up or whatever." Carmilla said, crossing her arms. Laura squinted at Carmilla. Right now, that didn't seem like a terrible idea.

"Fine." She growled.

"Fine!" Carmilla exclaimed. Laura shot her one more angry glare and stormed down the stairs. She's never been so eager to leave a room before, and as she turned the door knob, she realized it refused to comply.

"What the?" She muttered to herself. Laura tried relentlessly to push the door open, shoving her weight against it. The door refused the budge. _Oh you got to be kidding me._ "Uh, Carmilla. The door is stuck." Laura said, the knob refusing to turn. Did the world hate her this much?

"Pfft. Sure it is." Laura rolled her eyes.

"No, really." Laura replied, the door still working against her. Carmilla scoffed, but trudged down the stairs.

"Scoot." Carmilla's hand replaced Laura's on the door, and Laura could only try and keep her eyes trained on the knob instead of the way Carmilla's arm flexed as she struggled against it. "What the frilly hell?" Carmilla rattled the doorknob again, trying to force it open. "Oh you can't be serious." She muttered under her breath. Carmilla sighed, and dropped her arm down.

"Looks like we're stuck here, creampuff." They locked eyes, both their gazes trying to dominate the other.

"Guess so." They glared at each other, eyes going about in some sort of war.

_Great._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos!
> 
> (Again, I'm super super sorry that this chapter wasn't great)


	21. Workin' It Out (Kinda)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Locked in a room together... Frustrated... Sexual tensions high... I wonder what could ever happen....

**Carmilla**

 

 _Well, this is fucking dandy._ Carmilla thought to herself. She still worked relentlessly at the jammed door while Laura sat on her couch. It was like someone was on the other side holding the doorknob, and she'd believe it to be JP and Lafontaine if she hadn't face timed them not too long ago. They said they'd be back soon, so she had no reason to worry. But it's been 20 minutes and the door is still stuck in some damned stubborn refusal to open, JP and Laf are still out shopping, and Laura is still stuck here with her.

Carmilla groaned, and banged her forehead against the door. Does the world hate her? Hate everything there is to her being? Of course it does; it always has. Silly question.

"Why don't you just give up on that?" Laura called from the living room. _Because you're here._ Carmilla bit back the words, and sighed. She trudged up the stairs in defeat, emphasizing each step so the cupcake still knows she's not having a good time. Carmilla groaned and plopped down on the lounge chair, her body aching. She could feel every bruise he left on her head, the slashes on her arm. She closed her eyes, trying to fend off the memories of her mother. 

"God, getting sliced with a knife hurts like a bitch." Carmilla muttered under her breath. She felt the familiar ball of fur hop onto her stomach, making her wince in response. She carefully lifted the cat and placed it back on the ground. She heard the gentle _tap tap_ of her paws as she trotted elsewhere. Carmilla sighed. _Not even a cat can fix this._ She adjusted more comfortably on the couch, making it in a way where there was no pressure on her wounded arm.

This has to be a joke, right? She can't _actually_ be stuck with Laura in her apartment, right? She's being punk'd right now- that's what this was. She was sure of it. Just a giant prank. A big, giant prank. Someone's going to jump out and yell 'You've been punk'd!' because this is too surreal. Where are you, Ashton Kutcher?

Suddenly, she felt gentle fingertips brushing against her cheek. Her eyes shot open to see Laura standing there, her brows furrowed into a determined scowl. Carmilla cocked her eyebrow, though the touch was soothing. Her feather-light fingertips moved to her temple where one of her bumps was, the touch so soft it felt like she could very well heal her wounds. Aren't they supposed to be mad at each other? This isn't what people who are mad at each other do, right? Laura rested her hand on Carmilla's cheek, her thumb gently brushing over the bruise that had formed there.

"Idiot." Laura muttered. _And there it is._ Laura stormed back to the couch, leaving Carmilla in a bewildered state. What was that? Her eyes followed Laura, watching as she crossed her legs, clasping her hands on her knee. They played some sort of stare-off for a moment. Laura raised her eyebrows, waiting for Carmilla to speak, but she wasn't going to be the one to cave in first. They glared at each other, silently challenging the other to be the one to break the silence. But when Carmilla quirked an eyebrow and shook her head, Laura seemed to break.

"Are you ever going to get put a shirt on?" Laura suddenly exclaimed, voice ridden with disdain. 

"Does it bother you?" Carmilla asked, smirking slightly.

"Yes."

"Then no."

Laura glared at her momentarily, then rolled her eyes. Carmilla tucked her hands behind her head victoriously, crossing her ankles. Laura drummed her fingers against the couch, producing an obnoxious sound.

"Can you stop doing that?" Carmilla found herself saying.

"What?"

"Patting your fingers against the couch." Carmilla snapped.

"Does it bother you?"

"Yes."

She already knew where this was going.

"Then no."

Carmilla squinted at Laura, who continued to drum her fingers obnoxiously against the cushion. Silence soon followed, both girls clearly irritated by the other's presence. Carmilla pried her eyes away, staring to the ceiling above, but her vision was darkened by a soft cloth. Carmilla immediately moved it from her face. _A shirt?_ Carmilla looked over to Laura and noted she now sat shirtless. Her eyes grew three times their size. She looked back to the article of clothing in her hand. _Laura's shirt._ Carmilla immediately tossed it elsewhere and forced herself to gaze to the ceiling.

"Strip tease? Really?" Carmilla scoffed back, trying to hide how affected she was.

"If you're going to be shirtless then so am I." Laura replied. Carmilla rolled her eyes. 

"Put your shirt back on."

"I'm staying this way until you put a shirt on."

Carmilla huffed.

"It's my apartment; I can do what I damn please." 

"I'm the house guest; isn't this a little rude?"

Carmilla snapped her gaze to Laura and gave her best glare, trying to keep her eyes trained on the honey-brown ones, and not her smooth skin, or the perfect curvature to her hips, the pointed shape to her shoulders... Carmilla shook her head. Nope.

"If you don't like it then you can leave." Carmilla teased, knowing full well there stuck together. 

"So can you; you could go into your room." Laura shot back. Carmilla chewed on the inside of her cheek. She had a point there- but she was not going to admit that she was right.

"Well, I want to stay here."

"Is my body really that enticing?" Laura teased, quirking an eyebrow. 

"Really? That's the game you're going to play?"

Laura shrugged. 

"If you're going to give me the cold shoulder, I'll show you my shoulders."

Carmilla rolled her eyes all the way around the room. _This is ridiculous_. She noted to herself. Carmilla closed her eyes, trying to shut off the situation. Just when she got comfortable, she felt a weight on her abdomen. Carmilla's eyes shot open, and as she looked down at herself she realized Laura was straddling her.

"Uh what the frilly hell are you doing?" Carmilla asked, her heart skipping into a fast pace.

"This is what we did when we were kids, remember? Whenever you'd get mad or we'd be in a fight, I'd sit on you until we worked it out."

"Well, it's a little different then when we were kids cutie." Carmilla said, trying to get a grip of herself.

"How so?" Laura said. Carmilla jutted her head out, the answer obvious.

"We're both shirtless and you're straddling me- that's not as innocent as it was as we were children." 

Laura's cheeks flamed (much like Carmilla's homosexuality just then). Laura cleared her throat and shook it off.

"Well, I'm going to keep straddling you until you admit your wrongs."

Carmilla's eyes burned into a glare. _My wrongs? What about hers? Does she not think she's done any wrong?_  Carmilla scanned her honey brown eyes, and blinked a few times just to make sure she was serious.

"Oh my god. You mean that." Carmilla said. Laura shrugged as if to say 'maybe'. Carmilla groaned and rested her head back against the lounge chair, closing her eyes to ignore the shirtless girl straddling her down. "Do you think it'll work?" Carmilla said in a low voice.

"What?" Laura replied.

"Do you think, your little game will work?" She said with a bite, flicking her gaze back to Laura. "Do you think your little game will hold back the words that need to be said?" Carmilla said, propping herself up on her elbows. "Do you think this will make sure you don't have another thought you don't want to have about me again?" She added for good measure. Carmilla took victory in the way Laura's cheeks slowly turned pink. But to Carmilla, it didn't matter. To her, what mattered was the unresolved pang of hurt in her heart, the words she's wanted to say but never got a chance to, the questions she's wanted to ask. 

"You know what?" Carmilla said with a newfound determination. "If you're going to stay here until we talk about it, let's talk about it." Carmilla sat up a bit more, Laura clearly surprised by her sudden declaration. "You promised me. When we were kids, and I left, you promised me you'd call, that we'd stay in touch. You never did. I spent so many days just sitting by my laptop, waiting for your call, trapped with my mother. I was so alone!" Carmilla said, the pain from those dark, lonely days coming back. "I had to suffer alone! The only thing that got me through it was hopes that you'd call. Text, write me, _anything_! And you never did!" Carmilla was starting to get angry now, angrier than before, a fire bubbling inside of her that needed to be relieved.

"Then, the first night we reconnect, that first time and I held you in my arms and you promised me you weren't going anywhere. But you were the one that ran out of my apartment, that rushed out and abandoned me! When I needed you, after that mental patient came into my store, you pushed me away and kicked me out like everyone else in my life has!" Laura stared blankly back at Carmilla, something dancing in her eyes that Carmilla didn't have the patience to figure out. Carmilla shook her head to herself.

"Get off of me." She growled. Laura still sat on her, dazed by Carmilla's sudden proclamation. Carmilla rolled her eyes, and squirmed out from Laura's weight, then stormed off to her room.

 _Screw her._ She thought as she locked the door behind her.

 

**Danny**

 

Kirsch and Danny laid on his bed, his hefty arm around her shoulders, her head buried in his chest, arm wrapped around his waist, nuzzled into his side. Since the whole entire crazy-guy-might-have-killed-them thing, they've been close to inseparable, much more appreciative of each other to say the least. They sort-of talked through whatever he said to them, making the two even more inseparable. They took a couple days off of school, wanting to spend as much time together as possible. Kirsch and Danny didn't tell too many people what happened; the story so bizarre it was unbelievable to many. But one thing that Danny noted in her mind was that... Dare she say this... Carmilla volunteering herself to save all of their asses, which has changed Danny's views of Carmilla drastically. Her views on Laura has shifted as well, seeing the way she completely took down the attacker. Everything was changing, and Danny seemed to be the only one that noticed.

Kirsch muttered something inaudible, his voice quiet.

"What?" Danny asked, trying to comprehend what he said. Kirsch turned over so he was hovering over Danny, and placed his hand on her cheek.

"Marry me." He said, louder this time. Danny's eyes went wide. Marry him? Did she even want to? _I do_. The thought sent Danny into a panic. No, she's much too young to know she wants to marry someone. She's much too young to even marry! She stammered out a bunch of words, unsure of what to reply.

"What?" She managed to say. 

"Marry me. I realized then, when the crazy bro tried to kill us, that I don't want to break up. Like, ever." Kirsch stated. Her heart started to pound in her chest like a fist to a door. "I want to be with you forever, Danny Lawrence. And, I know this isn't the best proposal, but it's something for now." The look in his eyes... Danny started to panic. She wanted this- she really wanted to. Is that bad? That's bad, isn't it? Just a few days ago they were only looking at apartments with each other, and now this? How could she... How could... Danny slipped out of the bed from Kirsch, and ran her hands through her hair.

"I-I-I'm sorry. I have to go." She stammered out, and rushed to the door.

"Danny wait!" She heard Kirsch plead, but she couldn't turn back. As much as it ached, she couldn't turn back. Danny rushed out of the frat house, nearly sprinting down the path out of there. 

How could this have happened? How could she have fallen so fast? They've been together for years, but she never even thought of marrying him. But now that it's brought up, she finds that she wants to. She really, really wants to. That's not right, is it? She can't- that's not how- these feelings shouldn't be happening. This terrified her down to her core, every fiber in her being. She just needed to get out of there, but at the same time she wanted to run back into Kirsch's arms. She shouldn't want that- she shouldn't. 

 _What is wrong with me?_ She wondered as she paced away as far as she could.

 

**Laura**

 

 _Hour two and still no talking._ Laura thought to herself as she raided Carmilla's fridge, her shirt now on. _Did she color coat this?_ She wondered as she pulled a grape soda. The only way Laura really knows how to deal with her issue is with sugary goodness, and since there are a lack of cookies, this had to do. Laura was still dumbfounded by what Carmilla had told her, what she admitted, and it inspired a pang of guilt that she never knew could exist. 

She thought back to that summer when Carmilla left, and how much of a mess she was. Where her diet consisted of cookies and soda, her sleep schedule was never waking up, and her only emotion was the pain she felt of knowing Carmilla was gone. Of course she wanted to call her; she almost did on several occasions. But it was always this thought, this voice screaming in her head that if she did, she'd miss her more than she already did. And god, did she miss her; agonizingly so. The thought that she could miss her even more was enough to stop her from calling, but she didn't even think of what it did to Carmilla. 

Then, there was when she ran out of her apartment those days ago. All that was running through her mind was the fear that it could go somewhere, the fear that she actually wanted it to go somewhere. She hadn't even thought of what Carmilla was thinking, or what she was going through.

And then, kicking Carmilla out of her apartment. She was just so fueled with rage, angry at the recklessness to her being that she hadn't even considered what Carmilla might possibly going through, the pain that she had suffered. In fact, has she even thought about Carmilla? In everything she's done or said, it's been based off of her own fears and needs. Had she ever considered what Carmilla was thinking? What she was feeling?

Laura sighed. She hasn't. She's hardly ever taken into consideration of what Carmilla must be thinking, what she must be feeling. She only thought of herself and how she could have lost Carmilla, and that was enough to blink her to think about what she went through. In fact, has Laura only ever thought of herself? It was never like that when they were kids, right? Laura always put Carmilla before herself. Laura used to always put others before herself. But she kicked that habit long ago as she learned that she had to put herself before others to survive. Carmilla has changed too, Laura knows. Of course she'd change; they haven't seen each other in years. But now that they're back together and they've changed so much...

Have they've changed so much that they no longer work? Have the people they've become actually prove to be toxic for each other? The thought arose a panic inside of her, to think that they were no longer made for each other. Laura shook her head. No, no she's going to settle this. She's not going to allow this anymore; this is going to fix. This is going to fix right now.

As an after thought, Laura grabbed a second can of grape soda, and shut the fridge with her elbow. She made her way back to Carmilla's door, and with a bit of courage, she knocked on the door. 

"What?" Carmilla replied, her voice angry. Laura winced at the harsh greeting, but refused to back down.

"I, um... Are you thirsty?" She asked, remembering the cold drinks in her hand.

"No."

Laura wasn't going to give up that easy.

"You must be. You've been in there for hours."

"And I intend on staying in here for hours more."

Laura rolled her eyes.

"Will you just open the damn door?"

"As long as you're on the other side? No."

Okay. That was a dagger to her heart. Laura leaned her back against the door, letting her head thunk back against it. 

"Can you please come out?" She pleaded, closing her eyes. Silence was followed. Laura sighed heavily, though it did nothing to rid of the weight and pang in her chest. _Guess that's my answer._

Air replaced the door behind her, causing her body to fall. Laura's eyes flung open, expecting to hit the ground, but landed in slender arms instead.

"Oh, jesus creampuff! You tell me to open the door but you're leaning against it!" Carmilla exclaimed, helping Laura back to her feet.

"Sorry! I didn't think you were going to actually open it!"

Carmilla scoffed and pulled her arms off of Laura once Laura had regulated her balance. She turned around sheepishly, noting that Carmilla was now clothed. Laura was reminded of the soda in her hands still there. She awkwardly extended her arm.

"I, um, here." Laura managed to say. Carmilla eyed her strangely, but took the drink, much to Laura's relief. 

"Cool. You can go now." Carmilla tried to shut the door, but Laura stopped it with her hand.

"Wait."

Carmilla groaned an exaggerated groan.

"What is it now, creampuff?" Laura pursed her lips side to side, not sure how to go about saying this. Why did things with Carmilla always have to be so hard? 

"I, just... I'm sorry." Laura muttered, her voice quiet and filled with shame. "I've only been... I've only been thinking of myself, and I haven't even put into consideration what you must be going through, or what you must be thinking. And, I-" Laura bit her tongue. She was ready to work out their issues, but not the forbidden topic- not yet. "I'm just sorry." As Laura lifted her gaze to meet Carmilla's, she saw her usual hardened exterior soften.

"Um, it's okay. Just- don't look so sad." Carmilla replied softly, reaching out and placing a hand on Laura's shoulder for the briefest of moments. "I-" Laura held up her hand and stopped her. She had to say everything that's on her mind.

"I'm not finished." Carmilla's jaw clamped shut, so Laura continued. "I just... I was there that whole time. I was listening to everything that happened. And every time you offered up your life, took a beating, it just sent me into a wave of panic; and you did it a lot. I was angry because I was scared to lose you, but you don't seem to care about being reckless at all which scared me even more. I don't want to go through that again. I really, really don't want to lose you. I think I'm still in some denial that you could have got stabbed or something, especially since that whole entire speech he gave was just wild." A smile smile broke through Carmilla's expression, causing a small smile of her own. "But it doesn't excuse the way I've been behaving. And with everything we've been through over these past couple of weeks..." There it was, a glimmer in Carmilla's eyes, something Laura couldn't place a finger it. It was dancing at the tip of her tongue, to talk about the fact that they had admitted their feelings for each other.

"I just got you back. I don't want to lose you again- and for good." Laura decided to say instead. Carmilla sighed and ran her hand through her raven-colored hair.

"I know. I know." Carmilla said with another exasperated sigh. "And I'm sorry- for ignoring you asking for me to not be so reckless. I see where your coming from; if you acted the way I acted I'd be pretty pissed too." Laura let out a breathy chuckle. Carmilla smiled softly. "I think we rushed into things, yeah? Why don't we just start over? Forget everything that's happened over these past couple of months, and just start new." Carmilla extended her hand.  

"Friends?" Carmilla offered. _Friends?_ Laura didn't want to be just friends, but she's been ignoring Carmilla's wants and needs for far too long. She's going to have to hold off on her feelings for now. Laura smiled, and slipped her hand into Carmilla's.

"Friends." She said reluctantly. Carmilla smiled shyly, and nodded, shaking her hand. Laura hated this; she didn't want to be just friends. She wanted more; she realized it then that she wanted more. Laura regret the time she ran away, letting her fears get to her. She regrets not bringing these feelings up a moment ago when she had her chance. Because now, she realizes, that it's gone, and the thought that Carmilla doesn't feel the same anymore ran through her mind, though she did her best to hide her panic.

Laura heard rattling at the front door, soon opened. She turned her head to see JP and Lafontaine there, bags in JP's arms whilst some weird contraption in Lafontaine's. _What did they invent this week?_ Laura shook her head. _Doesn't matter._

"Hey guys." JP greeted, skipping up the steps. "All good?" He mouthed to Carmilla. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Carmilla nod. Lafontaine did the same to Laura, and she gave them a thumbs up. Laura looked back to Carmilla, spotting the soft smile on her face and inviting eyes. Laura smiled back, noticing the way her heart picked up it's pace the longer she gazed at Carmilla.

How will she ever fare with just being friends?

 

************

 

**Kirsch**

 

Days had passed since he saw or heard from Danny, and he missed her terribly. Going from inseparable to not seeing each other at all was a drastic change he was far from ready for; especially with this heightened concerned that something could have happened to her. But deep down, he knew that wasn't it. He knows its from his proposal, but the thing was, he didn't regret it. Not at all. 

He regrets that Danny ran out, and that this might be the reason they break up, but the truth was he wanted to marry Danny. Being faced with a near-death situation like that, he's realized she's his whole world. She's everything he's ever wanted, everything he'll ever need. And in that moment when he was faced with the crazed man with the knife, he realized that he never wants to spend a day longer in Danny not being with him forever. He can't be with her knowing that she won't marry him. If she's not ready, he'll understand. If she doesn't want to just yet, he'll understand. He just needs to know that one day they will, but if he can't then he doesn't know if he can be with her. That's just the truth. He wouldn't force her to marry him in some proclamation of; "if you'd love me..." or "the only way I'm staying is if..." No. He has to know it's coming from Danny, from her completely. If not, he understands; he just can't be with her if he knows it won't be forever.

Kirsch walked through the park, the time just barely reaching 6:30. It was dark out, the sun gone, sky black, stars out and all he could think of was the stupid connect-the-dots game they play as he gazed toward the sky. What would the sky be if he wasn't with Danny? What would the stars show if he wasn't the one who was lucky enough to call her his? How shall his life ever continue without the red head keeping him afloat? How would the stars continue to shine without Danny? How dare the world continue to turn if-

His shoe lace got caught under his foot, and he face-planted, plummeting to the ground, his large body collapsing on the trail with a large thud. 

"Ow!" He exclaimed. "Not cool bro." Kirsch chastised the ground.

"I told you that you should keep your shoes tied." Said the familiar angelic voice. His heart stopped in his chest for a moment, the words last spoken between them running through his mind. Is that... He slowly lifted his gaze to see the only girl to ever keep his world spinning, and he had totally just fallen in front of her. _Of course this would happen in front of D-Bear._

"I, uh." Kirsch quickly scurried to his feet, dusting off his clothes. "Hi." Kirsch said, sliding his hands into his pockets.

"Hey." Danny replied with a soft smile. Why did he have to see her in the moonlight? Her features always glowed in the moonlight. "Walk with me?" She asked. Kirsch nodded reluctantly. _Great. I fall, and now she's going to break up with me._ They walked side by side in silence for a few moments, the gentle light of the night sky illuminating the area, a few lamp posts shining along the trail. He stared toward the ground, not knowing if he'd be able to look at her as she dumped him. He knew it was coming; silence always happens before a big break up. She's going to tell him that he's an idiot, remind him that he doesn't deserve her, and ask him why he'd ever think someone as great as her would ever want to spend the rest of her life with an idiot like him.

"Yes." She suddenly said. 

"Look, I'd get why you'd want to break up with m-" Kirsch stopped dead in his tracks. _Yes?_ Wait a second, did she not just dump him? "Yes?" Kirsch repeated in disbelief. Danny stopped in front of him, that soft smile still on her lips.

"Yes. I will marry you."

Kirsch's heart skipped into a fast pace, a wide smile forming on his cheeks. A sudden burst of excitement rushed through him; a happiness he's never known coursing throughout.

"Oh my gosh!" Kirsch wrapped his hefty arms around Danny's waist and picked her up, spinning them around. Danny's arms clasped around his neck like they fit there as she giggled adorably. 

"Okay, okay. But," she was interrupted with a laugh, "but." She repeated as Kirsch set her down. "Not now. I want to get my education first and finish college. Maybe sometime after, but not now."

He nodded.

"Of course, of course. I totally get that." Kirsch said eagerly, willing to comply to whatever demands she had.

"One day."

He smiled.

"One day. And I promise I'll make a bomb ass proposal." He replied. Danny smiled, and placed her hand on his cheek.

"You do that."

Kirsch brought her in for a kiss, an overwhelming happiness coursing through his body and bubbling in his stomach.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

With a shit-eating grin, they approached Laura on the couch. She's barely spoken of what happened between her and Carmilla, only saying they 'made up', but Lafontaine was dying to know. They made a cozy seat next to her, waiting for her to pause whatever she was watching to look at them. When she finally did, they raised their eyebrows.

"Need something?" She asked, confusion clear in her voice.

"So uh, you never told me what happened with you and Carmilla." They said, wiggling their eyebrows.

"We made up." Laura said simply. Lafontaine gave her a look, waiting for more details. Laura's jaw dropped. "Oh, god not like that!" Lafontaine tilted their head to the side in bewilderment. _Not like that?_ "No, no. We just, we're friends now." Lafontaine's eyes went wide.

"WHAT!" They exclaimed. Oh no, they did not spend days making an invention just for them to be friends- don't they both have feelings for each other?

"Okay, we're not going to burst Laura's eardrum." She said, rubbing her ear.

"What do you mean your only friends?" They said in disbelief.

"I mean, we made up. We're friends."

"But don't you-"

"I don't know about her anymore." Laura said, the air suddenly tense as she fidgeted with her fingers for a moment. Lafontaine immediately regretted pushing Laura as a shade of sorrow faded her eyes. "But, it doesn't matter. I can do with friends." Lafontaine nodded. This clearly upset Laura, and they knew not to press anymore. They smiled softly, and nudged her with their elbow.

"Hey. Why don't we stuff our faces with popcorn and watch bad sci-fi?"

Laura smiled, and nodded.

"Yeah. Let's do that." 

They smiled, and flipped through the channels. This was not good; not good at all.

They're going to have to do something about this.

 

**Carmilla**

 

She knows she has to face JP eventually- she's been avoiding him for days. The reason being she knows as soon as they start talking, he'll ask what happened with Laura and herself, and to be honest she wants to forget that ever happened. They're talking now at least, which is better than the sporadic schedule of no talking to talking that they previously had going. Carmilla still regrets asking for only friendship, but she hates the fact that Laura so eagerly agreed. It's ridiculous, she knows, because she's the one that suggested it, but did Laura have to seem so eager? So compliant? Carmilla sighed heavily.

It wasn't fair. She was so close- they were so close. They both had admitted their feelings for each other, they both were alone for hours on end, yet all she could manage was to make them friends? And Laura was eager to do it? She apologized, which was the only good thing that came of the day. But yet, Carmilla doesn't even know if Laura still had feelings for her. She wouldn't be surprised if she didn't; in fact, she accepts that. Carmilla will just have to fare with being friends for now.

A gentle knock on her door reminded her of what she was going to do. Carmilla sighed, and positioned herself upright on the bed.

"Come in!" She called, but immediately cleared her throat. "COME IN!" Better. That's how she and JP always communicated- not changing now.The door slowly creaked open and JP walked in, Mircalla following suit. She jumped up on Carmilla's bed, nuzzling into her lap. She purred as Carmilla started to stroke her onyx fur in the soothing pattern she always does.

"Hey. You wanna talk about what happened?" He said casually. Carmilla sighed in relief. She always forgot how great JP was with this stuff when she needed it. She shrugged.

"Why not?"

JP flopped down on the end of her bed, hands clasped behind his head.

"So are you guys together or what?"

Carmilla sighed heavily, trying to find sanctuary in petting the cat.

"Nah. We... I decided to be friends." She admitted, the words like venom rolling off her tongue. He nodded slowly.

"Sucks."

"I know."

"Is there anything else?" JP asked.

Carmilla shook her head. That was all she could talk of without the familiar ache in her head. He sighed, and pushed himself off the bed.

"If you need some get-over-her ice cream or whatever you lesbians do," Carmilla rolled her eyes, "just give me a holler." JP said.

"How sweet." Carmilla replied, her voice ridden with sarcasm. "Thanks." He gave her a quick nod.

"Yeah." He said as he shut the door behind him. Carmilla sighed once more, and stared down to the cat in her lap.

_Why can't I just forget about all my problems and shift into a giant black cat?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos! Y'all are wonderful people.


	22. Going Back To The Start

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe things will better if they just go back... But will the now take over the past?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fkin hell

**Carmilla**

 

 _I hate this. I hate everything. I hate my life. I hate myself._ Carmilla thought to herself, her leg bobbing up and down like the wings to a hummingbird as she sat a nervous wreck, waiting to board what she knew to be a total death machine. She took a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves.

Why did she ever agree to this?

 

_This 'just friends' thing wasn't as bad as Carmilla had thought, but the time was reaching the most dreadful time of all for her; Christmas. It was the dawning of the first week to December, and already the 'spirit' of the dreaded holiday was spreading like a disease. Festive lights hanging about, decoratives on the park trees, couples in ugly Christmas sweaters, Christmas franchise- you name it._

_She has hated Christmas since she was a child. On the times where her father was alive, Christmas wasn't terrible. Though she didn't care for the holiday at all; it all was circled around the fact that her father was home, and spending as much time with him as possible before he was shipped back to the war. The holiday was always a reminder of how her father eventually had to leave, and once he was gone for good, the days were empty. Just her, William, and sometimes mother. She'd always just grab her presents from the Christmas tree and open them by herself in her room. Sometimes William would join, but it was mostly on her own._

_And now, she finds, she's going to be on her own yet again. William couldn't make it home, and Mattie was swamped with work. The crew was leaving to return home for break, marking yet another year of this dreadful holiday where she'd be alone._

_Now, Carmilla was sitting in her room with Laura, listening to her talk about whatever as they watched some British TV show. She was going to miss her, that's for sure, so she wanted to spend as much time as possible with her before the inevitable departure. Laura sat crossed-legged next to her, her laptop perched on her lap as Carmilla laid next to her, the TV show playing off the screen, though Carmilla couldn't focus on it. She only had eyes for the girl next to her, and how beautiful she looked in a ponytail. How will she survive a couple weeks without her? She's the only light in her life. Everything had changed for Carmilla since she found her way back into her lonely days; Carmilla doesn't want to go back to that._

_"Do you think he's going to be the one that's killed?" Laura asked, pointing to some character on the screen. Carmilla shrugged, and tucked her hands behind her head._

_"Maybe." She replied, still not having a clue for what's going on to the images that danced on the screen._

_"I was right- you weren't paying attention. He was already dead." What?_ _Laura closed her laptop and looked down toward Carmilla, her honey-brown eyes shadowed in concern. "What's on your mind, Carm?" Carmilla sighed, and put on her best smile._

_"Nothings on my mind." She replied, doing her best to fake her well-being._

_"This whole week you've been extremely out of it; what's wrong?" Laura persisted. Carmilla shrugged. "Okay, the guessing game. I can do that." Oh great. "Is it your brother?" Carmilla shook her head. "Sister?" Another shake to her head. "Family things?" She shook her head again. "Okay, um... Is it going back to work?" She shook her head again. In all honesty, returning to work was a lot easier than she imagined. Plus, with the publicity she got from the little incident, her store has been flourishing. The guy who attacked her had made some public announcement on the TV, saying they'll never catch him. Then named her store. So really, things just worked out. Well, besides the fact that the damned police really haven't caught him yet._

_"Alright, I'm terrible at the guessing game. Can you just tell me what's wrong?"_

_Carmilla sighed heavily._

_"It's pathetic." She admitted, watching Laura's eyebrows knit in concern._

_"Whatever is making you all broody isn't pathetic." Laura replied, and she said it with so genuinely that Carmilla almost believed it to be true. Carmilla shook her head._

_"It is. It's pathetic, really." She sighed, and clasped her hands on her abdomen, twiddling her thumbs._

_"Carmilla. Don't make me make you tell me." Laura said, a hint of mischief in her eyes. Carmilla raised her eyebrows in surprise._

_"Really?" She challenged, her voice low._

_"You and I are the only ones who knows you're ticklish." Laura retaliated, a small smirk forming on her lips._

_"You wouldn't dare."_

_"Try me."_

_Carmilla squinted at Laura. She wasn't going to take the chance of being tickled- it has to be the worst thing to writhe and giggle like a schoolgirl._

_"Fine." Carmilla muttered. "But only because I don't feel like being assualted right now." Carmilla tried to collect her thoughts, pondering how to go about this without earning any pity. "I, um..." She sighed. "I'm... I- jesus, I'm pathetic. I'm going to be all alone here for Christmas." Carmilla covered her face with her hands as Laura's eyes softened. "God, I'm pathetic." She murmured._

_"Carmilla! No your not. Isn't there anywhere you can go? Anyone you can see?"_

_She shook her head._

_"Mattie's swamped with work, and William has to stay stationed. JP is going to see his Aunt, and you guys are all going home. So that leaves me... Alone."_ Why did I just admit all of that? _Carmilla hated confessing her vulnerabilities, making her seem so weak. It always ended with pity and-_

_"Why don't you go with us?" Laura suddenly said, and it was enough for Carmilla to lower her hands from her face, meeting Laura's gaze again._

_"What?" Carmilla found herself saying._

_"Yeah. Come with us, you know? Back to our home town. My dad offered for you to stay with us actually, but I just assumed you were busy."_

_Carmilla cocked her eyebrow._

_Going back to that place... It didn't seem terrible. That was the town where she was with Laura, where she first met her, where she last saw her, where she first kissed her. Where everything happened... If she goes back to the start... Will it lead somewhere? Carmilla pursed her lips side to side, taking this into consideration. Going back to the start... She has to try. Plus, it gives her something to do and somewhere to go instead of spending the days alone like a brooding loser. Carmilla nodded._

_"Okay. I'll go."_

_Laura smiled wide._

_"Perfect. Now," she re-opened the laptop, "you're going to watch this." Carmilla groaned._

_"I really don't care for it."_

_"Too bad."_

_"You're cruel."_

_"I know."_

 

And that is how Carmilla ended up here, sitting in an airport, about to be doing the number one thing she fears the most; flying on an airplane. She's flown a few times in her life, all for moving purposes, but it's never gotten any easier. The only thing keeping her sane was the girl next to her. And even then, they weren't even on the plane yet; they were waiting for the intercom to announce their flight. Kirsch and Danny were acting like lovesick idiots- which Carmilla made sure to tease them for later, and pester them about because something has definitely happened. Lafontaine and Perry were acting as usual; Perry flipping out about everything not being 'normal' or 'perfect' and Lafontaine calming her down.

Carmilla rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. She should just leave the airport. She should take a boat instead. Hell, she'd rather swim across the ways of the ocean instead of flying. Her leg bobbed up and down relentlessly. She looked around every three seconds, unable to sit still, unable to calm her racing mind. She suddenly felt a firm hand on her thigh, stopping the bobbing mid... Bob? She couldn't even think. Carmilla turned her head to meet the gaze of honey-brown eyes, brows knitted in concern.

"You okay?" She asked softly.

"I hate flying." Carmilla replied truthfully. She failed to mention this earlier, not wanting to add more stress to the group. Traveling in a pack like this- not as easy as it's made out to be. It was like that scene in Home Alone 2, only Carmilla wishes she was forgotten and left at home. Laura gently stroked her thumb over her thigh in a soothing manner, and if Carmilla wasn't so jittery she's sure it would awaken her body more than it was.

"You'll be okay." Laura said with a soft smile. 

"Tell me that when we land." Carmilla muttered. "What if we end up like that flight on Malaysia, you know? Disappear into thin air. What if the pilot crashes the plane into the ground? That happened- both of those things happened. Whose to say it's not going to happen to us?" Carmilla spewed out lines of panic, thinking to every tragedy that has ever occurred with planes. "Oh God- that person is looking at me funny. What if they're going to crash the plane? What if the plan crashes on it's own accord? What if we go off schedule! What if-"

"Carmilla- Carmilla! Breathe." Laura said. Carmilla nodded. Breathing- she's forgotten to do that for the past few minutes. She took a few deep breaths, trying to calm the bundle of nerves she was. Carmilla whipped out her ticket.

"Are you sure we're next to each other? What if it's different with this flight? What if we're not and I end up next to some old guy?" Carmilla asked, examining her ticket. Laura pulled out hers, and Carmilla compared them.

"It's not different for this flight. You're 36B, I'm 36A. I booked it, remember? Do you not trust me?"

"I trust you." Carmilla found herself saying all too quickly. Where did that come from? She handed Laura's ticket back to her, her own still clung tightly in her hand.

"Awe, what's wrong broody gay?" Kirsch asked. Carmilla gave him a pointed look.

"Nothing, Bromeo." Carmilla replied. "Maybe I'm just filled with disdain at the sight of you and Xena being all lovey-dovey." She teased. Kirsch laughed.

"Of course we're acting all lovey-dovey! That's what couples do- duh."

Carmilla rolled her eyes. She jumped nearly 10 feet in her seat when she heard the intercom announce their flight. 

"Oh- fucking hell! Do they have to be so loud?" Carmilla exclaimed, rushing to her feet. Laura simply laughed, Perry forcing Lafontaine to rush over to the line forming.

"Come on. Let's go, scaredy cat." Despite her fears, Carmilla found herself smiling, blindly following Laura into the line. She stood close next to her in line as it slowly inched forward, eventually reaching their place. Carmilla nearly punched the guy as she handed him her ticket, her nerves shooting through her. He smiled once he scanned it, handing it back to her.

"Have a good flight, ma'am." He said.

"You too! Wait, I mean." Carmilla sighed. "Are you on this flight? Will you be joining us? Cause if not what I said was really awkward. I didn't mean to say that, unless you're joining us. And-"

"Okay, okay." Laura said, wrapping her hand in Carmilla's. "We're going." She dragged her down the tube and into the flight.

This is going to be hell on earth. 

After a while, they got settled into the plane, every jerk and sound coming from the plane sending Carmilla down a quick panic. She breathed heavy, trying to regulate her breathing and nerves. Laura held her hand tightly, that being her only sanctuary in the death machine. The pilot announced over the intercom that they were taking off, and a lot of other useless gibberish Carmilla couldn't pay attention to as the plane started. She held Laura's hand in a death grip as the plane moved, her hands shaking. 

"Here. Let me just..." Laura reached over Carmilla, and pulled the blinds to the window up. "Look out the window." She muttered softly. 

"What?" Carmilla replied.

"Look out the window. Look." She pointed to the glass, and Carmilla switched her gaze to it, watching as the plane began to speed down the runway, only heightening her fears. Carmilla squeezed her eyes shut. "No no, don't do that. Open your eyes." She said gently, and Carmilla found her eyes opening again, looking back out the window. "Watch- it's fun to watch as we go into the clouds." Carmilla watched as the ground started to shrink before them, the plane practically screaming, the greens becoming blended. Cars moved as though they weren't in a death machine, going to their destination without a care for the rise of this plane. "Isn't it weird how small things are getting? I never understood that. And do we go more distance when we're higher? Or if we were on the ground right now, would we be covering the same distance?" The question really made Carmilla think for a moment. Was that how it really worked?

"Oh, nice. Here comes my favorite part!" Laura whispered enthusiastically, and suddenly the window was shrouded with the white, airy mist that were the clouds. "Isn't it neat how they look up close? Ready, and now comes the best part." The clouds were no longer covering the window, instead, they were flying above them. "Doesn't it kind of look like the sea, in a way? Like a sea of clouds. Pretty cool, right?" Carmilla nodded, entranced by the ocean of clouds, the shapes they made, the way the sun bounced and reflected off them. As the pilot spoke over the intercom once more, announcing it was okay to take off their seat-belts and lower their trays, Carmilla realized her panic was gone. _How did she..._

Carmilla peeked at her out of the corner of her eye, meeting her soft gaze. Carmilla thanked her with a small smile. Laura nodded, and kissed the back of Carmilla's hand before redirecting her attention back to her phone. Carmilla stared at her in awe.

_How does she always know what I need when I need it?_

 

**Laura**

 

The group soon landed, and were greeted by family members and big hugs. Her father looked shocked when he saw Carmilla, and they had a lengthy discussion on the car ride home. She could only smile, watching the way they interacted; just like when they were younger. He would say something, oblivious to how awkward the question was. She would smile politely, and fidget with her hands, and do her best to answer the question or statement. 

As they finally arrived at home, Carmilla seemed bewildered by Laura's room, dropping her suitcase to the ground. It inspired memories to play inside of Laura's mind, remembering all the sleepovers they had as children, the times Carmilla had come over here, the times they shared, the sleepovers they had. She mentally played back the years she's known Carmilla to the woman she is now, looking around her room in awe.

"Wow." Carmilla muttered with a huff of laughter. "This brings back memories, huh?" She asked, turning on her heel to face Laura. Laura smiled softly, and nodded.

"Yeah." She quirked an eyebrow. "You know what really would bring back memories?" Laura added, taking a step forward, her mind on the pillow on her bed. 

"What?" Carmilla asked. What she wasn't expecting was for Laura to smack her upside the head with a pillow, knocking her back a bit. Carmilla's jaw dropped. "Oh it's on, cupcake." She said, grabbing a pillow of her own, chasing Laura around her room.

"No!" Laura squealed, laughing as she tried to escape Carmilla's attempts to smack her. 

"Come here! We have to get even!" Carmilla exclaimed, barely brushing the pillow past Laura's legs. 

"No!" She squealed again, and bolted out the door. Carmilla was soon to chase her, but it was cut short as Laura bumped into her father, in turn crashing back into Carmilla. Carmilla caught her before she could fall, and momentarily Laura forgot about everything, until she noticed the strange look her father gave them.

"Uh, hey girls. Whats-"

"Pillow fight." Laura replied quickly. He cocked an eyebrow, and was about to say something, but seemed to change his mind.

"You know what? Not even gonna question it." He said with a shrug. "Anyway, I'm heading down to the store. Do you girls want to come, or are you too jet-lagged?" Laura tilted her head upward to meet Carmilla's gaze.

"Jet-lagged." They said in unison. He laughed lightly.

"Still speaking at the same time, I see. Cool, well, I'll be off then. Make sure you get Wilson, Danny, Lafontaine and Perry here sometime- I miss them like crazy!" He exclaimed. Laura smiled.

"I will, dad."

He smiled back, and saluted towards her.

"I'll be off then." He said.

"See ya." Laura replied. He disappeared down the stairs, and as soon as the last step creaked a pillow was relentlessly whacking her as she sprung to her feet. 

"Victory is mine!" Carmilla exclaimed proudly.

"No way!" Laura replied, smacking her with her pillow.

"Back down, Hollis!"

"In your dreams, Karnstein!" The two smiled and laughed as they smacked each other with pillows, an all out war with sacks of fluff flying through the air and striking each other.

 _This was such a good idea._ Laura thought to herself.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Being back home was weird- extremely weird. It was an odd enough change from going to Austria to America, from an apartment to a house, from living with friends to living with their family. What was even odder was the lack of seeing Perry, instead being replaced with seeing their family. It was nice to see them again. They were always supportive of them, which they've always appreciated. But there was always that underlying push of 'what are you going to do when you get out of college?' That was always the part that they hated the most.

They loved their family; loved them to death. But the fact remained that they pushed them, always wanted to know what they were doing next, and even make 'suggestions" (meaning passive-aggressive commands) of what they should do with their life, what they should be doing, and what they're doing wrong. The only person who made these types of things better was Perry; and she's spending time with her family.

They sighed, and flopped down on the couch as their phone buzzed. They groaned, and pulled it out of their pocket.

_**Laura:** My dad wants to throw a reunion tomorrow. You down?_

They shrugged. It would be nice to deal with other people's parents rather than their own.

_**Lafontaine:** Sounds good._

Any escape to this hell of a family would be good enough. It would only be a few hours until her uncles and aunts arrived- those being the worst of them. Some of them were accepting and loving- some were conservative Christians that still called Lafontaine a girl. The thought made them shudder.

 _I wonder how Laura and Carmilla are doing..._ They thought with a grin.

 

**Laura**

 

This had to be the best/worst decision Laura has ever made. For one, she and Carmilla were going to have to share a bed. It's great because they get to share a bed, sleep next to each other, but terrible because they're still going with this 'just friends' thing, and Laura still has no clue if Carmilla still feels the same for her. She hates herself for walking out when it was right there, right in the palm of her hands and she just left. She hates not admitting her feelings when she had the chance to. But... It's in the past. There's nothing she can do to change that;

But she can certainly change the now. 

Laura crawled into her bed as the first day drew to a close, well for them anyway. It was only 6:30 PM, but both of them were on the brink of passing out. Eyes heavy, minds groggy, bodies sluggish. Carmilla crawled in soon after, barely having enough energy to pull up the covers.

"How the hell am I going to fly on a plane and go through this a second time?" Carmilla muttered, her breathing slow, and tiresome. Laura let her eyes close, Carmilla only inches apart from her.

"I'll be there to make it easier for you." Laura murmured, scarcely having the energy to get her words out. She felt Carmilla shift next to her, and when she opened her eyes she almost leapt back, Carmilla's face only inches from hers. 

"Can you promise me something?" Carmilla asked, her eyes at half mass. 

"Of course." Laura replied, her breath gone from the close proximity. Carmilla pursed her lips for a moment, and shook her head.

"Never mind. I'll ask when I'm not brain dead."

Laura laughed, and nodded.

"Sounds good."

It didn't take long for sleep to take over their bodies, though the question stayed in a corner of Laura's mind.

 

**Danny**

 

She awoke abruptly at 2 AM from the random buzzing from her cellphone. She groaned loudly. Who dared text her at this early in the morning? It better not be someone back from Austria she swears to god. _There is a thing called time zones, people_. She thought to herself as she wiped her eyes, adjusting to the brightness of her screen.

_**Danny's Future Husband:** Meet me @ track in 10 min. Old times sake?_

Danny rolled her eyes.

_**Danny:**  Can we do it later? I'm exhausted._

_**Danny's Future Husband:** Please?_

_**Danny:**  I'm going 2 pass out. Like, now_

_**Danny's Future Husband:** :((((_  
_**Danny's Future Husband:** Okay_  
_**Danny's Future Husband:** But we're doing this eventually_

 _ **Danny:** Sure sure_  
_**Danny:** But I'm literally going to die if I stay awake any longer_

_**Danny's Future Husband:** K. Nite. Love you_

_**Danny:** Dweeb._  
_**Danny:** (I love you too)_

She smiled, and placed her phone back on her drawer, not taking too long to fall back asleep again.

 

_ **THE NEXT DAY** _

 

**Laura**

 

Waking up in Carmilla's arms had to be the most natural feeling in the world, but it was short lived when she remembered this whole entire 'friends' thing. But yet again, friends cuddle, right? That's perfectly friendship-y. Carmilla's arm was wrapped tightly around Laura's waist, Laura's back to her front, curled into each other like two pieces to a puzzle. Laura smiled to herself. This felt so natural, but why? Why did it feel like things were supposed to be this way? She's never felt so sure about anything in her life, but if that were the case then why did she run away? Laura sighed. She had to stop dwelling over that- she knows she can't change it. But, she can certainly get used to this. 

She felt Carmilla's rhythmical heart beat against her back, her slender hand wrapped tightly in hers, her warm body pressed against her, heard her gentle breaths as they brushed past her neck. 

The serene moment was ruined when the annoying sound of her alarm clock blared through. Laura and Carmilla groaned in unison.

"I'm not getting that." Carmilla grumbled, her lips moving against the back of Laura's neck. Laura rolled her eyes and slammed her hand down on the alarm, freeing their eardrums from the deafening blare.

"Come on. Time to get up." Laura said, giving Carmilla's hand a comforting squeeze. Carmilla hummed in response, holding Laura tighter. "We have things to do. Remember, sleepyhead? A huge reunion today."

Carmilla simply groaned. Laura smiled softly to herself, but didn't let it last long. She can't hold onto this feeling, the thought that she could see herself doing this on a Sunday morning, rings on both of their fingers, children of theirs that they needed to take care of... Laura quickly shook off the thought.

"If you don't get up, I'm going to play the Harry Potter movies back to back."

Carmilla shot up immediately.

"I'm awake!"

Laura chuckled, and crawled out of bed. 

"You know what we're going to do?" She said, determined on an idea already forming in her mind.

"What are we gonna do, cupcake?"

"We're going to go for a walk- it's been ages since you've been here." 

 

**Lafontaine**

 

"Why don't you apply to a better college? I'm sure there are plenty who'd want you- especially a genius like you." Lafontaine's mother said. Lafontaine was sitting in their living room, half listening to whatever their family said, sipping coffee- black. They always take it with creamer, or sugar- whatever. But being back home, they found they were completely done with life. 

Lafontaine shrugged, and took a long, long sip of their coffee, filling the silence after the question. 

"Maybe I actually like it at Silas University." Lafontaine replied quietly, staring off into the distance.

"Yeah, but it's all the way in Austria." Lafontaine's brother said next. "That's like, totally lame."

"You're 17. Where are you going to college?" Lafontaine asked, trying to focus the attention on him.

"Not at Silas University." 

They rolled their eyes.

"Yeah Lafontaine. Why stay there?" Lafontaine's dad said. Lafontaine sighed, and took a long sip of their coffee. They didn't have the patience to explain their life choices.

"Dunno." They simply said, arising from their chair and going to the kitchen. 

It's going to be hell on earth if their family keeps this up.

 

**Carmilla**

 

"You know, cutie, the near-death experience I had doesn't even come close to the torture of this." Carmilla said as she and Laura walked side by side. Laura rolled her honey-brown eyes and laughed her melodic laugh.

"Oh come on. Don't be such a grouch. We're just walking around; I want to show you what's new." Laura hooked her arm into Carmilla's, and suddenly the walking wasn't as bad. 

As they walked through the neighborhood, down the streets, memories of her childhood flooded her mind. She remembers walking down here as a child, playing man hunt or hide and go seek with their friends, walking to the mall with Laura, listening to her babble a hundred words per second as she spoke. A few houses have changed; been renovated. They passed her old house not too long ago, and saw it had been repainted, and a fence had been put up. She remembers the times she's walked to Laura's house all those days, taking the bus with her to school. 

She looked to the honey-brown eyed girl to her right, thinking of how much she's changed since then, how they found each other throughout the crazy somehow. In all the madness of the world they were put back together, back in each other's lives. Carmilla smiled to herself, thinking of all the times they've had as kids. But now, here she was, walking arm-in-arm with her, the girl she swore she'd never see again. How lucky she was to have her back in her life; even if they could only be friends.

A cold breeze reminded Carmilla that she could be sleeping in a nice, warm bed right then, instead of walking the frigid streets.

"I could be in a cozy bed right now." She grumbled, the thought already more appeasing than these steps. It was cold out too, though Carmilla was properly dressed. She wore her infamous leather pants, combat boots, and a black sweater. But still, the cold somehow made it to her, biting her cheeks and somehow making her more wary. Suddenly, Laura took a step in front of her and stopped in her tracks, going into a weird squatting position.

"Uh... As much as I love having a girl bent over in front of me, what the frilly hell are you doing?"

Laura laughed.

"Hop on."

Carmilla's eyebrows shot to her hairline.

"You serious?" She asked, unsure if the girl had the strength to carry her.

"Yep. Come on."

Carmilla looked around the neighborhood, making sure no one was looking. With an exaggerated sigh, she hopped onto her back, Laura's arms wrapping around her legs, Carmilla's arms clasped around Laura's neck. To her surprise, Laura straightened out no problem, adjusting Carmilla with a hop.

"Geez- you're stronger than you look, cutie."

Laura laughed, the vibrations to her melodic laugh running through Carmilla. A harsh gust of wind rolled over, attacking every exposed skin to Carmilla. She shivered, and held Laura closer, feeling each bump to the walk. 

"Are you cold?" Laura asked softly.

"No." She lied. "Are you?" 

"Carmilla I can feel you shivering."

"Well, it's like negative thirty degrees out- I'm going to be a little bit cold." Carmilla really didn't want Laura worrying about her- that's all she's been doing since they made up. She checks on her bruises, her slashes, how she's doing, makes sure she wasn't going to have a mental breakdown. Carmilla wasn't used to it; the nurturing and care Laura gave her, but she'd be lying if she said she didn't enjoy it. Well, when it wasn't overwhelming.

"Here, how about this instead; let's go back, make hot cocoa, and watch Doctor Who- just like old times, yeah? We can do this when we actually have a car and it's not-so-cold out." Carmilla smiled slightly, and rested her chin on her clasped arms.

"Yeah. I like the sound of that." 

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Seeing Perry walk into their room was a relief they have never known. They thanked whatever forces of nature there were that Perry decided to visit. Lafontaine smiled warmly at her, and patted the spot next to their bed. She nuzzled in, and they let their head fall onto her shoulder.

"You know, every time I'm away from my family I think; well, they're not so bad... But every time I come here I'm reminded of how incredibly wrong I am."

Perry laughed her sweet laugh and ran her hand through their hair in the way that never failed to make them relax.

"I know. My family is hell on earth too- I think you're forgetting that this 'everything-needs-to-be-perfect' thing I have runs through my whole entire family. A bunch of panicked curly gingers running around is not as pleasant as it sounds."

Lafontaine laughed and nuzzled in closer.

"How are they?" Lafontaine asked.

"Your family or mine?"

"Both."

Perry sighed.

"My family is calm- for now at least. They can't wait to see you again. I think they're more interested in how you are than they are me." Perry proclaimed. Lafontaine grinned. "Your family is just wondering when you'll get over this jet lag. Nice excuse, by the way." Lafontaine laughed.

"Only one I had." They replied, noticing the calm Perry brought over them.

"You need to talk to them eventually." She rested her hand on their cheek. "They miss you." Lafontaine sighed. They know that, but it's still extremely aggravating and draining to stay in the same room as them for more than 3 seconds.

"I will- eventually. I'm going to have to anyway for that reunion party, remember? For now, can we just cuddle?"

Perry smiled, and patted their cheek.

"Of course."

Lafontaine's smile somehow got wider, their heart swelling in their chest. God, they loved this woman. Why not share that little tidbit of info?

"Hey. Guess what?"

"What?"

"I really love you. Like- really really love you."

Perry laughed her sweet laugh, sounding as though it could warm the coldest of hearts.

"I love you too."

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch and Danny stood in his room, Danny fixing his shirt. Apparently, popping his collar still didn't fly. The two were getting ready to walk next door to Laura's house for a reunion, which Kirsch was more than excited for. It had been a while since the three families reconnected, and even longer since Carmilla was there with them. It'll be just like old times.

"I'm telling ya babe; this is going to be super fun." Kirsch said, his excitement almost overwhelming. Danny smiled, smoothing out the collar to his shirt.

"Yeah. Let's just hope you don't get so drunk that you try to steal the food by stuffing it down your pants like last year."

Kirsch chuckled, and rested his hands on her hips, like they were made to fit there.

"Oh come on. It wasn't that bad." He said with a grin. Danny rolled her eyes and draped her arms over his shoulders.

"It _was_ bad. You were just too drunk to remember." Danny corrected. He snickered lightly, staring in awe at the electric blue eyes that have sworn to marry him one day, his heart swelling in his chest at the thought. He remembers standing here as a teen, both of them terrified as their first times were about to happen. He remembers laying on the bed, and falling off, postponing it for about 30 more minutes because Danny could not stop laughing. He remembers standing here, checking himself out to make sure he looked okay for his first date, Laura helping him prepare, fixing his hair and picking out his tie. He remembers sitting on his bed, and talking of the future with Danny, learning weeks apart that they had gotten into the same school, him much later than Danny. 

Kirsch smiled softly to himself. Now, he's making a new memory, standing here and thinking of the day that they're going to get married. One day, he'll be standing before her, saying 'I do's' to each other as they choke back tears. He'll think back to this day, think back to when he wished time would just hurry up so he can get on with it and marry the girl to his dreams.

"What?" Danny said, breaking him out of his trance. He shrugged.

"You just make me really happy."

Danny made something between an inaudible gasp and an 'awe' as she placed her hand over her collarbone. 

"Don't do that! You can't get me all emotional before we go." Danny said, resting her forehead on his shoulder. Kirsch smiled, and wrapped his burly arms around her, fitting like two pieces to a puzzle.

"I can't help it; you just make me all smiley and goofy." 

"Your such a sap." Danny teased, clasping her arms around his neck.

"Yeah, well you're going to marry this sap one day."

She pulled her head back, a wide smile spread across her cheeks.

"Dork."

"Summer Psycho."

She rolled her eyes.

"You can't make fun of my and my sorority when yours was called Zeta Omega Mu."

Kirsch laughed a loud laugh.

"How were we ever popular in high school?"

Danny shrugged.

"Beats me." She replied.

"Maybe it was because you were so cute."

Danny groaned, and pressed her lips to his.

"Gross." She muttered on his lips. He smiled, and tugged her into a kiss.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla had to admit; this was more fun than she expected. It was almost overwhelming the attention she was receiving from the families she left long ago, reminding her of the life she used to lead, the life she had here. She forgot what it was like to actually be in a family, and that this was the closest to a normal family she had. Of course, she had William and Mattie, but she never gets to see them. This was just one large family. They asked her questions, hugged her, welcomed her back in as though she wasn't gone all this time. It was different than anything she'd ever experienced; she was welcomed somewhere. What made it better was the glow that Laura seemed to have tonight.

She was smiling bright and wide, talking to everyone, her hair added with an extra bounce, dressed in formal attire. She looked incredible, as always. It must be being here, in this big family, that brought this glow out in her. Carmilla couldn't help but smile, watching how Laura was so natural here, how everyone was just in this large family. Was this what it was like? To have a family? Was it supposed to feel this good, this joyous? 

Laura suddenly was by her side, and placed a hand on the small of her back, her eyes soft and patient.

"Are you doing okay?" She asked quietly. Carmilla cocked an eyebrow. Doing okay? This was the most fun she's had in so long. 

"Yeah. I'm doing great; why?"

Laura smiled.

"I just wanted to make sure; I know crowds and attention aren't your thing."

Carmilla smiled back. With all of these people in the room, and she makes sure Carmilla is okay. The sweetest thing that could be.

"Don't worry about me; I'm having an awesome ti-" 

"LAURA!" One of the children suddenly shouted, and crashed into her, coiling their arms around her legs. In a split moment Laura's drink was spilled all over Carmilla's shirt. Carmilla simply sighed, her drenched shirt now clinging to her body.

"Time. Having an awesome time." Yep, the world hated her. The world has always hated her; this is it. This was the final sign. _Thank you world for declaring such I am so very grateful for the friendly reminder._

"Oh, God Jakob!" Laura exclaimed with a laugh, and then she noticed the wet shirt. A look of pure horror dropped her expression, one Carmilla immediately wanted to fix. "Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry!" Laura placed her drink on a nearby table. Carmilla waved it off. She should be concerned with the fact she could very well murder a child because wow, this drink was cold.

"Honestly?" Carmilla said. "Don't worry about it. I just need to keep myself from snapping this kid's-"

"Enthusiasm! She was going to say enthusiasm! Snap your fingers if your enthusiastic!" Laura said with a nervous chuckle, shooting Carmilla a look. Carmilla bounced it right back; she's the one in the drenched shirt after all. "Okay Jakob why don't you go tell Perry all about your barbie collection!" Laura said, gesturing toward the curly ginger. 

"Yeah!" He exclaimed, and scurried off. Laura snatched Carmilla's wrist and quickly took her up the stairs, bringing her to her room. 

"Carmilla! You can't just threaten little kids!" Laura exclaimed, rushing to her closet once the door was secure and shut. 

"Well little kids can't just run up to people and make them spill their drinks." Carmilla grumbled. "Besides; you know I hate children."

Laura started scrounging through the drawers to the closet. Carmilla sighed, and plopped down on the edge of the bed. She tugged at her shirt, trying to get it from clinging to her body. _How cold was that drink, really?_ Carmilla thought to herself, her skin freezing from the liquid drenching the fabric. Carmilla, deciding this torture of being in a drenched chamber was enough, Carmilla attempted to take off her shirt. As though she truly belonged in some twisted comedy, it got stuck over her head. Carmilla sighed, and stood up, writhing in the shirt holding her head and arms captive.

_My god; this is terrible._

 

**Laura**

 

Laura picked out the only black shirt she had, hoping it would be to Carmilla's taste. 

"Here. I hope this-" Her words caught in her throat as she turned around, Carmilla's shirt stuck above her head, her arms tangled in the mess, her torso exposed. Laura's heart skipped into a pounding rhythm, beating harshly in her chest. A series of nerves shot straight through her, sending a shiver down her spine. Carmilla's skin had gotten paler somehow during the winter; the black bra against her skin making that apparent. Laura swallowed past the lump forming in her throat. Carmilla sighed heavily, her ribcage showing as it expanded for that moment, then relaxing back.

"Are you just gonna stand there or are you going to help me?" Carmilla said exasperatedly. Friends do that, right? She's just going to help her with her shirt- it's stuck. Help a friend in need. So what if she's a little turned on; it happens. "Cupcake?" Laura snapped out of her daze.

"Ah! Yes! Right! Helping!" Laura blinked furiously and set the shirt on her bed, and stopped before Carmilla. She grabbed the hem of the shirt tangled above in her arms, and pulled it off her head, blanket of her raven hair falling down. "There. You are..." She wish the fabric was still between them as they locked eyes, Carmilla's dark ones burning into hers. She remembers this; she's done this before. She's been in this exact, well, almost exact same position. Last time Carmilla was pinned against a fridge, and Laura had ripped off her hoodie... Laura's breath became ragged at the thought, remembering the way her lips tasted, the look of lust in her eyes, the way Carmilla's hands felt on her... Her heart started pounding in her chest as her stomach began twisting in knots. She jumped at the sound of loud laughter coming from downstairs, snapping out of her trance.

"Free." She stated. "You are free. Um," Laura turned and snatched the black shirt from her bed, "so this should-" As she turned her words were forgotten in Carmilla's lips, her hand caressing Laura's cheek. Laura lost herself for a moment, the lips she was so longing to taste for so long finally on hers. Laura wasn't sure where the shirt landed, but she knew it was no longer in her hand. 

Their lips met again; the deeper down this spiral she goes. Their tongues touch; and she finds the world slowly vanishing. Her hands reach out to Carmilla's hips, the smooth skin resting under her fingertips, cool as the weather outside, pushing her further down. Their lips meet in repetition now, slow, like they were testing this out again, each kiss lingering. She could have been swept away, lost in this dark path she was heading down. But theres a voice in the back of her mind, one replaying the scene in her head, reminding her of all the moments they've had before this, reminding her of what they decided. _T_ _his is **definitely** not what friends do._ Laura pulled back and stared into Carmilla's eyes for a moment. She can't do this if it's going to be another event they're going to ignore, if they're going to be friends, if this doesn't mean anything to Carmilla like it means to Laura.

Carmilla's dark eyes are wild, her breath hitched. Laura took a step back, breaking all contact as she seemed to realize what just happened. They had kissed- again. And it terrified her how much she wanted her lips on her own, to touch and know every inch of her body. Laura couldn't go through this. Not again. Laura smacked her lips together.

"Thats not... What friends do." Laura said, her words slow. She needed to go; she needed to get out of the close proximity, for if she doesn't she won't be able to stop herself. "Um, I'm gonna go back to the party." She took another step back, and eventually sped out the door, returning to the reunion with her heart beating mad, her breathing ragged, her body aching for her to continue what had started. 

She's going to have to pretend nothing happened again.

 

**Papa Hollis**

 

The reunion was a major success, to him at least. Everyone was smiling, laughing, and reminiscing over old times. Kirsch and Danny, and Lafontaine and Perry were still together- though that was no surprise to Mr. Hollis. The thing he couldn't help but notice however was how happier Laura seemed; especially when she was around Carmilla. He couldn't stop himself in wondering if they were girlfriends or not. The way she stared at her; he's seen that same glimmer in her eyes. He's seen it when Laura's won the biggest prize at the fair, when she got accepted to Silas University, when he gave her those diamond earrings for her birthday. He's seen that look a thousand times before, but never would he thought she'd ever look at a person that way, and she didn't seem to notice that Carmilla had that same glimmer in her eyes every time she looked at Laura. It was like they were playing a twisted ping pong; each time one turns their head the other stares in awe, and neither notice the look.

But... If they were together, she'd tell him, right? She told him everything; she always has. They've always been close. Even with the distance now, she makes sure to call at least 4 times a week, but he can't help but notice that every time she'd talk to him, Carmilla would be involved. Even when it sounded like she was mad at her, she still talked about her like she was some prized possession only seen once in a billion years. He sighed.

He didn't even know if Carmilla was gay too. Hell, he still can't even believe that somehow they ended up reunited, but he has to believe it's the best thing that has happened to Laura. She seems so much happier; so much lighter. He can't help but wonder if she brought Carmilla here to announce that they're in a relationship, because it certainly seems like they are. He doesn't want to pry. If they are, he'll be there for the day they announce it.

And if they aren't, he'll be there for the day they realize just how hopelessly they are in love with each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos!


	23. Could Have

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being back home is heavenly for some and hell for others. Luckily, they all have each other for support...  
> Maybe  
> Or maybe they might just screw it all up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I accidentally drank A LOT of caffeinated tea. (WHO THE HELL PUTS CAFFEINE IN TEA I THOT THIS SHIT WAS SUPPOSED 2 B CALMING?????? NAH SON LEVEL 5 CAFFEINE I WASN'T READY) and now I have a huge burst of energy and I just decided to power through and just edit the living hell out of this. I'm not sure if I edited it to a point where it was worse or better. There's probably a few mistakes.  
> Or a lot.  
> Or maybe none at all. Idk. I just... this isn't what I signed up for. I wanted a relaxing evening. But fkin... I called my friend who gave me the tea and I was like "KATIE WTF I LITERALLY CAN NOT SIT STILL WHAT DID U GIVE ME??"  
> and she was like:  
> "What? Did you drink the black box or the white box?"  
> "THE WHITE BOX KATIE. I DRANK THE FUKIN WHITE BOX." and then I heard her gasp and just whisper like:  
> "Oh no...." THEN SHE HUNG UP. I CHECKED THE BOX. U KNOW WHAT IT SAID??? I'LL TELL U WAT IT SAID.  
> CAFFEINATED LEVEL: 5  
> I DRANK 3 MUGS  
> 3 MUGS  
> LEVEL 5  
> I SCARCELY EVER DRINK CAFFEINE AND NOW IT'S INVADED MY BODY IN A POWERFUL FORCE AND I JUST  
> I JUST CANT  
> I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS CAUSE IM CERTAINLY ON A TRIP  
> 

**Laura**

 

Day six of being back home, day six of waking up in Carmilla's arms. It was such a peaceful feeling, and brought a serenity she's never known. As expected, the two pretended that kiss never happened; it was simply a phantom of a memory. Going into day six, however, Laura realizes just how screwed she actually is. It was almost comical, really. Well, it would be if she wasn't so absolutely fucked.

As the days had passed, she realizes how quickly she's catching feelings for Carmilla, but theres a wall; a barrier preventing from them to be together. She knows how to tear it down, but doesn't know how to find the courage to do so. Laura wonders what is going through Carmilla's mind, wonders what she's thinking, wonders if she still feels the same, and if she does if her feelings were getting progressively deeper like Laura's; if she had any at all, that is.

Laura turned around in her arms so she was facing her. She listened to her soft breathing, felt the slow rise and fall of her chest, traced her features with her eyes, her hardened exterior gone, like the weight of her past was never forgotten- even in sleep. Carmilla's skin always looked so smooth, and paler now that winter has come. Laura couldn't help herself as she reached her hand up, brushing her fingertips over Carmilla's cheek, down her jawline. Carmilla surprised Laura when she hummed, almost like she was purring. Laura smiled softly, and started tucking strands of Carmilla's hair behind her ear. When she felt her heart flutter she stopped herself; these feelings had to stop. 

Laura shook her head, and hopped off the bed. She can't be doing that; she can't be having these feelings. Laura stretched her arms above her head and sighed in a failed attempt to rid of the newfound heaviness to her heart.

"Babe... Come back to bed..." She heard Carmilla mumble. Laura's eyes widened in surprise. _Babe? Did she just call me babe?_ Laura looked to Carmilla over her shoulder. She was stilled, propped up on her elbow, eyes as wide as Laura's, hair draping down like a raven-colored curtain. Laura felt a heat rush to her cheeks, because god Carmilla looked great in that grey tank top. "Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"No. It's okay." Laura found herself saying, quicker than she would expect. They stared at each other for a moment, Laura's heart beat rising at a crescendo, thumping louder and louder in her chest. _That's not something friends do_. Laura forced herself to look away, gazing to the window where the sun reflected off the scene. She could imagine standing here, Carmilla standing behind her with her arms wrapped around her waist as they talked of- _no_. Laura shook off the thought as quick as it invaded her mind.

"Um, I'm gonna shower, if you don't mind." Laura said, though she rushed to her bathroom before she could hear her response.  _Holy Hufflepuff; this is getting terrible_. Laura thought to herself as she turned the shower head on.

She sees a _lot_ of cold showers in her future.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

Perfect. A nice, wonderful morning. A beautiful, rising sun. A nice, warm cup of coffee. And to top it all off, one big family fight.

Lafontaine sat in their living room, a full on brawl of harsh words passing back and forth between each family member. Apparently, aunt Janice doesn't like how 'close' Lafontaine and Perry are. Uncle Jack (bless his soul) says he doesn't like how aunt Janice is a close minded bitch. Lafontaine's dad doesn't like how his child's love life is anyone's business. Lafontaine's brother thinks Lafontaine is lucky to have Perry; in fact, he'd date her if Lafontaine wasn't. Lafontaine states how they don't appreciate that comment. Lafontaine's mother claims that Perry is an irresistible woman. Aunt Janice asks if Lafontaine's mother is becoming 'one of them lesbians' too. Uncle Frank claims that sexuality is bullshit and marriage should be between a man and a woman. Lafontaine's brother says he needs to shove his outdated ideas of marriage up his ass. Craziness ensues.

"They're my child! Their love life is none of your business, not any of you guys' business!" Lafontaine's father exclaims. They have learned from years of experience that the best thing they can do is just stay silent. If their family wants to defend them, then that's what their going to do. It seems whenever they talk, the fights just get worse. 

"She's my niece!" Aunt Janice exclaimed. Lafontaine cringed, their coffee nearly spilling from their mug. Just three little letters- that's all they are. Just three little letters. 

"Excuse me!" Lafontaine's brother, Larry, exclaims. "They are not a girl! Use they/them pronouns you evil bitch!"

"Okay. I agree Janice is a complete psycho but there is no need to call a lady a bitch!" Uncle Jack replies.

"Fine. A crazy cu-"

"Larry!" Lafontaine's mother cried out. 

"Mean person." Larry corrected sternly.

"What, are you one of them homosexuals too?" Uncle Frank, the friendly homophobic, exclaims.

"So what if I am? I'm not, but it wouldn't matter either way!" Larry shouted. Lafontaine sighed, and took a large sip of their coffee.

"Wonderful morning, isn't it?" They muttered to themselves as their dysfunctional family continued to fight. Lafontaine arose from the couch and stealthily sneaked out of the living room and into the kitchen. Their family never lets them fight their own battles, which in some cases, they love and appreciate. But sometimes, Lafontaine really just need to step in and do it themselves.

Lafontaine dumped the remnants of their coffee down the drain and gripped the counter. December 27th. December 27th they clear out of here and Lafontaine gets to spend the rest of the time with their immediate family. That's it- 6 more days. They can do that; just 6 more days. God, can they do 6 more days? They don't know how much of this misgendering they can take. It's draining; oh so mentally draining. They always think they're free, but then they'll go to a restaurant and the waiter or waitress will ask 'and what does the lady want?' Or they'll go to buy groceries and the cashier calls them 'ma'am'. They squeezed their eyes shut and draped their head. They wonder if they will ever be free from this; this weight on their shoulders. Why can't it just be universal to not assume people's genders? Why can't people just use they/them pronouns for everyone until they clarify if their a boy or girl or whatever- why did everyone have to be this way? Will they ever be free?

Suddenly their phone buzzed. They sighed, and pulled it out of the pocket of their shirt.

_**Perr <3:** Hey. Just reminding you that you are a wonderful PERSON and I love you so much! THEY THEY THEY THEY. (Also I will cut a bitch if you give me the word)_

Lafontaine grinned. But... There's moments like this. Moments where they remember there are people who accept them, who love them, who will rush to their defense when they need it, who will use their pronouns and spread the word so they don't have to. They typed back a quick response, somehow grinning whilst their family fought in the living room. They can get through this.

With her, they can get through anything.

 

**Kirsch**

 

Kirsch went to the courts mid-day, getting his ass whooped by Danny's expert basketball skills. It was nice to be back here; to reminisce in the old times they shared at these very courts.

"Hey Danny." Kirsch said, trying to swipe the ball. Danny did a cross over, making him nearly loose his footing.

"Yeah?" She replied, pushing past him and making the perfect layup. 

"Remember when," she tossed the basketball to him, "we were teens, and you told me how to correct my form?" He started dribbling, planning his way to the hoop. 

"Yep." Danny stayed low, a determined look in her electric blue eyes. 

"That was the reason we won finals." He said, pulling a wraparound. Danny proved to be quick, nearly swiping the ball from him and blocking his way to the hoop.

"Yeah. I know. I watched that game."

Kirsch made an attempt to reach the basket but Danny blocked him. He pivoted around her, almost making the layup, but she spiked the ball back down. Kirsch picked it back up, dribbling again.

"I just thought I'd admit that out loud." Kirsch took a few steps back to eye the court, making another approach in his head.

"Is there anything else you'd like to admit out loud?" Danny challenged, making another swipe for the ball. That's his cue. Kirsch pulled a double-crossover, dodging her attack and making a perfect line for the hoop. He landed a flawless layup; falling into the basket in the most satisfying way possible.

"I just kicked your ass there."

"Sure ya did."

Kirsch passed the ball to Danny and shuffled before her, waiting for her to make a move. 

"I made the layup, didn't I?" He challenged, shuffling to block her way to the basket.

"I'm still winning 12-32; only 2 points to go and I win."

"I could make a comeback." 

It was a mockery to his words as she dared a 3-pointer, landing it perfectly. Danny dusted off her hands together victoriously, a triumphant smirk on her lips.

"I won. Not only that, I won with an extra point to spare." Danny said, placing her hands on her hips. Kirsch rolled his eyes all the way around the world, though he couldn't argue. She did just kick his ass. "So," she said, "what else haven't you admitted?" Kirsch grinned.

"You have yet to admit something." Kirsch retorted as he retrieved the basketball.

"Uh, no I don't." 

Kirsch's grin only widened. He started mindlessly dribbling the basketball to himself, pulling off moves.

"Yes you do." He passed the basketball to her, confusion clear on her face. "You still haven't admitted you were the one that kissed me." He watched as her expression contorted into a determined scowl. She peered at him.

"That's because I wasn't."

"Yes you were." Kirsch ebbed on. "I remember it as clear as day. We were in Laura's yard, playing hide and go seek tag," he dared a few steps closer to his girlfriend, watching as she slowly turned fearful. This was something she has never admitted, something she has always said Kirsch did. Kirsch may have been the one to ask her out, but she was the one that kissed him, "and you kissed me." Danny passed the basketball to him harshly, earning an 'oof'.

"No I didn't. I may have kissed you when you asked me out, but I wasn't the one that did the very first time." Danny denied, picking up her sweatshirt from the nearby bench and slipping it on. 

"Yes you did! You totally did."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"Did. Not."

"Did. Too."

Danny glared at him. She crossed her arms, brows knit in a scowl. He kept his grin, resting the basketball between his forearm and hip.

"If we're going to get married one day, I'd rather you admit this." Kirsch teased. Danny glared at him for a few more moments, seeming to contemplate it.

"Fine." Danny grumbled. Kirsch nearly squealed, but for the sake of his bro-hood, he instead cleared his throat, waiting for the confession. "Iwastheonethatkissedyou." She mouthed, too quick for Kirsch to even decipher if she actually admitted it or not.

"What?"

"Oh come on. I..." Danny sighed. "I... Was the one that kissed you." Kirsch grinned, and tossed an arm around her shoulders.

"Thank you."

"Ew your sweaty arm get off of me." She said, though a small smile still played on her lips. Kirsch laughed and unraveled his arm. 

That's one step closer.

Abruptly, his phone buzzed. Kirsch held up his hand to ask for a moment, but Danny's phone buzzed too. They gave each other puzzled looks before pulling out their phones.

 

**Group Chat: Kirsch's Future Wife, Carmilla, Laura the Midget, Perry, Kirsch, Lafonbrains (6 Members)**

_**Perry:** Hey guys! How are your families?_

_**Kirsch:** The best_

_**Kirsch's Future Wife:** Meh_

_**Laura the Midget:** Hey Perry! He's lovely!_

_**Lafonbrains:** Hell on Earth_

_**Perry:** Glad to hear that!_  
_**Perry:** Oh_  
_**Perry:** I mean, minus the Hell on Earth one._  
_**Perry:** Well, if you want to escape I was thinking we could all hang out at the mall. You know, for old times sake. _

_**Kirsch:** Yeah!!! I'd love that!_

_**Lafonbrains:** Let's do it_

_**Kirsch's Future Wife:** Sure. _

_**Laura the Midget:** Hell ya! Carmilla said she'd go too._

_**Carmilla:** I did not. _

_**Laura the Midget:** You're going._

_**Carmilla:** Fine._

_**Kirsch's Future Wife:** Looks like somebody's whipped..._

_**Lafonbrains:** *whip noises*_

_**Carmilla:** Ha ha. Super funny guys._

_**Perry:** Anyways.  
**Perry:** Great! How about we go at 6PM?_

_**Laura the Midget:** Sounds good._

_**Carmilla:** Only because Frodo is making me_

_**Laura the Midget:** I'm not that short..._

_**Lafonbrains:** I'm down_

_**Kirsch's Future Wife:** Of course_

_**Kirsch:** Yeah!!!_

_**Perry:** Cool. See everyone there :)_

 

Kirsch slipped his phone back into his pocket.

"If we go now, we can shower." Danny said, tossing Kirsch his jacket.

"Wait. Are you forgetting that you have to drive me home?" Kirsch said. There was a good 10 minutes between Danny and his home. He's fine without showering- he just needs to put on a lot of deodorant.

"I was thinking we... Shower together." She said, quirking an eyebrow. Kirsch grinned.

"Oh. I'm definitely down."

She smiled.

 

**Carmilla**

 

 _Why must I always let myself get dragged into these sorts of things?_ Carmilla thought as Laura pulled into the parking lot of the mall. Carmilla remained in the car as Laura unbuckled herself and hopped out. If Laura didn't look so adorable, Carmilla was sure she wouldn't be here.

Laura wore a thin white beanie, a white christmas sweater with black diamonds all over them, and skinny teal blue jeans. Meanwhile, Carmilla sported purple jeans, combat boots, and some light black sweater, courtesy of Laura. She looked like she was going to rob this mall- which she would. From what she remembered as a child, this was the shittiest mall to ever exist. It looked so different now; the lights outside actually worked, the letters above listing the town's mall actually shining and not flickering- and there actually was a label. The entrance was different too; two glass, double doors, and it looked like they actually had a handicap button. The mall was bigger as well from what she remembered. It was cleaner from what it looked like too, seeming to be more elegant somehow.

Suddenly her side of the passenger door opened. There stood Laura with a smirk, one hand on the door and the other on her hip. _They were right; I am whipped._

"Are you coming?" Laura questioned. Why was so cute when she tried to play interrogation? Carmilla's lips quirked into a smile.

"This is stupid." Carmilla muttered.

"Come on. They're waiting." 

Carmilla sighed. It's true; Carmilla made them leave at 6 o'clock exactly, saying she didn't want to be the first ones there.

"I don't wanna." 

"You are a child." Laura reached over and unbuckled Carmilla's seatbelt, the close proximity sending her heart to race. Laura lingered for a moment longer, her honey brown eyes gazing into Carmilla's. How was she always so beautiful? It seemed no matter what she did, what she wore, what she was doing she always- "Well, let's go." Was persistent. She was always persistent. Carmilla sighed, and hopped out of the car, much to Laura's amusement. Laura shut the car door and linked their arms together. Feelings- she doesn't have any for Carmilla. _That's... Not what friends do._ The words echoed in her head, shooting a pang of guilt to her heart.

She didn't mean to kiss Laura, she doesn't even know why she did; it was uncontrollable. As soon as their eyes had locked when Laura tore her shirt off, Carmilla could only think about kissing Laura, and once she did it was heaven on earth. But why would Laura kiss her back only to say that? You don't kiss someone, say that, and walk away, right? And worst of all, that too was being swept under the rug. _Not what friends do... There's a lot that we've done that's not what friends do._ Carmilla peeked at Laura out of the corner of her eye. 

_What's going through her mind?_

 

**Lafontaine**

 

"Finally! They arrive!" Lafontaine exclaimed as Laura and Carmilla appeared, arm in arm. Laura sported a wide smile, Carmilla trying to stifle her own and look like a grump.

"We did! Woohoo!" Laura proclaimed, taking Carmilla's hand and holding it in the air. Carmilla rolled her eyes, but Lafontaine didn't miss the smile that broke through. 

"So where are we going first?" Laura asked once she stood before the four. 

"Uh, why don't we go for some grub?" Kirsch offered.

"Some grub?" Danny replied in disbelief. He grinned.

"Yeah. Some grub." She rolled her eyes.

"God, I'm getting married to a moron." Danny's expression dropped. A rush of gasps and surprised faces washed over the vicinity of the six. 

"You're getting married?"

"What!" 

"When?"

"Did you propose?"

"Where's the ring?"

"I never thought Xena could actually get married to someone."

"How did this happen?"

"Whoa whoa." Kirsch said, calming the burst of questions. "We're not getting married per say." Confused expressions followed, Lafontaine completely stunned and surprised.

"We just... Know we are. One day." Danny corrected. Silent 'oh's were next to come. 

"Jesus Danny. You can't just drop something like that." Lafontaine said. "Anyway, let's grab that grub." 

 

**Carmilla**

 

Now seated with the five, Carmilla was starting to think this wasn't so bad. A night out with her friends; thats not something they did often. Additionally, she's gotten to see the changes this place has gone through. What used to be a small, dingy mall was now a large, flourishing one. It too had the plague known as "Christmas Spirit"; a large Christmas tree in the center, fake reindeer hanging from the ceiling, Christmas lights everywhere, decorations hanging on every store's window. Even the napkins in the center of the table in this restaurant were Christmas themed- it was honestly disgusting.

"Hey Carm." Laura said, making Carmilla's heart jump. "Do you like Christmas?" Carmilla smirked, and shook her head.

"No. Not really." Carmilla replied. "But then again, I never-

"Hey!" Said a cool voice. Carmilla turned her head to see a brunette standing there- the waitress, a pen in one hand and a notepad in the other. "Can I get your orders?" The crew ordered a different array of beverages, though the whole time it was clear that the waitress was gawking at Carmilla. Carmilla didn't miss how Laura's fists were clenched, but Carmilla convinced herself she must be bothered over something else. She knows Laura doesn't have any feelings for her, just how she knows she only wants to be friends. She was the one that broke the kiss... _Thats not...  What friends do._ The words echoed in her head, inspiring a pang of guilt.

"Whoa. Heart eyes much?" Kirsch said as soon as the girl was out of earshot.

"What?" Carmilla replied.

"Oh come on, Karnstein. You had to have seen the heart eyes she was making at you." Danny said. Carmilla propped her elbow up on the table and rested her head on her chin, eyes trained on the waitress as she moved about the booths and tables. She was cute; Carmilla will give her that. She had a nose ring and a few tattoos, her brunette hair tied up in some loose ponytail/bun, her eyes an electric blue. 

"You think?" Carmilla said, looking back to the two.

"Yeah!" Kirsch and Danny said in unison. 

"Yeah Carmilla. Total heart eyes." Perry added, her hand intertwined with Lafontaine's.

"Complete." Lafontaine commented. Carmilla remembered how this went last time, how it seemed so long ago. Sitting with Laura in Tuesday's, getting kicked and chastised for her actions. Why doesn't she care now? Well, she knows why; she doesn't have feelings for her anymore the way Carmilla does for her. It seemed so far away, like something seen underwater from a great distance. It was so long ago when they reconnected, when they sat at that very diner they have lunch at, when Laura still had feelings for Carmilla, when she still cared.

"Of course she's interested in you. You're like a supermodel." Laura grumbled. Carmilla's gaze snapped back to Laura. Her arms were folded, brows knit into an irritated scowl. The group shared confused, yet worried looks. Why say that so angrily? It didn't sound like she meant it as a compliment. If her words were different it would have been an insult. Carmilla sighed. Even then, even if she has no right, Carmilla still cared for the cupcake, and hated to see her in such a mood. Putting her dignity aside, Carmilla grabbed a festive napkin that looked like Christmas had puked all over it, and started to fold it into an origami figure JP had taught her. 

"Did you guys see her name?" Carmilla asked, her fingers working with the napkin.

"Brandy, I think." Kirsch said. "Or wait... Was it Mandy? Candy? Oh man I could go for some candy. You know, it's Christmas. They have so much candy during Christmas. It's the best. Candy canes, cookies, peppermints..." Carmilla tuned Kirsch's little rant out, instead focusing completely on the origami figure. He talked on and on about something of the holiday which, if you celebrate it, would be found whimsical. With a roll to her eyes at her own softness she had for only Laura, she made the origami deer.

"Hey." Carmilla murmured discreetly, catching Laura's attention. "Here." She slid the deer to Laura, peeking at her out of her peripheral to pretend she was still tuned into whatever discussion was happening. Her heart fluttered as a smile spread across Laura's cheeks, her eyes brightening. 

"Why'd you make this?" Laura asked, carefully taking the deer. Carmilla shrugged.

"You looked a little... Disgruntled. Additionally, it's the holidays- _you_  of all people shouldn't be disgruntled."

Laura gave Carmilla a pointed look though she was smiling.

"Aren't you disgruntled during the holidays?" Laura retorted. Carmilla couldn't help but smile.

"Yeah. But," Carmilla shrugged, "it's my thing. I hate the holidays. You, on the other hand..."

Laura cocked an eyebrow.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Carmilla snickered.

"Cupcake. You literally dragged me into a creepy suicide cult building all for the sake of Halloween."

Laura seemed to take in her words.

"That... Is true."

Carmilla smiled wide, and drummed her fingers against her cheek. She could stare at her all day; especially with how cute she looks. The beanie suited her well, so did the sweater, and the jeans, and her flats... Carmilla couldn't help but let her eyes roam over every aspect of the girl, her bright smile, her gentle stare. How could one girl be so-

"Hey. Hey." Kirsch said, snapping in front of Carmilla's face. Carmilla blinked out of her daze and looked back to Kirsch. "I said do you like candy?" She needed to prove she wasn't in such an awe-stricken daze.

"The waitress? Of course. She's super pretty and-"

"I'm what?" _Oh great Karnstein_. The waitress stood next to the table, a tray of cold drinks resting on her hand and shoulder, a pleased smile dancing across her lips. Carmilla smiled awkwardly, making sure to check the name tag. Brandy- that's her name. 

"Hello." Carmilla said, not really knowing what to say. Brandy snickered as she started to set the drinks down.

"Hey."

"You are Brandy." Carmilla folded her hands on the table. The waitress laughed, and it had to almost be the cutest laugh she ever heard. Carmilla peeked at Laura for a moment, the scowl back. _Almost._

"I am. And you are..." 

"That's Carmilla." Lafontaine said, sticking their hand out. "Hi. I'm her friend- and a much better conversationalist. Also non-binary so please be okay with that." Brandy laughed her almost-as-sweet-as-Laura's laugh and shook their hand.

"Of course I am." She replied. She's cool with Lafontaine's pronouns- that's more of a reason to like her. _Decent human being? Check._

"This is Perry, Kirsch, Danny, Laura, and Carmilla." Lafontaine announced, pointing to each member. Brandy waved, and Carmilla could already tell she was outgoing.

"Hey y'all. I'm Brandy." She spoke, though her eyes stayed on Carmilla for a moment longer. She set up the menus and placed their drinks, taking Carmilla by surprise as she practically shoved her cleavage in her face. What happened to Carmilla? Months ago she'd be flirting relentlessly; she'd have this girl screaming her name after the first minutes she knew she was interested. Now, she finds, she's not even flirting; not even _attempting_ to make seduction eyes. And for some reason, Carmilla looked to Laura apologetically. Even after some girl practically shoved her cleavage in her face, she still wants Laura to know somehow that she has feelings. But when Laura simply stared out the window to the restaurant, Carmilla felt hurt. _She doesn't have feelings for you, lackwit._ Carmilla cursed herself and looked down at the table for a moment.

"I'll be back in 5 minutes to take your orders." Brandy said, daintily walking away.

"Carmilla. If you don't take this up your an idiot." Danny proclaimed.

"Huh?" Carmilla replied, still deep in her thoughts of Laura. Danny picked up Carmilla's drink and flipped the napkin over, revealing a message neatly written in black ink. 

 

**_Meet me in the bathroom after you've ordered ;)_ **

 

Carmilla quickly flipped the napkin back around and forced the drink down, her eyes darting around the room only to land on Brandy. She shot Carmilla a wink before speaking to some table.

"Oh shit." Carmilla muttered.

"What did it say?" Kirsch asked. Carmilla knew Laura was listening; she could see her out of the corner of her eye, her head slightly turned. Carmilla shook her head, not wanting to reveal the knowledge to the girl.

"Nothing."

"Carmilla's gettin' some." Danny then said. If Carmilla didn't know any better she would have kicked Danny in the legs. Carmilla saw Laura's head drape, her hands folded on her lab, twiddling with her thumbs.

"I'm-" Carmilla quieted her voice. "I'm not _gettin' some_. I'm just going to pretend I didn't read the message, and order." Carmilla said.

"Wait- what do you mean?" Lafontaine chimed in.

"I'm going to pretend I never saw the message written on this. She didn't see me read it; I can still pretend I never saw the message." Carmilla murmured. To cut the conversation short, she opened her menu. 

"Oh, why not Carmilla?" Perry asked, everyone following Carmilla's lead in opening their menus. _Because the girl I want is sitting right next to me._ Carmilla could have said it, she really could have, admitted all of her feelings just then. But instead, she bit back the words and swallowed her feelings.

"Because. I am classier than that." She took a sip of her drink to prevent herself from speaking further.

"Pfft. Classy." Laura scoffed. 

"Is that a problem?" Carmilla questioned, her eyebrows raising in surprise. Laura picked at the leather on her menu, and slowly shook her head.

"Nope. Not at all. Just an observation." She said, though her eyes never met Carmilla. They stared at the menu, though they didn't read the lines. She was staring into space; her mind somewhere, but where? Carmilla chewed on her bottom lip.

"Are you upset?" Carmilla decided to ask.

"Upset? Why would I be upset? Because of Brandy?" Laura suddenly snapped. Okay- that definitely was not expected. The words were delivered so harshly that Carmilla leaned back a bit. "Don't think that I'm jealous, Carmilla. Not everyone wants you like _that_." And suddenly, a thousand arrows shot through her heart with the bite to Laura's words. Carmilla's face contorted. Laura said that without a blink of an eye, without a care, but her words were harsh and made to hurt her.

"I... I never said-"

"Whatever. Not like it'll mean anything to you anyway." A thousand more in her heart. Does she think what happened between them didn't matter to her? Of course it mattered. Did it matter to Laura? Carmilla forced her gaze to fixate on the menu, trying to read the lines. Was she looking too hard into things? Carmilla blinked rapidly, her heart aching.

"Not that you matter to me." And there it was, the final attack, the final wound to her bleeding heart that pushed her into a hurt she's never known. Carmilla was right; Laura doesn't have feelings for her. Not even- she doesn't even matter to her. And here Carmilla was, pining over her, dreaming of her, wanting her. Carmilla could sense the tension in the group, but she was too wounded to care.

Brandy to returned with a bounce to her step, though the table was anything but chipper. Carmilla's heart felt heavy, she almost couldn't breathe. What was this? Was she... Sad? Was she going to cry? Carmilla wasn't sure what she felt, but there were only a few ways she knew how to deal with her problems:

Read, get drunk, and/or have sex. 

Apparently everyone had said their orders, because the spotlight was now on Carmilla. Her hands still gripped tightly on the menu, the words printed on it never reaching her mind.

"Did you get my note?" She heard Brandy whisper. Carmilla found herself shaking her head, choosing the first thing her eyes landed on. She blurted it out and closed her menu, Brandy taking it soon after. She then grabbed the note and showed it to Carmilla. Carmilla knew Laura was reading it, but her heart was so heavy it didn't have the capacity to care for what she thinks. "So shall we go?" Brandy murmured in her ear. Carmilla eyed Laura for a moment. She doesn't care; she doesn't matter to Laura- they're not even together.

Carmilla smiled, and looked back to Brandy.

"Sure. I'll meet you in there." Her feet felt heavy as she rose out of the booth and forced her way to the bathroom stalls. 

This wasn't right, but Carmilla didn't care.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura sat completely stunned. Carmilla did that. She really just did that. Laura thought they were a thing; that they had _something_. No, no she was the one that said Carmilla didn't matter. But Carmilla was the one who said they should be friends. No... Carmilla was the one that kissed her even though she said they'd only be friends. What angered her next was the fact that everyone had encouraged her to go after Brandy, though they all know her feelings towards Carmilla.

"You guys!" Laura exclaimed, though all eyes were already on her.

"Sorry. I thought that she'd admit that... Or realize that..." Lafontaine stammered over their words, trampling like they lost their footing.

"Thought what? That Carmilla actually had feelings for me? I already told you; she doesn't." Laura snapped. The table stayed silent, all wearing guilty expressions and sorrowful faces. She scoffed, and shook her head. "Someone else keep her for the night. I'm going home." Laura tossed the figurine Carmilla made her in the trash and rushed out of the booth. She knows this isn't their faults, that it's her own, that it's Carmilla's choice. Laura was the one who said she didn't matter, but Carmilla was the one that acted like Laura didn't matter. 

Guess she knows where she stands now.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla rubbed her hands down her thighs. It's been a while- a long while since she's done this kind of thing. Too long. Since Laura came back into her life, Carmilla realized, she hasn't hooked up with someone; she hasn't even had sex. God, what is this girl doing to her? Was it even Laura that made her this way? Well, of course it was. She's so wrapped around this girl's finger, and she doesn't even _matter_ to her. What was wrong with Carmilla? What was wrong with Laura? Why the sudden change in mood? If all this time she didn't matter, then why did she-

Carmilla snapped her gaze to the door as the handle turned, increasing her nerves.

Brandy waltzed in and locked the door behind her, a grin on her face. Her waitress apron was gone, replaced by a long-sleeved black button up shirt with black jeans. Carmilla wasn't sure how long she stared at the girl, but she was certainly surprised how out-of-character Carmilla was acting. Normally, she wouldn't waste a moment when she were about to hook up with someone. She would already have her pinned against the wall with her lips attached to the girl's. There was something holding her back.

"I only got about 15 minutes so I'd rather not waist time." Brandy informed. Carmilla nodded. It's been so long since she's done this type of thing that she almost forgot how to actually begin- or to even begin.

"Right." Carmilla grabbed Brandy's hips, and with a tug crashed their bodies together. She moved her hands to Brandy's back as Brandy's cupped Carmilla's face, their lips meeting in a tango. It felt different somehow. Her heart didn't beat but it ached, her lips weren't eager but hesitant. She wasn't as turned on as she should have been, instead she just felt the heaviness of guilt. Why didn't this feel right? She must be doing something wrong. There has to be something she could do.

Carmilla gripped the bottoms Brandy's thighs and picked her up, carrying her then plopping her on top of the sink, trying desperately to feel something from the encounter as Brandy's legs wrapped around her waist. That should have worked, right? Brandy was a cute girl; a cute girl that she was making out with- who, wow, was an _amazing_ kisser.. What was wrong with her? Why couldn't she get into this? _Not that you matter to me..._ Carmilla gripped Brandy's shirt at the words, echoing through her head. _Screw her. Is she the reason?_ Brandy trailed her lips to Carmilla's neck. She has to be the reason; but she shouldn't be. She doesn't care about Carmilla. She doesn't. But when Brandy started to unbutton Carmilla's pants, Carmilla stopped her.

"Wait, wait." Carmilla said breathlessly. Brandy instantly pulled her hands back and broke away from her neck.

"What?" Brandy asked.

"I can't go through with this." Carmilla admitted, resting her hands on top of the waitress' thighs. Brandy simply sighed, an exaggerated rise and fall to her shoulders.

"It's because of her, isn't it?"

"What? Because of wh-"

"Laura."

Carmilla's words stopped dead in her tracks. Even the sound of her name had more of an affect on her than this encounter. Carmilla nodded slowly. 

"Yeah." She murmured, taking a step back, re-doing her pants. "I'm sorry. I really am. I just-" Brandy shook her head.

"No. Don't worry about it. I could tell." 

Carmilla cocked her head to the side.

"You could?" Has it always been that obvious? Brandy nodded.

"Oh yeah." She said, hopping off the sink. "No matter how much I flirted with you, your eyes always found their way back to her." Brandy pulled a pen from her hair and yanked out a small slit of paper.

"Oh." Carmilla murmured, as Brandy scribbled something on a piece of paper.

"If you ever change your mind," she said, placing the paper into Carmilla's hand, "give me a call. Until then, I hope you figure it out." Brandy moved to the door, leaving Carmilla stunned. She held the paper in her hand, reading the nice handwriting in black ink, listing her number with the words: _Brandy. Give me a call._ Next to it. 

Carmilla sighed, and slipped the paper into her purple pants.

Why couldn't she fall for someone like that? Someone she actually has a chance with?

Carmilla waltzed out of the bathroom and to her table, but she noticed they were missing a member; Laura. Her heart sank to the pit of her stomach. Oh no- oh no no no. She's mad- she's definitely mad at Carmilla. And if they were occupying the bathroom, that means she left. Judging by the guilt expressions everyone wore, she's guessing she left- and angry too. 

Carmilla sighed, and plopped down in the booth. Silence hung over them, suffocatingly so. She knows that one of them is going to have to drive her home in one hella awkward drive. Better yet, she'll probably have to stay at their house.

_Wonderful._

 

**Kirsch**

 

Having Carmilla stay at his home wasn't exactly what he had in mind when he arrived the journey back. Though, he didn't expect Carmilla to go and have sex with some girl in a bathroom either. He didn't expect Laura to admit her feelings like that. And he certainly didn't expect Carmilla to shut down once she learned Laura had left, though no one was surprised she had.

"Um, uh. You can take my bed. I'll just grab the blow-up mattress." He said rather awkwardly. Kirsch and Carmilla were friends, sure. But they weren't that close; not 'temporary sleepover' close. He grabbed a blow-up mattress from his confused mother's closet. She questioned why she was sleeping over, saying she thought that he was 'with Danny'. He briefly explained that Carmilla is a lesbian, he's still together with Danny (duh), but Carmilla's in a fight with Laura and rushed back to his room, seeing Carmilla already make a home there, a book in hand.

If you didn't know Carmilla, you'd think that she was perfectly fine. But there was one thing that always gave clue that she wasn't; the eyebrows. They were always the indicators to her mood. They gave it away like a beacon at night. Knowing her for so long, then reconnecting all these months, Kirsch realized that they were the window to her emotions. As he configured the buttons and had the mattress blow up on it's own accord, he wondered if he should talk to Carmilla, ask her what's going on, try and make her feel better somehow. He wanted to, and if she's going to be temporarily sleeping in his house, shouldn't he at least try?

In an attempt to gather her attention, Kirsch cleared his throat, but to no avail. He did it again, only each grunt more emphasized. Carmilla sighed, and flopped the book down onto her chest.

"You need something beefcake?" She said, her voice raspier than usual.

"I, just uh... You doin' alright?"

"No I'm doing Brandy." She teased, though all humor in her voice was gone. It was dull, like her soul had sucked out of her. (Did Brandy suck her soul out of her?) Kirsch shook his head. (He's pretty sure that's not how lesbian sex works).

"I can't believe you did it so quick." He said in disbelief. Honestly; she was only gone for about 2 minutes. It was astonishing really.

"That's because I didn't do it, you dimwit." 

Kirsch's jaw dropped.

"What!" He exclaimed. "But you... And the..." 

"My god you can be thick. How do you think lesbian sex works?" Carmilla said.

"Um, I wouldn't know; I've never partaken in lesbian sex."

She shrugged.

"Touché." Carmilla sighed, and sat up a bit more, closing her book and resting it on her lap. "So it works by-"

"Eugh! No! I don't want to hear about it!" Kirsch exclaimed. Carmilla laughed and placed her book on the bedside table.

"I think you're the only guy who isn't interested in lesbian sex."

"Well, I'm a heterosexual male. There is no need for me to be. I'm not down with that over-sexualization of lesbians; it's damaging."

Carmilla seemed stunned for a moment. Truth was, growing up with Laura, he always heard her talk of this. He listened to her feminist rants, her speeches of equality- he's heard all of it. And since he's not a woman nor a lesbian, he doesn't argue- that's not his place. Instead, he knows she speaks of the truth, and agrees to it. Laura's right about a lot of things; and Kirsch has grown from knowing so.

"Wow. Color me impressed." 

Kirsch shrugged.

"When you grow up with a lesbian feminist, you kinda get a better understanding of what it's like." Kirsch said, not sure if he was allowed to say her name yet. But Carmilla chuckled, which was a good sign. That's the first smile he's seen since they left the mall.

The blow-up mattress finally inflated and Kirsch switched it off, grabbing a cover he brought from his mother's room and tucking it around it.

"Need help with that?" Carmilla offered.

"No no. I got it." He tucked the final corner and neatly placed a blanket on top of it. "Though, a couple pillows would be rad." He added as an afterthought. 

"You got it beefcake." Carmilla said, before two pillows hit his side. He shot her a quick thank you before placing them on the mattress, forming his temporary bed. Kirsch laid down on top of it, adjusting into a comfortable position though his feet hung off the edge. "So what's going on with you and Danny?" Carmilla asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Are you guys getting married or what?"

Kirsch grinned, and tucked his hands behind his head.

"Yeah, but she wants to after college. All I know is I'm going to make the proposal epic. Like, she's going to be in tears."

"Sounds violent."

"Not bad tears!" He corrected, oblivious to the fact that she was kidding. "Good ones; happy tears. She'll be all smileys, and I'll be all smileys. I have to make my speech perfect, too."

"Do you even know how you're going to propose?"

Kirsch paused. He actually doesn't; he just knows it's going to be insane and wild.

"Not really." 

Carmilla chuckled.

"If you put as much thought as you did into this at school you just might get better grades." Carmilla teased. Kirsch rolled his eyes.

"Ha ha. Very funny." Kirsch retorted. Carmilla snickered lightly. 

"I'm kidding, beefcake. In fact, I'm surprised you aren't making fun of me." Kirsch cocked an eyebrow.

"Why would I be?"

"Completely fucked up my chances with Laura. Almost slept with a girl. Ring any bells?" 

"Wait." Kirsch said, his mind reeling. "What do you mean you fucked up with Laura?" Kirsch sat up and peeked at Carmilla from the end of the bed to see that she was completely still. _Was that... Does that mean..._ Kirsch slowly started to connect the dots in his head. Wait a second. Carmilla looking at Laura every three seconds, Carmilla making Laura that little figurine when she was upset, Carmilla doing all these things she clearly hates for Laura, Carmilla upset because Laura kicked her out, Carmilla and Laura GRINDING at Halloween, Carmilla and Laura always escaping off, the lingering eye contact and the automatic smiles. _Oh my god_. A lightbulb flashed inside his mind, and if it was possible a ding went along with it.

"You have feelings for her!" Kirsch exclaimed, hopping out of the mattress only to bang his head on the wall. "Ow!" He exclaimed, rubbing the sore spot on the back of his head.

"Sh!" Carmilla hushed harshly. "Not so fucking loud!" Kirsch covered his hand over his mouth.

"Oh my god." He said, letting his hand slowly fall to his chin. "You totally do! How did I not see this before?"

"Because you're a lackwit who needs to practice volume control!" Carmilla shot back. "Look, just... They're not returned. Laura has made that perfectly clear." Carmilla said exasperatedly. Kirsch stared back in disbelief.

"Perfectly clear? Carmilla, she said to us 'you know how I feel about Carmilla' as soon as you went to... Not have sex with the waitress."

Carmilla sighed and shook her head.

"You heard her. She said it herself; I don't matter to her."

"You think she meant that?" Kirsch retorted. Carmilla seemed taken aback. "If some hot waiter flirted with Danny, and Danny took off with them I'd probably say something childish too." Kirsch replied. He could tell Carmilla was trying to shrug this off; he's just going to have to convince her.

"That's different; you guys are together."

"It's the same in the sense that I have feelings for Danny." Kirsch said, and he knew he captured her then. "How would you feel if a waitress came onto Laura the way Brandy did to you?" There it was- the final piece to looping her back in. Knowing that Carmilla feels the same for Laura, he can't sit around. Clearly, they've both done a terrible job at trying to get together. Carmilla looked stunned for a moment, as if she was physically putting herself in the place of Laura. They both know Laura could be childish sometimes, in ways like she acted tonight. But Carmilla could be, too. Kirsch knew that; he wasn't the idiot he always acted like he was. It was time for these two to girl the hell up and get together.

"You got me there..." Carmilla muttered. Kirsch grinned, when suddenly an idea struck. 

"Oh oh! I know I know I know!" He exclaimed, rushing to the window above his bedside table, whipping out his phone as well. This is what they did when they grew up, whenever he got into a fight with Laura or one of them needed to apologize.

"Jesus beefcake! We really need to have a talk about volume control." 

Kirsch shook his head and shot Laura text.

"No time." He grabbed Carmilla's arm and yanked her up to the window.

"What are you-" 

Kirsch held the phone to Carmilla's ear and she automatically held it in her hand, still clearly confsued. He could tell she was going to murder him if she didn't find out soon what exactly he was doing, but as soon as he heard Laura answer and she appeared at her window, it seems all of her violent intentions faded away. Kirsch quickly stepped out of the room and closed the door to give them privacy. He leaned back against the door, banging his head back against it.

_Let's just hope this works._

 

**Laura**

 

Laura wore the same stunned expression as Carmilla when she saw Carmilla at the window and not Kirsch, though from what she could tell it was his phone was in her hand. Living next to each other, whenever Kirsch and Laura got into some argument this was how they would make up; talking to each other on the phone and sometimes shouting through their windows. She didn't sign up for this; she expected Kirsch- not the girl she was completely falling for who totally ripped her heart out of her chest hours ago.

"I, um..." Laura nearly cringed as Carmilla spoke. "I didn't... This was Kirsch's-"

"Idea? I know. I could tell because you're calling from his phone." Laura said with a bit of a bite. It was silent for a moment, the background buzz of the restless bugs being the only sound between them. _So she ended up staying at Kirsch's._ Laura thought to herself. Even with the distance, Laura could see the way Carmilla swallowed nervously; her Adam's apple has always been clear.

"Um... Me and Brandy..."

Laura closed her eyes.

"I don't want the details." She said through clenched teeth. She regrets what she said back there, regrets ever having feelings for Carmilla, regrets flipping out and certainly regrets kicking Carmilla out. But even with that, she can't stand to hear what happened.

"No, no. We didn't do anything."

Laura's eyes shot open. 

"What?" She murmured.

"Yeah. We, uh. Well, we kissed but I... Well I stopped it." Carmilla said, her voice quiet on the other line. Laura could see, even with the distance, that she meant it. There's always some shade that falls in her eyes, proving that she's telling the truth. But there was something else behind them that she was too far away to see, almost a pleading look.

"It's not my business what you do." Laura murmured, trying to hide how pleased she was with the news. But, it wasn't; it really wasn't. Laura was the one that stopped Carmilla when they kissed, she was the one that lied and said Carmilla didn't matter to her. She sighed- she needs to fix that. "And, um... I didn't mean, what I said in there."

"I know. I didn't mean to ditch you guys like that."

"I know." More silence followed for a couple of moments before Laura sighed. "How do we keep fucking up?" Carmilla shrugged.

"Because it's us." Carmilla replied as though it were the simplest form of an answer. "But, otherwise, I'd say we work pretty damn well together." Laura couldn't stop the slow grin forming on her cheeks. "So... Am I allowed back in the Hollis home?"

"Please. I love my dad, but dealing with him alone is a bit overwhelming." 

Carmilla chuckled, shaking her head to herself.

"Will do, cupcake. See you in 5."

"Yeah." Laura hung up her phone with a wide smile. They stared at each other a moment longer before shutting their windows. As Laura went downstairs to unlock her front door, she couldn't help but wonder;

_Did she stop it for me?_

 

**Danny**

 

It was 10 minutes ago that he sent that damned text, so where the hell was he? Danny sat on the bleachers next to the track, dressed in a grey hoodie and green jeans. Kirsch had sent her a text around 1 AM telling her to meet him here. Well she's here; but where was Kirsch? 

Danny let out a long stream of a sigh and arose from the bleachers, waltzing onto the field inside the track, checking her phone again to make sure he said to meet her here. _He said to meet him here... I'm on time- where the hell is he?_

Hefty arms wrapped around Danny's waist, causing her to elbow her attacker. He let out an oof and fell to the ground. Danny was just about ready to kill someone until she saw it was Kirsch she, in fact, elbowed. Danny gasped and dropped to her knees on the small sheet of snow layering the ground, aiding her boyfriend, who was clutching where her elbow struck and rolling side to side.

"Damn D-bear; you have some really rough elbows." He said.

"Sorry, sorry... Just, you scared me."

"I was trying to surprise you. You know, be romantic or some shit." Kirsch sat up, rubbing his stomach. "Whelp, that was ruined and I nearly died."

"You wouldn't have died." Danny retorted. He gave her a pointed look. "Just... Okay, maybe I would have killed you. But I didn't, so, yay!" Kirsch broke out into a grin. Danny helped him to his feet, rubbing his back, though it was now soaked from the snow he fell in. She really did give it her all when she elbowed him; she just hopes it doesn't bruise, that she didn't hurt him too bad. Additionally, Kirsch's abs were too glorious to be ruined by a reckless bruise.

"So why'd you call me out here?" Danny asked. 

"Oh! Right!" Kirsch then reached his hand under his sweater, and pulled out a blanket. 

"Um... How did you fit-"

"Don't worry about it." Kirsch said, taking Danny's hand. How did he fit that in his sweater without it bulking out? "I called you out here to do what we used to." Kirsch started dragging Danny through the track, crossing through the thin veil of snow on the ground.

"What we used to do?" Danny retorted. Kirsch flashed her a grin.

"Yeah. What we used to do." He opened the chain-linked fence surrounding the track and continued their journey, traveling in the dark night, the moon light bouncing off the thin veil of snow. He dragged her to the football field, and sprawled the blanket down across the snow.

"Cool, so, wanna tell me what we're doing?" Danny asked, still suspicious of whatever her boyfriend had planned.

"We," he said, plopping down on the blanket, "are doing what we used to." Danny rolled her eyes and plopped down next to him.

"I understand that tidbit, but what do you mean?" 

Kirsch simply grinned, and laid down. Danny rolled her eyes and laid down too, letting her hand interlace with his. She looked to the sky, the stars scattered across, the moon shining bright. Kirsch then pulled out a piece of paper, and started humming to himself.

"Uh, what is that?" Danny asked. It looked to be a certificate almost; though it was hard to make out what it said in the dark of the night. 

"It is... AHA!" Kirsch, the paper still in his hand, pointed to the sky. "There. You see that star?" Danny followed his finger and spotted a bright star, slightly  further away than the rest. Danny nodded. "I bought you it." Danny's eyes grew three times their size and her jaw dropped.

"Kirsch! You can't just..." Buy a star? You actually can't. Danny furrowed her eyebrows and looked at her boyfriend. "How much did it cost?"

"Oh I got it like real cheap. Like, 12 dollars." Kirsch replied. Danny cocked and eyebrow and shook her head.

"You realize that was a scam, right?"

Kirsch's expression dropped.

"Oh..." 

Danny shook her head to herself and broke out into a smile. She took the paper- she couldn't stand seeing him look like a kicked puppy.

"Thats okay though! We can still pretend that..." She looked at the certificate and did her best to keep her smile. "Super Galactica 0425 is our star." Out of all names he could have named their hypothetical star, it's that?

"I chose 0425 because that's the night I asked you out. Junior prom, remember?" _Just keep smiling, Lawrence._

"I remember." Danny replied, and rested her head on Kirsch's shoulder. "... You totally got scammed though."

"I can't believe I fell for that." 

They spent the rest of the night there, gazing at the stars, making shapes out of the alignment, though Danny made fun of Kirsch heavily for falling for such a scam. She loved him for that, however; that he just blindly believes in the good of others. It's something she always lacked, but maybe that's why they work so well.

It worked to a point where they both know they'll be married one day.

 

**Carmilla**

 

She doesn't know why she's doing this; she really should just ask her to bring her back. This had to be the most preposterous idea Carmilla has ever agreed to, though if it weren't for Laura she wouldn't have ever agreed to it. Laura and Carmilla were currently trudging through the snow, walking hand in hand through the old field with the chain-linked fence. Carmilla remembers this place; this was the last time she saw Laura. There were fireworks in the sky, there were crowds and vendors all around. She remembers this place; this was where Carmilla and Laura had kissed, where they had saw each other last before Carmilla moved. 

Though the thought made her heart race, it still didn't make up for the fact that she was currently getting bitten by the harsh winds of winter, the cold air sending her into occasional shivers, snow sometimes kicking up and sneaking it's way into her combat boots. Really, this was some form of torture to Carmilla, but Laura still wore a bright smile and a sense of adventure. She also had a blanket tucked underneath her arm, and now Carmilla was starting to see why she had that.

"Cupcake. What exactly do you have in mind?" Carmilla asked for the millionth time that night, though her voice wasn't as exasperated as she wanted it to be. She's always adored Laura's sense of adventure; something she's always lacked.

"Is it not obvious?" Laura asked, her eyes scanning the field. 

"Not to me." Carmilla replied.

"Well, we're going stargazing."

Carmilla's jaw dropped.

"Laura! It's like negative 32 degrees out!"

"Nooo. If it were that much, it'd be snowing and we'd be dead." Laura said. Carmilla rolled her eyes. "Come on, lighten up. I thought you loved the stars."

"I do." Carmilla stated. "It's just... It's cold out and there's snow on the ground."

"Which is why I have this handy-dandy blanket." Laura retorted. "Besides, there's barely an inch on the ground. Look at the stars and tell me you don't want to go stargazing." Carmilla realized then, this whole night, she hadn't even bothered to look up; her eyes have been trained on Laura. She always looks at the stars, they always pulled her gaze to them like a magnet. Reluctantly, Carmilla looked to the night sky, spotting the crescent moon and dazzling stars, scattered across like a kaleidoscope of diamonds. Carmilla smiled softly to herself, feeling the instant wash of peace that came with the stunning sight. Laura came to a halt.

"Here." Laura said, then proceeded to fan out the blanket before placing it on top of the sheet of snow. 

"Why here?" Carmilla asked.

"Because your smile got bigger when we got to this spot." Laura replied. Had it? Though, Carmilla isn't so sure she's smiling because of the sky. Laura plopped down on the navy-blue blanket, straightening out the fabric. "Come on, then. Sit down." Carmilla did just that, and after a few minutes, the two got into cozy positions, lying on their backs, staring to the night sky. 

Carmilla watched as the stars twinkled and the moon shined, reflecting off the white snow, looking like a glowing paste of white magic, though as she turned her head she knew the true beauty was the girl next to her. Laura stared in awe at the dark sky; her eyes looking so full in the moonlight. Carmilla smiled softly to herself, watching the way Laura's hair seemed to glow in the dark of night. Her features softened somehow. As Laura turned her head and looked at Carmilla, she grew a smile as well, sending Carmilla's heart to beat mad in her chest. 

"Was this as bad as you thought?" Laura asked. Carmilla shook her head. "Good." For a moment, time seemed frozen, the world spinning around Carmilla and Laura, her honey-brown eyes, a benign gaze to them. Carmilla could have kissed her just then, in this serene moment. But she knew how that went last time. _That's not... What friends do._ Time came back and she continued on with the earth's rotation. Carmilla forced herself to look back to the sky, the familiar pang of guilt in her heart. She wanted to apologize for kissing Laura; she really did. But that meant bringing up the forbidden topic, and Carmilla doesn't know if she could do that. 

"Hey. What's wrong?" Laura said in the most gentle voice Carmilla has ever heard. Carmilla sighed. How does she always know? 

"Nothing." Carmilla replied, but her heart still ached.

"Don't make me make you tell me." Laura said, a tint of mischief in her voice.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Carmilla asked, and suddenly Laura was straddling her, replacing the moon in the sky with her beaming smile. Carmilla cocked an eyebrow. "What are you doing?"

"You're ticklish." 

Carmilla's eyes widened.

"Don't you dare."

"I won't unless you tell me." Laura said, her hands dangerously hovering above Carmilla's stomach. She had to decide then what was worse; uncontrollable laughter and wiggling around or discussing the forbidden topic. Carmilla chewed on her bottom lip, but her mind went blank as she remembered the last time she was here. She could almost see the fireworks in the sky, almost feel the way Laura's lips felt, how her heart thrashed, the smile she wore. Carmilla found herself reaching up and tucking strands of Laura's hair behind her ear. Laura laughed and grabbed Carmilla's wrists, pinning them down above her head.

"Oh no. No distracting me." Laura teased, though both of their smiles were so wide they nearly covered their whole faces. She thought about what Kirsch had told her, that Laura had feelings for her too... But was it true? Or did Kirsch simply misinterpret what Laura had said? Could she still? But if that were the case... Then why pull away when they kissed? If she did it now... Would she still pull away? Her face was so close; she could- she very well could. If what Kirsch said was true, and Laura truly did have feelings for her... Then could she? No, if she's going to start anywhere, she has to start by talking this throught.

"Hey... Laura, can we-"

"TOO LATE!" Her words were interrupted when Laura released her wrists and started tickling her. 

"OH GOD!" Carmilla exclaimed, an uncontrollable laughter fleeing her lips as she squirmed underneath the devil's touch. Maybe she'll do it another time, figure out if Laura actually still had feelings for her.

Now, she needed to focus on not dying from this torturous laughter..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos!  
> I apologize for this  
> All of it  
> This whole mess  
> I'm never drinking caffeine again


	24. Same Old Same... Hold?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tis the Day before Christmas Eve; December 23rd. Laura bumps into the past Carmilla wasn't part of, and in the process Carmilla learns a couple of things.  
> Lafontaine's family might just drive them to the brink of insanity, but at least they have Perry.  
> With Christmas being so close, Kirsch just wants to make his suddenly dull girlfriend happy. But when he accidentally spills the beans on their "One Day" marriage, will it actually be a joyous celebration?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My fkin g. My FKIN g. @Any God; save my soul for it is perishing.

**Carmilla**

 

 _Pathetic. I am absolutely pathetic and none of this plague of a holiday will ever convince me otherwise._ It was the day before Christmas Eve; December 23rd. Carmilla honestly couldn't believe she's survived this long during these abhorrent weeks of Christmas Spirit. Lucky for her, there hadn't been much snow, for if there was, Carmilla was sure she'd downright sacrifice herself to some Adonis Hunt.

Currently, Laura was dragging Carmilla through a store in a nearby town; some plaza Carmilla didn't care to remember. All she knew was that Laura was holding her hand, and that she was tugging her around like a puppy on a leash, but the hand-holding made it bearable. The plaza was massive; three floors, all of which held multiple stores, lounge areas, and walkways, including the waste that was Christmas decorations and lights. In the center of the mall, they somehow managed to fit a large christmas tree and "Santa Claus" to sit and take pictures. And, yeah. Carmilla and Laura did get pictures with him; but it was very much against her own free will.

"Cupcake." Carmilla said, as Laura dragged her into yet another store plagued by the Christmas spirit. "Can we take a break? I don't think I've had this much exercise since I tried to run a marathon." She lamented. Where were they? Carmilla examined her surroundings as Laura spoke.

"Come on. Last minute Christmas shopping is fun!" Laura replied, flashing Carmilla a heartwarming smile. 

"You're not the one holding the bags, cutie." She retorted, holding up the several bags clasped in her other hand. They were getting increasingly heavier by the minutes. Laura sighed and stopped in her tracks, standing before Carmilla for a moment, their conjoined hands dropping to the side. God damn it; why did Laura have to look so cute? She can feel her walls being torn down. She wore a phthalocyanine green sweater with Christmas characters all over it, a green shirt underneath, the collar tucked above the sweater. Carmilla was surprised when Laura lifted her free hand, brushing strands of Carmilla's hair out of her face, the touch so gentle it nearly confused Carmilla.

"Don't be a grump." Laura stated, her smile bright. Carmilla fought off her own smile.

"Isn't that why you made me wear this stupid Grumpy cat sweater?" Carmilla retaliated, gesturing to the disgruntled cat with the permanent frown dressed on the red fabric. Laura rolled her eyes, and tucked a strand of Carmilla's hair behind her ears, running it through her fingers until she reached it's end.

"Fine. You can be a little bit of a grump." Carmilla couldn't fight off her smile anymore as Laura rested her hand on her cheek. "You deserve a break. Come on." Disappointment soon came as Laura pulled her hand from Carmilla's cheek, though the other stayed tightly wrapped in Carmilla's hand. She dragged her out of the store, and for a moment, Carmilla had a chance to breathe without inhaling the toxic scent of "Christmas Cookie Butterscotch Fire log Cult Ceremony" or whatever Christmas smell they sprayed all over this god damn plaza.

"Where are you taking me, creampuff?" Carmilla asked, though she'd go wherever Laura took her. 

"One of the lounge areas of course." Laura replied, making a path through the rushed crowds, too grabbing last-minute Christmas gifts.

"You know, I really haven't a clue as to why you like to buy all your gifts last minute." 

"It's fun this way! You can't put too much thought into it, you know? There's less pressure on yourself to buy something, because you _have_ to buy something whether you want to or not. So the thoughts going into it can't be over bearing." _How is that less pressure?_ Carmilla thought to herself. She doesn't think she'll ever, ever understand Laura, but, yet again... She smiled, watching Laura weave her way through the crowd like she owned the domaine, her hand holding Carmilla's tightly, a bright smile painted on her expression.

She doesn't want to.

Laura lead Carmilla to one of the small lounge areas; two couches and one chair, two vending machines nearby, some plants inside pottery. Carmilla was just ready to plop down for a much needed rest when she felt Laura's hand tighten around hers in a death grip, almost hurting her. Concern immediately kicked in.

"Laura?" Carmilla said, though she was a million miles away. Her eyes were trained somewhere, someone they were following, the look of pure horror shadowed in them. Carmilla tried to follow her gaze, but all she caught was the rush of crowds. "Laura what's wrong?" Carmilla asked. Laura's free hand gripped Carmilla's shoulder.

"My- my ex. Alice. She's here." 

Carmilla's eyes widened, remembering the tales she's told of Alice. As her eyes searched the crowd, they locked with haunting blue eyes that felt like they were burrowing into her soul.

_Her ex?_

 

**Lafontaine**

 

"I'm just saying, it's brainwashing! If we're doing this, then I'm saying I'm a damned dog." Uncle Frank said. 

"Are you saying my kid is on the same level as a dog?" Lafontaine's father shot back. It's been like this for days, and Lafontaine doesn't know if they can do it much more. They weren't sure if they were about to snap; they were so hurt and angry that they were just lifeless.

"Well she's a bitch so I'd say so." Uncle Frank retorted, the words said with such a bite Lafontaine winced and closed their eyes. _Just three little letters. Just three little letters._ Lafontaine told themselves in their head. They tried to focus on the Christmas special playing from the TV. They're happy- why can't Lafontaine be happy? Why can't they just have a family who accepts them? A whole family?

"YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE! MY HOME! AND YOU INSULT MY CHILD?" Lafontaine's mother sent everyone in shock as she screamed, her voice cracking. Okay, Lafontaine can't stay silent anymore. They can't let everyone continue to stand up for them. They know that it will make things worse for them if they speak up, but they have to. As they opened their mouth to speak, the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it." Lafontaine said, rushing to their feet. They paced to the door, their family muttering insults and retorts that Lafontaine chose to ignore. A relief they've never known washed over them as Perry stood there, her bright smile painted onto her expression that lit the dark Lafontaine was feeling inside.

"Hey sweetheart." Perry greeted. A smile of their own quickly spread across their cheeks as Perry pecked their lips. 

"Oh do you really have to flaunt it?" Aunt Janice said. Perry looked to her over their shoulder.

"Uh, pardon?" Perry replied.

"This... Lesbian fiasco. You don't need to shove it down our throats." She grumbled. Lafontaine flinched at the harsh words. Perry pushed past Lafontaine, taking a step inside.

"I'm sorry, can you repeat that? There must be something wrong with my ears." Perry said. _Ohhh boy._ Lafontaine knew a storm was coming- Perry's eye was twitching.

"I'm not repeating myself." Aunt Janice retorted.

"You heard her loud and clear." Uncle Frank added.

"Leave them alone." Uncle Jack said next.

"Thank you Jackson, but I believe I'd need a word with these two..." She grimaced. "Things. Because I find it hard to believe that _anyone_ would believe that _our_ relationship is being shoved down their throats when I simply opened the door and kissed my partner." Perry said. Lafontaine had to fight off their grin; they loved it when she got like this. "And, is it really us that are shoving it down your throats? Heterosexuality is everywhere. In books, on TV, in movies. You know, it's almost suffocating, really. So when I simply open a door, give a simple kiss to my partner's lips, _I'm_ suddenly shoving it down _your_ throat? Or is it to replace your husbands dick because you just can't get any?"

Lafontaine's eyebrows shot to their hairline as they clasped their hand over their mouth. They should stop her- they really should. But they've been dealing with this for far too long and the shocked looks on their faces were too good.

"I'm so incredibly sorry that you have to spend the rest of your life miserable. That must..." She shrugged unapologetically. "Really suck. Maybe you're just jealous, because you know what? I'm happy. We," she took Lafontaine's hand, "are happy. And maybe you just can't bear to see that because you have to stay in your god forsaken marriage because you've spent so much of your miserable time together that you would have no where else to go. Or maybe you don't like seeing two human beings in love because you have no idea what it's like to be in love. It must suck to have to be part of a loveless marriage, really. Especially when your husband looks like Duck Dynasty and you look like your parents were brother and sister." _S A V A G E._ "Now, I'll be taking my adorable, gorgeous significant other to my home, so you can live your little close-minded, miserable lives in peace. Good day." 

Perry tugged Lafontaine out of their house, giving a harsh glare that could nearly kill a man before slamming the front door shut. Lafontaine wasn't sure if they should say something as she dragged them to her car. They were impressed; extremely impressed, and oh-so in love. As they clambered into the passenger side, Perry revving the engine, they couldn't keep it in anymore.

"Holy shit! Holy shit!" They exclaimed, breaking into a wide smile. "Perry! That was... That was beautiful! That was so... Incredible!" They kissed the back of her hand. "Thank you for standing up for me." Perry shook her head, her grip so tight on the steering wheel her knuckles founded a new shade of white. 

"Your family pisses me off! What the actual hell! It's the day before Christmas Eve and they say that shit!" Lafontaine decided to keep their mouth shut as Perry ranted, babbling on about how terrible their family (not their immediate one) was with incredibly explicit words. They could only smile, watching her as they knew how terribly in love they were. Of course, maybe they let her go a little far with some of her comments, but really they deserved it. They smiled. 

God, they were the luckiest person on earth. 

 

**Laura**

 

This- no. This couldn't have been happening. She wanted to run, she wanted to escape, to hide. She could have- she well could have, but as Alice's empty blue eyes locked with hers there was no going back. Laura's feet became anchored to the ground, holding Carmilla's hand and shoulder in a death grip. A smirk spread across Alice's lips- she's seen that smirk before. Nothing good could come from when she smirks like that. It's been a little more than a year since she's seen her, but it seems she hasn't changed a bit. As Alice began to approach her, her heart started to ache.

She thought back to all the times she found out Alice had cheated on her, the times she found out it was Alice who spread whatever lie it was that week, but only she could make her feel better. Laura remembers how hooked she was to Alice, being both her misery and her sanctuary. She remembers the manipulation, the mind games, the wicked smirks and taunting gestures, but she was hooked; blindly so. And as she stood before her, Laura could only feel jeopardized.

"Laura!" Alice said, her sickly sweet tone playing in her voice. "What are you doing here?" Laura noticed then that some girl was hooked on her arm. She was pretty- gorgeous even. Laura felt threatened. Here was Alice, after all this time, rebounded and with a pretty girl too. And here was Laura, single, and clutching onto Carmilla for dear life. _Wait a second, clutching onto a really hot girl for dear life..._ An idea, one idiotic and extremely reckless no doubt, struck her. She eyed Carmilla up and down, her hand gripping her shoulder, the other interlaced with Carmilla's hand. If anyone didn't know them personally... She looked back to Alice with a confident smile.

"I'm shopping with my girlfriend." Laura said proudly. 

"Girlfriend?" Carmilla said, but as Laura flashed her a pleading look Carmilla seemed to get it. "Yep. Girlfriend. Me." Carmilla said immediately after. Oh god- Laura forgot she was a terrible liar. 

"Oh, lovely. So am I." Alice said, swinging her arm around the girl's shoulders. "This is Samantha." Laura released Carmilla's shoulder in favor of shaking the timid girl's hand, but she couldn't help but notice Alice's blue eyes trained on Carmilla. _Okay- I get it. She's pretty. But she's supposed to be my girlfriend._ Laura suddenly got territorial over Carmilla; for what Alice knows, Carmilla's her girlfriend. Why is Alice making heart eyes?

"This is Carmilla." Laura announced proudly. Alice smirked when they shook hands, being so bold as to rubbing her thumb over Carmilla's hand. Laura eyed Carmilla, seeing how uncomfortable she was. _Oh, Alice better get her predatory hand off of her before I cut it off._ Laura thought to herself. Carmilla's hand returned to Laura's as soon as Alice released it.

"Why don't we go on a double date? You know, catch up a bit." Alice said.

"Oh I-"

"We'd be glad to." Laura cut Carmilla off, engaging in some staring contest with Alice that Laura was going to win.

"Perfect."

Laura put on her best smile, the glaring contest still happening.

If Alice wants a double date, Laura will be happy to oblige.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla isn't sure if this was the best decision she's ever made or the worst. Laura was acting extremely territorial over her; like extremely. Hand holding, hugging, a lot of kissing her cheek. Alice's girlfriend seemed to be just as confused as Carmilla pertaining to the feud that seemed to be happening between Alice and Laura. The way their eyes burned into each other was enough to leave scorch marks on Carmilla's leather pants. Carmilla wonders if Laura actually forgot that Carmilla wasn't her girlfriend, because every time Alice would eye Carmilla up and down, or gawk at her, she would kiss Carmilla's cheek, or pronounce something about them being girlfriends.

Not that Carmilla minded.

No no, not at all, which is why she may believe it's the best decision she's ever made. But it also could be the worst because this wasn't real, and she had to fight the urge to punch Alice in the face, knowing what she knows about her, knowing what she did to Laura, and the way she's blatantly gawking at Carmilla right next to her girlfriend. 

"So where do you work?" Laura asked. Every time Laura would speak to Alice, each word contained some sort of bite, like no matter what she said she was trying to insult Alice. 

"At a pizzeria near my college." Alice replied. "And on top of that, I work for a homeless shelter." Carmilla cocked an eyebrow. Her? Little miss evil? Working for a homeless shelter- Carmilla found that hard to believe. "What about you?"

"I work at a local library with Carm, yeah." What? No she didn't. "It does extremely well, actually. People say our bookstore is the only interesting one." What? Our bookstore? Was Laura ill? "We go to a college in Austria- extremely hard to get into as well. We own a nice apartment nearby with a view of the city." Carmilla stared at Laura in disbelief. Was she doing okay? She couldn't believe the utter bullshit that just poured from Laura's mouth. Did she get sick? Some kind of flu? A virus?

"Wow. School, a job, and an apartment. Must be pretty hard to manage it all." Alice said, crossing her arms.

"Yeah, well. With Carm I can do anything. Right Carm?" Laura said, nudging Carmilla with her elbow. No. No she has no idea what the hell Laura was talking about. Her words were so disconnected from reality that she was actually concerned. "Carm?" Laura said, and a harsh pain spiked in Carmilla's foot as Laura stepped on it with her heel.

"Yeah!" Carmilla said, playing off her pain by leaning forward. "Yeah. We, uh, anything is possible as long as I have my..." Her what? Cupcake? Creampuff? "Lovely girlfriend." For a moment, Laura's gaze switched to Carmilla. This has been the first time Laura had looked at her while Alice was there. Her eyes softened, just for a moment, and Carmilla suddenly would agree to whatever Laura said or did, but the look was gone as soon as Alice spoke. 

"How long have you two been together?" Alice asked. 

"4 months." Laura replied quickly. "What about you two?" They looked at each other, and for a moment Carmilla could actually see something human in Alice's eyes. But, as though to prove her wrong, Alice eyed Carmilla in with a shade of seduction.

"6 months." Her girlfriend squeaked. Laura seemed to catch Alice's gaze, and god Carmilla wishes she hadn't. She could literally feel anger radiating from Laura, so much so it actually concerned Carmilla. 

"So tell me about yourself, Carmilla." Alice said, her tone low, tainted with seduction. _Yikes._ Was all Carmilla could think as she saw Laura's hands ball into fists.

"Myself?" Carmilla said out loud. Alice nodded, a smirk tugging on the corner of her lips. She opened her mouth to speak but her words caught in her throat as Laura's hand landed on her thigh, gently massaging it, shooting an array of nerves down her spine. Carmilla's eyes widened. She eyed Laura, silently asking her what the frilly hell she was doing. But Laura simply shot her a wink, and continued to glare at Alice. "Myself- right. Myself. Me." 

"That's what I said." Alice replied coolly, oblivious to what Laura was doing to Carmilla. _God, she's good with her hands._ Carmilla could barely think.

"Well, as Laura stated, we-" Carmilla gripped the table as Laura's hand moved higher up her thigh, Carmilla's cheeks tinting a shade of red. "We, uh. W-we-"

"Everything okay?" Alice asked. _Besides the fact that I'm having a stroke?_

"Yep. Everything is fine everything is perfectly a-okay I'm good are you good?"

"I'm... Good." Alice said, cocking her head to the side. Carmilla's heart thrashed in her chest. Out of all times she chooses to do this, it's now? Laura's lips brushed past Carmilla's ear.

"Is this okay?" She whispered, her words like a sweet venom. Alice gave a confused stare, but Carmilla nodded. This was _definitely_ okay. Alice still sat, waiting for Carmilla's answer. _Seriously? Laura just whispered all seductive like in my ear and she **still** has no clue what's happening under this table?_

"So, we... We do. I do." Carmilla couldn't think straight, her mind only focused on Laura's hand. _That's not... What friends do._ The words rang in her head, snapping her back to the reality that this doesn't mean anything to Laura, that she's only pretending to be her girlfriend for- for what? Carmilla doesn't even know why she's doing this, but clearly whatever the reason it isn't important. The fact still remained that she isn't sure what Laura's feelings were, or if she even had any for Carmilla. Carmilla jolted out of the seat, earning confused looks from the three.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." Carmilla announced, before rushing off to the stalls. As soon as she bursted through the door she called the one person who knew just about everything; Kirsch. She dialed him up, and waited patiently for him to answer. Her mind raced. Why did Laura do that? Mostly, why did Carmilla let her do that? Why the fuck is Carmilla pretending to be Laura's girlfriend? 

"Hello?" He greeted.

"Kirsch! Oh my god, I've never been happier to hear your dumb voice."

"Uh... Glad to hear to you too? Why, what happened? I thought you were out shopping with Laura?" He asked.

"I am- I was. I don't know." Was Carmilla's mind still there? It was going crazy with what just happened. She took a few breaths, calming her racing heart and the tumbling of her stomach. "Okay, so I'm just gonna tell you. Laura and I were shopping or whatever, and then her ex, Alice, showed up. One thing lead to the other and now I'm pretending to be her girlfriend and she just... I don't know. She's acting a little..."

"Possessive?" _Completely._ "Crazy?" _One hundred percent._ "Impulsive?" _Absolutely._

Carmilla stayed silent for a moment. 

"How did you..."

"She gets like that when Alice is around." Kirsch stated. "Their relationship was pretty fucked up, if she ever told you."

"I heard some pretty mortifying stories." Carmilla admitted, leaning back on the door. 

"Yeah. I don't know what it is, man, but it just flips something inside of her, like a switch or something. One time she signed herself up for a hot-dog eating contest and tried to streak during a carnival."

Carmilla cocked an eyebrow.

"Why did she-"

"Don't ask." Add that to the long list of things she needs to talk to Laura about. "Point is, she goes a little crazy. When those two are together things get a little... Hectic, so just do your best to keep up." Kirsch explained. Carmilla sighed, and nodded.

"Okay. I'll do that. Thanks." 

"No problem. Call me later- maybe you'll guys end up together for real." 

Carmilla rolled her eyes.

"Doubt it. Bye beefcake."

"Bye." 

Carmilla hung up her phone and slipped it into her pocket. She let her head fall back against the door for a moment. What else will happen? Carmilla could only wonder, and hope Laura doesn't get too crazy, because if she does something like that again Carmilla might actually die.

Or become very much alive. Carmilla isn't exactly sure what's going on with Laura these days.

 

**Kirsch**

 

There was something off about Danny as they sat at her family table, eating dinner quietly. He could tell. He noticed it whenever her family was around- there was just something different about her, like someone pulled a plug and she became this dull, unmotivated corps masquerading as a human being. This wasn't the Danny he was used to- no no. He was used to competitive Danny, animated Danny, always-has-good-posture Danny. This- he had no idea who was sitting next to him and eating Shepard's pie. There was something wrong- incredibly wrong, and he wanted to know what it was.

Danny never talked much about her family. What he's known he's figured out himself by coming to her house or seeing them at events like the reunion. Even then when they were kids, the most of times he's come here was uninvited. The couple times he was invited her parents were gone. There wasn't much to Danny's family, really.

Her father was a strict military man, you know, that type of dad. Drill Sargent type guy. He ran a tight ship around here. He was in his 50's, had a weird brown/grey scruff of a beard, and a bald head. His eyes were so dark they were practically black; you could never see the pupils to his eyes. From what Kirsch had gathered, he was extremely strict; scheduled everyone to be up by 6AM, set up a shower schedule for his family so no one fought over it, family breakfast every morning, pick-up times- every thing was organized. He had many rules; and if you broke one or more you better have a damn good excuse otherwise you're grounded for up to three months.

Her mother was the typical suburban mom, really. She was all smiles most of the time, though it never reached her eyes. She had red hair like Danny's, traveling just down to her shoulders that curled at the ends. She was sweet, and quiet. Always having a compliment to give, a smile to share. Though she always seemed very fragile; like she could break and snap at any moment. Kirsch was never sure if she could snap as in kill someone, or snap as in cry. He always made sure to be extra nice to her.

Danny had two brothers and a sister. Her sister was older; about 25, had brown hair that was always in a ponytail. She was kind, and that weird artistic type sister that just went to some underground concert or saw some vintage painting that she'd tell you all about. She was funny, sure. Just a little out of it. Danny's brothers were both twins, aging at 12; one was trouble and one was brains really. Trouble had the brown hair and brains had the red hair. When combined, they both managed to pull off some scheme on someone. Apart, trouble continued to reek havoc while brains would be everyone's little angel. 

So really, Kirsch didn't see why Danny became so out of it, or why she was so colorless. Her family was great from what he's grown up with. 

"Do you like the Shepard's Pie?" Danny's mother ask. Kirsch nodded.

"Oh yes! It's fantastic Mrs. Lawrence." Kirsch replied. His mind was so focused on Danny that he forget to eat. (That _never_ happens). He took a large bite out of his food to prove a point, though Danny still just poked hers around, increasing his concern. One thing they shared was their love for food- why wasn't she eating? Maybe he can cheer her up. "You know, Danny and I were thinking of buying this apartment." He said, hoping to get her to join the conversation.

"Oh really?" Mrs. Lawrence replies.

"I just hope it's big enough- you two are _huge_." Mikey, aka the brains twin, says. Kirsch grinned.

"I think it's big enough. But, whatever she wants I'll go with." He nudged Danny with his elbow. "Right D-bear?" Though Danny still stared at her plate, poking her food. "D-bear?"

"Huh?" She shook her head. "Oh yeah." Though he doubted they knew what they were talking about. 

"So Danny. How is school going?" Mr. Lawrence asked, clasping his hands together.

"It's good, colonel." Danny said. He also made the kids call him colonel- Kirsch didn't really know why, but it must be that weird ex-military cop or whatever type thing. 

"Yeah. D-bear was telling me about how she's a TA's in her lit class. I don't know how she does it. I can barely survive in my own classes." Kirsch added, making sure to take another large bite of his Shepard's pie.

"Oh that's interesting. Well, Danny has always been one to always exceed expectations." Her mother said with a wide smile. Kirsch grinned and nodded, swallowing before he spoke just like Danny told him to do right before dinner. He always forgot talking with food in his mouth was rude.

"Oh yeah. D-bear's like incredible." Kirsch looked at Danny, who still seemed out of it. He has to make her feel better somehow. "That's why I'm gonna marry her one day- right D-bear?" The words slipped from his mouth before he could stop them, and as soon as they were a unison gasp came from her family.

"You're getting married?" Danny's sister, Ava, exclaims. Kirsch eyed Danny out of the corner of his eye. Her fork was tightly gripped in her hand, for safety measures, he scooted his chair two inches away. 

"I, uh, we-"

"See! I told you you'd end up heterosexual." Mrs. Lawrence says. It smacked Kirsch across the face like the mighty hand of Zeus himself. That's it- that's why she's so dull around them. That's why she never talks much of his and Danny's relationship. That's why he was never really allowed over here when they were dating. Oh my god; _her family is biphobic._

"Mother! That's not how it works." Ava defended. Okay- maybe not everyone. But Ava moved out as soon as she was 18; or, when Danny was 12, before she even came out. She could have never been there to defend her.

"Oh, hush. I knew you'd end up straight! I'm so excited!" Mrs. Lawrence exclaims again.

"Mrs. Lawrence, with all do respect, Danny is not straight. Just because we're together doesn't mean her sexuality has differed." Kirsch said. Oh man, he's an idiot. A big, big idiot. 

"It was just a phase." Mr. Lawrence said sternly. "We knew it was from the beginning."

Kirsch grimaced.

Oh Kirsch has fucked up- he's fucked up real bad. His blood boiled; there was not a lot of ways to prove this. Danny is with a guy, a guy that is him. But she's still bisexual. How does he fix this?

"Look, if a white person marries a black person, does that make the white person black? No. Because that's not how it works. It's the same with being bisexual. 

"Yeah because you can't change race. Duh." Egan, the trouble twin, said. They've even plagued the children with this thought?

"Danny can't change her sexuality either." Kirsch snapped. _Ooo he's like 12- better tone it down._

"God damn it Kirsch! Why can't you ever keep your mouth shut!" Danny exclaimed. He cringed. Man- he fucked up. He fucked up so bad. So so bad. How can he make up for this? "Mom, Dad, Egan. I'm bisexual. I'm not straight. Being with a guy doesn't change that; just how when I was with Laura I wasn't a lesbian."

"Because you're straight." Ms. Lawrence said.

"I'm not straight! God damn it, Kirsch!" She exclaimed, jumping out of her seat. "Why do you always have to ruin everything for me?" A pain in his heart he's never known replaced the blood pumping through his veins, beating slow in agony. Was it possible for his heart to literally break? Danny threw her fork down on the table and rushed out of the room. He heard her angry footsteps go up the stairs before the piercing sound of a door slamming. Kirsch sat stunned for a moment, and moved to his own two feet. 

"If she's with a man, that doesn't change her sexuality." Kirsch said, quieter than the times he spoke before. "I hope you understand that, because I think I just ruined my relationship with her. So whether she ends up with a guy or a girl or someone else, I hope you can accept that." He moved quietly out of the home, getting back into his mom's car. He didn't care about anything else than the girl he just ruined. She's right; he ruins everything for her. It wasn't his decision to make to announce that.

Why can't he ever keep his mouth shut?

 

**Carmilla**

 

"Carmilla found her on the streets, and nurtured her back to health. It was beautiful, really. To see her go from this scrawny, helpless kitten to this beautiful, strong cat." Laura said with a smile. 30 minutes. They've only been at this place for 30 minutes and the amount of bullshit that has spilled from Laura's mouth was astonishing. So far, Carmilla donates her free time with the homeless, donates almost all of her money to charity, was a background character in the fucking avengers, and is 'great in bed'. Though that last part was true, the rest was bullshit.

Carmilla sat with her jaw slightly hanging in disbelief, her eyebrow cocked, one arm resting on the back of the booth, and one leg strategically crossed over the other. She didn't mind pretending to be Laura's girlfriend; no, not at all. What she minded was being held on this pedestal where, if you actually knew her, would be deemed to disappoint. 

"Wow, heartwarming." Alice said. Additionally, Carmilla had to stop every fiber in her being from punching Alice in the face. She's managed to passive aggressively insult Laura on several occasions; each time Carmilla paying it back with a witty retort. She didn't mind playing the role if it meant putting this ex in her place, but she couldn't help but be irked by the constant glare-off happening between Laura and Alice. Laura scarcely looked her way the entire night; it sucked. 

Truly, sucked.

But, she knows firsthand she can't compete with an ex. She knows if it were Ell here, she'd be cowering behind Laura, keeping her eyes trained on Ell to make sure she didn't try anything. But, she wouldn't act this crazy. No no, Laura was acting practically insane.

"Right Carm?" Laura said, playing with the hand that draped just before her shoulder.

"Uh, yeah. Right." Carmilla replied. What were they talking about? This was happening a lot during the night, Carmilla dazing off into her own thoughts until Laura would say her name. 

"Touching story. Ah look our food's coming." Alice said. Carmilla turned, and it was as if the world hated her; truly hated her. Hated her entire existence because here came Brandy. Laura suddenly gripped Carmilla's hand, playing with it over her shoulder and making intense eye contact with the waitress. Carmilla could have died just then; she well could have.

"Oh. Hey guys." Brandy said, plopping their tray of food down onto a table. _Oh god oh god oh god._ Carmilla thought, watching as Brandy placed their orders in front of them.

"It's been a while." Laura teased, though her voice was carried with anything but humor, rather anger. Her grip on Carmilla's hand tightened, almost painfully so. 

"Yeah. It has been." Brandy said, placing her hand on Carmilla's shoulder. "I see you didn't need to call." Call, right. She had Brandy's number saved into her phone.

"Oh, no I-"

"Call for what?" Alice cut Carmilla off, a menacing smile. A tighter grip on Carmilla's hand.

"Oh, it's nothing really." Carmilla said, getting overwhelmed- or possibly even flustered.

"I'd love to know." Alice's girlfriend added, the same menacing smile. What? She's shy; not evil. There's not supposed to be two evil people in a relationship. But it seemed they were feeding off of Carmilla's distress like leeches.

"It's. I- she's my-" God damn it, out of all times to get tongue tied it had to be now? "We know each other from..." 

"Were you ex lovers?" Samantha inquired.

"Perhaps a one night stand?" Alice added, both of them seeming to lean closer with menacing smiles and piercing eyes. Carmilla tugged on the collar of her shirt with the hand that wasn't in a death grip.

"I, um-" Was the air getting tighter? Brandy rubbed the top of Carmilla's back.

"Are you okay? We could always do it again." Brandy said, her voice low. Do it again? As in, go to hook up in a bathroom? Oh god- where the walls closing in?

"Ooo, I'd love to know what that means." Alice said.

"Oh, me too." Samantha added. 

"Um um I, she just. I-" Tighter and tighter, Laura's grip was getting tighter. "She was a..." One night stand? She was barely even that; and Carmilla doesn't want to degrade her to such right in front of the girl. Or rather, in front of Laura. "We just..." Just what? They only ever kissed. How does she even talk right now?

"What did you do?" Samantha said.

"Hook up?" Alice added.

"Ooo maybe you're part of a secret BDSM group."

"Or an orgy!" 

"Oh my god are you a swinger?" 

"Or a hooker!" 

Carmilla's head doddered between Alice and Samantha as each of them spoke, their menacing smiles and piercing eyes closing in, the walls getting closer, the air getting tighter. Carmilla could hardly keep up to each suggestion; each exchange, each squeeze to her hand and sensual rub to her shoulder.

"She's my girlfriend!" Laura suddenly exclaimed. Her hand wrapped around Carmilla's jaw and she turned her head, planting one long, and oh-so sweet kiss that took Carmilla by surprise. Her heart set off into an uneven rhythm, pounding in her chest as though it was trying to beat out of it. Her eyes fluttered shut, letting herself be taken away into the kiss as the world seemed to spin around her. Laura kissed her. She's kissing her. Right now. She called Carmilla her girlfriend and kissed her. Is kissing her. And my god, it has to be the sweetest of anything that she's ever tasted.

As Laura pulled back, she looked into Carmilla's eyes, her pupils blown out wide and her breathing shallow. But it only lasted so long, as her hand released Carmilla's jaw and her gaze landed back on Alice.

"There. Girlfriend." Laura said, crossing her arms. Everyone was stunned for a passage of time; more so Carmilla than anyone else. She exclaimed it rather loudly, which earned a couple of stares from nearby tables. How long was that kiss for? It seemed like ages had gone by, but at the same time it was too short. Carmilla slumped back into her seat, as shocked as every one else, though she was extremely enlivened by the kiss. You don't kiss someone you don't have feelings for, right? That's definitely something you don't do. Even though she's pretending to be her girlfriend, she didn't need to kiss her, right?

"Oh. So you worked it out, I see." Brandy said, a tint of harshness to her tone. Shit- if Brandy spills on their encounter then this whole thing is screwed. 

"We've... Always been worked out." Carmilla silently pleaded with her eyes for Brandy to keep her mouth shut, swinging her arm around Laura's shoulders and holding her tightly. "We've been worked out for 4 months." Carmilla added, hoping for Brandy to get the hint. She didn't; she seemed oblivious to it actually.

"Four months?" Brandy retorted. "But just two days ago we-"

"You know, I actually have to go to the bathroom. Again." Carmilla said, arising from her seat. "Mind showing me where it is?" Brandy nodded, confused, but at least she seemed to get the hint. As Brandy lead her through the ways of the restaurant, Carmilla quickly gathered her argument in her head. 

"So, you guys are together?" Brandy said, turning around as they reached the doors to the stalls. Carmilla shook her head.

"No no. Just pretending. Her ex was there and one thing lead to another and..." Carmilla sighed. "Now I'm pretending to be her girlfriend. Isn't life swell?" Brandy smiled.

"Yeah. You're talking to the girl who got denied. Twice. By the same girl. In two different restaurants she works at."

Carmilla snickered, and slipped her hands into her back pockets.

"Sorry about... That. And sorry I haven't texted you."

Brandy waved it off.

"No, it's okay. I said to text me if you changed your mind, but now you're in a fake relationship. Congrats, guys."

Carmilla smiled.

"Yeah, aren't I just so good with dealing with my emotions?" Carmilla joked. Brandy chuckled, and crossed her arms.

"Offer still stands, though. If this whole entire 'fake dating' thing doesn't turn into a real relationship, you're still free to call." 

Carmilla cocked an eyebrow.

"Really?" She still wasn't sure if she was interested, but Brandy was cute and Carmilla's not really dating Laura, and that kiss probably meant nothing to her. Brandy nodded.

"Yep. But, you should probably get back to your girl. Wouldn't wanna keep her waiting." She said, moving past Carmilla. Carmilla's eyes followed her.

"Right. Totally."

Brandy didn't bother to turn around as she wriggled her fingers next to her head in a goodbye, disappearing as she turned the corner. Carmilla sighed, and walked back to the table, but it was like she was never gone. Laura and Alice still continued in some competitive glare, fighting to be the dominant one. Carmilla sighed.

It's gonna be a long night.

 

**Danny**

 

It's been an hour since he left, and Danny still couldn't stop thinking about it, hugging her knees to her chest as she sat at the only place she knew to go; the track. How could he? Why would he? She knows he didn't mean to, and okay maybe Danny was a little harsh, but even then... He told her parents something without her even agreeing to do so. They're not even getting married! Well, they are. They will be. But they're not engaged, they're not making plans for it. Hell, they're not even moved in together yet.

Danny closed her eyes. Of course she loves Kirsch, of course she wants to marry him, of course she knows they'll be together but... God he could be an idiot sometimes. And it didn't help with her family. Her sister was the only one to ever defend her sexuality in her family, but she was never around much. Always traveling somewhere, making new art, was dating some famous photographer or having coffee with Banksy. She should have let Kirsch known about this sooner, she knows. And she's proud of him for the way he stuck up for her, but he still dropped a bomb that she was trying to hold onto. 

"I thought I'd find you here." Danny's heart sunk to the pit of her stomach, the deep clueless voice sounding and she knew he was standing in front of her. "Hey, D-bear." Danny didn't move; she didn't speak. She couldn't speak. She wasn't sure if she was angry or upset or appreciative. "Do you mind if I sit next to you?" Danny shook her head; the only motion she knew. Kirsch sat next to her as Danny kept her head buried in her knees. It was silent for a couple of moments, the wind being the only whisper to sound.

"I'm sorry." They both said at the same time, taking the other by surprise. Danny lifted her head and looked at Kirsch, his blue eyes so apologetic. 

"You first." Danny said, hugging her knees closer to her chest. Kirsch sighed, silent for a few moments. 

"I... I'm really sorry Danny. I didn't mean to tell them. I just... I'm so happy that we know we're going to get married. I've never had that much stability in my life, as you know; you're really the only steady thing, you know? And, well, when I saw you with your family, how closed off you became, I just wanted to make you happy. And you always smile when I talked about it; even when you're mad at me. So, without thinking much, I just kinda brought it up. But then I made everything worse, and your family..." Kirsch sighed. "I'm just really, really sorry Danny." Danny was next to sigh.

She knew Kirsch was genuine in his apology; if there's one thing Kirsch always was no matter what, it was genuine. Danny chewed on the inside of her cheek for a moment. Most of her anger wasn't towards Kirsch; it was towards her family, she knows that. But she also knows that she definitely is mad at Kirsch, but she can't take that out on him. She always does that, and he always takes it and is always there to accept her apology and move on. Maybe she could let this one slide. After all, his intentions were good. Hell, they always are. And he was clueless to the biphobia.

"It's okay." Danny found herself muttering. Kirsch was the only one ever allowed to see her like this, weak and vulnerable. But it's always what made their relationship stronger, and over the years she's learned from Kirsch that being vulnerable doesn't have to be a bad thing. Sometimes, it's good to be a little vulnerable. "I just... When I was dating Laura, they always said it was a phase that I'd grow out of, that I'd end up with a guy and be heterosexual. And part of me wants to prove them wrong, you know? Marry a girl as a big fuck you. But, that's not who I want to be with." The next words were hard for her to say, but they needed to be said.

"I want to be with you, Kirsch. Forever." _Too sentimental._ "Or, something." Kirsch let out an airy chuckle. "But... I thought, maybe if I gave it a couple years, they'd accept me. If I just kept explaining to them that just because I'm with a guy, that I'm still bisexual. They just stare at me like they know it all, like a big 'I told you so'. But they're not; they're wrong. They're oh so wrong and I don't know if they will ever see that. And when you told them we're getting married," she took one of Kirsch's hands, playing with his overly large fingers, "I knew that would be it, that they'd never come to accept my sexuality. I know you were just trying to make me feel better. You always have good intentions when you make your mistakes. And I love you for that. Well, I love you for a lot of reasons, but... I know you were only trying to do the right thing, and I know you didn't mean to. I forgive you." Kirsch wrapped his arm around Danny's shoulder.

"If I knew I just had to fuck up badly for you to finally say something sweet and sentimental to me I would have done it more often." Kirsch teased. Danny rolled her eyes and nudged him with her elbow. "No, I'm kidding D-bear. Joking aside, I get where your coming from. Well, I mean I don't get _get_ it, since I'm not bisexual nor a female, nor are my parents biphobic, but... I can see why. And I did my best to defend you, but I just hope they accept you in due time. If not, they don't have to go to our wedding." Danny smiled.

"We haven't even settled on an apartment yet. I can only imagine how hectic our wedding planning skills will be." Danny chaffed, rested her head on Kirsch's shoulder.

"It may be hectic, but so is everything else we do, you know? We're the same but different all at once, and I think that's why we work so well." 

"Eugh. That's so cheesy."

"Yeah, but neither of us are lactose intolerant." 

Danny once more rolled her eyes, and kissed this dumb, sentimental guy.

"Dork." 

"Psycho Society."

 

**Laura**

 

She had to beat Alice- she had to somehow. Laura was going to be the one to pay the bill. Sure, she just blowed away a lot of money on Christmas gifts and Carmilla had quietly reminded her of that, but that didn't matter. She had to beat Alice; she couldn't let the girl win.

"I will gladly pay the bill." Laura stated through gritted teeth. With Carmilla's 2-minute disappearance with Brandy, Alice's blunt gawking at Carmilla, Stephanie's random devilish side, Laura has well had enough of it. 

"No no. Let me. I will pay the bill." Alice refused, putting on her, what Laura likes to call, "oh darling" smile. It was disgusting. 

"How about you both pay the bill!" Carmilla suggested. "You know, split it."

"Not a chance." Laura said. Calling it a tie, with her? She'd never stoop to her level. 

"Okay, sweetie, you seem to be getting rather aggressive, don't you think?" Carmilla said, giving Laura's shoulder a squeeze. Laura should have been affected by the gesture, by everything that happened with Carmilla tonight really, but Laura's mind was too clouded with the toxic smoke that was Alice. 

"Not at all." Laura replied bluntly. 

"Let me pay for it." Alice insisted.

"No. Way." Laura retaliated. 

"I'll do it."

"I'm paying."

"I'm sure you have more important things to spend your money on."

"Oh I really don't. I'm paying."

"No, I will."

"You're not paying."

"You know what?" Carmilla said, taking the menu. "I'm paying for it." She pulled out a wad of cash from her pocket, confusing just about everyone, and scribbled down on it. "There. It's done. I paid. Waiter!" Carmilla called out, waving the menu. He immediately rushed to the table. "That should be enough to pay for you and your first born's college debt." Carmilla took the bags in one hand and Laura's hand in her other and pulled her out of the booth. "Ta ta Alice! Nice seeing you. Hope I never, ever see you again." Carmilla started dragging Laura out of the restaurant, tugging her through the mall until they finally reached the entrance. As soon as they were outside, the cold winter air hitting them, Carmilla stopped dead in her tracks.

"Laura! What the hell was that in there?" Carmilla exclaimed, releasing Laura's hand in favor of running it through her hair.

"What do you mean? Why did you pull me out of there! I could have totally beat her."

"Beat her in what, Laura? Beat. Her. In. _What?_ What are you trying to beat her in?" Carmilla reasoned. Laura blinked a few times. What exactly was Laura trying to beat her in? Wait a second, why the hell did Laura kiss Carmilla? Oh my god, Laura was totally... She had completely... 

"Yikes." Laura muttered. 

"Yikes is right." Carmilla grabbed Laura's hand again and started dragging her through the parking lot. 

God damn it; even now Alice has this terrible hold on her.

 

**Carmilla**

 

The ride back to Laura's home was mostly silent. Laura seemed to come down from whatever spell Alice had on her, and come back to her sanity, seeming to realize all the she's done. So far, Carmilla had counted, she kissed her about 5 times, touched her... Yeah, once, kissed her cheek nearly 30 times, and made up about 27 lies. She has a lot to explain for, but yet again, Carmilla doesn't know the whole story, and not that she minded these touches anyway, but what she minded was that it was all for this ex. Again, Carmilla didn't know the whole story, so she couldn't blame Laura for acting that way; especially with how menacing she was.

Now, Laura and Carmilla sat on the floor of Laura's room, both of them leaning their backs against the bed, Carmilla's knees bent up and her ankles crossed, resting her elbows on her knees and letting her arms drape between her legs. She wasn't sure why they were sitting on the floor, or how they even got there; she's been in her own head so much that her body's on auto pilot.

"What exactly were you trying to prove, back there?" Carmilla finally said, breaking the silent spell.

"I don't know, she just..." Laura sighed, and turned her body to face Carmilla, tucking her leg under herself. "You get the whole, crazy ex thing, right?" Carmilla nodded. Oh- she definitely understands _that_. "So, alright, I just... She makes me crazy, like there's always something I have to prove. And she smiles like she's better than me and suddenly I have to be better than her, and I know I acted insane in there and I know I pushed to far but-"

"You didn't." Carmilla found herself saying, shocking both of them for a moment. "Push... Too far." _I liked kissing you. Please realize I liked kissing you._

"Well, that's good to know." As Laura huffed, Carmilla wanted to just scream that it's okay to do it again, and again. "But I still acted completely insane," _MY GOD_ , "and made up all of this bull shit and..." Laura groaned and flopped her head onto Carmilla's shoulder. "I made you pretend to be my girlfriend. What kind of person does that?" Carmilla's stomach tumbled. This- now would be a good time, the perfect chance right?

"I... Didn't mind that... So, much." Carmilla said, though they lacked her usual cocky emphasis. They were slow, and dragged out, searching for how Laura would react to it. 

"What do you mean?" Laura replied. _I didn't mind kissing you- I actually enjoyed it. I didn't mind holding your hand, or having you kiss my cheek, or wrapping my arm around you and calling you sweetheart. I want that to be real._ Carmilla chewed on her bottom lip as her heart started to thrash in her chest. 

"I... Um..." _I have feelings for you. I HAVE FEELINGS FOR YOU! SAY IT YOU NUMBNUT!_ But her tongue was tied, her throat was tight. Her heart was pleading for her to take the easy route and just remain silent but it also ached for her to speak the truth.

"Oh, my god." Laura said. "And I ruined your chances with Brandy. I'm a total failure of a friend." Friend. That's right. That's all they were. _That's not... What friends do_. Carmilla rested her cheek on the top of Laura's head.

"You, actually didn't. She said I could still text her, but I don't-"

"Oh thank god! I didn't ruin everything for you." Laura sighed heavily, her tiny body expanding and shrinking with the exaggerated huff. "I'm really sorry, for how I acted in there." Laura said, her tone more serious.

"No, no. Don't apologize. I get it. Hell, if it were Ell in there, I'm sure I'd be acting all kinds of crazy too."

"So, you admit I was acting crazy."

Carmilla smirked.

"Maybe a little." Carmilla said with a shrug. Laura chuckled lightly.

"I just... I know it sounds insane but she just flips something in me and I turn into this obsessive, lying, competitive freak that needs to be first in everything. And, I kinda figured, you know. Hot girl with me, why not say she's my girlfriend?" Laura sighed, and lifted her head from Carmilla's shoulder, her apologetic honey brown eyes gazing into Carmilla's. "Can I make it up to you?"

"How?" Carmilla muttered, her mind reeling. Laura pursed her lips to the side, a sly smile soon forming.

"I have an idea." _Please kiss me. Please, just kiss me_. Laura leaned forward, and for a moment, Carmilla believed she was going to kiss her, as if there was a god to answer her prayers. But, her atheism proved once again as Laura pulled back, Carmilla's phone now in captivity. 

"Uh, cupcake? What are you doing?" Carmilla said, peeking down at her screen.

"To make up for forcing you to be my pretend girlfriend, practically feeling you up, and kissing you," Laura typed a few things on the screen, "I am setting you up on a date with Brandy." Carmilla's sure if she was in some romantic comedy the whole entire audience would be face palming right now. 

"You really don't have to do that, creampuff." Carmilla said dismally. _Actually, please don't. You should take me out on a date instead._

"Too late. I sent her the text." Carmilla gave Laura a pointed look. "Oh, come on, Carmilla. She's a cute waitress." But Carmilla still gave her the look. Laura rolled her eyes and sighed. "For me?" That's all it took and all the will Carmilla had was gone. Carmilla rolled her eyes at herself, and rested her head on Laura's shoulder, staring down at the screen.

"Fine. But only because I don't want you to feel so guilty you set everything ablaze." Carmilla sat there, painfully so, as messaged passed back and forth of, what was supposed to be, Carmilla and Brandy. Carmilla was upset that Laura was doing this, sure. But at the same time, maybe it was good for her. Maybe she needed this date. Maybe she could help her get over Laura, maybe she could help her realize that Laura doesn't have feelings for her. Because if she did, why would she be so eager to set up this date? Carmilla sighed as Laura sent a flirty goodnight text to Brandy.

How will she ever suffice?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos!
> 
> Also, side note. This will probs be the second to last chapter. The last chapter is half-written and currently undermining a lot of editing, so I'll see if this is, in fact, the second to last chapter.


	25. She's Not Her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas Eve, and life's a mess.  
> Has Carmilla found the one to free her from her feelings of Laura?  
> Kirsch and Danny have problems, just like any couple does. But will this one prove to be too far?  
> Laferry is still strong af who am I kidding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this is, officially, the second to last chapter. It's a little quick paced, mind you. I didn't write much inner monologues and dialogues between characters because I wanted this chapter to be just one thing after the other and get to the point. It was just kinda touch and go. 
> 
> But, as previously stated, this is the second to last chapter. What a fucking trip. The last chapter will be out soon after this one.
> 
> Also, okay this note is getting a little too long now but I have other things to say. I didn't edit this chapter too much, because again this was touch and go and I wanted to keep that point, and when I edit I just want to add scenarios and add phrases and just throw up a bunch of words. So I apologize for any errors; this was scarcely edited.

**Danny**

 

 _ **Danny's Future Husband:** 12:30PM and I love you_  
_**Danny's Future Husband:** It's 12:31PM and I still love you_  
_**Danny's Future Husband:** 12:32PM and guess what?_  
_**Danny's Future Husband:** I STILL LOVE YOU!!_

Danny groaned, but smiled upon waking up to the annoying buzz to her phone.

_**Danny:** It's 12:33PM and I was trying to sleep. _

_**Danny's Future Husband:** Oh come on Babe! IT'S CHRISTMAS EVE!!!! Get in2 the holiday spirit!!!_

_**Danny:** Does the holiday spirit really have to be this early in the morning?_

Danny rolled her eyes, and scrolled through her other messages.

 

_**Laura:** Hey Danny! Merry Christmas eve! I'm just texting to let you know there will be a little get together at my house around 8-10 if you want to join. Let me know!_

 

 _ **Mistress of the Snark:** Xena. Laura made me text you this, so, don't think it came from the heart or anything_  
_**Mistress of the Snark:** Merry Christmas eve  
**Mistress of the Snark:** There. I said it. You better say it back or I will storm down there smacking a wooden spoon to a pot whiltst screaming Christmas carols at the top of my lungs_

 

 _ **Lafonbrains:** (1 Attachement photo)_  
_**Lafonbrains:** Merry Christmas Eve from me and Perr! Hope to see you at Laura's party!!_

 

Danny sighed, and sent back quick replies to everyone as her mind started to kick back into gears again. She stretched her long arms above her head before kicking the sheets off of herself. This would have been more peaceful if she wasn't sleeping in a measly hotel.

Yeah, things with her parents didn't go so great after the whole 'you're a heterosexual!' thing. So, she just decided to sleep at a hotel. She couldn't ask anyone to take her in because she didn't want to steal her friends' time with their families; Kirsch didn't even know she was sleeping here. She knew if any one of them found out, they'd automatically offer up hospitality, but she couldn't put them in that position. 

After her shower and getting changed, Danny hit the road. She had realized, in this time, that she didn't want to wait to be engaged to Kirsch, to keep saying "one day". She wanted to do it- and she wanted to do it soon. Like, today. Or, if you will:

Danny's going off to buy a proposal ring and is going to propose to Kirsch.

Kirsch and Danny's relationship has never been traditional in any sense. They fought over just about everything like toddlers. Kirsch was always the sensitive one, though Danny did show her vulnerable side occasionally. Their story has never really been by the book; it's just this messy, messy novel with the pages torn mixed with other pages into a literary that makes no sense. But, she loved it. And she loved him.

And now, she's going to make it official.

 

**Lafontaine**

 

"Oh come on Laf. Just one family photo!" Larry exclaimed.

"Yeah. Can't you guys stop being grossly in love for two seconds?" Perry's sister, Emily, said next. After Perry's little... Well, complete smackdown of Lafontaine's homophobic family members, their immediate family started to see how much it really affected Lafontaine, and decided they were more important than them. So, happily, their parents kicked them out and now Perry and Lafontaine's families joined together for a Christmas Eve breakfast. This is what the holidays should be like, they thought. Happy; this true happiness that bubbled in their stomach and caused a wide grin. To love each member at the family and not live in fear, to not have that weight that they did. Sure, their own family had a long way to go, but this was still the best they've ever had it. 

"Why don't you guys find someone to be grossly in love with?" Perry retorted, planting a kiss on Lafontaine's cheek.

"Oh, come on. All of these photos are just you and Perry. Can't you just get one with everyone?" Mrs. Perry said. "I want to remember _something_ of Lola that isn't Lafontaine."

"How can I do that when they're my whole world?" Perry replied, earning a gush of awe's.

"Seriously? You can't pull that on Christmas Eve. That's too cute." Emily said, letting her canon camera rest from the strap around her neck. "Now you guys promised at least one photo. As much as I love you and Lafontaine, little sis, you did promise a photo. A promise is a promise, remember?" Perry sighed, and kissed Lafontaine's cheek once more, warming their heart more than anything ever could. 

"Fine." Perry hopped off of Lafontaine's lap and their conjoined families gathered up in a line. With an excited squeal, she directed everyone into the positions she saw fit, and placed the camera on top of it's stand. "Okay everybody!" She exclaimed. "Annnnd, the buttons pressed!" She quickly squirmed her way into the line. "3... 2... 1..."

"I'M PREGNANT!" Perry shouted.

"WHAT!" The families said in unison as the camera flashed. Perry broke out into a fit of laughters.

"Just kidding!" You could practically drown in the relief that washed over everyone. "Emily please send that photo to me." Perry said. Emily rolled her eyes.

"God damn it Perry! I finally got you away from your... Partner and that's what you do? Ugh." Emily went back to the camera, giggles spread throughout the conjoined families. Of course, there'd me moments like that, that hesitation, the pause as they tried to say the correct phrase. But, it meant that they were trying. And that's better than the hell Lafontaine has put up with with their family. 

"Okay! It's pressed again!" Emily squirmed back into the group. "No one is pregnant, okay? 3... 2... 1..." In that final moment, Lafontaine dipped Perry in their arms and kissed her, taking everyone by surprise, but nonetheless a gush of 'awe's' rushing over as the camera flashed. They weren't used to doing that, to being able to be open with family during these kinds of events, since their other family members would ruin it. And now that they could, they wanted to show their love in every way that they could.

"God damn it! I said no one's pregnant! That doesn't mean to be cute!" Emily chastised as Lafontaine pulled Perry back to her feet.

"Well, at least we'll have some pretty interesting photos." Lafontaine's father said, earning a wave of humble laughter. In all honesty, this is what Lafontaine has always wanted, only with a family of their own. They want Perry and their's children to be rushing around, not being able to stay still in the family lines. As they looked at Perry, spotting her dazzling smile and beaming eyes, they knew they would one day. Maybe not today, or anytime soon, but one day they'll both have rings on their fingers, joining this family holiday with a family of their own. 

And they can't wait for that day to come. 

 

**Kirsch**

 

He couldn't believe it- he really couldn't believe it. He knows their relationship isn't perfect- he fucking knows that. But for Danny to cheat on him? That's too far. What's worse is he doesn't even know who the sleazeball is!

"Kirsch! Calm down!" Carmilla said. As soon as he got that text from Danny he called Carmilla. He wasn't sure who else to call; but she was just in his contacts and he just needed someone. "She was _just_  staying at a hotel. How do you know she's cheating?" When Danny texted Kirsch, her location services were on. And, wondering why there was a foreign address under her name, Kirsch clicked on it. Turns out; she was at a hotel. 

"If she was _just_ staying at a hotel then why wouldn't she tell me?" Kirsch said, so angry there was steam blowing out of his ears. He's never felt this angry before, so hurt, so betrayed. 

"Whelp, sometimes a girl just has to say screw it and spend a night alone at a hotel. Plus, wasn't she fighting with her family? She might have been staying there to get away from them." Carmilla tried to reason, but Kirsch was fueled off this twisted feeling of betrayal and anger that he was far beyond reason. Far beyond anything. 

"If that was the case then why didn't she tell ME!" He shouted, swinging his fist into the wall.

"Whoa okay!" Carmilla said, placing a hand on his shoulder. "We are _not_ punching walls. That is not something we are doing." Kirsch rubbed his fingers over his knuckles, now scraped, a painful twist in his muscles. But he wanted to do it again- he needed to get out this anger that ruptured deep inside of him. As he drew his arm back again, Carmilla grasped it, stopping him mid-way. "Beefcake! This is not how you handle your problems!" Carmilla exclaimed. Kirsch wasn't even breathing normally now; huffing his chest in angry blows of air. "You think punching a fucking wall will solve this? Sit your ass down." Carmilla grabbed his shoulders and forced him to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Now, say it with me; punching walls is not how we solve problems."

Kirsch grunted, but with the glare Carmilla was giving him, he was too scared to defy her.

"Punching walls is not how we solve problems." He muttered, looking down at his injured hand.

"Good. Now you guys made up after your fight, right?" Carmilla reasoned. Kirsch nodded. "Then why would she then go off and sleep with someone?" 

"Are you really in a position to give me advice on my relationship?" Kirsch snapped. He watched Carmilla flinch, and he instantly felt an ache of guilt. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He muttered. "I didn't mean to snap like that. That wasn't bro-like of me. I just-"

"No, no. You're right. I'm not." Carmilla said. "But, I have a date in an hour and-"

"With Laura?" He said hopefully. Oh, please tell him it's Laura. Carmilla shook her head.

"Er, no." Kirsch's shoulders slumped. "Laura kinda set it up with that waitress against my own will. But, Laura's little party thing is in an hour and a half, and I'll be on a date." Kirsch sighed.

"You know she probably set up that party because you're going on a date, right?" Kirsch muttered. In all honesty, he felt bad for Laura. She's always been terrible with dealing with her issues, and now knowing that Carmilla is going on a date, he started to connect the dots. Laura probably set up that party so she'd have something to focus on other than the fact that Carmilla was on a date.

"What?" Carmilla said in disbelief. He sighed. But, clearly Carmilla was still oblivious. 

"Never mind." He said. His mind was still focused on Danny. He usually puts others before himself, but now, he just didn't have the patience. "What the hell am I going to do?" He said, bringing the topic back to Danny. "I thought we loved each other, but..." 

"She does love you, Kirsch. You know that." Kirsch rubbed his face in his hands.

"I haven't even told you what the fight was about." He said. Carmilla was all ears then. She sat down on the bed next to Kirsch. "She... Well, I was there with her family, having dinner, when I accidentally told them that Danny and I were getting married one day. Then there was all this 'see! I told you you're going to end up heterosexual! I knew it was a phase!' thing. So, naturally, I tried to defend Danny, but it didn't stop. Danny flipped out on me and stormed away. And, um..." There was one thing that Kirsch was worried about that he was never really worried about before. "So," he sighed, "when we made up, she said that part of her just wanted to prove her family wrong. To just marry a girl, but she said she couldn't because she loved and wanted to be with me. And, listen. I've never been terrified that she'd cheat on me with a girl; I know that's the common fear and wronged stereotype about bisexuals. But... She said something like that and now she's at a hotel, and..." Kirsch buried his head into his hands.

"I don't know what to do, man. I just don't know what to do. I've never been this scared, never thought she'd cheat on me, but..." Kirsch sniffled. Carmilla, rather awkwardly, rubbed his back.

"Hey, sport." If Kirsch wasn't so upset that he was crying, he'd cringe at how rigid Carmilla was being. "It's gonna, be alright. Just, uh... Stop, crying." Kirsch continued to cry, and flopped his head on Carmilla's shoulder. "Whoa, okay. So that's what we're doing. Um, I'm gonna call Laura she's better with this-"

"No." Kirsch sobbed. "She'll just," another sniffle, "she'll just tell Danny and I want to do it. I want to be the one to confront her." Carmilla nodded.

"Okay, yeah. Tell me how you're gonna confront her." Carmilla said. Kirsch sniffled and lifted his head off of Carmilla's shoulder, his sobs slowly subsiding.

"I'm just gonna go up to her."

"Go up to her." Carmilla hyped. 

"Yeah. I'm gonna go up to her and, and confront her."

Carmilla jumped to her feet.

"Confront her. Fantastic. How're you gonna confront her?"

"I'm gonna, I'm gonna yell at her." Kirsch announced, straightening out his back. 

"Yeah. Yell at her. Fucking yell at her. Awesome. What are you going to say?" Carmilla said, playing some sort of hype man.

"I'm gonna say, 'hey. Fuck you." Kirsch proclaimed, slowly standing up.

" _Hey. Fuck you._ I like it. What else are you gonna say?"

Kirsch placed a hand on his hip and pointed to an imaginary Danny, feeding off of Carmilla's hype.

"I'm gonna say 'I'm breaking up with you'."

"Dump her. That'll show her. Loving it. What else?" Carmilla encouraged.

"I'm gonna tell her that she's a mean, heartless bitch." Kirsch said.

"Yeah!"

"That she's ruthless. And I hate her."

"Yeah man!" Carmilla encouraged.

"I'm gonna go right up to her and tell her that she's a no good, lying, heartless bitch who deserves to rot in hell! Who has ignored everything I've done for her! That she'll never be with me again! I'm gonna... I'm gonna..." Kirsch felt the tears come back. "I'm gonna cry!" He wrapped his hefty arms around Carmilla and started sobbing into her shoulder again. Carmilla sighed, and patted his back.

"It's okay. Just let it all out, buddy. Just let it all out."

 

**Laura**

 

Setting everything up before a party was always hectic, but that was good- that's what Laura wanted. Hectic meant distraction, meant not focusing on the fact that Carmilla was going on a date with- _nope_. Time to set out the refreshments. See? It worked so well.

Laura's dad walked out of the living room and into the kitchen, slightly out of breath from moving the Christmas tree out of the way. He placed his hands on his hips.

"All set, kiddo." He announced, proudly swiping a cracker from the neat arrangement Laura had set out.

"Dad!"

"Too late." He retorted. Laura rolled her eyes, and moved the crackers so the missing spot went unnoticed. "Hey, uh, where's Carmilla?" He asked.

"Oh she's at Kirsch's. Something about an emergency." Laura replied casually. Truth was, she didn't mind that Carmilla was there. That way, there wasn't the constant reminder that Carmilla was going on a date- _nope_ , time to dump the ice into the cooler. Laura smacked the hefty back on the ground before breaking the package open. 

"Need help?"

Laura had enough anger inside of her pointed toward herself to push through any physical labor.

"Nah. I got it." She replied. She picked the package up and dumped the ice back, careful to not let it overflow.

"Can I talk to you about something?" He asked, plopping down on one of the chairs. Once the bag was empty, Laura dusted her hands off and placed them on her hips.

"Sure dad. What's up?" 

He sighed, and pursed his lips to the side, thinking over it for a moment. 

"Are you and Carmilla together?" He asked.

"What? No." Laura replied quickly. "No, no. We're just... Friends." Laura's going to have to keep telling herself that no matter how painful it was. If she's being honest, the only reason that Laura set Carmilla up on that date was because she thought if maybe she saw her with someone else, that she'd get over her. If Carmilla was in a relationship they couldn't kiss, or touch, and Laura couldn't have feelings for her. As much as it upset her, it was for the best.

"Are you sure? You can tell me, you know." But, it was different in the way he said it. It wasn't him being friendly or curious; he was desperate almost, like he was trying to grasp something that was slipping away.

"Yeah. I know." Laura comforted as she plopped down on one of the chairs. "Why?" He sighed, and started fiddling with his fingers.

"You always tell me everything. And, I know you're lying about something about Carmilla." Laura nearly cringed, seeing the hurt painted across his expression and the pain in his tone. She hasn't been honest; she's guilty of that. "You can't look me in the eye and tell me there isn't something going on with you and Carmilla." 

Laura sighed. If there was anyone she could talk about this with, it was her dad. And when the brown eyes, replicated of her own hue looked at her, she couldn't resist. It was time to be honest with him. Maybe if she was, she could get over Carmilla. 

"There is something... Well, there _was_ something, but..." Laura shrugged dismally. "Now it's one sided."

"What do you mean?" Her dad asked. Laura sighed once more, and leaned back in her chair.

"I guess I'll start from when we were kids, then." 

For the next 20 minutes, Laura told her father the things she never did. She told him of their first kiss at that sleepover, to where they both said they liked girls, to Carmilla's last night under the fireworks where they admitted their feelings and kissed goodbye. She told him of that first night where they reconnected, how magical it was. She told him of the events that followed, the months that passed, the confusing moments that made Laura wonder what they were, to where she knew where she stood and ran away. She told him of it all up until now. He listened intently, every word until Laura finished it off.

"And... Now we're here. I set Carmilla up on a date and am throwing a party to get over it like a sorry loser." Laura said with a sigh. 

"You really think she doesn't have any feelings for you?" Her father replied.

"As much as I'd like to believe she does, no. I don't." Laura slumped in her chair. He sighed, and clasped his hands together.

"That's because you don't see the way she looks at you." He muttered. Laura knit her brows.

"What do you mean?" 

"Jesus. You really are oblivious." 

"Hey!"

"I'm just saying. Do you really think that she doesn't have any feelings for you?" He said. Laura stayed silent, because she did. "She does, Laura. She really does." Laura sighed.

"Well, it's too late now. In 30 minutes Carmilla will be on a date with Brandy, so it doesn't matter." Laura still denied that Carmilla had any feelings. If she did, why would she go on a date wit her? Her father was next to sigh.

"You really dug your own grave there, sweetheart." He stood up and kissed the top of her head. "She'll come around. If she doesn't, then your both idiots." Laura smiled.

"Great pep talk dad." 

"Hey. I'm just spilling the truth here. Why don't you set up the rest of the coolers and I'll set up the rest of the displays, yeah?" 

Laura nodded.

"Yeah. I'd like that."

 

**Danny**

 

Laura's jaw nearly hit the floor like a dropped anvil, her eyes wide. Danny came to the party 10 minutes early to tell Laura she was going to propose. She just dropped the news, and now Laura looks like her eyes might just pop out of her head.

"Oh my gosh!" Laura exclaimed. "Danny! That's awesome!" Danny couldn't stop her smile.

"I know. I, um. I just want it to be perfect, you know? And I wanted to check if it was okay with you."

"Of course it is!" Laura grabbed Danny's arms in an excited manner. She squealed and jumped. "Oh my gosh! You're going to propose to Kirsch!"

"Shhh." Danny said. "Not so loud. He lives right next to you; he could hear you." They were sitting in Laura's room, but even then she knows just how loud Laura can get. 

"Right, right. Sorry, sorry. I'm just- I'm so excited! Gahh!"

Danny rolled her eyes, though she couldn't help but feel excited herself.

"So, will you help me?" 

"Yes! Of course! Um," Laura tucked a strand of her bronze hair behind her ear, "what do you want me to do?" 

 

**Kirsch**

 

"Don't you have a date to go to?" He lamented as Carmilla walked him the short distance to the Hollis home. 

"I do." Carmilla replied. "But, I have 10 minutes till I go and I wanted to make sure that you actually haul your ass over here." Kirsch rolled his eyes. After his little breakdown, they had a small talk. Mainly just her telling Kirsch that he had to talk it out, which is really ironic considering her situation with Laura. But, nonetheless, she was right. Tonight, however, he wasn't going to do it. He didn't want to ruin Laura's little party or whatever the hell it was. So, tonight, he was going to put on a fake smile, laugh, and talk to her about it after. 

He just needs to control his anger.

"Hey, at least you're actually invited." Carmilla said after his silence.

"I'm sure if you cancelled your date Laura would want you to come." He retorted. Carmilla sighed.

"She's the one that set it up. If I cancelled I'm sure I'd get an earful." 

He sighed.

"Yeah. Whatever."

This night was going to be the most hellish Christmas Eve ever.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla stood patiently outside of the restaurant Brandy works at, watching as people passed with happy smiles. Why the fuck are they happy? Who the hell is happy on this god forsaken holiday? _I wonder how Laura's doing. Is she happy right now? Maybe I should text her and-_

"Hey." The familiar cool voice greeted. Carmilla eyed Brandy up and down. She was wearing ripped black skinny jeans, vans, and a grey hoodie. Carmilla looked down at herself. Was Carmilla too dressed up? She wore a light blue button down shirt, leather pants, and a black tie. "Ready to go?" Brandy said, snapping her gaze back to Brandy. Carmilla wasn't used to seeing Brandy in anything other than that all-black outfit and her waitress apron, so this was different. She looked cuter, but even then, her mind still went to the girl back at her home. Carmilla shook it off and smiled.

"Ready." Carmilla replied. Brandy smiled and hooked her arm in Carmilla's. It didn't fit perfectly in hers like La- _nope. Not thinking about her._ "So what do you want to do?" She asked as they walked around the plaza.

"You were the one that set up the date. You chose."

Carmilla smiled, and looked to the dangling Christmas lights above.

"Well, walking around the mall arm in arm isn't an official date in my book." She said, dragging her gaze back to Brandy. 

"Really? This isn't your thing?" She teased. Carmilla rolled her eyes. 

"This is a type of date I would've gone on when I was 13."

Brandy chuckled.

"Well, how old are you now?"

"20. You?"

"19." 19. Laura's 19. Laura also- _no. Not doing that._ "So let's go on a teenage date then. Christmas Eve, why not?" Carmilla smiled.

"So, why'd you agree to a date on Christmas Eve? I hate the holiday, so I was more than glad to escape the Christmas spirit, but what's your excuse?"

"Jewish." 

"Ah." Carmilla replied. Isn't Laura half-Jewish or something? Carmilla shook her head to herself. _No- stop thinking about her._

This was going to be a long date if Carmilla didn't learn to shove Laura out of her thoughts.

 

**Laura**

 

This was going to go terribly if Laura didn't learn to shove Carmilla out of her thoughts. They were about 30 minutes into the gathering. So far, so good. Families chatting, children playing about. Danny's family didn't come- obviously. But the other families were there, and thus far the party seemed to be a success. Kirsch was currently in an intense go-fish game with his 7 year old brother Brandon, Lafontaine and Perry were chatting with Emily and Larry, the adults were all drinking boxed wine and having some sort of chat, and Laura and Danny were standing in the back room next to the stairs, preparing Danny to propose.

"Do I look okay?" Danny asked. Laura smiled.

"You look great, Danny." Laura comforted, giving a comforting rub of her arms. "Now, recite what you're going to say to me." Danny nodded, and cleared her throat. She straightened out her back.

"Kirsch, you are the sweetest guy I've ever met. Sure, you can be an idiot sometimes, but your heart is always in the right place. You always see the good in others, and that's something that's hard to find these days. There isn't anyone else like you, and there is no one I'd rather be with. So, marry me?" Laura smiled.

"Right, just. Maybe show a little more emotion." Laura suggested. Danny nodded.

"Right, yeah. I'll do that." Danny huffed. "Okay- I think I'm ready."

Laura squealed.

"Oh my gosh! You're gonna propose!" Laura couldn't help it as she pulled Danny into a hug. Danny laughed and wrapped her lanky arms around Laura. As they pulled back, Laura squealed again.

"Show time." Danny said.

 

**Kirsch**

 

He couldn't help but feel an anger rise in him as Laura and Danny re-entered the room. Where'd they go? And why were they gone? Did Danny cheat on him with Laura? Kirsch shook his head. No, no _Laura_ wouldn't do that. Laura's loyal. He clenched his jaw. What were they talking about anyway? And why does Danny look so nervous? Oh god, did she just tell Laura that she cheated on him? Does Laura know who? 

"Excuse me little bro." He said, ruffling his brother's hair and jumping to his feet. Kirsch tapped Laura's shoulder as Danny walked into the kitchen, taking a sip of some beverage.

"Oh! Hey Kirsch." Laura greeted.

"What were you guys talking about?" He asked. 

"Oh." She muttered. "I, uh... I can't, exactly, tell you." Laura said. Kirsch shifted his jaw side to side. 

"I knew it." He growled. "I fucking new it. Did she tell you who?"

"What? Who what?" 

He balled his hands into fists.

"Of course she told you. She's going to tell everyone but me." 

"Kirsch what are you-"

"That's it." Kirsch wasn't going to sit around and look like an idiot. He's not going to wait for her to tell him- he's going to confront her about it. Here and now. He doesn't care who listens because everyone should know she betrayed him after years of being together when he's never even so much as thought of doing such. 

He stormed up to her, crossing through the section of adults. She turned around and jumped. Guilty- she is guilty of something and it's this. 

"Hey. _Danny_." He said, crossing his arms.

"Oh. Um, hey Kirsch." She greeted, her eyes darting around. "Can I talk to you real quick?" She's going to admit this now?

"Sure. But I'm not going anywhere." If she's going to admit it, it's going to be in front of everyone. With all ears.

"I never asked you to-"

"Not going anywhere." He snapped back. A confused expression painted across her face.

"Um... Are you-"

"Okay? Absolutely. Tell me what you were going to say." Kirsch wasn't sure if he was ready. His heart was heavy, his blood boiled. He felt like he was going to throw up; this sickened him.

"Um, alright. I didn't want to do this in the kitchen, but seeing as I don't have a choice." Danny smiled, and set down her drink. She's smiling- why the hell was she smiling? "So, Kirsch." Here it comes. Here it comes. "You are the sweetest guy I've ever met." What? SJ said the same thing when she broke up with him. Danny's breaking up with him? No no- he's going to dump her before she has the chance.

"Oh no. No no no." He said, taking a step back. Danny seemed stunned. _That's right- I know_. "Why the hell were you at a hotel?" He said loudly, gathering the attention of the room. Danny's eyes went wide.

"What?"

"When you texted me this morning, your location services were on. So, I'll say it again. Why the hell were you in a hotel?"

Danny's eyes darted around the room, all eyes now on the troubled couple.

"Can we not talk about this here?" Danny muttered, grabbing his arm. Kirsch shook her grip off.

"No? You know what? No! We're talking about this here! Why were you at a hotel?" The house was dead silent now, his voice seeming to echo. Or maybe it was in his head. He felt so sickened by this that he doesn't know what's reality anymore.

"I- I-"

"No." He cut off. "You know what? I don't want to hear it. I know what happened."

"Kirsch I-"

"Years of being loyal, and this is what I get in return. Years of loving you with all of my heart, and this, this is what happens."

"Kirsch-"

"3 years Danny. We've been together for 3. Fucking. Years. And this is how you treat me? Like I'm someone replaceable!"

"Kirsch I-"

"And now you're going to dump me?"

"Kirsch."

"After all these years. After all these fucking years, you-"

"KIRSCH!" Danny shouted, shutting him up instantly. Suddenly, she pulled out a black box. "I slept at a hotel because of my parents. I didn't want anyone to fucking know, or to worry. Okay? I wasn't going to dump you; I was going to ask you to marry me." She threw the box at him. He caught it in his hands. What? Marry him? "I can't believe you'd think I'd fucking do that." She said, her voice cracking. Danny ran off, Laura chasing her up the stairs after giving Kirsch a look. 

He was left with the glares and bewildered gazes from the families. He deserved them though; he just acted like a complete jerk, and Danny... He looked down at the box. She was going to marry him. She was going to ask him to marry her, and he just fucked that up. He fucks everything up. Kirsch closed his eyes.

God damn it. Can he ever do anything right?

 

**Laura**

 

She's never seen Danny this torn; this upset. She's never one to cry like this; she's always so strong. It's moments like this that remind Laura that Danny's just like everyone else and not always this strong, independent being. It's always with Kirsch that she shows this side of herself, vulnerable and sensitive. He can only ever get her like this.

"I just... I can't believe he'd think that of me! I can't believe it!" Danny said with her sobs, running a hand through her hair. Laura rubbed her back in an attempt to soothe her.

"I know, Danny. I know." Laura said. "He's a big jerk."

"Damn right he is! And to say that in front of all those people... He was never the jealous type. He was never the type to bring other people into our problems. I don't understand. Why now? Why believe I'd do that?" Danny lamented. Seeing Danny upset had to be one of the most heartbreaking sights in the world; especially with how strong she always seems. "Do you think... Do you think he cheated on me?" Laura shook her head.

"Now you're being ridiculous. He'd never do that, Danny. That's just your insecurities talking." Danny rested her head on Laura's shoulder. "Look, I know this sucks but... It'll pass. You and Kirsch will make up like you always do, yeah?" Laura said hopefully. Danny shook her head.

"I don't know if I can forgive him for this one, Laura." Danny whispered. Not good- definitely not good.

"You say that now, but... Okay, let's say you're the one who got that text. You find out Kirsch stayed at a hotel, and he didn't tell you. How would you feel?"

"If I knew he was having troubles with his family, which he just made me fucking admit in front of everyone, I'd know he didn't cheat on me."

Laura cringed. Okay- bad approach on that one. Laura sighed.

"You set up your fucking girlfriend on a date with another girl. Who are you to give advice?" Danny snarled. Laura winced. She's trying to forget about her, and she knows Danny's just angry but, she did have a point. Minus the girlfriend part. For the sake of it, Laura decided to just let her take it out on her.

"What do you mean?" Laura said reluctantly, faking obliviousness.

"I mean you and Carmilla both fucking like each other and you set her up on a date. Who the hell does that?"

"Well, Carmilla doesn't have any-"

"YOU IDIOT!" Danny shouted, taking Laura by surprise. Danny hopped to her feet. "Do you seriously believe that Carmilla doesn't have any feelings for you? Do you honestly believe that?" Though still stunned, Laura shook her head. "My god, you're a bigger idiot than Kirsch!"

"Danny, this is just your upset talk. You're emotionally unstable and-"

"No! If I was having the best fucking day of my life, if Kirsch agreed to marry me and everything went smoothly I'd still know that Carmilla has feelings for you. My god, Laura. It's obvious. I know it, Lafontaine knows it, Perry knows it, hell, even _Kirsch_ knows it. And now she's on a date and you... You're probably heart broken. Oh god, and I'm yelling at you." Danny sniffled and plopped back down next to Laura. "I'm sorry."

"No, it's okay. I-"

Both of them froze at the knock on the door.

"It's Kirsch. Can I come in?" A muffled voice sounded. Laura looked to Danny for approval. She clenched her hands into tight fists, but nodded. 

"Come in." Laura called. The door slowly creaked open, and in came Kirsch with an apologetic expression.

"Uh, hey."

"Hey." Danny said dismally. Laura looked between the two.

"I'm gonna go-"

"No." Danny said, grabbing her arm. "Stay." Oh, yikes. Yikes yikes yikes yikes. From what Laura has known, being there during fights between any two people, she's always asked to pick a side. She hated doing that, but if Danny wanted her to stay, she will.

"What do you want, Kirsch?" Laura said. He didn't just deal with this fiasco of tears; just because she has to stay doesn't mean she's going to play nice. 

"I, um. Danny can I talk to you?"

"Since you wanted to make this public, no. Whatever you have to say Laura's going to hear it." Danny snapped back. He cringed, but nodded. Kirsch took a deep breath and shoved his hands in his pocket.

"I am so, so, so, so, so, so so _so_ sorry. I just... I was worried, okay? And yes, I acted like a jerk- I am a jerk. But, you said that you just wanted to marry a girl as a big fuck you to your parents, and then I saw you were at a hotel and you didn't tell me, and I just... I got so worried, man. I know, I'm an idiot. I acted like a jerk, I am a jerk, I acted like an idiot and I am an idiot. And if you break up with me, I wouldn't be surprised. Hell, I'm surprised you haven't broken up with me after all these years. And, god Danny. I love you. I love you so much, and if you say no I'd understand but," Laura's jaw dropped as Kirsch got down on one knee, pulling out the box and opening it to reveal a ring, "will you marry me?" With tears in her eyes, Danny shook her head.

"No." She said. Laura turned her head in shock, watching as Kirsch's expression dropped. He sighed heavily.

"It's okay, I-"

"I bought the fucking ring. I'm proposing." Danny said, surprising them both by sliding off the bed and joining Kirsch on the floor. She kneeled on one knee in front of Kirsch. Danny took the box back, taking everyone by surprise once more. "Kirsch, you fucked up. You fucked up big time, but even still, I forgive you. Our relationship isn't perfect; far from it. It's messy, and a little bit fucked up but..." She smiled. "I wouldn't have it any other way. So, Wilson Kirsch; will you marry me?" Kirsch smiled wide, and nodded.

"Of course I will!" Danny broke out into a teary smile and slid the ring on his finger. They broke out into chuckles. "Oh, come here!" He wrapped his arms around her and she wrapped hers around him, hugging each other in tears while kneeling on the floor. Laura smiled, happy she could watch this interaction. As an after thought, Laura quickly whipped out her phone and stealthily snapped a picture. She'll have to send that to Danny.

"I love you." Danny whispered, completely swelling Laura's heart.

"I love you too." Kirsch replied, kissing her temple. Laura's hand clutched her chest.

"God damn it. Now I'm gettin' the feels." Laura muttered. Kirsch and Danny broke out into happy laughter. Laura watched with a wide smile, happy that her friends had figured it out. She sighed with content. 

At least they're happy.

 

**Carmilla**

 

"Most embarrassing story. Go." Brandy said. They moved the date to Carmilla's car as the mall had closed early. They sat in the back seats, cross-legged and facing each other. Carmilla smiled, and tapped her chin. So far, the date was going well- surprisingly well. They got along great, but- no. Not thinking about her.

"I don't know. I don't really embarrass myself that often." Carmilla replied.

"Oh come on. There has to be something embarrassing you've done." 

Carmilla shook her head.

"I have no shame." Carmilla retorted. Brandy rolled her eyes. "What about you? What's the most embarrassing thing you've done?" Brandy hummed, and thought about it for a moment.

"Oh. Third grade. I used to be chubby- like extremely so. And my elementary school used to have these, like, wooden chairs, and one day I sat in one and it... Broke." Carmilla's jaw dropped as laughter soon spilled, filling the car. She gripped her stomach at the thought. "Hey! It's not that funny." Brandy teased.

"Oh my gosh. Yes it is!" Carmilla retorted past her laughter.

"That was very traumatizing." Brandy retaliated, though she still carried a smile. 

"I can picture it! I can picture a little chubby Brandy sitting down and breaking a chair." Carmilla exclaimed. Brandy broke out into giggles.

"Yeah, it was pretty funny." Brandy said.

"Did you get splinters in your ass?"

"Carmilla!" Brandy whacked Carmilla on the arm as their laughter subsided. Carmilla wiped away the tears pricking at the corner of her eyes.

"Oh man. Now _that's_ embarrassing." 

"Ohh yeah. They made a special chair for me and everything. It was terrible." Brandy said. Carmilla chuckled lightly and shook her head. 

"So you didn't grow up here, I'm guessing?" Carmilla asked. Brandy shook her head.

"Nah. I grew up a couple towns over. I moved here with my ex but," she shrugged, "it didn't work out. Turns out, she's living in France and working her dream job with her hot british girlfriend."

"And you?"

Brandy shrugged.

"I'm working at two restaurants and share an apartment with 3 people." Brandy said. "But, I did manage to snag a date with a hot girl, so I guess I'm doing okay." Carmilla smiled.

"Really? With who?" Carmilla teased, feigning cluelessness. Brandy rolled her eyes and playfully shoved Carmilla's shoulder.

"With a sarcastic asshole." Brandy retorted. Carmilla chuckled. "Though, she does look really good with a tie." Brandy took the tie between her fingers and thumb, slowly rubbing down it. Abruptly, Brandy gave it a tug and pressed their lips together. Carmilla was taken aback, but placed her hands on Brandy's hips.

"Making out in a car?" Carmilla said between kisses. "That definitely adds to this being a teenage date." Brandy hummed in response.

"Oh I intend to do a lot more than making out." She said, her voice low. Brandy clasped her arms around Carmilla's neck. Carmilla's eyes went wide for a moment, but she found that voice screaming in the back of her mind. She shut it out, trying to focus on Brandy. Her heart squeezed as honey brown eyes flashed through her mind. No- shut her out. Brandy climbed on top of Carmilla's lap, swinging her legs to the side. _Why can't I get into this? Why does this just feel wrong?_  

With one arm around Carmilla's shoulders, Brandy used her other hand to start unbuttoning Carmilla's shirt. Carmilla wanted to stop- this just felt weird. Weird somehow. Wrong. It didn't feel right. Her body wasn't responding as it should. _Laura_. Carmilla forced her out of her mind as the third button popped. _Laura_. Another button. _Laura. God, get out of my mind!_ Carmilla tackled Brandy down, causing her to squeal, but their lips still danced this terrible dance that Carmilla just wanted to stop. 

It was painful; but the pain wasn't anywhere but in her heart. _Laura._ Carmilla grabbed the buttons to Brandy's jeans. _Laura_. She fiddled with them, finally popping the button open. _Laura_. Brandy started to unbutton Carmilla's shirt again, slowly popping open each one. _Laura. Laura Laura Laura_. Carmilla couldn't go through with this- she knows she can't.

"Wait, wait." Carmilla said, breaking away. Brandy groaned.

"It's Laura, isn't it?" Brandy said. Shamefully, Carmilla nodded. She sighed, and Carmilla leaned back. Both of them started to reconfigure their clothes.

"I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. I like you- I really like you but I just..." 

"I know. It's okay." Brandy sighed. "I could tell she was on your mind this whole night." Carmilla draped her head, re-doing the buttons to her shirt. "I finally meet someone I'm interested in and she's in love with someone else." Love? 

"What? I don't-"

"Yes you do. We'd be banging right now if you didn't." Brandy sighed, and opened the car door.

"Let me walk you to your car." Carmilla insisted, following her suit. 

"Don't bother." Brandy insisted as they both clambered out. "Look, you obviously love her. She obviously loves you. You need to go be with her." Carmilla sighed.

"Are you sure? It's just a short distance and-"

"Carmilla. Go get your girl." Brandy said. Carmilla still stood. She wasn't sure. If she just kept going, if she just continued, she could get into it. She could keep seeing Brandy. She'd get over her eventually, right? "I'm not her, Carmilla." Brandy said in an exasperated tone, flopping her arms down on her sides. "I'm not the girl you want, Carmilla. Deep down you gotta know that." And Carmilla did. She knows. She doesn't want it to be true, but tonight... Tonight she knows. The reason she couldn't get into this was because she's not her; she's not Laura.

"Seriously. You better go tell her you love her, because this is the second time now."

Carmilla gave a tight smile.

"Thanks. And I'm-" 

Brandy held up her hand.

"If you say you're sorry one more time I'm going to highjack your car." Carmilla shut up instantly, but smiled. "Go on, then. Go get your girl, Carmilla." 

Carmilla nodded. Brandy turned around and wriggled her fingers in a goodbye, walking through the parking lot and to her car. Carmilla checked her watch. 

**10:30PM**

She could maybe still make that party if no one was home yet, right? She didn't want to waste any time thinking about it. Carmilla clambered into the driver's seat of her car and roared the engine to life, without wanting to waste anymore time, Carmilla took off out of the parking lot. As she drove down the streets, Carmilla realized why it just wasn't working for her, why she could never shake Laura from her mind during this night.

Brandy's not the girl with honey brown eyes and caramel-colored hair. She's not the girl with a gentle gaze, with soft lips, with hyper motivation and extreme curiosity. She's not the girl who can bring her world together with just by simply holding her hand and saying the sweetest words. She's not the girl who's smile was so bright it could fill the darkest of voids and melt the coldest of hearts.

She's not Laura, the girl she's loved since the day they met.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos!  
> Again, the last chapter will be out soon after this one since it kind of ended on a cliff hanger. Maybe a couple hours later or maybe a day- I've no clue however. I'm writing this from the past so I'll see when I post it.


	26. Some Things Never Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the end, were they destined to be together at all?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... This is the laster chapter. Ever. Boy oh boy. I'll get more sentimental at the end notes though. But I'll still say here: thank you for all the support! And, for the final time on this story, I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Without further ado, the final chapter.

**Laura**

 

Laura's slumber was cut short when the doorbell went off, the annoying chime bouncing through the walls of her house in an earsplitting sound. Laura sluggishly opened her eyes and checked the time. _What the... Who the hell is ringing the doorbell at 11:00PM? And on Christmas Eve? The hell is that shit?_

With a groan, Laura lugged herself out of bed, her mind slowly starting to wake up. _This better not be Christmas Carolers because I am not in the mood_. Laura yawned and stretched her arms above her head as she trudged down the stairs. Whoever was at the door knocked on it heavily. Laura rolled her eyes.

"Yeah yeah, I'm coming. I'm coming." She muttered to herself. Laura wiped the sleepiness out of her eyes before she yanked the door opened, but was surprised when she saw Carmilla standing there, her hands in her leather pants' pockets, a small smirk on her face.

"Oh. Hey Carmilla." Laura greeted. "I thought you were staying the night at Brandy's or whatever?" Laura said, leaning against the doorframe. That, she wasn't too happy about. When Carmilla didn't show up, she just assumed that the date had took... _T_ _hat_ turn, and so she stuffed her face with Christmas cookies whilst watching sappy rom-coms until she fell asleep. Carmilla shrugged.

"Yeah, it didn't go so well." Carmilla replied. Laura eyed Carmilla up and down. She was wearing a light blue button up shirt, a black tie, her infamous leather pants and combat boots. If Brandy dumped her, she must be out of her mind because Carmilla looked amazing. Laura cocked her head to the side.

"How come?" She asked. 

"Eh, we just..." Carmilla shrugged. "Didn't click." She seemed happy about it; not as bothered as she should. It confused Laura sure, but there was still an excitement bubbling in her stomach over the news.

"Oh." Laura muttered, though she was ecstatic. 

"Yeah." Carmilla replied. There was a brief passing of silence as they locked eyes, her gaze soft. " _But_ , I'm still dressed and it's only 11:00. Walk with me?" There was something different about her this night, something different in her eyes and the way she smirked. She seemed calmer; like a peace had washed over her, a sudden revelation that Laura wanted to find out. Laura nodded.

"Sure. Just, uh, let me get dressed into something more... Warm?" Laura asked, standing in a tank top and shorts. Carmilla chuckled, and nodded.

"I'll be waiting." 

Laura gave her a tight nod before rushing up the stairs. What was different in Carmilla? In the way she spoke, in the way she stared, in the way she smirked and the way she stood. And why was Laura's heart beating this way? Thoughts ran through her mind as she started to get changed. Maybe it had to do with Brandy, or maybe it was because it was the dawning of Christmas. But there was something different in her dark eyes. They didn't have that usual sharpness, that usual piercing gaze; they were soft, enlightened almost. 

A heavy black hoodie draped onto her torso and her teal skinny jeans hugged her legs. Laura sped down the stairs and made it to her front door in record time, Carmilla standing there with that same soft smirk she had before.

"Hey creampuff." Carmilla greeted in her raspy voice as Laura shut the door behind her, welcomed by the cool winter air.

"Hey." Laura greeted. "Shall we go?" 

"Yeah." 

The two started walking down the streets in silence. It was dark out, the moon almost full and shining bright, the kaleidoscope of stars kissing the night sky in intricate patterns. The roads were lit by the occasional street lamp, light snow covering the unplowed yards and dropping from the rooftops. The occasional gust of wind hushed in whispers, though they nipped at Laura's cheeks and her nose. Laura eyed Carmilla out of her peripheral, though Carmilla's gaze was already trained on Laura. What was different with her tonight? 

"So, Danny proposed to Kirsch." Laura decided to say as Carmilla turned down a road. She smiled, and gazed at Laura with that unfathomable look that she just couldn't comprehend.

"Oh yeah? What'd the doofus say?" 

"Well, he said yes, obviously. But it was a little hectic beforehand." Laura replied. 

"Really? How come?" 

Laura sighed, and explained the crazy events of the night. Carmilla chuckled, but said she was happy for the two nonetheless.

"We all knew they were going to get married." Carmilla said. "Now, it's just sitting and waiting for the ginger twins." Laura chuckled, and shook her head to herself.

"Perry hates it when you call them that." 

Carmilla simply shrugged.

"She hates everything I do. That's how we work. She hates something I do, I shrug it off and call her Curly Sue. One of those hate/love friendships, y'know?" 

Laura once more shook her head to herself and rolled her eyes. 

"So, where are we going anyway?" Laura asked, the mindless wandering becoming apparent. 

"Dunno. I just wanted to go on a walk with you." 

Laura couldn't stop the wide smile that spread across her cheeks. She bowed her head and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"So what faltered with Brandy?" She asked. She doesn't understand how they didn't click; they hit it off from the moment they met. Not that she was complaining.

"She just... Wasn't her." 

Laura cocked an eyebrow.

"What do you mean by that?" 

Carmilla shrugged, her gaze fixating to the night sky. 

"Not the person I'm interested in." She muttered. Not the person she's interested in? Laura couldn't stop thinking about what Danny said to her, what her father said to her, that Carmilla has feelings for her. Laura looked at Carmilla, sharing a smile with her. Was Laura the person she's interested in? Laura was going to find out.

"Hey, if we turn here, we'll be back down the road to my house." Laura said, pointing down the street. Carmilla cocked her head and quirked an eyebrow.

"And?" 

"And if we do that..." Laura said, taking Carmilla's tie and walking backwards down the street. "We can go to our spot." Carmilla's jaw dropped though a smile still remained.

"Oh my gosh! I forgot about that place." 

Laura nodded.

"Mhm." 

Carmilla smiled.

"Well, lead the way cupcake."

Laura giggled, and the two started walking the ways down the street hand-in-hand. 

 

**Carmilla**

 

Carmilla pulled Laura through the woods across from her house, vaguely remembering the pathway to the small field with the wooden treehouse. It had been so long, so many years ago since she traveled through, since she sat with Laura what was known as their spot. It seemed like centuries ago; but it had scarcely been a decade.

"It's been ages since I've been here." Carmilla murmured as she ducked under a branch. It all changed, a bit. In the way the trees had grown, the blanket of snow covering the ground, causing the droop to the branches as they carried it's weight, the darkness of night shadowing the area like a cloak. 

"Me too. I haven't been here since you left." Laura said, taking a large step over a thorn bush. Carmilla cocked her head to the side.

"Why not?" 

Laura shrugged.

"It just..." She sighed. "Wasn't the same." 

Carmilla knows she shouldn't have been, but a wide smile spread across her cheeks.

"Did you miss me?" Carmilla teased. Laura flashed her a look, one full of pain.

"Like someone cut a hole in me." She said, her voice so quiet it was nearly a whisper. Carmilla's smile was wiped clean off her face at the dismal response, but... She couldn't say the same wasn't true for herself. Carmilla interlaced their fingers.

"I missed you too, you know. Everyday." Carmilla murmured, all humor she once carried in her voice gone. Laura pushed up a branch for Carmilla to pass through.

"Well, we don't have to worry about that now. Now, we have each other." She said with a soft smile, and Carmilla couldn't help herself as she smiled back. They gazed at each other for a moment, the world seeming to stop for a passing for time, before Carmilla clambered under the branch and into the opening. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw dark figures in the field.

"Holy- what the hell are those?" Carmilla whispered harshly, cowering behind Laura. She released Laura's hand in favor of moving completely behind her, gripping her shoulder in fear. Laura simply chuckled.

"They're deer, Carmilla. Look." Laura murmured, her voice soft. _Deer?_ Carmilla peeked her head over Laura's shoulder, and saw them; three deer, two adult males and an adult female. Their coats glistened in the moonlight, making tracks across the white snow with each soft step, their beady black eyes on alert, holding themselves with grace and integrity. 

"What the hell? Why are they out here?" Carmilla murmured.

"It's their home. We're the ones that shouldn't be out here." Laura reminded her, flashing her a small smile. 

Carmilla's heart picked up as Laura took a step back and wrapped her arm around Carmilla's waist, staring in awe at the animals that Carmilla found terrifying. Their eyes were black, searching for any sign of danger as they cleared the snow with their hooves, picking at the grass with their long muzzles. Even with the sight, Carmilla couldn't draw her gaze away from Laura. Her eyes shone; beautifully so, the honey brown hue carrying flecks of bronze. A small smile played on her lips, the slithers of moonlight that escaped through the trees kissing her skin, her cheeks pink from the winter weather and bite of the wind. Carmilla couldn't help herself as she started tucking strands of Laura's hair behind her ear. Laura turned her head and gazed at Carmilla, gently, like she was trying to figure her out, though a smile still played on her lips. 

"What are you doing?" Laura whispered. Carmilla shrugged.

"I wanted to see more of your face." Carmilla retorted.

"You do realize there's a rare sight right in front of us, right?" Laura said. Again, Carmilla shrugged, continuing to tuck her caramel colored hair behind her ear as she was the most precious of beings to ever exist.

"I'd rather look at you." Carmilla's heart pounded again. "I'd rather I look at you all day if I could." Laura gaze softened, her smile widening, though it wasn't some large grin or one you'd share over a good laugh. It was gentle, with a twist of something that Carmilla's couldn't quite grasp. Butterflies invaded her stomach, and for a moment, she considered kissing her. As she took a step to do exactly that a branch snapped under her footing, and the deers immediately took off, a stampede sounding in the distance that snapped Laura and Carmilla out of the blissful daze. Laura jumped at the sound, the deers rushing into some part of the forest in a panic. Laura smiled, and slipped her hand off of Carmilla's waist in favor of intertwining it with Carmilla's hand.

"Come on. To our spot we go." Laura said. Carmilla grinned as they started trudging on light feet through the field. It was different now. The miniature tree house blanketed in snow, icicles hanging off the triangular roof, the wood seeming to be a tad more rotten. It had aged; for sure, but it still held that mystery and captivating beauty as she remembered. As they approached the structure, Carmilla could see the ladder on the tree was still there; dingy now, this too had aged as though the wood from the ladder and the wood from the treehouse were in sync. Laura leaned back against the tree and clasped her hands together.

"What are you doing?" Carmilla asked with a smile.

"I'm gonna lift you in." Laura retorted. Carmilla cocked an eyebrow.

"Are you strong enough?"

"I literally gave you a piggy back like a little over a week ago."

Carmilla shrugged.

"Fair enough." Carmilla placed her foot in Laura's clasped hands and gripped her shoulders. She was surprised when Laura easily hefted her into the treehouse. Once inside, Carmilla turned around and tugged Laura in by her forearms. They had grown far too big to stand in the small structure; having to bend over and duck inside, but they were still small enough to fit. Carmilla plopped down on the floor and rested her back against the wall, legs almost to long for her to keep stretched out, Laura following suit. Laura sat next to Carmilla, tightly tucked into her side. 

"It's been so long since I've been in here." Carmilla muttered, her eyes still trained on Laura. Laura smiled, and hooked her arm into Carmilla's. 

"Me too." Laura leaned her head back against the wall, making a quiet thud. "How did we even find this place as kids? It's in the middle of nowhere." As their eyes met, the world fit back into place. Carmilla shrugged, finding herself at a loss for words. How does she always manage to look so beautiful? "Can I ask you something?" Laura muttered, her tone serious but that gentle smile still danced across her lips. 

"Do what you will." Carmilla replied, resting her own head back against the wall. Laura pursed her lips to the side for a moment.

"What did you mean... When you said Brandy wasn't the one you're interested in?" 

Carmilla's heart kicked into an uneven rhythm, pounding in her chest like a fist to a door. Her words caught in her throat, choking on the words she's wanted to say. But, Carmilla refused. She wasn't going to let this fear take over like it always has, to let it trample over this in the moments where she could have been with Laura. Carmilla smiled, and started tucking strands of Laura's hair behind her ear. 

"I'm... Interested in someone else." God damn it; that's not good enough. Why can't Carmilla just say it? This girl has held her heart captive for so long, and now she's here and she can't spill the words? Laura pursed her lips to the side again, and turned her body to face her, tucking one leg under herself. 

"What do you mean by that?" Laura asked. Carmilla swallowed past the cluster of words forming in her throat.

"Like... Who?" Carmilla clarified. Laura nodded, slow, like she was hesitant but eager at the same time. Carmilla took a strand of her hair and ran it through her fingers, letting the soft strands flow through easily.

"Someone... With honey brown eyes." Carmilla muttered. "Someone... With a smile so bright you almost have to shield your eyes." Carmilla dared to lock eyes with Laura, pushing her to continue. "With the biggest heart I've ever seen, who won't hesitate to call me out when I did something wrong, who can make the weight of the world fall off my shoulders just by holding my hand. Someone who is the most stubborn person I think I've ever met, but..." Carmilla rested her hand on Laura's cheek, brushing her thumb over her cheekbones, skin cold and raw from the winds that nipped. "She's the most incredible one too." Her eyes; the begged for her to kiss her. Her lips; they drew her in like magnets. It took everything Carmilla had to not just capture her words in a kiss she's been longing for. Hearing Laura's response was more important than any kiss could ever be. Her gaze dragged to whatever was behind Carmilla, and suddenly it was the most interesting thing in the world.

"Hey. Wait a second." Laura said. _Seriously?_ Carmilla thought to herself, pulling her hand down as Laura's interest seemed to alter. 

"Hm?"

Laura paused, and crawled next to the opening. She stuck her hand out, and when she pulled it back in it was wet.

"It's snowing."

Carmilla peeked out the entrance, seeing the snow fall. It was slow, and gentle; like it was taking it's time before reaching the ground. Carmilla couldn't stop her smile, watching as Laura repeatedly stuck her hand in and out, fascinated by the falling snow though Carmilla couldn't care less. She wanted to continue that; to hear her response but something tells her the moment passed. Never in her life could she ever think to hate snow, but at the same time she love it, as Laura seemed to take great fascination in it's free fall. 

"It is, cupcake." Carmilla said softly. Laura flashed her a smile.

"You don't care at all, do you?" 

Carmilla shook her head.

"Nope." _I care more about how you feel on what I just confessed._

Laura rolled her eyes and crawled back next to Carmilla. It was silent for a moment, so much so that if you really focused you could hear the gentle patter as the snowflakes landed on the ground, the rooftop.  _She has to know I meant her- right?_ Carmilla examined the walls that she was in oh so long ago. The drawings were still there, the symbols, the writing. There was some writings of their own, some they did as children. Carmilla smiled as she came across one.

"Do you remember when we used to have code names for different situations?" Carmilla said with an airy chuckle.

"Ohhh yeah." Laura replied. Carmilla traced the writing with her forefinger.

"Peanut butter and frog."

"Endearing, really." Laura chaffed. Carmilla snickered and shook her head, but as she looked at Laura she realized her gaze was still on the falling snow outside. Carmilla sighed. _Well, the moments already passed..._

"Do you want to..." Carmilla sighed once more. "Go out in the snow?" She asked reluctantly. 

"Please." 

Carmilla laughed and the two crawled back out and into the field, the snow falling on top of their clothes and melting from their heat. They stood there for a moment, watching as the clouds covered the night sky and dropped the gentle flakes. Laura stuck her tongue out.

"Cupcake, what are you doing?" Carmilla questioned, though the sight was quite amusing. 

"What? You've never done this?" Laura retorted, sticking her tongue back out.

"I've seen people do it in movies, but..."

"Do it. It's fun." Laura encouraged.

"I'm not doing that."

"Oh come on, Carm. It's fun!" 

Carmilla rolled her eyes, but for Laura's sake, she stuck out her tongue. She immediately stuck it back in.

"I look ridiculous."

"You think I care?" Laura retorted. Carmilla sighed heavily, and looked back to the clouded sky and stuck out her tongue. Snow flakes started to fall, melting as soon as they landed. 

"This is boring." Carmilla commented, turning her gaze back to Laura. Laura rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue back in her mouth. "And, side note, we _both_ look ridiculous doing this." She teased. Laura rolled her eyes.

"You just don't know how to have fun." Laura challenged, crossing her arms and quirking an eyebrow. Carmilla's eyebrows shot to her hairline.

" _I_ don't know how to have fun?"

"Mhm."

Carmilla huffed.

"I know how to have fun." Carmilla retorted. Laura pursed her lips to the side.

"Mmm. I don't think so." She dared. Carmilla squinted at Laura, though her teasing was adorable, the cocky smile. 

"I can prove it." Carmilla challenged, taking a step forward.

"Oh yeah?" 

"Mhm." Carmilla said, her mind on one thing. "Close your eyes." She said softly. Laura gave her a pointed look. "Come on. Do it." Laura sighed, but fluttered her eyes shut nonetheless. Carmilla bent down, collected a handful of snow, and, without warning, threw a snowball at Laura. Her eyes shot open as she gasped.

"Carmilla!" Laura squeaked, jumping back. Carmilla chuckled, but it was cut short when a snowball came flying her way. 

"Oh you're going to pay for that creampuff." Carmilla scooped another snowball and threw it at Laura, hitting her square in the shoulder. She squealed and made a snowball of her own. Even now, even as they were mercilessly throwing snowballs at each other and laughing like fools, Laura was beautiful. Maybe the reason the snow melted when it reached Carmilla was because of how heartwarming Laura's smile was; Carmilla wouldn't be surprised if that was the why. All reality seemed to slip into fantasy when she was with her, like a vortex she couldn't help but fall into.

"Okay, okay! Truce!" Carmilla called out as Laura's snowballing skills quickened their pace. 

"There is no truce in war!" Laura chanted, throwing another snowball at Carmilla.

"Oh god!" Carmilla cried out. Her eyes landed on the treehouse. If she darts now, while Laura is mid-way of creating a snowball, she can make it. Carmilla took her chances and darted off to the treehouse. She was there- she almost made it. If she could keeping going with her strides but slender arms wrapped around her waist and lifted her off her feet.

"Nope!" Laura called out, tackling Carmilla in the ground. They broke into a fit of laughter, smiles wide as they hit the snow. They landed on their backs, laughing together in a moment of bliss. Carmilla knew her clothes were already soaked from the all-out war, so rolling in the snow didn't matter as much. As Carmilla watched Laura, her laughter started to subside.

"Hey Carm." Laura suddenly said after moments of silence.

"Hm?"

Laura turned her head, her honey brown eyes carrying flecks of bronze.

"You probably don't remember this, since we were both jet lagged and exhausted, but if you did... Well, you asked me to promise you something but you never told me what." Laura said. Carmilla knit her brows, going through the fogged memories of that first day they were back in this town. But, eventually it clicked. Carmilla smiled, awkwardly so, and chuckled bashfully.

"I, uh... It's not important." Carmilla muttered with a shake to her head. Laura rolled her eyes.

"Come on. Don't play this game. Just tell me."

She knew then she was going to, with Laura's soft smile. She had to; all it took was for Laura to ask. Carmilla sighed. 

"I... This is stupid."

"You find everything stupid."

"Not you." Carmilla muttered. It was silent for a beat, then Carmilla spoke. "I... Well," she took Laura's small hand in hers, fidgeting with her fingers, "can you promise me, for real this time, that you won't leave me?" For a moment, Carmilla regretted her words. She wanted to suck them back in and pretend they never happened because now she was out in the open and oh so vulnerable. But, as Laura interlaced their fingers, she didn't mind so much.

"Of course, Carm." Laura said, giving her hand a comforting squeeze. "I always will be." Carmilla's heart fluttered in her chest, her stomach performing tumbles as a broad smile spread across her cheeks. But... There was a reason she was out here tonight, a reason she had left Brandy, a reason she felt so happy, a reason she would carry a pang in her heart and a reason she couldn't sleep some nights. If words weren't going to work, then there was one thing left to do.

Carmilla released Laura's hand and climbed on top of her, straddling her. 

"What are you doing?" Laura asked, her smile wide. She looked so beautiful then; the way her hair sprawled out underneath her, her smile wide, cheeks pink, eyes full. Laura propped herself up on her elbows. "Everything okay?" Carmilla found the one way she knew how to communicate. She took Laura's head in her hands and kissed her, and god did it feel so right. And when Laura kissed her back, the world just fit into place. It spun around them, like they were the axis. Every single nerve in her enlivened like a chain reaction of TNT exploding inside. Her heart fluttered- no; it soared, like the wings of a hummingbird. She was light, oh so light, as Laura pushed Carmilla's hair out of the way, the touch so gentle it could have been mistaken by a simple gust of wind. 

In such deep amore for so long, falling so fast, loving her so much, Carmilla transferred into her feelings into the kiss. It felt like that first breath of spring, where you know the cold, dark days are over and the sun is back and the days will be warm. She was in this cold, dingy place and Laura was the first ray of sunshine that warmed her skin and lit her life. She was captivated; completely captivated as Laura's hands landed on her hips. Their lips danced; meeting in a tango that has never felt more natural. 

But it was cut short as the annoying chime of the Doctor Who theme song played. Slowly, Carmilla pulled back, happy, but oh so confused. Laura blushed, and dug through her pocket before she pulled out her phone. Carmilla smiled.

"Your ringtone is Doctor Who?" Carmilla teased. Leaning back so her tie didn't drape over Laura. Laura smiled.

"Um, well... Yeah. Give me a moment." 

Carmilla chuckled as Laura held her phone to her ear, swinging her leg off of Laura she sat on the ground, watching her.

"Hello?" Laura greeted. "Oh. Hey dad." Yikes- Carmilla forgot about him. "No, no. Carmilla and I... What? Oh- shut up... I don't know... Yes, I promise we'll be home for Christmas... Jesus dad we're just walking around; not moving to Russia..." The rest of her words sort of faded away. Carmilla became completely entranced by Laura, the way she sat, the way her pitch would squeak, her smile, her voice. If the snow wasn't so cold to keep her in this reality she's sure she'd never wake from the spell. "Okay, love you too. Bye." Laura sighed and hung up her phone.

"Sorry, um. That was my dad. He thought I got kidnapped." Laura said rather bashfully. Carmilla chuckled lightly and shook her head. Should she kiss her again? She wanted to; god she wanted to. That kiss was incredible. But, suddenly something change in Laura. Her smile faded, her gaze lost it's bliss. Laura then hopped to her feet, and dusted off the snow, though the flakes falling quickly replaced them. Carmilla watched with confusion as Laura walked off to the treehouse, climbing the ladder and crawling back in. What was that about? Carmilla hopped to her feet and chased after her, coming to a halt in front of the treehouse. Was it because Carmilla kissed her? She kissed her back, right? Did it bother her? No- Carmilla isn't going to back down.

Not this time.

Carmilla climbed up the ladder, stopping at the last one to gaze inside. Laura sat with her knees bent, her elbows resting on them and her hands in her hair. She flashed Carmilla tight-lipped smile, but she knew well enough to know it was fake; something was bothering her. Carmilla clambered inside and sat next to Laura, her mind still racing at the rate of her heart. It was silent for a passage of time. Carmilla wanted to ask her what was wrong, what was bothering her, why she walked away after a kiss like that... Carmilla peeked at Laura out of her peripheral, Laura's gaze trained to the floor. What was this about? Why'd she walk away?

"Um..." Carmilla started, not sure what to say next. "I'm sorry if you were bothered by... That." Laura shook her head.

"No, no. I wasn't."

Carmilla cocked her eyebrow. 

"Then why'd you walk away?" She asked. Laura was silent for a moment as Carmilla's heart started to pound. This was one of the closest times they've ever gotten to talking about this, or anything like this this. For the first time, it was mildly confrontational; and Carmilla had no plans of changing that. 

"It doesn't matter to you like it does to me." Laura murmured, draping her hands down and looking at Carmilla with an exasperated look she's never seen before. Carmilla's eyes went wide.

"You think that didn't matter to me?" Carmilla retorted in disbelief.

"Maybe, but... Not in the way that it matters to me." 

Carmilla tried to swallow past a lump forming in her throat. With a deep breath of encouragement, her heart racing and stomach tumbling, Carmilla spat out her question.

"How does it... Matter to you?" Again, silence. They locked eyes, and everything changed. It was them; only them. The snow stopped falling, the world stopped spinning as Carmilla waited on edge. Suddenly an annoying blare of an alarm pierced the air, causing them both to jump and the world to start spinning again. "Argh! What the hell is that?" Carmilla yelped, covering her hands with her ears.

"Sorry, sorry." Laura replied, and, of course, it came from her phone. Laura shut off the earsplitting sound, and checked her screen. "Oh. It's Christmas." Laura said.

"Is it?" Carmilla retorted, peeking down at her screen, reading; 12:00AM, December 25th in black coloring. Carmilla smiled. "Oh. It is." Laura smiled. 

"Merry Christmas Carm." Laura went to peck Carmilla's cheek, but it was comical really, quickly turning into the world's sweetest gift as Carmilla turned her head to say something but instead Laura's lips landed on hers; a wonderful surprise. As they pulled back, Laura's eyes had softened back into the benign gaze, searching Carmilla's it seemed, for an answer. 

"Carmilla?" 

"Hm?" This was it.

"I... I think... No I know..." 

"Yeah?" Carmilla ebbed on. There was a glimmer in Laura's eyes that she couldn't help but be drawn to, scooting closer to her. 

"I think I like you more than a friend." Laura blurted out. Carmilla's eyes went wide for a moment. She... What? As Carmilla seemed to realize that yes, Laura just said that, and yes, this was reality, a slow smile crept upon her expression.

"Me too." Carmilla said, and the world stopped again. Everything stopped again as Laura smiled back. This small moment; this one they shared would be the last time they're ever confused by their feelings. Laura snickered, and cupped Carmilla's chin, bringing her into the sweetest kiss Carmilla has ever gotten the pleasure to have.

"Some things never change, huh cupcake?" Carmilla teased as she pulled back. Laura rolled her eyes.

"Shut up and kiss me." Laura whispered on her lips.

"Gladly." 

And so, they did. They kissed then and a thousand times more that night, talking in that lone treehouse until the brink of daylight, going over just how ridiculous it was for them to take this long to finally be together. In all this time, in all the things that changed. In all the different ways the world turned and their lives transformed, there was just some things that never changed- and that was their feelings for each other. It was the one constant that was truer than the way the world rotated around the sun.

And they're feelings are never going to change; Carmilla's sure of it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is the end folks. This has been hell of a fun ride. I appreciate every single one of you! Whether you've been here from the beginning, joined at some random chapter, or just joined I thank you for actually reading this mess. I had such a fun time writing this and talking to so many lovely people. This was the first story I ever really written and I'm surprised I actually wrote this much, since it just kind of started off as practice. But I wouldn't have gotten through most of it if it weren't for the support I got from y'all. So again, thank you for the support, the comments, the kudos, the everything. So, for the last and final time on this mess of a story:  
> Thanks for your comments and kudos!


	27. 5 Years Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 5 years later and heres where they are now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so someone suggested that i do like an epilogue thing and I fell in love with the idea so I figured one thing:  
> Why the fuck not? I kinda wrote this on a whim I guess with minor editing, so if there's any errors, well, whoops.  
> So, I guess this is the final chapter? Idk how the hell to close this off cause I already wrote sentimental shit in the last chapter so. I mean. Thanks? Goodbye? Not so sure. Because like if there's more suggestions I'd be happy to write but like at the same time where the hell do I go from here? Again, not sure. Anyway, hope you enjoy!

**Carmilla**

 

“Carmilla!”

Carmilla groaned. Heavily. Loud enough and strong enough to send vibrations throughout the bed. It wasn’t fair that she had to get up this early, that the sun had to rise so soon. In fact; why should she be? She shouldn’t. It’s unholy and unfair.

Carmilla yanked the sheets over her head and curled into a ball. It wasn’t her fault that the bed was so comfy. Who even made this? Jordan’s? Fucking Bernie and Phil? Whoever the hell did deserves an award because it’s honestly so, so comfortable. She could feel herself sink into the mattress and slip back into sleep...

“Carmilla!" Guess not. "Oh, come on.” Suddenly she was no longer protected by the comfort of the sheets. Carmilla groaned in response, hugging her knees to her chest. “It’s your wedding day and you’re going to sleep in?” Carmilla rolled around so she didn’t have too face the offender.

“It’s my wedding day and I can sleep in as late as I want to, Brandy.” Carmilla retorted bluntly.

“No. Oh no no. I have not spent the last five years of dealing with you and Laura’s shit to have you simply sleep in on your wedding day. I have _not_ spent the last year planning your wedding with Perry just to have you skip it over a couple of more hours of sleep.” It seemed so long ago when Carmilla and Brandy first met, when she pushed Carmilla to see Laura, to confess her feelings. After that night, Carmilla decided to text Brandy and tell her that they were together. Since they had such a connection, they just decided to be friends.

Well, 5 years later, and Brandy’s now her best (wo)man. Funny the way things work out, huh?

“Carmilla. I am going to count to three, and if you’re not out of this bed I _will_ call Perry.” Should she risk that endeavor? “One…” She could handle Perry, right? She could handle the screaming? “Two…” She could handle the mental flips and the blood curdling screams along with vague threats right? Right? “Thr-“

“I’m UP!” Carmilla said, springing to her feet. No- she couldn’t. Brandy smiled.

“Good. Now, Lafontaine and Kirsch along with the tailor will be here in 30 to help you get into your tux. Please don’t fall back asleep.”

Carmilla rolled her eyes.

“Yes master. Whatever you say, oh lord of thee above.” Carmilla grumbled, earning a swat to her arm.

“No fucking around, okay? Not today." Brandy's words were meaningless to her. Carmilla simply rolled her eyes and ran her hand through her messy hair. "Do it for Laura, yeah?” Oh, and now Carmilla cares. She sighed.

“You know the way to my heart.” Carmilla said, clutching her chest. Brandy rolled her eyes.

“You're so head over heels for her it's actually repulsive. I’ll be back in 20.”

“I’ll be waiting.”

Brandy stuck her tongue out and exited the room, making sure to flip her off before shutting the hotel door. Carmilla sighed, and gathered some comfortable clothes to wear before the inevitable tuxedo.

Carmilla smiled to herself.

It was that Christmas morning, all those years ago, when Laura and Carmilla finally admitted their feelings on that magical night. They could barely wait a day before going on their first official date, or their second, or third. They went on three consecutive dates that Christmas day. It was a few days after, as soon as the clock struck midnight and it marked New Years, that Carmilla asked Laura to be official.

 

**_5 Years Ago..._ **

 

_She stood inside the dingy bar, her arm wrapped tightly around Laura’s waist as they all stood, watching the TV impatiently for the clock to strike midnight. They had five minutes, sure. But it was the most nerve wrecking 5 minutes Carmilla has ever sustained. She decided that when that clock struck midnight, she was going to ask Laura to be her girlfriend._

_Which, okay. Yes, They may have rushed into things. But… They’ve had these feelings for so long, and it took them so long to finally sort them out that Carmilla was tired of waiting. She realized, if she’s going to do something, she’s never going to put it off._

_Procrastination just wasn’t her gig anymore; especially when Laura’s the praise._

_11:58 and her nerves were still running high. Lafontaine tossed a couple of jokes on how this was nearly as excruciating as the wait for Carmilla and Laura to be together, Kirsch and Danny sat happily, grossly in love as they were still newly engaged. Perry and Lafontaine stood hand in hand, too grossly in love (but what was new?)_

_11:59 and there’s only 30 seconds till New Year’s. Carmilla and Laura turned to each other. Carmilla was sure that her heart could very well beat out of her chest, the way her hands were shaking could produce earthquakes, how shallow her breathing was could very well make her pass out. But, as Laura smiled, the crowd chanting the last 10 digits, her nerves were gone. Ten… Nine... Eight…_

_“Laura?” Carmilla said. Seven..._

_“Yeah Carm?” Six… Five… Four…_

_“Will you... Will you be my girlfriend?” She asked, her voice uncertain. Three… Two.._

_“Of course I will.”_

_One._

_Carmilla pulled Laura in for the best kiss she’s ever had in her life, but yet again, she thinks that every time they kiss. She ignored the slight tang of beer that still tasted on her lips, the hooting crowd, the bodies jumping and people celebrating the new year. In that moment, it was only them. The words were so simple but oh so sweet. Finally, finally they were girlfriends._

_Officially._

 

Carmilla turned the shower head on, leaning against the sink counter as she waited for the water to turn warm. She smiled as she scrolled through the recent string of texts.

 

_**Kirsch:** Bro!!! Getting married 2day!!! Congrats boo!!! (But I still got married first I win)_

 

_**Xena:** I’m making a bet with Lafontaine that you’re going to fuck up when you put on Laura’s wedding ring_  
_**Xena:** No pressure doe_  
_**Xena:** Don’t think about it_

 

_**Perry:** Friendly reminder to WAKE UP IF YOU AREN’T ALREADY_

 

_**Brandy:** Bitch u better b awake_

 

_**Laf:** Hey I’m makin a bet w/ Danny that you’re not going to fuck up when you put on the wedding ring and I need that 5 dollars so can you kindly not screw up?_  
_**Laf:** Congrats tho  
 **Laf:** But pls dont screw up_

 

Carmilla ignored the texts- she'd send replies later. If Carmilla wasn’t showered by the time Brandy got back she’s sure she’d be on her deathbed.

The steam soon filled the bathroom, making Carmilla’s skin pink and warm. She sighed, and set her phone down. As she went to tear her shirt off, she felt gentle hands join her in the endeavor. As she pulled it over her head she smiled, the love of her life standing there with a mischievous grin.

“Laura! What are you doing here?” Carmilla said, her voice quiet as though someone will hear them through the walls. Laura smirked and started taking off her own clothing.

“We don’t have much time.” Laura said.

“Isn’t this breaking tradition? Seeing the bride before the wedding?” Carmilla teased, though she was certainly not opposed to this.

“According to some people, gay marriage is breaking tradition, and look at us. Depends on who you ask.” Laura retorted with a wink. “Now come on. I want to take a shower with you, and possibly do some other things _not so_ cleansing before we’re wives.” Carmilla rolled her eyes though her smile stayed wide, tossing off her pajama bottoms and discarding it to the side.

How did she get so lucky?

 

**Laura**

 

"Really Hollis? You _had_ to sneak over there?” Danny chastised. Laura’s cheeks turned red. Yeah, she wasn't as sneaky as she thought she was when she snuck over to Carmilla's hotel room. Perry was hot on her trail and gave her an earful as soon as she snuck back out. 

“Did I have to?” Laura said, lifting her arms as the tailor made sure the dress was okay. “No. Did I anyway? Yes.” Once in the clear Laura checked herself out in the mirror.

The dress was simple; white with weird floral-type ruffles. It didn’t poof at the end like normal wedding dresses did; Laura didn’t want to have to deal with that. It cut low in a U, two straps that held it up on the edges of her shoulders. Her hair was tied up in some fancy bun or pony tail that Laura really didn’t care to remember it’s name. She wore more makeup than she ever had in her life; she's never seen such a diverse palette of tools and brushes. She felt like a canvas, though she was painted into a masterpiece.

“Oh you look beautiful Laura!” Perry exclaimed, giving her shoulders a quick squeeze with a broad smile.

“Do you think she’ll like it?” Laura asked. She didn't even have to say who that was about.

“Of course!” Danny and Perry replied in unison, both in dark purple dresses. She had to admit; she did look gorgeous. Her make up was flawless, her hair was extremely well done, and the dress fit her perfectly. Though, the shoes could be a little more comfortable.

“Honey, you could walk out in a torn up shirt and jean shorts and she’d still like it.” And, of course, who could forget about JP?

“You really think so?” Laura replied, turning around to face her awe-struck friends.

“You don’t?” Danny said in disbelief. Laura’s smile was painted on her face; it hadn’t been removed since she woke up this morning. Laura sighed with content, eyeing herself up and down once more in the mirror before stepping down from the step.

"If Carmilla doesn't think you look good I'll make sure to kick her ass." JP comforted. Laura chuckled and rolled her eyes. Over the years, JP and Laura had gotten oddly close; closer than anyone would expect. It was a weird dynamic of a friendship, but somehow they just worked. Better than JP and Carmilla even. But, Carmilla had a new bestie; Brandy. Which, of course Laura wasn't too happy about in the beginning. But somewhere along the way in this odd, confusing world JP and Brandy started to... Date? It was weird in the beginning, just how everything is. Weird, and confusing. But, now, Laura is standing here, three of her best friends, waiting to get married to her whole world and the love of her life. Laura sighed with content. 

Nothing will ruin this day- especially with the surprise Laura set up for Carmilla.

 

**Carmilla**

 

“If you would sit still for five fucking seconds I could make sure your eyebrows are perfect.” Brandy chastised, tweezers attacking Carmilla’s face.

“I told you my eyebrows are perfect.” Carmilla replied. “Don’t you think?” Brandy rolled her eyes.

“Kirsch? Help me out here.” Brandy pleaded. Carmilla made a gesture of cutting his throat. His eyes went wide.

“Oh- uh. I think her eyebrows are perfect the way they are.” Kirsch stuttered, trying to fix his own bow tie. She gave in an approving nod and a sly thumbs up.

“You doof- let me fix it.” Lafontaine started straightening out his bow tie. “Jesus, Kirsch. Even my two year old daughter can do a bowtie better than you.” Lafontaine reminded.

That, was another thing. Perry and Lafontaine, still holding off on getting married until their at least 28, have an adopted child. No one expected it, really. It happened so fast, like a lot of things in Carmilla's life. It just happened one day on Laf's 24th birthday, just a year ago. They said that they and Perry have been preparing for this for a long, long time, and then brought out Florence. She was shy, at first, but she eventually made a home in the little family in this crazy group of friends.

Carmilla smirked victoriously, and jumped out of her seat. She eyed herself in the mirror.

Carmilla wore a black tuxedo with a white button-up underneath, a red tie tucked neatly beneath her blazer. Her hair was slightly curled- that being Brandy’s idea. Carmilla sighed. William was always good with tuxedos, and Mattie was always a master of, well, everything. If only they were here…

"You okay?” Brandy asked. Carmilla sighed once more.

“Yeah, I just… I wanted Mattie and William to be here, you know?” Carmilla muttered. Brandy nodded, and rubbed her back in soothing patterns. Carmilla smirked. “Hitting on me on my wedding day, eh?” Carmilla teased, using humor to cover up her hurt. Brandy rolled her eyes and playfully shoved her shoulder.

“Still a narcissistic asshole on your wedding day, _eh_?” Brandy shot back, crossing her arms. Carmilla laughed and looked back to the mirror. She’s never worn this much make up in her life. This doesn’t even compare to the tons of makeup she wore to cover up bruises she used to get. So much contour, a lot of eyeliner, lipstick, mascara- really after a certain point Carmilla just lost track. But, she had to admit however, she looked dapper as fuck.

“Do you think Laura will like it?” Carmilla asked quietly.

“If she doesn’t I might have to use my military training.”

Her eyes went wide.

“Hm, and you may be marrying her but I am _not_ afraid to trample over her in my stilettos.”

Her heart swelled in her chest. No- could it be? Carmilla turned around, a wide smile already painted on her face as she saw William and Mattie standing there, both with smiles as wide as her.

“OH MY GOD!” Carmilla had no self control as she hurdled herself at her siblings, wrapping one arm around either of them in one group hug. “Holy crap!” She exclaimed as she pulled back. “You two- when? What? What the actual fuck?”

“Hey kitty.” William greeted.

“William- how- Mattie- what the… I just. Wow. Why are you guys here? How did you get here?” Carmilla exclaimed.

“Your soon to be wife really doesn’t take no for an answer, Carm.” Mattie replied. Somehow, in some way Carmilla’s smile grew wider.

Could she get any more lucky?

 

**Laura**

 

Laura stood anxiously outside the doors, waiting for the ceremony to begin. Apparently, Carmilla had dropped off the radar five minutes ago- much to everyone’s concern. Laura's father stood next to her, in tears as expected, crying over his ‘baby girl’. Of course, everyone knew Carmilla didn’t run out. Laura wouldn’t be surprised if she just had to use the bathroom, or if she got lost. Wasn’t Brandy supposed to keep an eye on her?

Laura fidgeted with her fingers. She doesn’t think Carmilla ran out, but… Did she? She wouldn’t, right? Laura couldn’t help it as her insecurities ran wild. She didn’t show it, of course, putting on her best smile. That was when Carmilla rushed in, wide-eyed and out of breath.

“Carmilla! Where have you-“ But Laura’s words were captured in a purposeful kiss, Carmilla’s arms wrapping around Laura’s waist. Relief washed over her, knowing Carmilla didn’t leave. She wasted no time in wrapping an arm around Carmilla’s shoulders and cupping her cheek in her free hand. She savored this moment, because she doesn't think Carmilla has _ever_ kissed her this passionately before. But yet again, she said the same thing that time they kissed when they became girlfriends, or when Carmilla proposed, and she's sure she'll be saying the same thing when they get married. It wasn’t until her father cleared his throat that they were reminded of their situation.

“Carmilla! You aren’t supposed to see me in my dress! It’s a bad omen.” Laura chastised, gently rubbing her thumb over Carmilla’s cheek, and wow. Carmilla looked absolutely stunning. Then again, Laura thinks the same thing when Carmilla’s wearing no make up and has her hair tied in a bun, or when she just wakes up, or… Just stunning all the time.

“Weren’t you the one saying screw traditions this morning?” Carmilla retorted. Laura rolled her eyes. “I just… I’m so god damn lucky, Laura. You’re honestly the love of my life. I can’t express that enough. I love you so so much, and I know this is insane, since we're getting married in like 5 minutes, but I saw Mattie and William and they informed me  you set it up and I-“

“CARMILLA KARNSTEIN!” There was only one voice that could reach such earsplitting levels- Perry.

“Damn girl! You really got some legs and stamina.” Lafontaine said next, both of them panting heavily. Perry grabbed Carmilla by her ear and started tugging her away.

“I love you!” Carmilla called out.

“I love you too!” Laura replied, her smile wide.

"Seriously! So much! And I know we're going to be getting married soon but I-"

"Carmilla! Let's go!" Lafontaine chastised as Perry continued to drag her away by her ear. Laura waved her goodbye as she disappeared behind a turn in a storm. Her dad gave her a strange look.

"What was..." He shook his head. "You know what? Nope. I'm not gonna question it." Laura smiled, and sighed with content. 

And Carmilla says she’s the lucky one.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Should her hands be clasping in front of her? Or behind her? Should she grab her wrist in one hand? Or just fold her hands? Place them in her pockets? A million suggestions ran through Carmilla’s mind. She barely even got to look at Laura- or even focus on her. She was just so happy, that she just ran as soon as she knew that she brought Mattie and William here. Which, Perry practically tore her ear off, but it was worth it to get out a few words before she became a blubbering mess at the official wedding.

Wow. Wedding. Carmilla's getting married- right now. Today. Right here. Oh god- what the hell does she do with her hands?

“Would you stop fidgeting?” She heard Brandy chastise.

“How am I supposed to?” Carmilla retorted. “It doesn’t help that literally everyone in here is staring at me.”

“Yeah. They’re staring at you because it’s your wedding, numbnut.” She heard Xena add.

“Oi. You don’t get to chastise me. You were crying before, during and after _your_ wedding.” Carmilla whispered back. “And you set up a bet on my wedding!” She added as an after thought.

“Yeah Carmilla please don’t screw up.” Lafontaine pleaded.

“Please do.” Xena said.

“Not helping.” Carmilla muttered. Her hands never sweat. Not once in her life did she ever get sweaty palms, yet here she was, with clammy hands for the first time in her life. Her heart pounded away in her chest, an excitement bubbling in her stomach but also a nervousness she’s never known.

Suddenly, the piano started to play. Carmilla held her breath, the seconds slowly ticking by, until the doors opened.

Out came Laura, arm in arm with her dad, her radiant smile painted across her cheeks and tears already pricking at her eyes. Carmilla's heart stopped. It was like she had tunnel vision; Laura there, only Laura. Carmilla wasn't sure if her heart was pounding or if it had stopped, if her hands were fidgeting or if she was frozen, if her stomach was tumbling or if the world was still turning or if the sky was blue that day because all she knew was Laura and how absolutely stunning she looked.

Everything seemed to go by in a blur after that. Whatever words were spoken, whatever happened, it just went by so fast. She saw through tear-full eyes the whole time, her cheeks sore from how wide her smile was, for how long it lasted. She was so nervous, oh so nervous but oh so in love. She'd feel embarrassed but Laura was crying too; she was crying, Carmilla was crying but it didn't matter because they were getting married.

Carmilla was slowly drawn back down as she slipped on Laura's wedding ring, as she muttered an "I do." Carmilla had dreamt it; dreamt of this moment and imagined it in her head a thousand times but it was nothing in comparison to the real thing. It was almost too much. An overwhelming excitement and happiness. She didn't know what to do with herself. But as Laura slipped on Carmilla's wedding ring and she whispered an "I do", everything fit into place.

Laura nearly jumped in Carmilla's arms as he said 'you may kiss the bride'. Carmilla caught her; caught her like she's always done as her arms clasped around Laura's waist and hers around Carmilla's neck. Laura was bouncing up and down in her arms as they kissed, the feeling so surreal that Carmilla wasn't even sure if she'd remember this moment. But after what seemed like ages, and Laura pulled back, happily her wife, Carmilla made sure she remembered. 

Fireworks exploded in her chest like the ones in the sky all those nights ago, like they always do every time they kiss. If Carmilla didn't know any better she'd say it was magic; magic or some sort of spell because this happiness was too surreal. Laura smiled, everyone shouting, though it all was faded away. It was just Laura. Just Laura and Carmilla and no one else.

That's how it is and that's how it's always been; some things never change.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end?


	28. First Things First

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lmao remember when we were all sad cause we thought it was the end? Haha good times... good times... I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing with this I thought it was the end like 2 chapters ago
> 
> Anyway here are some first milestones in the Hollstein relationship have a good one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops I guess?
> 
> This is one of those things where like you can read a little bit and get back to it later, or you can read it all at once. Idk I wrote a lot and you don't really have to follow it in any particular order. You might be a little lost, but you don't have to. It's all loosey goosey with this chapter.
> 
> So, okay. Most of my chapters are 40-60k chapters long; this chapter was nearly 100k characters long. Just as a heads up.
> 
> I didn't edit too much cause this chapter was so long so I apologize in advance for any errors.
> 
> I hope you enjoy.

_ **The Firsts** _

 

**First Date**

 

Carmilla and Laura's first date was within the same hours that they actually got together. The beginning moved fast, as they were eager to finally be together. They hadn't even fallen asleep yet, reaching into the early hours of that Christmas morning.

 

**Carmilla**

 

"Your dad wants us home, cupcake." Carmilla said. Laura had been tugging Carmilla left and right down these streets like a puppy on a leash. Of course Carmilla didn't mind. She was still in this nostalgic state over the fact that she and Laura were finally together. She loved every moment of it. Thought they were only dating, it still felt better than anything had in months. 

"I know he does." Laura replied, tugging her down yet another street. "But it's only 6 in the morning. He's usually not up until 8. And even then, he's going to be stoked that we're together." The snow had stopped falling hours ago, adding an inch or two to the already-blanketed ground. Carmilla and Laura's clothes were dryer than before, though they were still slightly damp. 

"Why would he be stoked?" Carmilla asked. Laura gave Carmilla's hand a squeeze.

"Because he's one of the people that convinced me that you actually have feelings for me." 

Carmilla took a few steps so she was next to Laura.

"Whoa whoa whoa. One of the people?" Carmilla questioned. Laura beamed up at her, their smiles never dissipating in the hours they finally got together.

"Mhm." She said with a nod.

"Who else?" Carmilla asked. Laura shrugged.

"Danny, Kirsch, Lafontaine, Perry, JP..."

"So... Basically everyone but me?" Carmilla teased. But to her surprise, Laura nodded. "What? Did I not make it clear enough?" 

"Not to me."

Carmilla scoffed.

"Laura I kissed you like a million times." 

"Still didn't do well enough job. Otherwise we'd have been together sooner." 

"Whoa whoa." Carmilla said. "You were the one that kept walking out." 

"Still not well enough." Laura simply retorted. Carmilla squinted, and took a step in front of her. Carmilla used her free hand to cup Laura's cheek, bringing her into a passionate kiss. Carmilla put everything she had into it, transmitting every feeling she had and wrapping her arms tightly around Laura's waist. God, she'll never get tired of doing this, of finally being able to kiss her without any confusion. Without someone walking away or wondering if the other had feelings. She knew now she did; she's dating her. Carmilla kissed her one last time before she pulled back.

"Convinced now?" Carmilla asked with a smirk. Laura smiled, and clasped her arms around Carmilla's neck. 

"If I ever get sick of your kisses please think I've gone mad." Carmilla laughed, and pecked her lips once more before Laura slipped out of her arms. She interlaced their fingers before dragging her again. For the moment that Carmilla's eyes weren't on Laura, Carmilla recognized the place; 

Their elementary school. 

"What the creeping hell is this?" Carmilla said, recognizing the features. In all the ways this town has changed, been renovated, one thing seemed constant; this elementary school was shit. Laura giggled.

"What, do you not remember this place?" She questioned.

"Of course I do." Carmilla retorted. "This is where we first met. I'll always remember this place." 

"Well, follow my lead then."

Carmilla could practically hear Laura's smile. 

 

**Laura**

 

Laura easily pick-locked her way into the school, ignoring Carmilla's claims that it's 'illegal' and 'morally wrong'. She had decided this was where their first date was going to be and she's keeping it that way. Besides, it's Christmas; no one's going to be around.

She was fond of the way Carmilla examined the halls, watching the way her eyes danced across them, reminiscing in the times she had. She loved the small smile that danced on her lips, her hand wrapped tightly in Laura's. Eventually, they broke onto the roof, showing to be snowing once more, the pace slow and gentle. Laura smiled.

"It's snowing again." Laura muttered. Carmilla hummed in response, and draped an arm around Laura's shoulders. Laura watched as Carmilla stared to the sky, her head tilted upward. It was silent for a beat before Carmilla spoke

"You know, years ago I was standing here." She said, her voice trailing away. Laura cocked an eyebrow.

"Really?"

Carmilla nodded.

"I was 11, and I wondered if things would ever get better." Her mind seemed to be some place else for a moment.

"Did they?" Laura couldn't help but ask. A small smile played on her lips as her gaze met Laura's.

"Well, I'm here with you." 

Laura smiled, and coiled her arm around Carmilla's waist. She rested her head on her shoulder. A small peaceful moment lasted between them, the snow falling, standing on the roof to their elementary on this first official date.

"Which, to clarify," Carmilla said, "is the best damned thing that has ever happened to me." Somehow, Laura's smile got wider. She picked her head off of Carmilla's shoulder, gazing into the dark eyes that were already staring at her.

"The best?" Laura echoed. Carmilla nodded.

"The very best." As soon as Carmilla spoke the words Laura already knew where this was headed.

"I wish I hadn't started this." Laura murmured.

"Like no one ever was." Carmilla balled her hand and held an imaginary microphone. "To catch them all is my test."

"I forgot that you were a pokemon fan back in the day." Laura muttered.

"To train them is my cause." 

"I swear to god..." Carmilla grabbed Laura hips.

"I will travel, across the land." She still sang, swaying their hips in unison back and forth. "Searching far and wide." Carmilla grabbed Laura's hand and brought her into a waltz. "Each pokemon, to understand. The power that's inside." Laura shook her head. She's going to hate herself for doing this later, but right now-

"Pokemon! Gotta catch em all!" Laura belted out.

"It's you and me!" 

And so, they sang the pokemon theme song and danced like complete idiots on top of their old elementary school. Was it an odd date? Sure. But was it memorable? Well...

It's certainly something neither of them would never forget.

  

**First Fight**

 

The first fight between Laura and Carmilla- now that was a mess. Carmilla doesn’t think she’s ever seen Laura that angry, never seen her so pissed off but it was tainted with pain as well. Carmilla had never been so scared to lose Laura. Never had been so close to losing her; it was mortifying.

 

**Laura**

 

Coming back to Styria was surprisingly refreshing. Well, being with Carmilla was refreshing. Now they could not be confused with random kisses that would never be unspoken of, or random acts of passion that would only deepen the feelings they both had tried to stop. They could hold hands without being confused of the meaning, they could say their feelings freely without having to worry.

Now, Carmilla and Laura lay on the grass in the park after Carmilla’s work, watching the stars, Carmilla’s arm wrapped around Laura’s shoulders, Laura’s head on Carmilla’s chest, hand playing with strands of Carmilla’s hair.

“The stars don’t give a shit if you did get a D on that test.” Carmilla said in some attempt to comfort Laura. Laura snickered and shook her head. She’s grown to appreciate the odd ways Carmilla tries to comfort Laura. In their own way, they are special, because she does it for her and no one else.

“The stars may not, but I certainly do.” Laura rested her chin on top of Carmilla’s shoulder. “The stars aren’t the ones that studied their ass off for that test.” She muttered. Carmilla cocked an eyebrow.

“You call that studying your ass off?” Carmilla said in disbelief.

“What?”

“Cupcake. Every moment we’re apart we’re texting and every moment we’re together you don’t study.”

Laura bit the inside of her cheek. Okay, maybe that had a little bit of truth to it. So, maybe it wasn't too surprising that she had gotten a D.

“I can’t help it; you’re too distracting.” Laura replied. 

“I’m sure your grades wont take that as a valid excuse.”

Laura rolled her eyes once more and shook her head.

“OH MY GOSH! IT’S CARMILLA KARNSTEIN!” Shrieked a voice. Carmilla and Laura groaned in unison. They, surprisingly, caught the guy who came into the store with a knife. Well, by they she means Carmilla. Carmilla had actually caught the guy (nice job police). Believe it or not she ran into him in a coffee shop on the outskirts of town. He caused a scene, one that Carmilla tries to downplay, but long story short the guy whipped out a gun and Carmilla took him down. Someone recorded it and it went everywhere. Carmilla had to face countless interviews and now she’s the local hero to all of Styria. The fame will be short-lived though- these types of things always pass.

“Let me handle that. You stay here.” Carmilla pecked Laura’s forehead before jumping to her feet, darting off to the shrieking teens. Laura sighed and sat up. It was only a week or two ago but people are still flipping out over it. Which, okay. Maybe Laura was a little jealous that so many people wanted Carmilla’s attention, but yet again who wouldn’t? 

Laura was surprised when a buzzing sound commenced, and as her eyes darted to the source she spotted Carmilla’s phone light up.

“Carmilla! You forgot your-“ She was already with the people far away. Laura sighed. No point in trying to get her back.To cure her own curiosity, Laura picked up Carmilla’s phone, adjusting her sight to the bright screen.

_**Brandy:**  Hey!! Landed and made it safe to my hotel. Hope to see you soon ;)_

Laura’s heart dropped to the pit of her stomach, a white-hot anger suddenly replacing the blood pumping through her veins. 

Brandy?

 

**Carmilla**

 

Laura was already taking off by the time she managed to escape the fan-girling teens. Was she that bothered by the attention? Carmilla chased after her, but man can Laura pace at inhumanely fast speeds. She created a whole knew definition of power walking. Why was Laura so angry? Was the attention truly that bothersome?

After 30 more seconds of extreme power walking, Carmilla managed to catch up to her, slightly out of breath.

“Hey.” Carmilla said, trying to keep up with her pace.

“Hey.” Laura snapped back. Carmilla was greatly taken aback. Whoa- what did she do wrong?

“Uh, mind slowing down? It’s kinda hard to speed walk in leather pants.” That was an excuse to cover up how exactly out of shape Carmilla was.

“I’m sure you’ll keep up just fine.” Laura said through clenched teeth. Jesus- what the hell did Carmilla do? Laura was practically blowing steam out of her ears. “Don’t you have somewhere to be?” Laura snapped. Somewhere to be? Carmilla managed to match Laura's pace. 

“Uh, no? I thought I was spending the night at yours?”

“Yeah, well. Maybe we should cut the night short.” Laura abruptly stopped in her tracks, giving Carmilla’s already aching legs a break.

“What? Why would we cut it-“

“Why did Brandy text you to see her at a hotel?” Laura held up Carmilla’s phone in her hand and started scrolling through messages. “Hey, landed and made it safe to my hotel. Hope to see you soon. Winky face.” God, her words stung, they stung but Carmilla knew she had to let Laura continue because she wouldn’t get a word in even if she tried. “Lmao, the bell hop just asked me out. Better come soon- wouldn’t want you getting jealous. Another winky face.” Fucking hell Brandy. “I thought you promised me a night I wouldn’t forget? Come on- I flew all this way at least answer your phone.” As Laura’s gaze met Carmilla’s she was scared; scared at the anger in her eyes, but there was something that terrified her even more- losing Laura.

“It’s not like that.” Carmilla pleaded. It really, really wasn’t. After Carmilla ventured back to Styria, she and Brandy kept in touch. Really, it was mainly Carmilla keeping Brandy updated on her and Laura, but Brandy got fired from one of her jobs, and her roommates kicked her out. After hearing that, Carmilla couldn’t stand not to at least do something. So, Carmilla bought Brandy a ticket to Styria and have her move in with her and JP. Of course she was going to tell Laura, but she wanted to wait for everything to get settled before. But this- this was just fucked up.

“Then how is it, Carmilla? Because if you don’t recall, you’ve left me for her before!” Carmilla cringed. Losing her- she can’t lose her. But she doesn’t know how to deal with this fear and acted out in the only way she knew how; anger.

“You said I didn’t matter to you!” Carmilla shouted back. “And we didn’t do anything- and you know what? You were the one that set up that date between her and I.”

“So that gives you the right to cheat on me?”

“I’m not cheating on you!”

“Then why the fuck didn’t you tell me! Why is she here?” Laura cupped her mouth for a moment. “Oh god… Have you been cheating on me with her this whole time?”

“What? No! I would never!” She’s never felt this desperate; this scared, clinging onto Laura by pushing her away.

“Then how do you explain this? How do you explain these,” she tossed Carmilla’s phone to her, who barely caught it, “text messages. How do you explain not telling me she was here, or why she’s even here, or that you were still in contact in the first place!” Carmilla was frozen; it was as though she was having an allergic reaction to this very conversation as her throat tightened and tears filled her eyes. That’s what it had to be, right? Carmilla didn’t cry; that’s not something she does.

“She’s not you.” Carmilla muttered. That’s all she could manage past this barricade of stuffy noses and tear-pricked eyes, tight throats and clenched fists.

“Of course she’s not me I-“

“No.” Carmilla cut her off, taking a step forward. “She’s not… You.” The anger still burned in her eyes, one so piercing that it nearly shocked Carmilla’s life out of her body. Never in her life had she been so terrified of Laura, but she’s never been more scared of losing her either.

“I don’t know what you want me to say to that, Carm.” Carmilla shook her head.

“Then let me do the talking.” Laura’s jaw clamped shut, the fire still roaring as it burned in one wildfire of anger and pain. Carmilla took a deep breath. “When we got together, Brandy and I stayed in touch. I just kinda kept her updated on how our relationship was going, and she’d give me advice, or encourage me to…” The L-word, something still not spilled and she wasn’t ready. “Encouraged me to not turn away.” Better. “We just… We do have a connection, Brandy and I.”

“Oh Carm I-“

“Not like that.” Carmilla cut her off. “It’s strictly platonic. It’s not the connection like you and I have. She doesn’t…" Carmilla sucked in her bottom lip for a moment, and took a small step forward. "She doesn't give me butterflies, or make my heart jump in my chest.” Carmilla took a deep breath, and dared a step forward. “She doesn’t keep me up at night, she doesn’t make me question everything around me. I don’t want to better myself when I’m with her.” She dared a final step forward. “I don’t have feelings for her the way I have feelings for you.” Laura was the one between them to have a tear stream down her cheek. Carmilla wanted to reach out; she did. She wanted to reach out and wipe away that tear. But she knew to keep herself restrained.

“It’s not enough.” Laura muttered. Carmilla's heart became anchored as it sunk to the pit of her stomach. “If you’re going to keep secrets like that, then… How can I know to trust you?” Shattered; Carmilla’s heart was shattered, ripped out of her chest, carelessly thrown to the ground and stomped on like litter. What made everything worse was she didn’t have an answer. She didn’t have an answer, but she could do one thing.

“Brandy got kicked out of her apartment by her roommates and got fired at one of the restaurants she worked at.” That’s a start, right? Telling her the truth. “And, when she told me I just… I wanted to help. And, with how well the library’s been going, I bought her a ticket and flew her out here. She’s going to…” Carmilla shook her head. “ _Was_ , going to stay with me and JP since she really didn’t have anyone else out there. But, I can cancel all of that. I can send her back and-“

“No, no. Don’t do that.” Laura ran a hand through her hair. She hated seeing her this way, but she knew there was nothing she could do. For the first time in a long while, Carmilla felt helpless; completely helpless as the girl she’s loved for so long was just slipping from her grasp.

“What can I do?” Carmilla said, taken aback by the own crack in her voice. She tried, she really did to stop the tears but they spilled from her eyes and ran down her cheeks faster than she could ever think to stop them. “I’ll do anything. I’ll... I’ll shout how much of an asshole I am for all of Styria to hear.” She was breaking now- the reality that she could lose Laura, that she was losing Laura crashing down like a ton of bricks. “I’ll knock out the first person I see. I’ll send Brandy back. I can cut off all communication. I’ll- I’ll spill any secret I’ve ever held here and now. I’ll do anything just- just please don’t leave me.” Silence, the poison that is the slowest death that Carmilla could ever experience. She hated silence. Silence meant indecisiveness, meant a hesitation, a stream of thoughts that she couldn’t be part of.

Laura chewed on her bottom lip. Please don't leave me. She pleaded inside of her mind, an echo that bounced through the walls of her brain. The words burned in her throat like the after taste of alcohol. She wanted to scream. She wanted to shout. But as Laura spoke again, she held on to her hope.

“Do you…" Laura blinked a few times. "Can you promise me you’ll never lie? Again?” Carmilla nodded.

“I’ll tell you all my secrets now if you want. I’ll recall every single lie I’ve ever told if that’s what it takes.” Carmilla pleaded. Laura swallowed, and cupped Carmilla’s cheeks. Carmilla leaned down and pressed their foreheads together, eyes closed as she hoped that Laura would stay.

“Please don’t make me regret this.”

“I won’t.”

So, eventually Carmilla told Laura the whole story. Even scrolled all the way until the first text messages she and Brandy sent just to prove of her faithfulness. Laura believed her, however. She believed her, and that was something Carmilla wasn’t used to, but grateful for nonetheless.

 

**First Time**

 

Surprisingly, it was Carmilla who wanted to wait. She was always old fashioned, but Laura never thought she’d be old fashioned with  _this_. Of course, Laura had no problem waiting. Well, besides the random outbursts of sexual frustration that made Laura nearly tear Carmilla’s clothes off. If she hadn’t promised Carmilla not to do that, she really would have. (She still almost had on several occasions).

 

**Laura**

 

Laura waltzed into Carmilla’s apartment, now owning a key of her own. She was surprised when the home didn’t have it’s usual smoky smell, but one of… Was that lavender?

“Carmilla?” Laura called out, pulling her coat off her shoulders as she kicked off her shoes. The apartment wasn’t as bright as usual. Were the lights dimmed? She hung her coat on the coat rack and made cautious steps up the stairs, peeking over the railing as she ascended.

Where was Mircalla? She usually greets Laura as soon as she walks through the front door. As Laura landed on the floor she spotted a trail of rose pedals leading to Carmilla’s bedroom, which was open. That’s unusual- and why are there rose pedals? Laura picked one up in her hand, feeling the velvet-like texture. Well, they're real ones.

“Carmilla if you’re planning on murdering me I’d rather you be open about it.” Laura teased. Still, there was no response from Carmilla. She sighed and dropped the rose petal to the ground. _What the hell is this?_ Laura rolled her eyes and in spite of herself, followed the trail of pedals.

“If I walk in on a dead body I swear to god…” Laura muttered to herself. She finally entered Carmilla’s room, her steps slow. Still, no sign of Carmilla. Suddenly she heard the door shut behind her. Slender arms wrapped around her waist that she was familiar enough with to know exactly who they belonged to. Laura smirked.

“What’s all this?” Laura said, though she didn’t mind at all. Carmilla hugged Laura closer, pressing Laura’s back to her front.

“I kicked JP and Brandy out.” Carmilla murmured in her ear. Laura couldn’t help but smile.

“You did?”

“Mhm.” She pressed a kiss to Laura’s neck. “Took Mircalla with them- they’re all staying at your apartment for the night. So we have the whole place to ourselves.” Carmilla whispered, her voice low and seductive. A shiver shot down Laura’s spine as Carmilla nibbled on her ear.

“What for?” Laura asked. Carmilla pulled back.

“You serious?”

“Uh, yeah.” Laura turned around in Carmilla’s arms, her eyes going wide as she eyed her girlfriend up and down.

A button up shirt draped from her torso; each button was undone. Beneath it she wore a black lace bra and black underwear- that’s it. Their eyes locked, and with the look Carmilla was giving her, Laura suddenly got the hint.

“Oh.” Laura muttered. “So, the flowers, and the lavender smell, and the…" She eyed Carmilla up and down. " _This_. Because you want to…” Carmilla nodded. 

“Mhm. You got it, cupcake.” She said. Laura's heart skipped a beat in her chest.

"Are you sure you want to?" She asked. They had been together for a while, and Carmilla had made them wait a long time. Carmilla nodded again, sending her heart to start racing in her chest. Laura couldn’t stop the smirk that tugged on her lips. She wrapped an arm around Carmilla’s shoulders and placed a hand on her cheek.

“Then what are you waiting for?” Laura whispered. Carmilla didn’t waste another moment to press their lips together.

They spent the night exploring each other, hands and lips wandering, bodies and minds as one in that one night that could only be described as perfect.

 

**First “I Love You”**

 

This had to be the most trickiest of all; the L-word. Both of them had cold feet about it. They’ve come close a couple of times, but it would either be too soon or too late; there was never a right time. But, Carmilla decided, tonight would be that night. And my god; she wondered if she would ever get the chance to say it at all.

 

**Carmilla**

 

Images danced across her mind of what could possibly go wrong. Carmilla usually does everything on a whim; wings everything she does. But this time, she really wished she planned something beforehand. As Laura sat next to her on the lounge chair, Carmilla's arm around her shoulders and some dumb movie playing from Carmilla's laptop, she knew she wanted to say it, but... What if Laura didn't feel the same? What if Carmilla was pushing too far? They've been together for a little over 5 months now but she's loved her for years. 

"You're doing it again." Laura said out of the blue.

"Doing what?" Carmilla replied. Laura sighed and shut the laptop, closing whatever movie was playing.

"Spacing out." Laura's honey brown eyes met Carmilla's, so gentle and caring. Laura patted Carmilla's thigh. "What's wrong?" Carmilla put on her best smile.

"I'm only spacing out because I'd rather watch you than the movie." Carmilla replied coolly. Laura rolled her eyes. 

"I know you better than that." Laura poked Carmilla's cheek. "That's a fake smile." _How does she always know?_ Carmilla sighed, and rested her head back against the back of the lounge chair. 

"I just..." _Love you. I love you._

"Is it work?" Laura asked. Carmilla shook her head. "Is it the paparazzi?" It had been nearly 3 months since Carmilla caught her attacker, and Styria still saw her as the city's hero like some broody batman. It was annoying, really. To make matters worse she was paraded around like a pony by JP and Brandy. "Is it... Me?" 

"In a sense."

Laura's eyes widened.

"Did I do something wrong?"

Carmilla immediately shook her head and placed her hand on Laura's cheek.

"No, no. We promised no more avoiding issues, remember? That's what prevented us from being together for so long, if you don't recall." Carmilla teased, but Laura still stayed concerned.

"Then what is it?" _I love you. I love you._ The words danced on her tongue in a teasing way, waiting to be spoken. Her whole body screamed for her to say it, just say it. Her mind wanted her to say it, to just speak the words she's held onto for so long. As she opened her mouth to speak-

 _Beep. Beep. Beep._ Carmilla's has never hated an oven so much. Laura smiled in that adorable way where her face scrunched up with it. 

"Hold onto that thought." She said. Having Laura over so much, Carmilla has really gotten to see first hand how bad her cookie addiction really was. And now, she hated it more than ever. Laura squirmed out of Carmilla's arm and waltzed into her kitchen. Carmilla groaned and closed her eyes.

This close. She was this close from finally saying it. _Why the hell did Laura have to make cookies? I'm trying to profess my love, here._ Carmilla sighed. Maybe she could do it in a cute, quirky way. Laura loves cute, quirky things.

Stealthily, Carmilla re-opened Laura's laptop, peeking over the lid every once in a while to make sure Laura didn't see her. Her fingers flowed over the keyboard as she typed 'I love you' into the search bar, and closed the laptop before Laura ever noticed anything happened. 

She returned with a handful of freshly baked cookies wrapped in a napkin. Laura cocked her head to the side.

"What's suddenly gotten you all smiley?" Laura asked as she scooted back into Carmilla's side, Carmilla's arm automatically going over Laura's shoulders again. Her heart raced in her chest but she managed to hide how much of a nervous wreck she was.

"You just make me really happy." Carmilla replied with a bob to her head. Laura rolled her eyes.

"One second ago you were all spaced out and broody but now you're happy?" Laura retorted. She popped a cookie into her mouth, but in a moments notice her eyes went wide and her mouth hang low. "Oh gaw!" Laura jumped off the lounge chair.

"What?" Carmilla exclaimed. Laura rushed back into the kitchen, Carmilla following suit to make sure that she wasn't eating a poisoned cookie. Laura spat it out in a trash can.

"That was fucking hot!" Laura placed the rest of the cookies on the counter and opened up Carmilla's freezer. Carmilla sighed out of relief. _She's not dying- now I can tell her I love her._

"Well it's fresh out of the oven, cupcake. What did you expect?" Carmilla retorted. It surprises Carmilla how dense Laura can be sometimes. 

"Not that!" Laura plucked an ice cube from the freezer. "That was a bad idea. Bad idea. Really, _really_ bad idea." Laura muttered, before placing the ice cube in her mouth, but it was immediately popped back out. "Ouch!"

"What?"

"That's fucking cold!" Laura tossed the ice cube in the sink. Carmilla groaned and buried her face in her hands.

"Do you need a lesson on temperature?" Carmilla muttered, though her words went unheard. Carmilla peaked over the tops of her fingers. She couldn't stop her smile. Laura was holding her tongue in between her forefinger and thumb, eyes crossed. "Sweetheart. What are you doing?" 

"I'm trying to-" Laura's gaze shifted to Carmilla's. "Can you tell me if my tongue is like peeling?" Carmilla rolled her eyes.

"I can't believe I'm dating you." Carmilla muttered to herself. She sighed, and took a step forward. "Stick your tongue out." Laura obliged. "No, it's not peeling. You're safe." Laura let out a breath of relief.

"Oh thank god."

Carmilla smirked, and placed her hands on Laura's hips.

"You really need an update on how temperature works, huh?" Carmilla teased. Laura rolled her eyes and clasped her hands around Carmilla's neck. 

"I know some things." Laura replied. Carmilla cocked an eyebrow.

"Really?" She challenged. Laura nodded and hummed in response. "Like what?" 

"Like... I know you're hot." 

"Oh my god you are ridiculous." Carmilla muttered. Laura's lips quirked into a grin. 

"So are you gonna kiss me or what?"

"Hm... I don't know." Carmilla said, pretending to think over the idea. "Your tongue _did_ just experience a traumatic event." Laura's grin quickly turned into a pout.

"It didn't hurt _that_ bad..." She muttered. 

"Are you sure? Cause you put on quite the-"

"Just kiss me." Laura demanded. Carmilla chuckled and brought their lips together. Every time she kissed her it felt like the first; never failing to send her heart to race and nerves to enliven. But her thoughts drifted back to the message on the computer; what her mind was set on and what she intended to do. Carmilla pulled back.

"Actually." Carmilla said. "I'd like to watch that movie now." Laura's hands dropped to her shoulders.

"What? You weren't even watching it." 

"Sure I was." No she wasn't. "Now let's go and-"

"Do you not want to kiss me?" The words hurt much more than they should have.

"What? Of course I do." Carmilla retorted. "I always want to kiss you. Where'd you get that idea?" If she could just get her to see what's on that damned computer...

"Well... I mean usually when we watch a movie you have trouble keeping your hands off of me, and when you get spaced out you always tell me why. And I mean, now when we do kiss you want to go back to watching a movie? That you're not even watching?"

"I-"

"Carmilla I know you weren't watching it." 

Carmilla chewed on her bottom lip. This was _not_ how she wanted to tell Laura. She wanted it to be special; at least somehow special. She's always been spontaneous in this relationship; everything she's decided was on a whim, much like this one. But just this once she _really_ wishes she planned out something. 

"Can we give it a whirl?" Carmilla asked. Laura sighed, and nodded.

"Okay." She pecked Carmilla's cheek and walked back to the couch. Carmilla watched with a smirk as Laura opened the laptop. But moments passed and Laura sat and stared at the screen as though it didn't say anything.

"Are you coming?" Laura called to her.

"What?" Carmilla wondered out loud. Did she not read it? Was it not there? 

"To watch the movie. Are you coming? By the way, I think you accidentally clicked something because the movie was closed out, but don't worry. I got it back up." Carmilla's shoulders dropped and so did her inspiration. _Are you fucking-_ But Carmilla spotted the cookies cooling on the tray out of the corner of her eye. If that didn't work, maybe she could try something cuter and quirkier. She smirked.

"Yeah. Just give me a moment." She ignored Laura's huff and started breaking the cookies and arranging them in an order to say 'I love you.' Carmilla nearly puked at how cheesy it was, but Laura likes this kind of thing, and the smile that she's sure she'll have will be so worth it. 

"Hey Laura." She said, trying to keep her excitement at bay. "Can you look at this?" Laura huffed, and soon joined Carmilla in the kitchen. Laura crossed her arms, not even bothering to look at her masterpiece.

"Yeah?" Laura retorted. Then, the worst thing imaginable happened. Laura started picking cookies from the tray, not even looking at the words spelled out. Carmilla didn't even attempt to stop her jaw from dropping. "Is there a problem?" Laura asked, taking a bite of the cookie. "And why'd you break these up?" _Of course. Of course this happens_.

Carmilla stood stunned for a moment, watching as Laura tore away at the message without even seeing it. _Hopeless. This is utterly hopeless._

"I just." She let out an exasperated sigh. "The cookies weren't hot anymore, and I figured if I broke them up they'd get more air in them and cool down faster." Laura quirked an eyebrow, but seemed to drop it.

"Perfect. Ready to watch the movie now?"

"Yep."

Laura smiled, and they re-positioned themselves on the lounge chair. Carmilla sighed. _God damn it Laura._

They were about an hour into the movie now and Carmilla was having the hardest of times paying attention. Nothing. Nothing was working. And now every time Carmilla tried to talk Laura would shut her up and tell her to watch the movie. Carmilla sighed. There has to be something, right? Some way she can profess her love without screwing it up. She should just get it tattooed on her body... Wait a second.

An idea, one certainly idiotic and typical, hit her mind. Carmilla smiled wickedly.

"Be right back gotta piss." Carmilla said curtly as she jumped off the lounge chair.

"Oh... Kay?" 

Carmilla rushed into her room and closed the door. _Pen, pen. Where's a pen?_ Carmilla searched around for a bit, discarding the tank top she was wearing as she did so. _There's a marker- that'll do._ Carmilla snatched the black marker from her desk and wrote 'I love you' on her stomach. She looked in the mirror proudly. There- that should do it. Carmilla grabbed a button-up shirt, and slipped it on. Mid-way through whatever the hell they're watching, she planned, Carmilla will pop open her shirt and reveal the hidden message. She gave herself a nod before walking back out into the living room, Laura's adorable puzzled expression on her face.

"You good?" She asked. Carmilla nodded.

"Perfect." Carmilla slipped back onto the lounge chair, curling her arm around Laura's shoulders as usual.

20 minutes later and Carmilla thinks this must be the worst idea she's had yet. With the month turning May and the weather growing warm, Carmilla was desperately missing her tank top. Additionally, having Laura (who manages to always be warm) tucked into her side was making this heat worse. If she didn't do it soon, she's sure she'd die from a heatstroke (maybe a little exaggeration there).

She was about to ask to pause the movie, when Laura spoke.

"Did you change into this particular shirt on purpose?" Laura asked, eyes still trained on the screen. Carmilla cocked an eyebrow, fearing Laura figured out her master plan.

"What do you mean?" She replied. Laura shrugged, and placed her hand on Carmilla's thigh, running gentle patterns up and down her skin though Carmilla was too focused on saying 'I love you' that she didn't care for it.

"This was the shirt you wore when we first..." Laura flashed Carmilla a mischievous grin. "You know." Carmilla's eyebrows shot way to her hairline. Was it? Carmilla peeked down at her shirt. _Oh fuck it is_. But that wasn't her intention for wearing this- far from it. However before she got a chance to reply Laura's lips were attached to hers. Whether the laptop was on the floor or thrown into the air it didn't matter because Laura was straddling her with her hands in Carmilla's hair. Carmilla's hands automatically landed on Laura's waist, gripping her hips like handles. 

After a while, the words written on her stomach were forgotten. Laura was too good with her lips and tongue to ever remember. And the way her hips rocked in Carmilla's hands was oh-so enticing. 

It wasn't until Laura started unbuttoning Carmilla's shirt that the words were recalled, but by the time Carmilla remembered it was too late. As Laura went to push Carmilla's shirt off her shoulders, she spotted the writing. Carmilla looked down- horrified. It was now blotched and stained from the sweat, looking like someone dumped a bucket of watercolor paint on Carmilla's stomach, the words gone. _Oh are you fucking-_

"Did you..." Laura leaned back on her heels. "Write on yourself?" Laura asked as she examined the blotched writing.

"I..." There was no way out of this one. Carmilla sighed. "Yeah." Laura's eyes met hers again.

"Why the hell did you do that?" Now- now would be the perfect time. She's been waiting all night and all she wanted to say was I love you. She's accepted now that the harder she tries the worst it's going to get, and clearly not even fucking writing on herself will do the trick so she's just going to have to buckle down and do it.

"Laura I-"

"STOP THE LESBIAN SEX WE'RE HOME!" JP called out as the front door swung open. Carmilla clenched her hand into a fist.

"... hate this place so much." Carmilla muttered. She sighed and started to re-do the buttons to her shirt. Brandy's head popped up from the reiling.

"Ah hah! They weren't having sex. You owe me twenty." Brandy declared with a smug grin. Carmilla rolled her eyes. _Here we go again._

"What? No way." A few more hops up the steps and JP's face appeared. "Oh- come on."

"I'll be expecting that twenty soon." Brandy said.

"Weren't you guys supposed to be out clubbing all night?" Carmilla grumbled as Laura swung her leg back over, sitting beside her now. She was so close to saying it...

"We were, but then there was this guy playing the cello. And he was, like, rocking it. Right JP?" JP hummed in agreement. "And then we got distracted, and well one thing led to another and now we both are taking cello classes."

"I swear whenever you two are together you end up doing the most bizarre of things." Carmilla muttered. _And you also ruin EVERYTHING_. Carmilla kept that inside though.

"Oh shit." He sniffed. "Did you make cookies?" JP asked, rushing to the kitchen.

"Holy- no fucking way." Brandy said, following suit. It was Attack on Cookies as soon as they both reached the tray. "Man, having Laura here is the best. I've had like," Brandy popped a cookie in her mouth, "15 cookies every day since you started dating Laura. And look at this," she lifted the hem of her shirt, "I've gotten a little chub wub!"

"She's gotten a little chub wub!" JP echoed, patting her stomach to make a beat. Carmilla and Laura shared a look, both smirking slightly.

"Are you sure you guys aren't drunk?" Laura called out. They both laughed and continued their feast. Laura sighed, and met Carmilla's gaze once more.

"I guess that's my cue, huh?" Laura said. Carmilla was next to sigh. There has to be something she can do. She made up her mind on telling Laura tonight, and if she doesn't do exactly that, she knows she'll be kicking herself in the ass. Or rather, JP and Brandy in the ass.

"I suppose." Carmilla admitted in defeat. "Let me walk you out?"

"Always the chivalrous one." 

Laura slipped on her shoes, Carmilla dreaded every second until she walked Laura out the door, the warm spring air hitting their skin. The streets were mostly empty now as it always is around this time of night. It was quiet, reminding Carmilla of the words she's wanted to say all night, echoing down the alleys of her mind. 

"I'll call you when I get home." Laura placed a peck on her cheek. "Love you." She said, oh so casually. So much so that Carmilla almost didn't take in her words.

"Wait wait what?" Carmilla said. Laura cocked an eyebrow.

"What?" Did she seriously not know?

"You just... You just said you love me."

"Yeah. I figured you were going to try and make it a big event, or say it in some grand gesture. So I wanted to make it casual. Figured I'd say it before you tried to make it special." Laura replied. Carmilla stared into her honey brown eyes, completely stunned. "Well, say it back." Laura said, snapping her out of her daze.

"Say it back? I've been trying to say it all night! I've been trying to make it special all night."

Laura knit her brows.

"What?" She muttered.

"Yeah. I typed it on the computer-"

"That's what that tab was about?"

"I tried to write it with the cookies-"

"That's why you broke them apart."

"And then I tried to write it on myself-"

"The smudged writing." Laura's jaw hang loose though her smile still remained. "Oh... My god." Laura muttered, clasping her hand over her mouth for a moment. 

"Mhm." Carmilla replied. Laura placed her hands on Carmilla's hips.

"You still haven't said it though." Laura teased. Carmilla rolled her eyes and cupped Laura's cheeks, a smile of her own forming.

"Laura Hollis."

"Carmilla Karnstein." 

"I love you." The words have never felt so good to say.

"I love you too." And they never sounded so sweet. "Guess that's why we're together, huh?" Laura muttered as Carmilla pulled her in for a kiss.

"Yeah." 

  

**First Anniversary**

 

Laura has never been one to celebrate "anniversaries". To her, they were always an anniversary to a something that was, or what could have been. But with Carmilla, she was willing to change that. Starting with their 9 month anniversary. Laura would've done it during their one year, but they had their first date on Christmas and were officially girlfriends on New Years; that's too much celebration. 

Even for Laura.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura had the whole evening planned out. And, if she starts it like that you'd think a nice dinner at some fancy Italian restaurant, or a night with fancy champagne. But Carmilla and Laura's relationship was anything but fancy. Most nights they spend together are in the other's apartment in their pj's, or at the park. They've done romantic stuff, sure. They've had one of those nice, fancy, romantic evenings full of passion and amore. But most of their relationship was just... Simple. And Laura figured why change that? 

With a book wrapped in plain blue wrapping tucked under her arm, Laura knocked on Carmilla's apartment door. Through the open window, Laura could here Mircalla meowing and Carmilla muttering curses under her breath. Laura pulled out her phone. It was only 11 o'clock. Carmilla never falls asleep that early, and Laura could tell she was asleep because she only mutters that many curse words when she just wakes up.

After a couple of moments, the door swung open, revealing Carmilla with a bed head and sleepy eyes. 

"Mornin' cupcake." Carmilla murmured. Laura cocked an eyebrow.

"It's eleven o'clock at night." 

Carmilla peeked her head out the door and looked around for a moment. She sighed, and leaned back inside. 

"I haven't had my coffee yet. I don't know what I'm doing." Carmilla leaned against the doorframe. "Wanna come in?" Laura shook her head.

"I won't be long." Laura pulled the gift tucked tightly in her arm and handed it to Carmilla. "Got you this." Carmilla cocked her head slightly, and grabbed the gift from her hand.

"One, what is this for? And two, you know I don't like gifts." 

Laura smiled.

"One, it's for our 9 month anniversary. And two, I know but it wouldn't be an anniversary if I didn't get you something." Laura replied. Carmilla smirked. 

"You should have informed me that we're celebrating this. I would've gotten you something." Laura pointed her jaw to the gift.

"Open it." She said, biting down on her lip to stop her smile. Carmilla eyed Laura strangely for a moment, but with a yawn and a shake to her head, she slowly started to peel open the package. One thing Laura has always noticed is she's always careful with things that are given to her; especially with wrappings. She always delicately takes them apart like they're made of glass or some precious gem. It was adorable, something that Laura has always admired of Carmilla. But right now, it only heightened Laura's excitement.

After what seemed like ages (seriously Laura could have developed a cure for cancer in the time she took to peel the wrapping), Carmilla finally held the book clean in her hands. A wide smile formed on her face.

"You... Are the best damned thing that has ever happened to me. I swear to god." 

"So... You like it?" Laura questioned. Carmilla locked eyes with Laura again. Laura knew that Carmilla was never one to show too much emotion, mainly because she never knew how to handle them when they got overwhelming, so this was a good sign.

"Besides you, this is the best present to ever exist." Carmilla stepped out and wrapped her arm around Laura's shoulders, pulling her in for a hug. Laura gladly coiled her arms around Carmilla's waist.

"Wait. What do you mean besides me?" Laura asked, pulling away. Carmilla shrugged.

"You're a gift to this world, Laura. I'm just lucky I got to have some part of it." 

Laura but her lip in a failed attempt to stop her smile from widening. She shook her head to herself.

"You're supposed to be the one who can't stop her smile; not me."

Carmilla shrugged.

"Yeah, well. Funny the way things work out, huh?"

Laura smiled and pecked Carmilla's cheek. 

"Happy 9 month anniversary, Carm." 

"Tell me what we're celebrating next time, creampuff." Carmilla teased. Laura rolled her eyes, and brought their lips together.

 

**First Time Meeting the Family**

 

You'd expect after being together for 11 months that Laura might have met Carmilla's siblings; maybe once. But it hadn't happened yet, and when Carmilla got the news that Mattie and Will were visiting, she couldn't wait for her girlfriend and siblings to meet.

 

**Laura**

 

Meeting Carmilla's siblings was something that Laura was extremely nervous about. She only ever caught that one glimpse of Matska in the store window, and she never really met William when they were kids since he was always away at military school. So actually sitting down and having a conversation with them was something Laura was more than stoked about. 

Carmilla and Laura stood in Carmilla's room, waiting for Matska and William to arrive. Carmilla said to keep her outfit simple, which she did. A simple blue button up t-shirt with dark grey jeans. Simple. But Laura still felt a little conscious about it, because what if it was too simple.

"Are you sure this is okay?" Laura asked, eyeing herself in the mirror. Even while she's in the bathroom Laura could hear Carmilla sigh.

"Laura I am currently perfecting my eyeliner I can not risk this conversation right now." Carmilla called back. Laura chuckled and shook her head to herself. Laura fidgeted with the collar of her shirt. Maybe this was too much- or was it too little. Last time she saw Matska, she looked glorious; really owned the place that she stood. What if she comes dressed like that and Laura is dressed like this?

Laura groaned and jumped face down onto Carmilla's bed. 

She just wants to impress them. Matska is some millionaire and William is a military guy, and here's Laura, studying to be a journalist and barely making it through college. She felt Carmilla straddle her back, her strong hands massaging her shoulders.

"What's got you so tense, my love?" Her words purred, soothing her in the way only she can. _My love._ That's a new nickname Carmilla had picked up on recently, and god did Laura love it. Laura sighed.

"Your family." She muttered. The next thing that came out of her mouth was a hum at the ungodly work of Carmilla's hands. "Keep doing that." She heard Carmilla chuckle.

"Not if you're going to fall asleep." 

"I won't." Laura quickly said, though she certainly could. Laura hummed again. Was it even fair for her to be this good with her hands? Well, she knows from certain... Experiences, just how impossibly wonderful they are, but now wasn't the time to dwell over that fact. Especially when their were three slow knocks on the door. Laura groaned.

"Can we just forget about this whole, meeting your siblings thing and have you massage my back instead?" Laura muttered, another groan fleeing her lips as Carmilla's hands left her shoulders.

"As much as I love hearing your little hums of happiness, you really do have to meet my siblings." The weight on the bed shifted and Carmilla was no longer on her back. With a sigh, Laura jumped off the bed and stretched her arms above her head. It was only moments after Carmilla escaped out of the bedroom door that the front one flung open, an enthusiastic "Mattie!" Soon following. Laura sighed.

She really shouldn't be getting jealous that Carmilla's never that enthusiastic to see her, but here she is...

 

**Carmilla**

 

So far, things seemed to be going great. Not-so-cheap champagne, wine glasses, wide smiles and polite conversation, Mattie and William sitting on the couch whilst Laura and Carmilla took place on the lounge chair. William had changed so much since the last time Carmilla saw him; he had a beard now, which was odd. His hair had grown out; which too, was odd. Mattie, however, hadn't changed a bit; and she loved that. Laura though... She's definitely different when she's trying to impress people, she supposes. Either that or Laura is jealous. But that's crazy, right?

"Oh my gosh. Tell her about the fishing trip." Carmilla said, taking a sip of wine. There were so many good times Carmilla has had with Mattie, and she wants Laura to know every single one of them. 

"I mustn't!" Mattie exclaimed.

"Oh please do! You tell the story better than anyone." Carmilla pleaded. With a sigh, Mattie shrugged a shoulder.

"I suppose this once for your girlfriend."

Carmilla smiled.

"You're going to love this." Carmilla said to Laura, though Laura's eyes were trained on Mattie. What the hell was that about? 

"So Carmilla, William, and I were all on my yacht-"

"Yacht? Really?" Laura scoffed. Carmilla's eyes widened. What- what no. Oh no- that's not good that can't be a good sign.

"Is that a problem?" Mattie asked. No- no no no. Carmilla knows well enough to know that response isn't good either. She told the other to be on their best behavior; she wanted to impress Laura with her siblings as much as she wanted Laura to impress her siblings. 

"Nope. Not at all. Just an observation." She's heard that exact line a million times before; and each time Laura was secretly pissed off or extremely bothered by something. Stealthily, Carmilla slipped her hand into her pocket, making it so that it buzzed. Carmilla gave a polite smile to her siblings.

"Would you excuse us for a moment? I was actually expecting a phone call as such." She smiled warmly down at Laura, who's glare still remained fixated on Mattie. "Laura. Would you like to join me?"

"I actually-"

"Fantastic." Carmilla switched off the alarm and grabbed Laura's hand. She slipped away into her bedroom and made sure she closed the door before looking back to Laura, who sat down with a scowl on the edge of the bed. "What are you doing?" Carmilla whispered. Laura shrugged.

"Getting along with big sister Matska." Laura replied curtly. Carmilla rolled her eyes. 

"Clearly not well."

"Yeah." She scoffed. "Clearly." Carmilla sighed, and plopped down next to Laura.

"What's gotten you so... Bitter?"

"I'm not bitter." She suddenly snapped. Carmilla cocked an eyebrow. "Okay, maybe I'm a little bitter..."

"Why? Did she do something?" Carmilla questioned. Laura shook her head. "Did William do something?" Another shake. "Was it something one of them said?" She shook her head once more. "Then what is it?" Laura sighed.

"You're just... You're not the same when you're not the same. I barely know who you were as soon as they walked through the door." Laura stared down at her hands in her lap. 

"What do you mean by that?" Carmilla replied. Laura shrugged.

"You're different." 

"I'm different around everybody."

"Yeah, well. Not like this." Laura sighed. 

"I'm different around you." Carmilla said. Laura slowly dragged her gaze to meet Carmilla's. "I'm not all... Sensitive, and caring around everyone else. I'm a, as you love to put it, _grumpy grump_." She tok success in the small smirk that tugged on Laura's lips. "With Mattie and William, I'm, you know, the little sister. I'm a different version of myself when I'm around them but I'm still me." Laura nodded.

"I know." She sighed. "God I know. But how am I supposed to react when you're sitting there with a smile I've never seen and you're all 'hey remember that time when we ate half of the food in Saigon? Fun times.' When I can barely get you to leave the city for a day with me. It's like... I don't even know you." Carmilla was next to sigh. She knows that Laura doesn't have any siblings so she couldn't possibly understand what it's like. Carmilla swung her arm around Laura's shoulders.

"If JP asked me to watch Doctor Who I wouldn't. When you asked me to, I did." Carmilla was always terrible with words, but she's willing to try and bring Laura's smile back all the while proving a point. 

"That's different." Laura retorted.

"How so?" Carmilla asked. "I love him and I love you."

"You love him in a different way." As soon as she spoke the words it seemed to hit her. Carmilla gestured her hand as if to say 'there you go'. "Oh." Laura chuckled bashfully. "So I just made a scene for nothing?"

"Basically." 

Then, a knock at the door. 

"Yeah?" Carmilla called out. The door slowly creaked open, standing there Mattie and William.

"Long story short we were eaves dropping through the door." William said.

"Satisfying curiosity as the door spoke to us." Mattie corrected. Carmilla smiled and rolled her eyes. Mattie always had a way with words.

"Anyway. We heard what you said." 

"Indeed. How about we start over? I know a great Greek restaurant in Salzburg." Mattie offered. Carmilla looked to Laura, hoping she'd agree. Laura pursed her lips to the side for a moment, but a small smirk soon formed.

"You know? I think I'd like that."

Carmilla let out a breath of relief. 

So, the night went on. Carmilla was glad that the three of the people she loves the most in her life could all get along. And, yeah. Maybe Laura was a little insecure, but Carmilla could understand that. But, as long as it worked out in the end, Carmilla didn't mind that so much.

 

**First Apartment**

 

The first day in their apartment didn't go as planned; really, like this whole relationship nothing has ever gone as planned. But, nonetheless it managed to work out in the end- sort of.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura sighed with content as she brought in the final box. Carmilla and Laura have been together for two years now, and each day it feels like that first moment they've gotten together. She's never once failed to entertain Laura, or bring a smile to her face. Each kiss was always purposeful, always touching each other like it was their last time they'd ever see each other. 

Laura eyed the walls to their room for a moment. The apartment wasn't too small nor too big; a step down from the kitchen to the living room, a guest room, their own room with a conjoined bathroom. Next to there room was a balcony with sliding glass doors- something Laura planned on making a bit more nicer, somewhere for Carmilla to read her books while still getting some sun. Or a place to hang out with friends maybe; it was certainly big enough. Slender arms wrapped around her waist as a body pressed against hers, the lips she knows all too well brushing past her ear. 

"Le soleil, mon amour, ne pourrait jamais se comparer à la lumière qui apporte votre sourire." She muttered, before nibbling on her ear. Laura smirked and blushed slightly.

"You know it makes me weak in the knees when you speak french." Laura replied. Carmilla hummed in response.

"If only you knew what I was saying." She murmured, voice low and inviting, sending a shiver down Laura's spine. 

"So are we all- oh come on!" Lafontaine exclaimed. Laura peeked over Carmilla's shoulder to see Lafontaine standing at the doorway, though Carmilla insisted on keeping her arms wrapped around her waist.

"What are they doing now?" Danny called.

"Can't keep their hands off of each other- nothing knew." Lafontaine called back.

"You owe me ten!" She heard Brandy say.

"You can't be serious!" JP called back. Laura rolled her eyes.

"I'll give you guys some privacy." Lafontaine said with a wink, then shutting the door. Carmilla and Laura were honestly so lucky to have friends like them; almost everyone came to help out. Perry would've, but she had to do something involving one of her jobs. Kirsch would have too, but he had class. Everyone else, however, was there.

"At least _someone_ is willing to give us privacy." Carmilla said, her lips running wild along Laura's neck.

"Do you think we have time?" Laura asked, knowing that tone in Carmilla's voice meant one thing on her mind.

"I think we'd have all the time in the world if you locked the door."

With the way Carmilla was sucking on her neck just then, there was no chance she would be able to say no.

"I'm on it." 

 

**Carmilla**

 

A couple hours later, and everyone had cleared out of their apartment. Everyone including Laura. Which, normally, Carmilla would be dismal about. But tonight, she had something special planned.

With the apartment barely put together, it only made what she had in mind easier; painting their room. 

She's painted her own room before; it couldn't be too hard to do it again. She even bought Laura's favorite shade of Yellow, and was wearing a white t and white shorts, specially in case paint happens to drop onto her clothes. Carmilla aligned tape alone the floors and walls before opening the first can. It reeked; smelt of something terrible. But, despite the dizziness from the strong smell, Carmilla grabbed a brush and began to paint the first coat.

One wall was barely painted before Carmilla's muscles ached. Seriously; who knew painting took so much energy and stamina? Maybe a break won't hurt. 

Carmilla cracked open a beer and took a small break on the floor, but as soon as she leaned back against the wall she regretted it. _Wall- that's. Okay. Just painted that wall._ Carmilla grimaced as she took a step forward, but simply sighed. She bought these clothes for this exact reason. No big deal. 

Carmilla sighed, and settled on the floor on the ground, leaning back against the bed as she took another long sip of her beer. _God... I don't even like beer. How does Laura drink this?_ Nonetheless, she found herself downing it anyway. 

When her muscles no longer ached, Carmilla moved to her feet. Her jaw dropped and eyes widened in a moment of horror as she realized the paint on her back had stained the bed frame. Okay- okay she can fix this. She just needs to paint the whole entire bed frame yellow. Laura likes yellow; something to match the walls.

20 minutes later and the mattress was now on the floor, Carmilla rounding her second bottle of beer as she finally completed the first coat of yellow paint on the bed frame. _There- fixed._ To Carmilla, it looked god awfully yellow. But Laura likes yellow; it's her favorite color. 

Carmilla smiled and placed her hands on her hips. Okay- now to refocus on the walls. Carmilla downed the rest of her beer and got back to painting the first coat again on that first wall, climbing on and off the chair she had set up to get the very tops. 

Maybe it was the beer in her system or maybe life just wanted to fuck her over again, but something made Carmilla go off balance and she surged forward on the chair, hands landing on the wet paint on the wall. Carmilla gasped and immediately withdrew her hands. She sighed. _No biggie- just gotta repaint the hand prints. Now my hands on the other hand..._ Carmilla groaned.

She's going to be another beer.

Fifth beer down and Carmilla, has the second wall painted down. Life seemed to want to screw her over again, because as she went to grab her beer she tripped over the leg of the chair as if it was sticking it's foot out. Luckily, her hands landed flat on their dresser. She smirked victoriously.

"Hah. Screw you chair." She said, her words drawn out. She can't be _that_ tipsy, right? As Carmilla pulled her hands back another look of pure horror coated her face. 

Yellow. Yellow hand prints. On the dresser. 

"Oh... Fuck." She muttered. How the hell were her hands still wet? "Nope, nope okay." She thought out loud. "I can fix this." And so, Carmilla painted the dresser yellow. Yellow bed frame and yellow dresser. A bit excessive? Quite possibly. God, why did everything in this room had to be so white? She's going to need another beer.

7th beer down and Carmilla has fucked up again. Working on the third wall, standing on a chair, paint bucket held tightly to her stomach as she coated the walls. She reached up on her tippy toes to paint the tops, but, as though the world truly hated her, Carmilla fell backwards, the paint splattering all over her as she landed on her back. She's sure that would have hurt more if she didn't have 7 beers in her system. 

Carmilla groaned, torso shrouded in yellow, a splatter of the devil's color behind her. Carmilla looked in horror as she saw an outline of herself in yellow on the hardwood floor. No no. No no. She can fix this, she can- Trip, into the closet. More paint going everywhere. She can fix that. She can fix all of it.

God, she definitely needs more beer for this.

 

**Laura**

 

Laura finally returned to her new apartment after a long shift from her job at the local newspaper. It was a small job; simply going around and collecting stories about someone finding their lost cat or some man reaching the age of 96. But, it was a start to her journalism career; that she was grateful for.

"Honey I'm home!" Laura teased. "Told you I'd be the one to say it first!" That was a running joke between the two; who would be the one to return home from work and shout the infamous line. But when she wasn't greeted back Laura grew worried. "Carmilla you home?" Laura kicked off her shoes and tossed off her jacket. She heard muffled sobs coming from one of the rooms. "Carmilla?" Laura called out. She followed the sounds, leading her to their room. Her jaw dropped as she opened the door.

Yellow. Everything- yellow. The mattress, the bed, the closet, the walls, the floor, the dresser, the ceiling, the girlfriend. Everything. Everything was painted yellow. Carmilla sat in one corner, empty bottles of beer around, paint splattered over nearly every part of her body. Laura looked  down at the floor, not sure if it was still wet.

"Uh, Carmilla?"

Carmilla simply took another sip of a beer, sobs soon coming.

"It's dry." She muttered, burying her head in her free hand. Still, Laura tapped her foot around to make sure before walking all the way inside. 

"What the hell happened in here?" Laura questioned. She wasn't sure wether to laugh or cry with Carmilla, because seeing Carmilla sobbing with a bottle of beer and completely covered in paint was so comical, but yet, kinda sad.

"Oh I don't know what the hell happened creampuff." Laura knelt down in front of her. "I- I just wanted to do something nice. I was gonna paint the walls yellow, but then I got my hands wet." Carmilla plopped down her beer and flashed Laura her yellow-stained hands. "And then I kept touching every thing and drinking beer and everything just turned yellow. I didn't know what to do so I painted everything yellow. Everything I touch turns yellow." Carmilla broke into sobs as Laura did her best to stifle her laughter. Carmilla was so distressed that it was hard not to laugh. "I can't even touch you." She whined in the poutiest voice Laura had ever heard. Laura's hand flew to her chest as an 'awe' flew from her lips.

"You can touch me." Laura replied. Carmilla shook her head and sniffled.

"Everything I touch turns yellow. I don't want you to be yellow! Then you'll disappear into this room because everything is yellow and I don't want to lose you." Laura bit her lip to stop her laughter. 

"I'm not gonna disappear." She said with a chuckle. 

"Yes you are! As soon as I touch you, poof! You'll be yellow. I can't even distinguish the floor from the wall because it's all the same color."

"I think that's just the alcohol, babe." Laura cupped Carmilla's cheek. 

"No! You're gonna disappear!" Carmilla whacked Laura's hand away and fell to the floor. Laura couldn't stop her laughter anymore as Carmilla groaned, beer bottles rolling around her. 

"See?" She said with her laughter. "I didn't disappear." Carmilla sniffled, and with Laura's help, got back into an upright position. Carmilla wiped away the tears forming in her eyes with the back of her hand. Laura actually thought Carmilla might have calmed down. Just for a second though.

"I failed you!" Carmilla whined only a moment after. Laura broke out into giggles again.

"You did not fail me." Laura comforted. She looked around the room. God, this was insanely yellow. "I... Love yellow." If she's being honest her favorite color changed months ago; she just never had the heart to tell Carmilla, because everything she's ever bought her, if given the opportunity, was yellow-themed. "It's a great color." Carmilla sniffled again.

"You think so?" 

Laura nodded.

"Yeah, yeah. Of course I do." Laura smiled. "Come on. Why don't you jump in the shower and get changed into something less... Yellow. Yeah?"

Carmilla nodded.

"Okay." She murmured. Laura helped Carmilla stagger to her feet. "I love you." 

"I know." 

So, it wasn't perfect at first. Especially with that. But, they did get new furniture, and the walls were repainted. Courtesy of JP and Brandy as long as Laura had sent them a photo of drunk, crying Carmilla, which Carmilla was all for once she heard of the offer. So it all worked out in the end; just like everything does. 

  

**The Marriage Proposal**

 

What a night that was. For Carmilla, it had to be the most frustrating of all. She loved Laura; loved her to death. But when she's a nervous wreck and all she wants to do is propose to the girl, she really wished she wasn't so oblivious. 

 

**Carmilla**

 

"So tonight's the night, huh?" Lafontaine asked with a shit-eating grin. Lafontaine, Kirsch, JP, and Carmilla were all getting ready in their suits and (bow) ties. Since JP and Brandy were part of a golfing club (really, no one knows when the hell that started or how the hell), they got invited to a yearly dinner and were told they could bring a couple of friends. They may have over stayed their welcome with that, bringing the whole crew, but none of them were complaining. It was a beautiful place, and from what Carmilla has heard, the food was great. So, like all of her decisions, she spontaneously figured it might as well be tonight.

Carmilla smiled, and adjusted the tie around her neck.

"Tonight's the night." Carmilla replied. She always hated the way her smile looked; and having to stare at herself in this damned mirror didn't help, but it's not like she could wipe it off anyway.

"I'm so proud of you, bro. Like, you're gonna buckle down and do it." Kirsch said, clearly struggling with his red bow tie which really added to this 'puppy-dog' look he always has. 

"If I can get through it without puking, I'll be proud of me too." Carmilla finally fitted her tie around her neck. As she played with the cufflinks and looked at herself, she had to admit, she did look good. Carmilla wore a black twill suit with a dark glaucous blue button-up shirt underneath sported by a black tie. 

"I'm sure you'll do just fine." JP reassured. "I mean, y'all have been together for, what? Four years now." He ran his hand down his tie. "You've probably done things a lot more terrifying." Carmilla smirked slightly and started setting her hair every which way, looking for the perfect angle.

"Yeah but this has to be the most terrifying. I mean, I'm finally proposing." Jesus, will her hair just find that perfect side? "That's huge, really big. And what if she says no?"

"She's not going to." The three said at the same time, startling everyone. 

"Whoa. That was like, a bro moment." Kirsch said.

"Hey. Panicking over here if you don't recall." Carmilla started fidgeting with her tie. "Tuck in or tuck out?"

"What, are you a dweeb? Tuck in." JP replied. Carmilla sighed. _He's right- tuck in._ Carmilla pursed her lips to the side and leaned closer to the mirror. But her hair... 

"Okay, hair over one shoulder? Or hair over both shoulders? Or hair behind the shoulders? And should I push it out of my face or should I-"

"Carmilla." Lafontaine said, cutting her off. "As soon as you whip out that ring Laura's not gonna give a damn about your hair or your tie. Just..." They sighed. "Relax and do you." 

"Relax and do me." Carmilla echoed. "I can do that." It only took a moment for that to break down. "Oh god I can't do that please help!"

 

**Laura**

 

"Do you think she'll like it?" Laura asked.

"Of course she will." Perry said.

"No doubt in my mind she will, Hollis." Danny added.

"If she doesn't she's insane. Extremely insane." Brandy said next.

"Yeah, Laura. I've heard you lamenting about her in class for four years; if she doesn't like it then I swear on everything I have I will drag her by the hair to her grave and toss her in a coffin of her own blood." Betty replied.

"That's a little violent, Betty." Perry retorted.

"Yeah well. You didn't hear her huffing and groaning in class every three seconds." 

Laura sighed, their words and comforts becoming this blend of background noise as she could only focus on the one thing jutting out of her blazer pocket.

She just hopes they're right about this.

 

**Carmilla**

 

With their group being so large, they actually managed to get their own table. It was long with cheap white covering over the wooden table. The event was held outside in a tent, the cool summer air hanging in the atmosphere, light chatter creating the background noise, boisterous laughter from drunken tables and fine wines all over the place. 

"Kirsch, I'm just saying you're wearing a grey tux. If you spill sauce on it I'm not cleaning it up." Danny says, though Carmilla can barely focus on whatever conversations are happening around her. All that she could focus on was the little black box sitting in her pocket. She soon slipped away into the thoughts consuming her mind like a slow spreading disease. They grew like a tumor in her brain; insecurities and doubts clouding her mind and keeping her silent in this room she's locked herself up in. The key, she quickly realized, was sitting right next to her, as all it took was a grasp on her hand and she was back.

"Are you okay?" Laura asked softly. Carmilla nodded.

"Oh, yeah. Just, uh, a lot on my mind." _Particularly, a big shiny rock sitting in my pocket._ Laura doddered her head, and kissed the back of Carmilla's hand. Carmilla, for the sake of... Science, eyed her girlfriend and hopefully soon-to-be fiancee. Laura wore a white blouse, covering it a blazer. Tights ran up her legs, underneath a black pencil skirt that hugged her legs. Laura's hair was tied up in some sort of fancy bun behind her head, loose strands flowing down the sides of her cheeks.

"You look amazing tonight, by the way." Carmilla commented, adoring the way Laura's cheeks turned a slight shade of pink. Four years of being together, and she still blushes every time Carmilla hands her a compliment.

"Shut the fuck up you loser." Laura muttered. Carmilla laughed. There was so much to adore, so much to love; all her little quirks and habits. It only reminded Carmilla of the ring sitting in her pocket. "Are you sure you're alright?" Carmilla perked up. This could be the perfect chance; escape down one of the trails and propose. Carmilla did her best to fight off the smirk threatening to play on her lips.

"Actually, can we go for a walk?" 

Laura nodded.

"Of course." 

 

**Laura**

 

The way Carmilla was acting made her highly nervous; highly nervous that someone told Carmilla what she had planned.

That plan being a little black box in her blazer pocket.

 

**Carmilla**

 

It was silent for the first couple of minutes that they escaped the table, walking along one of the trails. It was dark out; barely a slither of the crescent moon showing, the buzz of the nightly bugs humming and chirping, stars and planets alike as they danced across the sky. Laura abruptly stopped in her tracks, Carmilla stopped suit as she stood in front of her.

"You look like you're going to pass out all night." Laura muttered. Oh shit- was it that obvious?

"What do you mean?" Carmilla managed to reply cooly. Laura reached her free hand up and traced her fingertips down Carmilla's cheek.

"You're paler than usual." She murmured, moving to her lips. "Even your lips don't have the same color as they normally do." Her fingertips dragged down across her neck, her eyes following. "The tendons in your neck are strained," to her shoulder they go, "you're shoulders are hunched," down her arm and lacing with her hand, "and you're squeezing my hands harder than usual." Now that it was pointed out, Carmilla realized how tense she really was. "What's gotten into you tonight?" Carmilla chewed on the inside of her cheek. She could do it now; rid of all of her nerves. But she wanted the moment to be just right; timed perfectly so it wasn't rushed nor drawled out. Carmilla wore her cunning smile.

"Would it be weird if I said you're so pretty I'm actually nervous?" 

"No. But it would be lying." Damn. How does she always know? There has to be a way she could distract her, right? Someway she could make her believe she was fine just until the reason she wasn't popped out of her pocket. Carmilla's arms slyly slipped around Laura's waist. 

"Okay, you caught me." Laura quirked an eyebrow and placed her hands on Carmilla's shoulders. Carmilla leaned down, her lips slightly brushing past Laura's ear in the way she knows drives her insane. "Maybe I brought you out here because I want you all to myself." She brought in her good old friend seduction to deliver that line, kissing along her neck. She knew she won when one arm coiled around her shoulders and the other landed in her hair. 

"Wait wait." Fuck. "You were queazy over that?" Need to distract her better. Carmilla trailed her lips down to Laura's collarbone to make up for a response. "Carmilla." Carmilla sighed, and picked her head out of Laura's neck.

"Can't I just kiss you?" Laura's hand slid onto her cheek.

"You can do a lot of other things..." Laura said. Carmilla smiled. "But not now." And now Carmilla's pouting. Carmilla groaned heavily. "You have to tell me what's wrong first, then we can." _I don't want to do those things right now; I want to propose to you._ Carmilla looked up to the night sky. "Holy shit." 

"What?" Carmilla asked, her vision immediately snapped back down to Laura. Laura placed her fingertips on Carmilla's neck.

"Your heart beat is through the roof." Laura said, her eyes wide. _Fuck fuck fuck._

"Because you're here with me." God damn it. It's hard to find a perfect moment when her nerves are explosive. _Thump thump thump._ It's relentless now in the way it beats, not taking a moment of rest, echoing inside her ears.

"Please don't tell me someone told you." Laura muttered. Carmilla tilted her head to the side.

"Tell me what?" Carmilla questioned. With her nerves already so high it was easy for concern to kick in. "Oh god, are you okay?"

"Are you?" Laura retorted.

"Are you?" Carmilla shot back.

"Are you okay?"

"What about you?"

"I'm fine are you fine?"

"I'm fine are you fine?" Carmilla replied. So many things were happening that she just dropped down on one knee. She was surprised when Laura did too. "What are you doing?" Carmilla asked.

"What are you doing?" Laura retorted. Carmilla eyed her strangely. _Well, it's too late to turn back now_. As Carmilla pulled out her box, Laura pulled out another.

"The fuck is that?" Carmilla asked.

"What do you mean the fuck is this. The fuck is that?" And then, it hit them both like lightning. They both looked down at the other's boxes, their knees, then back to each other's eyes. "Were you about to propose?"

"I mean... Kinda." Carmilla replied. "Were you?" 

"I mean..." She huffed. "Well, kinda." Laura said. They both paused for a moment.

"So... We were both going to propose tonight?" Carmilla said, her words drawled out. Laura's eyes darted down to her box, then Carmilla's.

"I... I guess so." Then, it was a competition. Both of them whipped open their boxes, exclaiming in unison;

"Will you marry me?" 

"Oh my fucking god." Carmilla groaned, giving up completely as she dropped onto her back. "I give up. We're too in sync." Laura laughed, and suddenly, Carmilla did care again. Carmilla adjusted herself back on one knee.

"Stand up." Carmilla demanded.

"What? If you think for one second you're going to be the one that proposes to me you thought wrong." 

Carmilla sighed. She's not going to win; she's been with her long enough to know her stubborn ways- not that Carmilla was any less stubborn than her.

"Laura Hollis, will you please just marry me?" Carmilla said in an exasperated tone. Laura smiled.

"Carmilla Karnstein, will you please marry me first?" Laura retorted. Carmilla let out a long stream of a sigh.

"Slide on the rings at the same time?"

"Deal." Laura and Carmilla placed each other's rings on the others fingers.

"You know, this is usually the happiest moments of people's lives." Carmilla muttered. "Yet I feel like I fucked up."

"How did you fuck up?" Laura replied as Carmilla took the boxes, slipping them into her pocket.

"I should have proposed sooner, and now look at us? We just fought over who gets to propose to who and we're both kneeling on the ground. I just..." Carmilla sighed once more. "I wanted it to be special, you know? I wanted to see you with happy tears and bouncing around, barely being able to say 'oh my gosh' as I slipped the ring onto your finger." Laura sighed.

"Carmilla." She said softly. "Nothing in our relationship has been perfect." Laura replied, adding to the weight on Carmilla's heart. "But... That's what makes it perfect." Laura cupped Carmilla's chin, forcing her gaze to meet hers. "It's special in that way, you know?" A soft smile reached Carmilla's lips.

"How did I get so lucky?" Carmilla wondered out loud. Laura returned the smile. 

"I thought you didn't believe in luck." Laura said. Carmilla shrugged.

"It's the only explanation as to how I landed someone as perfect as you." She was pleased with the wide smile that soon spread across Laura's cheeks. 

"Oh, come here." Laura cupped Carmilla's cheeks and tugged her in for one of the most passionate kisses she thinks they've ever shared. Sure, they were both kneeling on the ground. Sure, they were smiling like fools. But yet, it was somehow one of the most passionate of kisses every passed between them. As they pulled back there were still wide smiles. Wide smiles and the threats of happy tears. 

"Well." Laura said with a shrug. "Now... We're engaged." 

The words sunk in.

"Holy shit." Carmilla muttered. "We're engaged."

"Holy shit we're engaged." Laura echoed. They locked eyes again.

"We're engaged!" They said in unison.

And so, it went like that in the perfectly not-so-perfect night, smiles wide, the night full of congratulations. Turns out, they bought each other's rings from the same store only hours apart, and planned this out at the same time, though each had different versions of how it would go. Even then, even with how weird it was, it was perfect because it was her. It was her and her honey brown eyes, soft lips, gentle touch and stubborn personality. It was Laura, the best god damn being to ever waltz into her life and she's never been so grateful.

Everything was always perfect with Laura. Everything. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos!


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